FabSwingers.com forum: Insecurity

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Hi there,

My partner and I are looking for playmates and when it comes down to finding women to potentially join us I'm finding myself feeling rather insecure.

Not in the way that I'm worried my partner will think they are more attractive than me (I'm not naive) but more for the reason that I don't want to feel like an ogre in comparison.

Does anyone else ever feel this way and how do you get over it? (without copious amounts of wine

)

G x

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By *estmidscoupleCouple
over a year ago

West Midlands

I feel like this when we go to clubs but it dissipates once we're there, just a matter of time and confidence I guess

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By *uteguy06Man
over a year ago

Swindon

That's what scares me about going to clubs, being stood next to a guy with a cock twice the size of mine would never help with confidence & nerves which I already have an issue with

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By *awandOrderCouple
over a year ago

SW London

Once you are out there, you will see there are people of all shapes and sizes. To be honest, if you have some insecurities, I think it is better to face them and get them out of your system ...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"That's what scares me about going to clubs, being stood next to a guy with a cock twice the size of mine would never help with confidence & nerves which I already have an issue with"

I feel very insecure in clubs and when in group situations because there are always women much more attractive than me. I still go to clubs though so that I can get over my insecurities...I'm still working on it

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By *igeiaWoman
over a year ago

Bristol

I've always assumed everyone feels the same about themselves so I just get on with appreciating more attractive ladies without worrying I don't measure up. I have my wobbly moments but I'm pretty quick to rationalise them away.

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By *awandOrderCouple
over a year ago

SW London

"I've always assumed everyone feels the same about themselves so I just get on with appreciating more attractive ladies without worrying I don't measure up."

Agreed. I assume they have the same insecurities, or perhaps even more as they feel the need to dress up more (in some cases) whereas stubborn old me, you are going to have to accept me as I am, because that is who I am ...

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By *LCCCouple
over a year ago

Cambridge

OP you are certainly no ogre!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Never felt this , and I don't drink at all

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Thank you for the replies. I actually feel ok in clubs, I just worry when it comes to an actual meet.

Also I never really thought about the fact that they probably have issues too, thank you for that.

I guess I need to work on my self esteem and suck it up in the meantime

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Thank you for the replies. I actually feel ok in clubs, I just worry when it comes to an actual meet.

Also I never really thought about the fact that they probably have issues too, thank you for that.

I guess I need to work on my self esteem and suck it up in the meantime

Sure your partner might feel that way also?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"That's what scares me about going to clubs, being stood next to a guy with a cock twice the size of mine would never help with confidence & nerves which I already have an issue with"

To be honest you not likely to see a guys cock unless in same room playing

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You look beautiful OP

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hi there,

My partner and I are looking for playmates and when it comes down to finding women to potentially join us I'm finding myself feeling rather insecure.

Not in the way that I'm worried my partner will think they are more attractive than me (I'm not naive) but more for the reason that I don't want to feel like an ogre in comparison.

Does anyone else ever feel this way and how do you get over it? (without copious amounts of wine

)

G x"

I'm curious G as to why U fear being perceived as an ogre ? Ur pictures prove U have absolutely no basis for insecurities about Ur beauty or outstandingly attractive figure ( as all honest people on here would gladly testify to). So that leads me to wonder are U self-conscious / insecure about Ur sexual skills / performance in comparison to more experianced ladies in this lifestyle ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hi there,

My partner and I are looking for playmates and when it comes down to finding women to potentially join us I'm finding myself feeling rather insecure.

Not in the way that I'm worried my partner will think they are more attractive than me (I'm not naive) but more for the reason that I don't want to feel like an ogre in comparison.

Does anyone else ever feel this way and how do you get over it? (without copious amounts of wine

)

G x"

I have no partner on here and have insecurity now and again. Currently have it at this moment. I keep telling myself to grow up, its a sex site, no one wants involvement or cares really how you look, fat or thin, its just sex no matter what they say.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You young lady are...fit as fook!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yeah, not trying to blow smoke up your arse but you look sound.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Everyone gets insecure....

I really hate my stomach but I try not to let it stop me having fun

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Everyone gets insecure....

I really hate my stomach but I try not to let it stop me having fun

You're fit as fook too

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I won't meet with anyone I will feel bad next to.

I have my bad days though...and then I know nothing will work

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Hi there,

My partner and I are looking for playmates and when it comes down to finding women to potentially join us I'm finding myself feeling rather insecure.

Not in the way that I'm worried my partner will think they are more attractive than me (I'm not naive) but more for the reason that I don't want to feel like an ogre in comparison.

Does anyone else ever feel this way and how do you get over it? (without copious amounts of wine

)

G x

It's not so much about how I am perceived by others, it's more about how comfortable and confident I feel in myself.

No I dont have any insecurities about my 'skills', I know my strengths and I also know that no-one knows how to please my partner like I do.

In a situation where it's my partner, myself and a stranger in private I guess I just don't want to feel badly about myself and want to try to avoid that because in my partners eyes i am beautiful and i dont want to ruin the experience because of my insecurities

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Wear a blindfold

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I won't meet with anyone I will feel bad next to.

I have my bad days though...and then I know nothing will work

That makes sense, maybe it's something I should do too

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

And thank you to the lovely people who gave the compliments, it's made me feel a little better

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By *igeiaWoman
over a year ago

Bristol

"In a situation where it's my partner, myself and a stranger in private I guess I just don't want to feel badly about myself and want to try to avoid that because in my partners eyes i am beautiful and i dont want to ruin the experience because of my insecurities "

I have played both sides of that situation, being the stranger with a couple and being one of a couple with a stranger. Having done both I am totally aware at how nerve-wracking it can be to be the extra to an established couple so when the shoe is on the other foot and I'm one of the couple my insecurities don't appear since I wouldn't want the other girl to feel uncomfortable. I'm probably not explaining that very well but just imagine if you were her.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I won't meet with anyone I will feel bad next to.

I have my bad days though...and then I know nothing will work

That makes sense, maybe it's something I should do too

I'm quite a simple thing really x even though Mr thinks I'm sexy. I just need to feel I hold my own with other ladies. Funny it bothers me more with couples than single ladies and I'm worst of all with single guys. I'd never approach a guy that I think I'd look bad next too.. And that included Mr when we first met lol

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By *rab74Man
over a year ago

Huntingdon

"Hi there,

My partner and I are looking for playmates and when it comes down to finding women to potentially join us I'm finding myself feeling rather insecure.

Not in the way that I'm worried my partner will think they are more attractive than me (I'm not naive) but more for the reason that I don't want to feel like an ogre in comparison.

Does anyone else ever feel this way and how do you get over it? (without copious amounts of wine

)

G x

Curvy, you look lovely. And you've got a bum that just belongs over a knee. What's up?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Once you are out there, you will see there are people of all shapes and sizes. To be honest, if you have some insecurities, I think it is better to face them and get them out of your system ..."
totally agree average size guy here but experience and stamina my first group meet scared the life out of me but when others had come and gone I was still playing

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hi there,

My partner and I are looking for playmates and when it comes down to finding women to potentially join us I'm finding myself feeling rather insecure.

Not in the way that I'm worried my partner will think they are more attractive than me (I'm not naive) but more for the reason that I don't want to feel like an ogre in comparison.

Does anyone else ever feel this way and how do you get over it? (without copious amounts of wine

)

G x

Curvy, you look lovely. And you've got a bum that just belongs over a knee. What's up?"

Can't say but thank you

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By *rab74Man
over a year ago

Huntingdon

Curvy, you look lovely. And you've got a bum that just belongs over a knee. What's up?

Can't say but thank you

Pleasure, of course.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't have a partner here or home but I think its normal to feel insecurity,I'm always comparing myself to others and have refused meets because of the stunners they have met,thankfully I have been lucky with the men I have met that they make me feel good.....as I do to them in return

......but we are all only human its just a case of trying to overcome those negative feelings and enjoy yourself

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By *elshman52Man
over a year ago

North Wales

I go to clubs occassionally but rarely have the courage to play. As a relative newbie, I hope I can gain confidence and eventually be fully involved.

I have yet to meet anyone outdide a club.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I understand what you mean. We all have confidence issues in some department or another. Just perved your pics and you look gorgeous. Sexiest thing you can wear in the bedroom is confidence so get your lipstick on (or whatever it is that makes U feel sexy) and enjoy it x

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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

Just an observation based on experience of clubs and parties...

1. Beauty (ie attractiveness) is in the eye of the beholder and many of us make the mistake of comparing ourselves with others. One person's insecurity about their hips might well be what another person would really fancy.

2. Imagine a room full of Brad Pitts (or whoever you consider attractive) and Angelina Jolies - would nt it be boring if we all looked the same? I think if we had everybody looking similar the one individual looking different would be attractive - simply because of that difference.

3. Attractiveness is not (just) about looks - in fact for me it is not at all.

Ok I have certain things I find attractive but in the absence of those I have met many people who are completely different to what I would normally find attractive, but I am drawn to them based on their intelligence and personality. No kidding!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I feel like that all the time I want to play with more couples but don't want to feel ugly or fat next too the other women,I love going to the clubs but when it comes to setting meets up I struggle so by reading all the posts alot of women go through it...x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Jesus Christ wished I was as gorgeous as you!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

fs86........ Are you serious you are stunning!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

OP, you are beautiful and sexy. Your body, pretty face and especially your ass, all look great. You are very far from an ogre.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes I ( Mrs ) can feel the same way, but I push it to the back of my mind and enjoy the moment. I think of it this way, we're not just going to be attracted to one person only forever, and just because the Mr finds someone else attractive doesn't mean he has suddenly stopped appreciating my looks, if that makes sense

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