FabSwingers.com forum: A slap on the butt

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

The situation

In a swingers club and someone you don't know walks past and smacks your butt and says very nice then walks away.

What would you do?

Take it as a compliment or tell them off for breaking the no touching without consent rule?

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By *ixey and CopperCouple
over a year ago

Exeter

It's sexual assault

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yeah reality is it is sexual assault and not on.

Of course if a hot woman did it to me personally I would love it, but I've had men do it before to me and it's not cool

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yeah not cool, they’d get thrown out I am sure if you reported it

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By *eaSlutsCouple
over a year ago

Glasgow

I'd personally tell them to fuck off, no matter how attractive etc they may be.

If they're in a swingers club and aren't engaging consensually, then that's a big red flag and could be grounds for highlighting to the club owners. At the end of the day, an uninvited smack on the bum could be considered sexual harassment regardless of the environment it took place in.

It's also just lazy "flirting". Come chat first then, if we click, butt touching can come later on.

C x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No consent = Sexual harassment

I would of told the club hosts & out the guy who did it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm likely to punch them if they slapped my arse

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By *ister_ee_1981Man
over a year ago

Sunniest Exeter...

"Of course if a hot woman did it to me personally I would love it, but I've had men do it before to me and it's not cool"

Apologies for hijacking, but we need to be careful of this attitude guys. No matter who does it to who, and how "hot" they are, the response should be the same.

Being "hot" shouldnt give you the right to be exempt from the law... Stay frosty guys, and know your worth!

In answer to OP, yes, report,unless it could have been accidental, (busy club etc) but based on the example it was deliberate.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Of course if a hot woman did it to me personally I would love it, but I've had men do it before to me and it's not cool

Apologies for hijacking, but we need to be careful of this attitude guys. No matter who does it to who, and how "hot" they are, the response should be the same.

Being "hot" shouldnt give you the right to be exempt from the law... Stay frosty guys, and know your worth!

In answer to OP, yes, report,unless it could have been accidental, (busy club etc) but based on the example it was deliberate."

Not hijacking at all. The situation is open for a male or female to have their bottom smacked.

Interested in gauging how people who feel. However we do agree with staying frosty

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Of course if a hot woman did it to me personally I would love it, but I've had men do it before to me and it's not cool

Apologies for hijacking, but we need to be careful of this attitude guys. No matter who does it to who, and how "hot" they are, the response should be the same.

Being "hot" shouldnt give you the right to be exempt from the law... Stay frosty guys, and know your worth!

In answer to OP, yes, report,unless it could have been accidental, (busy club etc) but based on the example it was deliberate."

Finding someone hot is a personal thing though right. And the person doing it may think themselves as hot, but they don't know thats how the reciever is gonna perceive it.

All in all yes, it is assault and no one should do it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"The situation

In a swingers club and someone you don't know walks past and smacks your butt and says very nice then walks away.

What would you do?

Take it as a compliment or tell them off for breaking the no touching without consent rule?

I’m gonna have to against the tide here. I’d probably take it as a compliment

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By *oxy jWoman
over a year ago

somerset

they would get a slap and then a rollicking ... as others have said its sexual assault just because we swing im no ones free piece of meet and just because we are in a swingers club dont mean the law of consent no longer applies

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If a stranger did it in public outside of a club how would you take it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

In rios when I used to go, even with a male friend etc some of the men there would try to get handsy with me and I always had to firmly say NO! It kind of puts you off going to those kind of things.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If a stranger did it in public outside of a club how would you take it "

Something similar happens to me all the time at bars on a night out, I just don’t feel it’s a big deal to me

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By *edplusoneCouple
over a year ago

West Midlands

Mr had lots of uninvited smacks on his bottom at Halloween, but his arse was hanging out and it was taken as a bit of fun and he enjoyed the attention. But as a woman a definite no-no! xx

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By *he_Last_TitanMan
over a year ago

Bristol

"Yeah reality is it is sexual assault and not on.

Of course if a hot woman did it to me personally I would love it, but I've had men do it before to me and it's not cool"

You can’t have it both ways - it’s either a sexual assault or it is not.

That you might be able to romanticise it (if the ‘right’ person does it) is meaningless.

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By *he_Last_TitanMan
over a year ago

Bristol

"Mr had lots of uninvited smacks on his bottom at Halloween, but his arse was hanging out and it was taken as a bit of fun and he enjoyed the attention. But as a woman a definite no-no! xx"

Just out of interest, Is that how you personally feel or are you suggestion that it different when the ‘victim’ is female?

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By *hePerkyPumpkinTV/TS
over a year ago

Bristol

"The situation

In a swingers club and someone you don't know walks past and smacks your butt and says very nice then walks away.

What would you do?

Take it as a compliment or tell them off for breaking the no touching without consent rule?

That's a total violation of consent, you can't be putting hands on people without their permission. It's as simple as that.

I would be too awkward to tell them off. I know I should, but I probably wont.

However, if for some reason I happened to be very attracted to this consent violating ass slapper I might (in my weakness) quite like it even though I know that what they did was wrong.

This is just me though. Consent must always be taken seriously.

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By *ananaman41Man
over a year ago

Dublin

"No consent = Sexual harassment

I would of told the club hosts & out the guy who did it "

Who said anything about it being a guy?

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By *entlemanFoxMan
over a year ago

North East / London

"The situation

In a swingers club and someone you don't know walks past and smacks your butt and says very nice then walks away.

What would you do?

Take it as a compliment or tell them off for breaking the no touching without consent rule?

The latter, clearly unacceptable conduct.

In a nuance to this:

You say to a lady, as a throw away remark: "if you don't behave I'll spank your bottom". She says nothing, but turns bends over and proffers her arse towards you.

Would you slap it in that circumstance? I didn't, but curious as to what others think?

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By *uncouplerkCouple
over a year ago

We’d take it as a compliment. We get both sides but we’re cool with it x

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By *asepaul71Man
over a year ago

Buxton

Not visited a club (yet) but I do think it would be wrong to just slap someone arse without having consent. Maybe a coloured wrist band could indicate what you are open for/consent to.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We’d take it as a compliment. We get both sides but we’re cool with it x"

Yep same here

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By *ig1gaz1Man
over a year ago

bradford

in the ops case io wouldnt do it.

In another case i did slap her bum however during forum chat id said via a forum thread that i would get her and got the usual gossip that i wouldnt.

so I slapped her bum at her party to which she turned around and said its my turn.

so i had to stand up infront of everyone else and have my arse slapped thats what i thought.

instead she got the whip out and i got that instead.

the first shot she missed and hit my side whilst the second shot hit its mark.

whilst both shots stung like hell was it worth it yes had many fun times and chays over the years with this couple.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Genuine interest here as it sparked a discussion on Friday.

On a man it's ok but a woman not?

Does it make a difference is the ass is exposed or not?

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By *eaSlutsCouple
over a year ago

Glasgow

"Genuine interest here as it sparked a discussion on Friday.

On a man it's ok but a woman not?

Does it make a difference is the ass is exposed or not?"

I would say it's not acceptable, regardless of gender. There's an idea that men would potentially like it but, speaking as a man, I would be fuming. Not respecting consent is inexcusable.

It absolutely doesn't make a difference if the person's ass is exposed or not. It's still harassment. That reeks of the old "well what do they expect it if they're going out dressed like that" argument that people seem fond of when discussing sexual violence/harassment. People just need to know they should keep their hands to themselves, unless invited to do otherwise.

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By *hil EwanMan
over a year ago

Shakerley Mere

I would take it as a compliment... Although, I'd prefer a firm grope over a slap

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I would take it as a compliment... Although, I'd prefer a firm grope over a slap

Yeah a hard slap might be a bit much

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By *ananaman41Man
over a year ago

Dublin

"Genuine interest here as it sparked a discussion on Friday.

On a man it's ok but a woman not?

Does it make a difference is the ass is exposed or not?"

No thats not it. Its just that some men might actually encourage it. Women rarely would

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By *abs..Woman
over a year ago

Touch me without consent and there will be trouble.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Dora is a Krav Maga practitioner and hates having her bum smacked

I wouldn’t need to do anything but enjoy the show

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If she’s hot I’ll ask her what that mouth do and continue from there

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By *orphia2003Woman
over a year ago

Tonypandy.

Not quite the same, but at my last chams visit someone grabbed my cock while I was wearing it.

He got a slap and a very firm ' do not touch without permission'

Several people seemed surprised at my reaction. But, My cock attached to my body = my property. I don't care that it's made of silicone. It's my cock.

Didn't report it, but the guy was taken to one side and warned that touching a person or thier property is unacceptable.

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By *ackbydemandMan
over a year ago

Leicester

I have a very strict permission policy that I can't play with anyone without consent. That should be in place for anyone and any woman that touched me without getting that permission would be asked not to do it again. I'm not a piece of meat and I know my worth.

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By *agneto.Man
over a year ago

Bham

That is very wrong. Even more wrong than if they did that in a normal club.

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By *ddfellowMan
over a year ago

Newferry, wirral

"We’d take it as a compliment. We get both sides but we’re cool with it x

Yep same here "

me too

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By *razytimesinloveCouple
over a year ago

SW Scotland

Fair game to take a slap in the face in return

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By *lueyes69Man
over a year ago

coventry

I was in pub other wk leaning on chair and next minute my ass gets a slap turn round was a woman I know. She said don’t know what come over me lol . My ass must have been inviting

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By *ndianLuxCouple
over a year ago

West midlands

"The situation

In a swingers club and someone you don't know walks past and smacks your butt and says very nice then walks away.

What would you do?

Kick on his balls . Simples

Take it as a compliment or tell them off for breaking the no touching without consent rule?

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By *edHeelsCplCouple
over a year ago

Kenilworth

That is simply unacceptable behaviour. Assault

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Really good to see others thoughts on this.

The group we were with were a little divided like this thread but it does seem the general vibe is that of what we were saying and that this should not happen

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I know most have said it is sexual assault but it is plain and simple Assault, it is "unwanted physical contact" which is classed as Assault. Sexual or not it isn't right...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Dora is a Krav Maga practitioner and hates having her bum smacked

I wouldn’t need to do anything but enjoy the show

Does that come with falafel?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Touch me without consent and there will be trouble. "

But you said that was ok behind the bikesheds in 1982! Has that expired?..

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By *sBlueWoman
over a year ago

Up North

"I'm likely to punch them if they slapped my arse"

Me too

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By *tuYorksMan
over a year ago

Barnsley

"The situation

In a swingers club and someone you don't know walks past and smacks your butt and says very nice then walks away.

What would you do?

Take it as a compliment or tell them off for breaking the no touching without consent rule?

You've got to be pretty full of yourself to do that. I would, quite rightly,expect a slap.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"The situation

In a swingers club and someone you don't know walks past and smacks your butt and says very nice then walks away.

What would you do?

Take it as a compliment or tell them off for breaking the no touching without consent rule?

Can I ask another question to this post.

Ladies would you feel 1)feel comfortable/confident enough to confront this person or to speak to whoever is in charge. 2) if there with your partner and they saw what happened would you want them to step in and lay down the law (so to speak).

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By *ohn KanakaMan
over a year ago

Not all that North of North London

"Genuine interest here as it sparked a discussion on Friday.

On a man it's ok but a woman not?

I have had women put their hand up my kilt, trust me callingvoutbacwiman on a packed club doesn't go down well.

Everyone's gut reaction to any sort of confrontation is to assume that the man is in the wrong

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