FabSwingers.com forum: We feel swinging has lost its spark

By *quirtyfun69 OP Couple
over a year ago

Burnley

When we first started this last year we were enjoying the club visits and the socials and fun that came with it, now we are not feeling it so much, anyone else had this and what to do to overcome it

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By *reyToTheFairiesWoman
over a year ago

Carlisle usually

Take a break. Come back when you're enthusiastic about it again

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By *inky Biscuit DunkerMan
over a year ago

Gloucestershire

I take regular breaks from fab. As soon as i feel I'm getting bored or, fed up with it all, i bugger off for a while.

Only just come back after several months away and feel more energised.

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By *ornywelsh2sumCouple
over a year ago

Neath valley.

"When we first started this last year we were enjoying the club visits and the socials and fun that came with it, now we are not feeling it so much, anyone else had this and what to do to overcome it

We only play now and again anyway but we took a break for 4mths as fab cam be overwhelming on times. Take time out doing vanilla stuff to reboot your enthusiasm.

Mrs

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Fab is dead now so quiet nothing happening

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I take regular breaks from fab. As soon as i feel I'm getting bored or, fed up with it all, i bugger off for a while.

Only just come back after several months away and feel more energised. "
definitely this

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By *quirtyfun69 OP Couple
over a year ago

Burnley

"Fab is dead now so quiet nothing happening "

We agree no one meets whether socials or fun, clubs are dying of death

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By *ornywelsh2sumCouple
over a year ago

Neath valley.

"Fab is dead now so quiet nothing happening "

Not really.we been offered quite a few meets but at this time we cannot meet due to vanilla stuff and childcare.

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By *rincess-PeachWoman
over a year ago

irrelevant

Clubs are not dying a death. I've seen them get busier and more varied. Defo look about at different places

I did find it more exciting in the first year and kinda enjoyed playing about. Nowadays it's more quality connections and doing more exciting things but with the same people which is a lot more fun

Hope you find more Sparks

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By *ornywelsh2sumCouple
over a year ago

Neath valley.

"Fab is dead now so quiet nothing happening

We agree no one meets whether socials or fun, clubs are dying of death "

To be honest i Joanne find clubs clicky and cold. Unless you are part of the it crowd.

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By *quirtyfun69 OP Couple
over a year ago

Burnley

"Fab is dead now so quiet nothing happening

We agree no one meets whether socials or fun, clubs are dying of death

To be honest i Joanne find clubs clicky and cold. Unless you are part of the it crowd."

We've found it too at certain clubs, proper put us off.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Fab is dead now so quiet nothing happening "

We don’t find it quiet at all and could have a meet every couple of weeks if we had the time and inclination. Fab is what you make it .

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By *ustusboth2013Couple
over a year ago

Birmingham

"When we first started this last year we were enjoying the club visits and the socials and fun that came with it, now we are not feeling it so much, anyone else had this and what to do to overcome it

It’s one of those things that becomes a fad for one, a box ticker and experience for another and a lifestyle for others. There’s no right or wrong in what your journey is.

For us, it’s a lifestyle choice and over the years we’ve fortunately been quite aligned (two people to consider along the way) and the lifestyle has meant there’s been times it’s been a social life, other times weekend breaks away from home, times where horn levels have been high that we’ve just wanted pure filth, and then times where we’ve created these great friendship bubbles and had spouts where we’ve spent time as good friends socialising and fucking. We’ve done clubs tours, house parties, regular kickbacks and swinging holidays.

I think for us, keeping the diversity in the swinging lifestyle has kept it fresh and fun. Sometimes doing quirky things along the way has added to the excitement.

Last year was one of our busiest swinging periods. We did a club tour which meant we visited 28 clubs across three countries (would have been 5 but Lizzie let me down by having to work

) and frequented them around 130 times. This includes a couple of months in the canaries. As a polar opposite, this year has been one of our quietists years, due to new jobs and shift patterns throwing even our vanilla life all over the place.

As such, I think we’ve kind of felt like yourselves and when we’ve been out, felt a bit bored and lost the spark of swinging.

That said, new jobs and more normal Monday to Friday 9x5 will change our life again, change our mentality and the spark may come back.

We did go to Gran Canaria in April and Tenerife in August and hit the clubs (but not as much as usual).

We go again in two weeks, so maybe this might fire up the Quattro again knowing work patterns change and the spark will return.

So our advice would be to maybe consider doing something different in swinging that may sound appealing.

Without sounding like we’re on the Canary Islands tourist board, maybe try a long weekend or a week in Playa del Ingles. First and foremost, it’s a holiday resort, but a liberal and tolerant one with plenty of swinging venues. Maybe a good few days away from the normality of home, the sun, the cocktails, the relaxed holiday vibe and the simplicity of meeting new people and making friends, heading for drinks and then a club for a dance and filth might just reignite the appetite.

You might even make some great friends who you visit on your return to Blighty to keep that enjoyment going. Or even think, we might just have a once or twice a year visit to PDI for a bit of swinging on holiday fun and not bother in the UK. That’s what some swingers do also.

Hope this gives you some food for thought and good luck with whichever route you go down.

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By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple
over a year ago

Leeds

I have this quite often, it's far from a lifestyle for us and more a pop in and out as we feel.

When I'm not feeling it we just don't look to meet, we did remove our profile a couple of years back and came back again, ATM I just scroll the forums and don't actively search meets out.

The initial excitement I guess it's normal for it to wear off when it becomes the norm and no longer something new & exciting.

I enjoy the social side a lot so I'm around for that.

Mrs

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By *aomilatteCouple
over a year ago

Midlands

"Fab is dead now so quiet nothing happening

We agree no one meets whether socials or fun, clubs are dying of death "

Which club's are "dying of death"? The club's we've been to this year have been packed.

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By *isfits behaving badlyCouple
over a year ago

Coventry

We got into a bit of a club rut. We used to travel all over looking for new clubs when we started. But we found our favourite Club and another that is incredibly convenient. So the last few years we've mainly been going to these two clubs. Which is fine especially when one if your favourite. However we found ourselves just getting a bit too familiar, seeing the same faces and maybe getting a little lacking on the effort. Our approach is very chilled and the social side is the main aspect for us. We have a great sex life and other hobbies and intrests outside of the scene. We are a bit picky. We've never liked anything that felt laboured. When we meet the right people we just like things to flow naturally to the bedroom. However it's probably fair to say being very comfortable with each other We've not alway been putting in the effort to nourish good potential swinging opportunities into the bedroom. I don't think it helps when you become over familiar with a club or see the same people all the time.

So we challenged our selves to try more new clubs this year. It has reignited a club spark. There's nerves of walking into a new club, meeting totally new people and making a real effort to present well. It's really refreshing just to be in a new environment with new people and the sense of new adventures. And we just have more buzz and excitement about clubs (like the old days). Our favourite club is still our favourite and the other club still convenient. We will still be going to these clubs. However we now know there are some other clubs we like, there's more to explore and it's really good to mix it up and go to a selection of clubs (even when they may not be your favourite). Plus when we go to our favourite it just feels a bit more exciting and fresh again.

It's made us focus a little more again on what else maybe out there for us apart from clubs. Maybe try going to more parties and more specifically parties of people we don't know from the scene. Maybe try meeting strangers from here. Maybe try a spontaneous meet.

No doubt the spark will go a bit again. Like I said swinging isn't the only thing in our life and it has to share our life with other things. I think this is probably normal for most people. We may chill out from the scene at times but it's always something we enjoy. And it's always something we like from a social aspect even if we are being shit swingers. However we also know now if we want get more active just mix it up a bit.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We're on an extended break and we're not sure we'll go back to playing, we had a good run at it for around 10 years and we think it's run its course but we keep the profile hidden rather that delete just incase.

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