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Do you have face pics?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

This is a question for those of us who don't have face pics public. When someone contacts you, and you chat for a bit, it often leads to them asking about meeting. At this point we often ask for a face pic (if they haven't yet been exchanged). I'm a believer that the first person who makes contact should provide a face pic.

Here is the question: if they send a face pic, and you don't fancy them, do you still feel obligated out of fairness to send one back? Just curious. Thanks for sharing your thoughts

-Courtney

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"This is a question for those of us who don't have face pics public. When someone contacts you, and you chat for a bit, it often leads to them asking about meeting. At this point we often ask for a face pic (if they haven't yet been exchanged). I'm a believer that the first person who makes contact should provide a face pic.

Here is the question: if they send a face pic, and you don't fancy them, do you still feel obligated out of fairness to send one back? Just curious. Thanks for sharing your thoughts

-Courtney"

I'll just tell them " sorry, not for me" and if they still ask for a face pic I just tell them that it'll be like rubbing salt into open wounds and make this a whole lot worse.....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We have a lot of guys (and some couples) that send a 'hi' message with a face pic and then expect 1 in return immediately!!

Once we've chatted for a while and a meet us on the cards then usually we agree to swap pics, in this instance we do send it even if not keen on there's x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No we don't send them back if we don't want to meet them. No point really xx

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By *hoenixcouplexxCouple
over a year ago

Leicestershire

If we know we are not going to meet them then there is no point in us sending face pics.

The worst is when you have to ask for face pics half a dozen messages in and then say no thanks.

Much easier if, like us people would just send them with the first or second message.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If they send a pic and they're not for me I don't send mine in return. No point.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If they've sent you a pic I think it's only fair to send one back, after all, you've asked them to trust you, so why shouldn't you do the same?

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago

I dont talk about anything close to arranging a meet until I've seen what they look like

If I've initiated the chat then I'll send a face pic,if they have they I expect them to,I also get face pic swapping out of the way pretty quickly

Saves any of us wasting each other time

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"If they've sent you a pic I think it's only fair to send one back, after all, you've asked them to trust you, so why shouldn't you do the same?"

I guess this illustrates my question. Very often I feel that if I'm not interested why should I bother sending one back. But then I wonder if I'm being unfair not reciprocating, even though it will go nowhere

But I also agree that if someone just sends there's in a message without being asked then there is no real obligation to return it. Just seems so confusing

-Courtney

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By *psidaisiMan
over a year ago

Halifax


"This is a question for those of us who don't have face pics public. When someone contacts you, and you chat for a bit, it often leads to them asking about meeting. At this point we often ask for a face pic (if they haven't yet been exchanged). I'm a believer that the first person who makes contact should provide a face pic.

Here is the question: if they send a face pic, and you don't fancy them, do you still feel obligated out of fairness to send one back? Just curious. Thanks for sharing your thoughts

-Courtney"

Do as you feel but in my opinion if you feel no connection there is no obligation to send one back the same as there is no obligation on meeting someone and not being attracted to have to still play with them.

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By *ENDAROOSCouple
over a year ago

South West London / Surrey

No we wouldn't send our face pic in return if we aren't interested in meeting.

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By *o new WinksMan
over a year ago

BSE

I usually send a face pic with my messages. I hide my face from casual scrutiny due to my job.

If I am messaging I have risk assessed informally and don't feel the need for secrecy.

Not sure my ugly mug in a message does me any good, but they need to see it sometime and the soo er the better.

I have no issue with rejection and like to get the formalities over before my imagination starts to get tickled

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago

oopps should have added we don't send one in return

what's the point in that

I can see it now...sorry you're not what we're looking for but here's us anyway

Thank fuck you said no you're a pair of fuglies and you've saved us the job of rejecting you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not really bothered about sending a face pic. The one we send to most can be found all over the book of face, Twitter and such like so it's not like we're sending state secrets.

If we receive one, we'll return the gesture even if it's just to put faces to names.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If they've sent you a pic I think it's only fair to send one back, after all, you've asked them to trust you, so why shouldn't you do the same?

I guess this illustrates my question. Very often I feel that if I'm not interested why should I bother sending one back. But then I wonder if I'm being unfair not reciprocating, even though it will go nowhere

"

I think it's just about the basic show of respect, you're simply saying 'you're not my cup of tea, but as you trusted me enough to show me your face, here's mine'.

I'm fortunate though that I've not had many chats with women on here whose faces I didn't like, perhaps there's just more minging guys on here than women.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If they've sent you a pic I think it's only fair to send one back, after all, you've asked them to trust you, so why shouldn't you do the same?

I guess this illustrates my question. Very often I feel that if I'm not interested why should I bother sending one back. But then I wonder if I'm being unfair not reciprocating, even though it will go nowhere

But I also agree that if someone just sends there's in a message without being asked then there is no real obligation to return it. Just seems so confusing

-Courtney"

You come across as a nice person.

Do what you feel is right. But not out of guilt. x

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By *umpleteazerWoman
over a year ago

Flintshire


"oopps should have added we don't send one in return

what's the point in that

I can see it now...sorry you're not what we're looking for but here's us anyway

Thank fuck you said no you're a pair of fuglies and you've saved us the job of rejecting you "

I've had exactly this so don't send one with a no thank you now. I am aware I'm not perfect so don't need people who are feeling rejected to point out that I'm a fat ugly cow lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"If they've sent you a pic I think it's only fair to send one back, after all, you've asked them to trust you, so why shouldn't you do the same?

I guess this illustrates my question. Very often I feel that if I'm not interested why should I bother sending one back. But then I wonder if I'm being unfair not reciprocating, even though it will go nowhere

But I also agree that if someone just sends there's in a message without being asked then there is no real obligation to return it. Just seems so confusing

-Courtney

You come across as a nice person.

Do what you feel is right. But not out of guilt. x"

Thank you

And I don't think it's really guilt that I feel. More a question of what others do.

-Courtney

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By *ouble_The_DelightCouple
over a year ago

Wakefield

We exchanged face pictures very early if we intend to meet if we don,t like the look of them then we say message to say that we will not be taking things any further.

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By *lorious hole bs16Man
over a year ago

Bristol

I don't have face pics for obvious reasons..anonymity is the key.

I also don't really worry about what they look like as it's not the face I am fucking!

Gimme an ugly man with a nice dick over a good looking one with an average cock every time..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I try to exchange a face pic earlier just find it easier. Nothing worse that really liking someone's personality but finding there's no attraction at all xx

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By *roffGentlemanMan
over a year ago

Bolton

We feel there's no obligation in replying with a face pic if your not interested in meeting. You send your face pic on your own behest as we do.

Blimey there's lots to this swinging etiquette lark eh?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I send a face pic if asked 99% of the time.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Only send when ready. Most that want a face pic with first message are either a bloke pretending to be a woman or couple, someone that doesn't care about privacy or someone so shallow they judge a book by a cover and not worth merting....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"This is a question for those of us who don't have face pics public. When someone contacts you, and you chat for a bit, it often leads to them asking about meeting. At this point we often ask for a face pic (if they haven't yet been exchanged). I'm a believer that the first person who makes contact should provide a face pic.

Here is the question: if they send a face pic, and you don't fancy them, do you still feel obligated out of fairness to send one back? Just curious. Thanks for sharing your thoughts

-Courtney"

I wouldn't send a face pic to someone that I didn't think there was a chance of meeting

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Newly uploaded one was public for 10 mins. Oops!

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By *roffGentlemanMan
over a year ago

Bolton


"Only send when ready. Most that want a face pic with first message are either a bloke pretending to be a woman or couple, someone that doesn't care about privacy or someone so shallow they judge a book by a cover and not worth merting.... "

Yep that's us, shallow people not worth merting

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"This is a question for those of us who don't have face pics public. When someone contacts you, and you chat for a bit, it often leads to them asking about meeting. At this point we often ask for a face pic (if they haven't yet been exchanged). I'm a believer that the first person who makes contact should provide a face pic.

Here is the question: if they send a face pic, and you don't fancy them, do you still feel obligated out of fairness to send one back? Just curious. Thanks for sharing your thoughts

-Courtney"

I ask for a face pic with a first message, if they don't send one and I can't see a public one I reply asking for one and if I receive one and I like the look of them, I send one back but if not, I decline and don't send one

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This happens to me a lot, last night for example, a couple wanted a meet but just had a pussey pic, they saw my pic, its like the expect to meet them without even sending a face pic? I came up with an excuse not to meet lol.

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By *ecktheHallsCouple
over a year ago

Near Leeds xx

We have face pics in our private pics, and any of our friends can view them. We only accept friend invites or invite people that we would like to meet. Ensuring people are verified, have similar meeting likes and dislaikes, and having chatted a little with them. Once they have ticked those boxes, we are happy to view our ugly mugs and run for the hills. x

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By *ast_jjMan
over a year ago

Dublin

I like to send a face pic early so the person or couple I am chatting to can see what I look like. I do like to get one back as it helps if I can see who I'm chatting to. If after I send my face pic they say thanks but no thanks, I just say fair enough and good luck. J

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Only send when ready. Most that want a face pic with first message are either a bloke pretending to be a woman or couple, someone that doesn't care about privacy or someone so shallow they judge a book by a cover and not worth merting....

Yep that's us, shallow people not worth merting "

Damn my poor spelling, dont judge me further....

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By *o_added_sugarWoman
over a year ago

A club not so many miles away

I send a face pic if asked and I'm usually greeted with silence. The messages stop and conversation over. No discussion that I'm not their type, they just don't message back. I'm I offended? No I'd much prefer that then a come back saying that I'm not their type. I've already guessed that, got the message, I won't be bothering you again. I do leave a private note on their profile so I know if they speak to me again though.

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By *ast_jjMan
over a year ago

Dublin


"We exchanged face pictures very early if we intend to meet if we don,t like the look of them then we say message to say that we will not be taking things any further."
A sensible approach.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes but only in private, so that we can send any time we feel we need to. We don't put them in public/friends. We feel there is enough on our profile to show people who/what we are, and face pics are always available if its the right thing to do (i.e. we have an aim to meet). We simply can't put them in public is all. C x

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By *roffGentlemanMan
over a year ago

Bolton


"Only send when ready. Most that want a face pic with first message are either a bloke pretending to be a woman or couple, someone that doesn't care about privacy or someone so shallow they judge a book by a cover and not worth merting....

Yep that's us, shallow people not worth merting

Damn my poor spelling, dont judge me further.... "

Only messing with ya x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Only send when ready. Most that want a face pic with first message are either a bloke pretending to be a woman or couple, someone that doesn't care about privacy or someone so shallow they judge a book by a cover and not worth merting....

Yep that's us, shallow people not worth merting

Damn my poor spelling, dont judge me further....

Only messing with ya x "

Likewise......or was I?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Im quite the opposite i prefer people to see my face pic before anything else thats why my face pic is public and everthing else is private but i can understand why people put there face pics as private. But if people take one look at my face and say no thank you then i dont push and i dont push for people to share there face pics untill as such point as they are happy with my face pic and decide they would like to go that one step further

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

This is all really interesting to me. I always thought people would be annoyed to have sent out a face pic and not gotten one back. But most of you are saying the opposite. Interesting

-Courtney

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think if we're all being honest physical attraction is key and face pics are essential for establishing whether there is any attraction there or not. If someone sends you a face pic and you don't fancy them, it would just be wasting everybody's time to drag out the contact, as it won't head anywhere.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Physical attraction is one thing but can be overcome by being attracted to a persons personality, too. That's why yes, faces do play a role for us, but we are more interested in what kind of people they are. What's the point in playing with somebody who you just cannot get on with and can't even have a laugh with! C x

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By *roffGentlemanMan
over a year ago

Bolton

All we know is that when we send Mr Shreks face pic, people have a good laugh

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By *ecktheHallsCouple
over a year ago

Near Leeds xx

Exactly our thoughts, and it is why we like to chat/message/read profiles and look at pics (non face) before we accept people. From that point we have worked out if we are attracted to them, and if they have faces to match it is a bonus.

We are happy to share our face pics with our friends, as we only accept/invite those we feel are right for us.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We don't send face pics.ever.and we make that clear on our profile,that way it's up to others if they want to get in contact.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not getting one back is fine,but I do wish people would delete it for privacy reassurance .

No reply is a perfect indication of no thanks,but when you've trusted someone with a face pic,it's a little disconcerting when it's left in their inbox.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"This is a question for those of us who don't have face pics public. When someone contacts you, and you chat for a bit, it often leads to them asking about meeting. At this point we often ask for a face pic (if they haven't yet been exchanged). I'm a believer that the first person who makes contact should provide a face pic.

Here is the question: if they send a face pic, and you don't fancy them, do you still feel obligated out of fairness to send one back? Just curious. Thanks for sharing your thoughts

-Courtney

I'll just tell them " sorry, not for me" and if they still ask for a face pic I just tell them that it'll be like rubbing salt into open wounds and make this a whole lot worse..... "

Hahaha quality "rubbing salt in to a open wound" lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"

I ask for a face pic with a first message, if they don't send one and I can't see a public one I reply asking for one and if I receive one and I like the look of them, I send one back but if not, I decline and don't send one"

Same. I think it's wasting time to send a pic to someone I've established is not appealing to me.

I wouldn't be bothered if someone did the same to me.

I can't imagine even considering meeting someone without seeing their face :O

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


" Not getting one back is fine,but I do wish people would delete it for privacy reassurance .

No reply is a perfect indication of no thanks,but when you've trusted someone with a face pic,it's a little disconcerting when it's left in their inbox."

I noticed you can delete your mugshots any from an email after you've sent. The nice, thoughtful people at fab have thought of that one. That is unless it's a site supporters feature only so apologies if I got that wrong. You can also automatically delete after it's been read if you like.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"

I ask for a face pic with a first message, if they don't send one and I can't see a public one I reply asking for one and if I receive one and I like the look of them, I send one back but if not, I decline and don't send one

Same. I think it's wasting time to send a pic to someone I've established is not appealing to me.

I wouldn't be bothered if someone did the same to me.

I can't imagine even considering meeting someone without seeing their face :O"

God no, urgh

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By *nFairnessMan
over a year ago

The Four Corners

I have face pics up because of this dilemma... And if someone I know asks me about it.. I'll tell them the truth...

I have face pictures up for other people to masturbate over.

Hehe jokes aside, tell them the truth and either they shut up or ask me whether they should join...

The odd strange look but that's about it.

Lol :P not one for caring about other peoples thoughts or opinions on my life. unless of course I ask for it.

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