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Men who have no luck on site

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By *herryblossom_BJ OP   Woman
over a year ago

Oxfordshire/Hampshire

I decline so many messages from men with no verifications on the site. They ask why they have no luck on here but it's the way they talk to me and the content of their profile puts me off. You think the daily help we offer on here is enough but nothing changes what I experienced on a daily basis and years being on here.

What could help change this? Support guidance page for people when they initially sign up?

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *aptain Caveman41Man
over a year ago

Home

Being nice doesn't exactly help either but its not the end of the world I quite enjoy the banter of the forum

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By *alleyDaveMan
over a year ago

Sheffield


"I decline so many messages from men with no verifications on the site. They ask why they have no luck on here but it's the way they talk to me and the content of their profile puts me off. You think the daily help we offer on here is enough but nothing changes what I experienced on a daily basis and years being on here.

What could help change this? Support guidance page for people when they initially sign up?"

I have been a member on here for nearly six months. I only have a verification from a quick cam conversation I had with a local couple, who are no longer on the site. But how do you expect men to get "meet" verifications when people won't meet anyone with no "meet verifications"? It the old catch 22 situation. You can't get a meet verification if people won't meet anyone without meet verifications. It's a vicious circle.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *herryblossom_BJ OP   Woman
over a year ago

Oxfordshire/Hampshire


"Being nice doesn't exactly help either but its not the end of the world I quite enjoy the banter of the forum "

Depends how you define nice. I find alot of profiles contradict themselves. They need to sound nice on their profile as well being nice in messages.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *herryblossom_BJ OP   Woman
over a year ago

Oxfordshire/Hampshire


"I decline so many messages from men with no verifications on the site. They ask why they have no luck on here but it's the way they talk to me and the content of their profile puts me off. You think the daily help we offer on here is enough but nothing changes what I experienced on a daily basis and years being on here.

What could help change this? Support guidance page for people when they initially sign up?

I have been a member on here for nearly six months. I only have a verification from a quick cam conversation I had with a local couple, who are no longer on the site. But how do you expect men to get "meet" verifications when people won't meet anyone with no "meet verifications"? It the old catch 22 situation. You can't get a meet verification if people won't meet anyone without meet verifications. It's a vicious circle. "

Re look at your profile and how you conduct yourself? I know many new profiles with verifications. So it's not impossible

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *herryblossom_BJ OP   Woman
over a year ago

Oxfordshire/Hampshire

I started by doing cam chats or going into fab's chat room to get my initial verifications which in turn gave people reassurance i was real and then got meets.

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By *alleyDaveMan
over a year ago

Sheffield


"I decline so many messages from men with no verifications on the site. They ask why they have no luck on here but it's the way they talk to me and the content of their profile puts me off. You think the daily help we offer on here is enough but nothing changes what I experienced on a daily basis and years being on here.

What could help change this? Support guidance page for people when they initially sign up?

I have been a member on here for nearly six months. I only have a verification from a quick cam conversation I had with a local couple, who are no longer on the site. But how do you expect men to get "meet" verifications when people won't meet anyone with no "meet verifications"? It the old catch 22 situation. You can't get a meet verification if people won't meet anyone without meet verifications. It's a vicious circle.

Re look at your profile and how you conduct yourself? I know many new profiles with verifications. So it's not impossible "

Any feedback on my profile would be greatly appreciated. Thank you

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *herryblossom_BJ OP   Woman
over a year ago

Oxfordshire/Hampshire


"I decline so many messages from men with no verifications on the site. They ask why they have no luck on here but it's the way they talk to me and the content of their profile puts me off. You think the daily help we offer on here is enough but nothing changes what I experienced on a daily basis and years being on here.

What could help change this? Support guidance page for people when they initially sign up?

I have been a member on here for nearly six months. I only have a verification from a quick cam conversation I had with a local couple, who are no longer on the site. But how do you expect men to get "meet" verifications when people won't meet anyone with no "meet verifications"? It the old catch 22 situation. You can't get a meet verification if people won't meet anyone without meet verifications. It's a vicious circle. "

Meet verifications aren't essential as long as they have verifications. I chatted to men who been on here over a year with no verifications and then totally understood why. It's the way they conducted themselves. Their behaviour was off putting and they just seem quite clueless what they were doing.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *aptain Caveman41Man
over a year ago

Home


"Being nice doesn't exactly help either but its not the end of the world I quite enjoy the banter of the forum

Depends how you define nice. I find alot of profiles contradict themselves. They need to sound nice on their profile as well being nice in messages."

what you see is what you get with me

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *ittyandtheboyCouple
over a year ago

Back of the bins.


"I decline so many messages from men with no verifications on the site. They ask why they have no luck on here but it's the way they talk to me and the content of their profile puts me off. You think the daily help we offer on here is enough but nothing changes what I experienced on a daily basis and years being on here.

What could help change this? Support guidance page for people when they initially sign up?"

A guide to setting up a good profile could be good

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *interWarmerMan
over a year ago

Gwent

My profile is good and I write nice, polite initial messages. It quite often leads to nothing....

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *alleyDaveMan
over a year ago

Sheffield


"My profile is good and I write nice, polite initial messages. It quite often leads to nothing...."

I know exactly where you are coming from mate.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *interWarmerMan
over a year ago

Gwent

I have had people compliment me on my profile but I get scant responses. Women claim to love a man in a shirt & tie, again, not much happens.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *eybert77Man
over a year ago

Ramsey

When I first started on here I got my first verification through a social meet after chatting in the chat room, since then it has been going to clubs that has helped me have meets not through sending messages on here.

You can put so much effort into sending well thought out messages and to no avail, so I have concluded that unless I come across a really exceptional profile that I like I won’t use this sight like that.

I’ll stick to using this forum for fun posts and arranging club meets which works for me

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *alleyDaveMan
over a year ago

Sheffield


"When I first started on here I got my first verification through a social meet after chatting in the chat room, since then it has been going to clubs that has helped me have meets not through sending messages on here.

You can put so much effort into sending well thought out messages and to no avail, so I have concluded that unless I come across a really exceptional profile that I like I won’t use this sight like that.

I’ll stick to using this forum for fun posts and arranging club meets which works for me "

With all due respect mate, with the amount of verifications you have, it's easy to sat that.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *assy LassieWoman
over a year ago

Lanarkshire


"I have had people compliment me on my profile but I get scant responses. Women claim to love a man in a shirt & tie, again, not much happens."

Maybe it's the shorts and flip flops

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What one person wants another doesn't there's not 1 size fits all.

I've gave up trying to make a profile that is this or that.

Profile could have best pics best wording for 1 but not for other.

Prefer to concentrate on the people I like and want to meet and try have a good message for first contact ifvtheyvreply great if not then they were never going to be for me.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *interWarmerMan
over a year ago

Gwent

People don't like shorts and flip flops?

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *interWarmerMan
over a year ago

Gwent

[Removed by poster at 14/12/22 04:16:56]

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By *interWarmerMan
over a year ago

Gwent

I have just had a classic...

"Hi, were chatting and you sent me a picture of your bum..."

"Hi, you have no verify"

"I have 4"

"You haven't met anyone"

My verification from Miss starts; I have met this.....

Then blocked, go figure

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *eybert77Man
over a year ago

Ramsey


"When I first started on here I got my first verification through a social meet after chatting in the chat room, since then it has been going to clubs that has helped me have meets not through sending messages on here.

You can put so much effort into sending well thought out messages and to no avail, so I have concluded that unless I come across a really exceptional profile that I like I won’t use this sight like that.

I’ll stick to using this forum for fun posts and arranging club meets which works for me

With all due respect mate, with the amount of verifications you have, it's easy to sat that. "

What I’m trying to say is they haven’t come from sending messages out on the site.

Nearly all have come from meeting couples and singles in person at clubs. It was daunting and really out of my comfort zone at first but has been a fantastic journey.

This should be a fun and enjoyable experience and if you find things aren’t working to get meets then try a different approach. The mountain won’t come to Mohammed so to speak!!

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I decline so many messages from men with no verifications on the site. They ask why they have no luck on here but it's the way they talk to me and the content of their profile puts me off. You think the daily help we offer on here is enough but nothing changes what I experienced on a daily basis and years being on here.

What could help change this? Support guidance page for people when they initially sign up?"

I've sent countless polite nice messages and to be honest I've all but given up I have tried improving my profile to more detail that never worked so tried a short and sweet approach more pics ect and not even views shame as I like the idea of this lifestyle and trying to meet new people

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *rivervaderMan
over a year ago

bolton

Be honest on your profile granted me being honest about being married gets me nowhere but atleast I can still chat in the forums

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple
over a year ago

Leeds

A massive warned sign that flashing up in the screen before you sign up saying “ your expectation will massively outweigh reality”.

The mr

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *agnar1980Man
over a year ago

Poole

Advice about profile would be good, what photos work, what don’t. I’ve been on here a while & only had one meet but I’m not looking to sleep my way through fabs but people don’t believe you when you say it.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *teveanddebsCouple
over a year ago

Norwich

[Removed by poster at 14/12/22 06:15:49]

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By *teveanddebsCouple
over a year ago

Norwich

The problem is it is impossible to write a profile that will appeal to everyone. All the profiles threads on here end the same way with a person trying to please everybody.

What really comes across in a profile is honesty. If you want something long term say so, NSA one offs? Just say so. Honesty always wins out.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *armandwet50Couple
over a year ago

Far far away


"The problem is it is impossible to write a profile that will appeal to everyone. All the profiles threads on here end the same way with a person trying to please everybody.

What really comes across in a profile is honesty. If you want something long term say so, NSA one offs? Just say so. Honesty always wins out."

Well said, to many single guy profiles seem to be trying to please everyone and end up pleasing no-one, be more specific about what you (single guy) likes

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *rOralMan
over a year ago

Dublin


"Be honest on your profile granted me being honest about being married gets me nowhere but atleast I can still chat in the forums"

Not the same but similar to what happens to me. Being honest about using a Wheelchair gets me nowhere.

I’ve been on and off Fab for years now, not a single meet by person.

But it is what it is, I keep trying I guess; in the meantime I enjoy chating in the forums from time to time and of course enjoy perving the pics/vids around so no harm

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"When I first started on here I got my first verification through a social meet after chatting in the chat room, since then it has been going to clubs that has helped me have meets not through sending messages on here.

You can put so much effort into sending well thought out messages and to no avail, so I have concluded that unless I come across a really exceptional profile that I like I won’t use this sight like that.

I’ll stick to using this forum for fun posts and arranging club meets which works for me "

I think you are right there. I'm a really nice guy who's mannerly and polite, but really it gets you nowhere.

I've spent so much time on here constructing the perfect message dozens of times to not even have it read and just deleted. It's very ignorant and it grates with me. If the content of messages and profiles bothers people so much just block them. That's what the block facility is for. I'd love a verification or two, but you cant verify unless you are verified first, and before you do that you have to meet !!!!! I don't do these cam room things my phone isn't up to it. I'm more an old fashioned guy who actually likes to meet people, something that just is ridiculously difficult on this site for no pertinent reason.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *eavenscentitCouple
over a year ago

barnstaple


"When I first started on here I got my first verification through a social meet after chatting in the chat room, since then it has been going to clubs that has helped me have meets not through sending messages on here.

You can put so much effort into sending well thought out messages and to no avail, so I have concluded that unless I come across a really exceptional profile that I like I won’t use this sight like that.

I’ll stick to using this forum for fun posts and arranging club meets which works for me

I think you are right there. I'm a really nice guy who's mannerly and polite, but really it gets you nowhere.

I've spent so much time on here constructing the perfect message dozens of times to not even have it read and just deleted. It's very ignorant and it grates with me. If the content of messages and profiles bothers people so much just block them. That's what the block facility is for. I'd love a verification or two, but you cant verify unless you are verified first, and before you do that you have to meet !!!!! I don't do these cam room things my phone isn't up to it. I'm more an old fashioned guy who actually likes to meet people, something that just is ridiculously difficult on this site for no pertinent reason. "

In an instant I saw why.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *humper.Man
over a year ago

northumberland/scotland


"I decline so many messages from men with no verifications on the site. They ask why they have no luck on here but it's the way they talk to me and the content of their profile puts me off. You think the daily help we offer on here is enough but nothing changes what I experienced on a daily basis and years being on here.

What could help change this? Support guidance page for people when they initially sign up?

I have been a member on here for nearly six months. I only have a verification from a quick cam conversation I had with a local couple, who are no longer on the site. But how do you expect men to get "meet" verifications when people won't meet anyone with no "meet verifications"? It the old catch 22 situation. You can't get a meet verification if people won't meet anyone without meet verifications. It's a vicious circle. "

No, it's not. Go to a social, go to a club, meet people. Make an effort, with profile and life. Nothing is "given". Earn it.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *rFoxAndXenoCouple
over a year ago

Weymouth


"I decline so many messages from men with no verifications on the site. They ask why they have no luck on here but it's the way they talk to me and the content of their profile puts me off. You think the daily help we offer on here is enough but nothing changes what I experienced on a daily basis and years being on here.

What could help change this? Support guidance page for people when they initially sign up?

I have been a member on here for nearly six months. I only have a verification from a quick cam conversation I had with a local couple, who are no longer on the site. But how do you expect men to get "meet" verifications when people won't meet anyone with no "meet verifications"? It the old catch 22 situation. You can't get a meet verification if people won't meet anyone without meet verifications. It's a vicious circle. "

Mr Fox and I met a chap with 0 verifications - it wasn't important to us, his personality and pics were! With single guys it's the last thing we'd worry about to be honest - couples and women yes because they could be fakes x

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *stbury DavenportMan
over a year ago

Nottingham

[Removed by poster at 14/12/22 07:25:37]

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By *herryblossom_BJ OP   Woman
over a year ago

Oxfordshire/Hampshire


"I have had people compliment me on my profile but I get scant responses. Women claim to love a man in a shirt & tie, again, not much happens."

Choosing the wrong women? Or the way you talk to them to give sense they will get a genuine meet? Too many just "flirt" aimless chat with means nothing

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *moothGrooveWoman
over a year ago

Durham

To be fair, there are hundreds if not thousands of posts about 'the perfect profile'. Quite often you can tell if someone's read up on it before constructing theirs. Usually because they contain all the clichés!

I don't want to meet someone who has written a profile purely to get into your bed. I like honest, funny, profiles which reflect some personality.

One of the best icebreaker messages I have ever had which lead to some amazing meets was, 'what's your favourite sweet in a pick and mix?' Sounds silly, but it was so much more refreshing and the usual 'professional male, not looking to shag the site. Your pleasure is everything to me'

For people wanting that green tick (which doesn't magically guarantee anything), get yourself along to social events and don't just sit behind a screen saying you can't get verified. Status's or posts with the old 'woe is me, I can't get a meet because of my no verification status', are a self pitying turn off

My last bit of advice would be (jeez, I'm on a roll this morning!!) just be yourself and not what you think some else wants you to be. Be quirky, be funny, be a geek.... Just be authentically you

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By *ablo minibar123Woman
over a year ago

.


"I decline so many messages from men with no verifications on the site. They ask why they have no luck on here but it's the way they talk to me and the content of their profile puts me off. You think the daily help we offer on here is enough but nothing changes what I experienced on a daily basis and years being on here.

What could help change this? Support guidance page for people when they initially sign up?

I've sent countless polite nice messages and to be honest I've all but given up I have tried improving my profile to more detail that never worked so tried a short and sweet approach more pics ect and not even views shame as I like the idea of this lifestyle and trying to meet new people "

Women often look at profiles in stealth mode so you may be getting 500 views a day and they won't show up

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *herryblossom_BJ OP   Woman
over a year ago

Oxfordshire/Hampshire


"I decline so many messages from men with no verifications on the site. They ask why they have no luck on here but it's the way they talk to me and the content of their profile puts me off. You think the daily help we offer on here is enough but nothing changes what I experienced on a daily basis and years being on here.

What could help change this? Support guidance page for people when they initially sign up?

I have been a member on here for nearly six months. I only have a verification from a quick cam conversation I had with a local couple, who are no longer on the site. But how do you expect men to get "meet" verifications when people won't meet anyone with no "meet verifications"? It the old catch 22 situation. You can't get a meet verification if people won't meet anyone without meet verifications. It's a vicious circle.

I understand why you feel that way, but it isn't. Here's how to get meet verifications:

1. Go to a club.

2. Do not expect sex.

3. Talk to some people like they're actually human beings.

4. Don't be a dick.

5. Don't be a creepy weirdo.

6. Don't be one of The Wanking Dead.

7. When the people you've talked to say goodbye at the end of the night, politely bring up the subject of being on Fab and having verifications.

8. Ask if they'd be willing to verify you, and offer to leave them a verification in return.

9. If they say yes, thank them politely.

10. If they say no, thank them politely anyway It's all part of not being a dick.

This is how I got my first verifications. If someone as socially impaired as I am can manage it, I'm sure you can too.

"

Think these rules should apply to fab too. Especially the first set of 5 rules. So important but very very few men follow them, thinking it doesn't matter when you talk to someone online.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *stbury DavenportMan
over a year ago

Nottingham

I understand why you feel that way, but it isn't. Here's how to get meet verifications:

1. Go to a club.

2. Do not expect sex.

3. Talk to some people like they're actually human beings.

4. Don't be a dick.

5. Don't be a creepy weirdo.

6. Don't be one of The Wanking Dead.

7. When the people you've talked to say goodbye at the end of the night, politely bring up the subject of being on Fab and having verifications.

8. Ask if they'd be willing to verify you, and offer to leave them a verification in return.

9. If they say yes, thank them politely.

10. If they say no, thank them politely anyway. It's all part of not being a dick.

This is how I got my first verifications. If someone as socially impaired as I am can manage it, I'm sure you can too.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *herryblossom_BJ OP   Woman
over a year ago

Oxfordshire/Hampshire


"When I first started on here I got my first verification through a social meet after chatting in the chat room, since then it has been going to clubs that has helped me have meets not through sending messages on here.

You can put so much effort into sending well thought out messages and to no avail, so I have concluded that unless I come across a really exceptional profile that I like I won’t use this sight like that.

I’ll stick to using this forum for fun posts and arranging club meets which works for me

I think you are right there. I'm a really nice guy who's mannerly and polite, but really it gets you nowhere.

I've spent so much time on here constructing the perfect message dozens of times to not even have it read and just deleted. It's very ignorant and it grates with me. If the content of messages and profiles bothers people so much just block them. That's what the block facility is for. I'd love a verification or two, but you cant verify unless you are verified first, and before you do that you have to meet !!!!! I don't do these cam room things my phone isn't up to it. I'm more an old fashioned guy who actually likes to meet people, something that just is ridiculously difficult on this site for no pertinent reason. "

Long essays as an intro isn't necessary. Yes I usually delete them as they obviously tried too hard and come across desperate. Maybe abit more relaxed approach? 1 sentence will do and take it on the chin if they don't reply, rather get aggressive which some men do as a retaliation. Winking is better. If she likes you, she will wink back. Then chat

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yeah let's give all the crappy people tips on how to pretend they are actually decent.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *stbury DavenportMan
over a year ago

Nottingham


"I decline so many messages from men with no verifications on the site. They ask why they have no luck on here but it's the way they talk to me and the content of their profile puts me off. You think the daily help we offer on here is enough but nothing changes what I experienced on a daily basis and years being on here.

What could help change this? Support guidance page for people when they initially sign up?

I have been a member on here for nearly six months. I only have a verification from a quick cam conversation I had with a local couple, who are no longer on the site. But how do you expect men to get "meet" verifications when people won't meet anyone with no "meet verifications"? It the old catch 22 situation. You can't get a meet verification if people won't meet anyone without meet verifications. It's a vicious circle.

I understand why you feel that way, but it isn't. Here's how to get meet verifications:

1. Go to a club.

2. Do not expect sex.

3. Talk to some people like they're actually human beings.

4. Don't be a dick.

5. Don't be a creepy weirdo.

6. Don't be one of The Wanking Dead.

7. When the people you've talked to say goodbye at the end of the night, politely bring up the subject of being on Fab and having verifications.

8. Ask if they'd be willing to verify you, and offer to leave them a verification in return.

9. If they say yes, thank them politely.

10. If they say no, thank them politely anyway It's all part of not being a dick.

This is how I got my first verifications. If someone as socially impaired as I am can manage it, I'm sure you can too.

Think these rules should apply to fab too. Especially the first set of 5 rules. So important but very very few men follow them, thinking it doesn't matter when you talk to someone online. "

In the 22 years I've been an internet user, there have always been people with this weird belief that somehow being online is not "real life". This has persisted even as the internet has become a pervasive part of everyone's day-to-day routines. I feel it demonstrates how people would choose to behave if they knew there would be no immediate social or physical repercussions.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I decline so many messages from men with no verifications on the site. They ask why they have no luck on here but it's the way they talk to me and the content of their profile puts me off. You think the daily help we offer on here is enough but nothing changes what I experienced on a daily basis and years being on here.

What could help change this? Support guidance page for people when they initially sign up?

I have been a member on here for nearly six months. I only have a verification from a quick cam conversation I had with a local couple, who are no longer on the site. But how do you expect men to get "meet" verifications when people won't meet anyone with no "meet verifications"? It the old catch 22 situation. You can't get a meet verification if people won't meet anyone without meet verifications. It's a vicious circle.

I understand why you feel that way, but it isn't. Here's how to get meet verifications:

1. Go to a club.

2. Do not expect sex.

3. Talk to some people like they're actually human beings.

4. Don't be a dick.

5. Don't be a creepy weirdo.

6. Don't be one of The Wanking Dead.

7. When the people you've talked to say goodbye at the end of the night, politely bring up the subject of being on Fab and having verifications.

8. Ask if they'd be willing to verify you, and offer to leave them a verification in return.

9. If they say yes, thank them politely.

10. If they say no, thank them politely anyway It's all part of not being a dick.

This is how I got my first verifications. If someone as socially impaired as I am can manage it, I'm sure you can too.

Think these rules should apply to fab too. Especially the first set of 5 rules. So important but very very few men follow them, thinking it doesn't matter when you talk to someone online. "

And this is why I don't want them to get tips on how to behave. These types can be immediately rejected.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *armandwet50Couple
over a year ago

Far far away


"Yeah let's give all the crappy people tips on how to pretend they are actually decent.

"

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *stbury DavenportMan
over a year ago

Nottingham


"I decline so many messages from men with no verifications on the site. They ask why they have no luck on here but it's the way they talk to me and the content of their profile puts me off. You think the daily help we offer on here is enough but nothing changes what I experienced on a daily basis and years being on here.

What could help change this? Support guidance page for people when they initially sign up?

I have been a member on here for nearly six months. I only have a verification from a quick cam conversation I had with a local couple, who are no longer on the site. But how do you expect men to get "meet" verifications when people won't meet anyone with no "meet verifications"? It the old catch 22 situation. You can't get a meet verification if people won't meet anyone without meet verifications. It's a vicious circle.

I understand why you feel that way, but it isn't. Here's how to get meet verifications:

1. Go to a club.

2. Do not expect sex.

3. Talk to some people like they're actually human beings.

4. Don't be a dick.

5. Don't be a creepy weirdo.

6. Don't be one of The Wanking Dead.

7. When the people you've talked to say goodbye at the end of the night, politely bring up the subject of being on Fab and having verifications.

8. Ask if they'd be willing to verify you, and offer to leave them a verification in return.

9. If they say yes, thank them politely.

10. If they say no, thank them politely anyway It's all part of not being a dick.

This is how I got my first verifications. If someone as socially impaired as I am can manage it, I'm sure you can too.

Think these rules should apply to fab too. Especially the first set of 5 rules. So important but very very few men follow them, thinking it doesn't matter when you talk to someone online.

And this is why I don't want them to get tips on how to behave. These types can be immediately rejected. "

Where does the line lie for not offering support to people who haven't yet learned the social conventions around something they'd like to do?

Is asking for profile advice okay, or is that beyond the pale too?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"People don't like shorts and flip flops?"

You should swap the flip flops for a pair of brightly coloured Crocs, obviously wearing a pair of white socks too..you’ll knock them bandy..!!!

Thank me later

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By *xhib12Man
over a year ago

Blyth

I put a lot of thought into my profile. I was honest about being married and tried to say what I was looking for. I probably have too many cock pics, not everyone likes them but I like to show it off and it's my profile.

I've had messages read and deleted, deleted without being read and a few good conversations from them, some of which have lead to meets.

I have no expectations from the site, I certainly don't expect a meet from every contact. I treat it like meeting people any other way such as in a bar for example, and I talk to them in the same way, although I wouldn't be showing people in a bar nude pics of me, think that may get me thrown out.

Basically I treat people as I would like them to treat me. If it ends up in us having sex, great, if it doesn't then that's fine too. Just enjoy the site, enjoy interacting with people, have fun and don't expect anything.

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By *eybert77Man
over a year ago

Ramsey


"To be fair, there are hundreds if not thousands of posts about 'the perfect profile'. Quite often you can tell if someone's read up on it before constructing theirs. Usually because they contain all the clichés!

I don't want to meet someone who has written a profile purely to get into your bed. I like honest, funny, profiles which reflect some personality.

One of the best icebreaker messages I have ever had which lead to some amazing meets was, 'what's your favourite sweet in a pick and mix?' Sounds silly, but it was so much more refreshing and the usual 'professional male, not looking to shag the site. Your pleasure is everything to me'

For people wanting that green tick (which doesn't magically guarantee anything), get yourself along to social events and don't just sit behind a screen saying you can't get verified. Status's or posts with the old 'woe is me, I can't get a meet because of my no verification status', are a self pitying turn off

My last bit of advice would be (jeez, I'm on a roll this morning!!) just be yourself and not what you think some else wants you to be. Be quirky, be funny, be a geek.... Just be authentically you "

This

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By *adyinred696969Couple
over a year ago

Brecon


"I decline so many messages from men with no verifications on the site. They ask why they have no luck on here but it's the way they talk to me and the content of their profile puts me off. You think the daily help we offer on here is enough but nothing changes what I experienced on a daily basis and years being on here.

What could help change this? Support guidance page for people when they initially sign up?

I have been a member on here for nearly six months. I only have a verification from a quick cam conversation I had with a local couple, who are no longer on the site. But how do you expect men to get "meet" verifications when people won't meet anyone with no "meet verifications"? It the old catch 22 situation. You can't get a meet verification if people won't meet anyone without meet verifications. It's a vicious circle.

Meet verifications aren't essential as long as they have verifications. I chatted to men who been on here over a year with no verifications and then totally understood why. It's the way they conducted themselves. Their behaviour was off putting and they just seem quite clueless what they were doing."

"Meet verifications aren't essential as long as they have verifications"

Disagree...anyone can hold a polite conversation on cam in a chatroom for a few minutes, but meeting "in the flesh" gives you a much better feel for them as a person. Plus, a physical (not necessarily sexual) meet takes time and effort, it's a better indicator that they will probably turn up for a meet.

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By *adyinred696969Couple
over a year ago

Brecon

[Removed by poster at 14/12/22 07:56:29]

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By *adyinred696969Couple
over a year ago

Brecon


"I decline so many messages from men with no verifications on the site. They ask why they have no luck on here but it's the way they talk to me and the content of their profile puts me off. You think the daily help we offer on here is enough but nothing changes what I experienced on a daily basis and years being on here.

What could help change this? Support guidance page for people when they initially sign up?

I have been a member on here for nearly six months. I only have a verification from a quick cam conversation I had with a local couple, who are no longer on the site. But how do you expect men to get "meet" verifications when people won't meet anyone with no "meet verifications"? It the old catch 22 situation. You can't get a meet verification if people won't meet anyone without meet verifications. It's a vicious circle. "

Search the forums for local organised socials, and get your name down....and turn up!

Chat, make friends, dont be creepy, and ask people to verify you.

If there are no socials, consider going to a club, same rules above apply, dont become one of the "wanking dead" following people around the club with your dick in your hand.

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By *riel13Woman
over a year ago

Northampton


"I have just had a classic...

"Hi, were chatting and you sent me a picture of your bum..."

"Hi, you have no verify"

"I have 4"

"You haven't met anyone"

My verification from Miss starts; I have met this.....

Then blocked, go figure"

You didn't take the first hint? Most don't like to say, outright "sorry I am not attracted to you" which is usually why someone isn't interested in you... Being nice isn't enough, the same as being super good looking... It's a whole package deal.

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By *adyinred696969Couple
over a year ago

Brecon


"I decline so many messages from men with no verifications on the site. They ask why they have no luck on here but it's the way they talk to me and the content of their profile puts me off. You think the daily help we offer on here is enough but nothing changes what I experienced on a daily basis and years being on here.

What could help change this? Support guidance page for people when they initially sign up?

A guide to setting up a good profile could be good"

A guide like this would be a bad idea.

Why?

We use peoples profiles, how they put themselves across, what they write, how much effort they put in, as a filter, if the site sort of laid out a generic "how to..." for a profile, then many people would just end up churning out a "cookie cutter" profile....similar in a lot of respects to loads of others, the site would become bland and un-origional.

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By *herryblossom_BJ OP   Woman
over a year ago

Oxfordshire/Hampshire


"I decline so many messages from men with no verifications on the site. They ask why they have no luck on here but it's the way they talk to me and the content of their profile puts me off. You think the daily help we offer on here is enough but nothing changes what I experienced on a daily basis and years being on here.

What could help change this? Support guidance page for people when they initially sign up?

A guide to setting up a good profile could be good

A guide like this would be a bad idea.

Why?

We use peoples profiles, how they put themselves across, what they write, how much effort they put in, as a filter, if the site sort of laid out a generic "how to..." for a profile, then many people would just end up churning out a "cookie cutter" profile....similar in a lot of respects to loads of others, the site would become bland and un-origional."

I think it's more to do with fab etiquette, rather than we all need profiles looking identical. Even with guidance, we would never achieve that as we're all individuals. It's the manners from alot of men astound me when I see my messages in my inbox. I given up reading them when the first 4 words I see is off putting

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By *hilloutMan
over a year ago

All over the place! Northwesr, , Southwest

A sticky thread with some general tips (have a bio, try and sell yourself, have some pictures, be respectful etc) would be useful.

That being said, the argument can be made that these are all common sense approaches that anyone serious about giving fab a good go would adhere to without the need for external advice.

Ultimately there's no real solution for this situation. The ones you describe who complain are likely lazy or have little conscientiousness to understand it all.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Most men on here shoot themselves in the foot within the first few words of the messages they send.

The sense of entitlement from many guys is also appalling.

Add in he lack of effort in profiles and is it any wonder so many get no where on here.

Quite simply put there is a huge volume of men who have no real understanding of swinging and what it is about for many couples. We always say swing is not the golden ticket to sex especially if you are a social inept idiot.

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By *moothGrooveWoman
over a year ago

Durham

Quite often "I don't meet unverified people" usually means, "I'm not interested, and I can't be bothered giving a reason why".

Getting the green tick isn't going to change that

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By *jonesMan
over a year ago

Plymouth


"I decline so many messages from men with no verifications on the site. They ask why they have no luck on here but it's the way they talk to me and the content of their profile puts me off. You think the daily help we offer on here is enough but nothing changes what I experienced on a daily basis and years being on here.

What could help change this? Support guidance page for people when they initially sign up?

I have been a member on here for nearly six months. I only have a verification from a quick cam conversation I had with a local couple, who are no longer on the site. But how do you expect men to get "meet" verifications when people won't meet anyone with no "meet verifications"? It the old catch 22 situation. You can't get a meet verification if people won't meet anyone without meet verifications. It's a vicious circle. "

It's so easy to get verifications , go to a club or an organised social .you'll instantly have some

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By *jonesMan
over a year ago

Plymouth


"I decline so many messages from men with no verifications on the site. They ask why they have no luck on here but it's the way they talk to me and the content of their profile puts me off. You think the daily help we offer on here is enough but nothing changes what I experienced on a daily basis and years being on here.

What could help change this? Support guidance page for people when they initially sign up?"

I would put my filters up and actively seek folk rather than get lots of messages I didn't want

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By *oiluvfunMan
over a year ago

Penrith


"I decline so many messages from men with no verifications on the site. They ask why they have no luck on here but it's the way they talk to me and the content of their profile puts me off. You think the daily help we offer on here is enough but nothing changes what I experienced on a daily basis and years being on here.

What could help change this? Support guidance page for people when they initially sign up?

A guide to setting up a good profile could be good

A guide like this would be a bad idea.

Why?

We use peoples profiles, how they put themselves across, what they write, how much effort they put in, as a filter, if the site sort of laid out a generic "how to..." for a profile, then many people would just end up churning out a "cookie cutter" profile....similar in a lot of respects to loads of others, the site would become bland and un-origional.

I think it's more to do with fab etiquette, rather than we all need profiles looking identical. Even with guidance, we would never achieve that as we're all individuals. It's the manners from alot of men astound me when I see my messages in my inbox. I given up reading them when the first 4 words I see is off putting"

I can completely understand this, as some of the messages I’ve received from guys have stunned me too Not forgetting some that have been shared by lady friends in here, many blokes really don’t do themselves any favours…..

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By *ucka39Man
over a year ago

Newcastle

So many think or don't and just want their first verification thinking it's an easy ride from that point, without putting any effort. So many ask for help some take it on board whereas some don't. some don't either read the FAQ or don't know where it is so even if was a further help and advice page would it also be ignored. I believe is already enough help and advice among the threads which for some still hard work to even look.

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By *iss DevilWoman
over a year ago

Bedford


"When I first started on here I got my first verification through a social meet after chatting in the chat room, since then it has been going to clubs that has helped me have meets not through sending messages on here.

You can put so much effort into sending well thought out messages and to no avail, so I have concluded that unless I come across a really exceptional profile that I like I won’t use this sight like that.

I’ll stick to using this forum for fun posts and arranging club meets which works for me

With all due respect mate, with the amount of verifications you have, it's easy to sat that. "

But did you notice where his veris are from? He made an effort, got himself to some clubs rather than rely on this site only. It's almost impossible to show your personality on here.

Yes, clubs are not for everyone, and they can be expensive, but there are also organised socials, that usually cost nothing to attend?

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By *ohn KanakaMan
over a year ago

Not all that North of North London


"The problem is it is impossible to write a profile that will appeal to everyone. All the profiles threads on here end the same way with a person trying to please everybody.

What really comes across in a profile is honesty. If you want something long term say so, NSA one offs? Just say so. Honesty always wins out.

Well said, to many single guy profiles seem to be trying to please everyone and end up pleasing no-one, be more specific about what you (single guy) likes

"

I've said this for years, write a profile that puts over 90% off but leaves the remainder genuinelu interested is way more beneficial than trying to please anyone and everyone

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By *ohn KanakaMan
over a year ago

Not all that North of North London

People focus too much on what they haven't got. I've not got a six pack and women aren't interested. I'm not hung and women aren't interested. I'm not verified and women aren't interested. It's easier to blame women than look at what you have got and will be attractive to some women.

Similarly some men are oblivious to the fact a well crafted message and profile and decent pics is a massive help but offers no guarantees

You can give as much as advice as you like but if men dint grasp those fundamentals it's a waste of time

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By *aturefun63Man
over a year ago

Belper


"I decline so many messages from men with no verifications on the site. They ask why they have no luck on here but it's the way they talk to me and the content of their profile puts me off. You think the daily help we offer on here is enough but nothing changes what I experienced on a daily basis and years being on here.

What could help change this? Support guidance page for people when they initially sign up?"

What on a profile would make you want to respond to a message

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Nothing in my opinion.

It’s very simple all you need to do is make your profile the best it can be and get involved + manage your expectations.

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By *arolandnigelMan
over a year ago

Huddersfield

i message ladies on here as my wife isnt playing at the moment-they just get deleted or ignored-and i am very polite and respectful.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"So many think or don't and just want their first verification thinking it's an easy ride from that point, without putting any effort. So many ask for help some take it on board whereas some don't. some don't either read the FAQ or don't know where it is so even if was a further help and advice page would it also be ignored. I believe is already enough help and advice among the threads which for some still hard work to even look. "

Totally agree.

And I think a guide would be counterproductive. Crap messages and profiles are a useful filter. If people need to be told that they should message others respectfully or that they should have a profile that shows some effort then are they really people we want to meet?

A guide could lead to a succession of cookie cutter profiles that show no personality and perhaps even increase a sense of entitlement..."I've done A,B & C and still no-one will meet me". Because the one thing that most people don't get is that sometimes it won't matter what you do. You need to be the right person in the right place at the right time. Attraction - in whatever form that takes - is so individual and subjective and is not guaranteed no matter how good your profile or approach

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By *ucka39Man
over a year ago

Newcastle


"i message ladies on here as my wife isnt playing at the moment-they just get deleted or ignored-and i am very polite and respectful."

Being polite and respectful most can but it's not always the icing on the cake people need to find another attractive and don't bother replying or reading if they have viewed the profile. It's getting pretty lazy on here

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I decline so many messages from men with no verifications on the site. They ask why they have no luck on here but it's the way they talk to me and the content of their profile puts me off. You think the daily help we offer on here is enough but nothing changes what I experienced on a daily basis and years being on here.

What could help change this? Support guidance page for people when they initially sign up?"

Maybe give people a chance instead of declining? If they are new then at least give them benefit of the doubt. Sometimes we get labelled incorrectly.

I have been complimented on my manners so I know I treat people right. Oh well.

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By *iss DevilWoman
over a year ago

Bedford


"Because the one thing that most people don't get is that sometimes it won't matter what you do. You need to be the right person in the right place at the right time. Attraction - in whatever form that takes - is so individual and subjective and is not guaranteed no matter how good your profile or approach "

This! Very much so!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"When I first started on here I got my first verification through a social meet after chatting in the chat room, since then it has been going to clubs that has helped me have meets not through sending messages on here.

You can put so much effort into sending well thought out messages and to no avail, so I have concluded that unless I come across a really exceptional profile that I like I won’t use this sight like that.

I’ll stick to using this forum for fun posts and arranging club meets which works for me

With all due respect mate, with the amount of verifications you have, it's easy to sat that.

But did you notice where his veris are from? He made an effort, got himself to some clubs rather than rely on this site only. It's almost impossible to show your personality on here.

Yes, clubs are not for everyone, and they can be expensive, but there are also organised socials, that usually cost nothing to attend? "

Hmmm was thinking that but because I’ve no meet verifications no one will let me attend socials. Another catch 22. It’s like the salesman trying to get his foot in the door, in here it would take your foot clean off.

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By *he LsCouple
over a year ago

East Midlands


"When I first started on here I got my first verification through a social meet after chatting in the chat room, since then it has been going to clubs that has helped me have meets not through sending messages on here.

You can put so much effort into sending well thought out messages and to no avail, so I have concluded that unless I come across a really exceptional profile that I like I won’t use this sight like that.

I’ll stick to using this forum for fun posts and arranging club meets which works for me

With all due respect mate, with the amount of verifications you have, it's easy to sat that.

But did you notice where his veris are from? He made an effort, got himself to some clubs rather than rely on this site only. It's almost impossible to show your personality on here.

Yes, clubs are not for everyone, and they can be expensive, but there are also organised socials, that usually cost nothing to attend?

Hmmm was thinking that but because I’ve no meet verifications no one will let me attend socials. Another catch 22. It’s like the salesman trying to get his foot in the door, in here it would take your foot clean off. "

We have met guys in clubs with no veris, one guy wasn't even on fab. In all cases they had phoned the club directly and spoken to them in order to get on the guest list. So it is possible if you want to do it, but just through fab will be tough.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *ucka39Man
over a year ago

Newcastle


"When I first started on here I got my first verification through a social meet after chatting in the chat room, since then it has been going to clubs that has helped me have meets not through sending messages on here.

You can put so much effort into sending well thought out messages and to no avail, so I have concluded that unless I come across a really exceptional profile that I like I won’t use this sight like that.

I’ll stick to using this forum for fun posts and arranging club meets which works for me

With all due respect mate, with the amount of verifications you have, it's easy to sat that.

But did you notice where his veris are from? He made an effort, got himself to some clubs rather than rely on this site only. It's almost impossible to show your personality on here.

Yes, clubs are not for everyone, and they can be expensive, but there are also organised socials, that usually cost nothing to attend?

Hmmm was thinking that but because I’ve no meet verifications no one will let me attend socials. Another catch 22. It’s like the salesman trying to get his foot in the door, in here it would take your foot clean off. "

Doesn't stop you trying to arrange a social with no expectations. People try and run before they're walking just by what the site is. Socials can be loads of fun without sex

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By *iss DevilWoman
over a year ago

Bedford


"When I first started on here I got my first verification through a social meet after chatting in the chat room, since then it has been going to clubs that has helped me have meets not through sending messages on here.

You can put so much effort into sending well thought out messages and to no avail, so I have concluded that unless I come across a really exceptional profile that I like I won’t use this sight like that.

I’ll stick to using this forum for fun posts and arranging club meets which works for me

With all due respect mate, with the amount of verifications you have, it's easy to sat that.

But did you notice where his veris are from? He made an effort, got himself to some clubs rather than rely on this site only. It's almost impossible to show your personality on here.

Yes, clubs are not for everyone, and they can be expensive, but there are also organised socials, that usually cost nothing to attend?

Hmmm was thinking that but because I’ve no meet verifications no one will let me attend socials. Another catch 22. It’s like the salesman trying to get his foot in the door, in here it would take your foot clean off. "

It's not strictly a Catch 22, just requires more effort. How about going on cam for your first Veri? Many won't treat it the same as meet veri but it's a start. Or organise your own social? It's hard work (I know, I organised one myself, a few years ago) but then you could set your own rules? Or, as others have said, do try the clubs directly- not all require men to have a meet verification.

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By *bi HaiveMan
Forum Mod

over a year ago

Cheeseville, Somerset


"I have had people compliment me on my profile but I get scant responses. Women claim to love a man in a shirt & tie, again, not much happens."

A shirt and tie isn't a magic wand that will create interest.

Yes, people like well written profiles. Yes, people like interesting photos.

But if they're not attracted to you in any way, shape or form it doesn't matter how nice you are, how polite, how well presented. Nobody gets a meet based on niceness.

That's life both online and off.

A

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *iss KinkWoman
over a year ago

North West


"Nothing in my opinion.

It’s very simple all you need to do is make your profile the best it can be and get involved + manage your expectations.

"

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By *d4fun73Man
over a year ago

Shipley


"I decline so many messages from men with no verifications on the site. They ask why they have no luck on here but it's the way they talk to me and the content of their profile puts me off. You think the daily help we offer on here is enough but nothing changes what I experienced on a daily basis and years being on here.

What could help change this? Support guidance page for people when they initially sign up?"

I don't know why you bother helping them there's enough advice on here if they choose to look.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"When I first started on here I got my first verification through a social meet after chatting in the chat room, since then it has been going to clubs that has helped me have meets not through sending messages on here.

You can put so much effort into sending well thought out messages and to no avail, so I have concluded that unless I come across a really exceptional profile that I like I won’t use this sight like that.

I’ll stick to using this forum for fun posts and arranging club meets which works for me

With all due respect mate, with the amount of verifications you have, it's easy to sat that.

But did you notice where his veris are from? He made an effort, got himself to some clubs rather than rely on this site only. It's almost impossible to show your personality on here.

Yes, clubs are not for everyone, and they can be expensive, but there are also organised socials, that usually cost nothing to attend?

Hmmm was thinking that but because I’ve no meet verifications no one will let me attend socials. Another catch 22. It’s like the salesman trying to get his foot in the door, in here it would take your foot clean off.

Doesn't stop you trying to arrange a social with no expectations. People try and run before they're walking just by what the site is. Socials can be loads of fun without sex "

Tried that if you look back on site and no one from here turned up

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"When I first started on here I got my first verification through a social meet after chatting in the chat room, since then it has been going to clubs that has helped me have meets not through sending messages on here.

You can put so much effort into sending well thought out messages and to no avail, so I have concluded that unless I come across a really exceptional profile that I like I won’t use this sight like that.

I’ll stick to using this forum for fun posts and arranging club meets which works for me

With all due respect mate, with the amount of verifications you have, it's easy to sat that.

But did you notice where his veris are from? He made an effort, got himself to some clubs rather than rely on this site only. It's almost impossible to show your personality on here.

Yes, clubs are not for everyone, and they can be expensive, but there are also organised socials, that usually cost nothing to attend?

Hmmm was thinking that but because I’ve no meet verifications no one will let me attend socials. Another catch 22. It’s like the salesman trying to get his foot in the door, in here it would take your foot clean off.

It's not strictly a Catch 22, just requires more effort. How about going on cam for your first Veri? Many won't treat it the same as meet veri but it's a start. Or organise your own social? It's hard work (I know, I organised one myself, a few years ago) but then you could set your own rules? Or, as others have said, do try the clubs directly- not all require men to have a meet verification. "

Tried that and despite saying that she would verify me she didn’t.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *rFoxAndXenoCouple
over a year ago

Weymouth


"I decline so many messages from men with no verifications on the site. They ask why they have no luck on here but it's the way they talk to me and the content of their profile puts me off. You think the daily help we offer on here is enough but nothing changes what I experienced on a daily basis and years being on here.

What could help change this? Support guidance page for people when they initially sign up?

Maybe give people a chance instead of declining? If they are new then at least give them benefit of the doubt. Sometimes we get labelled incorrectly.

I have been complimented on my manners so I know I treat people right. Oh well."

If the way they talk to someone isn't what that person is looking for, they can't expect a meet from that!

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By *onlywishiMan
over a year ago

Newcastle

It’s the old question of how do I get someone to meet?

The thing missing the single guys forget is it isn’t a sex site it’s a swopping site that is used by people trying to find someone they feel that they can have fun with?

So if your not what they are looking for then you can’t force them !!

There are loads of local clubs you can visit to meet people? You may still not find someone who wants what you have to offer but if your polite I’m sure they will leave a veri for you failing that socials are always going on in local areas and can be fun

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By *ustintime69Man
over a year ago

Bristol

Funny old place Fab

I have been on here, off and on, for eight years or so and the one thing I can tell you is that expectations of regular free sex with anyone and everyone is pie in the sky

I can say that despite not going to clubs and being a single man of a certain age I have still met women on here and a couple of those are lifelong friends so it can work but you have to remember that we are all human beings and attracted to different things at different times

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"

The thing missing the single guys forget is it isn’t a sex site it’s a swopping site that is used by people trying to find someone they feel that they can have fun with?

So if your not what they are looking for then you can’t force them !!

"

Spot on here - many guys think sending a message saying want to meet will 'seal the deal'.

The number of times we say 'no thank you' and get a message along the lines of 'why not?' is quite astounding.

The fact guys ask that question clearly shows they don't understand swinging. In the swinging world no thanks means no thanks end of.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *iss pleasuringWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere near

I started a thread a while ago of very similar content. There was plenty of comments for guys to take on board sometimes I just waste my time n efforts

That said I do think in last year things have slightly improved

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *aunchy RaccoonsCouple
over a year ago

Exeter


"I decline so many messages from men with no verifications on the site. They ask why they have no luck on here but it's the way they talk to me and the content of their profile puts me off. You think the daily help we offer on here is enough but nothing changes what I experienced on a daily basis and years being on here.

What could help change this? Support guidance page for people when they initially sign up?

I have been a member on here for nearly six months. I only have a verification from a quick cam conversation I had with a local couple, who are no longer on the site. But how do you expect men to get "meet" verifications when people won't meet anyone with no "meet verifications"? It the old catch 22 situation. You can't get a meet verification if people won't meet anyone without meet verifications. It's a vicious circle. "

The obvious way to get meet verified is by going to a club or social and talking to people.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *edheadsruleCouple
over a year ago

lancashire


"I decline so many messages from men with no verifications on the site. They ask why they have no luck on here but it's the way they talk to me and the content of their profile puts me off. You think the daily help we offer on here is enough but nothing changes what I experienced on a daily basis and years being on here.

What could help change this? Support guidance page for people when they initially sign up?

I have been a member on here for nearly six months. I only have a verification from a quick cam conversation I had with a local couple, who are no longer on the site. But how do you expect men to get "meet" verifications when people won't meet anyone with no "meet verifications"? It the old catch 22 situation. You can't get a meet verification if people won't meet anyone without meet verifications. It's a vicious circle. "

Go to a club, the owners or hosts will then verify you.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *edheadsruleCouple
over a year ago

lancashire


"I decline so many messages from men with no verifications on the site. They ask why they have no luck on here but it's the way they talk to me and the content of their profile puts me off. You think the daily help we offer on here is enough but nothing changes what I experienced on a daily basis and years being on here.

What could help change this? Support guidance page for people when they initially sign up?"

That would mean they would actually have to read, most can't be arsed to read a profile

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By *teveanddebsCouple
over a year ago

Norwich


" It the old catch 22 situation. You can't get a meet verification if people won't meet anyone without meet verifications. It's a vicious circle. "

No it's really not, getting a meet veri is easy, bloody hell blokes even manage it for fake female accounts.

There are also plenty of people that will meet people with none.

It's called making an effort.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *oulou22Woman
over a year ago

Sutton

Why the focus on verifications? It's only someone else's opinion of that one meeting. Plenty of people I've met and had a nice time with and verified as such turned out to be creeps later down the line. Do your own due diligence and trust your gut

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I try and message all guys that message me, but does get too much and like full time job so is hard

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *instonandLadyAstorCouple
over a year ago

Not where we seem to be...


"I decline so many messages from men with no verifications on the site. They ask why they have no luck on here but it's the way they talk to me and the content of their profile puts me off. You think the daily help we offer on here is enough but nothing changes what I experienced on a daily basis and years being on here.

What could help change this? Support guidance page for people when they initially sign up?"

I suspect most of the men you get poor messages from, and have poor profiles, don't ever see the forums, they're a small part of the Fab membership, so the advice threads are wasted on them.

I believe there are tips on profile building, I'm sure I've seen them somewhere.....

Again, if people don't read them, the info is wasted.

Winston

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

After been here years we have come to realise that the various reg flags displayed by many but no all men are vital. It what has kept us safe in our opinion.

Some guys are just decent, genuine, funny and charming but above all else respectful and kind human beings, who embrace and become a valued part of the swinging scene. Those are the guys we want to meet.

A guide to help guys cover up and hide thier red flags is not something we would want to see.

KJ

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"

After been here years we have come to realise that the various reg flags displayed by many but no all men are vital. It what has kept us safe in our opinion.

Some guys are just decent, genuine, funny and charming but above all else respectful and kind human beings, who embrace and become a valued part of the swinging scene. Those are the guys we want to meet.

A guide to help guys cover up and hide thier red flags is not something we would want to see.

KJ"

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Help other guys get laid. No ta I’m a greedy guy

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *lackshadow7Man
over a year ago

Toronto

The VAST majority of site users do not even venture to the forums, so i have no idea why anyone would think “the daily help we offer on here” would move the needle in any sort of way, let alone with single men.

Absence of logic.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


" It the old catch 22 situation. You can't get a meet verification if people won't meet anyone without meet verifications. It's a vicious circle.

No it's really not, getting a meet veri is easy, bloody hell blokes even manage it for fake female accounts.

There are also plenty of people that will meet people with none.

It's called making an effort."

I do make an effort.. I’m a really sociable fella..

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *herryblossom_BJ OP   Woman
over a year ago

Oxfordshire/Hampshire


"The VAST majority of site users do not even venture to the forums, so i have no idea why anyone would think “the daily help we offer on here” would move the needle in any sort of way, let alone with single men.

Absence of logic."

If you read the whole comment I made, i said why don't fab like some dating sites, give more practical tips?

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *teveanddebsCouple
over a year ago

Norwich


".

A guide to help guys cover up and hide thier red flags is not something we would want to see.

KJ"

Absolutely

Like the 'How do you spot a fake?' threads it's just a primer.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *rmrs95Couple
over a year ago

Chester

I must admit I wouldn't like to be a single guy on fab, they get such a bad rap ( because of all the bad ones )

To be honest we are a couple and have found going to clubs is far better for meeting people and getting a veri

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *herryblossom_BJ OP   Woman
over a year ago

Oxfordshire/Hampshire


"The VAST majority of site users do not even venture to the forums, so i have no idea why anyone would think “the daily help we offer on here” would move the needle in any sort of way, let alone with single men.

Absence of logic.

If you read the whole comment I made, i said why don't fab like some dating sites, give more practical tips? "

When people join for the first time. And have mutual winks allows only to write to eachother?

I know you can lead the horse to water but you can't force it to drink. But all I see on a daily basis, men writing asking why they have no luck on fab. I wish I can show them my inbox to let them see just why. Lol

Btw alot more people read forums but never comment. So just don't think only people commenting is the only traffic on forums.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *bi HaiveMan
Forum Mod

over a year ago

Cheeseville, Somerset


"I must admit I wouldn't like to be a single guy on fab, they get such a bad rap ( because of all the bad ones )

To be honest we are a couple and have found going to clubs is far better for meeting people and getting a veri "

I loved my time 'pre-Fox' on here. Never encountered any issues having a single guy profile and certainly never experienced any animosity for having one from anyone - couples or single women.

The claim that all single men are viewed the same is utter bollocks, much like the excuse that the 'bad ones' affect the experience of anyone else. It's no more true that people view all single men as being the same than people thinking the same of all couples or all women.

Everyone is an individual. If you behave like others acting in a negative way people will view you as such. If you don't? Then the actions of others that puts people off actually makes you look better, more attractive to your target audience and boosts your chances of making contact with folk.

Be yourself. That's all anyone needs to do. If being 'you' isn't attractive to someone though then nothing will change that. Harsh maybe, but true.

A

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *herryblossom_BJ OP   Woman
over a year ago

Oxfordshire/Hampshire


".

A guide to help guys cover up and hide thier red flags is not something we would want to see.

KJ

Absolutely

Like the 'How do you spot a fake?' threads it's just a primer."

It's more to do with fab etiquette rather how to create a fab fake profile. Think people missing this point about manners

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *host63Man
over a year ago

Bedfont Feltham


"I decline so many messages from men with no verifications on the site. They ask why they have no luck on here but it's the way they talk to me and the content of their profile puts me off. You think the daily help we offer on here is enough but nothing changes what I experienced on a daily basis and years being on here.

What could help change this? Support guidance page for people when they initially sign up?"

Makes no difference whatsoever what a man writes or put on their profile or messages.

Polite hello how are you and an invitation to talk? You are not trying hard enough.

AN attempt to write complement their pics and profile? Trying too hard.

Show a normal pic of yourself and maybe a slightly rude one [ full body not hardcore? Not rude enough/ not enough on show

Cock pic? Too rude.

A polite detailed written profile? Too much information.

A shirt one inviting people to ask you?

Not detailed enough.

Other things

Too old

Not old enough (really?)

Not ripped enough

Too Ripped

Not Black enough

Not white enough

And various other reasons.

For man on these sites it fosnt matter what you write the sad fact is that women on here are picky and want what they want and can put minimum effort knowing some bloke will answer.

Sad fact is that it is what this lifestyle is.

It is not in men's favour.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *eyeYCouple
over a year ago

Nr Leicester

Bluntly a guide to how to set up an attractive profile and how to behave is something we'd prefer not to see!!

Mr wrote our bio, has been a single guy within the lifestyle before we met and is astounded by the behaviour of some! (Disclaimer not exclusively guy's!)

They can look like Ryan Reynolds and Blake Lively, but if common sense and decency needs to be explained we ain't interested!

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *bi HaiveMan
Forum Mod

over a year ago

Cheeseville, Somerset


"I decline so many messages from men with no verifications on the site. They ask why they have no luck on here but it's the way they talk to me and the content of their profile puts me off. You think the daily help we offer on here is enough but nothing changes what I experienced on a daily basis and years being on here.

What could help change this? Support guidance page for people when they initially sign up?

Makes no difference whatsoever what a man writes or put on their profile or messages.

Polite hello how are you and an invitation to talk? You are not trying hard enough.

AN attempt to write complement their pics and profile? Trying too hard.

Show a normal pic of yourself and maybe a slightly rude one [ full body not hardcore? Not rude enough/ not enough on show

Cock pic? Too rude.

A polite detailed written profile? Too much information.

A shirt one inviting people to ask you?

Not detailed enough.

Other things

Too old

Not old enough (really?)

Not ripped enough

Too Ripped

Not Black enough

Not white enough

And various other reasons.

For man on these sites it fosnt matter what you write the sad fact is that women on here are picky and want what they want and can put minimum effort knowing some bloke will answer.

Sad fact is that it is what this lifestyle is.

It is not in men's favour."

How very dare people be choosy about who they fuck.

This is the negativity I mentioned before. Everything uouve just written screams of an expectation that there'll be someone willing to meet you. The chances are there will be. But the odds are also heavily stacked that many won't, for the exact reasons you state - too old, too young, too tall, too short, wring body type etc.

And every single one of those reasons is 100% valid to the person using it to decide you're not for them.

You've just shown exactly why some people think single men have unrealistic expectations of what Fab can do for them in one post.

If some men are daft enough to contact a woman's profile that has no photos, little text and that has put zero effort into it then more fool them.

A

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *lym4realCouple
over a year ago

plymouth

We used to meet single males so they could get "Verified" and even used to let afew come to our socials for the same reason but after a fair few really bad experiences including some at our socials ?? but the rule of thumb with us now just a cock picture ?? straight block ! a inane or copy/paste message block ! or a message saying they love our proifle then procceed to prove to us they haven't read it block or the 90% of our inbox cock pic with fancy some fun/hey sexy/hey/babe/i'm horny block and we don't doubt there are afew good ones on here and we've met afew but sadly most think it's sex site full of gagging for it horny women so little or no effort needed ?? and Mrs4 is a stranger and so if you wouldn't walk upto her in a bar/pub and say .....

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *instonandLadyAstorCouple
over a year ago

Not where we seem to be...


"I decline so many messages from men with no verifications on the site. They ask why they have no luck on here but it's the way they talk to me and the content of their profile puts me off. You think the daily help we offer on here is enough but nothing changes what I experienced on a daily basis and years being on here.

What could help change this? Support guidance page for people when they initially sign up?

Makes no difference whatsoever what a man writes or put on their profile or messages.

Polite hello how are you and an invitation to talk? You are not trying hard enough.

AN attempt to write complement their pics and profile? Trying too hard.

Show a normal pic of yourself and maybe a slightly rude one [ full body not hardcore? Not rude enough/ not enough on show

Cock pic? Too rude.

A polite detailed written profile? Too much information.

A shirt one inviting people to ask you?

Not detailed enough.

Other things

Too old

Not old enough (really?)

Not ripped enough

Too Ripped

Not Black enough

Not white enough

And various other reasons.

For man on these sites it fosnt matter what you write the sad fact is that women on here are picky and want what they want and can put minimum effort knowing some bloke will answer.

Sad fact is that it is what this lifestyle is.

It is not in men's favour.

How very dare people be choosy about who they fuck.

This is the negativity I mentioned before. Everything uouve just written screams of an expectation that there'll be someone willing to meet you. The chances are there will be. But the odds are also heavily stacked that many won't, for the exact reasons you state - too old, too young, too tall, too short, wring body type etc.

And every single one of those reasons is 100% valid to the person using it to decide you're not for them.

You've just shown exactly why some people think single men have unrealistic expectations of what Fab can do for them in one post.

If some men are daft enough to contact a woman's profile that has no photos, little text and that has put zero effort into it then more fool them.

A

"

When (some) people are new here I suspect they have an expectation.

It's a sex site, full of desperate, cock starved women, gagging for cock. Ergo, they don't need to try too hard and they believe their profile is good enough and the women will literally fall onto their cock.

I saw an advice thread a while back, guy claimed he'd put loads of thought and effort into his biog.

Basically three lines that pretty much said "I want to get my dick wet" and 50 pictures of aforementioned dick.

He seemed genuinely surprised that it actually wasn't enough thought or effort.

Winston

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *un-n-frolicsMan
over a year ago

London

With both a couple's profile and (so far unsuccessful) single guy profile, I thought I'd throw in a few thoughts.

With many guys' profiles it's obvious why they don't or do get meets. But others seem to follow the advice and still don't get; others seem to have nothing gone for them (looks, classy photos, great writing) and do get. I think there has to be some far more nuanced distinction that the cliched advice one sees doesn't quite explain.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *ucka39Man
over a year ago

Newcastle


"When I first started on here I got my first verification through a social meet after chatting in the chat room, since then it has been going to clubs that has helped me have meets not through sending messages on here.

You can put so much effort into sending well thought out messages and to no avail, so I have concluded that unless I come across a really exceptional profile that I like I won’t use this sight like that.

I’ll stick to using this forum for fun posts and arranging club meets which works for me

With all due respect mate, with the amount of verifications you have, it's easy to sat that.

But did you notice where his veris are from? He made an effort, got himself to some clubs rather than rely on this site only. It's almost impossible to show your personality on here.

Yes, clubs are not for everyone, and they can be expensive, but there are also organised socials, that usually cost nothing to attend?

Hmmm was thinking that but because I’ve no meet verifications no one will let me attend socials. Another catch 22. It’s like the salesman trying to get his foot in the door, in here it would take your foot clean off.

Doesn't stop you trying to arrange a social with no expectations. People try and run before they're walking just by what the site is. Socials can be loads of fun without sex

Tried that if you look back on site and no one from here turned up"

Awe but it could've been just at the wrong time, keep trying it's effort not everyone may have seen it as not everyone can be online with work family life and other things

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *jonesMan
over a year ago

Plymouth

There are an enormous number of guys on here , so numbers will dictate you get more online weirdos , in real life at clubs and socials i would say it's balanced , most single guys have to make an effort be sociable etc ...comparing a single guys allowed night at chams with a non single guys night , it's more lively , people chat and engage and there is far less expectation as compared with the male half of couples who seem to think the rules are more relaxed as they are in a couple ,not least their relative inability to engage socially.

Going to clubs as a couple is hard work ,if your looking for an attractive engaging male half of a couple ... In general we found...

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *lackshadow7Man
over a year ago

Toronto


"The VAST majority of site users do not even venture to the forums, so i have no idea why anyone would think “the daily help we offer on here” would move the needle in any sort of way, let alone with single men.

Absence of logic.

If you read the whole comment I made, i said why don't fab like some dating sites, give more practical tips?

When people join for the first time. And have mutual winks allows only to write to eachother?

I know you can lead the horse to water but you can't force it to drink. But all I see on a daily basis, men writing asking why they have no luck on fab. I wish I can show them my inbox to let them see just why. Lol

Btw alot more people read forums but never comment. So just don't think only people commenting is the only traffic on forums. "

I’m well aware of the number disparity. The fact remains that the vast majority of site users (and by extension, single men) do not even click through to the forums, regardless of if they simply lurk, or comment.

You coukd make all the guides or practical tips you want. Certain groups will simply not use them.

A lot of how people navigate swinging is through learning by experience, and word of mouth.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *host63Man
over a year ago

Bedfont Feltham


"I started by doing cam chats or going into fab's chat room to get my initial verifications which in turn gave people reassurance i was real and then got meets. "

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *stbury DavenportMan
over a year ago

Nottingham


"With both a couple's profile and (so far unsuccessful) single guy profile, I thought I'd throw in a few thoughts.

With many guys' profiles it's obvious why they don't or do get meets. But others seem to follow the advice and still don't get; others seem to have nothing gone for them (looks, classy photos, great writing) and do get. I think there has to be some far more nuanced distinction that the cliched advice one sees doesn't quite explain. "

I suspect there's an element of whether or not your message even gets seen. You can write like Shakespeare and look like Adonis, but if your message is buried under five hundred "FAF?" one-liners, the recipient will never even see it exists.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *lackshadow7Man
over a year ago

Toronto


"With both a couple's profile and (so far unsuccessful) single guy profile, I thought I'd throw in a few thoughts.

With many guys' profiles it's obvious why they don't or do get meets. But others seem to follow the advice and still don't get; others seem to have nothing gone for them (looks, classy photos, great writing) and do get. I think there has to be some far more nuanced distinction that the cliched advice one sees doesn't quite explain.

I suspect there's an element of whether or not your message even gets seen. You can write like Shakespeare and look like Adonis, but if your message is buried under five hundred "FAF?" one-liners, the recipient will never even see it exists. "

Some of it is definitely “right place, right time”

That said, there are things people can do to mitigate that somewhat, and tip odds slightly in their favor.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"When I first started on here I got my first verification through a social meet after chatting in the chat room, since then it has been going to clubs that has helped me have meets not through sending messages on here.

You can put so much effort into sending well thought out messages and to no avail, so I have concluded that unless I come across a really exceptional profile that I like I won’t use this sight like that.

I’ll stick to using this forum for fun posts and arranging club meets which works for me

With all due respect mate, with the amount of verifications you have, it's easy to sat that. "

Verifications aren't the be all and end all and they probably don't make it that much easier to get meets, it's the effort you put in to it all that makes all the difference, and not just the effort you put into your profile, you have to give 100% to the messages you send, your profile, your pictures and also the effort reading through peoples profiles to make sure they might actually be a match, then when you do get a reply you have to continue putting effort in making sure you can keep the conversation flowing in the right direction,

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Its the same as its always been

I think you'll find the neighbours watch you here more without you knowing &

Quite badly dangerously thats the way its always been, 1-2 pairs or trios rotating watching shitting you off.

Normally find they work for IBM or been HMP majesties services

Its always the talk to avoid in the clubs

Pretty disgusting for genuine relationships (that dont need criminal activity)

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Being proven

I had 5 lined up same day

Birmingham

Got there Only 3 still online, 2-3 hours All Cancelled

Ended Driving home & Paying elsewhere

You know the Model, yourself

Ended up doing Dogging that year twice so shit around my area for a decent hookup

Absolute terror to stay out the way these perverts

I could build your home

Where are they

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *eyeYCouple
over a year ago

Nr Leicester


"I decline so many messages from men with no verifications on the site. They ask why they have no luck on here but it's the way they talk to me and the content of their profile puts me off. You think the daily help we offer on here is enough but nothing changes what I experienced on a daily basis and years being on here.

What could help change this? Support guidance page for people when they initially sign up?

Makes no difference whatsoever what a man writes or put on their profile or messages.

Polite hello how are you and an invitation to talk? You are not trying hard enough.

AN attempt to write complement their pics and profile? Trying too hard.

Show a normal pic of yourself and maybe a slightly rude one [ full body not hardcore? Not rude enough/ not enough on show

Cock pic? Too rude.

A polite detailed written profile? Too much information.

A shirt one inviting people to ask you?

Not detailed enough.

Other things

Too old

Not old enough (really?)

Not ripped enough

Too Ripped

Not Black enough

Not white enough

And various other reasons.

For man on these sites it fosnt matter what you write the sad fact is that women on here are picky and want what they want and can put minimum effort knowing some bloke will answer.

Sad fact is that it is what this lifestyle is.

It is not in men's favour.

How very dare people be choosy about who they fuck.

This is the negativity I mentioned before. Everything uouve just written screams of an expectation that there'll be someone willing to meet you. The chances are there will be. But the odds are also heavily stacked that many won't, for the exact reasons you state - too old, too young, too tall, too short, wring body type etc.

And every single one of those reasons is 100% valid to the person using it to decide you're not for them.

You've just shown exactly why some people think single men have unrealistic expectations of what Fab can do for them in one post.

If some men are daft enough to contact a woman's profile that has no photos, little text and that has put zero effort into it then more fool them.

A

"

Yeah that!!! Self centred egotistical sod's!! We're on here so must be willing to fuck anyone.. NOT!!!

Ironically D is sometimes more fussy than I!!

I quote the last response on me asking yes or no.. "Why would I want to fuck her, when I have you!?!?"

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I meet at swingers clubs mainly that way you can avoid keyboard worries , dreamers and outright cat fish.

I use fab for keeping in touch or seeing what's on.

I have met people via fab but I feel safer meeting at clubs ..

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By *ornucopiaMan
over a year ago

Bexley


"I have had people compliment me on my profile but I get scant responses. Women claim to love a man in a shirt & tie, again, not much happens."

Depends on which knot you tie it with!

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By *yreGuy99Man
over a year ago

Somewhere in Moria

Yes advice would be good. I can admit that this site is just making me depressed. Being invisible all of the time really gets to you.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


".

A guide to help guys cover up and hide thier red flags is not something we would want to see.

KJ

Absolutely

Like the 'How do you spot a fake?' threads it's just a primer.

It's more to do with fab etiquette rather how to create a fab fake profile. Think people missing this point about manners"

I'm sorry but if you have to teach and or advise people to use manners than that's trying to cover up or hide a serious red flag.

We will much rather meet those guys who are respectful and have good manners because it's a fundamental part of who they are.

KJ

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By *ablo minibar123Woman
over a year ago

.


"I decline so many messages from men with no verifications on the site. They ask why they have no luck on here but it's the way they talk to me and the content of their profile puts me off. You think the daily help we offer on here is enough but nothing changes what I experienced on a daily basis and years being on here.

What could help change this? Support guidance page for people when they initially sign up?

Makes no difference whatsoever what a man writes or put on their profile or messages.

Polite hello how are you and an invitation to talk? You are not trying hard enough.

AN attempt to write complement their pics and profile? Trying too hard.

Show a normal pic of yourself and maybe a slightly rude one [ full body not hardcore? Not rude enough/ not enough on show

Cock pic? Too rude.

A polite detailed written profile? Too much information.

A shirt one inviting people to ask you?

Not detailed enough.

Other things

Too old

Not old enough (really?)

Not ripped enough

Too Ripped

Not Black enough

Not white enough

And various other reasons.

For man on these sites it fosnt matter what you write the sad fact is that women on here are picky and want what they want and can put minimum effort knowing some bloke will answer.

Sad fact is that it is what this lifestyle is.

It is not in men's favour."

Oh I'm sorry have women not got the right to pick who they want to fuck, are we meant to just drop our knickers for anyone who asks

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By *sBlueWoman
over a year ago

Up North


"Yes advice would be good. I can admit that this site is just making me depressed. Being invisible all of the time really gets to you. "

Maybe get better pictures and your bio is very negative

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By *sBlueWoman
over a year ago

Up North


"When I first started on here I got my first verification through a social meet after chatting in the chat room, since then it has been going to clubs that has helped me have meets not through sending messages on here.

You can put so much effort into sending well thought out messages and to no avail, so I have concluded that unless I come across a really exceptional profile that I like I won’t use this sight like that.

I’ll stick to using this forum for fun posts and arranging club meets which works for me

I think you are right there. I'm a really nice guy who's mannerly and polite, but really it gets you nowhere.

I've spent so much time on here constructing the perfect message dozens of times to not even have it read and just deleted. It's very ignorant and it grates with me. If the content of messages and profiles bothers people so much just block them. That's what the block facility is for. I'd love a verification or two, but you cant verify unless you are verified first, and before you do that you have to meet !!!!! I don't do these cam room things my phone isn't up to it. I'm more an old fashioned guy who actually likes to meet people, something that just is ridiculously difficult on this site for no pertinent reason.

In an instant I saw why. "

Me too

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It helps if you are a swinger that is able to meet people whenever ish..... as in not doing this behind your partners back ...

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By *ohn KanakaMan
over a year ago

Not all that North of North London


"I decline so many messages from men with no verifications on the site. They ask why they have no luck on here but it's the way they talk to me and the content of their profile puts me off. You think the daily help we offer on here is enough but nothing changes what I experienced on a daily basis and years being on here.

What could help change this? Support guidance page for people when they initially sign up?

Makes no difference whatsoever what a man writes or put on their profile or messages.

Polite hello how are you and an invitation to talk? You are not trying hard enough.

AN attempt to write complement their pics and profile? Trying too hard.

Show a normal pic of yourself and maybe a slightly rude one [ full body not hardcore? Not rude enough/ not enough on show

Cock pic? Too rude.

A polite detailed written profile? Too much information.

A shirt one inviting people to ask you?

Not detailed enough.

Other things

Too old

Not old enough (really?)

Not ripped enough

Too Ripped

Not Black enough

Not white enough

And various other reasons.

For man on these sites it fosnt matter what you write the sad fact is that women on here are picky and want what they want and can put minimum effort knowing some bloke will answer.

Sad fact is that it is what this lifestyle is.

It is not in men's favour."

Or in short, women have preferences and will obviously only meet those that match them and you have to accept that you won't match most people's preferences.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think there’s just too many men and far few women for every guy to go around. Even the ones who are respectful.

I have no problem doing a webcam and a social meet but the lack for verifications and experience puts people off. I understand that but I’m looking for fwb deal not a one night stand.

I’ve made post about coffee meet and tried local meet-ups pages. Unfortunately no one responds and local county event page has their age requirements above my age so I can’t message them

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I think there’s just too many men and far few women for every guy to go around. Even the ones who are respectful.

I have no problem doing a webcam and a social meet but the lack for verifications and experience puts people off. I understand that but I’m looking for fwb deal not a one night stand.

I’ve made post about coffee meet and tried local meet-ups pages. Unfortunately no one responds and local county event page has their age requirements above my age so I can’t message them "

Also I struggle to know what to write first. If I put “how are you” that just comes as boring and same as mention their pictures. It’s tough when you don’t know someone and you only get one shot

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I decline so many messages from men with no verifications on the site. They ask why they have no luck on here but it's the way they talk to me and the content of their profile puts me off. You think the daily help we offer on here is enough but nothing changes what I experienced on a daily basis and years being on here.

What could help change this? Support guidance page for people when they initially sign up?

I have been a member on here for nearly six months. I only have a verification from a quick cam conversation I had with a local couple, who are no longer on the site. But how do you expect men to get "meet" verifications when people won't meet anyone with no "meet verifications"? It the old catch 22 situation. You can't get a meet verification if people won't meet anyone without meet verifications. It's a vicious circle.

Re look at your profile and how you conduct yourself? I know many new profiles with verifications. So it's not impossible

Any feedback on my profile would be greatly appreciated. Thank you "

It’s a fairly nice profile. Quite friendly and you come across openly.

This is only our opinion but perhaps smile a bit in your pictures?

We’d put the cock pictures friends only.

Good luck

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I just tell everyone, to Update your bio, Tell them you got a super yacht having work done that will be finished sometime next year, you earn 80k+ a month drive a BMW but its in the garage, so expect to see a kia rental till its sorted, you have BBC but no TV licence, (cause girls love a guy living life on the edge) you like fine wine and dine, want to spend money on them, (but make sure they meet you at the house, and you mate, before you leave for the meal) when the time comes to pay for the dinner run and leave her at the table. And just keep making new accounts after each meet. Works every time.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I just tell everyone, to Update your bio, Tell them you got a super yacht having work done that will be finished sometime next year, you earn 80k+ a month drive a BMW but its in the garage, so expect to see a kia rental till its sorted, you have BBC but no TV licence, (cause girls love a guy living life on the edge) you like fine wine and dine, want to spend money on them, (but make sure they meet you at the house, and you mate, before you leave for the meal) when the time comes to pay for the dinner run and leave her at the table. And just keep making new accounts after each meet. Works every time. "

Todays sophisticated young ladies like Fine Wines, Belgian Chocolates and the manly smell of a pipe. Here’s my card, gold card to the Pink Pussycat club..

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By *amesBeelzebubMan
over a year ago

norwich

I'm certainly no expert and have my fair share of non replies but from my experience when I get replies I do onevor more of the following.

Message something original and if possible funny

Don't send a dick pic

Send a face pic

Actually read a profile before you message someone and make the message personalised and not just a copy and paste generic 'hi You Ok '

And make your profile more interesting with actual words and some nice teasing photos.

Now, cue all the replies to tell me to shut up because my profile is rubbish and i don't have a clue what women want.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I personally have no issues meeting unverified people. It will always depend on if they are respectful, have something to say and I find them attractive. That's just the starting point. We have to get on I couldn't have sex with someone if I thought they were a twat lol.

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By *arried-BBW-LookingWoman
over a year ago

Truro

I honestly try to reply to every message, but as soon as any woman joins even me receive hundreds of messages, I added a new picture yesterday and I’ve still got 121 messages to reply to, I will only meet guys with verifications as I meet alone at my house so one it’s a safety thing and it’s also a way of filtering out some guys, I’m sure I’ve deleted or dismissed some absolutely great guys, but even then women get inundated with messages how do you choose who to chat to then meet? Like I’ve said I’m nothing special but even I have to put some stipulations on who I’m willing to meet, a little advice for guys without verifications try going to a club or a party I’m sure people will give you verifications xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have given up to be honest. I'm very pleasant with all my messages and so not send cock pictures but it's either delete or not read.

Some people have politely replied and turned me down. But I always send them a message back thanking them for responding.

I do not understand why people get the hump if they get turned down. Must have a screw loose imo

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By *bi HaiveMan
Forum Mod

over a year ago

Cheeseville, Somerset


"I think there’s just too many men and far few women for every guy to go around. Even the ones who are respectful.

I have no problem doing a webcam and a social meet but the lack for verifications and experience puts people off. I understand that but I’m looking for fwb deal not a one night stand.

I’ve made post about coffee meet and tried local meet-ups pages. Unfortunately no one responds and local county event page has their age requirements above my age so I can’t message them "

'To go around' ?

I didn't know this was an equal rights thing where everyone was entitled to meet someone. I thought it was a place where people could freely make a choice based on attraction, interest and personal preference?

'Even the ones who are respectful'....sorry, but being respectful doesn't mean someone will want to meet you. It helps open a conversation but offers no guarantees at all and nor should it. Nobody is entitled to a meet just because they’re 'nice'.

A

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By *humper.Man
over a year ago

northumberland/scotland


"I think there’s just too many men and far few women for every guy to go around. Even the ones who are respectful.

I have no problem doing a webcam and a social meet but the lack for verifications and experience puts people off. I understand that but I’m looking for fwb deal not a one night stand.

I’ve made post about coffee meet and tried local meet-ups pages. Unfortunately no one responds and local county event page has their age requirements above my age so I can’t message them

'To go around' ?

I didn't know this was an equal rights thing where everyone was entitled to meet someone. I thought it was a place where people could freely make a choice based on attraction, interest and personal preference?

'Even the ones who are respectful'....sorry, but being respectful doesn't mean someone will want to meet you. It helps open a conversation but offers no guarantees at all and nor should it. Nobody is entitled to a meet just because they’re 'nice'.

A"

I love how you articulate your replies on various threads. You two are fucking excellent in the forums.

Respectfully, Thumper.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"'To go around' ?

I didn't know this was an equal rights thing where everyone was entitled to meet someone. I thought it was a place where people could freely make a choice based on attraction, interest and personal preference?

'Even the ones who are respectful'....sorry, but being respectful doesn't mean someone will want to meet you. It helps open a conversation but offers no guarantees at all and nor should it. Nobody is entitled to a meet just because they’re 'nice'.

A"

To go around as in there’s way more men than women, so women have to be more selective. I get that, I do and how everyone has their own preferences and can meet who they want. You can be what they’re after but still not get a meet and I get that cos you can’t meet everyone. I was just referring to the comment that being nice doesn’t exactly help

No you make a good point and I agree. I didn’t mean everyone whose nice is entitled to get meets. Being respectful is the standard and a decent human being.

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By *rlandoMan
over a year ago

Lincolnshire


"I decline so many messages from men with no verifications on the site. They ask why they have no luck on here but it's the way they talk to me and the content of their profile puts me off. You think the daily help we offer on here is enough but nothing changes what I experienced on a daily basis and years being on here.

What could help change this? Support guidance page for people when they initially sign up?"

The first thing all guys do when they find it tough is think

A . Need to try harder .

B. Change profile .

There s no shortage of Anonymous profiles , (male and female ) who want to give free advice .

Most people on here are not swingers . or all that fab ..Swinging is a niche activity , usually a hobby couples participate with other couples ...

not a way to get an easy shag unless you are Brad Pits better looking double ..

My tuppence worth is chill out and go to a social and meet females face to face , ignore the rest of the ******** ....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just go to a swingers club....instead of spending months getting no where on here ....at swingers clubs you will meet actual people

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By *instonandLadyAstorCouple
over a year ago

Not where we seem to be...


"Its the same as its always been

I think you'll find the neighbours watch you here more without you knowing &

Quite badly dangerously thats the way its always been, 1-2 pairs or trios rotating watching shitting you off.

Normally find they work for IBM or been HMP majesties services

Its always the talk to avoid in the clubs

Pretty disgusting for genuine relationships (that dont need criminal activity)"

What a marvellous word salad.....

Winston

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By *bi HaiveMan
Forum Mod

over a year ago

Cheeseville, Somerset


"I think there’s just too many men and far few women for every guy to go around. Even the ones who are respectful.

I have no problem doing a webcam and a social meet but the lack for verifications and experience puts people off. I understand that but I’m looking for fwb deal not a one night stand.

I’ve made post about coffee meet and tried local meet-ups pages. Unfortunately no one responds and local county event page has their age requirements above my age so I can’t message them

'To go around' ?

I didn't know this was an equal rights thing where everyone was entitled to meet someone. I thought it was a place where people could freely make a choice based on attraction, interest and personal preference?

'Even the ones who are respectful'....sorry, but being respectful doesn't mean someone will want to meet you. It helps open a conversation but offers no guarantees at all and nor should it. Nobody is entitled to a meet just because they’re 'nice'.

A

I love how you articulate your replies on various threads. You two are fucking excellent in the forums.

Respectfully, Thumper. "

Thanks.

I suspect I upset as many as I do impress but I don't play to an audience. And having been on here a fair while in both single and couple guises I don't subscribe to any 'woe is me' attitudes expressed by some segments of Fab society.

I've known more guys who've lived a stress free, hassle free, enjoyable life on here than I ever have couples and single women. There's far less pressure as a guy, less expectancy and less admin in terms of dealing with unwanted attention from bland, effortless profiles. All you have to do is have a sensible head and some common sense.

And not think Fab is the best place to source your sexual needs.

It really is as simple as that.

Oh. And Fox never posts in here so all opinions, views, theories, comments and general bullshit is all me. She thinks I spend too much time arguing with people I'd be better off ignoring. She's probably right, but then I think she spends too much time online shopping so it balances out nicely.....

A

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By *instonandLadyAstorCouple
over a year ago

Not where we seem to be...


"I think there’s just too many men and far few women for every guy to go around. Even the ones who are respectful.

I have no problem doing a webcam and a social meet but the lack for verifications and experience puts people off. I understand that but I’m looking for fwb deal not a one night stand.

I’ve made post about coffee meet and tried local meet-ups pages. Unfortunately no one responds and local county event page has their age requirements above my age so I can’t message them

'To go around' ?

I didn't know this was an equal rights thing where everyone was entitled to meet someone. I thought it was a place where people could freely make a choice based on attraction, interest and personal preference?

'Even the ones who are respectful'....sorry, but being respectful doesn't mean someone will want to meet you. It helps open a conversation but offers no guarantees at all and nor should it. Nobody is entitled to a meet just because they’re 'nice'.

A

I love how you articulate your replies on various threads. You two are fucking excellent in the forums.

Respectfully, Thumper.

Thanks.

I suspect I upset as many as I do impress but I don't play to an audience. And having been on here a fair while in both single and couple guises I don't subscribe to any 'woe is me' attitudes expressed by some segments of Fab society.

I've known more guys who've lived a stress free, hassle free, enjoyable life on here than I ever have couples and single women. There's far less pressure as a guy, less expectancy and less admin in terms of dealing with unwanted attention from bland, effortless profiles. All you have to do is have a sensible head and some common sense.

And not think Fab is the best place to source your sexual needs.

It really is as simple as that.

Oh. And Fox never posts in here so all opinions, views, theories, comments and general bullshit is all me. She thinks I spend too much time arguing with people I'd be better off ignoring. She's probably right, but then I think she spends too much time online shopping so it balances out nicely.....

A"

I've always liked your posts, it wasn't quite the same while you were away.

Don't lose your password again FFS.

Winston

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By *jonesMan
over a year ago

Plymouth


"I think there’s just too many men and far few women for every guy to go around. Even the ones who are respectful.

I have no problem doing a webcam and a social meet but the lack for verifications and experience puts people off. I understand that but I’m looking for fwb deal not a one night stand.

I’ve made post about coffee meet and tried local meet-ups pages. Unfortunately no one responds and local county event page has their age requirements above my age so I can’t message them

'To go around' ?

I didn't know this was an equal rights thing where everyone was entitled to meet someone. I thought it was a place where people could freely make a choice based on attraction, interest and personal preference?

'Even the ones who are respectful'....sorry, but being respectful doesn't mean someone will want to meet you. It helps open a conversation but offers no guarantees at all and nor should it. Nobody is entitled to a meet just because they’re 'nice'.

A

I love how you articulate your replies on various threads. You two are fucking excellent in the forums.

Respectfully, Thumper.

Thanks.

I suspect I upset as many as I do impress but I don't play to an audience. And having been on here a fair while in both single and couple guises I don't subscribe to any 'woe is me' attitudes expressed by some segments of Fab society.

I've known more guys who've lived a stress free, hassle free, enjoyable life on here than I ever have couples and single women. There's far less pressure as a guy, less expectancy and less admin in terms of dealing with unwanted attention from bland, effortless profiles. All you have to do is have a sensible head and some common sense.

And not think Fab is the best place to source your sexual needs.

It really is as simple as that.

Oh. And Fox never posts in here so all opinions, views, theories, comments and general bullshit is all me. She thinks I spend too much time arguing with people I'd be better off ignoring. She's probably right, but then I think she spends too much time online shopping so it balances out nicely.....

A"

Fab is rather similar to online shopping , it's just the merchandise can be dodgy and expensive and it might not even turn up

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By *bi HaiveMan
Forum Mod

over a year ago

Cheeseville, Somerset


"I think there’s just too many men and far few women for every guy to go around. Even the ones who are respectful.

I have no problem doing a webcam and a social meet but the lack for verifications and experience puts people off. I understand that but I’m looking for fwb deal not a one night stand.

I’ve made post about coffee meet and tried local meet-ups pages. Unfortunately no one responds and local county event page has their age requirements above my age so I can’t message them

'To go around' ?

I didn't know this was an equal rights thing where everyone was entitled to meet someone. I thought it was a place where people could freely make a choice based on attraction, interest and personal preference?

'Even the ones who are respectful'....sorry, but being respectful doesn't mean someone will want to meet you. It helps open a conversation but offers no guarantees at all and nor should it. Nobody is entitled to a meet just because they’re 'nice'.

A

I love how you articulate your replies on various threads. You two are fucking excellent in the forums.

Respectfully, Thumper.

Thanks.

I suspect I upset as many as I do impress but I don't play to an audience. And having been on here a fair while in both single and couple guises I don't subscribe to any 'woe is me' attitudes expressed by some segments of Fab society.

I've known more guys who've lived a stress free, hassle free, enjoyable life on here than I ever have couples and single women. There's far less pressure as a guy, less expectancy and less admin in terms of dealing with unwanted attention from bland, effortless profiles. All you have to do is have a sensible head and some common sense.

And not think Fab is the best place to source your sexual needs.

It really is as simple as that.

Oh. And Fox never posts in here so all opinions, views, theories, comments and general bullshit is all me. She thinks I spend too much time arguing with people I'd be better off ignoring. She's probably right, but then I think she spends too much time online shopping so it balances out nicely.....

A

I've always liked your posts, it wasn't quite the same while you were away.

Don't lose your password again FFS.

Winston "

Just in case I do.......

It's 'iloveboris99'

Ive bookmarked this thread so I can log in to find it in an emergency.

A

*hang on a minute....

.

.

.

.

.

Fuck.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *arkandlovelyWoman
over a year ago

South Derbyshire

I think many of them are only interested finding a hole to use. The fact there's a living, feeling human attached to those holes is more of an annoyance than anything else.

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By *izzy.miss.lizzyCouple
over a year ago

Pembrokeshire


"I decline so many messages from men with no verifications on the site. They ask why they have no luck on here but it's the way they talk to me and the content of their profile puts me off. You think the daily help we offer on here is enough but nothing changes what I experienced on a daily basis and years being on here.

What could help change this? Support guidance page for people when they initially sign up?"

agree with you

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By *m2276Man
over a year ago

whiteley

I couldn’t agree more, I’m sadly not surprised at the “it’s so unfair tone of many of these posts”. The simple fact is there is way more men than there are women on here and therefore you need to make an effort, be polite, be interesting and actually treat this person like a human not a fuck toy, you still may get rejected because that’s fab but in which case show some class and dignity.

My partner who I met post being on fab (before I get it’s easy for you to say) gets some horrifically rude messages from men who then wonder why she blocks them ( most of these are unverified funnily enough), she actually makes an effort to respond to polite well mannered messages so it’s not surprising many woman are rightly jaded by being bombarded by 200 messages a day saying hi with a cock pic…..

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By *ucka39Man
over a year ago

Newcastle

Could it not also be that their own location their is not as many as other area's so some are willing to or need to travel whereas others not as much . Area based could also be lacking in women compared to others to meet the preferred requirements looks equipment and a sense of humour

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By *he Happy ManMan
over a year ago

Merseyside


"I decline so many messages from men with no verifications on the site. They ask why they have no luck on here but it's the way they talk to me and the content of their profile puts me off. You think the daily help we offer on here is enough but nothing changes what I experienced on a daily basis and years being on here.

What could help change this? Support guidance page for people when they initially sign up?"

I am sure somebody will call me a white night in shining armour.

Sadly nothing is going to change some men's behavior.

Over about 17 years in between relationships I have tried various swinging and dating websites. Fab is the only one I have stayed on. Both paid membership and free membership dating and swinging websites you get the same problems with all of them.

I have suggested a few times we have a FAQ (Frequently Asked Questions) part of the forum. Hopefully, it would stop getting the same questions being asked over and over. Sadly admin has said less than 1% of Fab members use the forums.

Long-time forum readers will know some questions get asked weekly if not daily.

Is it rude not to reply? I send out emails but get ignored. (Get over it. The woman, man, or couple you emailed is not interested. If they were interested they would have replied).

What should I put in my profile? (It's not your profile if you write it based on what people say you should write. Be yourself)

Too many people send generic copy-and-paste messages (again be yourself).

I have been on here for two weeks and I have not had a meet, (swinger does not mean I fuck anybody who asks).

Some (not all men) think sending you an email describing what they would do to you if they met you will turn you on.

Some men (not all men) are just looking for another notch on the bedpost and a one-off meet.

If I was a woman I would make men get to know me online first. That will get rid of the guys looking for a quick one-off fuck. If a guy treats you with disrespect or talks to you badly block them. Although in saying that it is hard for us guys to know what type of talk a woman wants. I have had a woman talk to me via email and got blocked because the talk turned sexual. On the reverse side of the coin I have had a woman stop talking to me because she wanted a sex chat, she wanted me to talk about what we would get up to if we met. We guys are not mind read lol. Give us a clue about what type of chat you want.

If a guy's profile puts you off move on to the next profile.

If a guy has clearly not read your profile or lives hundreds of miles away delete the email and also maybe block him.

Most of all stick to what you want. If A guy can't give you what you want it is his loss not ours.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *he Happy ManMan
over a year ago

Merseyside


"I decline so many messages from men with no verifications on the site. They ask why they have no luck on here but it's the way they talk to me and the content of their profile puts me off. You think the daily help we offer on here is enough but nothing changes what I experienced on a daily basis and years being on here.

What could help change this? Support guidance page for people when they initially sign up?

A guide to setting up a good profile could be good"

Sadly I don't think that would work. You get a lot of guys (mostly) asking how to improve their profile. They get good advice. You look at their profile 2 - 4 weeks later and nothing has changed.

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By *he Happy ManMan
over a year ago

Merseyside


"My profile is good and I write nice, polite initial messages. It quite often leads to nothing...."

I have to disagree. No matter how good you think your profile is

Some people will think it is a great profile.

Some people will think it is an average profile

and

Some people will think it is a crap profile.

You cannot please all of the people all of the time.

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By *he Happy ManMan
over a year ago

Merseyside


"When I first started on here I got my first verification through a social meet after chatting in the chat room, since then it has been going to clubs that has helped me have meets not through sending messages on here.

You can put so much effort into sending well thought out messages and to no avail, so I have concluded that unless I come across a really exceptional profile that I like I won’t use this sight like that.

I’ll stick to using this forum for fun posts and arranging club meets which works for me

I think you are right there. I'm a really nice guy who's mannerly and polite, but really it gets you nowhere.

I've spent so much time on here constructing the perfect message dozens of times to not even have it read and just deleted. It's very ignorant and it grates with me. If the content of messages and profiles bothers people so much just block them. That's what the block facility is for. I'd love a verification or two, but you cant verify unless you are verified first, and before you do that you have to meet !!!!! I don't do these cam room things my phone isn't up to it. I'm more an old fashioned guy who actually likes to meet people, something that just is ridiculously difficult on this site for no pertinent reason. "

There is no such thing as the perfect message. You can't mind read the person you message. When you send a message some people will think it is good, some people will think it is average, and some people will think it is shit.

Also, many women and couples have said on here that before they open your message they read your profile. If they don't like your profile your message is not getting opened.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I think many of them are only interested finding a hole to use. The fact there's a living, feeling human attached to those holes is more of an annoyance than anything else."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I think many of them are only interested finding a hole to use. The fact there's a living, feeling human attached to those holes is more of an annoyance than anything else."

100%

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By *amnaughtybutniceWoman
over a year ago

tf1

Don’t give the idiots a guide fgs. The trash takes itself out with the bad messages and bad profiles.

I get lots of messages

I look at the first line before opening it. If it says how r u or something similar I ignore.

If I have time on my hands I look at the profile. If the profile has no pics on, no about me, they live miles away, they have pics of woman on their profile I delete the message without reading.

If the profile interests me I read the message. If the message contains a dick pic or it’s a really rubbish message I delete.

Sometimes the message will catch my eye and I respond.

I have met guys with no verifications because it doesn’t necessarily mean they are time wasters. But I prefer to meet at clubs.

If your message is take me to club with you I will ignore.

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By *izandpaulCouple
over a year ago

merseyside


"I decline so many messages from men with no verifications on the site. They ask why they have no luck on here but it's the way they talk to me and the content of their profile puts me off. You think the daily help we offer on here is enough but nothing changes what I experienced on a daily basis and years being on here.

What could help change this? Support guidance page for people when they initially sign up?

I have been a member on here for nearly six months. I only have a verification from a quick cam conversation I had with a local couple, who are no longer on the site. But how do you expect men to get "meet" verifications when people won't meet anyone with no "meet verifications"? It the old catch 22 situation. You can't get a meet verification if people won't meet anyone without meet verifications. It's a vicious circle. "

We love meeting single guys, both at clubs, parties, holidays and socials.

The easiest one to start is a group social, plenty on here, just put on your glad rags and pop along.

We love em.

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By *amnaughtybutniceWoman
over a year ago

tf1


"When I first started on here I got my first verification through a social meet after chatting in the chat room, since then it has been going to clubs that has helped me have meets not through sending messages on here.

You can put so much effort into sending well thought out messages and to no avail, so I have concluded that unless I come across a really exceptional profile that I like I won’t use this sight like that.

I’ll stick to using this forum for fun posts and arranging club meets which works for me

I think you are right there. I'm a really nice guy who's mannerly and polite, but really it gets you nowhere.

I've spent so much time on here constructing the perfect message dozens of times to not even have it read and just deleted. It's very ignorant and it grates with me. If the content of messages and profiles bothers people so much just block them. That's what the block facility is for. I'd love a verification or two, but you cant verify unless you are verified first, and before you do that you have to meet !!!!! I don't do these cam room things my phone isn't up to it. I'm more an old fashioned guy who actually likes to meet people, something that just is ridiculously difficult on this site for no pertinent reason. "

So you read the forums on a regular basis but haven’t worked out why your profile would be instantly ignored ?

And you do know women gets tons of messages why would they bother to message you. One look at your profile and it’s an instant ignore.

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By *teveanddebsCouple
over a year ago

Norwich


"

You cannot please all of the people all of the time."

And that is the most important thing to remember.

Whatever you put on it someone will say "don't put that put this yada, yada" and definitely don't try and cover all the bases, that just looks like desperation.

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By *instonandLadyAstorCouple
over a year ago

Not where we seem to be...


"I think there’s just too many men and far few women for every guy to go around. Even the ones who are respectful.

I have no problem doing a webcam and a social meet but the lack for verifications and experience puts people off. I understand that but I’m looking for fwb deal not a one night stand.

I’ve made post about coffee meet and tried local meet-ups pages. Unfortunately no one responds and local county event page has their age requirements above my age so I can’t message them

'To go around' ?

I didn't know this was an equal rights thing where everyone was entitled to meet someone. I thought it was a place where people could freely make a choice based on attraction, interest and personal preference?

'Even the ones who are respectful'....sorry, but being respectful doesn't mean someone will want to meet you. It helps open a conversation but offers no guarantees at all and nor should it. Nobody is entitled to a meet just because they’re 'nice'.

A

I love how you articulate your replies on various threads. You two are fucking excellent in the forums.

Respectfully, Thumper.

Thanks.

I suspect I upset as many as I do impress but I don't play to an audience. And having been on here a fair while in both single and couple guises I don't subscribe to any 'woe is me' attitudes expressed by some segments of Fab society.

I've known more guys who've lived a stress free, hassle free, enjoyable life on here than I ever have couples and single women. There's far less pressure as a guy, less expectancy and less admin in terms of dealing with unwanted attention from bland, effortless profiles. All you have to do is have a sensible head and some common sense.

And not think Fab is the best place to source your sexual needs.

It really is as simple as that.

Oh. And Fox never posts in here so all opinions, views, theories, comments and general bullshit is all me. She thinks I spend too much time arguing with people I'd be better off ignoring. She's probably right, but then I think she spends too much time online shopping so it balances out nicely.....

A

I've always liked your posts, it wasn't quite the same while you were away.

Don't lose your password again FFS.

Winston

Just in case I do.......

It's 'iloveboris99'

Ive bookmarked this thread so I can log in to find it in an emergency.

A

*hang on a minute....

.

.

.

.

.

Fuck."

Don't panic, I've written it down in my password notebook.

Winston

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Yes advice would be good. I can admit that this site is just making me depressed. Being invisible all of the time really gets to you. "

Get yourself to clubs and socials in the new year!

Get out there to the places where swingers are if you want to be involved and meet them…

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By *oiluvfunMan
over a year ago

Penrith


"Yes advice would be good. I can admit that this site is just making me depressed. Being invisible all of the time really gets to you.

Get yourself to clubs and socials in the new year!

Get out there to the places where swingers are if you want to be involved and meet them… "

Just choose which club you visit as a single guy very carefully; I’ve found some clubs to be the loneliest places on earth, to be a single guy in

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By *host63Man
over a year ago

Bedfont Feltham

Those that take objection to my reply to the op.

I have no expectation or sense of entitlement.

And those that have written negatively have totally missed the point as usual.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't have any luck on here I'm a genuine guy thanks fuck boys lol

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By *izandpaulCouple
over a year ago

merseyside


"Those that take objection to my reply to the op.

I have no expectation or sense of entitlement.

And those that have written negatively have totally missed the point as usual."

We've been told we have a sense of entitlement as we pick and choose couples as well as single guys.

We try to be open and honest about the type of people we prefer and we are not looking for long term friends just recreational sex.

Take no notice of folks on here or any other social media site, stick to what you like and go with it.

Don't be nasty, rude or insulting but best way is not to engage as 99% of folks on here will never enter your radar.

Don't be put off there are some fabulous people on here.

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By *ucka39Man
over a year ago

Newcastle

I think maybe if was just the basic guidance to assist with few tips as people struggle where to begin too create their bio as it's all or not due to effort. I have and had friends on here with very limited amount on their bio and we've been very good friends for many years even away from the site so is or isn't a secret formula. approach can put weigh everything

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By *ucka39Man
over a year ago

Newcastle

Outweigh everything

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I think maybe if was just the basic guidance to assist with few tips as people struggle where to begin too create their bio as it's all or not due to effort. I have and had friends on here with very limited amount on their bio and we've been very good friends for many years even away from the site so is or isn't a secret formula. approach can put weigh everything "
still no luck lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’ve been on here for ages and just trying to get a reply is like getting blood from a stone

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By *ucka39Man
over a year ago

Newcastle


"I’ve been on here for ages and just trying to get a reply is like getting blood from a stone "

loads of helpful advice within the forums just search profile help and advice mind you their is loads hopefully it helps you browse it all

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"With both a couple's profile and (so far unsuccessful) single guy profile, I thought I'd throw in a few thoughts.

With many guys' profiles it's obvious why they don't or do get meets. But others seem to follow the advice and still don't get; others seem to have nothing gone for them (looks, classy photos, great writing) and do get. I think there has to be some far more nuanced distinction that the cliched advice one sees doesn't quite explain. "

Yes there is. That nuanced thing is attraction. And sometimes it's inexplicable

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Yes advice would be good. I can admit that this site is just making me depressed. Being invisible all of the time really gets to you.

Get yourself to clubs and socials in the new year!

Get out there to the places where swingers are if you want to be involved and meet them…

-

Just choose which club you visit as a single guy very carefully; I’ve found some clubs to be the loneliest places on earth, to be a single guy in "

-

Well nothing is guaranteed…

It’s just pure luck on what the club will be like, sometimes it’s busy but nobody takes your fancy, it could be quiet and all it takes is that one person. At the right time & place.

The general gist of what I’m saying is if you want to be a swinger and get involved, then get yourself out there.

There is no need to have a support guidance page as I believe that wouldn’t help. The way you make yourself on here should come from yourself ie not being told what to write and how to get a reply…

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By *bi HaiveMan
Forum Mod

over a year ago

Cheeseville, Somerset


"Yes advice would be good. I can admit that this site is just making me depressed. Being invisible all of the time really gets to you.

Get yourself to clubs and socials in the new year!

Get out there to the places where swingers are if you want to be involved and meet them…

-

Just choose which club you visit as a single guy very carefully; I’ve found some clubs to be the loneliest places on earth, to be a single guy in

-

Well nothing is guaranteed…

It’s just pure luck on what the club will be like, sometimes it’s busy but nobody takes your fancy, it could be quiet and all it takes is that one person. At the right time & place.

The general gist of what I’m saying is if you want to be a swinger and get involved, then get yourself out there.

There is no need to have a support guidance page as I believe that wouldn’t help. The way you make yourself on here should come from yourself ie not being told what to write and how to get a reply…"

^^^^^^^^^^^^

This 100000000%

The perfect reply...and from a single guy too.

Clubs aren't a guaranteed solution for anyone - single guy, single gal or couple. Even if the facilities are fabulous, the prices fair and reasonable and the bricks and mortar top notch, you'll rarely know (unless an event with a guest list publicly visible) who will be there on any given night. But you really do boost your chances and its the only way to really show people who you are, what you look like and engage in real conversation as opposed to firing messages back and forth and hoping your visuals and words typed on a keyboard will attract interest.

And as for the advice, guidance and FAQ suggestions?

Nope. All that does is create carbon vopy profiles with no individuality, personality or uniqueness. People, whether men, women or couples, will look for a template that seems to work for others, ideas on opening messages that result in a standardisation of contact, photo inspiration that they'll copy making it difficult to gauge whether someone is genuinely visually attractive or just emulating other successful profiles and the whole site becomes like those god awful Instagram stories where everyone looks the same, acts the same and is doing the same thing.

Fuck that.

Be yourself and accept you won't be of interest to everyone and everyone won't be of interest to you.

A

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The end..lol

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