FabSwingers.com forum: What they say and what they mean lol

By *omorebull OP Couple
over a year ago

gateshead

We’ve noticed the same strap lines and the same patter pop up in ad after ad over the years so thought it would be amusing to “translate” some of the lines you read into what they actually mean. Please feel free to add!!

“Looking for a girl to fuck my bf so he can tell me about it”

Meaning…” I’m a single bloke who thinks he’ll have a better chance if someone thinks they’ll be fulfilling a fantasy”

“Experienced male wants to introduce shy female to the lifestyle”

Meaning…”I want to play and she wants nothing to do with it”

“Must send facepic and we will return”

Meaning…”I can’t cum just looking at tits and fannies and if I had a facepic I wouldn’t send it anyway..I don’t want to be recognised!”

“Male half bi curious”

Meaning…”I’ll say anything to get a meet with a couple but if I do, I’m not touching cocks”

“Male straight but don’t mind contact in the heat of the moment”

Meaning…”Touch me with that thing and we’re fighting”

“We are a couple who can’t accommodate”

Meaning…”We are a couple with a wife and husband who will kill us if they find out”

“Looks aren’t important”

Meaning….”you’d better be Brad and Angelina, even though we look like Wayne and Waynetta”

“No limits”

Meaning…”see the long list of things she won’t do but I’d love to do”

“Social meet first”

Meaning…”I haven’t told her I’ve put us on a swinging site but there’s a chance she might like the couple”

“We only play as a couple “

Meaning…”Unless you offer to let me shag your lass”

More to come!!

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By *straightguys4uMan
over a year ago

bromley

Single lady looking for BI males -

I’m a guy

I don’t give out my KIK or WhatsApp

I’m a guy

Cuck couple, hubby wants to chat about wife

I’m BI and she doesn’t know

more to come

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By *omorebull OP Couple
over a year ago

gateshead

“Gloryhole available..all welcome”

Meaning…”Must send age and facepic. Oh and be female”

“Wife/gf recovering from Ill health/covid/operation”

Meaning..”Don’t be surprised when I turn up without her”

“Only meet local”

Meaning…”our last couples meet was a 200 mile drive away..and it turned out to be a single bloke who’s wife was in hospital”

“Experienced Dom Master”

Meaning “single bloke who’s read 50 Shades Of Grey while wanking but came before I finished it”

“Same room fun”

Meaning…”if it looks like my lass is enjoying it too much, I’ll stop it”

“Separate room fun”

Meaning “I’ll be trying to shag your lass…you’ll be lucky if you get a halfhearted wank”

More to come

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

Can lick for hours = I have nothing else in my repertoire

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Wanna see pics of my wife and talk about her

Means I’m a single male and I will use fake pictures of a female just to talk to another male and get off over it

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By *omorebull OP Couple
over a year ago

gateshead

“I know it says “no single males” but I just thought I’d ask

Meaning…”I can’t read….all the blood in my brain has been diverted to my cock”

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"“I know it says “no single males” but I just thought I’d ask

Meaning…”I can’t read….all the blood in my brain has been diverted to my cock”"

Let me turn that one round

No single males = either we can't be bothered to set message filters or we enjoy getting loads of messages we just don't want to meet you

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By *9Karm69Man
over a year ago

plymouth/chesterfield

"“I know it says “no single males” but I just thought I’d ask

Meaning…”I can’t read….all the blood in my brain has been diverted to my cock”

Let me turn that one round

No single males = either we can't be bothered to set message filters or we enjoy getting loads of messages we just don't want to meet you"

But just read some of there verifications upon where a single male has verified them

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By *omorebull OP Couple
over a year ago

gateshead

“I’m in your area at the moment”

Meaning…”or I can be in eight hours if you’re daft enough to say yes”

“No pillow princesses”

Meaning..”our lass won’t be bothered to do anything so if you don’t, nothings gonna happen”

“Good sense of humour”

Meaning …“you’ll need it when you see our bed linen”

“Want to show hubby what he’s missing”

Meaning …”if he wasn’t up to his nuts in my younger sister “

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By *9Karm69Man
over a year ago

plymouth/chesterfield

"Not here to sleep with everyone"

Meaning: Checkout 100s of veris

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By *ackFromTheDead2Man
over a year ago

London/Surrey

"Can lick for hours = I have nothing else in my repertoire "

Is the camera on me

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By *straightguys4uMan
over a year ago

bromley

Fab my pics for a chance to meet me.

= attention seeker with no intention of meeting anyone.

Looking for 2 guys for MFM today

= I’ve never met anyone from Fabs.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Will fill in later

= I don't have anything interesting to say and you'll not find me interesting when you meet me.

Looking for BBC only

= I won't be able to fit you in anywhere, I just want to see if what they say is right.

Looking for outdoor fun

= partner and kids at home oblivious to this, I've been banned from every hotel and B&B within 100 miles for leaving the room a mess and can't go to local places because I'll be recognised.

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By *ain and sortedMan
over a year ago

Old Harlow Essex

Fab straight =I love cock haha

I'm free now, can u accom=need to unload my lorry in your area

My fb wants cock =I mean I do

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By *wesomeLolaCouple
over a year ago

Peterborough and Buckinghamshire

NO PICS AND /OR NO VERIFICATIONS - INSTANT DELETE AND BLOCK......., DON'T WASTE YOUR OR OUR TIME

means

We only have one pic on our profile but we'd like to see all of yours.

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By *all me FlikWoman
over a year ago

Galaxy Far Far Away

I know I'm out of your age range but = I've read your profile but I'm choosing to ignore what it says.

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By *omorebull OP Couple
over a year ago

gateshead

“We are a couple who are now open to playing separately”

Meaning….”I wouldn’t let single blokes touch her before but now she’s not playing, I’m not getting any”

“420 friendly”

Meaning….”We have breath that would knock a fly off a bucket of shit at thirty paces and anything you do to us will be technically illegal as we will be unconscious”

“We don’t do the 3 P’s”

Meaning…Pleasant, Punctual and Participate

“Anyone who uses our pictures is in violation of the (insert spurious law here) Act of 1875 and we will press for the death penalty if you pass off Julie’s nipple as your own”

Meaning…”we are terrified you’ll speak to us in Tescos if we are with our actual wife/husband

“We love Taboo”

Meaning…or Malibu. Or Vodka. Or Meths. Or Kestrel lager…we don’t care as long as you’re providing it. Sexually, we’re as exciting as Songs of Praise. Oh and you’ll have to pay for a taxi back for us and Julie will probably honk up in it.

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By *9Karm69Man
over a year ago

plymouth/chesterfield

"“We are a couple who are now open to playing separately”

Meaning….”I wouldn’t let single blokes touch her before but now she’s not playing, I’m not getting any”

“420 friendly”

Meaning….”We have breath that would knock a fly off a bucket of shit at thirty paces and anything you do to us will be technically illegal as we will be unconscious”

“We don’t do the 3 P’s”

Meaning…Pleasant, Punctual and Participate

“Anyone who uses our pictures is in violation of the (insert spurious law here) Act of 1875 and we will press for the death penalty if you pass off Julie’s nipple as your own”

Meaning…”we are terrified you’ll speak to us in Tescos if we are with our actual wife/husband

“We love Taboo”

Just love the 3 Ps above, pmsl

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By *ornyvirginphxWoman
over a year ago

phoenix

Haha I’d have to disagree on the kik/WhatsApp. I don’t give these out as a female - a) I don’t share personal info (like phone numbers) and b) I don’t like to give just anyone that kind of access. Easier to keep it here until a connection is established

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By *isstinseltoesWoman
over a year ago

Calderdale innit

I've been here before, know the score -Left in a strop cos I couldn't get meets.

Not like other men -I'm exactly like them ,but trying to look better to get a shag.

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By *omorebull OP Couple
over a year ago

gateshead

“Just looking for a coffee and a chat”

Meaning…after a sympathy shag

“I have my partner’s permission to play solo”

Meaning…”providing she never finds out and you’ll never get the chance to ask her”

“She” will probably send a message on here saying “Hi, it’s me…the female half…Jimmy has my permission to play” and given the naive trusting people we are on here, we’ll go “ok”.

Not.

“She always sends me on a meet first to make sure the couple are genuine before she plays”

Meaning …“You may just be as stupid as I think you look”

“We never give out our number even to confirm a meet but our address is 920 Short Lane…just knock and we will answer”

Meaning…” I haven’t harassed the ex wife since my last restraining order…I’ll let these saps do it for me “

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By *ad boy maverickMan
over a year ago

basildon

PMSL @ALL THE ABOVE.

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By *bwgirlygirlWoman
over a year ago

Glasgow

Looking to meet and fuck my tight ass now

Meaning- message for a link to my only fans

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By *omorebull OP Couple
over a year ago

gateshead

"Looking to meet and fuck my tight ass now

Meaning- message for a link to my only fans "

Taking advantage of a d*unk donkey is the lowest of the low

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By *he Happy ManMan
over a year ago

Merseyside

"Looking to meet and fuck my tight ass now

Meaning- message for a link to my only fans

Taking advantage of a d*unk donkey is the lowest of the low"

Sadly some women come into Fab chat to persuade guys to go on a pay site to see them on cam.

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By *he Happy ManMan
over a year ago

Merseyside

From a couple's profile. Tell me what you would do to my wife if we met/wife wants to know what you would do to her if we met.

He is a married guy whose wife doesn’t know he is on here. As soon as he hears what you would do and cums as he masturbates you will never hear from him again.

I want to swap pics of my wife.

My wife has no idea I am on Fab doing this and would be horrified. Pics are her naked and asleep.

Fab this pic of my pussy if you would like to lick it. Fab this pic if you would like to fuck me.

I just want fabs.

I am not like other men on here. I hate the way some men on Fab treat women.

I am playing the white knight in shining armour and hope slagging off other single men will help me get a meet.

I am happy to meet you and just give you oral sex.

I think you are stupid. I hope after giving you oral sex you will want penetrative sex and want to suck my cock.

I can lick for hours.

I think women love guys staying down there for ages. I think saying I can lick for hours will get me meets.

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By *ad boy maverickMan
over a year ago

basildon

I love hairy pussy,

I love plus size women,

= I love anything that'll get me a shag.

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By *straightguys4uMan
over a year ago

bromley

I’m not looking to fuck my way through this site

= I’m not meeting anybody.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

single cuck profiles = single men in fantasy land

single guy profile share wife pics = not married fake pics

cuckold couples where cuck does all the typing and chatting = single wannabe

single male profiles that talk about swinging with there wives = they have no wives

thing list can go on and on lol

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By *omorebull OP Couple
over a year ago

gateshead

“This is now a joint account”

Meaning…”Just the male”

“So you can be as dirty as you like and we can both read it”

Meaning…”Just the male…I need a wank”

“Don’t like being called babe or hun”

Meaning…”Just the male and it creeps me out while I’m having a wank”

“I’m coming off Fab”

Meaning “I couldn’t score in a brothel with a hundred pound note tied round my bell end”

“Just here for social chat”

Meaning…”Just here for social validation…pleeeze like me!!! Pleeeze!!”

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By *isstinseltoesWoman
over a year ago

Calderdale innit

Quality over quantity -i'm trying to make it look like I wouldn't shag the whole site if I got the chance.Or I'm having a go at others who have had more meets.

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By *batMan
over a year ago

Alicante, Spain. (Sometimes in Wales)

Bogus legalese warning blah blah blah "will result in legal action." = Has no idea what legal action entails or how it would actually work.

Gbat

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Wonder what my profile says about me then as nothing you guys have said is on my profile

Thinking ………

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By *batMan
over a year ago

Alicante, Spain. (Sometimes in Wales)

Wonder what my profile says about me then as nothing you guys have said is on my profile = Look at my profile!!!

(Not meant to be nasty, just thought it was a bit funny)

Gbat

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"Wonder what my profile says about me then as nothing you guys have said is on my profile

Thinking ………"

It says you're an all round decent guy who actually smiles

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Wonder what my profile says about me then as nothing you guys have said is on my profile = Look at my profile!!!

(Not meant to be nasty, just thought it was a bit funny)

Gbat "

Had to try my luck lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Wonder what my profile says about me then as nothing you guys have said is on my profile

Thinking ………

It says you're an all round decent guy who actually smiles

I try my best that’s all I can offer

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By *omorebull OP Couple
over a year ago

gateshead

"Wonder what my profile says about me then as nothing you guys have said is on my profile = Look at my profile!!!

(Not meant to be nasty, just thought it was a bit funny)

Gbat

You were doing well and then you said

Had to try my luck lol

Nothing infuriates a couple more than starting their ad with

No single males please

No single males

NO SINGLE MALES

Then a guy says

“I know you said no single males but I thought I’d try my luck”

Meaning….”I don’t give a flying fuck what you want…I want my hole and I’m desperate enough to try anything”

I’m sure you’re not like that…..

Had to try my luck lol"

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By *9Karm69Man
over a year ago

plymouth/chesterfield

NO SINGLE MEN. NO EXCEPTIONS

= But please don't check my veris

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By *landfordfabbersCouple
over a year ago

Blandford ish

I will say we always have socials and are a true couple, because every time we have ignored the rule someone has lied to get themselves over…

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By *ain and sortedMan
over a year ago

Old Harlow Essex

Can't accommodate, can't travel= I don't want to meet

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By *ain and sortedMan
over a year ago

Old Harlow Essex

Back again, old profile, lost log in details=I got found out

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By *omorebull OP Couple
over a year ago

gateshead

“Social meet a must”

Meaning…”need to check you’re not a man”

“Go with the flow”

Meaning…”I don’t care if you’re a man”

“Seeking understanding and patient partner”

Meaning…”I used to be a man”

“Would like to meet a partner for club visits”

Meaning…”Where hopefully I’ll find someone better looking or dirtier than you”

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By *omorebull OP Couple
over a year ago

gateshead

“Rate my wife’s fanny”

Erm….going on the size, Council Tax Band H

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

OP's first thread on this post says

"Male straight but don’t mind contact in the heat of the moment”

Meaning…”Touch me with that thing and we’re fighting”

See, we reckon this could also mean, that he doesn't want to write that he's open to a little bi with another male if the action is going that way, because he's more straight in the outside world. Also being comfortable sucking/wanking another guy could potentially put off an actual straight guy if he wrote he was bicurious.

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By *omorebull OP Couple
over a year ago

gateshead

“I don’t give out my mobile number and only chat on here as my husband/ bf likes to read all the dirty messages about what you’d do to me”

Meaning ….”I don’t give out my mobile as if you rang it, you’d suss I’m actually a hairy arsed bloke who wants a wank and won’t shell out a fiver for a copy of Fiesta”

Let’s kill the mobile myth once and for all….

20 years ago, mobiles were expensive and you didn’t give out your number because you only had one and you might end up accidentally having a sexy text chat with the mother in law.

Now…..

Burners are a fiver from Cash Converters

Simcards are a pound from Poundland.

If you do get a sexpest who doesn’t take the hint on your phone, you burn the sim and get another.

“Oh but I’ve got so many contacts on my sim…”

Well done…you’re obviously doing better than 99.9 % of the rest of us on here.

It’s just an excuse. It’s a tired one. Busted.

Get a mobile for sexytime

Say you’ll want an immediate contact to establish that folks are at least the sex they say they are.

Immediately block those who come up with a cock and bull story (it’s amazing how many men are at home on Fab when all of their “wives” are out working….funny that, isn’t it?)

Do this, and you’ll get fewer contacts. The ones you do get though will be worth pursuing.

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