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Without couples would swinging exist?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

If folk can debate in a sensible and rational manner this thread will run it’s course quite happily so please leave your handbags at the door

The popular misconception amongst single folk involved in the swinging world is that they believe that they themselves are swingers. I believe all they really are is an addition, sometimes welcome and sometimes not to an already complicated lifestyle.

If you were to ask any of your non swinging friends to define swinging they would all without doubt tell you it’s about couples having sex with other couples. They may well expand on that to include single folk, parties and clubs etc but the basic premise is that swinging is a couples hobby.

I know it’s only Wiki but check the link below and you will see that whilst you may consider it just another generalisation it does lend credence to my statement above

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Swinging

If you were to remove all the couples from this site and leave it occupied by single folk only is it still a swingers site? Or is it simply another dating site?

If the site was only full of like minded couples seeking sexual encounters with other likeminded couples then I think we would agree that it was a swingers site. The blurring round the edges comes with the inclusion of single folk and all the other sexual variety’s.

If a couple decide they want, for what ever reason to include a single person in their sexual activities is that swinging?

If a single women on here contacts and meets a single guy on here, or the other way around is that swinging? IMHO and I do stress IMHO it's not as it's no different from meeting on any number of the popular dating web sites. If a man and women meet in a pub/club etc and end up having NSA casual sex they would never consider themselves as swingers, or would they? Ask your best mate the next time he/she pulls on a Saturday night if they considered what they had just enjoyed as swinging.

Two Bi guys or girls meet on here is that swinging or just another date, see above

Is dogging swinging or is it simply voyeuristic sex?

Is the Cuckold scenario swinging or just another sexual persuasion?

A group of young single folk all have sex together, lots of Vid's out there on College sex, is that swinging or an orgy?

A bunch of older single folk of here get together for a party is that swinging or an orgy?

Is web cam sex swinging or just another variation on the voyeur theme?

Is a gang bang swinging or an extension of the cuckold/orgy/voyeur theme?

The list is endless however what is as clear as a clear thing is that if you take single folk out of the swinging world swinging continues, albeit not to everyone’s satisfaction but take the couples out then swinging simply ceases to exist.

Maybe it’s time for this site to recognise this and make some changes to how we all conduct ourselves on here. The most often raised complaint is about unwanted or inappropriate emails and in the main these come from single folk.

Perhaps changing single folks access to the email system from what it currently is to receive and reply only, as this would stop the majority of the offenders in their tracks. It would in no way diminish the single folks chances of meeting but would put the selection process firmly in the hands of those couples looking for single folk to join them.

This simple change would also remove the ability of those who quite obviously use the site as just another dating agency or to perpetuate their infidelity.

Just some humble, if not rather opinionated thoughts which I hope will spark some lively debate, just try and keep it polite ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I believe that singles can call themselves swingers, as they are interested in meeting other singles or couples purely for the sexual experience. If they were meeting from a dating site then that generally, I would have thought, would be to make friends with a possible view to starting a relationshp.

I agree with you that if you were to ask joe public their definition of swinging then they would say it was swapping partners within a couple, but I think that's them thinking of the old "keys in the fruitbowl" scenario.

In my opinion, whoever is looking for swinging experiences, whether bi, gay or straight, then there is no reason why they shouldn't look here.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

To us swinging is one or more couples meeting up to have sex with each other.

Simple as that.

In the pre PC days it was called wife swapping,note the word swapping,which denotes that you have a partner to swap.

There may well have been singles involved at that time but we don't think they could be described as swingers,probably more like lucky guests.

When it comes to swinging being single is like being a cowboy without a horse.Sure there are times when you can go to the odd barndance or ho-down but there'll be more times when you'll be left in town while the rest are off riding the range.

You can't be a cowboy without a horse.

This might seem an odd analogy but its just a way of getting our point across,lol.

Trace & Ric

XXXX

XXXX

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i dont see how is singles can be called swingers when we dont have a partner to swap. same goes for couples only looking for a single for a 3sum and not another couple??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i always though swinging was an attutude not a number, i'm not sure even i'd class 1 on 1 between a man and a woman swinging but why can't 3sums be swinging? to me its more a state of mind, you can be a couple and have a swinging attitude and be a couple and just be after a quick shag like more of the single guys are accused of, we once met a couple many years ago, they came to our house and when they came in i offered them a drink and the man looked at me and said "we hav'nt come here to chat we're here to fuck"! so i told him to fuck off lol now to me even tho they a couple meeting another couple they was'nt swingers, they was a coupel just after a quickie, so with that in mind if you have the right frame of mind to do this anyone can be a swinger even couples who meet single men

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i just googled swinger and it came up with this

a person who engages freely in promiscuous sex

peanut

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i never really saw swinging as a couple thing anyway, you need more than couples to keep it going, everyone likes different, i don't meet women even as part of couples so without single men swinging would be dead for me lol lots of women like gang bangs where would they be without swinging? lots of women use sites like this to find other woman, to me thats all part of swinging too, and indeed men to find other men, i think to many people still have the idea that swinging is about throwing your keys in a pot and seeing whos wife you get, to me swinging runs far past two couples in a four sum or a couples party, but then i don't like the word swinging anyway i like sexually open minded and anyone can be that

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

That about sums it up then for me - if you enjoy sex with A N Other with no strings, then I would say you are "swinging" xx

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod

over a year ago

Im glad things have moved on from the days of putting your keys in a bowl!

We now have more choice and easier access which enables us to find exactly what we're looking for be it a singles or a couples

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Totally agree with you honeypotcouple -

I would never do the keys in bowl thing as I am very choosy about who I will play with.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"That about sums it up then for me - if you enjoy sex with A N Other with no strings, then I would say you are "swinging" xx"

Not sure we'd agree... If your in a club and you pick up a date i.e AN other and end up having no strings sex.. thats not swinging surely?

Just as we'd probably say just cause your on a swinging site doesn't make you a swinger..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

nor would i, i don't have a car lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have to agree to differ. If having sex with someone in a club is not swinging then what would you call it? Do you have the opinion that you should get to know someone really well before playing to be called a swinger?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not at all... why has it got to have a label... when your out and on the pull your on the pull.. your not out swinging are you lol.. When your arranging to meet for sex.. thats different..

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod

over a year ago

O o O oo

We have never classed ourselves as swingers as we only have threesomes.

I always thought the same as most, to swing you have to have a partner to swop with.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

But I do both - go to a club and arrange to meet form the site - so does that make me a swinger or something else?

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod

over a year ago

My single friends that go out on the pull would never class themselves as swingers

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"But I do both - go to a club and arrange to meet form the site - so does that make me a swinger or something else?"

I think your thinking swinging clubs... what about all the folk who just go out to pull.. bars, cinemas, normal clubs and cope off?? Are they swingers then??

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod

over a year ago

Do we need to create another name for singles if they're not swingers? lol

Sometimes Id be a swinger and sometimes Id be something else then!

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

If their attitude towards swinging remains the same as when they were swinging as part of a couple - Does a swinger cease to be a swinger because they cease to be in a relationship? Or do they just cease to be able to swing?

I do not believe 1-2-1 sex is swinging - it's just casual sex... otherwise everyone out on the pull tonight in town is a swinger.

I believe the act of swinging is sex between 3 or more consenting adults where a pre-existing relationship exists between at least two of those involved... that does not necessarily mean man and wife.

Do I believe I am involved in swinging - yes... some of the time.

Do I believe I am a swinger - yes I guess so, but I am not precious about label.

Do I believe calling yourself a swinger makes any sexual act with someone else (who calls themselves a swinger) swinging - hell no.

Casual sex is a perfectly good term for casual sex - I see no reason to dress it up or try to differentiate it just because of the site on which it has been arranged.

Am I open minded enough about sex as a recreational activity to not really be bothered about whether my activities are swinging or not? lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Do we need to create another name for singles if they're not swingers? lol

Sometimes Id be a swinger and sometimes Id be something else then!

"

What about..... 'Swingles' and 'swinglers' Lol....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I like those names - quirky.

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester


" Maybe it’s time for this site to recognise this and make some changes to how we all conduct ourselves on here. The most often raised complaint is about unwanted or inappropriate emails and in the main these come from single folk.

Perhaps changing single folks access to the email system from what it currently is to receive and reply only, as this would stop the majority of the offenders in their tracks. It would in no way diminish the single folks chances of meeting but would put the selection process firmly in the hands of those couples looking for single folk to join them.

"

It would also mean a reasonable number of couples (who currently just post in their ad what they are looking for) will have to get back in to the habit of sending out pm's (and getting knock-backs) rather than just sitting back and waiting for the pm's to roll in.

Another interesting side to it would be... what if only one half of the couple wanted to meet someone? Would they be bending the rules somewhat using their couple's account to contact people for 1-2-1's?

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By *leasureDomeMan
over a year ago

all over the place


"That about sums it up then for me - if you enjoy sex with A N Other with no strings, then I would say you are "swinging" xx"

yeah i agree with that too ..i operate within a group of singles and we swing together ...sometimes as couples singles 3 or 4s but they are all singles enjoying hedonistic sex ,none of them are couples

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"That about sums it up then for me - if you enjoy sex with A N Other with no strings, then I would say you are "swinging" xx

yeah i agree with that too ..i operate within a group of singles and we swing together ...sometimes as couples singles 3 or 4s but they are all singles enjoying hedonistic sex ,none of them are couples

"

I'd agree if all were swingers... but what if and when you were just out and about.. you were in a normal club say and had no strings with someone not associated with swinging in any way or form.. are they a swinger just because you had sex?? You may still be.. but I doubt they are and it just reinforces the 'label' thing lol....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Call it what you may - we just bad lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Way to go sin4all!!

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod

over a year ago

O o O oo


"Call it what you may - we just bad lol"

And loving it

Surely meeting someone when you are out is NSA one night stands not swinging.

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod

over a year ago

Ive never liked the term swinger anyway purely because of the 70's keys in the bowl thing,it just conjures up images of flares,sideburns and dodgy magnum type moustaches lol

I prefer filthy minx myself :D

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"

I prefer filthy minx myself :D

"

We prefer two lol

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By *leasureDomeMan
over a year ago

all over the place


"Ive never liked the term swinger anyway purely because of the 70's keys in the bowl thing,it just conjures up images of flares,sideburns and dodgy magnum type moustaches lol

I prefer filthy minx myself :D

"

yeahhhhh wot you got against flares ,sideburns and the magnum thing then .,...huh .....

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod

over a year ago


"Ive never liked the term swinger anyway purely because of the 70's keys in the bowl thing,it just conjures up images of flares,sideburns and dodgy magnum type moustaches lol

I prefer filthy minx myself :D

yeahhhhh wot you got against flares ,sideburns and the magnum thing then .,...huh ....."

I have a huge family and all I remember as a child in the 70s was family weddings and all the uncles looking like that and having to kiss them all whenever I saw them YUK!!

Well you did ask lol

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By *ichNjudyCouple
over a year ago

stoke on trent

And if we may just ask the OP.....

We're a couple, we play with other couples therefore per se: we are Swingers.

Now then, Rich decides to have a solo meet with girl from another swinging couple while Judy is on a vanilla night out - are the two of us having the meet still Swingers? Or have we become something else for the night?

What if Judy comes back from the vanilla night out to find us still at it, and joins in? Are we swinging now?

Finally of course my fuck-buddy's partner comes to pick her up too, he doesn't join in but sits and watches the three of us till we finish.

This isn't fantasy, it's a true situation that we have experienced.

So were we swinging that night, or at what point did we start.

Please enlighten us it's too difficult to work it out ourselves lol.... but it was a hell of a lot of fun!!!

xxxxx

J&R

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

An alternative way to look at it is:

A trucker is someone who drives a truck/lorry/HGV and whilst he is driving his truck he is trucking. What if he parks up his truck and drives his car to the supermarket? Whilst it is obvious he is not trucking and could quite rightly be classed as a motorist on his drive to pick up the groceries, would he lose being a trucker as part of his identity? If he was asked to describe himself could he not still call himself a trucker?

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod

over a year ago

Once a trucker always a trucker even if for that moment in time you're not actually trucking

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By *hemadcoupleCouple
over a year ago

cardiff


"Once a trucker always a trucker even if for that moment in time you're not actually trucking

"

Ah but when he picks up a date rather than the groceries and starts to fuck 'er, then he is a fucker trucker, ha ha. Sorry.

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By *hemadcoupleCouple
over a year ago

cardiff

Actually I think that swinging describes the activity of the moment, which others have already alluded to, and does not describe all the activities that the persons involved are into.

A bit like the trucker, a couple are still swingers when indulging in sexual activities not strictly describable as swinging, (which is imho only possible by definition between couples),but which could involve them acting as singles after no strings sex with strangers or friends or whatever, or the seeking of extra single partners for threesomes etc. which strictly speaking is something other than swinging.

It is a complicated situation, but being pedantic, swinging is really between couples, and swinging couples often indulge in other activities.

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

Ok, my thoughts are, yes traditionally swinging is seen as a couples pastime. If it was a couples only site then yes it would be a swingers site still.

Now the difference between a single swinger and a dating site in my opinion is, a dating site is mainly for people looking for one to one relationship. Now there are some singles on here looking for that and they would be better of on a dating site.

In my opinion what makes a swinger a swinger is someone who is sexually open minded a wanting variety sex to enhence what they have. Now a single who enjoys sex with couples, bi experiences or any other experiences that are not associated with a monoganous relationship is a swinger (as long as they are not cheating).

I do think there could be such thing as a singles swinging site if they where all genuine swingers, but as many people often wonder if singles are genunine swingers. If you have a couples only swinging site there is no doubt that the couples are swingers as they are there to have sexual experiences outside there monoganous relationship.

Does any of that make sense lol

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By *leasureDomeMan
over a year ago

all over the place

no lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

If I sound patronising it is not my intention but there have been some fantastic answers and, praise the lord it has stayed civil.

If you look at my opening post I have made a couple of sweeping generalisations which I followed up with a serious of questions that were simply that, questions that I hoped would get folk to offer opinion. It seems most of us accept that this is a predominantly couples lifestyle, and despite my earlier assertions I do believe that anyone who enjoys this lifestyle is fully entitled to wear the “swingers t-shirt”, but I cannot help but loudly applaud TraceandRic’s analogy which sums up in a few brief paragraphs what took me ages to compose.

Rich and Judy,

I have no right or wrong answers to your question but in my opinion you guys were swinging from the start to finish. The fact that you are two couples who swing together or in similar scenarios as you describe makes it so. However if you take the FB out of the equation is that still swinging? I think it is because there is still a couple involved but that’s just my humble opinion but if you then take either Rich or Judy out of the equation what are we now left with?

Karen,

You say that for you a swinger is someone who is sexually open minded and wants to have variety sex to enhance what they already have……….. I work with young guys who operate on the understanding that every holes a goal and would f@ck the crack of dawn if they could get up early enough so does that make them swingers? I do agree that a single who enjoys a sexual encounter with a couple can be described as a swinger but a single who enjoys a bi experience is not swinging, he/she is simply enjoying NSA fun……………….then you lost me lol

PD,

Is what you describe swinging or is it just the same as the College Sex vid’s where it’s just another orgy? It’s another of those blurred edge things but if you guys normally play with, or as couples then swinging it is but you must see how that scenario can be misinterpreted.

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire


"If I sound patronising it is not my intention but there have been some fantastic answers and, praise the lord it has stayed civil.

If you look at my opening post I have made a couple of sweeping generalisations which I followed up with a serious of questions that were simply that, questions that I hoped would get folk to offer opinion. It seems most of us accept that this is a predominantly couples lifestyle, and despite my earlier assertions I do believe that anyone who enjoys this lifestyle is fully entitled to wear the “swingers t-shirt”, but I cannot help but loudly applaud TraceandRic’s analogy which sums up in a few brief paragraphs what took me ages to compose.

Rich and Judy,

I have no right or wrong answers to your question but in my opinion you guys were swinging from the start to finish. The fact that you are two couples who swing together or in similar scenarios as you describe makes it so. However if you take the FB out of the equation is that still swinging? I think it is because there is still a couple involved but that’s just my humble opinion but if you then take either Rich or Judy out of the equation what are we now left with?

Karen,

You say that for you a swinger is someone who is sexually open minded and wants to have variety sex to enhance what they already have……….. I work with young guys who operate on the understanding that every holes a goal and would f@ck the crack of dawn if they could get up early enough so does that make them swingers? I do agree that a single who enjoys a sexual encounter with a couple can be described as a swinger but a single who enjoys a bi experience is not swinging, he/she is simply enjoying NSA fun……………….then you lost me lol

PD,

Is what you describe swinging or is it just the same as the College Sex vid’s where it’s just another orgy? It’s another of those blurred edge things but if you guys normally play with, or as couples then swinging it is but you must see how that scenario can be misinterpreted.

"

yes twobonks we actually agree the guys who think every hole is a goal are not swingers, but the guys/women who enjoy couples, threesomes ect i would class as swingers.

That phrase "every hole is a goal" makes me so glad i brought my son up to respect women i would be mortified if i thought he used that term

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

I thought it would be interesting to see how many couples are looking to meet couples (seeking to swing) compared to how many couples are seeking singles to play with (seeking recreational sex) … but it seems the system max’s out at 600 results.

Couples seeking couples = 600

Couples seeking men = 600

Couples seeking women = 600

Couples seeking TV/TS = 600

So I refined the search to a 10 year age span and one geographical area… couples seeking men, couples seeking women and couples seeking couples all topped out at 600 again.

So I refined the search a few different ways by changing the entry in the ‘Interested in’ and the areas. Sometimes the results for couples seeking couples was highest – sometimes it wasn’t.

So not very conclusive other than many couples using swinging sites don’t just want to swing with other couples and generally want to enjoy recreational sex (by whatever name you wish to call it); and whilst couples may be the backbone of the swinging scene, singles are an intrinsic part of a lifestyle open to recreational sex.

May be we should all just focus on enjoying the sex (whatever our preferences) rather than worrying if it is or isn’t OK to label it something.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Is the desire to label yourself a swinger just a like wearing a club tie ?

There are certainly sections in the "scene" who love to wave the "I'm swingier,swingier than thou" placard.

Id say the need to label yourself is just a form of elitism.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Is the desire to label yourself a swinger just a like wearing a club tie ?

There are certainly sections in the "scene" who love to wave the "I'm swingier,swingier than thou" placard.

Id say the need to label yourself is just a form of elitism.

"

Are we touching on 'snobbery' again, lol.

My thinking is the term 'swinging' was brought in as an update of 'wife swapping' as times moved on, couples sometimes want just one more person involved, not always another couple, I don't believe one has to be a part of a couple to be considered a swinger, then again, I don't believe one has to be single to be classed as a chancer.

W

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Is the desire to label yourself a swinger just a like wearing a club tie ?

There are certainly sections in the "scene" who love to wave the "I'm swingier,swingier than thou" placard.

Id say the need to label yourself is just a form of elitism.

"

You are certainly right with that but, and this is a polite request and not meant to be provocative in any shape or form, how would you describe yourselves if not using the term swingers?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"

May be we should all just focus on enjoying the sex (whatever our preferences) rather than worrying if it is or isn’t OK to label it something.

"

Absolutely !!

From dammie.

A trucker that drives his car in the same stylee, and with the same attitude that he drives his truck.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Women are the only true swingers - the answers to this comment are all around us:

Females be they single, straight, bisexual or part of a couple can and do have as much fun as they wish, the same can't be said for 99% of males.

We as others have been contacted by couples that enjoy voyeurism. On every occasion it has been the male that doesn't, for whatever reason, take any physical part.

Do voyeuristic females exist ?

Cuckold couples - does this particular interest happen in reverse? I know, a contradiction in terms, but I hope that you get my point !

The dominant male submissive female relationship is obviously alive and kicking but how many practise this without the permission of the female ?

Of course there are couples out there where the male is forcing the female into swinging, but that's another post entirely and no matter how you may cut it - it is not swinging!!!

Gang bangs - listed as an interest by many and if you believe the popular opinion the vast majority of women fantasise about this activity.

What is the male equivalent and is he still alive ?

Female only socials are always very popular.

The very idea of a male only social is laughable !!

Males that play with the full knowledge and permission of the female are just simply dismissed, the same can't be said for the opposite ?

Would swinging survive without the female to female chat ?

How long do you think it would take a female to find a f/buddy? Very much longer than a man ? lol

Question:

The straight or bisexual female of the couple you have arranged to meet contacts you saying - sorry but Mr swinger can't make it tonight.

Would you cancel or would it be just fine - now reverse this situation lol

Just my silly thoughts on the subject !

Long live women cos ya so bad lmao

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod

over a year ago

Fab post and so true...one thing though can you repost it on the pussy posse pah!! thread

*wink* xx

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Sin,

Great post with a lot of sense in it and I certainly know who wears the trousers in the decision making process for us.

Whilst I fully agree that single women hold a lot of the high cards as do women in couples but would argue quite strongly that couples do things together with mutual consent, mutual respect and mutual understanding. Anything else would probably be referred as cheating I suspect.

Even in the extremes of gang bang and cuckold their is partner consent as with both activities it's the very act that leads to satisfaction for both.

So you could argue that whilst women set the pace it needs a couple to participate before swinging actually takes place.............just my humble thought

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"

how would you describe yourselves if not using the term swingers?"

"Ordinary people"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I wouldn't class singles as swingers. Swingers are swappers, can't swap with a single

Singles are looking for Fuck buddies or making friends with "friends with plus".

But then would I class couples who want to meet singles as swingers...maybe not, but Can't think of a name for them...

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"

how would you describe yourselves if not using the term swingers?

"Ordinary people"

"

And if describing yourselves to your non swinging friends ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"

how would you describe yourselves if not using the term swingers?

"Ordinary people"

And if describing yourselves to your non swinging friends ?"

We wouldn't. Honestly why would we?

We don't wear it like a badge its just a fun pastime

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"

how would you describe yourselves if not using the term swingers?

"Ordinary people"

And if describing yourselves to your non swinging friends ?

We wouldn't. Honestly why would we?

We don't wear it like a badge its just a fun pastime"

Yes I get that, 'We Swing' rather than 'We are Swingers', makes sense to me.

W

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"

Yes I get that, 'We Swing' rather than 'We are Swingers', makes sense to me.

W "

Exactly

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By *leasureDomeMan
over a year ago

all over the place


"

PD,

Is what you describe swinging or is it just the same as the College Sex vid’s where it’s just another orgy? It’s another of those blurred edge things but if you guys normally play with, or as couples then swinging it is but you must see how that scenario can be misinterpreted.

"

Well its only blurred if you live within the boxed structure and rules that you have applied .Within the group we have ..we are all consenting singles who swing in various combinations within the group.

We occasionally invite non gorup members to join us or combine to swing with others sometimes other groups even...it is not a college scenario nor a orgy type scenario.

Just hedonists who have chucked the conventional rules of society...it is not unique ..many people enjoy swinging this way.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If folk can debate in a sensible and rational manner this thread will run it’s course quite happily so please leave your handbags at the door

The popular misconception amongst single folk involved in the swinging world is that they believe that they themselves are swingers. I believe all they really are is an addition, sometimes welcome and sometimes not to an already complicated lifestyle.

If you were to ask any of your non swinging friends to define swinging they would all without doubt tell you it’s about couples having sex with other couples. They may well expand on that to include single folk, parties and clubs etc but the basic premise is that swinging is a couples hobby.

I know it’s only Wiki but check the link below and you will see that whilst you may consider it just another generalisation it does lend credence to my statement above

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Swinging

If you were to remove all the couples from this site and leave it occupied by single folk only is it still a swingers site? Or is it simply another dating site?

If the site was only full of like minded couples seeking sexual encounters with other likeminded couples then I think we would agree that it was a swingers site. The blurring round the edges comes with the inclusion of single folk and all the other sexual variety’s.

If a couple decide they want, for what ever reason to include a single person in their sexual activities is that swinging?

If a single women on here contacts and meets a single guy on here, or the other way around is that swinging? IMHO and I do stress IMHO it's not as it's no different from meeting on any number of the popular dating web sites. If a man and women meet in a pub/club etc and end up having NSA casual sex they would never consider themselves as swingers, or would they? Ask your best mate the next time he/she pulls on a Saturday night if they considered what they had just enjoyed as swinging.

Two Bi guys or girls meet on here is that swinging or just another date, see above

Is dogging swinging or is it simply voyeuristic sex?

Is the Cuckold scenario swinging or just another sexual persuasion?

A group of young single folk all have sex together, lots of Vid's out there on College sex, is that swinging or an orgy?

A bunch of older single folk of here get together for a party is that swinging or an orgy?

Is web cam sex swinging or just another variation on the voyeur theme?

Is a gang bang swinging or an extension of the cuckold/orgy/voyeur theme?

The list is endless however what is as clear as a clear thing is that if you take single folk out of the swinging world swinging continues, albeit not to everyone’s satisfaction but take the couples out then swinging simply ceases to exist.

Maybe it’s time for this site to recognise this and make some changes to how we all conduct ourselves on here. The most often raised complaint is about unwanted or inappropriate emails and in the main these come from single folk.

Perhaps changing single folks access to the email system from what it currently is to receive and reply only, as this would stop the majority of the offenders in their tracks. It would in no way diminish the single folks chances of meeting but would put the selection process firmly in the hands of those couples looking for single folk to join them.

This simple change would also remove the ability of those who quite obviously use the site as just another dating agency or to perpetuate their infidelity.

Just some humble, if not rather opinionated thoughts which I hope will spark some lively debate, just try and keep it polite ?

"

We have never heard a more ridiculous suggestion than you should not be able to contact people if you join this site as a single because you are not a swinger and singles can not swing. I am part of a couple and we swing as a couple at clubs and with friends. I have fantasies of affairs with single men which may partner is fully aware of and I have his blessing. I have an account on this site to fulfil my fantasies which is a single female seeking men. When I display my account it clearly states I have a partner and what I am looking for so I am deceiving no one. You have suggested I should not be allowed the same access to the site because you think it is not swinging even though it is an option the site has given me to select as what I am looking for. I do not see you suggesting couples should only be able to send mail to couples because anything else is not swinging.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"

Yes I get that, 'We Swing' rather than 'We are Swingers', makes sense to me.

W

Exactly "

I suspect that when you both look at this later today you will, like I am, chuckle away to yourselves at the very notion that you can swing but not be a swinger lol

It's rather like someone who plays golf saying they are not a golfer, or a stamp collector saying I am not a philatelist, or someone who goes to watch his footy team every Saturday saying I am not a football supporter.

It's a charming thought but, like every kite I have ever owned I don't think it's ever going to fly

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Sensual Mandy,

You are quite right that it was a suggestion but was it necessarily ridiculous?

If you trawl through the various forums you will find loads of threads where the biggest bug bear from many folk is the amount of unsolicited email they get from, in the main, single guys. It's everything from "nice tit's" and "would love to fuck you" through to the idiots who live in Scotland and contact folk on the south coast asking "fancy meeting up".

My suggestion would stop that in it's tracks and allow couples to contact single folk of their choosing as opposed to being pestered.

However I never said it was the gold plated GTI solution and only threw it open the floor. If I genuinely thought it was the way ahead I would have raised it with the site owners on the site feedback forum but I haven't and I wont be in the future either.

I know it did not take into account your situation and that is simply a short coming on my thought processing power however if you look at what the suggestion was trying to address is it still ridiculous or is it just slightly ill conceived

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By *adchickCouple
over a year ago

Cyprus

Single men can swing.

Providing they can get an erection in front of another male.

Otherwise, in my opinion, it's just casual sex.

To me, swinging is having fun, sexual times, with 3 or more people.

1-2-1 sex is just that, 1-2-1 sex. Casual, one night stands etc.

Single men and single women on a swinging site, who are only looking for 1-2-1 sex should actually, in MY opinion, be on a sex site, NOT on a swingers site.

**maddie sits down and waits for the backlash**

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"

Yes I get that, 'We Swing' rather than 'We are Swingers', makes sense to me.

W

Exactly

I suspect that when you both look at this later today you will, like I am, chuckle away to yourselves at the very notion that you can swing but not be a swinger lol

It's rather like someone who plays golf saying they are not a golfer, or a stamp collector saying I am not a philatelist, or someone who goes to watch his footy team every Saturday saying I am not a football supporter.

It's a charming thought but, like every kite I have ever owned I don't think it's ever going to fly "

You don't get it at all do you.

YOU need to call yourself something.

We don't.

The "hobbies" you describe are clear cut and easy to define.

Now please define the term "swingers" and lets see if you can come up with a definition everyone agrees with.

That I doubt and so why bother trying to label something that has no strict definition.

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester


"Single men can swing.

Providing they can get an erection in front of another male.

Otherwise, in my opinion, it's just casual sex.

To me, swinging is having fun, sexual times, with 3 or more people.

1-2-1 sex is just that, 1-2-1 sex. Casual, one night stands etc.

Single men and single women on a swinging site, who are only looking for 1-2-1 sex should actually, in MY opinion, be on a sex site, NOT on a swingers site.

**maddie sits down and waits for the backlash**

"

Pretty much my thoughts on the matter. Though I have to admit to sometimes wondering why some people feel the need to try and differentiate the 1-2-1 sex they have from the 1-2-1 sex other people have by labelling it swinging. May be a few have underlying hang-ups about enjoying sex… who knows.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"

Yes I get that, 'We Swing' rather than 'We are Swingers', makes sense to me.

W

Exactly

I suspect that when you both look at this later today you will, like I am, chuckle away to yourselves at the very notion that you can swing but not be a swinger lol

It's rather like someone who plays golf saying they are not a golfer, or a stamp collector saying I am not a philatelist, or someone who goes to watch his footy team every Saturday saying I am not a football supporter.

It's a charming thought but, like every kite I have ever owned I don't think it's ever going to fly

You don't get it at all do you.

YOU need to call yourself something.

We don't.

The "hobbies" you describe are clear cut and easy to define.

Now please define the term "swingers" and lets see if you can come up with a definition everyone agrees with.

That I doubt and so why bother trying to label something that has no strict definition.

"

Swingers...........ok lets see...

Swingers are people who take part in swinging, or are people who freely admit they swing.

Yes, I think that's, it swingers is the collective term for people who swing..........unless I am missing something blindingly obvious

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"

.....unless I am missing something blindingly obvious "

As usual yes.

What is swinging ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"

Yes I get that, 'We Swing' rather than 'We are Swingers', makes sense to me.

W

Exactly

I suspect that when you both look at this later today you will, like I am, chuckle away to yourselves at the very notion that you can swing but not be a swinger lol

It's rather like someone who plays golf saying they are not a golfer, or a stamp collector saying I am not a philatelist, or someone who goes to watch his footy team every Saturday saying I am not a football supporter.

It's a charming thought but, like every kite I have ever owned I don't think it's ever going to fly

You don't get it at all do you.

YOU need to call yourself something.

We don't.

The "hobbies" you describe are clear cut and easy to define.

Now please define the term "swingers" and lets see if you can come up with a definition everyone agrees with.

That I doubt and so why bother trying to label something that has no strict definition.

I A are people who take part in swinging, or are people who freely admit they swing.

Yes, I think that's, it swingers is the collective term for people who swing..........unless I am missing something blindingly obvious "

Isnt it someone who seeks hedonistic pleasure that although comes naturally falls outside outside the normal moral boundaries that society imposes.

The examples you chose re golf and stamps really were not that effective ,someone can play golf just to make up the numbers or happen to be at a business meeting which has gravitated to a game of golf because of the location .

Also someone can acquire a set of stamps for other reasons than the stamps themselves ..eg ..someone who want a specific first day cover which has been signed by a group of people

Once again things are never clear cut in human sexuality ..and why do we feel the need to package it with definitions or to seek to exclude ?

Just let i5t be a natural act we are designed to do

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"

.....unless I am missing something blindingly obvious

As usual yes.

What is swinging ?

"

Apologies but you did ask for my definition of swingers which my previous post sort of gave, now for my definition of swinging.

To me swinging is when couples or singles or a combination of both join together for consensual and mutual sexual satisfaction in a whole variety of sexual formats.

To summarise swinging, as described above is something swingers do and swingers are people who swing, did I miss anything

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"

.....unless I am missing something blindingly obvious

As usual yes.

What is swinging ?

Apologies but you did ask for my definition of swingers which my previous post sort of gave, now for my definition of swinging.

To me swinging is when couples or singles or a combination of both join together for consensual and mutual sexual satisfaction in a whole variety of sexual formats.

To summarise swinging, as described above is something swingers do and swingers are people who swing, did I miss anything

"

In your opinion.

Although I do find the part where you have included singles having sex "together for consensual and mutual sexual satisfaction" amusing since it makes the point of this thread redundant if there is no distinction as to the "status" for want of a better word of the single who is on this site looking for sex why start the thread? which in itself was really just a "singles are there for the amusement of couples" diatribe.

YOU have a need to label yourself.

I don't.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Why then,if there are obviously couples on here who don't class themselves as swingers,did they join a swingers site.A site that is labeled as such and therefore makes them "guilty" by association.

When they were trawling the web looking for a site to join they must have seen the magic word "swinger" and thought "thats us,that'll do nicely".

The very fact that they've joined this or any other site with the prefix "swinging" means they must see themselves as swingers.If not why join?

Or are we being too simplistic?

Trace & Ric

XXXX

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

IF I was going to use a label I'd prefer Hedonist.

It describes the lifestyle I aspire to much better.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Does it really matter what labels people put onto others? I’m a man…not a swinger or any other tag you want to label me with….I’m a man. If we take away these labels that we use just for a minute what do we have left…at it’s base level nothing more than casual sex. I honestly can’t see what difference it makes whether your a couple or a single because at the end of the day were all looking for the same thing which is sex (often with complete strangers) and hopefully some level of retainable friendship, though often you see someone once only and never meet again.

1-2-1 sex, group sex, 3sums, 4sums, tied to a cross and flogged…what the hell does it matter? If I’m not mistaken a lot of couples look for single people, single people look for couples, couples look for couples and singles look for singles and everyone has the right to choose. If the overwhelming consensus among couples on this site that single people should not members of fabswingers because their preferences are to meet 1-2-1 and not couples (which I have read within this thread) then lobby the powers that be and get things changed. Hey, if being single means singletons are not particularly welcome then I for one don’t want to step on anyone’s toes and will find somewhere else to go, but surely those people who seem to have issues with singles should change their profiles to say couples only. And after reading some couples profiles I admit to being confused as to why any single person would want to meet as the profiles are not exactly friendly or welcoming. I for one don’t go in for the whole meeting up just to go through the motions without any kind of intimacy, I want to meet females for 1-2-1 or for FFM and I don’t want to meet MF couples…if that means I’m not a swinger then so be it…it’s a tag I can well do without.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"IF I was going to use a label I'd prefer Hedonist.

It describes the lifestyle I aspire to much better.

"

IF we were going to choose a label then we'd probably prefer Pleasure Seekers or Libertines.

However as such an option doesn't exist in the eyes of the Vanilla world it looks like we're stuck with Swingers.

Not that it bothers us though.

Trace & Ric

XXXX

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"IF I was going to use a label I'd prefer Hedonist.

It describes the lifestyle I aspire to much better.

"

Just a polite enquiry but what do hedonists that makes them different to swingers?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"IF I was going to use a label I'd prefer Hedonist.

It describes the lifestyle I aspire to much better.

Just a polite enquiry but what do hedonists that makes them different to swingers?"

Apologies but it should have have read

Just a polite enquiry but what do hedonists do that makes them different to swingers

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"IF I was going to use a label I'd prefer Hedonist.

It describes the lifestyle I aspire to much better.

"

wow like you xx

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By *leasureDomeMan
over a year ago

all over the place


"IF I was going to use a label I'd prefer Hedonist.

It describes the lifestyle I aspire to much better.

Just a polite enquiry but what do hedonists that makes them different to swingers?

Apologies but it should have have read

Just a polite enquiry but what do hedonists do that makes them different to swingers"

well its not what is done differently its more about the pursuit of pleasure and how it is perceived against less pleasurable things in life .

As a doctrine it was created in 435 bc by the greek philosopher whose belief was that you could quantify human values into pleasure and pain both being at opposite ends of the spectrum.

Pain to be avoided and pleasure pursued at all cost ...however you must temper that persuit with the phrase.

"I possess, I am not possessed" which i believe is its own inbuilt substantive moral code.

It does require restraint because hedonism in the 20th century became polluted for want of a better word by mixing it with utilitarianism .in that everything is ok if the end result is edged towards pleasure ,,when discussing pleasure it doesnt not only mean sexual pleasure reduction of lifes pains is a "pleasure" therefore is you get pleasure from say completing a credit agreement that is hedonistic ny nature as you are reducing pain and therefore increasing pleasure .

It is a probably a philosophy swingers and non swingers adopt by way of ...trying to get by or taking the least line of resistance in life in order to reduce the pain factors and increase pleasures.

I am going to shut up now because this mail in itself is a pain and i could go on for hours ...but to be honest i recommend we dont ....being a hedonist

The basic philosophy has been

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By *lex_NottsCouple
over a year ago

Nottingham

Another label.....I just don't care what people call themselves.

Dave_Notts

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"

.....unless I am missing something blindingly obvious

As usual yes.

What is swinging ?

Apologies but you did ask for my definition of swingers which my previous post sort of gave, now for my definition of swinging.

To me swinging is when couples or singles or a combination of both join together for consensual and mutual sexual satisfaction in a whole variety of sexual formats.

To summarise swinging, as described above is something swingers do and swingers are people who swing, did I miss anything

"

before you said swinging ceases if couples were out of here and now you think singles are swingers makes it more ridiculous!!!!!!!!!! and thats clear as a clear thing.

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By *leasureDomeMan
over a year ago

all over the place


"Another label.....I just don't care what people call themselves.

Dave_Notts"

well its not what the original thread was about .,...but if you do not like labels why put you looking for a couple why not open it up to people ?

mr x

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"

.....unless I am missing something blindingly obvious

As usual yes.

What is swinging ?

Apologies but you did ask for my definition of swingers which my previous post sort of gave, now for my definition of swinging.

To me swinging is when couples or singles or a combination of both join together for consensual and mutual sexual satisfaction in a whole variety of sexual formats.

To summarise swinging, as described above is something swingers do and swingers are people who swing, did I miss anything

before you said swinging ceases if couples were out of here and now you think singles are swingers makes it more ridiculous!!!!!!!!!! and thats clear as a clear thing.

"

Oh deary me Mandy,

If you had taken the time to read through the thread you would have noticed that despite my intial assertions with regards to singles the opinion of others had changed my mind

"It seems most of us accept that this is a predominantly couples lifestyle, and despite my earlier assertions I do believe that anyone who enjoys this lifestyle is fully entitled to wear the “swingers t-shirt”,

or

"It’s another of those blurred edge things but if you guys normally play with, or as couples then swinging it is but you must see how that scenario can be misinterpreted."

Do keep up

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By *lex_NottsCouple
over a year ago

Nottingham


"Another label.....I just don't care what people call themselves.

Dave_Notts

well its not what the original thread was about .,...but if you do not like labels why put you looking for a couple why not open it up to people ?

mr x"

I would say that if if I put up people and a couple of gay men wanted to play they would be pretty peed off since I am straight. The other half would have a field day watching but it wouldn't float my boat. So I would say one is a label i.e what are you? swinger or not, and the other is a preference and not a label

Dave_Nott

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Another label.....I just don't care what people call themselves.

Dave_Notts

well its not what the original thread was about .,...but if you do not like labels why put you looking for a couple why not open it up to people ?

mr x

I would say that if if I put up people and a couple of gay men wanted to play they would be pretty peed off since I am straight. The other half would have a field day watching but it wouldn't float my boat. So I would say one is a label i.e what are you? swinger or not, and the other is a preference and not a label

Dave_Nott"

I am even more confused now but still giggling away to myself at the ludicrous idea that being straight is a preference?

If I go to a restaurant my preference is always for a nice juicy steak but I will also enjoy chicken, lamb and fish if I cant find what I like on the menu.

A straight guy does not simply prefer women but will also accept chowing down on the old trouser snake as an alternative, it's women or nothing

Surely you are either straight, bi or gay................I prefer to be straight......lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i label myself as a pregnant weirdo

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"i label myself as a pregnant weirdo"

Me too!... and my wife! hehehe

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By *lex_NottsCouple
over a year ago

Nottingham


"Another label.....I just don't care what people call themselves.

Dave_Notts

well its not what the original thread was about .,...but if you do not like labels why put you looking for a couple why not open it up to people ?

mr x

I would say that if if I put up people and a couple of gay men wanted to play they would be pretty peed off since I am straight. The other half would have a field day watching but it wouldn't float my boat. So I would say one is a label i.e what are you? swinger or not, and the other is a preference and not a label

Dave_Nott

I am even more confused now but still giggling away to myself at the ludicrous idea that being straight is a preference?

If I go to a restaurant my preference is always for a nice juicy steak but I will also enjoy chicken, lamb and fish if I cant find what I like on the menu.

A straight guy does not simply prefer women but will also accept chowing down on the old trouser snake as an alternative, it's women or nothing

Surely you are either straight, bi or gay................I prefer to be straight......lol

"

Come to think of it.....perhaps straight is a preference and label. Not had to think of it like that.

It is still my preference to be straight, as I do not prefer to be gay or bi, so confused how it could be a ludricous idea.

Dave_Notts

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By *leasureDomeMan
over a year ago

all over the place


"Another label.....I just don't care what people call themselves.

Dave_Notts

well its not what the original thread was about .,...but if you do not like labels why put you looking for a couple why not open it up to people ?

mr x

I would say that if if I put up people and a couple of gay men wanted to play they would be pretty peed off since I am straight. The other half would have a field day watching but it wouldn't float my boat. So I would say one is a label i.e what are you? swinger or not, and the other is a preference and not a label

Dave_Nott

I am even more confused now but still giggling away to myself at the ludicrous idea that being straight is a preference?

If I go to a restaurant my preference is always for a nice juicy steak but I will also enjoy chicken, lamb and fish if I cant find what I like on the menu.

A straight guy does not simply prefer women but will also accept chowing down on the old trouser snake as an alternative, it's women or nothing

Surely you are either straight, bi or gay................I prefer to be straight......lol

Come to think of it.....perhaps straight is a preference and label. Not had to think of it like that.

It is still my preference to be straight, as I do not prefer to be gay or bi, so confused how it could be a ludricous idea.

Dave_Notts"

So labels are important then... lol even tho i agree with you we would all prefer them not to be needed,they sometimes have to in order to communicate what you are ...or what you seek

I mean for example you have put down your seeking a (couple mf) not just a man or a woman who happen to be present ..i would presume your seeking people in your situation an established couple ..not just a man or a woman who arrange to turn up at the same place same time ?

so couplemf is labelled and we all know what it means

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Are you suggesting that tomorrow you may on a whim decide to be bisexual ?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Are you suggesting that tomorrow you may on a whim decide to be bisexual ?

"

Sin,

I did sort of wonder that as well, and also considered whether that as being straight was a stated preference maybe the bi/gay thing had previously been tried hence the preference for remaining straight.............

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My doctor assured me that being a little bit dead was no different from missus sin being a little bit pregnant! - can you be a little bit bisexual or, as with heterosexuals, have limits ?

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By *lex_NottsCouple
over a year ago

Nottingham


"

So labels are important then... lol even tho i agree with you we would all prefer them not to be needed,they sometimes have to in order to communicate what you are ...or what you seek

I mean for example you have put down your seeking a (couple mf) not just a man or a woman who happen to be present ..i would presume your seeking people in your situation an established couple ..not just a man or a woman who arrange to turn up at the same place same time ?

so couplemf is labelled and we all know what it means "

Yep, some labels e.g. straight, married, woman are important to describe somebody.........but I ain't hung up on the swinger label and who should be or not be a swinger.

My profile is not a very accurate profile as it was changed to put on the bare minimum. I don't feel we need to "label" ourselves too much. In fact, thanks for pointing it out. I will remove more bits off it now :o)

Dave_Notts

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By *lex_NottsCouple
over a year ago

Nottingham


"Are you suggesting that tomorrow you may on a whim decide to be bisexual ?

"

I consider myself straight. I have never dabbled in bi-sexuality or being gay. But I do not know what tommorrow may bring. I never say never to life, as things always change.

Dave_Notts

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Are you suggesting that tomorrow you may on a whim decide to be bisexual ?

I consider myself straight. I have never dabbled in bi-sexuality or being gay. But I do not know what tommorrow may bring. I never say never to life, as things always change.

Dave_Notts"

CLUNK.............anyone else hear reverse gear being selected........

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"

Oh deary me Mandy,

If you had taken the time to read through the thread you would have noticed that despite my intial assertions with regards to singles the opinion of others had changed my mind

"It seems most of us accept that this is a predominantly couples lifestyle, and despite my earlier assertions I do believe that anyone who enjoys this lifestyle is fully entitled to wear the “swingers t-shirt”,

or

"It’s another of those blurred edge things but if you guys normally play with, or as couples then swinging it is but you must see how that scenario can be misinterpreted."

Do keep up "

Quit trying to be patronising its not big and its not clever. I did keep up and said your suggestion was ridiculous and I know thats after you had CLUNK selected reverse gear. After changing your mind that singles and couples can be swingers, you still ask is it so ridiculous singles should not be allowed to contact other people on here. I am pointing at another reason it is a ridiculous suggestion. You should try keeping up at least with your own opinion.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"

Oh deary me Mandy,

If you had taken the time to read through the thread you would have noticed that despite my initial assertions with regards to singles the opinion of others had changed my mind

"It seems most of us accept that this is a predominantly couples lifestyle, and despite my earlier assertions I do believe that anyone who enjoys this lifestyle is fully entitled to wear the “swingers t-shirt”,

or

"It’s another of those blurred edge things but if you guys normally play with, or as couples then swinging it is but you must see how that scenario can be misinterpreted."

Do keep up

Quit trying to be patronising its not big and its not clever. I did keep up and said your suggestion was ridiculous and I know thats after you had CLUNK selected reverse gear. After changing your mind that singles and couples can be swingers, you still ask is it so ridiculous singles should not be allowed to contact other people on here. I am pointing at another reason it is a ridiculous suggestion. You should try keeping up at least with your own opinion."

Mandy,

I posted this 3 days ago

"Sensual Mandy,

You are quite right that it was a suggestion but was it necessarily ridiculous?

If you trawl through the various forums you will find loads of threads where the biggest bug bear from many folk is the amount of unsolicited email they get from, in the main, single guys. It's everything from "nice tit's" and "would love to fuck you" through to the idiots who live in Scotland and contact folk on the south coast asking "fancy meeting up".

My suggestion would stop that in it's tracks and allow couples to contact single folk of their choosing as opposed to being pestered.

However I never said it was the gold plated GTI solution and only threw it open the floor. If I genuinely thought it was the way ahead I would have raised it with the site owners on the site feedback forum but I haven't and I wont be in the future either.

I know it did not take into account your situation and that is simply a short coming on my thought processing power however if you look at what the suggestion was trying to address is it still ridiculous or is it just slightly ill conceived "

I changed my mind about single folk because I have I have an open mind and am willing to accept and understand a well reasoned argument. Pleasuredome and a few other sensible folk cleared up some very obvious perception errors I had, and because of the logical and sensible message they conveyed, it would have been pretty bloody churlish of me not to agree.

Now if you go back and look at your accusation of me being patronising, then re read my post from 3 days ago where I apologise to you for not appreciating your situation because of a lack of thought processing power, so when I say Keep Up is it really me being patronising or simply stating the bleedin obvious

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I read that and replied to that and then you started being patronising with all your oh deary me and keep up comments. Your real agenda is a bit clearer now so I won’t be biting no matter how hard you try and side step. I’ll continue reading the sensible peoples stuff.

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By *leasureDomeMan
over a year ago

all over the place


"I read that and replied to that and then you started being patronising with all your oh deary me and keep up comments. Your real agenda is a bit clearer now so I won’t be biting no matter how hard you try and side step. I’ll continue reading the sensible peoples stuff."

well it does say you want stimulating conversation ......ok ok ...dont pick on me ....pmsl

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By *lex_NottsCouple
over a year ago

Nottingham


"Are you suggesting that tomorrow you may on a whim decide to be bisexual ?

I consider myself straight. I have never dabbled in bi-sexuality or being gay. But I do not know what tommorrow may bring. I never say never to life, as things always change.

Dave_Notts

CLUNK.............anyone else hear reverse gear being selected........ "

PMSL @ twobonk. Yep @ and not with

Unless people are fortune tellers how do they know what tommorrow brings. People can say what their preference is now but what does the future hold

Dave_Notts

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Are you suggesting that tomorrow you may on a whim decide to be bisexual ?

I consider myself straight. I have never dabbled in bi-sexuality or being gay. But I do not know what tommorrow may bring. I never say never to life, as things always change.

Dave_Notts

CLUNK.............anyone else hear reverse gear being selected........

PMSL @ twobonk. Yep @ and not with

Unless people are fortune tellers how do they know what tommorrow brings. People can say what their preference is now but what does the future hold

Dave_Notts"

Dave,

My hat is totally doffed.

Having not tried the gay/bi thing in the past you confirm that it is a serious real time option for you in the coming years, that is true open mindedness and you have my utmost respect for it

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By *lex_NottsCouple
over a year ago

Nottingham


"Are you suggesting that tomorrow you may on a whim decide to be bisexual ?

I consider myself straight. I have never dabbled in bi-sexuality or being gay. But I do not know what tommorrow may bring. I never say never to life, as things always change.

Dave_Notts

CLUNK.............anyone else hear reverse gear being selected........

PMSL @ twobonk. Yep @ and not with

Unless people are fortune tellers how do they know what tommorrow brings. People can say what their preference is now but what does the future hold

Dave_Notts

Dave,

My hat is totally doffed.

Having not tried the gay/bi thing in the past you confirm that it is a serious real time option for you in the coming years, that is true open mindedness and you have my utmost respect for it "

Thank you twobonk

I have met some people during our time in the scene. Some of these have become bi very late in life. Was there an inkling before? I don't know.

I have many friends in the scene that people label gay, bi, TVs, hetro, etc. To me it is all a label. What do I call them? Usually Jim, Fred, Marie, Janet, etc. To me the labels are just a sexual preference of the people...........the important thing to me is the individuals. If we met you at a social twobonk......we would know you as twobonk and not as swingers.

Now if any of you can make sense of that rambling then please PM me what I meant.....well it made sense in my head when I was writing it lol

Dave_Notts

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

But if it was a swingers social would we not be known as twobonk the swingers.......good natured joshing and not to be taken seriously

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod

over a year ago

How would that be? everyone at the social would be swingers

hello im honeypot the swinger and thats Mr pot the swinger and over there is 2bonk who funnily enough is also a swinger.... etc lol

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By *leasureDomeMan
over a year ago

all over the place


"How would that be? everyone at the social would be swingers

hello im honeypot the swinger and thats Mr pot the swinger and over there is 2bonk who funnily enough is also a swinger.... etc lol"

what if your a barman who works at the place where its held ...he is not a swinger...just to be pedantic

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"How would that be? everyone at the social would be swingers

hello im honeypot the swinger and thats Mr pot the swinger and over there is 2bonk who funnily enough is also a swinger.... etc lol

what if your a barman who works at the place where its held ...he is not a swinger...just to be pedantic "

To be even more pedantic, and trust me I am dead good at it, swingers come from all walks of life so how do you actually know the bar person is not a swinger...............

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By *leasureDomeMan
over a year ago

all over the place


"How would that be? everyone at the social would be swingers

hello im honeypot the swinger and thats Mr pot the swinger and over there is 2bonk who funnily enough is also a swinger.... etc lol

what if your a barman who works at the place where its held ...he is not a swinger...just to be pedantic

To be even more pedantic, and trust me I am dead good at it, swingers come from all walks of life so how do you actually know the bar person is not a swinger............... "

ahh true ....i accept he could be ...but as swingers represent inly 5% of the population at least one bar person must not be a swinger so ...the original statement that everyone there is a swinger is incorrect ...statistically anyway .....pmsl ...

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"How would that be? everyone at the social would be swingers

hello im honeypot the swinger and thats Mr pot the swinger and over there is 2bonk who funnily enough is also a swinger.... etc lol

what if your a barman who works at the place where its held ...he is not a swinger...just to be pedantic

To be even more pedantic, and trust me I am dead good at it, swingers come from all walks of life so how do you actually know the bar person is not a swinger...............

ahh true ....i accept he could be ...but as swingers represent inly 5% of the population at least one bar person must not be a swinger so ...the original statement that everyone there is a swinger is incorrect ...statistically anyway .....pmsl ..."

74% of all statistics are made up

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod

over a year ago

Ahhh talk about splitting hairs you 2! lol

I would'nt imagine that the barman was a swinger but if he was....Thats Fred the barman hes also a swinger! pmsl

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By *adchickCouple
over a year ago

Cyprus

And for once, it's not me creating the backlash.

The pedantic one is alays pedantic, therefore, ensuring continuity on these forums.

Me, I'm always a stroppy cow, therefore, ensuring continuity on these forums.

Who cars to be blatantly honest? We all have our own thoughts on who is and who isn't definable as a swinger. It's what makes things so interesting.

We are a couple, we prefer single males to join us over couples but thats cus me and Mr Madchick are picky buggers and very rarely do we find a couple where we both like both of them.

Does that make us anyless of value to the swinging community?

When I was a single swinger, I used to do gangbangs, mmf, mmmf, orgies, parties etc and the odd couple. Did that make me a swinger or a slut?

Couples are seen as those that started the swinging community, so No, without couples there would be no swinging...... probably!

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By *leasureDomeMan
over a year ago

all over the place


"How would that be? everyone at the social would be swingers

hello im honeypot the swinger and thats Mr pot the swinger and over there is 2bonk who funnily enough is also a swinger.... etc lol

what if your a barman who works at the place where its held ...he is not a swinger...just to be pedantic

To be even more pedantic, and trust me I am dead good at it, swingers come from all walks of life so how do you actually know the bar person is not a swinger...............

ahh true ....i accept he could be ...but as swingers represent inly 5% of the population at least one bar person must not be a swinger so ...the original statement that everyone there is a swinger is incorrect ...statistically anyway .....pmsl ...

74% of all statistics are made up "

yeah but but5 but ....that means 26% are true so ...that means that its still probable a non swing barperson is present ......your move

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By *leasureDomeMan
over a year ago

all over the place


"

Me, I'm always a stroppy cow, therefore, ensuring continuity on these forums.

Who cars to be blatantly honest? We all have our own thoughts on who is and who isn't definable as a swinger. It's what makes things so interesting.

!"

sorry i missed that ...what have cars got to do with it ....

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By *adchickCouple
over a year ago

Cyprus


"

Me, I'm always a stroppy cow, therefore, ensuring continuity on these forums.

Who cars to be blatantly honest? We all have our own thoughts on who is and who isn't definable as a swinger. It's what makes things so interesting.

!

sorry i missed that ...what have cars got to do with it ...."

knickers

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"How would that be? everyone at the social would be swingers

hello im honeypot the swinger and thats Mr pot the swinger and over there is 2bonk who funnily enough is also a swinger.... etc lol

what if your a barman who works at the place where its held ...he is not a swinger...just to be pedantic

To be even more pedantic, and trust me I am dead good at it, swingers come from all walks of life so how do you actually know the bar person is not a swinger...............

ahh true ....i accept he could be ...but as swingers represent inly 5% of the population at least one bar person must not be a swinger so ...the original statement that everyone there is a swinger is incorrect ...statistically anyway .....pmsl ...

74% of all statistics are made up

yeah but but5 but ....that means 26% are true so ...that means that its still probable a non swing barperson is present ......your move"

Unless of course my comments fall into the 26% bracket

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