FabSwingers.com forum: Single guys at clubs and boundaries

By *lackCherry OP Couple
over a year ago

Bristol

Recently after some very good single guy meets we have ventured into clubs. We have tried days with single guys and well have been left a bit mystified.

Firstly, in and around playing in a public area, if we were whats the etiquette expected from the single guys ? I assume to "ask" before they do anything yes not just starting touching Mrs C ?

Secondly, in a "locked" room if they were to just open the door how are you supposed to react to that ?

just wondering what the de facto rules are here.

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By *edangel_2013Woman
over a year ago

southend

If a room is shut and they just walk in, they are usually breaking club rules, just politely tell them to "do one". I find fuck off usually works well!

While it is polite to ask if they can touch, and general good manners, in a public club area, those 3 things generally go out of the window with single guys, some, not all. Again, I find a polite "no" works the first time, the second time "fuck off" tends to get the point across.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Surely if the room is locked, they cannot get in?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We go to single guys nights at clubs more than any other type of meet. Guys will stand and watch and if my wife wants to play with them she'll often just look directly at them or beckon to them. If she doesn't want them she'll say 'no thanks' if a hand wanders.

As for rooms, if a guy were to enter a 'locked' room again a polite 'no' is enough.

Very occasionally (maybe two or three times over several years) a guy has got a bit pouty about being turned down. One guy once said "what do you mean 'no'" Another single guy explained to him and he left. It seems you'll always get help if someone needs further explanation! That was very much the exception to how it normally is.

We love going to clubs as Mrs is very greedy!

Have fun xx

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By *lackCherry OP Couple
over a year ago

Bristol

"Surely if the room is locked, they cannot get in?

these locks are not all that good it seems !

and yeah we love clubs but this is really to find out if were in the right or wrong in expecting guys just not to start touching Mrs C and ask first :P

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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

"Recently after some very good single guy meets we have ventured into clubs. We have tried days with single guys and well have been left a bit mystified.

Firstly, in and around playing in a public area, if we were whats the etiquette expected from the single guys ? I assume to "ask" before they do anything yes not just starting touching Mrs C ?

Secondly, in a "locked" room if they were to just open the door how are you supposed to react to that ?

just wondering what the de facto rules are here.

The etiquette is that single guys should wait to be invited. In every club I've been in there are notices saying 'no means no', so if you want to play with a particular person just ask. Most men won't approach you, although there is an annoying minority.

If a room is locked and someone managed to get in then have a word with the owners to get it fixed! Oh, and get used to being watched by any man you're not playing with, if you choose to play in a public room.

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By *lackCherry OP Couple
over a year ago

Bristol

being Watched is a massive turn on, however them just starting to touch or join in without word is the issue really!

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By *landPeggyCouple
over a year ago

Holland !

Pretty self policing in our humble opinion, single guys appreciating the opportunities will soon sort out a single guy who is blowing it for everybody, if you'll pardon the pun.

The management of the club won't hesitate to kick out unruly members either.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Pretty self policing in our humble opinion, single guys appreciating the opportunities will soon sort out a single guy who is blowing it for everybody, if you'll pardon the pun.

The management of the club won't hesitate to kick out unruly members either. "

That's true the management usually act promptly so report anything untoward to them.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

being Watched is a massive turn on, however them just starting to touch or join in without word is the issue really!"

Most clubs tend to have rules in place to govern this sort of thing. Have you looked at the club you attend?

The locked/not locked doors are sounding not so good aswell.

The usual thing is that no always means no and respect for people at all times. Any problems should always be reported to the club's management.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Pretty self policing in our humble opinion, single guys appreciating the opportunities will soon sort out a single guy who is blowing it for everybody, if you'll pardon the pun.

The management of the club won't hesitate to kick out unruly members either. "

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

"Pretty self policing in our humble opinion, single guys appreciating the opportunities will soon sort out a single guy who is blowing it for everybody, if you'll pardon the pun.

The management of the club won't hesitate to kick out unruly members either. "

absolutely..... 100%.... guys will let other guys know pretty sharpish if they fuck it up for others......

actually... expanding this a bit....the one thing i have found that from going to clubs is that for some reason some guys will act different on a "mixed night" than on a "greedy girls" night.... or should I say, they tend to attract different sorts of people....

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By *emima_puddlefuckCouple
over a year ago

hexham

being Watched is a massive turn on, however them just starting to touch or join in without word is the issue really!

Most clubs tend to have rules in place to govern this sort of thing. Have you looked at the club you attend?

The locked/not locked doors are sounding not so good aswell.

The usual thing is that no always means no and respect for people at all times. Any problems should always be reported to the club's management."

The room u play in matters, in the round room at chams or the group room at clubf guys tend to touch shoulder or arm if they dont just ask...in normal group rooms i expect to be asked...or kev to be, though quite often i do the asking

Greedy girls nights are more of a free for all...

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By *littylikka69Man
over a year ago

West Midlands

i remember at chams once,a lady was playing with 2 guys on the seating outside the cinema and got annoyed cos people were watching!,for fuck sake whats that all about?.

its the single guys that get the stick all the while but there are enough rooms to play in at chams!.

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By *ub bbwWoman
over a year ago

oldbury

Its just manners in general in the club that seem to have gone we were in there a week ago and yes i was in the cinema so a public play area but there was some old boy who came and sat next to me and just started to touching my bum while i was busy with Sir i pushed his hand away and he came back for more but i slapped his hand this time and moved away he kept coming back for more then tried to get me to suck him off i told him to fuck off and learn some manners. The younger single guys seem much more respectful in there tho and always ask permission before touching either of us which is appreciatted.

Just remember if you dont like something speak out altho if playing in public areas expect an audience there was someone playing in the round room the other night and they left as there was too much attention in there on them she was sat outside after moaning about it but if you dont like it say dont just take it

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By *adchickCouple
over a year ago

Cyprus

This is what I tell single guys about club etiquette.

If in a jacuzzi........ touch the knee of the lady. If said hand is removed or she says no....... then it's a no.

If she does not remove it...... try a little further up and keep going until she either moves, says no or removes hand. If she doesn't move, say no or remove said hand......... you're in there, but if she is with someone ..... ffs check with him before slapping on a condom or if she is alone, ask her if she would like you to fuck her.

Locked rooms...... are locked for a reason. Unless you have been invited in...... you ain't going in there.

Open rooms..... slightly more difficult. If a locked room has the door open, it is usually an open invitation to wander in. Touch a shoulder or a leg or better still, ask the gentleman she is with if it's ok to touch.........

removal of hand or a No is just that..... a No.

Talk to people, general chit chat, most couples and single women will let you know if they are up for you joining them.

The cinema and the round room at Chams are laws unto themselves.

same etiquette applies. Touch somewhere noneu sexual first and gage it from there. Always check with the gentlman (if there is one) that it is ok and then check with the lady.....

And before anyone jumps on me for saying that the single man should speak to the gentleman of the couple......... it works for us and I've seen it work for thousands of others....... the gentleman of the couple will generally have a bloody good idea of what the lady wants and what is acceptable to them!

Above all..... be polite, don't sulk if you are rebuffed and talk to people......!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

we had experience by 'locked' i think they mean shut door which most understand to mean company not needed. but single guy night a guy decided to open top half of door at which point a fuck off was issued when single guy had cheat to ask if it was private play a yes thats why door is shut

he had cheeky to say i was shy

but hey mostly single guys r respectful xxxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"This is what I tell single guys about club etiquette.

If in a jacuzzi........ touch the knee of the lady. If said hand is removed or she says no....... then it's a no.

Locked rooms...... are locked for a reason. Unless you have been invited in...... you ain't going in there.

removal of hand or a No is just that..... a No.

Talk to people, general chit chat, most couples and single women will let you know if they are up for you joining them.

The cinema and the round room at Chams are laws unto themselves.

same etiquette applies. Touch somewhere noneu sexual first and gage it from there. Always check with the gentlman (if there is one) that it is ok and then check with the lady.....

Above all..... be polite, don't sulk if you are rebuffed and talk to people......!"

this is really good advice because if lady is the boss if u talk to her fella she will so let u know she is boss

and i avoids confusion x

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By *littylikka69Man
over a year ago

West Midlands

"Just remember if you dont like something speak out altho if playing in public areas expect an audience there was someone playing in the round room the other night and they left as there was too much attention in there on them she was sat outside after moaning about it but if you dont like it say dont just take it"

some people do have strange ideas though dont they?,i mean the lady playing with 2 guys on the bench seat outside the chams cinema room and the lady going into the round bed room wanting privacy!,whats that all about?.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We've been to do's where we've taken a private room with another couple and closed the door, and people have just barged in, or opened and closed the door whilst we're playing which is really offputting. We then had an invasion of single guys and in the end gave up play as a bad job. The only way we'd have got around it was to push the bed against the door as a barricade, and that we thought was way extreme!

It seems when reminded that there are etiquette rules they use the excuse of being blissfully unaware, yet they know alright. I was at another club and got hugged from behind by a guy while playing at which I turned round and said 'Not today, thank you!'.

I worry more over the initial approach myself than getting my end away, and will wait to be beckoned or asked over than ever risk getting a 'no' - too old fash'd maybe

Wolf

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We go to single guys nights at clubs more than any other type of meet. Guys will stand and watch and if my wife wants to play with them she'll often just look directly at them or beckon to them. If she doesn't want them she'll say 'no thanks' if a hand wanders.

As for rooms, if a guy were to enter a 'locked' room again a polite 'no' is enough.

We love going to clubs as Mrs is very greedy!

Have fun xx"

Could have been talking about us there - exactly the same for us, love single guys!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Recently after some very good single guy meets we have ventured into clubs. We have tried days with single guys and well have been left a bit mystified.

Firstly, in and around playing in a public area, if we were whats the etiquette expected from the single guys ? I assume to "ask" before they do anything yes not just starting touching Mrs C ?

Secondly, in a "locked" room if they were to just open the door how are you supposed to react to that ?

just wondering what the de facto rules are here.

i expect the same etiquette from single guys as i do anyone in there?

To be honest it depends on the situation but i have to say in my experience i find its women in clubs that touch me without asking more than men, because single guys know women will kick off and get then banned if they 'step out of line' they tend to be polite and well behaved, some women on the other had think they above the club rule because they are women and think its ok to just start sucking on the tits of any other women on the same bed as them

Always seems to be guys who everyone moans about but in my experiece i find couple more so the women of couple touch me without making sure its ok or even if im bi then single guys do

everyone in the club should play by the same rules, male or female

And how do you open the door ro a locked room?

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By *emima_puddlefuckCouple
over a year ago

hexham

"Recently after some very good single guy meets we have ventured into clubs. We have tried days with single guys and well have been left a bit mystified.

Firstly, in and around playing in a public area, if we were whats the etiquette expected from the single guys ? I assume to "ask" before they do anything yes not just starting touching Mrs C ?

Secondly, in a "locked" room if they were to just open the door how are you supposed to react to that ?

just wondering what the de facto rules are here.

i expect the same etiquette from single guys as i do anyone in there?

Always seems to be guys who everyone moans about but in my experiece i find couple more so the women of couple touch me without making sure its ok or even if im bi then single guys do

everyone in the club should play by the same rules, male or female

And how do you open the door ro a locked room?"

i have been quite shocked by a few of the comments on here...i always ask the woman or her partner if she is playing ,firstly if she is bi, and secondly could i join in...i am amazed some women just leap on.

When it is a couple i tend to ask if they would like to play, then give them time alone to decide, if im going to play with just one of the couple i ask the other partner, then again leave them alone to decide...

i might be missing out on loads of sex from the sounds of it, but some of the behaviour on here just seems so rude

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By *emima_puddlefuckCouple
over a year ago

hexham

"This is what I tell single guys about club etiquette.

If in a jacuzzi........ touch the knee of the lady. If said hand is removed or she says no....... then it's a no.

Locked rooms...... are locked for a reason. Unless you have been invited in...... you ain't going in there.

removal of hand or a No is just that..... a No.

Talk to people, general chit chat, most couples and single women will let you know if they are up for you joining them.

The cinema and the round room at Chams are laws unto themselves.

same etiquette applies. Touch somewhere noneu sexual first and gage it from there. Always check with the gentlman (if there is one) that it is ok and then check with the lady.....

Above all..... be polite, don't sulk if you are rebuffed and talk to people......!"

kev always appreciates being asked first, and if he is happy i am happy and far more likely to shag...for us the ideal (if i am going off by myself) would be, me and fella chatting, he asks if i am interested...then he goes and checks with kev...then he suggests we play now....giving me an opportunity to check with kev and tell him where we will be

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By *aveandkate35Couple
over a year ago

telford

I sympathise with single guys on this subject- I don't think it's possible to please all

Thr people all the time! I think

The best you can do is be respectful and polite and go from there.

For us if we want privacy we use a locked room and lock it - if half way through we change our mind we'll unlock it and expect to get people walking in. if your in a room than can be opened from outside, personally I expect people to walk in, HOWEVER on a few rooms I've seen like this in chams (non lockable) a towel over the door seems to symbolise keep out.

Thanks

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By *lackCherry OP Couple
over a year ago

Bristol

i might be missing out on loads of sex from the sounds of it, but some of the behaviour on here just seems so rude

agree with that

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By *littylikka69Man
over a year ago

West Midlands

"I sympathise with single guys on this subject- I don't think it's possible to please all

Thr people all the time! I think

The best you can do is be respectful and polite and go from there.

Thanks

some doors with the towel draped over seem to be a challenge to some folks though!.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I also think you have to read the situation, some people like to be asked some like a free for all but you can tell by whats happening which the lady is after

Ive been in clubs before and done gang bangs and to be honest if i was mid play sucking a guys cock while being fucked and someone tapped on my shoulder and asked if they could join in id be a bit annoyed, but thats just me

I dont expect anyone to ask me if they can join in but what i do expect is if they do touch me and i say no thanks to them that they stop straight away, but again thats just me

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

of course, some of the guys wandering are the husbands as Mrs is chatting in the bar.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I sympathise with single guys on this subject- I don't think it's possible to please all

Thr people all the time! I think

The best you can do is be respectful and polite and go from there.

Thanks

some doors with the towel draped over seem to be a challenge to some folks though!.

they maybe a symbol to keep out to customers but infact rooms without locks on are classes as open rooms so by rights you have no rights telling people to stay out

Ive seen people in chams in the room with the caged bed and they have wedged the chair against the door to stop people going in, now in my opinion they are the ignorant ones for assuming they can just take over a room that others may want to also use and anyone pushing their way in regardless of the chair being there has every rights to do so

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By *littylikka69Man
over a year ago

West Midlands

i have srrn that done myself!

you look through the side _iewing window to see some sat on the seat close up to the door trying to claim the room as a private playroom.

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By *emima_puddlefuckCouple
over a year ago

hexham

"I also think you have to read the situation, some people like to be asked some like a free for all but you can tell by whats happening which the lady is after

I dont expect anyone to ask me if they can join in but what i do expect is if they do touch me and i say no thanks to them that they stop straight away, but again thats just me"

this is very true, but then i think more experienced male club goers tend to know how to read a situation anyway.

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By *aveandkate35Couple
over a year ago

telford

"I sympathise with single guys on this subject- I don't think it's possible to please all

Thr people all the time! I think

The best you can do is be respectful and polite and go from there.

Thanks

some doors with the towel draped over seem to be a challenge to some folks though!.

they maybe a symbol to keep out to customers but infact rooms without locks on are classes as open rooms so by rights you have no rights telling people to stay out

I've never seen that - but agree that's totally out of order. Especially when the swing is one of our favourite things.

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By *ptimusDMan
over a year ago

Birmingham

I've often found that it is a lack of common sense from either couples or singles that result in unwanted advances.

A locked room clearly means nobody else is wanted. If there's no lock but the door is closed, then a prompt & firm "We're okay, thanks" usually suffices if someone tries to get in.

Most clubs have clearly labeled rules for different rooms or areas of the club. If these are adhered to, then it is unlikely there'll be any confusion.

A couple who walks past several areas marked "Couples Only" or "Singles By Invitation" in full _iew of everyone present, and then sits and starts playing in an area marked "Couples Looking For Singles"... shouldn't complain if the single guys already sat there, smack their lips, rub their hands together and hone in like a heat seeking missile.

If such a couple complains then they have themselves to blame because they are seriously lacking in common sense. If they wanted to play on their own or pick & choose the guys they want to join them, they should have used the correct area of the club reserved for this.

Everyone has a responsibility to act sensibly, not just single guys.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We were at chameleons last night and have to say the younger single guys where much politer than the older ones. There was a large number of respectful guys who asked to join in, but an alarming number of cock shovers who pushed the nice ones out the way. We expect (although it appears unrealistic) for single guys to behave the same as any member of the swinging community. That said the vast majority are great and we look forward to meeting you on our next trip! :D

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It should apply to single ladies too was playing me and my partner and a great couple last night fair enough in a public room had just switched partners and this lady just came and snatched the guys cock out my hand. I was flabbergasted

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

the rules apply to everyone and not just single guys. I've had same problems with couples and single females and believe me the females from couples have got really upset and angry when you say no

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It should apply to single ladies too was playing me and my partner and a great couple last night fair enough in a public room had just switched partners and this lady just came and snatched the guys cock out my hand. I was flabbergasted

he better have complained lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

and its not my fault my cocks like a lock pick!...I accidentally opened the door.....

honest!

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