FabSwingers.com forum: How to spot a "no show" in advance.

By *iveshowcouple OP Couple
over a year ago

glasgow

It occurs to me that one of the most obvious signs that somebody is going to perform a "no show" for a meet is the way they respond to messages.

I noticed that when first contact is made they write back immediately. Respond very positively.

As the date agreed nears they dont respond as quickly. Then in the last days leading up to the meet they dont even open the messages.

At that point it is blindingly obvious they will not bother turning up.

Anyone noticed other clues?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This is the main one. It's why I tend to write a friendly message the day before saying I'm looking forward to meeting. If this doesn't get read or isn't replied to it's almost certain they'll be a no show

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By *iveshowcouple OP Couple
over a year ago

glasgow

One hidden verification raises alarm bells as well. Particular if is from ages back.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Slow responses to msgs and , when meet agreed, not sharing mob number for txts( usually with a “ it’s my work phone” nonsense!!)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Slow responses to msgs and , when meet agreed, not sharing mob number for txts( usually with a “ it’s my work phone” nonsense!!)"

Not a chance in hell I'd give anyone off here my mobile number!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It occurs to me that one of the most obvious signs that somebody is going to perform a "no show" for a meet is the way they respond to messages.

I noticed that when first contact is made they write back immediately. Respond very positively.

As the date agreed nears they dont respond as quickly. Then in the last days leading up to the meet they dont even open the messages.

At that point it is blindingly obvious they will not bother turning up.

Anyone noticed other clues?"

I think you're right. Trust your gut too.

If they want sex chat before a meet they just want a wank and won't turn up.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Slow responses to msgs and , when meet agreed, not sharing mob number for txts( usually with a “ it’s my work phone” nonsense!!)

Not a chance in hell I'd give anyone off here my mobile number! "

We won't give our number out.

We now plan to get a cheap PAYG that will only be turned on for meets.

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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL

"Slow responses to msgs and , when meet agreed, not sharing mob number for txts( usually with a “ it’s my work phone” nonsense!!)

Not a chance in hell I'd give anyone off here my mobile number!

We won't give our number out.

We now plan to get a cheap PAYG that will only be turned on for meets. "

I use one for fab and dating, any problems, just put a new sim card in

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By *ara JTV/TS
over a year ago

Bristol East

I don't arrange to meet days ahead.

Spontaneity works better - when I'm in the mood, I see who else is.

Arrange to meet up.

The alarm bells start to ring when you think you are seeing someone in an hour or so and they start asking:

a) a whole load of questions that ought to be asked before setting anything up

b) to send them pictures (why? you're getting the real thing)

c) to send them dirty-talk messages (ditto)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It occurs to me that one of the most obvious signs that somebody is going to perform a "no show" for a meet is the way they respond to messages.

I noticed that when first contact is made they write back immediately. Respond very positively.

As the date agreed nears they dont respond as quickly. Then in the last days leading up to the meet they dont even open the messages.

At that point it is blindingly obvious they will not bother turning up.

Anyone noticed other clues?"
profile hidden, not on as much but I like to get telephone number and speak on phone, that lowers odds

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We’ve never had a no-show. Contrary to most people’s approach, we are transparent and expect the same. Mobile numbers, face pics etc are exchanged. If someone is secretive our barriers go up. We respect that many have a very good reason for holding back, but a lot will hold back because they are not genuine. As we are uncertain as to how to tell the difference, it’s easier to stick with people who are also transparent. That’s our way of avoiding the bullshit that seems to be the norm for so many Fab users.

Mrs

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By *acavityMan
over a year ago

Redditch

“Responding too quickly"

"Taking too long to reply"

It's a delicate balancing act.

But too much sexting before a meet is definitely a red flag.

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By *bwlookingforfunWoman
over a year ago

crawley

"Slow responses to msgs and , when meet agreed, not sharing mob number for txts( usually with a “ it’s my work phone” nonsense!!)"

I never give my phone number for the same reason.

I didnt know it makes me pitential "no show"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It occurs to me that one of the most obvious signs that somebody is going to perform a "no show" for a meet is the way they respond to messages.

I noticed that when first contact is made they write back immediately. Respond very positively.

As the date agreed nears they dont respond as quickly. Then in the last days leading up to the meet they dont even open the messages.

At that point it is blindingly obvious they will not bother turning up.

Anyone noticed other clues?"

Yeah, they don’t turn up, that’s usually a give away.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’d say pay attention to their language, particularly the tenses they use, ie “it would be a great night” rather than “it will...”

If they’re not thinking in certainties it shows up there

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By *eeshelleTV/TS
over a year ago

Marlow

Not wanting to speak on the phone is a tell tale sign they are not genuine.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If we fancy meeting then we'll meet within a few hours of making that decision. In our time doing this we've never had a no show. I'm not surprised there's so many no shows on meets that are planned days and weeks in advance as people are fickle and they've probably moved on to someone who can meet quicker or they've had a wank over your pics/chat and no longer care to meet

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Slow responses to msgs and , when meet agreed, not sharing mob number for txts( usually with a “ it’s my work phone” nonsense!!)

Not a chance in hell I'd give anyone off here my mobile number! "

we wont either never have been swinging a long time now never give out phone/email or any apps ..no chance

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I’d say pay attention to their language, particularly the tenses they use, ie “it would be a great night” rather than “it will...”

If they’re not thinking in certainties it shows up there "

That's a good tip.

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By *htcMan
over a year ago

i normally go by the reply, the answers they give, yes or no, short messages, quick replys, good looking people usually.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hmm. We give our number to all meets. Only had one no show but he was a regular anyway.

There is a block feature on most phones you know. If you don’t want someone calling just add their number to the block list. No need for a new phone or sim.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've given my number out to a few people, it's just easier to chat that way. As soon as they start acting weird or asking too many questions they get blocked on my phone and here. I'm pretty open I think, and will take most people on face value until proven otherwise.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"One hidden verification raises alarm bells as well. Particular if is from ages back."

Verifications not showing are not necessarily hidden. I have 2 but only one showing because the couple who gave it to me left the site. When that happens the veri remains but what they said disappears.

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By *he Happy ManMan
over a year ago

Merseyside

I have never had a no show. That is because 99% of people I have met I have first spent time getting to know them online. You know if the messages dry up they are no longer interested or are timewasters. Fair enough if somebody is no longer interested in you. We all have the right to lose interest in somebody. I sometimes spend months getting to know somebody online before we meet.

If you spend time getting to know somebody online you out the guys looking for a quick one off fuck (I am not BI that one is aimed at the ladies and couples), the timewasters, the people looking for another notch on their bedpost, the weirdoes, the fantasists, the creeps, etc.

Also if you spend time getting to know somebody online if you do progress to meeting you avoid all the awkward silences as you have already gotten to know each other online.

I know this is a sex site but what is wrong with wooing the person or couple you like? Take time to get to know them, find out their interests (non sexual), find out what makes them laugh, find out their sexual likes, dislikes and interests, etc., Maybe also find out what they like to eat and drink and invite them over for a 3 course meal. As I have aid just because it's a sex site we don't have to treat people like pieces of meat or another notch on the bedpost.

One way you can tell a meet is never going to happen is if the male half of the couple asks you what you would do to his wife or girlfriend if you were to meet them. You know once he has finished masturbating you will never hear from him again. The wife/girlfriend probably doesn’t know he is on Fab.

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By *he Happy ManMan
over a year ago

Merseyside

"Slow responses to msgs and , when meet agreed, not sharing mob number for txts( usually with a “ it’s my work phone” nonsense!!)

Not a chance in hell I'd give anyone off here my mobile number!

We won't give our number out.

We now plan to get a cheap PAYG that will only be turned on for meets. "

Great idea. Have a cheap PAYG phone that you only use for meets. If you give your number to an idiot or a pest you throw away the sim card and get a new one to put in your cheap PAYG phone.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"One hidden verification raises alarm bells as well. Particular if is from ages back.

Pretty sure when people leave the site the verification, and in your summary, does completely too, have had it happen in the past. May be wrong...

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By *he Happy ManMan
over a year ago

Merseyside

"I have never had a no show. That is because 99% of people I have met I have first spent time getting to know them online. You know if the messages dry up they are no longer interested or are timewasters. Fair enough if somebody is no longer interested in you. We all have the right to lose interest in somebody. I sometimes spend months getting to know somebody online before we meet.

Also if you spend time getting to know somebody online if you do progress to meeting you avoid all the awkward silences as you have already gotten to know each other online.

Also let's be honest here we want to meet people from Fab for sex. If you spend time getting to know somebody you will find out if you are sexually compatible. For example if you love giving women oral sex would you want to meet a woman who hates receiving oral sex?

Taking your time getting to know someobdy online first is my way to go.

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By *naquest321Man
over a year ago

Carlisle

Just don’t understand why there’s so many no shows.

I know, I don’t get many messages (well from women) probably because I don’t have pics up but why say you’d meet if you have know intention of doing so. Is it the initial, thrill of the chase?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It occurs to me that one of the most obvious signs that somebody is going to perform a "no show" for a meet is the way they respond to messages.

I noticed that when first contact is made they write back immediately. Respond very positively.

As the date agreed nears they dont respond as quickly. Then in the last days leading up to the meet they dont even open the messages.

At that point it is blindingly obvious they will not bother turning up.

Anyone noticed other clues?"
binoculars

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Just don’t understand why there’s so many no shows.

I know, I don’t get many messages (well from women) probably because I don’t have pics up but why say you’d meet if you have know intention of doing so. Is it the initial, thrill of the chase? "

This, plus I think a lot of unhappily married/attached people like the feeling that they could pull someone attractive but are too scared to escape their unsatisfactory situation

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

They do have the intention of meeting when they say it but so many things get in the way of doing it eg somebody better comes along, the wife runs off with his best mate, it's raining that day, the car broke down, it's lady weeks,they have nerves, they aren't the people in the pics they showed you, an unexpected bill, the world cups on and a game he wanted to watch came on just as they were walking out the door , she couldn't find anything to wear, she ran out of Elizabeth Ardent blusher sacre bleu etc etcetera etcetera

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"They do have the intention of meeting when they say it but so many things get in the way of doing it eg somebody better comes along, the wife runs off with his best mate, it's raining that day, the car broke down, it's lady weeks,they have nerves, they aren't the people in the pics they showed you, an unexpected bill, the world cups on and a game he wanted to watch came on just as they were walking out the door , she couldn't find anything to wear, she ran out of Elizabeth Ardent blusher sacre bleu etc etcetera etcetera

"
Arden ffs

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Slow responses to msgs and , when meet agreed, not sharing mob number for txts( usually with a “ it’s my work phone” nonsense!!)

Not a chance in hell I'd give anyone off here my mobile number! "

Agree 100% with this, if you message via this site till the point of a meet then why would you need or want a phone number ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Honestly I think I have a solution to this no show problem....

Log on only when you’re looking to meet...

Horny people tend to want to have sex when they are horny....

I only meet last minute and never have this problem...

I get a email, I send my face pic and number, they call , We have a brief chat to establish boundaries, we meet and have sex...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Honestly I think I have a solution to this no show problem....

Log on only when you’re looking to meet...

Horny people tend to want to have sex when they are horny....

I only meet last minute and never have this problem...

I get a email, I send my face pic and number, they call , We have a brief chat to establish boundaries, we meet and have sex...

I’ve no doubt that’s a solution. But we are the complete opposite in the way we meet and play, and we’ve never had a no show either. I’m uncertain of what we do to prevent no shows, but it’s probably a combination of things that makes our Fab experience work.

Mrs

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By *issmorganWoman
over a year ago

Calderdale innit

I never talk on the phone, not even to jack as I hate it .

Only had 1 no show,stood me up for a social after pestering to meet,we had swapped numbers and he was verified ,so no way is 100 foolproof.

Sometimes you have to go with your instinct about someone I think,if it seems off it often is.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Slow responses to msgs and , when meet agreed, not sharing mob number for txts( usually with a “ it’s my work phone” nonsense!!)

Not a chance in hell I'd give anyone off here my mobile number!

Agree 100% with this, if you message via this site till the point of a meet then why would you need or want a phone number ?"

For us it turns a cyber communication into a real person. Once phone numbers are exchanged then I think people are psychologically communicating with a real person.

Mrs

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Just don’t understand why there’s so many no shows.

I know, I don’t get many messages (well from women) probably because I don’t have pics up but why say you’d meet if you have know intention of doing so. Is it the initial, thrill of the chase?

This, plus I think a lot of unhappily married/attached people like the feeling that they could pull someone attractive but are too scared to escape their unsatisfactory situation "

Good point, never thought of that.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I love how people have burner phones for Fab!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I love how people have burner phones for Fab!

In there heads they think they’re Jason Bourne.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It occurs to me that one of the most obvious signs that somebody is going to perform a "no show" for a meet is the way they respond to messages.

I noticed that when first contact is made they write back immediately. Respond very positively.

As the date agreed nears they dont respond as quickly. Then in the last days leading up to the meet they dont even open the messages.

At that point it is blindingly obvious they will not bother turning up.

Anyone noticed other clues?

I think you're right. Trust your gut too.

If they want sex chat before a meet they just want a wank and won't turn up. "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think there are many valid reasons for not sharing numbers including the risk of being hassled and pursued by people. The main attraction of the site is that it is a safe filter.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It occurs to me that one of the most obvious signs that somebody is going to perform a "no show" for a meet is the way they respond to messages.

I noticed that when first contact is made they write back immediately. Respond very positively.

As the date agreed nears they dont respond as quickly. Then in the last days leading up to the meet they dont even open the messages.

At that point it is blindingly obvious they will not bother turning up.

Anyone noticed other clues?"

A general unwillingness to engage in conversation via messages.

I give leeway because some people may be busy, but generally a lack of good, decent length messages makes me think the person will be a no show, or is unlikely to stay on the site

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By *ilk_TrayMan
over a year ago

South

I have a phone for friends and family. No one on here has that number.

But also have a PAYG phone for Fabs which I give out as the sim can always be replaced.

I like staying in touch with playmates whether on WhatsApp or Kik as messaging on here is not as instant, but that's me.

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By *heDesiCandiTV/TS
over a year ago

Hyderabad India and NOT in

Asking for a photo of how I am dressed when he should be walking into my room always amazes me

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By *abrielle247Couple (FF)
over a year ago

PDI Gran Canaria

Too much texting and asking for private pics and videos, wankers.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Couples/guys who ask you to describe what you are wearing, what your sexual fantasies are, want to can...have only one verification in two years...all red flags for us

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By *carlettxWoman
over a year ago

Essex

As soon as they start pushing for me to send Sex vids to which I reply no

The interest suddenly wears off Haha

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"As soon as they start pushing for me to send Sex vids to which I reply no

The interest suddenly wears off Haha "
I'd never ask you for a sex video......... Now create one that's another story

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By *issminxandmrcCouple
over a year ago

Rotherham

You look at their verification's & they are all "hidden!"

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By *issminxandmrcCouple
over a year ago

Rotherham

You look at their verification's & they are all "hidden!" as in the PPL that have verified them "very conveniently" have ALL hidden their profiles (as if EVERY one of them ,would have hidden their profiles at the same time LOL

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think one of the tell tale signs they may not ultimately turn up is they are reluctant to use their personal telephone number, I actually like to chat to the women I meet on phone first, gives me an idea of personality and whether we are likely to gel, I rarely do one off meets,that has worked well over time I've been doing this

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We’ve had two no shows. All was ok untill,,,, didn’t show up, both was single males

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We’ve had two no shows. All was ok untill,,,, didn’t show up, both was single males "
ooooo the dreaded single male

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think one of the tell tale signs they may not ultimately turn up is they are reluctant to use their personal telephone number, I actually like to chat to the women I meet on phone first, gives me an idea of personality and whether we are likely to gel, I rarely do one off meets,that has worked well over time I've been doing this

I won't give my number to someone I've never met but will happily call them withholding my number. I have never not turned up to an arranged meet, but there have been men I have spoken to on the phone who have cancelled at the last minute with some feeble excuse, so to me it's no indicator of reliability

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Bully for you!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Bully for you! "
thank-you

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By *ovingittwoCouple
over a year ago

Norwich

"We’ve never had a no-show. Contrary to most people’s approach, we are transparent and expect the same. Mobile numbers, face pics etc are exchanged. If someone is secretive our barriers go up. We respect that many have a very good reason for holding back, but a lot will hold back because they are not genuine. As we are uncertain as to how to tell the Mrs difference, it’s easier to stick with people who are also transparent. That’s our way of avoiding the bullshit that seems to be the norm for so many Fab users.

Mrs"

This is us too!

Mrs

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Mrs

This is us too!

Mrs"
and me but transparent maybe not open yes

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We’ve had two no shows. All was ok untill,,,, didn’t show up, both was single males ooooo the dreaded single male

Yep lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Day before yesterday was Canada day let's make today single male day......... Let's hear it for single men good lads just partnerless

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Also if you spend time getting to know somebody online if you do progress to meeting you avoid all the awkward silences as you have already gotten to know each other online.

Taking your time getting to know someobdy online first is my way to go. "

Likes and dislikes can be sorted quite quickly. It's not like you have to really know them to have a fuck. You can just say, for instance, no "pee, poo or punching"

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By *un Mike 2019Man
over a year ago

Bristol

It does annoy me, I’ve always been honest if something has come up but it’s happened maybe twice in the several years I’ve been on and off Fab and I’ve always rescheduled something in for the next night convenient. It’s also never happened with a first meet.

It’s a shame that so many guys seem to do this and then tarnish the rest of the single men profiles here.

I have also had women just not show, even thought they’ve just messaged to say “I’m in traffic, can we push it back a bit” and I’m sat in a coffee shop nursing my latte on my own lol.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It does annoy me, I’ve always been honest if something has come up but it’s happened maybe twice in the several years I’ve been on and off Fab and I’ve always rescheduled something in for the next night convenient. It’s also never happened with a first meet.

It’s a shame that so many guys seem to do this and then tarnish the rest of the single men profiles here.

I have also had women just not show, even thought they’ve just messaged to say “I’m in traffic, can we push it back a bit” and I’m sat in a coffee shop nursing my latte on my own lol. "

Minority spoils it for the majority they say

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's when they say they got lost and have no sat nav then u read next day they have been verified by someone else that winds me up,why not just say sorry got a better offer ,I know sometime it can be hard to see house numbers in the dark but get out the car and look at nearest one and if not sure message and check your on the right area,I always tell them what to look for IE car and what's on next doors drive

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By *otwife4hungCouple
over a year ago

Near Carlisle

Wow I wish I'd seen this before Saturday this is exactly what's just happened to us!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"This is the main one. It's why I tend to write a friendly message the day before saying I'm looking forward to meeting. If this doesn't get read or isn't replied to it's almost certain they'll be a no show "

That's what most guys say. But some chicken out

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By *he-Hosiery-GentMan
over a year ago

Older Hot Bearded Guy

"Not wanting to speak on the phone is a tell tale sign they are not genuine."

I steer towards getting them on a video call, rather than just a phone call, which tends to remove the need for a social, as it's just like being sat next to each other in a pub or similar, only you can't touch each other.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It occurs to me that one of the most obvious signs that somebody is going to perform a "no show" for a meet is the way they respond to messages.

I noticed that when first contact is made they write back immediately. Respond very positively.

As the date agreed nears they dont respond as quickly. Then in the last days leading up to the meet they dont even open the messages.

At that point it is blindingly obvious they will not bother turning up.

Anyone noticed other clues?profile hidden, not on as much but I like to get telephone number and speak on phone, that lowers odds

Mine is now hidden because I get too many messages... Do you want to fuck... Or time wasters. Whilst I've done that got the time shirt for wanting to speak on the phone most I've had to block because. Yes, they sex chatted me and to me that implores he only wants a quick fix.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'll never give my phone number to anyone here again and I have some veris that are hidden (am I supposed to show all 31 of them, including cams?), I chose to show the best ones, that's all. As for the phone number, I use kik instead as I've had problems in the past with a stalker. You live and learn.

Red flags for me are someone that keeps going on about photos and camming. I don't mind a quick one to show I'm real but nothing more. The tenses are important and yes, how they answer the messages. I also think that if they describe in a lot of details the meet, it's probably not going to happen. They just want to fantasize about it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 13/08/18 11:20:14]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'll never give my phone number to anyone here again and I have some veris that are hidden (am I supposed to show all 31 of them, including cams?), I chose to show the best ones, that's all. As for the phone number, I use kik instead as I've had problems in the past with a stalker. You live and learn.

Totally agree re mobile number - having been very badly stalked TWICE on Fab's it never a good idea - although I will exchange after a meet

Simple rules I follow re "spotting" is after initial chat in chat room (better place), ask to meet for drink public place - that usually sorts the dreamers and realist out - I think

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By *ap d agde coupleCouple
over a year ago

Broadstairs

We have never had a no show always used text by phone if you have a phone that’s not your main one what’s the problem?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Articulate well thought out messages get a response from us and if within a couple of days a meet is arranged all good, if not we move on, but if all good and meet arranged we stick to the following:-

No sex talk

No cam

No exchanging more pics

If hotel meet they book it we pay half at meet

If they take more than 24 hours to respond to a message near to meet date, we cancel

Never had a no show yet

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Slow responses to msgs and , when meet agreed, not sharing mob number for txts( usually with a “ it’s my work phone” nonsense!!)

Not a chance in hell I'd give anyone off here my mobile number!

We won't give our number out.

We now plan to get a cheap PAYG that will only be turned on for meets. "

Thats a good idea i used to give my number ended up getting calls in the middle of the night when they were d*unk i learned the hard way

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Slow response to or completely ignoring messages has always been my yardstick.

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By *riendly and hornyMan
over a year ago

Crewe

If the person only has one or two verifications, check the verifications of the people who verified them to see they have similar sketchy verifications.

I swear there's a network of fake verifiers out there.

It is a minefield!

Sorry for using the word verification so much

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Slow responses to msgs and , when meet agreed, not sharing mob number for txts( usually with a “ it’s my work phone” nonsense!!)

Not a chance in hell I'd give anyone off here my mobile number! "

I was thinking the same. I never give out my number on fab.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When they refuse to give a mobile number, .... they will not show. Also, lots of ping pong messages .... they will not show. When its a "couple" and you never get to "message" with the girl .... they will not show (or even worse, ... the guy WILL show). And, if the guy is trying to "encourage" his girl to swing, .... they will not show. Oh, and don't forget the couple with child/parent/pet etc reponsibilities ... they will not show. And then the wackos who "were on the way to meet you, but "the car broke down", "they got lost", "it was the wrong sort of rain", "one of them was taken suddenly ill", "they were abducted by aliens"... they will not show. I think that I've covered 99% Fab members .... that 99% will not show. But, occasionally they do show, and if you click, that's wonderful. Good luck.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"When they refuse to give a mobile number, .... they will not show. Also, lots of ping pong messages .... they will not show. When its a "couple" and you never get to "message" with the girl .... they will not show (or even worse, ... the guy WILL show). And, if the guy is trying to "encourage" his girl to swing, .... they will not show. Oh, and don't forget the couple with child/parent/pet etc reponsibilities ... they will not show. And then the wackos who "were on the way to meet you, but "the car broke down", "they got lost", "it was the wrong sort of rain", "one of them was taken suddenly ill", "they were abducted by aliens"... they will not show. I think that I've covered 99% Fab members .... that 99% will not show. But, occasionally they do show, and if you click, that's wonderful. Good luck."

Wow you’ve just quoted my meet history

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have to agree with the messaging one. That's without a doubt, the biggest red flag. Though I always consider that even the keen ones can be a no show. Shocking how many times one person can get lost

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Binoculars

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I have to agree with the messaging one. That's without a doubt, the biggest red flag. Though I always consider that even the keen ones can be a no show. Shocking how many times one person can get lost

I was beginning to think I might have been a mass murderer without knowing it; the amount of no shows whose nan died is alarming. There's one guy whose nan has passed away twice...poor old dear

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Slow responses to msgs and , when meet agreed, not sharing mob number for txts( usually with a “ it’s my work phone” nonsense!!)

Not a chance in hell I'd give anyone off here my mobile number!

We won't give our number out.

We now plan to get a cheap PAYG that will only be turned on for meets. "

Just remember to have it with you, unlike on a recent meet..

He did turn up..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I was beginning to think I might have been a mass murderer without knowing it; the amount of no shows whose nan died is alarming. There's one guy whose nan has passed away twice...poor old dear

I remember feeling like I was the kiss of death when I first started on fab. One mother, a gran, an uncle died in very short order and TWO wives who suddenly a) existed and b) had terminal diagnoses.

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By *iveshowcouple OP Couple
over a year ago

glasgow

I was beginning to think I might have been a mass murderer without knowing it; the amount of no shows whose nan died is alarming. There's one guy whose nan has passed away twice...poor old dear

I remember feeling like I was the kiss of death when I first started on fab. One mother, a gran, an uncle died in very short order and TWO wives who suddenly a) existed and b) had terminal diagnoses."

Lol

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By *ercurialMan
over a year ago

Maidenhead

"Not a chance in hell I'd give anyone off here my mobile number! "

I did (and the gesture was reciprocated). It worked out fine, you can always block people.

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By *ercurialMan
over a year ago

Maidenhead

"Just remember to have it with you, unlike on a recent meet.. "

Lol @tigerlily. Overexcited?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

=======================================

Damn, I forgot to add the "I got lost" excuse

I've had that one used on me too. Amazing that a couple can't find the only Hilton hotel in a city.

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By *atch_her_tooCouple
over a year ago

odiham

Experience, and that only comes with experience. Suspected `no shows` can sometimes be on time and be the best.

Those who play by all the communications rules, they give you email, mobile number and are happy to work round and arranged meet can sometimes be the ones who text 10 minutes before you are due to meet to tell you they are `chickening out` by whatever story they use at the time.

What is worse than a no show is being ghosted after meeting and having a good fucking session, not even a text to even say `not for me`.

Unfortunately it all goes with the territory.

With a few years under the belt you have heard it all.

The absolute worst though, eventually turned up, all was not arranged, place like a squat and then half way through had to take a cr*p.

You just have to learn to live with it and appreciate the real gentlemen, and ladies, out there who know how to give a girl a good time time and time again.

Rare but sometimes worth it..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Not wanting to speak on the phone is a tell tale sign they are not genuine."

We never chat on phone but still show. Each to their own and if don't trust us then that's their problem.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hmm. We give our number to all meets. Only had one no show but he was a regular anyway.

There is a block feature on most phones you know. If you don’t want someone calling just add their number to the block list. No need for a new phone or sim. "

We are the same but still don't share with everyone.

Gut feeling is the best.

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By *appytochatMan
over a year ago

Deep in the New Forest

Turn up late. If you can't see them them in advance then you know they didn't show up

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Slow responses to msgs and , when meet agreed, not sharing mob number for txts( usually with a “ it’s my work phone” nonsense!!)

Not a chance in hell I'd give anyone off here my mobile number! "

Same also work can delay our responces to messages.browsing asex site qhen you work with children and young people doesnt really mix well. X

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"One hidden verification raises alarm bells as well. Particular if is from ages back.

No it stays in our experience.

Pretty sure when people leave the site the verification, and in your summary, does completely too, have had it happen in the past. May be wrong..."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've been reading the responses with interest.

We've never had a no show but have experienced the keen messages fading as you realise they've moved on or had a wank. If we're all honest we've all done the same.

We do share WhatsApp or Kik as easy to block but only with those we feel are genuine.

Last min meets are difficult for us as we live in a remote area.

Go with your gut instinct

.... we've found it's the most reliable way of avoiding the tinewasters and dreamers.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's difficult really but generally they go silent the day before, that's why it's always good to have a number or to have spoken to them

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By *abrielle247Couple (FF)
over a year ago

PDI Gran Canaria

Easy, they chat to much and ask stupid questions and then disappear a couple of days before.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I was extremely suspicious of the most recent chap we were trying to meet.

He even supplied a mobile number, thank goodness I didn't ring it because it was 100% not his!

There are usually several signs of a No Show, we spot them from a mile off, particularly as we supply some discreet tests

Not sure why they do it, they are obvious, not clever and it gives the genuine Guy's a bad name/start to their endeavour!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It occurs to me that one of the most obvious signs that somebody is going to perform a "no show" for a meet is the way they respond to messages.

I noticed that when first contact is made they write back immediately. Respond very positively.

As the date agreed nears they dont respond as quickly. Then in the last days leading up to the meet they dont even open the messages.

At that point it is blindingly obvious they will not bother turning up."

Radio silence the closer you get to the date speaks volumes.

Thankfully I've never had a no show. The indicators are there if you care to take notice.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There's another sign... When you get into chat and nearer the time..what they are "into" suddenly changes..

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By *andlingswingersCouple
over a year ago

Woodbridge

"Slow responses to msgs and , when meet agreed, not sharing mob number for txts( usually with a “ it’s my work phone” nonsense!!)

Not a chance in hell I'd give anyone off here my mobile number! "

I will, partner definitely will not. And no way am I going to insist. Nobody needs a mobile number, KIK, Whatsapp or anything else. They just need to be honest with each other on Fabs.

Most people are. A few aren't and don't meet - but why would you want to meet people like that anyway?

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By *cottish guy 555Man
over a year ago

London

I cancelled a meet with a lady when she just got very slow at responding compared to how it was initially. Just something about it didn't feel right when I compared it to others.

Was probably worried over nothing and missed out on a great time

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By *innie The MinxWoman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet

The suddenly unread messages is the big red flag.

If they aren't reading your messages, they aren't into you and don't plan to meet.

Don't push it, just draw a line under it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Im glad someone sent me this link...i often thought id it just me that seems to pick the timewasting fuckers?

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By *bsolutebeginnersCouple
over a year ago

Planet Ork

We have child and pet responsibilities but we still show unlike yourselves as you’ve gone unlos!

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By *parksAbiWoman
over a year ago

Anywhere I like

"Just don’t understand why there’s so many no shows.

I know, I don’t get many messages (well from women) probably because I don’t have pics up but why say you’d meet if you have know intention of doing so. Is it the initial, thrill of the chase?

This, plus I think a lot of unhappily married/attached people like the feeling that they could pull someone attractive but are too scared to escape their unsatisfactory situation "

Yes agree with this

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By *parksAbiWoman
over a year ago

Anywhere I like

This is so true

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By *hingy2Woman
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

"It occurs to me that one of the most obvious signs that somebody is going to perform a "no show" for a meet is the way they respond to messages.

I noticed that when first contact is made they write back immediately. Respond very positively.

As the date agreed nears they dont respond as quickly. Then in the last days leading up to the meet they dont even open the messages.

At that point it is blindingly obvious they will not bother turning up.

Anyone noticed other clues?"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have never had a no show but that maybe because I arrange meets very quickly. If I arrange in advance I get so many messages that somebody else might start to tickle my fancy and the person I was going to meet I stop messaging in favour someone who will meet at the drop of a hat. I am a spontaneous kind of girl xxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It occurs to me that one of the most obvious signs that somebody is going to perform a "no show" for a meet is the way they respond to messages.

I noticed that when first contact is made they write back immediately. Respond very positively.

As the date agreed nears they dont respond as quickly. Then in the last days leading up to the meet they dont even open the messages.

At that point it is blindingly obvious they will not bother turning up.

Anyone noticed other clues?

They also change what they are into and back pedal a bit

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