FabSwingers.com forum: Single men

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Single men are often dismayed at the lack of interest in them,..one possible way to overcome this is to do a good profile.

Your profile is your sexual C.V., because there are so many of you out there, you have to be prepared to sell yourself better than the next guy, no one liners will win you fair maidens.

Think about what you are looking for and write about it, dont just say, `I am after anything`, women will more than likely think you are desperate, tell them what you are looking for slim, BBW, long hair, tall, short.

Tell them what you are willing to do for them, this is not just about you, if you want to meet socialy first, say so, if you dont and want to get right to it, then say that,

Tell people about yourself, your likes, your dislikes how you enjoy sex, what your preferences are, put a little humour into it,.. make a women smile and you might be half way there.

A photo speaks more than words, but you will be suprised how many women are not interested in cock shots,...they know what they look like, most will either want to see your face if you are able to do that, if not, then put some thought into other kind of shots, take a photo in your bathroom mirror, the flash will hide your face, a photo of your back, give people some idea of your general shape, remember your cameras have timers, so use them

Be honest, dont have photos on your profile that are ten years old, word will get around and you will be no-where fast.

...and last but not least, be patient, it will not always happen over night, dont get down hearted, just keep trying

If you find someone who wants to meet, be sure to get there in good time, a no show [without good reason] will do the same as dishonesty

...and good luck

Stuart and Allison

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By *endiexCouple
over a year ago

southend/essex

Well written.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

well said! excellent guys

i would like to add one more thing.

I have recently and still carrying on, had an unpleasurable experience with some guy stalking me, but no concrete evidence to take it any further, he being clever about it.

So now i will not accept pics as proof of identity,and will not show myself to anyone unless i see who is at the other end of comp, so PLEASE single guys get a web cam as most ladies and im sure most couples would like to see before we try.(i do have cam)

Wondering if anyone else agrees with me?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Certain agree, even more so for single women who wish to do the traveling,..you have to be as sure as you possibly can be that you will be safe.

Use any means possible untill you are happy, phone, webcam,... and when you are happy, dont forget to let someone know where you are going...if poss

Stuart and Allison

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

good post, I took the advice and have re-witten my profile as mine was pretty crap admittedly. hopefully I'll have more luck in future lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Good to see that some guys do listen.

;-)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

feel free to read and pass comment lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

very well written ...cant agree more. one problem with sites is that unfortunaltly some guys think we are all on here cuz we are desperate,, and expect us all to just jump inot bed with them ..they cudnt be further from the truthif theres no attraction on my part it aint happening, im sure most ladies agree on this ..... and guys if u do have an interesting profile it makes ALL the difference, getting mail saying "fancy a fuck" doesnt work , just makes u look desperate..

STAY SAFE XX

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yep...i agree but not all are like that there are sum genuine guys out there, who have respect and dont treat you like a piece of meat, and also i know that sum peeps do the 'fuck and go' thingy (each to thier own) where as i prefer to be friends and have that attraction before i take it any further and also i have met sum great male friends through the scene.

Just a shame that theres guys out there that spoil for the genuine ones!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I couldn't agree more with everything that has been posted so far, i've been lucky enough to have had some good experiences on fab, and hope for it to continue. The main thing is for everyone involved to be upfront and honest about what they want in the first place.

That being said, single guys often get the bad rep even before their profiles have been read, mainly because of those that mess it up for the genuine ones. My advice for those not getting as much attention as they would like is, stick with it, and make yourself as approachable on sites like this as you can. Eventually, it will happen.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

To even things up a little, I have seen some flipping awful one liner profiles from single women,...the difference is its likely that they will still get the meetings.

Its all a numbers thing, hundreds of single men in competion, and very few [relativly] single women

S&A

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I generaly go by the rule that one liner profiles from women tend to be fake (not all of them mind), so i don't ever expect a response, i don't expect to see pics either. If i get proved otherwise, then its usually a bonus.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Great post and advice.

Speaking as a single guy on here and having being lucky enough to meet some great people and have fantastic (and repeat) times with some of them I can only agree with whats been said.

Just be yourself when you talk to people and don't try and be something you aren't. It'll go a long way to actually getting somewhere with someone.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Doesn't help when 3/4 of the profile is in caps and just full of rants and ravings about what they don't like..

I just see grumpy people and don't bother to read on.

.xX Jo Xx.

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By *ezebelWoman
over a year ago

North of The Wall - youll need your vest

Im relatively new to the site but agree with all the comments ...particularly the comment above about 'rants'. At that point I just switch off and move on. But fully accept that some of the womens profiles are the worst offenders in this respect.

Another thing thats put me off when I look at a guys profile is 'text speak'...but I guess thats probably a sign of old age lol. By the time Ive translated what they are trying to say Ive lost interest...cu l8r...Jez

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By *eicsCouple
over a year ago

leicester

One thing we would like to add to the posts so far, is that single guys dont read couples profiles or if they do read dont pay any attention to your preferences.We only meet bi-fem couples so why do single guys message us! Our profile states very clearly what we are looking for and what we dont want.

`fabswingers` is better than another site we have used ,where in the chat room we are constantly whispered to by single guys , even tho the room is `couples 4 couples` or the room rules are `no whispering` BUT we do chat to single guys who make the effort to be funny and open or make a comment about our profile , proving they have read it and understand how we swing.

If hell does freeze over and we decide to meet a single guy, the ones that have pestered us in the past have no chance!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Can i just say as a single female and have been for a few years now, that some single guys and some couples do not read profiles, as i get a lot of mail from couples.

Also on that note we get so fed up of sum single guys and couples not reading our profiles hence the 'caps' and 'rants' or go to bloody spec savers.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have the rants in my profile only because an increasing number of people seem to make the same mistake, i.e getting messages from bi guys, etc. It is just to draw attention to that fact, not being grumpy.

Hopefully people who read my profile get the hint, if it puts people off, then i can't do much about that, the moment the rant comes off, i'll be inundated with messages and winks from people i have no interest in meeting or talking to.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

most of my profile is full of rants and caps..... for the reason, i get mail off cpls,bi fems, and guys older than im looking for......aswell as messages of guys who dont meet my criteria , i have preferences in who/wot i like, all the guys ive met read my profile....so reading profiles does work even wen i rant lol, if my profile doesnt suit and i miss out it doesnt matter, cuz u cant miss wot u never had can ya ,

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

We have been on this site for about four months now and can honestly say we have not had any problems with single men or the mail from them..... but you would be surprised how many women and couples mail us who don't read our profile as they would see they are not what we are looking for.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I like what you have written and agree with everything you have said. I for one hates sending winks or one liner messages as it does not say anything about me. Plus there are far more males on here than females and couples, so you ladies and couples are spoilt for choice - lol

A well thought out and very detailed male sorry mail always gets people interested.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

In answer to `I`m the one`

I started to read your profile, but didnt get too far with it because of the rants and especialy the capitals.

I would never tell you how to write your profile, but I think that the rant and the caps are doing you more damage than the problems you write about.

Many people hate capitals simply because they are so hard to read, so you may be missing out on good meetings, because your prospective lover, lost interest and went to the next,... would it not be better to rant without the capitals, and have people able to read it.

Just a suggestion,..you may think differently

S&A

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sugar - can you please have a look at my profile, if you have the time as I would love an honest opinion about it.

Thank You

Ben xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Your profile says you're just looking for women MrNuaghty though your write up says you're into couples as well

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

reply to sugarxspice

i personally dont think the rants and capitals do me any damage at all, apart from a couple of no shows i have always had a meet when ive wanted one. and has always been with a very nice guy. i get a lot of mail from ppl complimenting me on my profile, saying that its made them giggle aswell as admiring my honesty in wot i want. like most single women on here i get loads of mail every day, so upto press its not damaging, i like to have a giggle on here aswell, and i certainly do with the ppl that mail me. lifes a tad to short to be serious, so aswell as meeting some amazing guys i have a laugh.... now im waffling lol

just like my profile hehe

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I agree with the block caps rants. I understand we all have problems with time wasters and pointless replies. But when I start reading a profile and it starts with two paragraphs of rants and warnings about what they don't want it creates a negative feeling about them. Makes them feel like angry negative people and not alot of fun to meet.

My advice to guys: don't forgot a good cock shot! lol not enough of them about, especially on webcam, more willy wamming! we all know the ladies love it.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Mrnaughty.

Profile is much better than most single guys, as said sort the women and couples thing out,..if you are wanting couples, make sure you dont exclude the man, I dont mean sexualy, but dont forget he is there,...they are a couple, talk to both of them

But, the profile is good, just add to it, when and if you think of other things

S&A

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well I thought from the outset that a good profile would be important. I have been complimented on mine a few times as it happens....unfortunately, I am an ugly bastard which does not help really!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Thank You Sugar

I will do exactly that, your advice was very good

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would say be nice and just relax! Don't be pushy as it is not going to work.. Until you are verified you really have to put extra effort into your pics and profile.

I did a wee spell of photography so a couple of tips on how to take a good pic.. Its all in the lighting.. Use strong light from one direction if you want to show something off ..and use soft light if you want to hide something!

Mark x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I understand what your saying, I don't have a cam and if your profile stated your not interested in guys who don't have them I would not contact you. however, I have 46 verifications for real meets, I work at a swingers club, and have a well known guest house catering exclusively to swingers visiting local clubs so I do not feel the need to appear on cam to prove that I am genuine, I say this in the hope that you will see that there can be exceptions to most things in life and take each person on thier merit and not judge them by one bad experience.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Have to agree with you, I started to read the profile to see what people were talking about but I don't want to be SHOUTED at, I do like people to politely state what they are or are not looking for, I don't want to waste my time mailing people who are looking for something I am not, so to know in advance is great, but don't abuse me with statements like "no single males go and play with your willies somewhere else" as I saw in one profile and in another "no fucking single males" I don't know you, you don't know me you have no right to abuse me, politeness costs nothing and the block button works very well for those who deserve it.

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By *ildroseandthestagCouple
over a year ago

liverpool

jed ive just checked your profile out and am i right in thinking thats a dummy in the pictures...

if so are you the guy in the santa suit?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Us single females get more than enuff time wasters and wierdos sending mail, asking for strange requests and even being down right rude.

Woud'nt u start shouting and swearing? And trust me there is a lot! but as said before there are sum gents on here and i have been very lucky enuff to meet them.

I think its goes with out saying that us genuine swingers, have had different experiences with all kinds, especailly myself with being in the scene for over 6years but i aint a hardend swinger by no means.

Its all about having fun when u find what you are looking for, sifting is part of the fun!

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By *evin5050Man
over a year ago

wolverhampton

As a single man myself, I have to agree with most of whats been said in particular trying to inject some humour into my profile. I hate text speak too and its probably just an age thing I suppose. I would like to add something to the debate;

I was contacted this week (wednesday) by a couple who wanted to come to my place this saturday. Normally this would have been fine - but this week (and next by chance!) I have some plans with friends and family. Well, what a hissy fit from the male part of the couple - apparently as a single man I'm not supposed to have a life! I'm supposed to be desperate and waiting for any invitation that comes my way and able to cancel all my plans at the last minute - just for a bit of sex!

Needless to say I would not want to meet these people now as they/he proved to be very selfish and inconsiderate. Wow - I feel better after sharing that - sorry for the rant LOL!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

that goes for quite a lot of ppl....

if i cant meet when the guy wants to i get called a time waster....

i'm far from a time waster.... but i also do have a life and family, so like yrself can't meet at the drop of a hat.

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By *evin5050Man
over a year ago

wolverhampton

Yes im_the_one - I was called "a timewaster like the rest of them" too - and accused of inventing a social life! Still, I feel better for getting it off my chest! Better luck next time - I hope.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Me also..i had a few problems going on in my life at the time and had to cancel a few meets, one guy got really shirty with me and very rude.

So after that i didnt have any contact with him, his loss! And as the other was sympathetic and very pleasant about it, i did meet him.

These things happen somtimes, and cant be helped. Deal with it!

Being like that gets you nowhere.

Yeah have a life beyond swinging!!

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

ssssh... can you stop telling single guys all the do's and dont's please... you are making my job so much harder....

that was a joke by the way... yes they get worse!

my aim originally was just not to write two lines and a cock shot, mine just generally evolved to where it is now...

I realised it is not going to be to everyones taste but I suppose the person that is attracted to it is going to be someone that is on my wavelength

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By *lirty14uMan
over a year ago

Milton Keynes

Well, I am happy for any ladies or couples to view my profile and lob a few honest bricks my way. (I know the pics are a bit naff...)

Flirty

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Was a dig at the timewasters and fakers hun. Im sure guys and couples have stories about there experiences. Just telling about mine.

Sorry if you feel i was giving out do's and dont's but as said to the ones that take the p**s.

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By *icpleCouple
over a year ago

hull

As a couple who seek bi males we feel we have something to add to this thread.

We have tried to be open and honest with the profile to make sure that only those that fit the bill actually respond.

I have to say that this just doesnt seem to work. Whilst the majority have read the profile and dont contact us, there is still a small(ish) minority that constantly bombarded us with emails.

They are usually straight guys who have obviously not read the profile

As a result we find ourselves being so very careful, and always looking for the catch when it comes to guys!

Sadly it is fair to say that the idiots on these sites do make it hard for the genuine ones..

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By *IPEEPSCouple
over a year ago

Birmingham

99.9% of the single males on this site are fantasists. we have been let down four times in two weeks & they dont even have the courtesy to call or text the mobile number we have given them. The time for a name and shame section on here is well overdue!!!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Deffo agree _ipeeps!!!

Oh..i would have some fun there.

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By *itFunGuyMan
over a year ago

Around & about

May I be allowed to agree also? If only to give the people 'Im' looking for more confidence in what it says on my tin (hypothetically).

Of course though, naming and shaming would be open to abuse and would not respect privacy..... so I guess I'll just have to continue plodding along.

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By *adchickCouple
over a year ago

Cyprus

Flirty14u

I've read your profile..... I have to be honest and say that you come across as a complete egomaniac.

This line is also a little bit ambiguous......

"I quite like to entertain a lady while her husband watches... "

Most couples I know want total interaction. If you are into cuckolding couples then say it. There are plenty of couples into that and you may find that may be your niche.

It is a very well written and well thought out profile, however, you 'appear' to be putting yourself above most other single men on here and by that token, you may 'rub' the male of the couple up the wrong way immediately, without even being spoken to.

I am generalising here but as a single male, you are there for the couples enjoyment and amusement........

You are obivously intelligent and articulate, maybe you could just rephrase your profile slightly?

**This is Maddie just giving constructive critisism and reminding you that I am actually giving you a major compliment here by not calling you a feckwit!** hehehehhehehhe

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By *itFunGuyMan
over a year ago

Around & about

Ok Admins .... time to put in a 'Quote' button, I just nearly fell off my chair when I read what I thought was maddies response to me lol

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By *adchickCouple
over a year ago

Cyprus

^^^ give me a moment hun and I'll give you a quick look over as well......

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By *adchickCouple
over a year ago

Cyprus

FitfunGuy

Okkies.........

Very nice profile, well written, well thought out and witty.

However, your discretion and 'cannot accommodate' tag automatically make me (and I know plenty of others that automatically think the same) think that you are married and cheating.

If you are not...... pop something in as to your cannot accommodate status. If you are cheating.... say it, apparently it doesn't matter to a fair few, as it apparently means fewer complications.

Apart from that...... it's fine. In fact, if you weren't so far away, we'd probably meet you (providing you were single)

Maddie

**Maddie the gobshite has a new job in between Uni work....... constructive critisism on profiles....**

Be afraid, be very afraid!

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By *itFunGuyMan
over a year ago

Around & about

Please spare me lol

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By *adchickCouple
over a year ago

Cyprus

Cheeky sod!

Don't listen to anything that SugarXspice tells you.......

I'm a sweetie really!!! and my reputation proceeding me is all bolloks!

hahahhahhahahha

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By *itFunGuyMan
over a year ago

Around & about

Cheques in the post .... the things you'll do to support a Uni education :D

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By *adchickCouple
over a year ago

Cyprus

I know....

Us great unwashed spewdents have to earn our beer money some how!

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By *adchickCouple
over a year ago

Cyprus

Rightho here goes......

FITFUNGUY.....

I know why he can't accommodate and he has a very valid reason......

So....he's genuine and a sweetie! and pushing his luck by calling me buggerlugs in private! hhhhuuummpppffff

*(that will shock a fair few who know me on here)*

Maddie xxxxx

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By *lirty14uMan
over a year ago

Milton Keynes

Quote Maddie "Flirty14u I've read your profile..... I have to be honest and say that you come across as a complete egomaniac."

lol ;o) If I wasn't cocksure, what would I be doing Swinging?

Quote Maddie "This line is also a little bit ambiguous......I quite like to entertain a lady while her husband watches... " Most couples I know want total interaction. If you are into cuckolding couples then say it. There are plenty of couples into that and you may find that may be your niche.

Well, it is listed in my interests.

Quote Maddie "It is a very well written and well thought out profile, however, you 'appear' to be putting yourself above most other single men on here and by that token, you may 'rub' the male of the couple up the wrong way immediately, without even being spoken to.

If I'm even above half the men on here, I'm doing well!

Quote Maddie "I am generalising here but as a single male, you are there for the couples enjoyment and amusement. You are obivously intelligent and articulate, maybe you could just rephrase your profile slightly? This is Maddie just giving constructive critisism and reminding you that I am actually giving you a major compliment here by not calling you a feckwit!"

Compliment accepted. Your profile is pretty good too. A little headstrong, but I can see it is a true reflection! I hope you find all you want and want all you find.

Flirty

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By *arryandlilCouple
over a year ago

scunthorpe

woooohooooo get your profile reviewed here lol and its free. i know some sites that charge for them to help you with your profile.

i know it has already been said on this thread and i have have said it on another but i do feel that as the male half of the cpl that to many men are doing it.

it being not talking to the male half of the cpl this is something that really winds me up. the fact that we are a cpl means when deciding who we will play with we both have to like you.

rant over lol

larry

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Belive it or not a Single guy from Derby joined this site 4 weeks ago and is new to swining Has had 4 meets and has got 3 verifications

So what are all the moaners doing wrong Fab works

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Although I'm quite sure I'm about to get hung, drawn and quartered here...

Would someone please take a peak at mine and let me know what they think?

I've re-written it about 3 times since i've been here... I know not many people like some of the things I like (namely watersports). I used to avoid putting what I was really after on my profile but have decided since that this is a pointless endeavour.

Would be great to hear some views/criticism on it.... so _adchick, do your worst! lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

cock pic does nothing for me when they on profiles..but thats my opinion and my dislike on profiles

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Perfectly understandable if the cock pic is the "only" pic on a guys profile.....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

is my profile ok then single guy here 2

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

no it's dull as ditch water...a powerpoint presentation without the power...bullet points suck

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Personally I consider offering anybody advice concerning their profile a mistake.

People have already mentioned that it is a very individual and personal window into just who THEY are. Highlighting others weaknesses, pointing out arrogance, suggesting toning down the cockiness etc, will in the end only cause mismatches!

We all when in everyday situations use our personal intuition and past experiences when forming an opinion towards others.

In the end if every male, female or couple adjusts/removes possible offensive, demanding, miserable wording, it will simply become impossible knowing who to contact and arrange meetings with.

Simple example:

"Quote, Fspider" - By Fspiders Find posts by Fspiders Couple (MF) 2 weeks ago - Blackburn

Doesn't help when 3/4 of the profile is in caps and just full of rants and ravings about what they don't like..

I just see grumpy people and don't bother to read on. Unquote "

People that have removed from their profile the above capitals and rants, will leave Joanne open to meeting the very people she would rather not!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

unusual_suspect, you ask us to look at your profile, and is it alright?,..to be honest it isnt,..[to our way of thinking].

You do have more than the one liner, you have a few, but apart from saying what your hair colour is and the colour of your eyes, all you have said is weither you can accomodate or not,...much of what you have said is just a repeat of the boxes that you have already ticked elswhere.

Add the that, its all about you,..whats in it for the woman?, she is looking for something that makes you better than the last guy she read about.

Build up your profile into something worth reading, something that will hold her attention,..you need to sell yourself

Just the advice you asked for

S&A

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Sin4all,...I dont agree, I have a thing about profiles I must admit and I would like to see them all looking reasonable.

I agree that they are all individuals, and its also an indicator that a bad profile may mean a bad guy, but on the other hand, it could just as easy be a realy nice guy, who is shy, unsure of himself, or not very good with words.

Offering advice as to what kind of thing to include in a profile, is a lot different to telling him what to write, all advice is, is giving, or trying to give a skeleton to work from,..the flesh on the bones have to come from him alone

S&A

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

just update a wee bit

hope its better now

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Nice post, anyone fancy commenting on my profile, what is good or bad about it,is it too long and boring lol

appreciate the feedback

cheers

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