FabSwingers.com forum: How to write a terrible profile.

By *wesomeLola OP Couple
over a year ago

Peterborough and Buckinghamshire

What do you think? Let me start off with a few.

1. Profile with almost no text.

2. Profile with no pics.

3. Couples profile with no man pics.

4. Dick pics and nothing else.

5. Long lists of things you don't want.

6. Telling me you probably won't reply to messages.

7. A disclaimer about Sydney University or Facebook.

What else?

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By *offee and Cream 2Couple (MM)
over a year ago

Loughborough

Cannot accommodate

Cannot travel

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By *ankie303Woman
over a year ago

Weirdsville South Coast Dorset

"I don't bite unless you want me to"

"Show me the ropes"

"Fill in later"

"Been here before and met loads of incredible people so know how it works" yet a year later no veri at all

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By *ornLordMan
over a year ago

Wiltshire and London

"Cannot accommodate

Cannot travel"

That’s pretty normal now, no?

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By *ankie303Woman
over a year ago

Weirdsville South Coast Dorset

"Just ask me anything"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

can lick for hours

can guarantee you to cum

i promise you a great time

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

oh and lets not forget...

i want regular (lol)

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By *wesomeLola OP Couple
over a year ago

Peterborough and Buckinghamshire

I suppose by asking this question I'm laying ourselves wide open to criticism of our own profile. We do have a _short_ list of dislikes, a spoof disclaimer, and we do want regular partners. Oops!

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By *neoclockgunMan
over a year ago

London

Surely just one dick pic, hanging out of grey y-fronts, with a toilet bowl in the background?

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By *partharmonyCouple
over a year ago

Ruislip

No avatar.

A list of wants with no mention of why somebody might enjoy providing for them, as if they are a charity.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I suppose by asking this question I'm laying ourselves wide open to criticism of our own profile. We do have a _short_ list of dislikes, a spoof disclaimer, and we do want regular partners. Oops!"

i meant it as guys saying i want regular but not meaning what they say ..

guess its meant for another list and not this one

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By *litterbabeWoman
over a year ago

hiding from cock pics.

a selection of pictures of them going bareback and others also showing lots of random people who probably haven't consented to being featured on their profile.

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By *ribsaMan
over a year ago

A box at end of your bed

Do we really need help to write a bad profile, think a lot of us do it with out an problem or thought.

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By *uckslut and MCouple
over a year ago

Poole

Looking for a couple, girls can play together. Their male can play with other female, but my man can't play with his female - only watch.

If they want a unicorn, just say! Not try to dodge finding a single female, by munipulating a couple.

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By *ntrepid ExplorersCouple
over a year ago

Birmingham

"I suppose by asking this question I'm laying ourselves wide open to criticism of our own profile. We do have a _short_ list of dislikes, a spoof disclaimer, and we do want regular partners. Oops!"

Your disclaimer is rubbish. As a UK citizen on a UK website run by a private company you also need to include references to an non-existent American privacy law, and state that the company actually a multi trillion dollar operation listed on the NASDAQ.

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By *ntrepid ExplorersCouple
over a year ago

Birmingham

And of course

NO MEN!!!

(ignore the message settings that enforce this, just keep shouting about it)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Do we really need help to write a bad profile, think a lot of us do it with out an problem or thought.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sorry cant read so wont read peoples profiles before responding.

I smell nice? (Why on earth wouldn’t you?)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sorry cant read so wont read peoples profiles before responding.

I smell nice? (Why on earth wouldn’t you?)

I'm soooo adding that!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

4 words...

"Will fill in later"

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By *moothshaftMan
over a year ago

Coventry

"Don't want to fuck my way around the whole site"

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By *osebud6688Woman
over a year ago

Northampton

"a selection of pictures of them going bareback and others also showing lots of random people who probably haven't consented to being featured on their profile."

Exactly this!!! I see this so often on both counts.

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By *nked_kittenWoman
over a year ago

Ankh Morpork

I’m discreet. I just read that as cheating

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By *oldyoudown41Man
over a year ago

caledonian

Yes the list of requirements,

Colour.

Size, girth, length , build

Hair ,Facial , trimmed downstairs .

Age cut off , I’m just over 40 .. oops too bad

Distance , we are practically neighbours but over 20 miles away is too far .

I could go on

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By *ntrepid ExplorersCouple
over a year ago

Birmingham

"I’m discreet. I just read that as cheating"

I usually do, seen some say that single men only must be "discreet", No taxis?! I guess it might look odder to the neighbours a string of single men rather than couples?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Do we really need help to write a bad profile, think a lot of us do it with out an problem or thought.

It's irony... To make people think.

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By *isstinseltoesWoman
over a year ago

Calderdale innit

Male profile full of more women than him

Ask me...

Been here before

Will fill in later

Constatnt whinging about other people or lack of meets on status updates

Constant updates asking for bjs or saying balls need emptying etc

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By *tella HeelsTV/TS
over a year ago

west here ford shire

No face pics

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By *tella HeelsTV/TS
over a year ago

west here ford shire

Straight male

Ha what bollox

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just look at mine it’s shit lol

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By *ntrepid ExplorersCouple
over a year ago

Birmingham

"Just look at mine it’s shit lol "

"Replies"

"WhatsApp"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We have hardly any text yet have more messages and views then ever before x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Just look at mine it’s shit lol

"Replies"

"WhatsApp"

Is it that bad

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Lots of capital letters is a real turn on for us. Really gets the blood flowing.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Lots of capital letters is a real turn on for us. Really gets the blood flowing. "

Really

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By *orace99Man
over a year ago

York

"Lots of capital letters is a real turn on for us. Really gets the blood flowing. "

That's where I am going wrong ??

Mine is shit and contains some of the gripes...... Sounds a bit like my school reports..... "Must do better"

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