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married/attached looking for extra fun, why is it so hard?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

what's your thoughts?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ask your wife.....

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

King's Crustacean

It's hard so that it will go in.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"It's hard so that it will go in."

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By *mm_n_ZedCouple
over a year ago

Fareham

Because a lot of people don't want the complications or potential drama that may come with playing with attached men (or women). Other don't want to on moral grounds. So it stands to reason an attached person will struggle more than a singleton.

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By *andy_tomMan
over a year ago

wolverhampton


"what's your thoughts? "

every ones doing it ,

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If playing away without consent.....then it's not really swinging!

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

King's Crustacean

Your profile doesn't mention you are married so why do you have a problem getting meets ?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

ha ha

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By *mm_n_ZedCouple
over a year ago

Fareham


"Your profile doesn't mention you are married so why do you have a problem getting meets ?"

I thought the same

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

it's a forum, just asking people's thoughts

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By *andy_tomMan
over a year ago

wolverhampton


"If playing away without consent.....then it's not really swinging!"

but your looking for not so single ladies, ... the mind boggles,

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By *oe_Steve_NWestCouple
over a year ago

Bolton


"what's your thoughts?

every ones doing it , "

No they aren't! Z

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By *mm_n_ZedCouple
over a year ago

Fareham


"it's a forum, just asking people's thoughts"

So are you married / attached or not?

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By *oe_Steve_NWestCouple
over a year ago

Bolton

Could I ask a genuine question? How would you feel if your wife/partner cheated on you? Z

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If playing away without consent.....then it's not really swinging!"

He didn't mention anything about swinging

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

King's Crustacean


"it's a forum, just asking people's thoughts"

Fair enough.

I think what people do is their own business.

I don't worry about it as long as they don't involve me.

If the partner/wife/husband dosen't know their partner/husband/wife is cheating on them I think it's ...

just about as lying , deceitful, damaging , trust destroying , family breaking, head harming act that any thoughtless , peabrained, crotch led twat could do to their own.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

For us it's a morals thing.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"what's your thoughts? "

I'm indifferent as long as they don't expect me to get involved.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"what's your thoughts? "

Because this is a swinging site and a lot of people don't consider cheating as swinging.

Plus there is the practicalities - married people come with hassle and/or restrictions that single people don't.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I think people's attitudes spoil it on here and not just for married attached but for everyone.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

so you want the nice home life; the ironing done, the food cupboards filled, the house nice and tidy (maybe you are a modern man and do those things yourself eh...), and a "normal" life, whilst all that is going on you would like illicit sexually encounters without your partners consent, or knowledge...

You would also like the people you meet for illicit sex to believe you are single and that there us no way they end up getting sobbing phone calls from your wife at 01:00am, when she finds your phone or opens up the laptop to discover this secret.

In other words, purely for your own selfish endeavours you are prepared to lie and cheat, disrespecting and disregarding those that care for you, love you and those that believe you to be honest.

Harsh? not half as harsh as finding out the person you have been building a life with has been cavalier with honesty...

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By *andybeachWoman
over a year ago

In the middle

Some people will still meet as they don't care what circumstances people are in but if you are married at least make others aware so that they can make their own minds up

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I think people's attitudes spoil it on here and not just for married attached but for everyone. "

would you care to expand on that point?

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By *andy_tomMan
over a year ago

wolverhampton


"Some people will still meet as they don't care what circumstances people are in but if you are married at least make others aware so that they can make their own minds up "

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

no replies, manners cost nothing. double standards, not giving people a chance. this list goes on!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"so you want the nice home life; the ironing done, the food cupboards filled, the house nice and tidy (maybe you are a modern man and do those things yourself eh...), and a "normal" life, whilst all that is going on you would like illicit sexually encounters without your partners consent, or knowledge...

You would also like the people you meet for illicit sex to believe you are single and that there us no way they end up getting sobbing phone calls from your wife at 01:00am, when she finds your phone or opens up the laptop to discover this secret.

In other words, purely for your own selfish endeavours you are prepared to lie and cheat, disrespecting and disregarding those that care for you, love you and those that believe you to be honest.

Harsh? not half as harsh as finding out the person you have been building a life with has been cavalier with honesty..."

Calm down and take a chill pill he is only asking for your thoughts, he is not saying he is doing it.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

people are already judging and it's only a question in a forum. which is my point exactly!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

thank you

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

[Removed by poster at 17/08/14 12:35:43]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"so you want the nice home life; the ironing done, the food cupboards filled, the house nice and tidy (maybe you are a modern man and do those things yourself eh...), and a "normal" life, whilst all that is going on you would like illicit sexually encounters without your partners consent, or knowledge...

You would also like the people you meet for illicit sex to believe you are single and that there us no way they end up getting sobbing phone calls from your wife at 01:00am, when she finds your phone or opens up the laptop to discover this secret.

In other words, purely for your own selfish endeavours you are prepared to lie and cheat, disrespecting and disregarding those that care for you, love you and those that believe you to be honest.

Harsh? not half as harsh as finding out the person you have been building a life with has been cavalier with honesty...

Calm down and take a chill pill he is only asking for your thoughts, he is not saying he is doing it.

"

Then why does he have a profile on here....actively looking to meet?

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By *andy_tomMan
over a year ago

wolverhampton


"people are already judging and it's only a question in a forum. which is my point exactly! "

people are quick to judge....

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

If people didn't ask for opinions on marrieds playing away, people wouldn't answer and no angst would be displayed .

My advice as always, just get on with it with people who do meet married and playing away.

It is that easy.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I think people's attitudes spoil it on here and not just for married attached but for everyone.

would you care to expand on that point? "

I think it's the point the thread descended in to 'woe is me' and how hard done by the op is

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If playing away without consent.....then it's not really swinging!

but your looking for not so single ladies, ... the mind boggles, "

Because I like to play with cuckold couples...their hubby's are fully aware...it isn't behind anyone's back. Swinging should be open.....

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

All people will not embrace cheating as acceptable

They don't outside swinging, why the fuck would it be any different here

Some will

Many won't

Deal with it

Good luck

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"people are already judging and it's only a question in a forum. which is my point exactly! "

come on sunshine, the wording and tone of the question would lead anyone to that conclusion...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"so you want the nice home life; the ironing done, the food cupboards filled, the house nice and tidy (maybe you are a modern man and do those things yourself eh...), and a "normal" life, whilst all that is going on you would like illicit sexually encounters without your partners consent, or knowledge...

You would also like the people you meet for illicit sex to believe you are single and that there us no way they end up getting sobbing phone calls from your wife at 01:00am, when she finds your phone or opens up the laptop to discover this secret.

In other words, purely for your own selfish endeavours you are prepared to lie and cheat, disrespecting and disregarding those that care for you, love you and those that believe you to be honest.

Harsh? not half as harsh as finding out the person you have been building a life with has been cavalier with honesty...

Calm down and take a chill pill he is only asking for your thoughts, he is not saying he is doing it.

"

Perhaps I should have said "someone" rather than "you", rather than implicating the OP just giving my opinion on the act rather than the writer of the post.

I stand corrected

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I think people's attitudes spoil it on here and not just for married attached but for everyone.

would you care to expand on that point?

I think it's the point the thread descended in to 'woe is me' and how hard done by the op is"

I know, but I always like to see them state that...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"what's your thoughts? "

Why do you think it's so hard?

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By *oe_Steve_NWestCouple
over a year ago

Bolton


"no replies, manners cost nothing. double standards, not giving people a chance. this list goes on! "

Ah - so now we get to the real reason for the thread! Have a look at your wife/partners profile for some tips - she's having loads of fun! Z

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By *andy_tomMan
over a year ago

wolverhampton


"If playing away without consent.....then it's not really swinging!

but your looking for not so single ladies, ... the mind boggles,

Because I like to play with cuckold couples...their hubby's are fully aware...it isn't behind anyone's back. Swinging should be open....."

well your profile doesnt say that it says not so single ladies.. and couples so I take it that you will meet married ladies,

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Any question like this will be met with harsh responses. If only ppl can just answer questions on here without judging the gentleman without facts could be an interesting post.

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By *LFB.Woman
over a year ago

Farnborough.

Personally i dont play with lone married men, just dont want the crap that goes with it when it all goes tits up lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

probably the complication that come with it, just want other people's thoughts

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By *oe_Steve_NWestCouple
over a year ago

Bolton


"Could I ask a genuine question? How would you feel if your wife/partner cheated on you? Z"

Just interested. Z

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By *mm_n_ZedCouple
over a year ago

Fareham


"I think people's attitudes spoil it on here and not just for married attached but for everyone.

would you care to expand on that point?

I think it's the point the thread descended in to 'woe is me' and how hard done by the op is"

and he hasn't actually replied as to whether the question he posed is borne out of the fact he's attached himself. I don't like making assumptions...

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By *andy_tomMan
over a year ago

wolverhampton


"If playing away without consent.....then it's not really swinging!

but your looking for not so single ladies, ... the mind boggles,

Because I like to play with cuckold couples...their hubby's are fully aware...it isn't behind anyone's back. Swinging should be open....."

may be you should try reading your own profile .

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"I think people's attitudes spoil it on here and not just for married attached but for everyone. "

Attitudes to what?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If playing away without consent.....then it's not really swinging!

but your looking for not so single ladies, ... the mind boggles,

Because I like to play with cuckold couples...their hubby's are fully aware...it isn't behind anyone's back. Swinging should be open.....

well your profile doesnt say that it says not so single ladies.. and couples so I take it that you will meet married ladies, "

Maybe you should read the forum rules and not critique other people's profiles without being asked to

crystal

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"what's your thoughts? "

I think it's hard for all men playing alone, single or married. Lots of people will avoid married men for many reasons ranging from they don't believe people should be dishonest within relationships t they don't want to be involved in any mess that ensues.

There are lots of people who will get involved though.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This is why we only meet genuine married or attached couples rather then singles or fuck buddies as we we don't like the idea of playing with CHEATING scumbags that has no respect for there partner who is probably at home looking after the kids while partner is out fucking someone else's mrs !!! But I'm not judging anyone on this thread just our opinion

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By *andy_tomMan
over a year ago

wolverhampton

I wasnt critiqueing just stating a fact .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Because if you're married you've already shown yourself to be a liar and a cheater (and in my opinion a coward too) so why would any woman want to meet you?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If playing away without consent.....then it's not really swinging!"

I was cheated on for 20 years and could nit be part of or contribute to the hurt his wife would feel if she found out. If you arnt happy in a relationship then leave. Swinging is about fun and concensual fun by all parties... Dont think not telling the wife means she consents.

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By *oe_Steve_NWestCouple
over a year ago

Bolton

I do love threads which asks for comments then the op acts all hurt when people do just that! Z

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I'm in no way hurt but just proves a point with your comments

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By *mm_n_ZedCouple
over a year ago

Fareham


"I'm in no way hurt but just proves a point with your comments "

Proves what point? You haven't even come clean and stated categorically if you're attached or single. People have given their personal opinions of what THEY think regarding playing with married or attached people - that is exactly what you asked for.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"what's your thoughts? "

Because it's a swinging site. Swinging is about trust and respect for other people.

If cheating people just got on with what they are doing and didn't whine about other people not wanting to meet them, they would surely be much happier. (That is a general comment, not aimed at you OP.)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The OP asked a question. Why the witch hunt? It's no-one's business if he's married, single, cheating or whatever.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"

The OP asked a question. Why the witch hunt? It's no-one's business if he's married, single, cheating or whatever. "

thank you, see some nice people on here

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London


"If people didn't ask for opinions on marrieds playing away, people wouldn't answer and no angst would be displayed .

My advice as always, just get on with it with people who do meet married and playing away.

It is that easy.

"

Exactly! However, I don't expect those cheating to understand they are not entitled as their very action screams "entitled!"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not sure why its hard, but I defo like to play with married women

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By *othingButCocoChanelWoman
over a year ago

Glasgow


"no replies, manners cost nothing. double standards, not giving people a chance. this list goes on! "

So "no manners" is worse than a lying cheating non respectful pig?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"

The OP asked a question. Why the witch hunt? It's no-one's business if he's married, single, cheating or whatever.

thank you, see some nice people on here "

Oh crikey I hope you don't mean me. I'm not nice. x

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"no replies, manners cost nothing. double standards, not giving people a chance. this list goes on!

So "no manners" is worse than a lying cheating non respectful pig?"

that was I comment in general why it's hard for certain people on here ie single guys, a slight diversion to the original question

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"

The OP asked a question. Why the witch hunt? It's no-one's business if he's married, single, cheating or whatever.

thank you, see some nice people on here

Oh crikey I hope you don't mean me. I'm not nice. x "

oh sorry are you a nasty bitch then?? lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"

The OP asked a question. Why the witch hunt? It's no-one's business if he's married, single, cheating or whatever.

thank you, see some nice people on here "

I'm confused. You asked for people's thoughts and you got them. Just because you don't agree with those thoughts it seems unfair to allude that people aren't 'nice'

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By *othingButCocoChanelWoman
over a year ago

Glasgow


"

The OP asked a question. Why the witch hunt? It's no-one's business if he's married, single, cheating or whatever.

thank you, see some nice people on here

I'm confused. You asked for people's thoughts and you got them. Just because you don't agree with those thoughts it seems unfair to allude that people aren't 'nice' "

This

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"

The OP asked a question. Why the witch hunt? It's no-one's business if he's married, single, cheating or whatever.

thank you, see some nice people on here

Oh crikey I hope you don't mean me. I'm not nice. x

oh sorry are you a nasty bitch then?? lol"

Umm no....

They have a fair point- ignoring the abusive posts, people are entitled to disagree with you. Doesn't mean they aren't nice. I think it's shit for you to get abuse for no reason. But it's just words.

You asked for opinions... you got opinions...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"no replies, manners cost nothing. double standards, not giving people a chance. this list goes on!

So "no manners" is worse than a lying cheating non respectful pig?"

Bit harsh

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I am ignoring them, I did ask for opinions and I got them, most make me laugh, there's always keyboard warriors out there.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"no replies, manners cost nothing. double standards, not giving people a chance. this list goes on!

So "no manners" is worse than a lying cheating non respectful pig?

Bit harsh "

ha ha

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I wish I could remember where I last posted a reply to this question so I could copy & paste my answer!

This is a swingers site but people use it for all kinds of other activities including NSA sex & socialising.

It's an emotive subject as you can see from the responses so far. Having said that there are plenty of people that will meet marrieds and plenty that will not.

Just inform people before you meet then they can decide for themselves.

and remember whilst a forum is public opinion it's not everyone's opinion on here, regardless of the subject matter!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"This is why we only meet genuine married or attached couples rather then singles or fuck buddies as we we don't like the idea of playing with CHEATING scumbags that has no respect for there partner who is probably at home looking after the kids while partner is out fucking someone else's mrs !!! But I'm not judging anyone on this thread just our opinion "

We are fuck buddies, probably more friends with benefits, who have been on here many years as singles and enjoy meeting single guys as a couple. We are not cheating scumbags as we're both happily single. We understand people have preferences and are fine with that.

To answer the original op, many, like us, don't want to meet people who are married/attached for moral reasons and any repercussions that might come from it if the other half found out. We just want no part in playing with someone else's partner. We don't judge or care why married/attached people are on here as its none of our business and its no concern of ours anyway, its just not for us.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"it's a forum, just asking people's thoughts

Fair enough.

I think what people do is their own business.

I don't worry about it as long as they don't involve me.

If the partner/wife/husband dosen't know their partner/husband/wife is cheating on them I think it's ...

just about as lying , deceitful, damaging , trust destroying , family breaking, head harming act that any thoughtless , peabrained, crotch led twat could do to their own."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Note to self: next time someone asks for thoughts/opinions, check with them first what I should write, thread done.

My opinion; cheating = dishonesty. lie about that, lie about all sorts "I always play safe" - trust = swing.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"it's a forum, just asking people's thoughts

Fair enough.

I think what people do is their own business.

I don't worry about it as long as they don't involve me.

If the partner/wife/husband dosen't know their partner/husband/wife is cheating on them I think it's ...

just about as lying , deceitful, damaging , trust destroying , family breaking, head harming act that any thoughtless , peabrained, crotch led twat could do to their own."

haha very good

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By *ust MonicaWoman
over a year ago

CAMBRIDGESHIRE


"it's a forum, just asking people's thoughts

Fair enough.

I think what people do is their own business.

I don't worry about it as long as they don't involve me.

If the partner/wife/husband dosen't know their partner/husband/wife is cheating on them I think it's ...

just about as lying , deceitful, damaging , trust destroying , family breaking, head harming act that any thoughtless , peabrained, crotch led twat could do to their own."

Well said!

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By *mm_n_ZedCouple
over a year ago

Fareham

I don't see any posts that have abused you personally OP. You asked peoples' thoughts on why married or attached men find it hard to get meets and people gave their their opinions. If you'd said 'I'm cheating on my wife/partner. What are your thoughts?' then comments may have been more personal - but the opinions I've read on here are more generic.

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By *ensual temptressWoman
over a year ago

Southampton

[Removed by poster at 17/08/14 14:16:16]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I have no issue people meeting who they want attached or not, cheating or not. What I do have issue with is them then not respecting my choice not to meet them. The "oh but why not its not problem " and the classic "but i wont get found out ".That's after they eventually come clean about not being the genuine singleton they proclaim to be .

Who wants the hassles when there are plenty of single guys with the complications"

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By *ensual temptressWoman
over a year ago

Southampton

I have no issue people meeting who they want attached or not, cheating or not. What I do have issue with is them then not respecting my choice not to meet them. The "oh but why not its not problem " and the classic "but i wont get found out ".That's after they eventually come clean about not being the genuine singleton they proclaim to be .

Who wants the hassles when there are plenty of single guys with out the complications

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I have no issue people meeting who they want attached or not, cheating or not. What I do have issue with is them then not respecting my choice not to meet them. The "oh but why not its not problem " and the classic "but i wont get found out ".That's after they eventually come clean about not being the genuine singleton they proclaim to be .

Who wants the hassles when there are plenty of single guys with out the complications

"

We guessed you mean without

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By *orthyorkypairCouple
over a year ago

North Yorkshire


"I think people's attitudes spoil it on here and not just for married attached but for everyone. "

by attitude we assume you mean peoples choices and preferences!!!!!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You put something out on a post, people will give their opinions. If you don't like what's said and make comments like you have, maybe this isn't the place for you

FYI, I don't give a monkeys who shags whom (who ?) Grammar police, please advise

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not everyone who cheats has the perfect partner at home or has the choice to leave. It's an individual thing. People who don't meet married people,men and women,have their reasons and should be respected. Why it's so difficult for married people to meet is because of those reasons. Personally,I don't like meeting married/in a relationship men because of many reasons. The partner being one of them,the difficulty to arrange to meet and,in some cases,the attitude of the man. It's not cut and dried in any case; I've been told the most elaborate stories by men who I found out to be married or in a relationship. I don't feel satisfaction from having sex with them

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"This is why we only meet genuine married or attached couples rather then singles or fuck buddies as we we don't like the idea of playing with CHEATING scumbags that has no respect for there partner who is probably at home looking after the kids while partner is out fucking someone else's mrs !!! But I'm not judging anyone on this thread just our opinion "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"what's your thoughts? "

No woman wants your wife on her drive way screaming how she's a whore who destroyed her marriage whilst booting her car in once she catches you.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I am ignoring them, I did ask for opinions and I got them, most make me laugh, there's always keyboard warriors out there. "

Why bother asking for opinions if you are going to ignore all those that differ from your own?

Nobody has attacked you personally, they have given their opinions on the subject in general. You are the one making rude comments and remarks about people who have posted.

Personally I think the stinking attitude of cheats ruins this site, not the people who refuse to meet them.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"what's your thoughts? "

It's not easy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This is as popular as the bareback threads, it will go back and forth lol.

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By *oe_Steve_NWestCouple
over a year ago

Bolton


"This is as popular as the bareback threads, it will go back and forth lol."

For sure! Z

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead


"I am ignoring them, I did ask for opinions and I got them, most make me laugh, there's always keyboard warriors out there. "

for every person who screams "keyboard warrior"... this is one who like to play the role of "hard done by victim".....

which role would you be playing today...

I was going to keep out of this.. but when you mentioned the word "complication" in a blaise way... it boils my blood

that "complication" would be someones partner... the person they profess to love more than any other....

if you think about it... to come on a website.. pick, arrange, and play isn't a spur of the moment thing...

its rational thought, its cold, its calculated........

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

it's only a question I asked. I have my opinions and people have there's. I never asked to be for a better word attacked. it's a bit of fun for gods sake! I'm not answering everyone's comments as I'd be here all night. plus I'm not getting into a slanging match on here, like I said it's a question and a bit of fun.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"it's only a question I asked. I have my opinions and people have there's. I never asked to be for a better word attacked. it's a bit of fun for gods sake! I'm not answering everyone's comments as I'd be here all night. plus I'm not getting into a slanging match on here, like I said it's a question and a bit of fun. "

But it's not a bit of fun to the partner left at home. Or the person confronted or worse outed for meeting a cheat

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

the question was a bit of fun

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn


"it's only a question I asked. I have my opinions and people have there's. I never asked to be for a better word attacked. it's a bit of fun for gods sake! I'm not answering everyone's comments as I'd be here all night. plus I'm not getting into a slanging match on here, like I said it's a question and a bit of fun. "

did you honestly expect it to be easy ? when you joined did you think being married might put some people off.

how do you position it with potential meets, do you tell them upfront?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"what's your thoughts? "

Because they've taken the easy way out instead of ending the relationship when cheating can do worse harm than ending the relationship.

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By *mm_n_ZedCouple
over a year ago

Fareham


"the question was a bit of fun "

You have a very strange sense of humour!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

To be fair. I was one of the first to attack and it was unjustified.

1. At no point has the OP stated they are cheating

2. As such the personal attacks are unjustified for that.

However, the heading "why is it so hard for married or attached......" implies that there is a difficulty for those people to get meets, this must come from experience or perhaps it is just general knowledge.

I see things like "I am married/attached and honest about it", and I think really, you are honest to the people on fabs but not your partner.... selective honesty then?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"no replies, manners cost nothing. double standards, not giving people a chance. this list goes on! "

No reply = no thanks, it's that bloody simple!!!

Get rid if your self entitlement to anything on this site instead of moaning!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

everyone is assuming my marital status, I've not said the subject is about me, it's was a general question to gage people's opinions. that is all.

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead


"it's a forum, just asking people's thoughts

Fair enough.

I think what people do is their own business.

I don't worry about it as long as they don't involve me.

If the partner/wife/husband dosen't know their partner/husband/wife is cheating on them I think it's ...

just about as lying , deceitful, damaging , trust destroying , family breaking, head harming act that any thoughtless , peabrained, crotch led twat could do to their own."

actually... this answer is better than mine....

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn


"everyone is assuming my marital status, I've not said the subject is about me, it's was a general question to gage people's opinions. that is all. "

cool, if you're not... no worries then

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By *bony in IvoryCouple
over a year ago

Black&White Utopia


"I think people's attitudes spoil it on here and not just for married attached but for everyone. "
there is a whole world of swinging/swingers out there ( not just here in forums) we have also met swingers who don't even use fab.. So who spoiling what for whom?

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By *mm_n_ZedCouple
over a year ago

Fareham


"everyone is assuming my marital status, I've not said the subject is about me, it's was a general question to gage people's opinions. that is all. "

In my earlier response I said I don't like to assume but gave reasons as to why people may prefer not to play with attached people in general. I did ask if you were married or attached yourself - but you didn't respond (which is your prerogative) although that does lead people to come to their own conclusions regarding your status... especially as you posed this rather specific question in the first place.

I wouldn't think to ask about problems relating to bondage as it's not something we're into - although people could be forgiven for thinking we were if we asked about it.

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By *ordonBennettMan
over a year ago

dover


"everyone is assuming my marital status, I've not said the subject is about me, it's was a general question to gage people's opinions. that is all.

cool, if you're not... no worries then

"

The way the topic is posed and presented

"married/attached looking for extra fun, why is it so hard? " would strongly imply that the OP is married,has tried, and found it hard...

If the question had been phrased

"married/attached looking for extra fun, why is it so despised?" or some such similar verb, then such inference would be less plausible.

Judging by other remarks made in the thread, the OP also seems to harbour a good deal of resentment towards couples in general with accusations of bad manners and double standards etc.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

people are taking everything the wrong way, it was a simple question. it's all been one sided saying it's the wife at home they feel sorry for. never the bloke at home. this is where my question was aimed at. it's it more acceptable for a woman to be cheating or the guy? judging by the comments on.here it's frowned upon if it's the guy. not one person in all the comments have mentioned the woman cheating or feeling sorry for the husband. this is not about my martial status as I said before. it's the whole situation and being attached/married on this site. whether there male or female?

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By *mm_n_ZedCouple
over a year ago

Fareham


"people are taking everything the wrong way, it was a simple question. it's all been one sided saying it's the wife at home they feel sorry for. never the bloke at home. this is where my question was aimed at. it's it more acceptable for a woman to be cheating or the guy? judging by the comments on.here it's frowned upon if it's the guy. not one person in all the comments have mentioned the woman cheating or feeling sorry for the husband. this is not about my martial status as I said before. it's the whole situation and being attached/married on this site. whether there male or female? "

Please look at my comment - 5th post down. I mention cheating women.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well yes some have double standards. I will not meet married women, cheating is cheating, if hubby knows, well maybe we can talk but that depends on the dynamic.. been thumped once and had a number of anonymous threats by text message to go down the partnered/married unknowing route again

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

some people just want an argument lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"people are taking everything the wrong way, it was a simple question. it's all been one sided saying it's the wife at home they feel sorry for. never the bloke at home. this is where my question was aimed at. it's it more acceptable for a woman to be cheating or the guy? judging by the comments on.here it's frowned upon if it's the guy. not one person in all the comments have mentioned the woman cheating or feeling sorry for the husband. this is not about my martial status as I said before. it's the whole situation and being attached/married on this site. whether there male or female? "

It's because they assumed the thread was about you - a man. So they made comments about a married man.

Other threads have specifically asked about cheating women and women get (mostly) the same response.

The general consensus seems to be that -often- men whine about being married and not getting meets, whereas women just get on with it on the quiet... so no-one notices/ comments on the women.

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By *mm_n_ZedCouple
over a year ago

Fareham


"some people just want an argument lol"

You call it an argument because, for some reason, you seem to be on the defensive. Others would say it's a debate where they have been asked to give an opinion on a contentious subject and are willing to offer reasons for their stance.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We wouldn't play with a guy or a woman who was married or attached. We meet with people who can accomodate and spend an eving doing whatever we do. Attached people often make last minute excuses to cancel or can only spare an hour away!

We wouldn't do it to each other and therefore wouldn't encourage others to play away either.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"people are taking everything the wrong way, it was a simple question. it's all been one sided saying it's the wife at home they feel sorry for. never the bloke at home. this is where my question was aimed at. it's it more acceptable for a woman to be cheating or the guy? judging by the comments on.here it's frowned upon if it's the guy. not one person in all the comments have mentioned the woman cheating or feeling sorry for the husband. this is not about my martial status as I said before. it's the whole situation and being attached/married on this site. whether there male or female? "

Put your head above the parapet!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"people are taking everything the wrong way, it was a simple question. it's all been one sided saying it's the wife at home they feel sorry for. never the bloke at home. this is where my question was aimed at. it's it more acceptable for a woman to be cheating or the guy? judging by the comments on.here it's frowned upon if it's the guy. not one person in all the comments have mentioned the woman cheating or feeling sorry for the husband. this is not about my martial status as I said before. it's the whole situation and being attached/married on this site. whether there male or female?

Please look at my comment - 5th post down. I mention cheating women."

Likewise, I have made 2 comments both of which were gender neutral

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By *ordonBennettMan
over a year ago

dover


"some people just want an argument lol

You call it an argument because, for some reason, you seem to be on the defensive. Others would say it's a debate where they have been asked to give an opinion on a contentious subject and are willing to offer reasons for their stance.

"

It is as you say a contentious subject and therefore bound to elicit an emotive and often judgemental reaction and response in answering the question posed

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I am married, yes she does know I am on here, why does she put up with it? Simple she hates sex, only has it may be once every two three months, she could do with out it very easily. Why do I put up with it don't know ! I Love her but, I don't care what anyone says we all have that need for procreation (apart from my wife!) it's what we do about it.

Armour at the ready lol

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

King's Crustacean

[Removed by poster at 17/08/14 17:40:15]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I am married, yes she does know I am on here, why does she put up with it? Simple she hates sex, only has it may be once every two three months, she could do with out it very easily. Why do I put up with it don't know ! I Love her but, I don't care what anyone says we all have that need for procreation (apart from my wife!) it's what we do about it.

Armour at the ready lol"

I'm the same as your wife, I don't hate sex but I can go without it, it's not the be all, end all of a relationship, but some people are too selfish to even talk to their wives/partners about the lack of sex

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By *wingbiusMan
over a year ago

northwich

[Removed by poster at 17/08/14 18:21:16]

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By *andACouple
over a year ago

glasgow

I did find an earlier comment about 'not giving people a chance' quite amusing. We definitely don't give people a chance, we're only looking to meet those who tick all the boxes.

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By *oe_Steve_NWestCouple
over a year ago

Bolton


"I did find an earlier comment about 'not giving people a chance' quite amusing. We definitely don't give people a chance, we're only looking to meet those who tick all the boxes."

Quite agree - why should others be expected to lower their standards just cos some people feel entitled? Z

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Top tip of the day... if you're not married don't start a thread complaining about how married 'singles' can't get meets... just like if you're straight you might be best off not starting a thread bemoaning the difficulty gay guys get trying to arrange meets

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

it's not about lowering standards more of letting people who have only just joined have a chance. after they have only just joined.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"it's a forum, just asking people's thoughts

Fair enough.

I think what people do is their own business.

I don't worry about it as long as they don't involve me.

If the partner/wife/husband dosen't know their partner/husband/wife is cheating on them I think it's ...

just about as lying , deceitful, damaging , trust destroying , family breaking, head harming act that any thoughtless , peabrained, crotch led twat could do to their own."

I love you Granny Crumpet xx

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Top tip of the day... if you're not married don't start a thread complaining about how married 'singles' can't get meets... just like if you're straight you might be best off not starting a thread bemoaning the difficulty gay guys get trying to arrange meets "

I'm not moaning I'm simply asking a question asking people's opinions on the subject!

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By *oe_Steve_NWestCouple
over a year ago

Bolton


"it's not about lowering standards more of letting people who have only just joined have a chance. after they have only just joined. "

We've met a few people who were very new to both swinging and/or this site - we wouldn't 'give a chance' to any one we didn't think we were compatible with - why should we? Z

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Can I also add that by not giving non verified memebers a chance, the ones searching for men, can miss out on their match

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"it's not about lowering standards more of letting people who have only just joined have a chance. after they have only just joined.

We've met a few people who were very new to both swinging and/or this site - we wouldn't 'give a chance' to any one we didn't think we were compatible with - why should we? Z"

I'm not saying you should, but some won't even entertain some one with no varies. but if no one gives them a chance they will never get anywhere on the site. that's all I meant

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Can I also add that by not giving non verified memebers a chance, the ones searching for men, can miss out on their match "

That maybe so, but updating looking for a quick shag tonight is also not the best way to get a meet either !!

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By *oe_Steve_NWestCouple
over a year ago

Bolton


"it's not about lowering standards more of letting people who have only just joined have a chance. after they have only just joined.

We've met a few people who were very new to both swinging and/or this site - we wouldn't 'give a chance' to any one we didn't think we were compatible with - why should we? Z

I'm not saying you should, but some won't even entertain some one with no varies. but if no one gives them a chance they will never get anywhere on the site. that's all I meant "

And that's completely up to them - we've met a few guys with no verifications although we do steer clear of cheats Z

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"it's not about lowering standards more of letting people who have only just joined have a chance. after they have only just joined.

We've met a few people who were very new to both swinging and/or this site - we wouldn't 'give a chance' to any one we didn't think we were compatible with - why should we? Z

I'm not saying you should, but some won't even entertain some one with no varies. but if no one gives them a chance they will never get anywhere on the site. that's all I meant "

There are many ways to get verified. The easiest is to attend an organised social meet and get yourself known. They're a good laugh too. There are many ways to help yourself on this site. Good luck.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"it's not about lowering standards more of letting people who have only just joined have a chance. after they have only just joined. "

seriously

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't have a problem with it!!!

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By *oe_Steve_NWestCouple
over a year ago

Bolton


"it's not about lowering standards more of letting people who have only just joined have a chance. after they have only just joined.

seriously "

Like a 'charity shag' ? lol Z

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Can I also add that by not giving non verified memebers a chance, the ones searching for men, can miss out on their match

That maybe so, but updating looking for a quick shag tonight is also not the best way to get a meet either !! "
I know, at least I have fun doing it

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By *oe_Steve_NWestCouple
over a year ago

Bolton


"Can I also add that by not giving non verified memebers a chance, the ones searching for men, can miss out on their match

That maybe so, but updating looking for a quick shag tonight is also not the best way to get a meet either !! I know, at least I have fun doing it "

It's entirely up to you what you have in your status! if it works for you then go for it. Z

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"it's not about lowering standards more of letting people who have only just joined have a chance. after they have only just joined.

seriously

Like a 'charity shag' ? lol Z"

Oh of course

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By *mm_n_ZedCouple
over a year ago

Fareham


"it's not about lowering standards more of letting people who have only just joined have a chance. after they have only just joined.

We've met a few people who were very new to both swinging and/or this site - we wouldn't 'give a chance' to any one we didn't think we were compatible with - why should we? Z

I'm not saying you should, but some won't even entertain some one with no varies. but if no one gives them a chance they will never get anywhere on the site. that's all I meant "

Then work harder at getting those verifications... go to socials, clubs, parties and get chatting to people who will verify you as a genuine guy.

I'm not sure how your comment ties in with your OP 'thoughts on why it's hard for married guys to get meets' (you seem to have changed tack regarding what this thread is about) but I can only suggest that you're honest with any potential meets regarding your relationship status.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Can I also add that by not giving non verified memebers a chance, the ones searching for men, can miss out on their match

That maybe so, but updating looking for a quick shag tonight is also not the best way to get a meet either !! I know, at least I have fun doing it

It's entirely up to you what you have in your status! if it works for you then go for it. Z"
Yes and it works really well and thanks x.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I've not changed the subject other people have, im.just answering the questions aimed at me, but if I don't I get slated for.that too!!

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By *oe_Steve_NWestCouple
over a year ago

Bolton


"I've not changed the subject other people have, im.just answering the questions aimed at me, but if I don't I get slated for.that too!!"

Not being judgemental or whatever - can i ask how you'd feel if you were being cheated on? This is a question that i've asked a few times on such threads and have yet to be answered. Z

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Can I also add that by not giving non verified memebers a chance, the ones searching for men, can miss out on their match

That maybe so, but updating looking for a quick shag tonight is also not the best way to get a meet either !! I know, at least I have fun doing it

It's entirely up to you what you have in your status! if it works for you then go for it. Z"

Indeed. And not sure why others would feel the need to comment on it either

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I've not changed the subject other people have, im.just answering the questions aimed at me, but if I don't I get slated for.that too!!

Not being judgemental or whatever - can i ask how you'd feel if you were being cheated on? This is a question that i've asked a few times on such threads and have yet to be answered. Z"

Why do I need to answer that? the post in the forum is not about me being cheated on.is.it? it's about the the title says?? and I'm changing the subject???????

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By *oe_Steve_NWestCouple
over a year ago

Bolton


"I've not changed the subject other people have, im.just answering the questions aimed at me, but if I don't I get slated for.that too!!

Not being judgemental or whatever - can i ask how you'd feel if you were being cheated on? This is a question that i've asked a few times on such threads and have yet to be answered. Z

Why do I need to answer that? the post in the forum is not about me being cheated on.is.it? it's about the the title says?? and I'm changing the subject???????"

Calm down - the title of the thread does suggest that you're not getting meets as you're in a relationship - i was interested to guage your reaction to finding out that you were being cheated on - not an awfuly difficult concept and i do apologise for the probing nature of the question - i know i'd be gutted if i was being lied to. Z

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Top tip of the day... if you're not married don't start a thread complaining about how married 'singles' can't get meets... just like if you're straight you might be best off not starting a thread bemoaning the difficulty gay guys get trying to arrange meets

I'm not moaning I'm simply asking a question asking people's opinions on the subject! "

I think the other top tip of the day is... if the question you're asking does not represent you and is only a curiosity of yours you might be best off making that clear in the first post otherwise you'll spend the whole thread trying to explain it away lol

Don't sweat it mate... I've come a cropper from this one a few times before now. It's just a matter of damage limitation until the thread is either full or it is eclipsed by some newbie asking why all the women aren't queuing up round the block to shag him

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

maybe I should of stated it was a general question and made it more clearer, I've chatted to a few people on this site and met a few, and had all.different opinions on the subject.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Can I also add that by not giving non verified memebers a chance, the ones searching for men, can miss out on their match

That maybe so, but updating looking for a quick shag tonight is also not the best way to get a meet either !! "

Why not?

There are people on here who are looking for a quick shag..

We have had meets where we have stated it's a fuck and go meet, still had plenty of meets...

Can't see how it could be different for him as we are all on here looking for different things

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"For us it's a morals thing.

"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If playing away without consent.....then it's not really swinging!

but your looking for not so single ladies, ... the mind boggles,

Because I like to play with cuckold couples...their hubby's are fully aware...it isn't behind anyone's back. Swinging should be open.....

may be you should try reading your own profile . "

Says the guy with no verifications and wanting to breed! and be a sperm dona! And can't spell in your status. Maybe you should re read your own!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If playing away without consent.....then it's not really swinging!

but your looking for not so single ladies, ... the mind boggles,

Because I like to play with cuckold couples...their hubby's are fully aware...it isn't behind anyone's back. Swinging should be open.....

may be you should try reading your own profile . "

Maybe you should take your own advice??

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By *imon_79Man
over a year ago

southend

Maybe there should be another tick box in people's profile saying "will meet married."

Everyone's entitled to their opinions and if they won't meet married people, then that must be respected. By the same token people that will meet married or are married themselves is completely their choice and should be respected. I think if people are married and playing away, they should be upfront about it though. Then people can make an informed choice.

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead


"Maybe there should be another tick box in people's profile saying "will meet married."

Everyone's entitled to their opinions and if they won't meet married people, then that must be respected. By the same token people that will meet married or are married themselves is completely their choice and should be respected. I think if people are married and playing away, they should be upfront about it though. Then people can make an informed choice."

.... nice in theory, but that would only work if someone was telling the truth, relying on someone that is likely to be already lying behind the back of the person they profess to love more than any other... why believe them now?

so kind of warped irony in there.......

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By *ptimusDMan
over a year ago

Birmingham


"Maybe there should be another tick box in people's profile saying "will meet married."

Everyone's entitled to their opinions and if they won't meet married people, then that must be respected. By the same token people that will meet married or are married themselves is completely their choice and should be respected. I think if people are married and playing away, they should be upfront about it though. Then people can make an informed choice.

.... nice in theory, but that would only work if someone was telling the truth, relying on someone that is likely to be already lying behind the back of the person they profess to love more than any other... why believe them now?

so kind of warped irony in there......."

I don't see any warped irony here at all.

Someone tells you they're married and playing without their partner's knowledge. If you don't meet married people then you've got all the information you need to say "No". I don't see how the fact that they're lying to "someone who they profess to love more than any other", as you put it, affects anything from there on.

If you're not bothered whether your playmates are married or not, then the "lying to someone who they profess to love more than any other" will be of no consequence.

My main issue with threads like these is that they even come up at all.

If you can't find a playmate if you're playing whilst married, then you'll have no success either if you're single.

The site is full of people with all sorts of preferences. Leave those alone that don't play with someone with your profile and go find someone who will play with you, knowing that you're married. And contrary to what many people think, there are more than enough people on the site that aren't bothered.

Those who don't approve of the practice are more emotionally involved than those who aren't bothered, and threads like these very quickly transform to one full of expressions of disgust, name calling, etc etc.

No one group of people have the sole right to call themselves swingers. As far as I'm concerned, as long as you're on the site looking for NSA sex, then you're a swinger, regardless of your personal circumstances.

If we can only just respect each other's preferences, then we'll avoid all sorts of aggravation.

Infidelity has been going on since Adam was a lad. If it bothers you then don't meet people who are doing it. If you're playing without your partner's knowledge then respect the wishes of those who don't want to meet you and go find someone who will.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Maybe there should be another tick box in people's profile saying "will meet married."

Everyone's entitled to their opinions and if they won't meet married people, then that must be respected. By the same token people that will meet married or are married themselves is completely their choice and should be respected. I think if people are married and playing away, they should be upfront about it though. Then people can make an informed choice.

.... nice in theory, but that would only work if someone was telling the truth, relying on someone that is likely to be already lying behind the back of the person they profess to love more than any other... why believe them now?

so kind of warped irony in there.......

I don't see any warped irony here at all.

Someone tells you they're married and playing without their partner's knowledge. If you don't meet married people then you've got all the information you need to say "No". I don't see how the fact that they're lying to "someone who they profess to love more than any other", as you put it, affects anything from there on.

If you're not bothered whether your playmates are married or not, then the "lying to someone who they profess to love more than any other" will be of no consequence.

My main issue with threads like these is that they even come up at all.

If you can't find a playmate if you're playing whilst married, then you'll have no success either if you're single.

The site is full of people with all sorts of preferences. Leave those alone that don't play with someone with your profile and go find someone who will play with you, knowing that you're married. And contrary to what many people think, there are more than enough people on the site that aren't bothered.

Those who don't approve of the practice are more emotionally involved than those who aren't bothered, and threads like these very quickly transform to one full of expressions of disgust, name calling, etc etc.

No one group of people have the sole right to call themselves swingers. As far as I'm concerned, as long as you're on the site looking for NSA sex, then you're a swinger, regardless of your personal circumstances.

If we can only just respect each other's preferences, then we'll avoid all sorts of aggravation.

Infidelity has been going on since Adam was a lad. If it bothers you then don't meet people who are doing it. If you're playing without your partner's knowledge then respect the wishes of those who don't want to meet you and go find someone who will."

I think his point was, that many don't admit they have a wife or partner at home and claim to be single as they know it would hinder their success on here. These people are not likely to have the box ticked on their profile. Therefore rendering it a tad useless.

The only person I'm emotionally involved with is my boyfriend. The fact that I despise cheating and those who do it stems from a belief that people should treat each other with decency and respect, and not carry out a "practice" that they know would devastate someone else (who they usually laughingly claim to love.)

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By *ptimusDMan
over a year ago

Birmingham


"Maybe there should be another tick box in people's profile saying "will meet married."

Everyone's entitled to their opinions and if they won't meet married people, then that must be respected. By the same token people that will meet married or are married themselves is completely their choice and should be respected. I think if people are married and playing away, they should be upfront about it though. Then people can make an informed choice.

.... nice in theory, but that would only work if someone was telling the truth, relying on someone that is likely to be already lying behind the back of the person they profess to love more than any other... why believe them now?

so kind of warped irony in there.......

I don't see any warped irony here at all.

Someone tells you they're married and playing without their partner's knowledge. If you don't meet married people then you've got all the information you need to say "No". I don't see how the fact that they're lying to "someone who they profess to love more than any other", as you put it, affects anything from there on.

If you're not bothered whether your playmates are married or not, then the "lying to someone who they profess to love more than any other" will be of no consequence.

My main issue with threads like these is that they even come up at all.

If you can't find a playmate if you're playing whilst married, then you'll have no success either if you're single.

The site is full of people with all sorts of preferences. Leave those alone that don't play with someone with your profile and go find someone who will play with you, knowing that you're married. And contrary to what many people think, there are more than enough people on the site that aren't bothered.

Those who don't approve of the practice are more emotionally involved than those who aren't bothered, and threads like these very quickly transform to one full of expressions of disgust, name calling, etc etc.

No one group of people have the sole right to call themselves swingers. As far as I'm concerned, as long as you're on the site looking for NSA sex, then you're a swinger, regardless of your personal circumstances.

If we can only just respect each other's preferences, then we'll avoid all sorts of aggravation.

Infidelity has been going on since Adam was a lad. If it bothers you then don't meet people who are doing it. If you're playing without your partner's knowledge then respect the wishes of those who don't want to meet you and go find someone who will.

I think his point was, that many don't admit they have a wife or partner at home and claim to be single as they know it would hinder their success on here. These people are not likely to have the box ticked on their profile. Therefore rendering it a tad useless.

The only person I'm emotionally involved with is my boyfriend. The fact that I despise cheating and those who do it stems from a belief that people should treat each other with decency and respect, and not carry out a "practice" that they know would devastate someone else (who they usually laughingly claim to love.)"

Well, it still proves my point. If someone doesn't tell you they're married, you don't know they're married so how do you know not to trust what they say because they're already "lying to someone who they profess to love more than any other"?

If in the course of chatting with them you catch them in a lie, any lie whatsoever and not just the one about not mentioning that they're married, then it will be up to you to decide how you want to proceed.

If you don't meet married people playing away, then you end it the moment you catch them out in the lie. If it doesn't bother you but then still catch them in the lie, then you should seriously consider calling it all off. And you'll be doing so because they lied to you about something, it could be anything, and not because they turned out to be married.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Maybe there should be another tick box in people's profile saying "will meet married."

Everyone's entitled to their opinions and if they won't meet married people, then that must be respected. By the same token people that will meet married or are married themselves is completely their choice and should be respected. I think if people are married and playing away, they should be upfront about it though. Then people can make an informed choice.

.... nice in theory, but that would only work if someone was telling the truth, relying on someone that is likely to be already lying behind the back of the person they profess to love more than any other... why believe them now?

so kind of warped irony in there.......

I don't see any warped irony here at all.

Someone tells you they're married and playing without their partner's knowledge. If you don't meet married people then you've got all the information you need to say "No". I don't see how the fact that they're lying to "someone who they profess to love more than any other", as you put it, affects anything from there on.

If you're not bothered whether your playmates are married or not, then the "lying to someone who they profess to love more than any other" will be of no consequence.

My main issue with threads like these is that they even come up at all.

If you can't find a playmate if you're playing whilst married, then you'll have no success either if you're single.

The site is full of people with all sorts of preferences. Leave those alone that don't play with someone with your profile and go find someone who will play with you, knowing that you're married. And contrary to what many people think, there are more than enough people on the site that aren't bothered.

Those who don't approve of the practice are more emotionally involved than those who aren't bothered, and threads like these very quickly transform to one full of expressions of disgust, name calling, etc etc.

No one group of people have the sole right to call themselves swingers. As far as I'm concerned, as long as you're on the site looking for NSA sex, then you're a swinger, regardless of your personal circumstances.

If we can only just respect each other's preferences, then we'll avoid all sorts of aggravation.

Infidelity has been going on since Adam was a lad. If it bothers you then don't meet people who are doing it. If you're playing without your partner's knowledge then respect the wishes of those who don't want to meet you and go find someone who will."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I think people's attitudes spoil it on here and not just for married attached but for everyone. "

Agreed. I had some knob message me about my alleged cheating. Really abusive. He read my situation all wrong and apologised once I had explained but too little too late. People are quick to assume and are quick to judge. Hubby knows I play, there are reasons which I am not going into. The irony makes me lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Maybe there should be another tick box in people's profile saying "will meet married."

Everyone's entitled to their opinions and if they won't meet married people, then that must be respected. By the same token people that will meet married or are married themselves is completely their choice and should be respected. I think if people are married and playing away, they should be upfront about it though. Then people can make an informed choice.

.... nice in theory, but that would only work if someone was telling the truth, relying on someone that is likely to be already lying behind the back of the person they profess to love more than any other... why believe them now?

so kind of warped irony in there.......

I don't see any warped irony here at all.

Someone tells you they're married and playing without their partner's knowledge. If you don't meet married people then you've got all the information you need to say "No". I don't see how the fact that they're lying to "someone who they profess to love more than any other", as you put it, affects anything from there on.

If you're not bothered whether your playmates are married or not, then the "lying to someone who they profess to love more than any other" will be of no consequence.

My main issue with threads like these is that they even come up at all.

If you can't find a playmate if you're playing whilst married, then you'll have no success either if you're single.

The site is full of people with all sorts of preferences. Leave those alone that don't play with someone with your profile and go find someone who will play with you, knowing that you're married. And contrary to what many people think, there are more than enough people on the site that aren't bothered.

Those who don't approve of the practice are more emotionally involved than those who aren't bothered, and threads like these very quickly transform to one full of expressions of disgust, name calling, etc etc.

No one group of people have the sole right to call themselves swingers. As far as I'm concerned, as long as you're on the site looking for NSA sex, then you're a swinger, regardless of your personal circumstances.

If we can only just respect each other's preferences, then we'll avoid all sorts of aggravation.

Infidelity has been going on since Adam was a lad. If it bothers you then don't meet people who are doing it. If you're playing without your partner's knowledge then respect the wishes of those who don't want to meet you and go find someone who will."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Speaking personally its a time thing for me, married guys just tend to be after quickies that he can sneak in and that's not what I'm after, i like long sessions with guys who are not clock watching and have to ne home by pub kicking out time

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Have a single profile with my partners knowledge. It's also stated on the profile and those that do want meet fully know that everything is out in the open.

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By *ancs MinxWoman
over a year ago

Burnley


"Speaking personally its a time thing for me, married guys just tend to be after quickies that he can sneak in and that's not what I'm after, i like long sessions with guys who are not clock watching and have to ne home by pub kicking out time"

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By *oodyshere2011Man
over a year ago

Midlands

People don't want the potential hassle that it could bring and the fact that if someone was married and playing around outside without that person knowing ..... You should really consider where you are with that relationship.....

P.s .... Jewel ...... that's a damn fine ass

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Speaking personally, i just don't want to meet liars.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If playing away without consent.....then it's not really swinging!

He didn't mention anything about swinging "

Then why does he have a profile on here duh?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 19/08/14 00:54:10]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Your profile doesn't mention you are married so why do you have a problem getting meets ?"

Soon becomes obvious of they are though through interaction

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By *ub... girlWoman
over a year ago

worcester

It wouldn't bother me, married or not.....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I am confused as about 6 posts in the OP says people are being judgemental yes about people who cheat . I do not see at any point where the OP is directly identified as the cheat to any of the posts berating these people .

I may have missed it but maybe if the OP had answered granny_crumpets question about 4 down then he wouldnt of jumped ot the conclusion everything was pointed at himself rather than general opinion.

Peoples wording can be interpreted differently and I did not see a post where any person said OP YOUR A BASTARD FOR CHEATING !! I saw lots that say people who cheat are bastards though .

Just a thought maybe some thicker skins required ??

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By *teamycpl2000Couple
over a year ago

Hemel Hempstead

We agree this is a joint thing and honesty is the key, its already a mind field trying to find a good meet.

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