FabSwingers.com forum: REALIATY strikes!!!!!!

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Right after reading the forums time and time again reading about tenderness and how fab it is, holding her head in his hands.....

wanting to have a lover rather than a shag!!!!!!

HELLO PEEPS this is a SWINGING SITE its all about the sex... if you want love tenderness there are dating sites out there

and yes i am the fem half !!!!!

its time ppl seperated shaggs from emmotions!!!!!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Each to their own, and enjoy your shags!

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By *drianukMan
over a year ago

Spain, Lancs

Many people - me included - just want horny sex. It means no disrespect to anyone, we just like sex

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By *histler21Man
over a year ago

Ipswich

Unless someone is cold, calculated and ruthless - there will always be an element of emotion in sex. We are, after all, emotional beings.

I'd hate to think that I felt nothing for a woman if we are sharing some intimate moments.

Granted, it's unlikely that I or anyone would form a long-lasting, close relationship - but I know these sorts of things can and do happen.

And I don;t mind admitting that care and sensuality are important to me in sex. I see it as an aspect of my personality that like to make people feel very wanted in those moments we have together.

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By *awty_MissDynomiteNo1Woman
over a year ago

No idea, I'm lost. Damn Sat nav!

i dont think a bit of passion while enjoying a shag is all that bad really i think its very nice indeed would rather feel the person im with is with me because he wants to be rather than just because im just another shag .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

its time ppl seperated shaggs from emmotions!!!!!!!

It'll happen when people learn to spell.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Thats all well and good coming from the female half of a couple, you can do the swing thing then be intimate and loving when you're alone. But what about single people on here? Are you saying we're not entitled to some affection and tenderness? Because if I met a man that just fucked then he wouldn't get within an inch of me.

In fact I'm sick of hearing this. Yes this is a swinging site. Yes its about sex. But swinging is an extremely sociable activity and I refuse point blank to leave my emotions at home thank you very much.

However, this is your point of view and you're entitled to it

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By *ensual temptressWoman
over a year ago

Southampton

yep its swinging site but not a meat market ! if ppl want more substance than just being a means to scratch an itch then that is THEIR choice and what they feel comfortable with . alternatly if ppl want to get a shag asap with whoever then thats THEIR choice and what they are comfortable with ! who has they right to say ones right way or wrong way ? it its right for you then thats what matters .

just because its a swing site doesnt mean we comprimise our standerds and own preferences and comform to what ever anyone else happens to deem acceptable . some ppl like one niters and spur of the moment meets ,others perfer to get to know a person and have regular meets ...neither is more valid than the other .they are just what THAT indervidual is wanting and comfortable with ,and everyones bounderies and requirments should be respected .if you dont agree with the way that persons swings then dont message em and just move on to someone with same out look as your own .

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

passion is a fine whilst having sex but when you start bringing emotion into it then thats where we draw the line, how many women would like there partner during a meet to whisper sweet nothings and hold the other so close and sensuallly?????

not many i bet

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Brilliantly put Tenderness.

I've tried the regular dating sites but have always been wary about which stage of a new relationship I tell the guy I like to swing (even if it is only now & again as a treat). So I came to Fab. And if Fiona happens to find her Shrek on here then thats my concern!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No I understand that. I've swung as a couple and on one meet the woman got a bit to sensual with my fella and quite frankly I wanted to scratch her eyes out. Therefore its different for a couple than it is a single. Point taken.

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By *ensual temptressWoman
over a year ago

Southampton

"passion is a fine whilst having sex but when you start bringing emotion into it then thats where we draw the line, how many women would like there partner during a meet to whisper sweet nothings and hold the other so close and sensuallly?????

not many i bet "

id like to know how you have sex with out being close and sensual lol !!! if partner isnt comfortable with their other half being intimate with someone else then they shouldnt be swinging lol !!

no one said anything about whispering sweet nothings and personally if a guy wants to whisper how good sommething feels or that i smell or taste good ..whats the issue with that ??lol ! my hubby would be happy i was being treated as a WOMEN and with respect ,not as a replacement for a guys right hand .

just because people connect not just on a sexual level doesnt mean they are gonna leave their partner and run off ! adults on here im sure can separate a friendship with benifits from a full blowen relationship .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Dating sites are no good, there’s too much sex happens on them

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By *harpDressed ManMan
over a year ago

Here occasionally, but mostly somewhere else

I care about my friends' wellbeing and general happiness.

I see people I swing with as friends.

Therefore I have a low-level emotional connection with them, which hopefully is reciprocated and which hopefully therefore leads to better sex.

The level of coldness implied by the "just shagging" point of view - I feel warmer towards coworkers than that! But maybe, as said above, it's a necessity for couples.

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By *oe_Steve_NWestCouple
over a year ago

Bolton

"Right after reading the forums time and time again reading about tenderness and how fab it is, holding her head in his hands.....

wanting to have a lover rather than a shag!!!!!!

HELLO PEEPS this is a SWINGING SITE its all about the sex... if you want love tenderness there are dating sites out there

and yes i am the fem half !!!!!

its time ppl seperated shaggs from emmotions!!!!!!!

Where are all these threads about tenderness? I think I noticed one a bit ago? I think most of us know what the site is about and the vast majority know the difference between a dating site and a site for swingers! We certainly aren't looking for love here but come on - there needs to be an element of attraction and chemistry (well obviously not for some!). Shag and go? OK for some but not for us! Z

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"yep its swinging site but not a meat market ! if ppl want more substance than just being a means to scratch an itch then that is THEIR choice and what they feel comfortable with . alternatly if ppl want to get a shag asap with whoever then thats THEIR choice and what they are comfortable with ! who has they right to say ones right way or wrong way ? it its right for you then thats what matters .

Well put and I couldn't agree more.

Seems like someone feels a little insecure and threatened to me.

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

"Right after reading the forums time and time again reading about tenderness and how fab it is, holding her head in his hands.....

wanting to have a lover rather than a shag!!!!!!

HELLO PEEPS this is a SWINGING SITE its all about the sex... if you want love tenderness there are dating sites out there

and yes i am the fem half !!!!!

its time ppl seperated shaggs from emmotions!!!!!!!

I think it depends on what type of meet it is.

For us, we don't want any emotions to come into play with any people we meet. I (mrs) would be uncomfortable if someone was acting like a B/F when we had a meet......but on the other hand I wouldn't want a fuck and go scenario.

We have it just right with how we meet.......we meet men , sometimes more than once, we have fun without any emotions and all go home happy. We are only in touch with people when we all want to meet and we keep our life seperate to this fun.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

not many i bet "

wouldnt mind my partner whispering sweet nothings etc as if that makes the lady feel special than hes doing a good job.....anyway I know he will be coming home with me at the end of the night and that matters more to me!!!

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By *ruitWoman
over a year ago

near kings lynn

Pinky fair enough you are a couple if I read it right.

I am a single and posted about tenderness as I was the one that experienced it.

When I am with a man it can be tender, rushed, frantic, touching, gentle and lots of other things but the one thing it isnt and that is love.

I use lots of emotions when meeting a person,excitement hesitation.....and so many others.

Sorry but I wont meet unless there is some emotion with it. I am not a machine.

If a lady does something tender it can be called sensual (mind you so can men), are you saying that tenderness is different from being sensual?

In a couple it is different but when I meet couples I will still be me and have sex and foreplay in the way I do. I havent had many complaints and that has come from the couples too.

I am no machine and wont have sex as one.

I am on a dating site to date and hopefully find love. I am on this site for sex, not, I repeat love as I dont expect or look to find it on here.

I have been doing this for a number of years now and am quite happy with the way I do things.

Just thought, tesco is for shopping not for dating but you never kbnow when you may meet the man or woman of your dreams there. People dont go to tesco to meet someone special, they go to shop.

This site is for swinging and not for dating. I swing on here and come on for that reason. Doesnt mean that I or any other person may not meet the one for them. Its the fact that I know precisely what I come here for and am certainly not confused with what I get from where.

it sounds as if a few posters on here are more concerned with how a single woman or a single man may behave with their wife or husband withing a couple. A poster said they were not goona have it if a single joined them and cradled their partners face and maybe were tender/sensual in their kisses when the moment was right. That tells me that person has insecurites in their relationship. Maybe that couple should just meet metal robots as swingign is about emotion and feeling and chemistry and mutual fun. My heart is never there with the meet but some emotions are certainly there.

Hope all of that makes sence. Spelling probably not tho lol.

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By *ruitWoman
over a year ago

near kings lynn

Ps I never swing when dating. As that to me is wrong and have swung far far longer than have dated as dating hasnt given me what I needed and swinging has

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Fruit, you say that you're on a dating site as well as on here. Can I ask you, if you met a man on the dating site would you tell him that you swing? And if so, when is the right time? Would you want him to join you?

I'm curious as I'm also on a dating site but never told anyone!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A good Shag should always leave you feeling Tender ....

Kirsty

xxx xxx

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By *ruitWoman
over a year ago

near kings lynn

Yes is the answer. I have only dated about 4 men in the last 5 years and only one has been for a decent amount of time ie 9 months or so. I have always been very honest with everyone I have met and never have had anyone rush off in a panic when I have told them.

I would only ever swing if he wanted to do it as a couple. I am bi so would even give up the female touch for the right man but in all honesty I adore being with women and not sure how I would not need or want the female touch.

But I have always told the man if he or I was planning a second date to get to know them more.

I am one of those pretty honest women as swinging is who I am and not something I am ashamed of.

Hope that helps xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Why does it have to be about shags? Or about tenderness? Or even about shaggs!

Swinging can mean different things to different people, as can so many other things, its why we write profiles so that we can portray the things that interest us and what swinging means to that individual or couple.

Is one view right and another wrong?

Peace out!

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By *umourCouple
over a year ago

Rushden

We have had a few really good meets over the years and all of the good ones have had one thing in common. The other guy treated Mrs R with care and tenderness! They have whispered things in her ear that have seemed to bring them closer together at that moment, but 12 years later, we are still together, madly in love and swinging.

I would feel remiss in my duty to the other lady if I didn't try to give her the best time i could. That to me inludes a certain amount of sensual closeness, neck kissing, snogging and whispering between us! One lady from a couple who we have played with on a number of occasions and I are giggling most of the evening. We are playing, giggling, snogging and generally having a sensuous time, but she goes home with hubby and everyone is happy!

Sorry to say this, but there seems to be some insecurity in this thread!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

no insecurity this side all i was saying before it got took all out of context, was that the forums started to read more like a mills n boon novel. When in fact it is nothing at all like that. You can display mutual respect and we often do i may add for each others partner this doesnt mean as some of people seem to have the wrong end of the stick it is just a fuck and go. Just think (in my opinion) that some people may be looking for a little more on here than some and for the single peeps gr8 enjoy have a ball.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

god get a hobby if all u can do is complain about other people and what they do

big deal, she wrote about how nice and unusual it was, she wasnt online looking for wedding dresses once he left the house!

sometimes as someone said some people enjoy not being treated as a piece of meat but it doesnt mean they looking for "the one" and those odd wee tender moments can come as a bit of a surprise . they not my cuppa tea but thats just me and if someone finds the ying to their yang through here and they all consenting adults then who really gives a shit!!

as long as i get an invite to the wedding i hate to miss a chance to buy new clothes! x

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By *ouplefunukCouple
over a year ago

North Bristol

I guess there's a line and that line varies for different people.

My last meet was on the wrong side of the line for my liking. No kissing and he didn't even look at the mantelpiece whilst he was stoking the fire!

I was a bit offended if i'm honest.

*Her*

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By *oe_Steve_NWestCouple
over a year ago

Bolton

"Right after reading the forums time and time again reading about tenderness and how fab it is, holding her head in his hands.....

wanting to have a lover rather than a shag!!!!!!

HELLO PEEPS this is a SWINGING SITE its all about the sex... if you want love tenderness there are dating sites out there

and yes i am the fem half !!!!!

its time ppl seperated shaggs from emmotions!!!!!!!

What exactly are you trying to tell us though? Z

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By *ruitWoman
over a year ago

near kings lynn

"no insecurity this side all i was saying before it got took all out of context, was that the forums started to read more like a mills n boon novel. When in fact it is nothing at all like that. You can display mutual respect and we often do i may add for each others partner this doesnt mean as some of people seem to have the wrong end of the stick it is just a fuck and go. Just think (in my opinion) that some people may be looking for a little more on here than some and for the single peeps gr8 enjoy have a ball.

I assume that is a pop at me as I started the unexpected tenderness thread.

You do not know me from adam or what I am looking for. I am not looking for that special one on here, if you think I am then tough titties as you know sweet zero about me.

I am on a dating site to meet someone special but know full well that my happy ever after is unlikely to happen due to circumstances which naturally you know nout about.

I am still having to keep in touch with the lying ex so believe me I am in no rush to meet mr right and nor have I been for the last 5 years.The swinging has made me some amazing friends and have met some lovely couples who are also not robots.

If you knew me from a different site you would know I have met probably as many couples as single men. If I was out to find a man on here, I would be only meeting single men. In fact at the moment I am desperately missing the femal touch. And that is one that has feeling attatched. Remember that is part of emotion.

It would have to be one hell of a man to make me alter my life and that includes the swinging.

I am not a machine and nor will I act like one.I choose to seek more than just mutual respect in a meet, I want tenderness then lust and desperate sex and all of those take emotion.

Just suggesting that you maybe dont comment on what you dont know. Get to know me, what I have been through and then and only then comment on what you think "some people" are looking for.

If that isnt all directed at me then I have read it wrong and apologise. Nobody knows what I want except for the close friends on here and my previous site that do know me.

But dont ever think you know what I or others may be looking for.

Give me emotion anyday, I dont want to live without emotion and everything it is connected with as I am not a machine.

Anyway, I stopped reading mills and boon with all its boredom and have been ready more saucy novels with loads of sex and lust involved. Do you get the picture?

Sex, fun, lust and respect for me all the way. Not love, love, love.

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By *obblybitsCouple
over a year ago

huddersfield

people should be able to use this site as they wish and from reading around and through chatting to people a fare few relationships and married has come from meets on fab and other sites.

I really like to hear ov people having a bit more than fuck and go. I don't think we have had enough meets to say a preference as most of our meets have been in clubs on the of chance or meeting.

i also thing the people who use the forums are only a tiny amount of people who actually use fab daily so in no way is the forums are putting ideas out about lovy dovy meets.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

its time ppl seperated shaggs from emmotions!!!!!!!

It'll happen when people learn to spell."
its me crap spelling , whats going to happen nothing just get on peoples tits now and again ,, lol. And to the lovely lady who has posted this. Dont give up on your dreams ,,, theres are shaggers out there and real lovers xxxxx hope you will find what your looking for x jo xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i can be very sensual when i want to be and i can shag when i want to...and emotions don't come into it either way. even when i am being attentive with someone, i can still carry on with my life after. i don't cry the minute they leave or sit on my phone waiting for the call.

i don't have a script for sex and it's never been the same twice. i am not by nature a cold person, however, i feel like i am free to be tender as i know i dont want a relationship and i'm happy with that and it's a message i relay to whoever i'm with.

and there are folk that have met on here and gotten into a relationship and still use the site as a couple...are they phony swingers or genuine? did they mis-use this site?

each to their own

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By *ruitWoman
over a year ago

near kings lynn

its time ppl seperated shaggs from emmotions!!!!!!!

It'll happen when people learn to spell.its me crap spelling , whats going to happen nothing just get on peoples tits now and again ,, lol. And to the lovely lady who has posted this. Dont give up on your dreams ,,, theres are shaggers out there and real lovers xxxxx hope you will find what your looking for x jo xx"

Thanks Jo, but am pretty jaded when it comes to men now hence why swinging works so well for me. Cant imagine being with one man now as need the female touch so much too. As I said before you never know where you will meet someone but will take some convincing me that it will happen on here.

So now I am planning my next meet and cant wait.

We all do like to dream but reality has normally a bigger effect on my life lol.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Thats all well and good coming from the female half of a couple, you can do the swing thing then be intimate and loving when you're alone. But what about single people on here? Are you saying we're not entitled to some affection and tenderness? Because if I met a man that just fucked then he wouldn't get within an inch of me.

However, this is your point of view and you're entitled to it

Whilst swinging is not just about sex, for us we have to be close to a couple and by that i mean we have to be able to chat and have fun and laugh together because we indulge in play. But as to the comment on "arent us single people allowed to have tenderness and closeness" then not really, not with someone elses guy and not with me either. After we play with another couple my guy will be tender with me and not the people hes played with cos its just play - its not about tenderness.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

this is the reason i no longer play with couples - the male half is never allowed to be "tender" as the female half doesnt like it, therefore, i ended up feeling like some sort of "thing" for their use. im not a machine, im not only their for your pleasure and i do have thoughts and feelings.

i much prefer the equal footing of meeting single men where there is a mututal understanding and yeah, shag me all over the place but you know what? if we're both on the same page and theres affection and a cuddle before during and after, then thats great. its not a declaration of love or a proposal of marriage.

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By *ansue35Couple
over a year ago

yorkshire

"this is the reason i no longer play with couples - the male half is never allowed to be "tender" as the female half doesnt like it, therefore, i ended up feeling like some sort of "thing" for their use. im not a machine, im not only their for your pleasure and i do have thoughts and feelings.

I (sue) do not mind Ian been tender, In fact if I thought he was not ! Then I would say that he's been a prick, given a right ticking off.

I know he coming home with me. ( ok I have to drive him back LOL)

But I see the tender side as be nice, because anyone having a shag with another person is being personal.

Sue

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

ok peeps it seems a lot have not read the origional thread ,

this was all about singles who love tenderness while having meets and couples like us who want a hot sexual night without the thought that the other cpls partners was wispering sweet nothings while having sex and making it more than just a sexual encounter. if you want the tenderness and to watch your husband and wife make love to a stranger then fine ENJOY. if like us you want and find it horny to watch your partner have SEX then his or her partners to be emotionaly attached just because they are having sex .

re spelling if i only had one leg would you call me a cripple?.

get a life over the punctuation

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"But as to the comment on "arent us single people allowed to have tenderness and closeness" then not really, not with someone elses guy and not with me either. After we play with another couple my guy will be tender with me and not the people hes played with cos its just play - its not about tenderness. "

of course, as sinlge women well know, we just provide the orifice for couples to use!

i'd say it's an insecure couple that have a ban on kissing and touching in any manner other than to guide the cock in...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I (sue) do not mind Ian been tender, In fact if I thought he was not ! Then I would say that he's been a prick, given a right ticking off.

I know he coming home with me. ( ok I have to drive him back LOL)

But I see the tender side as be nice, because anyone having a shag with another person is being personal.

Sue

*applauds*

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

of course, as sinlge women well know, we just provide the orifice for couples to use!

i'd say it's an insecure couple that have a ban on kissing and touching in any manner other than to guide the cock in..."

What would you say about our situation were the husband says I can do what I want with the men we play with, but I like the play as SEX and not making love?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

of course, as sinlge women well know, we just provide the orifice for couples to use!

i'd say it's an insecure couple that have a ban on kissing and touching in any manner other than to guide the cock in...

What would you say about our situation were the husband says I can do what I want with the men we play with, but I like the play as SEX and not making love?"

he's not told you to not be affectionate with someone, you've made thsat decision.

when i first joined the site i did talk to couples, but the list of does and dont's made me feel like i was going to be a spare wheel in their play, and it was always about the play between me and the male half; the female, it seems, was always no holds barred, we could do what we want. nothing about my choices or my needs was ever discussed. it's not my choice to be excluded by a couple if i'm going to be joining them, so i chose to remove the couples option from my profile.

i recognise it is not all couples that act this way, the couple above don't, but my response was to the lady that said a single woman had no right to tenderness. NO RIGHT. my choice would be to not exercise my right to meet a couple like that, i would rather meet the other couple that said that sex is an intimate thing so would expect it.

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By *ruitWoman
over a year ago

near kings lynn

I wonder to those who have said no to tenderness and whispeing sweet nothings would say no to the lust and hard and fast F**k. Because lust and frantic sex shows a massive amaount of passion. I wonder if passion is allowed or is that not acceptable??

What is more threatening (or whatever you call it), tenderness or passion. As both are feelings and emotions. Tenderness carries a thoughfulness side in my books, showing sensitivity and passion is massive chemistry and lust and an element of needing it so bad the touch is not probably going to be gentle. These are 2 opposite ends of the scale to me.

So what do the couples think, who have said they dont like the tenderness side(their partner giving it or receiving it from us awful single women(tongue in cheek)

Is it worse or different or the same but on opposing scale as I guess I see it.

It is a serious question.

I am suddenly wondering if the way I have met couples in the last 4 and half years is threatening to the couple.

I have had a number of second and third meets (and more) from couples so dont think I am getting it wrong but suddenly wonder about all the females of the couples if they are disliking maybe the way I have sex with them and their partner.

This thread has really opened my eyes and now really curious as to the whys and wherefores.

I have only ever once been in a dating relationship where we have swung as a real couple. Not for very long I add but we did have a few meets as a couple.

At the end of the evening it has been lovely to know the other couple(well the male) had gone home and it was me and my partner(male) and a very very good female friend snuggled up in bed all night.

It was a saucy horny evening in a MFF but when she went home it was just us two again and I know that was great.

Do the females of the couple maybe read into it more than the males about what has happened?

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By *ruitWoman
over a year ago

near kings lynn

Ps I commented on my spelling as when typing something that has got me annoyed or passionate about something my fi ngers begin to type faster and its normally someone who then comments on how bad the grammar or spelling is.

I was pointing out that the spelling was probably bad before anyone else did xx

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

of course, as sinlge women well know, we just provide the orifice for couples to use!

i'd say it's an insecure couple that have a ban on kissing and touching in any manner other than to guide the cock in...

What would you say about our situation were the husband says I can do what I want with the men we play with, but I like the play as SEX and not making love?

he's not told you to not be affectionate with someone, you've made thsat decision.

I understood why you said it, as you sort of explained in your first post about the couples you had met before. I was just intrigued at the comment of , there must be insecurity issues if people don't have any emotion in their play.

I know we are not really in the scenarios of the posts on this thread involving other couples etc, but I was just pointing out, it is my preferences that I choose to do , so I am guessing most other people do the same, whatever their preferences.

On another note, I really don't think anyone should be swinging if they have any insecurities or unhealthy jealousy about what their other half is doing. It defeats the object of swinging within couples if you really don't like to share.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I agree f###. The lot of yous, and take that the way you want to

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I understood why you said it, as you sort of explained in your first post about the couples you had met before. I was just intrigued at the comment of , there must be insecurity issues if people don't have any emotion in their play.

which is the crux of it, if it is a choice, then it's a totally different scenario, but to say that a single woman has no right is just the worst thing i think i've ever read. it may not be for them as a couple and they have a right to that and there will be single women or couples that may feel the same and they are all there in agreement chosing that method of intimacy (or lack thereof), but to say that someone has no right....just bit me tbh, i have every right to decide if i want or don't want tenderness and i won't enforce my needs or rules on anyone else, but will seek to find someone that wants the same as me.

i also believe that there is nothing on this earth that is more intimate than sex, so it seems a little strange to say "you cant hold his/her face...but you can....[insert act of sexual nature]"

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

Ah well I agree with that bit, you have a right to have your own preferences, and as you say, can avoid anyone who thinks you should play their way only.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

ok this is the male perspective from p and p

i dont want to meet a cpl and have my partner mrs P BEING TOLD THAT SHE IS THE LOVE OF HIS LIFE AND THAT HE CANT COPE WITHOUT ever seeing her again while he is with her. IF i allowed that senario i would be a cuckold ...which im not . what i DO WANT is to see mrs p have a great time having sex with a guy who respects her but dosent want to keep her or fall in love with her just because we allow him to be close and sensual with her. we are on this site NOT to use fems or males as meat but just for horny sex without the EMOTIONS ATTACHED is this so hard to grasp.

ok as far a singles meeting cpl we have never asked or done this . if we did we would have to change our perspective and allow a certain amount of tenderness, but at the moment its not for us as a cpl.

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

[Removed by poster at 04/09/10 00:09:25]

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By *harpDressed ManMan
over a year ago

Here occasionally, but mostly somewhere else

"I agree f###. The lot of yous, and take that the way you want to

Good night in the pub?

To OP - I read the "tenderness thread", and probably commented on it. I read your post in here, and I think you're missing out on some amazing people, experiences and feelings.

However, I respect your right to choose, and to swing in whatever way suits you.

By blocking my profile, you'll be extending me the same respect.

Thanks and good luck.

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

I got what you were saying Pinky and Perky, and we do things the same way ( although obviously not with couples)

Thats the beauty of the site though, we can all look for what WE want to, if like us and you we want literally NSA sex, we can find it, just like others who want intimacy with their meets can find that.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

with all due respect, i really dont think you actually did mean couples in your original post - why would you suggest a couple needs to join a dating site to get tenderness?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"ok this is the male perspective from p and p

nobody has said anything about emotions, the original thread was about tenderness, just like sex, the two can be seperated.

however, sex and tenderness are harder to seperate...unless you wish the woman to keep a safe distance, legs akimbo and you can shoot your load from afar...like target practice.

single women are not just a series of holes for your amusement, they have needs too. you have a right to say no to it just as they have a right to expect it.

i've never had sex that was so fricking amazing that on his first jump i was professing my love within seconds of him entering...would love to know what you guys are doing if you're that spectacular?!

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

A question way off topic, and asked to lots of people who do it........why when blocking is an option for any user , do people mention it so much when someone blocks them?

I wouldn't care who blocks us and certainly wouldn't find it significent enough to mention when someone does.

It always baffles me that one

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"A question way off topic, and asked to lots of people who do it........why when blocking is an option for any user , do people mention it so much when someone blocks them?

I wouldn't care who blocks us and certainly wouldn't find it significent enough to mention when someone does.

It always baffles me that one

lol ditto ruby some peeps

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By *uckscouple2007Couple
over a year ago

Bucks

its time ppl seperated shaggs from emmotions!!!!"

we like to think we are quite spontaneous and if there is an attraction will get straight "down to it" but ...

there has to be that attraction in the first place !

if not then it wont happen .. i wont get hard and sarah wont get moist ..

not looking for luvey-dovey stuff but a general mutual respect and appreciation otherwise ya may as well get ya wallet out and order a "home delivery service" ... arent they still advertised in the back pages of yr typical local paper?

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By *aucy3Couple
over a year ago

glasgow

its time ppl seperated shaggs from emmotions!!!!

we like to think we are quite spontaneous and if there is an attraction will get straight "down to it" but ...

there has to be that attraction in the first place !

if not then it wont happen .. i wont get hard and sarah wont get moist ..

very true.atraction,respect,fuck.thats swinging.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Right after reading the forums time and time again reading about tenderness and how fab it is, holding her head in his hands.....

wanting to have a lover rather than a shag!!!!!!

HELLO PEEPS this is a SWINGING SITE its all about the sex... if you want love tenderness there are dating sites out there

and yes i am the fem half !!!!!

its time ppl seperated shaggs from emmotions!!!!!!!

im not after a lover, im only here for sex, but i do not feel that should mean sex has to be cold and clinical, i love kissing and cuddling, i love the intimate side of sex, i couldnt have sex with someone who didnt kiss me or just wanted to jump on and bang away, i dont feel that means i need a dating site, it just means i enjoy a different side to sex than you

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By *ruitWoman
over a year ago

near kings lynn

naughtyn I totally agree.

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

"Unless someone is cold, calculated and ruthless - there will always be an element of emotion in sex. We are, after all, emotional beings.

Sorry but that's just bollox!

When in the middle of an orgy session and you can barely make out who is doing what to you...... where the hell does emotional attachment come into it?

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By *adchickCouple
over a year ago

Cyprus

i also believe that there is nothing on this earth that is more intimate than sex, so it seems a little strange to say "you cant hold his/her face...but you can....[insert act of sexual nature]""

Making love is intimate, sex is not.

Kissing is intimate

Cupping someones face and looking deep into their eyes is intimate.

There are still those of us, ooohhh I'm such a bad and old fashioned swinger, who equate swinging with sex, not emotion, not tenderness and not intimacy.

My intimacy is at home, with hubby, not with a virtual stranger who is there for a 3sum.

Each to their own in swinging. We don't meet people who want full blown snogging, whispered sweet nothings and an air of intimacy, same as they won't meet us........

Who cares, as long as you all go away happy.

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By *adchickCouple
over a year ago

Cyprus

"Unless someone is cold, calculated and ruthless - there will always be an element of emotion in sex. We are, after all, emotional beings.

Sorry but that's just bollox!

When in the middle of an orgy session and you can barely make out who is doing what to you...... where the hell does emotional attachment come into it?"

Well said Polo...........

I've been in the middle of an orgy and couldn't tell you what their names are, let alone what they looked like!

All I care about is that they are wearing a condom!

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

i also believe that there is nothing on this earth that is more intimate than sex, so it seems a little strange to say "you cant hold his/her face...but you can....[insert act of sexual nature]"

Making love is intimate, sex is not.

Kissing is intimate

Cupping someones face and looking deep into their eyes is intimate.

I have to disagree with this.

Intimate (to me) is what is going on in the mind.... not the physical act.

Making love (to me) is what is going on in the mind.... not the physical act.

A playmate can hold your face in their hands and kiss you softly and be thinking....

A) I wonder if I'll get another shag before I go.

B) I wonder if my meet tomorrow will be better looking than this one.

C) Better take it slow for a moment, I am starting to get a bit sore.

D) Jeeeze I never realised how horny it is to stare into someone's eyes like this when you are just meeting for a shag, I am gonna try this with the next one.

E) yeah they do look older than their photos, but they don't half shag well.

F) I don't think I can hold this fart in much longer, I need to keep their head up here.

G)**blank**

H) Are they wearing contact lenses

I) *snigger snigger* they wouldn't be smiling if they realised what's all over my hands

J) If I squeeze their cheeks in like this they look a bit like my old geography teacher.

K) I wonder if they are feeling what I am feeling right now.

L) I hope they want to do this again.

M) god this person is special

As you may be able to imagine... not all suggest intimate emotional behaviour.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The most amount of sense I have seen posted on here for a long time. It amazes me that the word "emotion" conjures up thoughts of running off into the sunset with the person who's just fucked you into oblivion. Surely if you have no "feelings" involved in a person you are meeting you should just charge for your services. Cold passionless sex?? Give me a giggle, a whispered word and a heartwarming shag anyday!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

" its time ppl seperated shaggs from emmotions!!!!!!!

Each to their own and all that, but the day I have emotionless sex is the day they nail the coffin shut and put me six feet under!

Red xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Agree with this.

You can still have NSA fun without being a robot. It's up to each person how much they want to "feel" when having sex and that is going to depend on the person you are with.

What is difficult is knowing exactly how people like to be treated, as they don't always give clear or honest answers.

To me, kissing a womans neck/earlobe or running your fingers through her hair is normal if you are making love to someone attractive. What each of you allow yourselves to "feel" when doing this is up to you.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

'Swinging'- it really boils down to ones perception or interpretation.

I've made great friends on here and on other sites, a few that I've never played with, but we've struck up a close bond/meet socially and know that we can rely on each others in times of difficulty.

So yes I do think emotions, are a part of swinging, that said so does jealousy, but there's a huge difference between them both!

Paddy x

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By *ruitWoman
over a year ago

near kings lynn

Polo, I totally adore what you have put, it is funny and can only imagine you must have some amazing meets as your personality in that thread is so funny.

If I was a couple(which I certainly am not) then I guess when we would be out swinging it was be just sex all the way with the other couple and same as with my own partner, and then the lovemaking wouldnt happen until we would be at home.

Do couples that meet couples, have sex with th other couple and then swap back to their own partners but they are making love with them? Or in that situation is it just sex and the lovemaking,passionate connection that comes with love and a relationship only comes out once the meet is over??

Just wondered.

Off to read polos comment again.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My intimacy is at home, with hubby, not with a virtual stranger who is there for a 3sum.

absolutely, which is why i dont meet couples, im not keen on the role of "virtual stranger who is there for a 3sum"

i do understand that couples may not want to get intimate with meets, you have a partner to do that with, fair enough.

in my opinion the OP was about singles though, or as i have said before, why would the op suggest couples use a dating site?

anyhow thats my opinion stated and others took on board

i will stick to my emotional, intimate, tender, fucking of hot single men, who dont view me as an accessory to their husband/wife collective fantasy

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By *adchickCouple
over a year ago

Cyprus

My intimacy is at home, with hubby, not with a virtual stranger who is there for a 3sum.

absolutely, which is why i dont meet couples, im not keen on the role of "virtual stranger who is there for a 3sum"

i do understand that couples may not want to get intimate with meets, you have a partner to do that with, fair enough.

in my opinion the OP was about singles though, or as i have said before, why would the op suggest couples use a dating site?

anyhow thats my opinion stated and others took on board

i will stick to my emotional, intimate, tender, fucking of hot single men, who dont view me as an accessory to their husband/wife collective fantasy

I've swung as a single and it is totally different to swinging as a couple.

As I've said before, each to their own.

We don't get intimate on any level with the people we play with, but then, we only play with single men as we've had no end of problems with couples and a single female isn't for us.

However, that said, I do remember, as a single female, on one of the very rare occassions when I played with a couple, literally being chased out of the room by the woman because she thought her hubby was being far to affectionate with me......

I actually understand how she felt now, but I do have a huge amount of empathy for single females on here.

We'll carry on being 'robots', it works for us.

p.s. Polo......... dare I ask how your old georgraphy teacher fits into your overt sexual purposes?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think you're right but i dont believe its because the woman doesnt like it and thats why the guy doesnt do it. When a single female or guy enters into a play session with a couple, in the eyes of the couple, it is about heightening the couples sex life, for them, for a single it will be something different. We all swing for our own personal reasons. The guy of the couple wont want to be tender afterwards, hes had what hes wanted of the person theyve played with. We have to be real about this and understand it for what it is. It wont be because the female of the couple has stopped him. He will no doubt give the person they ahve played with a hug and a kiss and say thank you and hopefully there will be a friendship formed and laughter and fun between all three, but as for the whispering of sweet nothings and kissing, then hes gonna do that with his own partner.

I think its slightly different with a single male. Men know the score where tenderness is concerned. They may want to kiss someone but they are quite content to be the extra cock in a play session becuase they are getting out of it what they want, and thats sex.

If i was a single woman on the scene and going with couples, i would be fully aware that whilst i may have a great time and id expect to be treated with respect and be kept safe and not hurt, id be uncomfortable if the guy wanted something too personal from me, like kissing me too much, or being over affectionate. I wouldnt get involved with any of that as I would have respect for the female of the couple.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

of course, as sinlge women well know, we just provide the orifice for couples to use!

i'd say it's an insecure couple that have a ban on kissing and touching in any manner other than to guide the cock in..."

Can i just clarify from my own perspective on this. I dont agree with no sensitivity. I agree that kissing should happen. If me and him ever played with a single woman, i wouldnt allow her to just be used as an orifice and not be treated respectfully. If she enjoyed kissing then that would be ok for my guy to do, if she was bi then I would kiss her too. I would expect him to treat her as he does me when the sex is happening - cos well it would seem so cold without all that. I mean afterwards really. My guy would probably give the single lady a hug and an kiss and say thanks your gorgeous, or whatever, and so would I of course. But as a couple we would then be off with each other cuddling, kissing, giggling, cos thats what we do. he wouldnt be sitting next to the single female and kissing and whispering to her after the sex and me just left out watching the two of them. Thats what i was referring to.

We havent had penetrative sex with another couple so i cant comment about what that would be like.

This really is why we go for couples because i know that the other couple are close, we are the same, after the play session we tend to have sex with our own perspective partners and then we all sit down chat and laugh.

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By *adchickCouple
over a year ago

Cyprus

i'd say it's an insecure couple that have a ban on kissing

I am sorry, I have to say this.......

Complete and utter fucking twaddle!!!!

There are plenty of swingers who don't do the kissing...... us included. It's only ever lost us one meet.

You just won't find many who will openly admit to it due to the slating we get on here.

And you can ask half the forumites as they know us, we are in no way insecure in our relationship.

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

I have to disagree with this.

Intimate (to me) is what is going on in the mind.... not the physical act.

Making love (to me) is what is going on in the mind.... not the physical act.

A playmate can hold your face in their hands and kiss you softly and be thinking....

A) I wonder if I'll get another shag before I go.

B) I wonder if my meet tomorrow will be better looking than this one.

C) Better take it slow for a moment, I am starting to get a bit sore.

D) Jeeeze I never realised how horny it is to stare into someone's eyes like this when you are just meeting for a shag, I am gonna try this with the next one.

E) yeah they do look older than their photos, but they don't half shag well.

F) I don't think I can hold this fart in much longer, I need to keep their head up here.

G)**blank**

H) Are they wearing contact lenses

I) *snigger snigger* they wouldn't be smiling if they realised what's all over my hands

J) If I squeeze their cheeks in like this they look a bit like my old geography teacher.

K) I wonder if they are feeling what I am feeling right now.

L) I hope they want to do this again.

M) god this person is special

As you may be able to imagine... not all suggest intimate emotional behaviour."

The best post of the thread, thanks Polo lol

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By *ruitWoman
over a year ago

near kings lynn

I am interested in this no kissing thing, in the fact that after meeting many(cough) people over the last 4and half years I have never met anyone that didnt kiss me.

I have met couples and singles, male and female and never has one said they dont kiss.

I cant imagine having sex without kissing, that would be like eating without chocolate being involved. lol

If a couple or single is not wanting to kiss my mouth but is happy to kiss my pussy then that seems very alien to me.As kissing my pussy if far more "serious kissing" to me.

I honestly cant imagine it. It is normal to me to kiss and touch and nibble.... it all follows in the normal way but to not kiss to me would seem not right.

Salt without vinegar and cheese without onion. Who would have salt crisps lol.

How many couples have a no kissing rule and will be honest to say they do aside from the couple already written, and how many singles have a no kissing rule????

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

"I am interested in this no kissing thing, in the fact that after meeting many(cough) people over the last 4and half years I have never met anyone that didnt kiss me.

I have met couples and singles, male and female and never has one said they dont kiss.

I cant imagine having sex without kissing, that would be like eating without chocolate being involved. lol

If a couple or single is not wanting to kiss my mouth but is happy to kiss my pussy then that seems very alien to me.As kissing my pussy if far more "serious kissing" to me.

I honestly cant imagine it. It is normal to me to kiss and touch and nibble.... it all follows in the normal way but to not kiss to me would seem not right.

Salt without vinegar and cheese without onion. Who would have salt crisps lol.

How many couples have a no kissing rule and will be honest to say they do aside from the couple already written, and how many singles have a no kissing rule????

We don't have a "rule " on it as such......and when we first started this playing we had an open mind for everything we would be trying.

The first time a man kissed me during a meet it did bugger all for me..........he may as well have been smacking me around the head with a wet fish for all it did. I didn't know wether I was comfortable with the kissing thing when it happened but just thought maybe he just didn't rock my boat with his kissing.

The next person who kissed me on a meet, I felt exactly the same way, nothing there to excite me and uncomfortable doing it.

Now my OH can snog the gob off me and it is a big turn on....but I have decided that as it does nothing for me it wouldn't bother me if meets don't snog.