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Think I’m just about done here

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
41 weeks ago

Think I’m just about done here. Pretty certain I will be leaving and not returning, so just wanted to voice my opinion of Fab. After 5 years on and off here, not getting anywhere, giving up, having a break then returning. Changing my profile, changing my photos, changing my approaches to messaging people, being polite & friendly, being respectful, being cheeky, being flirty, being more direct and forward. Contacting locals. Contacting others further away with the aim of myself travelling. Being willing to pay for hotels if no one can accommodate. Asking to meet strictly socially first to build up or to just make friends.

Literally nothing has worked. Each and every attempt has resulted in my messages being read & ignored, read & deleted or in some cases, I’ve been instantly blocked!

Now I don’t expect to have women & couples fighting over me and flooding my inbox. But I did expect to have at least one or two women/couples showing a slight interest. Out of all the members here that I’ve reached out to. If I added it up over the years, I must have sent 100’s & 100’s of messages. With very little response. Those who have responded have politely rejected. Just find it hard to believe that out of the 100’s, if not thousands here, not one person is slightly interested.

This place is 100% based on looks. I’ve tried and tested that. You can have the most detailed, descriptive profile. And you can be the politest most respectful person ever to walk the earth. But if you’re not attractive, then you won’t get anywhere here. Just take a read at others profiles and statuses? Most have such high standards, expectations and demands. And may I add that most women & couples here are in fact, average themselves.

I’m done here. Fab is certainly not Fab. It’s an awful place full of people who think very highly of themselves and overate themselves!

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *arleycplWoman
41 weeks ago

Frodsham

I certainly do not base, whether I reply to a message on looks,

Firstly if it came from someone, male female or couple and they could not accommodate in there home it would be deleted

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *eandmrsjones69Couple
41 weeks ago

Middle England

Have you tried going to socials or a club?

If so how did that go, if not, why not?

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By (user no longer on site)
41 weeks ago


"

And may I add that most women & couples here are in fact, average themselves.

I’m done here. Fab is certainly not Fab. It’s an awful place full of people who think very highly of themselves and overate themselves!"

Just highlighting this bit.

Lock up on the way out then.

Chin chin.

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *aomilatteCouple
41 weeks ago

Midlands

It's definitely not 100% about looks, though of course looks matter. We and many others prefer "average" looks and nice personality to someone stunning who we don't connect with. Most couples and Women on here are indeed average as they're just "normal" people who like swinging. It does seem difficult for guys on here, so many say they don't get replies. Many say they have more success outside of Fab.

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *ondonlad90Man
41 weeks ago

London

Yes I feel you been here a while with little luck but I take a few days break and I personally don’t take it very seriously

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *arkdawsonMan
41 weeks ago

around


"Think I’m just about done here. Pretty certain I will be leaving and not returning, so just wanted to voice my opinion of Fab. After 5 years on and off here, not getting anywhere, giving up, having a break then returning. Changing my profile, changing my photos, changing my approaches to messaging people, being polite & friendly, being respectful, being cheeky, being flirty, being more direct and forward. Contacting locals. Contacting others further away with the aim of myself travelling. Being willing to pay for hotels if no one can accommodate. Asking to meet strictly socially first to build up or to just make friends.

Literally nothing has worked. Each and every attempt has resulted in my messages being read & ignored, read & deleted or in some cases, I’ve been instantly blocked!

Now I don’t expect to have women & couples fighting over me and flooding my inbox. But I did expect to have at least one or two women/couples showing a slight interest. Out of all the members here that I’ve reached out to. If I added it up over the years, I must have sent 100’s & 100’s of messages. With very little response. Those who have responded have politely rejected. Just find it hard to believe that out of the 100’s, if not thousands here, not one person is slightly interested.

This place is 100% based on looks. I’ve tried and tested that. You can have the most detailed, descriptive profile. And you can be the politest most respectful person ever to walk the earth. But if you’re not attractive, then you won’t get anywhere here. Just take a read at others profiles and statuses? Most have such high standards, expectations and demands. And may I add that most women & couples here are in fact, average themselves.

I’m done here. Fab is certainly not Fab. It’s an awful place full of people who think very highly of themselves and overate themselves!"

Next time just delete the app

but wish you the best probably catch you next week back here

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *heekyCharmMan
41 weeks ago

Colne

Sorry to hear you feel this way. Do you use the chat rooms?

Also, like others said, maybe clubs would be a better thing. Sometimes online doesn’t work.

I’ve been on here years and only ever met two couples but they were both lovely and we had a great time.

Don’t give up! This might be the very moment something happens, it usually is when we reach that point!

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
41 weeks ago


"I certainly do not base, whether I reply to a message on looks,

Firstly if it came from someone, male female or couple and they could not accommodate in there home it would be deleted"

So may I ask, why could you not accommodate? Everyone has their reasons and it works both ways

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *wisted999Man
41 weeks ago

North Bucks

I have been told I look like the actor who plays the hound in Game of Thrones mate and do ok. So I don’t think it’s about looks. I don’t even think it’s about profile as I don’t even bother with a write up.

For me it was about messaging the right people initially ensuring the message fitted what they were looking for.

Then building a little network after club meets to get involved outside of them. Reputation as a good decent reliable guy is key.

I get it must be soul destroying sending message after message which is why I don’t bother.

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *nesCouple
41 weeks ago

Milton Keynes, city of dreams

Go to clubs and socials.

Signing up to a swingers site doesn’t guarantee you 🐱

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *iscombobulated1523Couple
41 weeks ago

Worcestershire

As you say you have been here before you should know how difficult it can be for a single male on here

You have been back 5 weeks so it's not like you have been trying for a year to get a meet

Unfortunately your like a single blade of grass in a very big Field

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *arleycplWoman
41 weeks ago

Frodsham


"I certainly do not base, whether I reply to a message on looks,

Firstly if it came from someone, male female or couple and they could not accommodate in there home it would be deleted

So may I ask, why could you not accommodate? Everyone has their reasons and it works both ways"

After you making that comment you obviously never read my profile, I can and do accommodate.

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
41 weeks ago


"I certainly do not base, whether I reply to a message on looks,

Firstly if it came from someone, male female or couple and they could not accommodate in there home it would be deleted

So may I ask, why could you not accommodate? Everyone has their reasons and it works both ways

After you making that comment you obviously never read my profile, I can and do accommodate."

Just starting work so no, I haven’t read your profile just yet. So you can accommodate? So if a guy can’t accommodate, then why would that be an instant delete? Doesn’t make sense to me

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *arleycplWoman
41 weeks ago

Frodsham


"I certainly do not base, whether I reply to a message on looks,

Firstly if it came from someone, male female or couple and they could not accommodate in there home it would be deleted

So may I ask, why could you not accommodate? Everyone has their reasons and it works both ways

After you making that comment you obviously never read my profile, I can and do accommodate.

Just starting work so no, I haven’t read your profile just yet. So you can accommodate? So if a guy can’t accommodate, then why would that be an instant delete? Doesn’t make sense to me "

Then either he has something to hide, ie a wife, or for some reason does not want people to see there go to his house,

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
41 weeks ago


"I certainly do not base, whether I reply to a message on looks,

Firstly if it came from someone, male female or couple and they could not accommodate in there home it would be deleted

So may I ask, why could you not accommodate? Everyone has their reasons and it works both ways

After you making that comment you obviously never read my profile, I can and do accommodate.

Just starting work so no, I haven’t read your profile just yet. So you can accommodate? So if a guy can’t accommodate, then why would that be an instant delete? Doesn’t make sense to me

Then either he has something to hide, ie a wife, or for some reason does not want people to see there go to his house,

"

See, that’s kind of my point here. People are so quick to judge and make assumptions without even asking questions and speaking to someone first. In my case, I can’t accommodate because I house share. I inherited the family home when my dad passed and me and my brother and his partner currently live there. So I feel that it isn’t practical for me to accommodate strangers for sexual activities.

I understand that some people have something to hide but that’s not the case for everyone. And if people had the decency to ask why I can’t accommodate, instead of instantly judging and dismissing, then I would of course explain my current situation and reasoning

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *arleycplWoman
41 weeks ago

Frodsham


"I certainly do not base, whether I reply to a message on looks,

Firstly if it came from someone, male female or couple and they could not accommodate in there home it would be deleted

So may I ask, why could you not accommodate? Everyone has their reasons and it works both ways

After you making that comment you obviously never read my profile, I can and do accommodate.

Just starting work so no, I haven’t read your profile just yet. So you can accommodate? So if a guy can’t accommodate, then why would that be an instant delete? Doesn’t make sense to me

Then either he has something to hide, ie a wife, or for some reason does not want people to see there go to his house,

See, that’s kind of my point here. People are so quick to judge and make assumptions without even asking questions and speaking to someone first. In my case, I can’t accommodate because I house share. I inherited the family home when my dad passed and me and my brother and his partner currently live there. So I feel that it isn’t practical for me to accommodate strangers for sexual activities.

I understand that some people have something to hide but that’s not the case for everyone. And if people had the decency to ask why I can’t accommodate, instead of instantly judging and dismissing, then I would of course explain my current situation and reasoning "

So you hide the reason, why not put it on your profile??

Why would anyone be bothered to ask, your profile is your shop window

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *itter78Couple
41 weeks ago

Spennymoor


"

See, that’s kind of my point here. People are so quick to judge and make assumptions without even asking questions and speaking to someone first. In my case, I can’t accommodate because I house share. I inherited the family home when my dad passed and me and my brother and his partner currently live there. So I feel that it isn’t practical for me to accommodate strangers for

I understand that some people have something to hide but that’s not the case for everyone. And if people had the decency to ask why I can’t accommodate, instead of instantly judging and dismissing, then I would of course explain my current situation and reasoning "

That's part of the problem, isn't it?

As a couple's profile, we get around 60 messages per day most days, many single women get more... I know you say you've changed your profile wording a lot, but we just don't have the time to be curious and 'ask if we want to know more'. Imagine if we asked every man who messaged us to explain the bits of his profile that don't make sense? People get very defensive about it and we just don't have the time to invest...

You aren't unattractive, so that's clearly not the issue here at all.

Your expectations and attitude might be, regardless of how friendly and polite your first message is

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
41 weeks ago


"I certainly do not base, whether I reply to a message on looks,

Firstly if it came from someone, male female or couple and they could not accommodate in there home it would be deleted

So may I ask, why could you not accommodate? Everyone has their reasons and it works both ways

After you making that comment you obviously never read my profile, I can and do accommodate.

Just starting work so no, I haven’t read your profile just yet. So you can accommodate? So if a guy can’t accommodate, then why would that be an instant delete? Doesn’t make sense to me

Then either he has something to hide, ie a wife, or for some reason does not want people to see there go to his house,

See, that’s kind of my point here. People are so quick to judge and make assumptions without even asking questions and speaking to someone first. In my case, I can’t accommodate because I house share. I inherited the family home when my dad passed and me and my brother and his partner currently live there. So I feel that it isn’t practical for me to accommodate strangers for sexual activities.

I understand that some people have something to hide but that’s not the case for everyone. And if people had the decency to ask why I can’t accommodate, instead of instantly judging and dismissing, then I would of course explain my current situation and reasoning

So you hide the reason, why not put it on your profile??

Why would anyone be bothered to ask, your profile is your shop window"

Why should I broadcast my private life to the nation?

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *umagain58Man
41 weeks ago

London


"

And may I add that most women & couples here are in fact, average themselves.

I’m done here. Fab is certainly not Fab. It’s an awful place full of people who think very highly of themselves and overate themselves!

Just highlighting this bit.

Lock up on the way out then.

Chin chin."

Exactly. There are lovely people you can meet on here if build a connection with them. It’s not just about sex. Yes there are some who can be offensive. However the kind people more than make up for that

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *herrybakewellCouple
41 weeks ago

Staffordshire

Madly, attraction is important to people.

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *uliette500Woman
41 weeks ago

Hull


"I certainly do not base, whether I reply to a message on looks,

Firstly if it came from someone, male female or couple and they could not accommodate in there home it would be deleted

So may I ask, why could you not accommodate? Everyone has their reasons and it works both ways

After you making that comment you obviously never read my profile, I can and do accommodate.

Just starting work so no, I haven’t read your profile just yet. So you can accommodate? So if a guy can’t accommodate, then why would that be an instant delete? Doesn’t make sense to me

Then either he has something to hide, ie a wife, or for some reason does not want people to see there go to his house,

See, that’s kind of my point here. People are so quick to judge and make assumptions without even asking questions and speaking to someone first. In my case, I can’t accommodate because I house share. I inherited the family home when my dad passed and me and my brother and his partner currently live there. So I feel that it isn’t practical for me to accommodate strangers for sexual activities.

I understand that some people have something to hide but that’s not the case for everyone. And if people had the decency to ask why I can’t accommodate, instead of instantly judging and dismissing, then I would of course explain my current situation and reasoning

So you hide the reason, why not put it on your profile??

Why would anyone be bothered to ask, your profile is your shop window

Why should I broadcast my private life to the nation? "

You dont need to but if you have nothing to hide a single line saying "cant accomodate as I house share" on your profile would maybe make people think about a reply. Saying you cant accommodate with no reason 90% of the time means married and playing away which puts a lot off. You are restricting yourself by not posting that little bit of info but ots up to you. .

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *ecky and justCouple
41 weeks ago

Godalming


"Think I’m just about done here. Pretty certain I will be leaving and not returning, so just wanted to voice my opinion of Fab. After 5 years on and off here, not getting anywhere, giving up, having a break then returning. Changing my profile, changing my photos, changing my approaches to messaging people, being polite & friendly, being respectful, being cheeky, being flirty, being more direct and forward. Contacting locals. Contacting others further away with the aim of myself travelling. Being willing to pay for hotels if no one can accommodate. Asking to meet strictly socially first to build up or to just make friends.

Literally nothing has worked. Each and every attempt has resulted in my messages being read & ignored, read & deleted or in some cases, I’ve been instantly blocked!

Now I don’t expect to have women & couples fighting over me and flooding my inbox. But I did expect to have at least one or two women/couples showing a slight interest. Out of all the members here that I’ve reached out to. If I added it up over the years, I must have sent 100’s & 100’s of messages. With very little response. Those who have responded have politely rejected. Just find it hard to believe that out of the 100’s, if not thousands here, not one person is slightly interested.

This place is 100% based on looks. I’ve tried and tested that. You can have the most detailed, descriptive profile. And you can be the politest most respectful person ever to walk the earth. But if you’re not attractive, then you won’t get anywhere here. Just take a read at others profiles and statuses? Most have such high standards, expectations and demands. And may I add that most women & couples here are in fact, average themselves.

I’m done here. Fab is certainly not Fab. It’s an awful place full of people who think very highly of themselves and overate themselves!"

No need to announce your departure.

For some, the site works.

From your post here and your profile, I’m sensing a sense of entitlement and bitterness. Both of which are attributes that would make us delete and block.

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *umagain58Man
41 weeks ago

London


"Think I’m just about done here. Pretty certain I will be leaving and not returning, so just wanted to voice my opinion of Fab. After 5 years on and off here, not getting anywhere, giving up, having a break then returning. Changing my profile, changing my photos, changing my approaches to messaging people, being polite & friendly, being respectful, being cheeky, being flirty, being more direct and forward. Contacting locals. Contacting others further away with the aim of myself travelling. Being willing to pay for hotels if no one can accommodate. Asking to meet strictly socially first to build up or to just make friends.

Literally nothing has worked. Each and every attempt has resulted in my messages being read & ignored, read & deleted or in some cases, I’ve been instantly blocked!

Now I don’t expect to have women & couples fighting over me and flooding my inbox. But I did expect to have at least one or two women/couples showing a slight interest. Out of all the members here that I’ve reached out to. If I added it up over the years, I must have sent 100’s & 100’s of messages. With very little response. Those who have responded have politely rejected. Just find it hard to believe that out of the 100’s, if not thousands here, not one person is slightly interested.

This place is 100% based on looks. I’ve tried and tested that. You can have the most detailed, descriptive profile. And you can be the politest most respectful person ever to walk the earth. But if you’re not attractive, then you won’t get anywhere here. Just take a read at others profiles and statuses? Most have such high standards, expectations and demands. And may I add that most women & couples here are in fact, average themselves.

I’m done here. Fab is certainly not Fab. It’s an awful place full of people who think very highly of themselves and overate themselves!

No need to announce your departure.

For some, the site works.

From your post here and your profile, I’m sensing a sense of entitlement and bitterness. Both of which are attributes that would make us delete and block. "

You are getting the reasons op. Learn from them.

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *i versMan
41 weeks ago

Kirkcaldy

Dry your eyes mate....

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *aGaGagging for itCouple
41 weeks ago

Newcastle upon Tyne

So you'd have sex with people that you don't find attractive?

You also criticise that others have standards and preferences that don't conform to yours. You may have the answer to your dilemma, my friend.

It's a numbers game on here. The principles of supply and demand apply. I know a female who joined recently and within 90 minutes had 192 messages. With those numbers, she needs to be selective! The minorities can pick the best of the majorities - that's the deal that you signed up for, even if you didn't appreciate it.

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
41 weeks ago


"

And may I add that most women & couples here are in fact, average themselves.

I’m done here. Fab is certainly not Fab. It’s an awful place full of people who think very highly of themselves and overate themselves!

Just highlighting this bit.

Lock up on the way out then.

Chin chin.

Exactly. There are lovely people you can meet on here if build a connection with them. It’s not just about sex. Yes there are some who can be offensive. However the kind people more than make up for that"

It takes two to build a connection. I’ve tried numerous times. Can’t build a connection if no one will talk to me

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
41 weeks ago


"I certainly do not base, whether I reply to a message on looks,

Firstly if it came from someone, male female or couple and they could not accommodate in there home it would be deleted

So may I ask, why could you not accommodate? Everyone has their reasons and it works both ways

After you making that comment you obviously never read my profile, I can and do accommodate.

Just starting work so no, I haven’t read your profile just yet. So you can accommodate? So if a guy can’t accommodate, then why would that be an instant delete? Doesn’t make sense to me

Then either he has something to hide, ie a wife, or for some reason does not want people to see there go to his house,

See, that’s kind of my point here. People are so quick to judge and make assumptions without even asking questions and speaking to someone first. In my case, I can’t accommodate because I house share. I inherited the family home when my dad passed and me and my brother and his partner currently live there. So I feel that it isn’t practical for me to accommodate strangers for sexual activities.

I understand that some people have something to hide but that’s not the case for everyone. And if people had the decency to ask why I can’t accommodate, instead of instantly judging and dismissing, then I would of course explain my current situation and reasoning

So you hide the reason, why not put it on your profile??

Why would anyone be bothered to ask, your profile is your shop window

Why should I broadcast my private life to the nation?

You dont need to but if you have nothing to hide a single line saying "cant accomodate as I house share" on your profile would maybe make people think about a reply. Saying you cant accommodate with no reason 90% of the time means married and playing away which puts a lot off. You are restricting yourself by not posting that little bit of info but ots up to you. . "

Your wrong. I have actually stated that I can’t accommodate and have given my reasons. Still makes zero difference.

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
41 weeks ago


"I certainly do not base, whether I reply to a message on looks,

Firstly if it came from someone, male female or couple and they could not accommodate in there home it would be deleted

So may I ask, why could you not accommodate? Everyone has their reasons and it works both ways

After you making that comment you obviously never read my profile, I can and do accommodate.

Just starting work so no, I haven’t read your profile just yet. So you can accommodate? So if a guy can’t accommodate, then why would that be an instant delete? Doesn’t make sense to me

Then either he has something to hide, ie a wife, or for some reason does not want people to see there go to his house,

See, that’s kind of my point here. People are so quick to judge and make assumptions without even asking questions and speaking to someone first. In my case, I can’t accommodate because I house share. I inherited the family home when my dad passed and me and my brother and his partner currently live there. So I feel that it isn’t practical for me to accommodate strangers for sexual activities.

I understand that some people have something to hide but that’s not the case for everyone. And if people had the decency to ask why I can’t accommodate, instead of instantly judging and dismissing, then I would of course explain my current situation and reasoning

So you hide the reason, why not put it on your profile??

Why would anyone be bothered to ask, your profile is your shop window

Why should I broadcast my private life to the nation?

You dont need to but if you have nothing to hide a single line saying "cant accomodate as I house share" on your profile would maybe make people think about a reply. Saying you cant accommodate with no reason 90% of the time means married and playing away which puts a lot off. You are restricting yourself by not posting that little bit of info but ots up to you. .

Your wrong. I have actually stated that I can’t accommodate and have given my reasons. Still makes zero difference."

(You’re wrong. I have actually stated that I can’t accommodate and have given my reasons. Still makes zero difference.) on one of my previous profiles that is

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
41 weeks ago


"Dry your eyes mate...."

That’s helpful! It’s idiots like yourself that doesn’t help this place

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
41 weeks ago


"So you'd have sex with people that you don't find attractive?

You also criticise that others have standards and preferences that don't conform to yours. You may have the answer to your dilemma, my friend.

It's a numbers game on here. The principles of supply and demand apply. I know a female who joined recently and within 90 minutes had 192 messages. With those numbers, she needs to be selective! The minorities can pick the best of the majorities - that's the deal that you signed up for, even if you didn't appreciate it."

Of course I completely understand that it comes down to numbers. But if I’m not getting any response at all, despite my efforts, then what’s the point? As mentioned, I’ve never expected to have women/couples fighting over me. But I expected to have at least someone taking a slight interest. But nothing. There’s something wrong somewhere and that’s what I’m struggling to understand. Despite having several different profiles and making different approaches over the years

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By (user no longer on site)
41 weeks ago

Looking rude and entitled OP.

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By *nesCouple
41 weeks ago

Milton Keynes, city of dreams

You are Kenough.

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
41 weeks ago


"Looking rude and entitled OP."

Don’t see how I’m being rude? As for entitled? Don’t you think a lot of people here seem entitled? With a list of demands and expectations on their profile?

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By (user no longer on site)
41 weeks ago


"Looking rude and entitled OP.

Don’t see how I’m being rude? As for entitled? Don’t you think a lot of people here seem entitled? With a list of demands and expectations on their profile?"

You called one poster above an idiot. If you dislike their input ignore and move along.

People can out what they want on their profile and be as picky as they choose. We aren't complaining about not getting meets because people wont meet because I have a beard or bisexual.

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
41 weeks ago


"Looking rude and entitled OP.

Don’t see how I’m being rude? As for entitled? Don’t you think a lot of people here seem entitled? With a list of demands and expectations on their profile?

You called one poster above an idiot. If you dislike their input ignore and move along.

People can out what they want on their profile and be as picky as they choose. We aren't complaining about not getting meets because people wont meet because I have a beard or bisexual."

So if someone is rude, I’m not allowed to give my response and opinion? I’m supposed to just take it? How many women and couples here complain about rude men?

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *r SensualMan
41 weeks ago

London

Oh OP, you’ve not done yourself any favours here whatsoever buddy 🤦🏾‍♂️. But as you’re wishing to leave, we shall bid you a due. Au revouir! 👋🏾

One less man on here = one less bit of competition for us who love this site and everything swinging has to offer 🤭

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By (user no longer on site)
41 weeks ago


"Looking rude and entitled OP.

Don’t see how I’m being rude? As for entitled? Don’t you think a lot of people here seem entitled? With a list of demands and expectations on their profile?

You called one poster above an idiot. If you dislike their input ignore and move along.

People can out what they want on their profile and be as picky as they choose. We aren't complaining about not getting meets because people wont meet because I have a beard or bisexual.

So if someone is rude, I’m not allowed to give my response and opinion? I’m supposed to just take it? How many women and couples here complain about rude men?

"

You can if you like, but being the bigger man and rising above it looks much better on you.

Anyway enjoy your break, you'll no doubt be back.

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
41 weeks ago


"Oh OP, you’ve not done yourself any favours here whatsoever buddy 🤦🏾‍♂️. But as you’re wishing to leave, we shall bid you a due. Au revouir! 👋🏾

One less man on here = one less bit of competition for us who love this site and everything swinging has to offer 🤭"

Couldn’t care less. Just here to voice my opinion on this awful place and entitled people

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By *eandmrsjones69Couple
41 weeks ago

Middle England


"Looking rude and entitled OP.

Don’t see how I’m being rude? As for entitled? Don’t you think a lot of people here seem entitled? With a list of demands and expectations on their profile?"

Oh dear oh dear.

People may have "demands and expectations" on their profile but you're the one on here saying you're going to throw the towel in!

As they say if you're in a hole stop digging.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
41 weeks ago


"Oh OP, you’ve not done yourself any favours here whatsoever buddy 🤦🏾‍♂️. But as you’re wishing to leave, we shall bid you a due. Au revouir! 👋🏾

One less man on here = one less bit of competition for us who love this site and everything swinging has to offer 🤭"

Those who are successful here will never begin to understand what it’s like to be rejected on a daily basis. It’s soul destroying and seriously knocks your confidence and self esteem

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By *umagain58Man
41 weeks ago

London

You are over thinking this OP. People on here have many reasons why they may want to talk to you or not, If they don’t want to they are doing you a favour as it is unlikely you would get on with them. Try and think about in that way. I don’t of course know you and just a perception.

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By *ucka39Man
41 weeks ago

Newcastle

Only advice I can give is

Don't just rely on messages and use more of the site

Use the forums

Cam chat rooms

as a great place to connect with others and always active

Meet section

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By *eri24Woman
41 weeks ago

Bridgend


"So you'd have sex with people that you don't find attractive?

You also criticise that others have standards and preferences that don't conform to yours. You may have the answer to your dilemma, my friend.

It's a numbers game on here. The principles of supply and demand apply. I know a female who joined recently and within 90 minutes had 192 messages. With those numbers, she needs to be selective! The minorities can pick the best of the majorities - that's the deal that you signed up for, even if you didn't appreciate it.

Of course I completely understand that it comes down to numbers. But if I’m not getting any response at all, despite my efforts, then what’s the point? As mentioned, I’ve never expected to have women/couples fighting over me. But I expected to have at least someone taking a slight interest. But nothing. There’s something wrong somewhere and that’s what I’m struggling to understand. Despite having several different profiles and making different approaches over the years"

Have you tried the approach of going to an organised social to speak to people in person?

Not everyone comes across the best online.

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By *eroLondonMan
41 weeks ago

Mayfair


"...Have you tried the approach of going to an organised social to speak to people in person?

Not everyone comes across the best online."

I was going to say the same thing and ask about his approach in attending group socials, but he still hasn't answered this part, despite being asked previously (above).

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By (user no longer on site)
41 weeks ago


"Oh OP, you’ve not done yourself any favours here whatsoever buddy 🤦🏾‍♂️. But as you’re wishing to leave, we shall bid you a due. Au revouir! 👋🏾

One less man on here = one less bit of competition for us who love this site and everything swinging has to offer 🤭

Couldn’t care less. Just here to voice my opinion on this awful place and entitled people "

Wow, what a comment. Good luck OP

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By *ucka39Man
41 weeks ago

Newcastle


"Oh OP, you’ve not done yourself any favours here whatsoever buddy 🤦🏾‍♂️. But as you’re wishing to leave, we shall bid you a due. Au revouir! 👋🏾

One less man on here = one less bit of competition for us who love this site and everything swinging has to offer 🤭

Those who are successful here will never begin to understand what it’s like to be rejected on a daily basis. It’s soul destroying and seriously knocks your confidence and self esteem "

Pal in life it can be a challenge being rejected can be crushing but it's how things are just pick yourself up as it's not failing you just haven't found your circle and don't give up so easily .

Learn to understand being rejected can go both ways

Attend any socials that may be closer to you

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By *iscombobulated1523Couple
41 weeks ago

Worcestershire


"Oh OP, you’ve not done yourself any favours here whatsoever buddy 🤦🏾‍♂️. But as you’re wishing to leave, we shall bid you a due. Au revouir! 👋🏾

One less man on here = one less bit of competition for us who love this site and everything swinging has to offer 🤭

Those who are successful here will never begin to understand what it’s like to be rejected on a daily basis. It’s soul destroying and seriously knocks your confidence and self esteem "

If getting told no thanks affects your self esteem then maybe swinging isn't for you

I can see it from both sides as I've been here as a single male and part of a couple

Your attitude and the way you come across in the forums will certainly put people off of meeting you

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By *ocket and RocketCouple
41 weeks ago

Canterbury


"Oh OP, you’ve not done yourself any favours here whatsoever buddy 🤦🏾‍♂️. But as you’re wishing to leave, we shall bid you a due. Au revouir! 👋🏾

One less man on here = one less bit of competition for us who love this site and everything swinging has to offer 🤭

Those who are successful here will never begin to understand what it’s like to be rejected on a daily basis. It’s soul destroying and seriously knocks your confidence and self esteem "

Genuine advice try changing your pictures they look a bit creepy to be honest

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By *r SensualMan
41 weeks ago

London


"Oh OP, you’ve not done yourself any favours here whatsoever buddy 🤦🏾‍♂️. But as you’re wishing to leave, we shall bid you a due. Au revouir! 👋🏾

One less man on here = one less bit of competition for us who love this site and everything swinging has to offer 🤭

Those who are successful here will never begin to understand what it’s like to be rejected on a daily basis. It’s soul destroying and seriously knocks your confidence and self esteem "

I’ll tell you what fella, I’ve been on this site for the best part of coming up to 6 years. Believe me when I say I know how it feels to have my messages ignored on the occasions I’ve sent them out.

Do I come to the forum to complain about it? No I don’t, why you may ask? Because I’m thick skinned enough to understand I’m not going to be everyone’s cup of tea. Instead I put my game face on, get out there and meet people in real life. And golly gosh, I’ve met some great people and still continue to do so.

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By *ecky and justCouple
41 weeks ago

Godalming

OP, you declined to answer my post earlier but have still persisted with insulting people.

Try and take a step back and think.

If you’ve sent 1000’s of messages and not had a single response then perhaps your approach is wrong. It can’t be the 1000’s of other people that are all wrong.

This is where you’re coming across as entitled.

1000’s of people on fab meet, converse and fuck regularly. They can’t all be wrong.

You’re trying to convince all on this thread that you’re right and we’re all wrong. It can’t happen.

Please, for your own sake, bow out gracefully now.

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By *xposedInTheMaleMan
41 weeks ago

Cambridgeshire

OK, I'll tell you a secret. Most couples don't get a lot of meets from here either. In four years as a couple we had two meets with people we'd met on Fab - all the rest were at clubs or swingers resorts.

The truth is that meeting through here takes a lot of effort and commitment. Far easier when the urge takes you as a couple to just head to a club.

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By *xposedInTheMaleMan
41 weeks ago

Cambridgeshire


"You’re trying to convince all on this thread that you’re right and we’re all wrong. It can’t happen."

To be fair, he might succeed in showing that his attitudes and expectations are different to every other person here.

Which would also explain why he got nowhere.

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By *partacularMan
41 weeks ago

Birmingham

Isn't the reality of online dating that the top 10% most attractive men get 90% of the success? I'm sure there was a study recently that used leaked data to calculate this.

Of course not everyone only cares about looks, but the reality is that the online world is a very superficial place.

It seems that some people have given some great feedback about maybe going to a meetup. I'm sure you'd have more success there in meeting people there.

OP - Don't be disheartened. There are lots of less superficial places to meet people. If you still want to continue on the site I'm sure there's lots of things you could invest in to play the appearance game. Get some better photos taken! Get into the gym. It's in your power to change some of these things, rather than withdrawing into nihilism.

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By *cottish guy 555Man
41 weeks ago

London

I would politely disagree on most of what you say.

I can't declare to be fit and attractive. I'm not the smartest or the wittiest person on here.

I rarely message anyone I haven't spoken to previously but when I do, some respond, some don't. I suffer from low self-esteem and social anxiety but at lifestyle events I seem to be more relaxed and able to interact with people.

Fab is not the answer for meeting people and getting your jollies. It is merely a tool, a window to the lifestyle and a way to get to know people, about events and what and how a section of people like and look for.

As has been posted above, get out to clubs and socials, interact with people. See what happens.

It seems to work for me.

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By *issmorganWoman
41 weeks ago

Calderdale innit


"I certainly do not base, whether I reply to a message on looks,

Firstly if it came from someone, male female or couple and they could not accommodate in there home it would be deleted

So may I ask, why could you not accommodate? Everyone has their reasons and it works both ways

After you making that comment you obviously never read my profile, I can and do accommodate.

Just starting work so no, I haven’t read your profile just yet. So you can accommodate? So if a guy can’t accommodate, then why would that be an instant delete? Doesn’t make sense to me

Then either he has something to hide, ie a wife, or for some reason does not want people to see there go to his house,

See, that’s kind of my point here. People are so quick to judge and make assumptions without even asking questions and speaking to someone first. In my case, I can’t accommodate because I house share. I inherited the family home when my dad passed and me and my brother and his partner currently live there. So I feel that it isn’t practical for me to accommodate strangers for sexual activities.

I understand that some people have something to hide but that’s not the case for everyone. And if people had the decency to ask why I can’t accommodate, instead of instantly judging and dismissing, then I would of course explain my current situation and reasoning

So you hide the reason, why not put it on your profile??

Why would anyone be bothered to ask, your profile is your shop window

Why should I broadcast my private life to the nation?

You dont need to but if you have nothing to hide a single line saying "cant accomodate as I house share" on your profile would maybe make people think about a reply. Saying you cant accommodate with no reason 90% of the time means married and playing away which puts a lot off. You are restricting yourself by not posting that little bit of info but ots up to you. .

Your wrong. I have actually stated that I can’t accommodate and have given my reasons. Still makes zero difference."

But you asked the single woman why she can't accom. She can, but probably wouldn't for a man she didn't know well op.

No woman in their right mind is gonna just invite a random man to their home, too many have stalked people or dropped round when hey feel like fun etc.

Its not about looks op. It's about making yourself and your profile stand out.

Others have just suggested you pop a little line on your bio about your home situation and you've got very defensive about it.

Lots of men who aren't supermodels, do well on fab. They have good bios, attend socials etc.

As for offering to travel a distance , this isn't something i'd be interested in. If its a long way for someone to go for what is just a social first time, it creates a sense of expectation from those who have travelled.

You say people judge, we all judge others. By providing some info upfront, you may be able to limit that. It's your choice of course though.

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By *xposedInTheMaleMan
41 weeks ago

Cambridgeshire


"Fab is not the answer for meeting people and getting your jollies. It is merely a tool, a window to the lifestyle and a way to get to know people, about events and what and how a section of people like and look for. "

Exactly!

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By *oiluvfunMan
41 weeks ago

Birmingham

OP; one of the best things about Fab is that it is completely free of charge to use, ALL of the time! There’s no need to pay for a site supporter pass if you don’t want to, and of all the online contact/swinger sites out there, Fab is the only one a single guy can send, and read messages without ever paying a penny.

Just be patient. Look at it as a cheeky pastime to spice up your day/evening/free time. 😎

The clubs glitterati in here will always promote those as ‘The Answer’……..but don’t be hoodwinked in to that scene. Clubs as a single guy mean planning times/events when single guys are ‘allowed’ entry, gender-biased fees, and ultimately; the experience of ‘Fab under one roof’……😂

Statistically you are more likely to meet more women in your local Wetherspoons, than you will in a swinger club, or a Fab to be fair! Recently I have ‘copped off’ with ladies on a 22 minute train ride home from a beer festival, a halftime break at a gig, and even on a Norwegian fjords cruise…..😁

Fab is a break from ‘normal’ life, and not a replacement for it. Best advice I can give you is; only message those profiles you feel a genuine mutual match with 👍

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By *ed and WolfieCouple
41 weeks ago

Gravesend

Tbh, is your rant a veiled attempt at getting a response? Playing the 'sympathy card'hoping some generous soul decides to jump on you to cheer you up?

Your profile is a touch uninspiring, with no real hooks to get people interested. Your pics are all similar and not very creative, so is it the old story of you get out what you put in?

Anyway, you won't have read this because you hate fab so much you have already left............🤣

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By *uliette500Woman
41 weeks ago

Hull


"Dry your eyes mate....

That’s helpful! It’s idiots like yourself that doesn’t help this place "

Your attitude in some of replies wont be helping you either.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
41 weeks ago


"Tbh, is your rant a veiled attempt at getting a response? Playing the 'sympathy card'hoping some generous soul decides to jump on you to cheer you up?

Your profile is a touch uninspiring, with no real hooks to get people interested. Your pics are all similar and not very creative, so is it the old story of you get out what you put in?

Anyway, you won't have read this because you hate fab so much you have already left............🤣"

Ok. Let’s discuss profiles? You say my profile is uninspiring? So can you please explain how that some members with pretty bland or even blank profiles still successfully get meets? This is backed up by their verifications. So you’re wrong, it’s not all down to what’s written in your profile

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By *iscombobulated1523Couple
41 weeks ago

Worcestershire


"Tbh, is your rant a veiled attempt at getting a response? Playing the 'sympathy card'hoping some generous soul decides to jump on you to cheer you up?

Your profile is a touch uninspiring, with no real hooks to get people interested. Your pics are all similar and not very creative, so is it the old story of you get out what you put in?

Anyway, you won't have read this because you hate fab so much you have already left............🤣

Ok. Let’s discuss profiles? You say my profile is uninspiring? So can you please explain how that some members with pretty bland or even blank profiles still successfully get meets? This is backed up by their verifications. So you’re wrong, it’s not all down to what’s written in your profile "

Are they getting meets or are they going to socials

We totally agree with the uninspiring comment

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By (user no longer on site)
41 weeks ago


"Tbh, is your rant a veiled attempt at getting a response? Playing the 'sympathy card'hoping some generous soul decides to jump on you to cheer you up?

Your profile is a touch uninspiring, with no real hooks to get people interested. Your pics are all similar and not very creative, so is it the old story of you get out what you put in?

Anyway, you won't have read this because you hate fab so much you have already left............🤣

Ok. Let’s discuss profiles? You say my profile is uninspiring? So can you please explain how that some members with pretty bland or even blank profiles still successfully get meets? This is backed up by their verifications. So you’re wrong, it’s not all down to what’s written in your profile "

You're really not doing yourself any favours with these sort of responses.

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By (user no longer on site)
41 weeks ago

he's clearly had enough,

and feeling very rough,

it can be very tough,

could try looking buff,

and handle the bluff,

don't need to scuff,

or give a chuff,

give it a stuff,

or maybe talk some guff

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *arleycplWoman
41 weeks ago

Frodsham


"I certainly do not base, whether I reply to a message on looks,

Firstly if it came from someone, male female or couple and they could not accommodate in there home it would be deleted

So may I ask, why could you not accommodate? Everyone has their reasons and it works both ways

After you making that comment you obviously never read my profile, I can and do accommodate.

Just starting work so no, I haven’t read your profile just yet. So you can accommodate? So if a guy can’t accommodate, then why would that be an instant delete? Doesn’t make sense to me

Then either he has something to hide, ie a wife, or for some reason does not want people to see there go to his house,

See, that’s kind of my point here. People are so quick to judge and make assumptions without even asking questions and speaking to someone first. In my case, I can’t accommodate because I house share. I inherited the family home when my dad passed and me and my brother and his partner currently live there. So I feel that it isn’t practical for me to accommodate strangers for sexual activities.

I understand that some people have something to hide but that’s not the case for everyone. And if people had the decency to ask why I can’t accommodate, instead of instantly judging and dismissing, then I would of course explain my current situation and reasoning

So you hide the reason, why not put it on your profile??

Why would anyone be bothered to ask, your profile is your shop window

Why should I broadcast my private life to the nation? "

So posting your photos on a swingers Web site is not broadcasting to the nation?

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By *eus n EuropaCouple
41 weeks ago

Norwich

Yet your still here replying quite rudely to every comment possible

Not wanting to take or accept any constructive criticism

Patience is the name of the game, what were you hoping to achieve on the site

A quick leg over or entering the world of swinging as they are two entirely different scenes

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By *eandmrsjones69Couple
41 weeks ago

Middle England


"Ok. Let’s discuss profiles? You say my profile is uninspiring? So can you please explain how that some members with pretty bland or even blank profiles still successfully get meets? This is backed up by their verifications. So you’re wrong, it’s not all down to what’s written in your profile "

It's unlikely that a blank profile gets responses in themselves. Who would just message a blank profile and say, "yes, fuck me please"; it just doesn't happen.

Bland... well that's subjective but most will agree an engaging, interesting or even intriguing profile is more likely to get a response.

And we mentioned right from the get go; have you been to a club/or social?

Profiles and being on Fab is just one dimension of the swinging world.

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By *ekkatransTV/TS
41 weeks ago

Scarborough

Oh dear, we will miss you but good luck. Just remember on this site there’s probably 100 guys to each woman, it’s never going to be easy.

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By *izandpaulCouple
41 weeks ago

merseyside

Think the advice about clubs and socials is good.

FAB as a 121 meeting place is awful. Not saying you can't get 121 meets but you have to do a lot of work to out the dreamers, timewaster and chatters.

Use the functions that highlight group meets and clubs, at least when you arrive at these places you are among people who make an effort to show up. For us, once we got our faces around, doors opened up with all sorts of invites and this seems to be the same for single guys who are good company, can string a sentence together and don't bang on about football, politics or their medical problems all night.

Give a social meet a whirl, if nothing else, it's a nice night in the pub with genuine people.

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod

41 weeks ago

O o O oo


"

Your profile is a touch uninspiring, with no real hooks to get people interested. Your pics are all similar and not very creative, so is it the old story of you get out what you put in?

"

I am assuming you mean to you, not everyone will think like you

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod

41 weeks ago

O o O oo

[Removed by poster at 04/08/25 13:03:12]

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod

41 weeks ago

O o O oo

To the OP , you have every right to post your post if that's how you feel without being ridiculed (were people expect you not to answer back )or having your profile discussed.

Your profile will appeal to someone, we all like different things. Sometimes it is just a game of being patient.

If you are leaving, good luck, if you stick around maybe join in the forum more/ use the chatrooms, go to socials / clubs if you are into them as it may help get yourself known.

God luck whatever you do

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