FabSwingers.com forum: Menopause part 2

By *aughtydealcouple OP Couple
17 weeks ago

Walmer, Deal

Since the other post has filled up and was usefull thought id start another one for us all to discuss the issues around it abd and helpful ideas for ladies suffering from it

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By *aven RedWoman
17 weeks ago

who knows, but it's not raining x

[Removed by poster at 06/01/26 00:06:33]

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By *aven RedWoman
17 weeks ago

who knows, but it's not raining x

I'm posting in this so I can come back and take some advice x

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By *effdelightMan
17 weeks ago

Grimsby

Ex was going through menopause so if I can help with any insight im happy to

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By *hortieWoman
17 weeks ago

Northampton

Wait.. there was a part one?? Lol

Well, I'll check back in tomorrow after beddy byes.. but I have one thing for now ...

How can I get the wetness back?!

First person to say ' do the shake'n'vac' either gets a Hi5 or a slap 😂

My natural sex drive yeeted itself off a cliff several months ago. It's incredibly hard to cum. So much so. I've had 3 treatments for UTI since. (From Wanking furiously, for the boys in the back).

I've had sex a couple times since with my buddy, and the mild bleeding is an obvious sign my vag needs some more tlc. Cause, I understand the standard lube alone doesn't look after the old girls lack of elasticity these days. And therefore the propensity for minor tears.

I saw a GP a few months ago, and she told me I could buy something from the chemist.

I went to the chemist and they said yep, but sorry... We've sold out of well woman perimenopause vitamins.

Umm.. ok.

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By *aughtydealcouple OP Couple
17 weeks ago

Walmer, Deal

"Wait.. there was a part one?? Lol

Well, I'll check back in tomorrow after beddy byes.. but I have one thing for now ...

How can I get the wetness back?!

First person to say ' do the shake'n'vac' either gets a Hi5 or a slap 😂

My natural sex drive yeeted itself off a cliff several months ago. It's incredibly hard to cum. So much so. I've had 3 treatments for UTI since. (From Wanking furiously, for the boys in the back).

I saw a GP a few months ago, and she told me I could buy something from the chemist.

I went to the chemist and they said yep, but sorry... We've sold out of well woman perimenopause vitamins.

Umm.. ok.

Yes there was a part one started by me a few months back its in the virus section suffered simliar issues myself in last few weeks

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By *hortieWoman
17 weeks ago

Northampton

Ughh.

Can the 'virus' forum get renamed now to 'Medical' or some such.

🤬

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By *aughtydealcouple OP Couple
17 weeks ago

Walmer, Deal

"Ughh.

Can the 'virus' forum get renamed now to 'Medical' or some such.

🤬"

Agree it does need renaming

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By *lder.Woman
17 weeks ago

Not Local

"Wait.. there was a part one?? Lol

Well, I'll check back in tomorrow after beddy byes.. but I have one thing for now ...

How can I get the wetness back?!

First person to say ' do the shake'n'vac' either gets a Hi5 or a slap 😂

My natural sex drive yeeted itself off a cliff several months ago. It's incredibly hard to cum. So much so. I've had 3 treatments for UTI since. (From Wanking furiously, for the boys in the back).

I saw a GP a few months ago, and she told me I could buy something from the chemist.

I went to the chemist and they said yep, but sorry... We've sold out of well woman perimenopause vitamins.

Umm.. ok.

Vaginal oestrogen cream, comes in a tube, but I think it needs a prescription.

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By *inister_SpinsterWoman
17 weeks ago

Manchester(ish).

Vaginal oestrogen is cheaper on prescription, so I'd get your gp to give it to you.

Theres a HRT annual scheme thru NHS, I think its £20 annually for all the meno meds your GP provides.

Its a topical cream with an applicator. It's not a miracle cure, but its a useful addition to the menopause potions.

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By *ina678Woman
17 weeks ago

None

"Wait.. there was a part one?? Lol

Well, I'll check back in tomorrow after beddy byes.. but I have one thing for now ...

How can I get the wetness back?!

First person to say ' do the shake'n'vac' either gets a Hi5 or a slap 😂

My natural sex drive yeeted itself off a cliff several months ago. It's incredibly hard to cum. So much so. I've had 3 treatments for UTI since. (From Wanking furiously, for the boys in the back).

I saw a GP a few months ago, and she told me I could buy something from the chemist.

I went to the chemist and they said yep, but sorry... We've sold out of well woman perimenopause vitamins.

Umm.. ok.

Happy to chat about this if you want to message- lots to share but can't message you. X

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By *CExeCouple
17 weeks ago

Hong-Kong/Exeter

My ex went into perimenopause at 33, likely as a response to an assault in the workplace. I knew all about menopause, but was shamefully ignorant of perimenopause and just how early it can be. An area that needs a lot more education and awareness.

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By *ove269Man
17 weeks ago

thistown

My wife is menopausal and has been for quite sometime, occasionally feels sexual more so if we’ve been out but on the whole she says she rarely feels sexual, she tried testosterone patch’s but they didn’t do much over than make her voice deep , (only joking)

We still cuddle and kiss but she gets a bit frustrated if I try and take things further. Still love her loads as she’s gorgeous

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By (user no longer on site)
17 weeks ago

Due to hysterectomy 6years back and then further surgery removing an ovary 3 years ago, i wasn’t told at the time that the other ovary i thought was normal had infact died, until 1 year ago. Turns out i had been raw dogging surgical menopause for past 3 years. I have other conditions i had blamed for my symptoms. One thing that hasn’t changed is my labido, I’m still horny pretty much 24/7, I do find it harder to reach climax. Is there a male menopause?? Because the husband is rarely horny but insists it’s nothing about me he just isn’t in the mood!

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By *inkyLips2.0Woman
16 weeks ago

Debauchery

"Due to hysterectomy 6years back and then further surgery removing an ovary 3 years ago, i wasn’t told at the time that the other ovary i thought was normal had infact died, until 1 year ago. Turns out i had been raw dogging surgical menopause for past 3 years. I have other conditions i had blamed for my symptoms. One thing that hasn’t changed is my labido, I’m still horny pretty much 24/7, I do find it harder to reach climax. Is there a male menopause?? Because the husband is rarely horny but insists it’s nothing about me he just isn’t in the mood!"

Men can get a decrease in testosterone which quells their libido

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By *inkyLips2.0Woman
16 weeks ago

Debauchery

These hot flushes and night sweats are driving me mad, I just want my fan on especially at night but my 15 year old dog is finding the cold too much for me to do that. Any suggestions?

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By *yr 48Man
16 weeks ago

ayrshire

I’m finding it hard to navigate my wife’s mood swings any advice would be very helpful

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By *iss DevilWoman
16 weeks ago

Hiding

"I’m finding it hard to navigate my wife’s mood swings any advice would be very helpful "
Google Dr Dr Brendan McCarthy, he has podcasts about menopause for men. Quite sobering, to be honest. It's a difficult time for all involved, especially if the communication is lacking.

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By *iss DevilWoman
16 weeks ago

Hiding

"I’m finding it hard to navigate my wife’s mood swings any advice would be very helpful "

Plus have a look at this thread: https://m.fabswingers.com/forum/support/1766656

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By *yr 48Man
16 weeks ago

ayrshire

Thanks for the help much appreciated

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By *aandLoCouple
16 weeks ago

Southampton

"Wait.. there was a part one?? Lol

Well, I'll check back in tomorrow after beddy byes.. but I have one thing for now ...

How can I get the wetness back?!

First person to say ' do the shake'n'vac' either gets a Hi5 or a slap 😂

My natural sex drive yeeted itself off a cliff several months ago. It's incredibly hard to cum. So much so. I've had 3 treatments for UTI since. (From Wanking furiously, for the boys in the back).

I saw a GP a few months ago, and she told me I could buy something from the chemist.

I went to the chemist and they said yep, but sorry... We've sold out of well woman perimenopause vitamins.

Umm.. ok.

Vaginal estrogen cream (Ovesse is one brand) is around £24 if you buy over the counter. The pharmacist will ask a few questions and determine if he can give it to you. It is cheaper as a prescription, or annual HRT certificate even better.

It should help with the dry vag symptoms.

The cream can also be used on your clit to improve sensitivity, but the evidence is anecdotal and it takes daily use for a few months to see any effect.

The alternative is a pessary tablet. The Gina brand is available over the counter for women over 50, again subject to passing the interview with the pharmacist, lol. But again cheaper to get the pessaries via GP.

I use the pessaries alongside cream on my clit. And lube, loads of lube! 💦💦

As for repeated cystitis I take D Mannose and it seems to reduce the number of occurrences. xx

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By (user no longer on site)
14 weeks ago

I am perimenopausal as I still get infrequent periods. I asked my GP for help as I was experiencing crawling skin it was awful and hot flushes. I also struggle to sleep many a night wide awake, low libido and dry vagina.

I hate how I’m feeling as I want to be intimate but have absolutely no inclination to do so.

I was put onto Evorel Sequi combined patches all my symptoms bar sleep have disappeared now. I’m very grateful that my doctor listened and put me on the patches.

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By (user no longer on site)
14 weeks ago

"Wait.. there was a part one?? Lol

Well, I'll check back in tomorrow after beddy byes.. but I have one thing for now ...

How can I get the wetness back?!

First person to say ' do the shake'n'vac' either gets a Hi5 or a slap 😂

My natural sex drive yeeted itself off a cliff several months ago. It's incredibly hard to cum. So much so. I've had 3 treatments for UTI since. (From Wanking furiously, for the boys in the back).

I saw a GP a few months ago, and she told me I could buy something from the chemist.

I went to the chemist and they said yep, but sorry... We've sold out of well woman perimenopause vitamins.

Umm.. ok.

There are various products from pharmacist for vaginal dryness. I asked my GP for eostrogen cream but he prescribed Replens MD vaginal moisturiser that can be bought over the counter. I can report it helps with dryness and is safe for anyone performing oral sex on you it’s tasteless.

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By *aughtydealcouple OP Couple
14 weeks ago

Walmer, Deal

Ladies who used to gush or squirm have you found menopause has stopped that I used to gush like a river but not anymore

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By *reat me rightWoman
14 weeks ago

Rotherham

Im lucky. I never had any of the hot flushes etc. My moods go up and down (but so do everybody elses). I no longer have any form of sex drive - nor do I miss it anymore either. My biggest problem was being told I wasn't in menopause by a male dr. Very insistent.

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By *aybow198Man
14 weeks ago

Southwest

jjdd247 hope mum better

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By *ihimbiherCouple
14 weeks ago

lightwater

It’s killing me.

Loss of sex drive,mood swings, anxiety,hot flushes…. The whole lot. On patches which are helpful but definitely not the cure

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By *ihimbiherCouple
14 weeks ago

lightwater

Thanks for this thread. It’s really good to read story’s that help me understand what is going on and that I’m not alone.xxxxx

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By *uperstar76Woman
14 weeks ago

North Lanarkshire

Ive been on HRT now for a few week, feel a bit better in myself dont feel like i stress as much and let things get to me, still have no sex drive and the thought of it makes me ill but im honestly not bothered about sex, will see how the HRT goes in a few months

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By *ertsman46Man
14 weeks ago

Hertfordshire

Men also need to be more understanding about this it’s a great forum

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By *uperstar76Woman
14 weeks ago

North Lanarkshire

"Men also need to be more understanding about this it’s a great forum "

Definitely! Had a message from a guy when i told him i wasnt looking he asked why so i explained and his reply was that if i met him hed be good enough to get my sex drive back

if it was that easy

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By *aandLoCouple
14 weeks ago

Southampton

"Ladies who used to gush or squirm have you found menopause has stopped that I used to gush like a river but not anymore "

It hasn't stopped it for me. But I do have clitoral atrophy so it takes a longer period of stimulation for me to cum that way. G spot still the magic tap though 🤣

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By *aandLoCouple
14 weeks ago

Southampton

"Ive been on HRT now for a few week, feel a bit better in myself dont feel like i stress as much and let things get to me, still have no sex drive and the thought of it makes me ill but im honestly not bothered about sex, will see how the HRT goes in a few months"

In my experience it took a few months for a noticeble improvement, and then after about 18 months I spoke to the menopause nurse about upping the dose as my symptoms were starting to return.

My surgery failed to contact me for a 12 month review, which I found out they should have done! So, do schedule that in as the required dose may change over time.

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By *uperstar76Woman
14 weeks ago

North Lanarkshire

In my experience it took a few months for a noticeble improvement, and then after about 18 months I spoke to the menopause nurse about upping the dose as my symptoms were starting to return.

My surgery failed to contact me for a 12 month review, which I found out they should have done! So, do schedule that in as the required dose may change over time."

Yeah my doc is great have to go back in a few months to see how am doing

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By *iss DevilWoman
14 weeks ago

Hiding

"Men also need to be more understanding about this it’s a great forum

Definitely! Had a message from a guy when i told him i wasnt looking he asked why so i explained and his reply was that if i met him hed be good enough to get my sex drive back

if it was that easy"

Yes, men absolutely need to get much more educated on the subject. But it doesn't help when women wouldn't talk about it (getting better now though).

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By *aandLoCouple
14 weeks ago

Southampton

"Men also need to be more understanding about this it’s a great forum

Definitely! Had a message from a guy when i told him i wasnt looking he asked why so i explained and his reply was that if i met him hed be good enough to get my sex drive back

if it was that easy

Yes, men absolutely need to get much more educated on the subject. But it doesn't help when women wouldn't talk about it (getting better now though). "

Yes, men do need to educate themselves but listening to us would be a good start. As women we know our bodies....

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By *WB couple400Couple
14 weeks ago

Newcastle

Ask doctor for hormone patches they work wonders for my wife not the fwb in my profile x

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By *igad999Man
14 weeks ago

wolverhampton

My wife’s 38 but for medical reasons had to have hysterectomy few years back so early menopause. Was given the hrt drugs etc but found without them. After recovery from the surgery we started sex again as she wanted to and was ready and tbf she’s always had high sex drive and not seen a drop in it before or since

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By *uperstar76Woman
14 weeks ago

North Lanarkshire

"My wife’s 38 but for medical reasons had to have hysterectomy few years back so early menopause. Was given the hrt drugs etc but found without them. After recovery from the surgery we started sex again as she wanted to and was ready and tbf she’s always had high sex drive and not seen a drop in it before or since "

Every woman is different and everyone has different menopause symptoms what works for one wont work for another

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By *ownton_fabbyCouple
14 weeks ago

Bedford

Every woman is different and everyone has different menopause symptoms what works for one wont work for another"

Exactly this. Such fun

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By *anther and gothic angelCouple
14 weeks ago

fairy land

There's a couple of options that work for me.

Boots menopause & me vaginal moisturising gel...it's an internal moisturiser that has hyaluronic acid.

Ovesse vaginal cream that has estrogen and you can buy it at the chemist

Ive been post menopausal for 12 years now and tried everything.

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By *ffortthatchickWoman
14 weeks ago

HEATHFIELD

You can also add testosterone into the mix as well as estrogen and progesterone. I haven't had a drop in my sex drive, in fact its higher than ever but do struggle with being drier. It has helped. It should be given on symptoms alone (you have to say your libido has dropped off a cliff) after a blood test.

There's not a magic pill but there are some really good groups on social media, like middle age madness.

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By *exySenseiCouple
13 weeks ago

"These hot flushes and night sweats are driving me mad, I just want my fan on especially at night but my 15 year old dog is finding the cold too much for me to do that. Any suggestions? "

HRT.

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By *elaninMaverickWoman
13 weeks ago

near Putney Heath

Did they take her ovaries or just the uterus?

If she still had her ovaries that might be why... If she doesn't have ovaries, she is one of the lucky ones who doesn't need HRT.

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By *elaninMaverickWoman
13 weeks ago

near Putney Heath

I'm in perimenopause but with the neurodivergent component added in...not fun at all.... The endocrinologist said I'm borderline.

1. Mood swings: made job fire me after being triggered and getting no support from them. Hide under weighted blanket most days for several hours. live on disability and UC.

2. hot flashes and night sweats: turn heating off and wear as little clothing as possible and sit in the cold plung pool at the nudist spas

3. Crippling fatigue: no idea...pacing as GP thinks it's chronic fatigue.

4. Libido: Became naturist, swinger, rope kinkster and fetishist. Lot more effort to feel sexy/horny now. I find intimacy in other ways.

5.Dry sensitive vagina: switched to reusable period products and using non-bio and washing pants (panties) lingerie seperately from everything else and a double rinse.

6. Wrinkles? Spared

7. Grey hair: not noticeable

8.Chin hair: plucked or hidden with foundation

9. Breast pain: only once. Thank God

10. Insomnia: incurable as Postcode lottery for CBT-I.

11. Joint and muscle pain: Lift weights, physio and sauna, steam room and jacuzzi. HIIT only twice a month. Low intensity, Low impact cardio.

12. Bloating: Coconut water, Kombucha, Kefir, Kimchi, Green smoothie, sauerkraut, 3 litres of mostly water and tea daily.

13. Weight gain/loss: Nothing. I lift more than I weigh so .....I no longer care how much I weigh unless GP chases me with Ozempic.

I'm in my Karen era. I have poly partners but I don't put up with nonsense! Literally turned into a headmistress who spanks and ties up men.....consenting men. Other men are afraid. Good. Most women spend half their lives scared of men...it's an interesting dynamic for the tables to be turned. Never thought I could scare a man but apparently I do.

I though middle aged women are supposed to be invisible but it appears I'm too tall and big to hide. Lol! Having an afro wig gives extra height.

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By *elaninMaverickWoman
13 weeks ago

near Putney Heath

"There's a couple of options that work for me.

Boots menopause & me vaginal moisturising gel...it's an internal moisturiser that has hyaluronic acid.

Ovesse vaginal cream that has estrogen and you can buy it at the chemist

Ive been post menopausal for 12 years now and tried everything."

Good to know. Once I turn 45 I can get my hormones (estrogen and progesterone) off a chemist and I think I'm going back on the Mirena with Progestorone.

I'd like to have my energy back and memory! Everything else I can cope with but the memory loss and fatigue are the worst for me.

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By *inkyLips2.0Woman
12 weeks ago

Debauchery

"These hot flushes and night sweats are driving me mad, I just want my fan on especially at night but my 15 year old dog is finding the cold too much for me to do that. Any suggestions?

HRT."

I can’t take hormones

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By *art1977Man
12 weeks ago

Brierley Hill

My wife has gone through it and shes on hrt but her sex drive doesn't exist anymore if we have sex once every few months its a miracle

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By *uperstar76Woman
12 weeks ago

North Lanarkshire

"My wife has gone through it and shes on hrt but her sex drive doesn't exist anymore if we have sex once every few months its a miracle "

try being her and her knowing she isnt performing that miracle for you! Menopause is so much more than not wanting sex

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By *hitelotusMan
12 weeks ago

london

Is menopause equivalent to low libido? Or could it have an opposite effect?

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By *art1977Man
12 weeks ago

Brierley Hill

"My wife has gone through it and shes on hrt but her sex drive doesn't exist anymore if we have sex once every few months its a miracle

try being her and her knowing she isnt performing that miracle for you! Menopause is so much more than not wanting sex "
no is understand shes always tired hot flushes and sex is the last thing on her mind she goes away on spa weekends with her friends alot to relax and im happy to do that its not just about sex I know

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By *inkyLips2.0Woman
12 weeks ago

Debauchery

"Is menopause equivalent to low libido? Or could it have an opposite effect? "

Menopause is so much more than a low libido. I’m going through it now but I haven’t yet lost my sex drive

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By *otshot14Woman
12 weeks ago

tunbridge wells

Going through it now,don't fancy any sex not bother at all,not wet from wanking,nor sex it's hurts to much.

Now I'm fed up and going to the gp to get something.had all the symptoms of it,but deffo not feeling sexy at all,and just want to sleep.

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By *im n her XXXCouple
12 weeks ago

Long Eaton

I didn’t loose my sex drive in fact it got better since starting HRT it was all the other shit it’s thrown at me that caused more problems the only thing I think I struggle with I’m all horny n turned on with my partner but I think I’m a bit dry down in the lady garden lol

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By *elaninMaverickWoman
12 weeks ago

near Putney Heath

I used to go to the spa with my ex husband.

Now in go to the naturist spa with kinksters and swingers.

What weekends away do you do with her?

The swinger couples, I know have weekends away together... and they use toys on each other since sticking things in the vagina can be painful during this period. That's what the swinger ladies told me who struggle. Sometimes the vagina is off limits but not their tits, clit, mouth or butt hole. And we do bring our toys to the club!

All the bisexual women use clit vibrators and fingers. Rare for them to bring dildos. I'm straight so until the vagina gives up I'll have dildos and real cock.

Have you every bought her a new sex toy for her clitoris with lube? Exciting Valentine's present!

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By *elaninMaverickWoman
12 weeks ago

near Putney Heath

Fun story about the time, I nearly poured my giant bottle of lube all over a menopausal lady in the couples room in the swinger club. She was very vocal about how dry she was....mid coitus.

Eventually, she asked if anyone had some and I'd never been so happy to pop up and leave in on the side next to her and her partner.

Interesting bag search in club when they think you bottle of lube is smuggled in alcohol.

. Everytime I have to tell them don't drink that. It goes in every hole except your mouth-hole.

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By *ormalfornorfolkMan
12 weeks ago

Norwich

Thank you to all the people sharing experiences here. We are entering this stage and I want to be as supportive as I possibly can. While avoiding mansplaining!

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By *anchesterTaurusMan
12 weeks ago

Prestwich

This has been really interesting to read because my current partner is struggling with this.

She described me touching her as "nailed on a chalkboard" the other day, which definitely requires some strength of character not to take personally hahaha

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By *ifelover999Man
12 weeks ago

Eastbourne

This has to be the most challenging times of a couples life...where the male gets a iron thrown at him (mood swings) or the woman has aircon at night in the winter!

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By *aughtydealcouple OP Couple
12 weeks ago

Walmer, Deal

"This has to be the most challenging times of a couples life...where the male gets a iron thrown at him (mood swings) or the woman has aircon at night in the winter!"

Good description but yer pretty much sums it up

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By *aughtydealcouple OP Couple
12 weeks ago

Walmer, Deal

[Removed by poster at 11/02/26 20:21:43]

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By *aughtydealcouple OP Couple
12 weeks ago

Walmer, Deal

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By *ustAPeakWoman
12 weeks ago

bd11

If you are getting UTI's ask the Dr for internal estrogen gel. This will stop the UTI's.

You can have it on top of HRT no problem

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By *aandLoCouple
12 weeks ago

Southampton

You absolutely can combine the pessaries with HRT patches, but for me it wasn't a total cure to not getting UTIs. It has reduced the number of UTIs I get though.

One important thing I was advised was to use plenty of lube when having sex.

Both work to minimise the potential of tearing the tissues that unfortunately thin as we progress through peri/menopause.

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By *otshot14Woman
7 weeks ago

tunbridge wells

I have finally got round to sorting my menopause out,mainly coz of hot flashes and being dry.

Fingers cross it works as I'm so fed up with lack of sleep and being drier than the Sahara Desert

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By *rettyCleverWoman
7 weeks ago

Worcs

Hi,

There is a really nice product called victory oil that is nourishing for the vulva and inside the vagina too. Look it up online and have a read to see what you think.

☺️

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By *aughtydealcouple OP Couple
4 weeks ago

Walmer, Deal

Does anyone else going through menopause find they bleed after intercourse if so any solution to it please

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By *ornucopiaMan
4 weeks ago

Bexley

"Ughh.

Can the 'virus' forum get renamed now to 'Medical' or some such.

🤬

Agree it does need renaming "

We can only hope but probably as much chance of it happening as Politics leaving the list of countries!

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By *ubcuckpupMan
4 weeks ago

Manchester

Is the menopause a virus?

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By *xx234sumCouple
4 weeks ago

Stockport

I'm struggling with peri, finding it hard to get the hrt balance right. I was on gel and progesterone tablets but couldn't tolerate them. The patches they've put me on instead aren't treating the symptoms as well as the gel was, but trying o get a go appointment with a doctor who actually 'gets it's is proving to be a nightmare

Anyone else just lost their confidence in themselves?

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By *uperstar76Woman
4 weeks ago

North Lanarkshire

"I'm struggling with peri, finding it hard to get the hrt balance right. I was on gel and progesterone tablets but couldn't tolerate them. The patches they've put me on instead aren't treating the symptoms as well as the gel was, but trying o get a go appointment with a doctor who actually 'gets it's is proving to be a nightmare

Anyone else just lost their confidence in themselves?"

Im on the gel and tabs and feel as though they are helping with stress and worrying, i still dont have confidence or a sex drive but im putting the confidence down to my weight gain and not being able to shift it.

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By *ATICS3Man
4 weeks ago

Wigan

No just a pause from men 😂

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By *mandamark99Couple
4 weeks ago

Bridgnorth

Been going through this for 14 years so far! Can’t take HRT and have so many issues

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By *dfabMan
4 weeks ago

Dunboyne

Have ye seen the documentary The Pink Pill?

Might be useful to some here, though I must caution that I've skimmed the above.

Basically a female Viagra that switches up libido and, I believe, secretions/ lubrication.

A worthwhile watch I thought.

Be well in all that ye do

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By *sWyldWoman
4 weeks ago

Edinburgh

I've been in Perimenopause now for around 3 years. The brain fog, anxiety, imposter syndrome, hot flushes, insomnia and weight issues have definitely been helped a bit by HRT. Combination of Lenzetto Spray and vaginal estrogen.

However the one issue I'm struggling with most still is bleeding during sex. I'm using an internal moisturiser and I'm definitely aroused and wet but its happened quite a few times now and its really dented my confidence as a result and means I'm even more in my head at times .

I'm lucky to have a very understanding FWB who couldn't be lovelier when it happens but it has made me almost want to avoid other people and the experiences we would both really like to find as it's unpredictable.

As a woman it's left me feeling a bit broken and while my sex drive is still there, fear takes over.

GP has done every check but I'm told its just one of those things and I'm doing all the right stuff. I hate the thought that at the time when I should feel most confident, liberated and free, I can't be , and also, how many years will this last!

To everyone going through this, I hope things get easier.

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By (user no longer on site)
4 weeks ago

This is obviously an outside experience of a partner.

She started to go through menopause in late 30s, got to the point of having hrt, but hated it as it started to give back monthly bleeds.

Last year proper menopause, but luckily for us it has not affected her so drive negatively. But sometimes her body will have had enough say 20 mins in. Which is no issue, we still had great intimacy.

The flushes is hard on her, she has always been a cooler temperature. So adjusting to the constant change and buying different hooded tops with zips to breath a bit more. My advice as a cyclist, a tiny bit more flesh out around the neck can make you fee so much better.

Brain fog is there, have learnt to roll with it, no humour. Can have irrational moments, well I am the punch bag or whipping boy for that. You got to be the one to help her vent.

Irong I have male symptoms and have treatment. So can understand brain fog, feeling much to warm and energy being off. But still nothing like Menopause symptoms.

If I Wass to give advice, it's listen, really try to perk them up as if a new couple. Notice harder if they seem off and just accept some nonsense, because that's what relationships are for.

I think her symptoms are nowhere near as bad as others, but I feel subtle support is not hat all suffering need.

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By (user no longer on site)
4 weeks ago

"Is menopause equivalent to low libido? Or could it have an opposite effect? "

Can go either way. My wife wants more. But many don't want sex so much

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By *viatrixWoman
4 weeks ago

Gatwick

5 years in perimenopause for me and I’ve pretty much have had enough.

The anxiety, the panic, the self-doubt, erratic periods, palpitations and the intense feeling of impending doom can all do one. I am sick and tired of this.

But still haven’t made an appointment to the GP for HRT 🤣🤣🤣 I don’t know if it will help!

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By *rumjoe3Man
4 weeks ago

Birmingham

Yes a tough time for all involved

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By *illynillyCouple
4 weeks ago

Wiltshire

"5 years in perimenopause for me and I’ve pretty much have had enough.

The anxiety, the panic, the self-doubt, erratic periods, palpitations and the intense feeling of impending doom can all do one. I am sick and tired of this.

But still haven’t made an appointment to the GP for HRT 🤣🤣🤣 I don’t know if it will help!

Morning...

I had a total hysterectomy in 2014, keeping 1 ovary...fast forward to a year ago when I started oestrogel... I d been suffering for years but being a martyr I just carried on thinking hrt wouldn't help... absolute game changer... joint pain less...brain fog less...weird anxiety less...the list goes on...definitely worth a try... happy to discuss more

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By *ngry IngridWoman
4 weeks ago

Cardigan

My libido started disappearing in 2020.

Been having hot flushes on and off for a couple of years usually around 9.10 at night (what's that about!).

Severe brain fog last year for a bit until I started taking supplements. Now I resort to writing everything down that I need to do.

Last period was June last year. If by any miracle I do get aroused, I still get wet but the rest of the time it's very dry. We have a history of breast cancer in the family so unfortunately I can't go down the route of HRT.

I'm 45 and feel like thats it for my sex life

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By *illynillyCouple
4 weeks ago

Wiltshire

"My libido started disappearing in 2020.

Been having hot flushes on and off for a couple of years usually around 9.10 at night (what's that about!).

Severe brain fog last year for a bit until I started taking supplements. Now I resort to writing everything down that I need to do.

I'm 45 and feel like thats it for my sex life

Morning, the old type hrt was synthetic...as gp about the gels, although with womb progesterone is also suggested... the flushes are intense aren't they...before hrt I was flushing every 2 hours.. like next level flushes and being tearful was new for me..within 6 weeks of starting it it all definitely calmed down

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By *ngry IngridWoman
4 weeks ago

Cardigan

"My libido started disappearing in 2020.

Been having hot flushes on and off for a couple of years usually around 9.10 at night (what's that about!).

Severe brain fog last year for a bit until I started taking supplements. Now I resort to writing everything down that I need to do.

I'm 45 and feel like thats it for my sex life

I have to go outside to cool down 😂

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By *illynillyCouple
4 weeks ago

Wiltshire

"My libido started disappearing in 2020.

Been having hot flushes on and off for a couple of years usually around 9.10 at night (what's that about!).

Severe brain fog last year for a bit until I started taking supplements. Now I resort to writing everything down that I need to do.

I'm 45 and feel like thats it for my sex life

I have to go outside to cool down 😂"

It's ridiculous isn't it...I still get them just not as severe or as many...joint pain in my hands is slightly better with the gel too

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By *hitelotusMan
4 weeks ago

london

I have heard the low libido effect of menopause can be reversed by the age of your sexual partners. Is it correct ?

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By *ellinever70Woman
4 weeks ago

Ayrshire

"I have heard the low libido effect of menopause can be reversed by the age of your sexual partners. Is it correct ? "

You've been listening to nonsense

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By *illynillyCouple
4 weeks ago

Wiltshire

"I have heard the low libido effect of menopause can be reversed by the age of your sexual partners. Is it correct ?

You've been listening to nonsense "

Guess it was leading up to "you're as young as the man you feel " ....so yes, absolute nonsense

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By *heNaughtyHubby21Man
4 weeks ago

colwyn bay

My wife has been suffering with the menopause for roughly about 12 months or so now. She has tried a few things from hrt which didn’t seem to help at all, to supplements available most shops.

What she has found helps her and is by no means a miracle. Nutrition geeks do a supplement pack for the menopause which paired with St John’s wort is what seems to have helped her.

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By *uperstar76Woman
4 weeks ago

North Lanarkshire

"I have heard the low libido effect of menopause can be reversed by the age of your sexual partners. Is it correct ? "

No sex drive means i dont want sex with anyone older or younger, so youve heard wrong

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