FabSwingers.com forum: New straight fem needs advice and an alibi!!!

By *herrystar OP Woman
over a year ago

birmingham

Hi all

Been on the site a couple of weeks and don't know if this is a daft request, but if you don't ask, you don't get.

I'm 37, live in Tamworth and married to a husband who has no idea that I'm doing this. It's proving really difficult to get away to play at weekends/evenings as don't have much of a social life. What I really need is another straight fem as a mate and an alibi for meets, and possibly to go to clubs with (once I build the courage!)

Like I say, not sure if it's a daft thing to ask but have no friends that I want to tell about this new choice of lifestyle, so thought that this might be the way to go!

Thanks for reading!

Cherry x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sits back and waits with interest!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

how sad your poor hubby, wont dont u tell him what your doing and ask him to go with you, if he says no how about sticking to your vows and being faithful

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Tbh I think it's probably the most stupid thing to ask that I've ever seen on this site ...

Why would you even think any self respecting person is gonna be your alibi while you play away from your old man ?

This has got to be a wind up, please tell me it is ....

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By *ensualfire88Man
over a year ago

Edinburgh

Ok.

On the basis that it's not a wind up, and on the basis that it's not for me (or others) to judge anyones lifestyle decisions on this site...

I wouldnt think it would be hard to find a single fem to befriend if thats what you want. There are lot's of single girls on here who have been in bad marriages or relationships and would be kindred spirits.

I would however, strongly advise against going to clubs etc, certainly in the short term - why would you try to keep something secret and then go to a "public" place?

There will, as you will be doubtless be finding out, tons of single (and married) men who will be complicit in your little adventure, but as with all single girls, be wary of a single guy bringing promises, they will usually fail to deliver.

Your life is up to you. Your marriage is your business. At least you have been up front about your situation (assuming your for real), and many, many people on this site arent even that honest.

Just my 2p worth

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Ok.

At least you have been up front about your situation (assuming your for real), and many, many people on this site arent even that honest.

Just my 2p worth"

that always makes me laugh? upfront with who? the people who dont matter but cant be upfront with the person she is ment to love lol says a lot about a person

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sad that you find it nessasary to do that

Is there no way you could do it together?

Trying to get others involed in deciet is not really the best way to go

Good luck x

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By *ensualfire88Man
over a year ago

Edinburgh

Just don't think this is the place to judge anyones choices, whether i, you or anyone approves.

How many "single guys" on here are married guys looking for a bit on the side? Loads

How many women will happily meet and have sex with married guys playing away from home on here? Loads

How many single girls on here are married women getting a wee kick from having a profile on a swinger site but will never meet anyone? Loads.

How many of your frinds and family would go ballistic if they knew you were swingers? Loads.

Peoples lifestyle decisions are theirs and theirs alone to make.

Who am i, or anyone else to judge them?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There is no way i was judging after all how can a bisexual dawarf (me) judge anyone lol

Was just trying to put another point of view x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

you where very judgmental there, as i think you will find ALL my friends and most of my family know what i do lmao/

this is a swinging site not a cheating site. if u think swinging means u have no need to be honest then go for it.

you make vows u keep to them, swinging does not make u expemt from it! its like your saying swingers cant have morals and should just think everything is ok. well your wrong love

cheating is WRONG swinging is NOT cheating.

and i have no problem stating that i personailly think cheaters are dishonest lyers and not worth time or effort as you can not trust them.

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By *ensualfire88Man
over a year ago

Edinburgh

No.

What i'm saying is each persons morals are their own decision.Most swingers will be as, if not more s moral than anyone else. (kinda depends on whether you see sex as a moral issue atall, but that's a whole other thread)

You wouldnt meet a cheater. I respect that as a decision thats yours to make. is the right or moral decision - though i can understand why people would be against it.

The original reason for my post was at least the person at the top was honest enough to admit they were going to be dishonest....oh fuck it i give up, where's that bisexual dwarf, i've been looking for one of them for ages....??!

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By *andKCouple
over a year ago

Norfolk

so glad K and I are in this equally together no need for any kind of deceit what-so-ever

(and before craig says anything we have two seats in the tent!)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i dont agree nothing honest about a cheater as they dont tell the person who it matters to. and in MY eyes is WRONG but anyway the midgit is in my nickers i let her go in a bit lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"i dont agree nothing honest about a cheater as they dont tell the person who it matters to. and in MY eyes is WRONG but anyway the midgit is in my nickers i let her go in a bit lol"

Kity the bi miget is me lol not Les

Craig xx

Sensual fire now takes big gulp lol x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My marriage had gone stale and i felt neglected and found myself venturing onto a swinging site. I thought it would just add a bit of spice to my boring little life but how naive i was. It might seem really exciting having a dabble behind the hubby' s back. But trust me it isnt nearly so amusing watching the person you love hurting .

So no i wont be offering the hand of freindship to this lady.

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By *ensualfire88Man
over a year ago

Edinburgh

Fuck it, who am i to judge you, let's meet!

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By *ensualfire88Man
over a year ago

Edinburgh

And just to be clear - I understand perfectly where you are coming from and why. I've been in a similar situation myself in the past and it's not nice.

Everyone has to make their own desisions. But they also have to live with the consequences.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Fuck it, who am i to judge you, let's meet!"

not with them fookin socks pmsfl

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Fuck it, who am i to judge you, let's meet!

not with them fookin socks pmsfl

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By *ensualfire88Man
over a year ago

Edinburgh

I don't judge anyone, but i draw the line at doing it with a cartoon character...just seems wrong...!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think the socks are cute, bit like babies bed socks... god that sounds wrong lol.

I feel like a right wise old bird , we are all naive when we take up this debauched hobby. I just hate seeing otehr people making same mistakes i did.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i made the mistake of hurting someone who loved me due to swinging, its the biggest regret of my life hurting her, so would say honesty is the best. but we all have our own life and reasons for doing what we do. i would never judge. just hope what ever happens it makes you happy

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By *herrystar OP Woman
over a year ago

birmingham

So sorry that people have misinterpreted me. I am in a marriage that is not working with someone despite my efforts, gives very little back. It has not been an easy decision for me to make coming down this route and really wish I hadn't posted now as didn't expect people to go for the jugular.

Have suggested swinging to my husband, just isn't interested. Has slept with me twice in 12 months and god knows I've tried everything I can think of. My rabbit has almost worn out!

I'm not a bad person generally, but need more than I'm getting and wanted someone who is maybe in the same boat as me to experience this with. realise people have strong views on this now and like I said, wish I hadn't posted but I think everyone is on here for diferent reasons and unlike many, I'm being honest about mine.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

your not honest, you told your hubby u planning to do this? no thats not honest is it. why dont u leave him if u aint happy? and u cant bring love into the reason for staying with him, u dont plan on hurting someone you love do u?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

and i am feeling a bit bad cos u might be a really nice person, but why does a really nice person want to cheat on someone she made vows with?

if i was with someone and i was not getting what i needed to be happy i would go rather then cheat.

i am sorry if i seem harsh i just cant stand people syaing they love someone then choosing to go behnd their back. maybe i dont understand it, but i just feel its so wrong and i feel stongly about it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"your not honest, you told your hubby u planning to do this? no thats not honest is it. why dont u leave him if u aint happy? and u cant bring love into the reason for staying with him, u dont plan on hurting someone you love do u?"

sometimes in life things arent that simple, there are many different factors, who are we to jugde. nobody is perfect.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

oh irs very simple, u cheat or not. u aint that thick are ya

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By *ensualfire88Man
over a year ago

Edinburgh

Kitty,

i think your heart is in the right place and i can see exaclty where you're coming from. Please don't think i'm condoning cheating just for the sake of it, i've been in the situation and it's shit.

BUT, the fact is babes, you're 25, turning 26 happy birthday when it comes) and one of the things you will find out, and have to deal with as you get older, is life isnt always as simple as we would like it to be. Things get complicated as you get older, and you end up one way or another, letting go of some of your ideals.

It's hard to explain, but it just kinda happens. There are loads of really really good people trapped in shit lives, not necesarily through their own making. And when you're in that situation, sometimes you just have to do what you gotta do, even though it's not what you would really want.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

situation, been there twice on diffrent sides. wont go into detail but i know and i think its wrong

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

no i am not thick, but doesnt matter what anyones says you will only see it from your point of view. but we are all welcome to express it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"situation, been there twice on diffrent sides. wont go into detail but i know and i think its wrong"

at the end of the day people do what they feel is the right thing for then. no onecan tell them what to do or not to do.

marriages are not all perfect trust me i been there.

hope you find what your lookin for hun

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

thats not very nice naughty kitty

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"situation, been there twice on diffrent sides. wont go into detail but i know and i think its wrong

at the end of the day people do what they feel is the right thing for then. no onecan tell them what to do or not to do.

marriages are not all perfect trust me i been there.

hope you find what your lookin for hun "

aint u still dribbling that 35 times worth of cum out of ya crack hun lmao

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"thats not very nice naughty kitty "

forgive me

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By *ensualfire88Man
over a year ago

Edinburgh

Kitty,

You'll find most of us have been there at one time or another on one side or another, i know i have and it hurt like fuck.

I wouldnt wish it on my worst enemy.

But i also know people who have the same amount of pain because they are trapped with no way out and no prosepect of it getting better.

It's sad to say in this day and age, but there are still a lot of women who have no economic power in the relationship and have no means of escape when it turns to shit.

The person i love most in the world is in that situation and she cant get out. Thats why we're not together anymore, and thats why i'm here.

Right and wrong is easy when you're young. It's black and white. Later in life, as with so many things, it becomes shades of grey...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i like you, ur lucky lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

xxxxxxxxx Kitty xxxxxxxxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Kitty,

You'll find most of us have been there at one time or another on one side or another, i know i have and it hurt like fuck.

I wouldnt wish it on my worst enemy.

But i also know people who have the same amount of pain because they are trapped with no way out and no prosepect of it getting better.

It's sad to say in this day and age, but there are still a lot of women who have no economic power in the relationship and have no means of escape when it turns to shit.

The person i love most in the world is in that situation and she cant get out. Thats why we're not together anymore, and thats why i'm here.

Right and wrong is easy when you're young. It's black and white. Later in life, as with so many things, it becomes shades of grey..."

couldnt have put it better. well said.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Kitty,

You'll find most of us have been there at one time or another on one side or another, i know i have and it hurt like fuck.

I wouldnt wish it on my worst enemy.

But i also know people who have the same amount of pain because they are trapped with no way out and no prosepect of it getting better.

It's sad to say in this day and age, but there are still a lot of women who have no economic power in the relationship and have no means of escape when it turns to shit.

The person i love most in the world is in that situation and she cant get out. Thats why we're not together anymore, and thats why i'm here.

Right and wrong is easy when you're young. It's black and white. Later in life, as with so many things, it becomes shades of grey...

couldnt have put it better. well said."

u could have tried

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By *im53Man
over a year ago

Boldon

yes life does get complicated as you get older.lol

after my late wife had our daughter sex went of the menu, we slept in the same bed, but in 13 yrs after sex was about twice a year.

but never thought of cheating. only in the last few years have i started to swing.

i still dont like people who play away and wont play with them if i know thats what they are doing

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"yes life does get complicated as you get older.lol

after my late wife had our daughter sex went of the menu, we slept in the same bed, but in 13 yrs after sex was about twice a year.

but never thought of cheating. only in the last few years have i started to swing.

i still dont like people who play away and wont play with them if i know thats what they are doing"

now thats a real man!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yep a really nice man at that x

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By *im53Man
over a year ago

Boldon

"yes life does get complicated as you get older.lol

after my late wife had our daughter sex went of the menu, we slept in the same bed, but in 13 yrs after sex was about twice a year.

but never thought of cheating. only in the last few years have i started to swing.

i still dont like people who play away and wont play with them if i know thats what they are doing

now thats a real man!"

thanks kitty £10 is in the post lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"yes life does get complicated as you get older.lol

after my late wife had our daughter sex went of the menu, we slept in the same bed, but in 13 yrs after sex was about twice a year.

but never thought of cheating. only in the last few years have i started to swing.

i still dont like people who play away and wont play with them if i know thats what they are doing

now thats a real man!"

A true down to earth Northern Guy .. only about 15 miles from us, just goes to prove Kitty us Northerners are the salt of the earth

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By *ensualfire88Man
over a year ago

Edinburgh

Kitty,

You'll never know how hard we both tried.

I believe in love babes, always have, always will, you'll never change me on that one.

But life sometimes has a way of dealing you a hand you just can't play.

It's not fair. It's not right. It shouldnt be like that. Bur sometimes, it just is. It's not necesarrily anyones fault, just a set of circumstances that conspire against you.

Enjoy your youth kitt and use it both well and wisely. One day you'll be our age, and hopefully, like us, you'll still be saying "yeah, bring it on" and you won't get too down when guys you like won't meet anyone your age...you won't mind, becasue you'll remeber what it was like to be young, and you'll be happy ad contented being 40 something, knowing you've seen more of the ups and downs of life than they young ones, and knowing you're a better, more rounded person for it.

And the good news is, you can still have sex with people you meet on the internet, yeeee-fucking--ha!

Don't judge the girl who put the original post up unitl you've walked a mile in her shoes.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"yes life does get complicated as you get older.lol

after my late wife had our daughter sex went of the menu, we slept in the same bed, but in 13 yrs after sex was about twice a year.

but never thought of cheating. only in the last few years have i started to swing.

i still dont like people who play away and wont play with them if i know thats what they are doing"

i commend you for that, wish we all were so strong life would be simpler

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

change my mind, i DID like you but now u are just patronising me, yea i may be young BUT i still know that when u get wed no matter of wht goes on u have vow u make to promise to be faithfull. no one has to stay with anyone and if they are claimin to be in a abusive relainship if they are able to get out to shag then they are able to get away.

i will judge anyone who cheats as CHEATING IS WRONG and is no excuse for it EVER just cos i am young dont mean i dont know right from wrong mate, if a relainship is wrong the awnser is not to cheat. simple as that. in my eyes there is and will never be an excuse for it. ages does not even come into it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i commend you for that, wish we all were so strong life would be simpler"

life can be such a simple thing......us humans like to complicate matters though............go study philosophy and it will make you strong

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"change my mind, i DID like you but now u are just patronising me, yea i may be young BUT i still know that when u get wed no matter of wht goes on u have vow u make to promise to be faithfull. no one has to stay with anyone and if they are claimin to be in a abusive relainship if they are able to get out to shag then they are able to get away.

Good point it nothing to do with age x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Kitty,

You'll never know how hard we both tried.

I believe in love babes, always have, always will, you'll never change me on that one.

But life sometimes has a way of dealing you a hand you just can't play.

It's not fair. It's not right. It shouldnt be like that. Bur sometimes, it just is. It's not necesarrily anyones fault, just a set of circumstances that conspire against you.

And the good news is, you can still have sex with people you meet on the internet, yeeee-fucking--ha!

Don't judge the girl who put the original post up unitl you've walked a mile in her shoes."

A very good post, but I'm not sure that people are judging this person because she is cheating, well not us anyway, we don't agree with cheating in any form but our main gripe with this lady is that she is asking for someone to be an alibi ...

Now by all means if she wants to cheat, it's her life and up to her what she does, but how dare she ask members of ths site to give her an alibi ..

That is bang out of order

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Kitty,

You'll never know how hard we both tried.

I believe in love babes, always have, always will, you'll never change me on that one.

But life sometimes has a way of dealing you a hand you just can't play.

It's not fair. It's not right. It shouldnt be like that. Bur sometimes, it just is. It's not necesarrily anyones fault, just a set of circumstances that conspire against you.

And the good news is, you can still have sex with people you meet on the internet, yeeee-fucking--ha!

Don't judge the girl who put the original post up unitl you've walked a mile in her shoes."

maybe its help she needs in how to get out a dead relationship rather than an alibi..........life is way too short to continue in an unhappy relationship no matter what.......

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By *ensualfire88Man
over a year ago

Edinburgh

Nobody is patronising you Kitty, and if it's coming across that way it's not meant to.

I admire your strength of conviction.

I admire the way you stick to your principles.

I admiore the way you stand up for yourself.

You are going to do just fine in life.

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By *ensualfire88Man
over a year ago

Edinburgh

[Removed by poster at 01/08/09 23:56:13]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Bloody hell, look what you have started, maybe marriage counselling is what you need not a swinging site. Good luck xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I agree with Kitty, it took me 19 years to get away from an abusive d*unk of a husband who loved the bottle and his pub pals more than me and our kids, I lost my job when I left him and was on the dole with two small kids,a fick off big mortgage, and debt he had run up but I never once thought to cheat or ask others to aid and abet me....I walked away from a dead marriage with no money with a small family but my pride intact.

sorry to have been so personal

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I agree with Kitty, it took me 19 years to get away from an abusive d*unk of a husband who loved the bottle and his pub pals more than me and our kids, I lost my job when I left him and was on the dole with two small kids,a fick off big mortgage, and debt he had run up but I never once thought to cheat or ask others to aid and abet me....I walked away from a dead marriage with no money with a small family but my pride intact.

sorry to have been so personal

Must have been very difficult to do but I admire you for it and hope things turned out for the best

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

sorry to have been so personal

Must have been very difficult to do but I admire you for it and hope things turned out for the best

Things got better things got worse, but I have always had my pride to pick me up and dust me down xxx won,t bore anyone with any more details, soz xxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think the OP annoyed peeps so much because it was so flippant... '' oooo swingy folks, i want to have some fun behind my hubby's back, can someone lie for me? hee hee'.. I wasnt being judgemental, just giving my opinion as a woman who thought having a bit of ' fun ' without hubby wouldnt do any harm. I tell you it isnt funny when your hubby drives you to the GUM clinic and you tell the nice folks there that no you dont know much about the man who fucked you...... sorry for being so honest, but this woman really ought to know that it aint like in the movies ...

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By *ensualfire88Man
over a year ago

Edinburgh

They have Swinging movies??

Cool, i'm off down my local multiplex!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

if a guy had posted this , i doubt some ppl would have been as understanding

infact a guy did post something similar a while ago, he got slaughtered , never to be seen again

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You want my tottal honesty.......get out of your marraige, if its not working why stay??? Life can be very short at times so go for it and break free! .....that way you wont have to tell lies, make excuses etc.......

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

personally, i never understand anyone who stays in a marriage if they aint happy, ive got 2 divorces behind me, i walked out on both , the 1st i left with the clothes i stood in, the 2nd i got everything , yr self respect is far more important than being unhappy .

blimey i've wrote something sensible

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By *adchickCouple
over a year ago

Cyprus

"personally, i never understand anyone who stays in a marriage if they aint happy, ive got 2 divorces behind me, i walked out on both , the 1st i left with the clothes i stood in, the 2nd i got everything , yr self respect is far more important than being unhappy .

blimey i've wrote something sensible

I totally agree.

I walked out of two marriages. One with a smashed jaw and the clothes I got carted off in the ambulance in, and I got the kids from the second.

I survived. No woman is ever left homeless and if she has kids, she is never left with no money (at least Tony Blair did something right)

Between Child Tax Credit, Working Tax Credit, Child Benefit, Housing Benefit and everything else, a woman with children may not have alot of money but she has enough to live, feed and clothe on.

I HATE cheaters who infest swinging sites because they see it as an easy way of getting their leg over or a bit of affection. Swinging is NOT about cheating, it is about honesty, integrity, fun and laughter. It is not about looking over your shoulder wondering if some scorned wife/husband is about to burst into the room brandishing a bucketful of tears and a "I've been wronged" attitude.

Cheaters are cheaters..... pure and simple.

Swingers are swingers, with couples who do what they do with the full knowledge and trust of the other partner.

Singles do it because they are either swingers or because they think it's an easy way to get a shag (yeah right!!)

Cheaters, in what ever form, be they male or female, dwarf, lesbian, gay or purple with yellow spots....... are just that......... CHEATERS!

If someone won't get out of a bad marriage, then thats their own fault and asking for an alibi is just short of pathetic.

**and by the way..... I'm 42, been the subject of a very violent ex husband, a virilent cheater, raised 3 kids on my own, been to university as a mature student, found my own career and my own life........ I've got life experience. Does that make me better than Kitty? No.... her opinion is just as important and her life is probably harder than mine!**

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Wow ! Maddie ..

You certainly took command of the thread there

Nice one, but it's true what you say, cheating is big fat no no, but coming into a site and asking somebody to be your alibi .. ffs whats that all about ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

to the original poster..

i dont think it is wise to ask anyone to be your alibi..as you are basically asking someone to lie for you..and thats not on.

As to your situation...well you dont own anyone an explanation, however this post has opened you up to that.

Everyone has a story to tell and an opinion. Doesnt mean they are right and you are wrong.

I would say that my experience has taught me that whilst what you are considering may be the answwer..you will find that it poses more issues in the long run.

I am someone that strong believes that if your marriage is not working..then get out. Regardless of money, kids, jobs etc..leave..be your own person and you will be a better person for it....but thats just my opinion.

Unlike the morals brigade, I wont judge you..for unless anyone has walked in your shoes they can only imagine and guess at the rights and wrongs of the situation.

Bottom line..think long and hard, do what is right for you..but do not compromise the morals of another to get there.

vol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

As to the age issue in this thread...

ffs age makes a HUGE difference to a persons views!!

We are all very different people from 5 years ago or 10 or 20..as life experience and what we learn as we grow older moulds who we are and colours our opinions. To suggest otherwise is foolish.

When i was in my 20's I would never have considered swinging..now in my late 30's i think its the best thing since sliced bread.

In my 20's i believed that marriage was for life and you stuck by all your vows....a life time later and i see that as lovely an ideal it was..the reality can be very different for all sorts of reasons.

Everyone is entitled to an opinion and their own moral code....doesnt make yours any more right than someone elses though.

Sensual hit the nail on the head with the 'walking in someone elses shoes' line.

vol

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By *andKCouple
over a year ago

Norfolk

blimey i've wrote something sensible

I totally agree.

I walked out of two marriages. One with a smashed jaw and the clothes I got carted off in the ambulance in, and I got the kids from the second.

I survived. No woman is ever left homeless and if she has kids, she is never left with no money (at least Tony Blair did something right)

Between Child Tax Credit, Working Tax Credit, Child Benefit, Housing Benefit and everything else, a woman with children may not have alot of money but she has enough to live, feed and clothe on.

Cheaters are cheaters..... pure and simple.

Swingers are swingers, with couples who do what they do with the full knowledge and trust of the other partner.

Singles do it because they are either swingers or because they think it's an easy way to get a shag (yeah right!!)

Cheaters, in what ever form, be they male or female, dwarf, lesbian, gay or purple with yellow spots....... are just that......... CHEATERS!

If someone won't get out of a bad marriage, then thats their own fault and asking for an alibi is just short of pathetic.

wow so agree with all you have said and just sooooooooo glad we (K and me) haven't had to experience any of it. We took 28 years to decide swinging was something we wanted to do, wouldn't swp it for the world but if either of us wanted to stop today the other one would no if's or but's. But that is probably for another thread, what I'm trying to say is everything is out in the open, we've changed our 'rules' as we've gone on but they have been joint decisions and therefore never any need to have secrets. Its actually improved our relationship in our 'real' life too

Ok I've gone on far to much sorry.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

as a man who hates cheaters i really hope the reason he has only had sex with you twice in a year is cause he's getting elsewhere

sorry to be rude but you deserve it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"as a man who hates cheaters i really hope the reason he has only had sex with you twice in a year is cause he's getting elsewhere

sorry to be rude but you deserve it

i gotta say that is harsh !!!!!

everyone has there own issues and reasons for what they do and life is about being happy and is far to short to be anything else its unfair to judge someone like that i bet eveyone who has posted has some skelletons thay are hiding !!!!!!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"as a man who hates cheaters i really hope the reason he has only had sex with you twice in a year is cause he's getting elsewhere

sorry to be rude but you deserve it

i gotta say that is harsh !!!!!

harsh

imagine your the husband

life is to be happy

does his life not count

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"as a man who hates cheaters i really hope the reason he has only had sex with you twice in a year is cause he's getting elsewhere

sorry to be rude but you deserve it

i gotta say that is harsh !!!!!

harsh

imagine your the husband

life is to be happy

does his life not count "

yes it does but if he has been cheating dont you think that was wrong to begin with ????? kind of a contradiction i think , i just think sometimes things happen that you find hard to control in the perfect way thats all x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

did we say he's been cheating NO

we said we hope he is and she can control whats happening like stated above she should just walk away

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"As to the age issue in this thread...

ffs age makes a HUGE difference to a persons views!!

We are all very different people from 5 years ago or 10 or 20..as life experience and what we learn as we grow older moulds who we are and colours our opinions. To suggest otherwise is foolish.

When i was in my 20's I would never have considered swinging..now in my late 30's i think its the best thing since sliced bread.

Everyone is entitled to an opinion and their own moral code....doesnt make yours any more right than someone elses though.

Sensual hit the nail on the head with the 'walking in someone elses shoes' line.

vol

xx"

ages makes a huge diffrence does it? how do u know i have not walked in the shoes what do u know about my life? people assume cos of my age i know shit, well ya wrong there love. in my 25 years i have delt with more then most in their 50's

i was in a abusive relainship for 6 years . never once did i cheat on him! he did on me.

i buried my daughter 5 years ago and right now i am a single mother to a disabled daughter and a baby who has just spent the last 9 weeks in special care. and i do all this ALONE with no help from family.

i think my life experence from what i have delt with a gone through ables me to make comments and understand certian things.

for you to sit there and think age is an issues your wrong. from m,y meer 25 years on this world i have learnt and delt with a lot then many people would know. i wont go into detail on everything i have been through but going through it all has made me older then my years.

and it does not matter what age you re 18 or 80 a marrage vow is a marrage vow.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Our Respect to you Kitty xx

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By *thwalescplCouple
over a year ago

brecon

"as a man who hates cheaters i really hope the reason he has only had sex with you twice in a year is cause he's getting elsewhere

sorry to be rude but you deserve it "

Man thats complete bollox!!!

Talk about a contradiction in terms, one second saying cheating is bad, next breath saying I hope he's cheating on you cos you deserve it?

As a mere mortal, I dont think it is my place to judge others, life will pass its own sentence on all of us.

For the record, my opinion (right or wrong), is that the OP is going about this the wrong way.

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By *adchickCouple
over a year ago

Cyprus

"As to the age issue in this thread...

ffs age makes a HUGE difference to a persons views!!

We are all very different people from 5 years ago or 10 or 20..as life experience and what we learn as we grow older moulds who we are and colours our opinions. To suggest otherwise is foolish.

When i was in my 20's I would never have considered swinging..now in my late 30's i think its the best thing since sliced bread.

Everyone is entitled to an opinion and their own moral code....doesnt make yours any more right than someone elses though.

Sensual hit the nail on the head with the 'walking in someone elses shoes' line.

vol

i was in a abusive relainship for 6 years . never once did i cheat on him! he did on me.

i think my life experence from what i have delt with a gone through ables me to make comments and understand certian things.

and it does not matter what age you re 18 or 80 a marrage vow is a marrage vow.

Kitty is more of a woman than the OP will ever be.....

And she has more balls than ALL of the "my husband/wife doesn't understand me" cheaters on this site.

You rock girl....... I knew what shite you'd been through and you have always had my respect.

And to the OP....... there's specific sites for 'married and cheating'...... go infest one of those and get your alibi and your kicks elsewhere.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think reading through this whole thread the one word that jumps out at me is RESPECT, for yourself, for the partner you cheat or don't cheat on, for those who would be pulled into duplicity and lies, and for each other and every single viewpoint put across.. please continue to feel it and show it xxxxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Think I'll leave this one .....

Moves on quick lol....

(fancy asking though pmsl) (In here too).... I'm off... x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"So sorry that people have misinterpreted me. I am in a marriage that is not working with someone despite my efforts, gives very little back. It has not been an easy decision for me to make coming down this route and really wish I hadn't posted now as didn't expect people to go for the jugular.

Have suggested swinging to my husband, just isn't interested. Has slept with me twice in 12 months and god knows I've tried everything I can think of. My rabbit has almost worn out!

Got to admit when I first read this post i was tempted to post an indignant rant. Then it crossed my mind that is was a wind up, maily because it's so incredulous that a seemingly intelligent person would expect an alibi to be provided. Even thinking it was a hoax I followed it cos it was interesting to read everyone's input.

Only once did I come near to posting and that would have been a strogly voiced objection to what is clearly the patronisation of one poster by another,. I gave the more honest person kisses instead.

Now a new twist.... I came back to the post.. it's still being read. I still considered it a hoax so looked at the profile .... and WAHOOOOOOO! it's been verified.

So come on chuck. You did the dirty deed on Aug 1st. Now im not moralising. I'd like some insights into how you are handling it all

What WAS your alibi?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Think I'll leave this one .....

Moves on quick lol....

(fancy asking though pmsl) (In here too).... I'm off... x"

me too .... I am too scared ..

ps, did anyone hear the one about 35 jizzes !!!

joking......

bye xxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Think I'll leave this one .....

Moves on quick lol....

(fancy asking though pmsl) (In here too).... I'm off... x"

'Mr Notts over here'

Moves Mr Notts out of room before its to late!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"As to the age issue in this thread...

ffs age makes a HUGE difference to a persons views!!

We are all very different people from 5 years ago or 10 or 20..as life experience and what we learn as we grow older moulds who we are and colours our opinions. To suggest otherwise is foolish.

When i was in my 20's I would never have considered swinging..now in my late 30's i think its the best thing since sliced bread.

Everyone is entitled to an opinion and their own moral code....doesnt make yours any more right than someone elses though.

Sensual hit the nail on the head with the 'walking in someone elses shoes' line.

vol

i was in a abusive relainship for 6 years . never once did i cheat on him! he did on me.

i think my life experence from what i have delt with a gone through ables me to make comments and understand certian things.

and it does not matter what age you re 18 or 80 a marrage vow is a marrage vow.

Fist of all..im not your love..and my post was not intended to harbour any sarcasm nor derogatory undertones....now that being said...

Your age is still your age..that is a fact and a fact that cannot be changed..like it or not...

As a result of that you have not lived as long as someone who is 30 or 40 or 150..that being the case you do not have the life experience or level of maturity that most..(not all) have the older they get. I would also add that many people tend to mellow as they get older

Now it is clear you have had a great deal of life experience SO FAR...but it is only with the accumulation of years that your outlooks and opinions change..or become reinforced. This is simply a fact of time and what we face in our lives. As each decade passes we change and develop as people. This is simply how life works and for good reason.

I would also add that at no time did i say you know 'shit' I am simply stating a fact that time and the rolling on of years changes a person. Equally i can sit here and know ..not think...age is an issue..because it quite simply is!

As to the walking of shoes..clearly you have not walked in the shoes of the original poster..or clearly you would not hold the opinion you do. Experiencing something changes a person..and with all you have experienced im sure previously held ideas and opinions on the issues you have had in your own life have either been changed or reinforced.

You are fully entitled to your opinions and age does not stop you from having them..my point was simply that as each and every one of us looks back we see how we have changed and developed as a person and if you think that you wont change from the person you are now then you are very wrong. In fact to be blunt if anyone who is over 30 has not developed as a person or learned from mistake or the good things in life..then thats saddest of all.

None of this means you need to agree with the original poster today or 20 years in the future..

I dont agree with all she says..but i would fight for her right to feel how she does, to express it and to live her life how she sees fit..and unless anyone of us can say we have always and always will do the right thing in a relationship..then perhaps the stoning should be put on hold

vol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

to me age is just a number.............as you get older.....well dementia and other illnesses kick in......and maybe you see things differently......so as you get older do morals alter???? to me if your marriage is an unhappy one....then maybe that should be your priority to do something about it......if you want to swing.....well thats a seperate issue.....if you wish to meet someone who is willing to lie for you....hmmmmmmm....exactly where does age come into that one???? the thread has undertones of being relevant to age now.......rather than hey i want to cheat behind my shit husband....anyone out there want to lie for me so that i can get some action!!! which makes me think....this "new friend" who has suddenly popped out of nowhere and will act as an alibi.....perhaps the husband might be wondering who this "new friend" is???? just a thought.......if you are of a sensible age and you wish to cheat on your partner then be big enough to do it on your own

thats my thoughts over and done with

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 02/08/09 20:11:27]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

oh and i forgot to say.....i put myself in her shoes.....and irregardless of what situation i found myself in....i would always do what i thought wqas best for me......and thats why i would leave the relationship.

i wouldnt suggest that you solve a problem by creating another......and in my opinion i think the OP is going down this road...........just a wild thought......say the husband finds out.....what would he do to not only his wife but the alibi as well??? an old saying is dont get involved in others domestics.....so im out of this one now....good luck

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 02/08/09 22:10:11]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

ooooh so as u get older you decide its ok to cheat on someone you marry, thanks for letting me know that Love, i shall get ready for that time in my life

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By *emmefataleWoman
over a year ago

dirtybigbadsgirlville

vultures are swooping and being judgemental yet again oh yes all with halos eh???? well to the OP good luck to you girl xxxxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

One persons point of view on here was quite valid..the other..well complete bollocks and from someone who obviously has not been there.

Well done OP, hoping your not thinking that your going to find that kind of honesty from others on here ( or any other swinging sites!).

Cant believe you were hammered for starting a thread on something that is quite common with both sexes and swinging...although really I am not suprised.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"vultures are swooping and being judgemental yet again oh yes all with halos eh???? well to the OP good luck to you girl xxxxx

yeah good luck to the OP......and even more good luck to any potential alibi.........it always amazes me how so many throw the judgemental remark around in these forums.........i take most peoples response to be their opinion in how they would react if "they put on the OP's shoes"....thats what makes these forums so interesting.....we are all different and thankfully so.......so please let the "judgemental vultures" continue to respond as they see fit with or without their halo's

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"vultures are swooping and being judgemental yet again oh yes all with halos eh???? well to the OP good luck to you girl xxxxx

You can only make an informed choice if you have been there, imagining yourself in the persons shoes doesnt work.

You can also get your opinion across without hammering someone because of thier choices.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"vultures are swooping and being judgemental yet again oh yes all with halos eh???? well to the OP good luck to you girl xxxxx

You can only make an informed choice if you have been there, imagining yourself in the persons shoes doesnt work.

You can also get your opinion across without hammering someone because of thier choices."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"vultures are swooping and being judgemental yet again oh yes all with halos eh???? well to the OP good luck to you girl xxxxx

You can only make an informed choice if you have been there, imagining yourself in the persons shoes doesnt work.

You can also get your opinion across without hammering someone because of thier choices."

imagining as you put it is called empathy......and i disagree...it does work.....what does most counsellors up and down the country do???? or have they been in every situation that a client is experiencing???? people have a right to choice.......and as the OP admits to having no friends or social circle plenty of people in here are maybe suggesting she look at solving her mariage problems before seeking a liar!! yeah i agree some posts could be more tactfully written.....but you wont find that in many public forums

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"vultures are swooping and being judgemental yet again oh yes all with halos eh???? well to the OP good luck to you girl xxxxx

You can only make an informed choice if you have been there, imagining yourself in the persons shoes doesnt work.

You can also get your opinion across without hammering someone because of thier choices.

The we shall agree to disagree on the empathy issue.

However I am all for people having an opinion, it is how they put the opinion across.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"vultures are swooping and being judgemental yet again oh yes all with halos eh???? well to the OP good luck to you girl xxxxx

You can only make an informed choice if you have been there, imagining yourself in the persons shoes doesnt work.

You can also get your opinion across without hammering someone because of thier choices.

The we shall agree to disagree on the empathy issue.

However I am all for people having an opinion, it is how they put the opinion across."

agreed on both counts......now there must be a first for a while on a forum thread....ha ha

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"vultures are swooping and being judgemental yet again oh yes all with halos eh???? well to the OP good luck to you girl xxxxx

You can only make an informed choice if you have been there, imagining yourself in the persons shoes doesnt work.

You can also get your opinion across without hammering someone because of thier choices.

The we shall agree to disagree on the empathy issue.

However I am all for people having an opinion, it is how they put the opinion across.

agreed on both counts......now there must be a first for a while on a forum thread....ha ha

indeed lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

On the age issue and experience. Everyone has their own personal baggage which helps them make up their own minds on this or any subject. This baggage is accumulated over years and allows us to make decisions differently as time goes on.

During this thread a number of people have said cheating is just cheating wheras swinging is different. Well, depends who you talk to I suppose. People who are non-swingers, probably wouldn't see the difference.

The motivation for the OP to decide to swing and cheat on her husband could be so complex that she was unable to articulate it in a short paragraph, it might be that she's just a serial cheater. Who knows. But, what is interesting is some of the posts that follow have come from very personal points of view. As in "this happened to me therefore it's wrong" or "my marriage was shit and I didn't cheat". Those are your decisions, not hers. Who knows which one of you is handling it better than the other?

Anyhoo, back to the age thing

to quote Stephen Fry "If you believe the same things at 40 as you did at 20, you've wasted 20 years of your life"

Kitty you sound like you've been dealt a shit deal and dealt with it exceptionally well. I suspect that given your personal strength, 20 years from now, you will be even better at dealing with it. I hope that makes sense.

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

"ooooh so as u get older you decide its ok to cheat on someone you marry, thanks for letting me know that Love, i shall get ready for that time in my life

Kitty, you have dealt with more than I have had to in my life and I am nearly double your age and I admire you for being able to cope, a lot of people would buckle....but I also know what some meant by age makes a difference to how you think.

I know a couple of posts came over very patronising to you and I nearly offered a big shovel to those people, but your views ( not about this subject in particular )change and are totally different when you are older than what they were in your 20,s and I think that is what people meant.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i got bored with them all waffling on and went to wank

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

"i got bored with them all waffling on and went to wank

Was it a good one? lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

it was as it goes nice and sloppy hahaha

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

"it was as it goes nice and sloppy hahaha"

lmao I knew I shouldn't have asked

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

Personally if someone wants to fuck about behind their partners back… well it’s their life.

However, someone looking to drag another person deep into the situation to use as a cover story; take the blame when they are late back, go missing, when their phone is off etc… is (imho) selfish to say the least.

Change the title to “Scapegoat Wanted”

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"......

This has got to be a wind up, please tell me it is ...."

No, that was the woman wanting someone to get her pregnant as she couldn't get pregnant via her partner...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Have suggested swinging to my husband, just isn't interested. Has slept with me twice in 12 months and god knows I've tried everything I can think of. My rabbit has almost worn out!

I'm sure there are people on here that could help you. Ignore most people on her with their morals (it's a sex site, meetNfuck). As you have identified that you could get your sexual itch scratched on this site, with none of the issues with a relationship.

I'm sure some have written private messages to oyu to help.

Good luck.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A vow is a vow...hmmm interesting statement to make on a swinging site!

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

"...I'm sure there are people on here that could help you. Ignore most people on her with their morals (it's a sex site, meetNfuck). "

and there lies your ignorance!!!!!!!

It's a swinging site. The difference is probably too subtle for some brains to understand.

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

Being abusive to someone is not allowed on these forums.

The post has been removed and sorry to anyone who quoted the post as that had to removed too.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

since when??

Oh, I see, you can only be abuseive if your subtle about it...I get it now!

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

lol.....just an observation, am having a wicked day.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Infidelity is deception at it's most vile. Between wife and husband. Between Friends. Between heteros, bi's , gays.

Between parent and child. Employer and Employee. Your God and you.

In it's simplest form it's called LYING. To lie is to betray trust. You cannot love the one you deceive. These are not the morals of any individual they are our societies morals. Our mores and norms.

Without TRUST there is nothing.

Having a hard cock does not overide this.

Fucking behind your partners back is NOT a definition of swinging.

By assuming swinging legitimises deceit ... you lose any credibility.

It is only swinging if your partner knows AND accepts.( The accepts being crucial )

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By *andKCouple
over a year ago

Norfolk

"Infidelity is deception at it's most vile. Between wife and husband. Between Friends. Between heteros, bi's , gays.

Between parent and child. Employer and Employee. Your God and you.

In it's simplest form it's called LYING. To lie is to betray trust. You cannot love the one you deceive. These are not the morals of any individual they are our societies morals. Our mores and norms.

Without TRUST there is nothing.

Having a hard cock does not overide this.

Fucking behind your partners back is NOT a definition of swinging.

By assuming swinging legitimises deceit ... you lose any credibility.

It is only swinging if your partner knows AND accepts.( The accepts being crucial )

not got involved in this thread as it seems to be getting very nasty but have to agree that for us the definition of swinging is exactly how Granny puts it in the last line of her response "It is only swinging if your partner knows AND accepts."

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

"Infidelity is deception at it's most vile. Between wife and husband. Between Friends. Between heteros, bi's , gays.

Between parent and child. Employer and Employee. Your God and you.

In it's simplest form it's called LYING. To lie is to betray trust. You cannot love the one you deceive. These are not the morals of any individual they are our societies morals. Our mores and norms.

Without TRUST there is nothing.

Having a hard cock does not overide this.

Fucking behind your partners back is NOT a definition of swinging.

By assuming swinging legitimises deceit ... you lose any credibility.

It is only swinging if your partner knows AND accepts.( The accepts being crucial )

Big thumbs up from over here also

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"...I'm sure there are people on here that could help you. Ignore most people on her with their morals (it's a sex site, meetNfuck).

and there lies your ignorance!!!!!!!

It's a swinging site. The difference is probably too subtle for some brains to understand."

Do you meet and fuck with people?

Or care to share your enlightenment with me and others?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Being abusive to someone is not allowed on these forums.

The post has been removed and sorry to anyone who quoted the post as that had to removed too."

Ok, I will practise being more subtle when faced with overly moralising and the 'my view is this' and so should yours, from other posters...

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

"...I'm sure there are people on here that could help you. Ignore most people on her with their morals (it's a sex site, meetNfuck).

and there lies your ignorance!!!!!!!

It's a swinging site. The difference is probably too subtle for some brains to understand.

Do you meet and fuck with people?

Or care to share your enlightenment with me and others?"

You have been on the site for 7 months, not a huge amount of time but still long enough to have grasped the varying views of what swinging is to different people. So if you don't 'get it' by now I doubt anything I could post will help you understand.

You carry on with your belief that a swinging site is just a sex site where everyone just wants to meet and fuck and nothing more to it than that; nothing more complex like trust and relationships, values and respect, friendships and honesty.

Actually if we get down to it - my beliefs include singles (genuinely single or shagging on the side) meeting for a leg-over has got naff-all to do with swinging... just because you shag it don't make it swinging!

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By *andKCouple
over a year ago

Norfolk

"...I'm sure there are people on here that could help you. Ignore most people on her with their morals (it's a sex site, meetNfuck).

and there lies your ignorance!!!!!!!

It's a swinging site. The difference is probably too subtle for some brains to understand.

Do you meet and fuck with people?

Or care to share your enlightenment with me and others?

Polo, I so don't (unfortunately) meet any of your criteria for a meet but I certainly agree with your views xxxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm sure some have written private messages to oyu to help.

Good luck. "

I'd have posted earlier but was busy ringing all the people we have made friends with.. shared good times as well as great sex with.. Talk about other things and sex with...

Might be a meet and fuck site to some... (Not sure who) but to us and i'd suspect many many others... Its far more.. Living proof!

What about socials, events then.. all just to meet and fuck are they..

Twaddle pmsl.. Utter utter twaddle lol..

Say more about you than the rest... Sorry!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Oh dear.

Singles = meeting for a leg over?

Couples = ??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We have friends who are single too lol...

Maybe were wrong... but most singles love the sex yes... but they do like friendship too...

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

"Oh dear.

Singles = meeting for a leg over?

Couples = ?? "

There's no "oh dear" about it.

If a man meets a woman (or vice versa) and they have sex it's a leg-over, a shag, a fuck, a screw, a good humping, a bit of how's ya father... see it has enough names already without having to try and call it something it is not. If 1-2-1 sex is swinging then every sexually active person on the planet is swinging.

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By *andKCouple
over a year ago

Norfolk

"We have friends who are single too lol...

Maybe were wrong... but most singles love the sex yes... but they do like friendship too... "

have to say we have a wide circle of swinging friends from scotland to spain mainly it has to be admitted they are couples but we are pleased to say there are single males and females amongst them any that we have met that are in it for the wham bam thank you mam have never made it past firdt base

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I got that point the first time Polo and although I don't want to I have to ( by my own definitions ) agree.

I just don't think it has to be thought of or described in such derogatory terms.

Cos let's face it - Swingers may be Swingers but the sex is no more pure.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Moot point.

If a hubby or wife are aware that their partner is having sex with another but they are not involved in any way.

Single sex OR Swinging ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"...I'm sure there are people on here that could help you. Ignore most people on her with their morals (it's a sex site, meetNfuck).

and there lies your ignorance!!!!!!!

It's a swinging site. The difference is probably too subtle for some brains to understand.

Do you meet and fuck with people?

Or care to share your enlightenment with me and others?

Theres me thinking swinging was meting like minded people for sex, without complications. If you then become social friends as well, then that's a bonus, if that's what you want.

But I will leave it at that.

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

"I got that point the first time Polo and although I don't want to I have to ( by my own definitions ) agree.

I just don't think it has to be thought of or described in such derogatory terms.

Cos let's face it - Swingers may be Swingers but the sex is no more pure. "

I have never said it is - hence why I feel no need to pretend when I have a fuck I am swinging.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm sure some have written private messages to oyu to help.

Good luck.

I'd have posted earlier but was busy ringing all the people we have made friends with.. shared good times as well as great sex with.. Talk about other things and sex with...

Might be a meet and fuck site to some... (Not sure who) but to us and i'd suspect many many others... Its far more.. Living proof!

What about socials, events then.. all just to meet and fuck are they..

Twaddle pmsl.. Utter utter twaddle lol..

Say more about you than the rest... Sorry!

Are you saying the only way you can make friends is via a swing site?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Thankyou ....

and the first moot point??

Then this one please. As I am visiting a swingers club with a male friend - when we swap n share are we ( in your opinon ) swinging ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Oh dear.

Singles = meeting for a leg over?

Couples = ??

There's no "oh dear" about it.

Not correct, I'm here to meet a few people for sex. I seem to get bored with the same person after a while. Guess it's a bit like roast beef every day, I want a change. I honestly though that is the whole point of swinging. Meet other people for fun and sex with no complications.

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

[Removed by poster at 03/08/09 16:56:39]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"[Removed by poster at 03/08/09 16:56:39]"

Was '*sigh*'

I know, and you think we are all adults on this site. Some are supposed to be professionals

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

"Being abusive to someone is not allowed on these forums.

The post has been removed and sorry to anyone who quoted the post as that had to removed too.

Ok, I will practise being more subtle when faced with overly moralising and the 'my view is this' and so should yours, from other posters... "

Sorry?

If people want to say their morals are the only ones people should listen to how do you think I can stop that?

Being judgemental isn't against any rules.

I won't do it, but I can't stop anyone else doing it unless they are abusive as you were.

As for what you think I should do, I only answer to Admin, so don't try throwing your weight around with me, it won't work.

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

"[Removed by poster at 03/08/09 16:56:39]

Was '*sigh*'

I know, and you think we are all adults on this site. Some are supposed to be professionals

And some people lose any sense of argument when they start they resort to swearing at people instead of just airing their veiw.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Say more about you than the rest... Sorry!

Are you saying the only way you can make friends is via a swing site?"

I'm sorry... did it come accross like that?? Far from... what we have found is we have made even more friends via swinging.. and good ones!.. If your here to meet and fuck so be it... were not!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"[And some people lose any sense of argument when they start they resort to swearing at people instead of just airing their veiw."

I didn't before ya go fiddlin with ya buttons lol...

Meanie ya... x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Being abusive to someone is not allowed on these forums.

The post has been removed and sorry to anyone who quoted the post as that had to removed too.

Ok, I will practise being more subtle when faced with overly moralising and the 'my view is this' and so should yours, from other posters...

Sorry?

If people want to say their morals are the only ones people should listen to how do you think I can stop that?

Delete the post, I know you know how to.

Being judgemental isn't against any rules.

I won't do it, but I can't stop anyone else doing it unless they are abusive as you were.

Nothing wrong being judgmental, but telling someone this is wrong and that is wrong and you must agree to my morals, maybe should be deleted.

As for what you think I should do, I only answer to Admin, so don't try throwing your weight around with me, it won't work."

I'm certainly am not throwing my weight around, merely pointing out that some incidences and how mods can do a better job if the will was there. As have theres. I don't know what deal you have with admin re Mod, but I can only see what you do or don't do

I see a mod (all, in any moderated online forums) a bit like a chair in a meeting, helping the meeting along, keeping it on track, etc etc.

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

"[And some people lose any sense of argument when they start they resort to swearing at people instead of just airing their veiw.

I didn't before ya go fiddlin with ya buttons lol...

Meanie ya... x

Wasn't you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I wanna be a Mod... I'd be ace...

Boom, they are gone.... Problem sorted pmsl..

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

"Moot point.

If a hubby or wife are aware that their partner is having sex with another but they are not involved in any way.

Single sex OR Swinging ? "

If the partner is not involved in anyway - sex.

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago

"Being abusive to someone is not allowed on these forums.

The post has been removed and sorry to anyone who quoted the post as that had to removed too.

Ok, I will practise being more subtle when faced with overly moralising and the 'my view is this' and so should yours, from other posters...

Sorry?

If people want to say their morals are the only ones people should listen to how do you think I can stop that?

Delete the post, I know you know how to.

Being judgemental isn't against any rules.

I won't do it, but I can't stop anyone else doing it unless they are abusive as you were.

Nothing wrong being judgmental, but telling someone this is wrong and that is wrong and you must agree to my morals, maybe should be deleted.

As for what you think I should do, I only answer to Admin, so don't try throwing your weight around with me, it won't work.

I see a mod (all, in any moderated online forums) a bit like a chair in a meeting, helping the meeting along, keeping it on track, etc etc."

well we don't have to answer to you only the owners and to be honest you would find something to moan about us mods whatever we do

why don't you take your concerns to the owners im sure they will look into them for you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Or make me a Mod...

Boom.... Problem sorted pmsl..

Ohhhhhhhhh How I'd laugh!!! lol..

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

"Thankyou ....

and the first moot point??

Then this one please. As I am visiting a swingers club with a male friend - when we swap n share are we ( in your opinon ) swinging ? "

I'd have no problem with someone calling that swinging.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Too much emphasis on a word... or words.

People are people.. Cheats are just that, cheats.. swingers are lovely...

Call it anything you like.. doesn't change the facts ..

yum Yum Yum....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ha! Ta... xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"........

well we don't have to answer to you only the owners and to be honest you would find something to moan about us mods whatever we do

why don't you take your concerns to the owners im sure they will look into them for you

I'm not asking you to be accountable to me, but maybe just maybe to the forum users in general. As I have mentions I see a mod as a chairperson. As to the suggestion that I would moan about anything you did, I seem to be moaning about the nothing

I have used the feed back forums, have raised a point or 2 in various forms as the arise. I wouldn't for one nano second expect the owners to drop everything and change things. What I would think happens is they look at issues, see what some suggestions are, and then make a few changes in the future if they choose

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

Quoted "Delete the post, I know you know how to."

I do yes, but if I was allowed to delete posts just because someone is saying something that you don't like, the forums well may be empty.

What happens to the people who posted them and have broke no rules?

"quoted "Nothing wrong being judgmental, but telling someone this is wrong and that is wrong and you must agree to my morals, maybe should be deleted."

People are allowed their views, their views are just as important as yours, wether you like them or not.

Again,I can't delete something just because you don't like it.

"quoted "I'm certainly am not throwing my weight around, merely pointing out that some incidences and how mods can do a better job if the will was there. As have theres. I don't know what deal you have with admin re Mod, but I can only see what you do or don't do "

If you have any fedback of how mods do their job, then Admin welcome it.

PS you don't see the half of what mods do.

I see a mod (all, in any moderated online forums) a bit like a chair in a meeting, helping the meeting along, keeping it on track, etc etc."

As I say, mail Admin if you have a problem.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=19xJIedrrfA

Mods eh.... dodgy Buggers pmsl

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

"Oh dear.

Singles = meeting for a leg over?

Couples = ??

There's no "oh dear" about it.

What was it you were saying about telling people they are wrong

So lets apply your comment to couples - do you think couples are here because they are bored with fucking their partners?

Swinging and its original meaning is about couples - people with pre-existing relationships opening the sexual aspect of their relationship to other people.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Uhmmmmmmm just a thought.

The original poster of this thread only came in twice. It's still running though.

Im still undecided as to whether it's a bit of an inside job....

I checked out her 'partner in crime'

Pretty packaging ... but when you weigh it up .....

I'm hoping NEVER to peek in here again.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

could someone kidnap me and hold me in a hole in the ground for 28 days feeding me berries.....

by the time I get released..... this will be over

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

As I say, mail Admin if you have a problem."

I don't, that's the point. But as your keen to point out, your not going to delete someone just because they don't agree with someone.

Anyway, I will let this thread run it's course, and only read the rest of the messages, as my issue has been raised and acknowledged

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

I think the mod did a great job of deleting the appropriate post.... but then I would.... I pushed the 'report' button.

Heated debate - fine.

Directly telling someone (even though it wasn't me) to "f*** off" for expressing their opinion (and an opinion I don't totally agree with either).... IS abusive.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Anyway, I will let this thread run it's course, and only read the rest of the messages, as my issue has been raised and acknowledged

What issue is that then???

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

As I say, mail Admin if you have a problem.

I don't, that's the point. But as your keen to point out, your not going to delete someone just because they don't agree with someone.

Anyway, I will let this thread run it's course, and only read the rest of the messages, as my issue has been raised and acknowledged

Actually I will just point out that I said I am not going to delete a post just because you don't agree with it.

just to clarify of course.

And happy reading.

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago

"could someone kidnap me and hold me in a hole in the ground for 28 days feeding me berries.....

by the time I get released..... this will be over

Ill do it view

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"could someone kidnap me and hold me in a hole in the ground for 28 days feeding me berries.....

by the time I get released..... this will be over

Ill do it view

appreciated

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

..and that's absolutely fine, if it's great for you and the people you meet.

Personally I think it's impossible to place a definition on swinging other than to say it's about consensual liaisons with people who have the qualities you're looking for!

We're all different have likes and dislikes, the one harmonising aspect of this lifestyle that I've found most appealing is that people aren't judged for what those preferences are..we can choose politely to accept or decline them, hopefully without any further questions being asked.

As others have said, what the OP has decided to do is a matter for her, my consternation would also be directed at her attempt to involve others in her deception, but if there are people prepared to do that, then it's entirely a matter for them and the OP.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 03/08/09 19:09:40]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i'm too scared to comment...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Should we all now hug? This is sort of like group therapy. Once all the issues are out in the open, the time for healing can begin.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

why not try the unwritten law for swinging couples.........honesty.. ffs glad i am a single guy sometimes, why do women lie and decieve better without a consience

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Im not scared but im just wandering how the OP is getting on? For someone sitting on the fence she didnt half meet a nice bit of totty !lol.

As for the 'swinger or not swinger ' debate. Im a single female who has made some brilliant freinds of the single fella variety. Maybe its not swinging, maybe its just great sex... but whatever it is it feels sooooo damn good!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

ermmmmmmmm where is the honesty you swinging couples like to shout about

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By *andKCouple
over a year ago

Norfolk

"Sits back and waits with interest!

Has the debate been as exciting as you expected? pmsl

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

oppsssssssss i hope i aint upset a tree hugger lol....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"ermmmmmmmm where is the honesty you swinging couples like to shout about"

I think the OP was a cheating single, not a swinging 'couple'

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By *leasureDomeMan
over a year ago

all over the place

Some people hold the sanctity of marriage dear to there heart and some do not .

Its a life choice, the marriage of convenience has existed for hundreds of years with both partners straying outside of the marriage without the knowledge of the other (so many examples).

Not ideal for sure but not crime of the century given everyone has a story to tell as to why.

Sometimes its very necessary,for either of the individuals involved and many times can help the marriage survive a certain problem point.

Many advocate that the marriage "Contract" is just that a contract something you can revisit as often as you like to reaffirm or tear up and something you think about only when there is a problem.

Monogamy is not a natural state for humans,if it were the population of the planet and development of the human race would not be what it is now.

So we all have different morals and feelings about marriage , people have said on here we all change and move on.

Some couples in strong relationships and marriages go to clubs and meet people they know nothing about,single or partnered cheaters and then it appears ok ...as long as you dont think about it ..cus lets face it in a club how can you know the legitimate from the cheaters...

If your feelings are that core and important for a contract enforced from the 17th century that of course is your right to do so and i respect it.

However wouldnt it help if you didnt do clubs or perhaps insist on marriage certificates and wedding photos albums to prove legitimacy before any meet.?

Just because you align your self behind the "Its always wrong camp" stating your allegiance to that position on such a forum as this, doesn't mean your exempt from responsibility of going and meeting the very people and situations your so against.

In my opinion your simply, at best turning a blind eye and if your a clubber it seems to smack of hypocrisy.

love and peace x

(not meant to disrespect anyone just to state a position )

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By *etillanteWoman
over a year ago

"Some people hold the sanctity of marriage dear to there heart and some do not .