FabSwingers.com forum: The unspoken rules of sex

By *tingly Byron OP Man
over a year ago

In a town Fab forgot

50% of the time a woman saying “don’t stop I’m about to come” will make you come and ruin her orgasm. This a cruel glitch that hasn’t yet been patched.

Wash your genitals.

Dot lie about being on the pill.

The difference between “fetish” and “felony” is checking beforehand.

If you’re using anal beads do not pull them out and say “and tonight’s winning Powerball numbers are…………”

As a guy, its an unspoken law to alert your partner before you come.

Don’t blow into the vagina. Ever.

If you fart whilst receiving a blow job and she keeps going like nothing happened, you are required to buy her something shiny and valuable.

Take a pee after sex, it will help prevent infections.

One does not just “oops” it in the backdoor.

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By *he Mac LassWoman
over a year ago

Hefty Hideaway

Always supply condoms incase he ‘forgets’

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By *aven RedWoman
over a year ago

Liverpool

Still giggling reading this x

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By *he Mac LassWoman
over a year ago

Hefty Hideaway

"If you’re using anal beads do not pull them out and say “and tonight’s winning Powerball numbers are…………”"

You spoil all my fun

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Don’t assume all your cock has to go in

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Still giggling reading this x"

Same here haha

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By *nabelle21Woman
over a year ago

B38

"If you’re using anal beads do not pull them out and say “and tonight’s winning Powerball numbers are…………”

You spoil all my fun

It's probably the only time I'd win a lucky dip

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If you’re using anal beads do not pull them out and say “and tonight’s winning Powerball numbers are…………”

You spoil all my fun

That got me

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By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago

South Wales

Don’t insert a finger up a guy’s bum and say “hang on....I was wearing a ring” unless you want your hand ripped off when he startles

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When you hear the cry, “wrong hole”!!

Stop pushing

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"50% of the time a woman saying “don’t stop I’m about to come” will make you come and ruin her orgasm. This a cruel glitch that hasn’t yet been patched.

Wash your genitals.

Dot lie about being on the pill.

The difference between “fetish” and “felony” is checking beforehand.

If you’re using anal beads do not pull them out and say “and tonight’s winning Powerball numbers are…………”

As a guy, its an unspoken law to alert your partner before you come.

Don’t blow into the vagina. Ever.

If you fart whilst receiving a blow job and she keeps going like nothing happened, you are required to buy her something shiny and valuable.

Take a pee after sex, it will help prevent infections.

One does not just “oops” it in the backdoor.

The fart one gave me a good giggle

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Don’t insert a finger up a guy’s bum and say “hang on....I was wearing a ring” unless you want your hand ripped off when he startles

I was just thinking this haha

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"When you hear the cry, “wrong hole”!!

Stop pushing

LJ"

Push even harder

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"50% of the time a woman saying “don’t stop I’m about to come” will make you come and ruin her orgasm. This a cruel glitch that hasn’t yet been patched.

Wash your genitals.

Dot lie about being on the pill.

The difference between “fetish” and “felony” is checking beforehand.

If you’re using anal beads do not pull them out and say “and tonight’s winning Powerball numbers are…………”

As a guy, its an unspoken law to alert your partner before you come.

Don’t blow into the vagina. Ever.

If you fart whilst receiving a blow job and she keeps going like nothing happened, you are required to buy her something shiny and valuable.

Take a pee after sex, it will help prevent infections.

One does not just “oops” it in the backdoor.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"When you hear the cry, “wrong hole”!!

Stop pushing

Push even harder

Only if you want to wear your balls as earrings afterwards

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By *tingly Byron OP Man
over a year ago

In a town Fab forgot

The last one tickled me the most......

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't understand the 2nd one.

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By *tingly Byron OP Man
over a year ago

In a town Fab forgot

"I don't understand the 2nd one."

Good housekeeping I'd say.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"When you hear the cry, “wrong hole”!!

Stop pushing

Push even harder

Only if you want to wear your balls as earrings afterwards

LJ"

Hahahaha you bloody would have, if you hadn't stopped pushing. That was funny!

Holly.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I don't understand the 2nd one.

Good housekeeping I'd say.

Dangle it in the sink.

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By *tingly Byron OP Man
over a year ago

In a town Fab forgot

"I don't understand the 2nd one.

Good housekeeping I'd say.

Dangle it in the sink.

What if it's too short?

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By *educedWoman
over a year ago

Birmingham

"I don't understand the 2nd one.

Good housekeeping I'd say.

Dangle it in the sink.

What if it's too short?

Fabreze it?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I don't understand the 2nd one.

Good housekeeping I'd say.

Dangle it in the sink.

What if it's too short?

Fabreze it? "

Wet wipe wash

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Cheers stingly

Question:

If these rules are unwritten and Lacey doesn’t know about them then there’s no need to obey them surely?

Especially the last one!

Oops I did it again isn’t just a classic Britney track you know

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By *pursChick aka ShortieWoman
over a year ago

On a mooch

"50% of the time a woman saying “don’t stop I’m about to come” will make you come and ruin her orgasm. This a cruel glitch that hasn’t yet been patched.

Wash your genitals.

Dot lie about being on the pill.

The difference between “fetish” and “felony” is checking beforehand.

If you’re using anal beads do not pull them out and say “and tonight’s winning Powerball numbers are…………”

As a guy, its an unspoken law to alert your partner before you come.

Don’t blow into the vagina. Ever.

If you fart whilst receiving a blow job and she keeps going like nothing happened, you are required to buy her something shiny and valuable.

Take a pee after sex, it will help prevent infections.

One does not just “oops” it in the backdoor.

How do you not stop doing a bj if a guy farts ? I would be laughing

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By *andonmessMan
over a year ago

A world all of his own

"50% of the time a woman saying “don’t stop I’m about to come” will make you come and ruin her orgasm. This a cruel glitch that hasn’t yet been patched.

Wash your genitals.

Dot lie about being on the pill.

The difference between “fetish” and “felony” is checking beforehand.

If you’re using anal beads do not pull them out and say “and tonight’s winning Powerball numbers are…………”

As a guy, its an unspoken law to alert your partner before you come.

Don’t blow into the vagina. Ever.

If you fart whilst receiving a blow job and she keeps going like nothing happened, you are required to buy her something shiny and valuable.

Take a pee after sex, it will help prevent infections.

One does not just “oops” it in the backdoor.

How do you not stop doing a bj if a guy farts ? I would be laughing "

A peg on your nose, and ear plugs? Bit of a faf, granted.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"50% of the time a woman saying “don’t stop I’m about to come” will make you come and ruin her orgasm. This a cruel glitch that hasn’t yet been patched.

Wash your genitals.

Dot lie about being on the pill.

The difference between “fetish” and “felony” is checking beforehand.

If you’re using anal beads do not pull them out and say “and tonight’s winning Powerball numbers are…………”

As a guy, its an unspoken law to alert your partner before you come.

Don’t blow into the vagina. Ever.

If you fart whilst receiving a blow job and she keeps going like nothing happened, you are required to buy her something shiny and valuable.

Take a pee after sex, it will help prevent infections.

One does not just “oops” it in the backdoor.

I'm owed something shiny and valuable

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By *tingly Byron OP Man
over a year ago

In a town Fab forgot

"50% of the time a woman saying “don’t stop I’m about to come” will make you come and ruin her orgasm. This a cruel glitch that hasn’t yet been patched.

Wash your genitals.

Dot lie about being on the pill.

The difference between “fetish” and “felony” is checking beforehand.

If you’re using anal beads do not pull them out and say “and tonight’s winning Powerball numbers are…………”

As a guy, its an unspoken law to alert your partner before you come.

Don’t blow into the vagina. Ever.

If you fart whilst receiving a blow job and she keeps going like nothing happened, you are required to buy her something shiny and valuable.

Take a pee after sex, it will help prevent infections.

One does not just “oops” it in the backdoor.

I'm owed something shiny and valuable

Lib?

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By *tingly Byron OP Man
over a year ago

In a town Fab forgot

"Cheers stingly

Question:

If these rules are unwritten and Lacey doesn’t know about them then there’s no need to obey them surely?

Especially the last one!

Oops I did it again isn’t just a classic Britney track you know

In that case just obey the ones you like the look of.

Always go for the easy wins.

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

"50% of the time a woman saying “don’t stop I’m about to come” will make you come and ruin her orgasm. This a cruel glitch that hasn’t yet been patched.

Wash your genitals.

Dot lie about being on the pill.

The difference between “fetish” and “felony” is checking beforehand.

If you’re using anal beads do not pull them out and say “and tonight’s winning Powerball numbers are…………”

As a guy, its an unspoken law to alert your partner before you come.

Don’t blow into the vagina. Ever.

If you fart whilst receiving a blow job and she keeps going like nothing happened, you are required to buy her something shiny and valuable.

Take a pee after sex, it will help prevent infections.

One does not just “oops” it in the backdoor.

I'm owed something shiny and valuable

So am I!

I also want someone to find the patch for the glitch in the first one.

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By *ebjonnsonMan
over a year ago

Maldon

Don’t choose ‘harder’ as your safe word.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Have a wank at home before you come and see me. Trust me. It's for the best

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By *hoenixAdAstraWoman
over a year ago

Hiding in the shadows

If you fart whilst receiving a blow job and she keeps going like nothing happened, you are required to buy her something shiny and valuable.

Any guidance on farting when the roles are reversed?

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By *uke olovingmanMan
over a year ago

Gravesend

"50% of the time a woman saying “don’t stop I’m about to come” will make you come and ruin her orgasm. This a cruel glitch that hasn’t yet been patched.

Wash your genitals.

Dot lie about being on the pill.

The difference between “fetish” and “felony” is checking beforehand.

If you’re using anal beads do not pull them out and say “and tonight’s winning Powerball numbers are…………”

As a guy, its an unspoken law to alert your partner before you come.

Don’t blow into the vagina. Ever.

If you fart whilst receiving a blow job and she keeps going like nothing happened, you are required to buy her something shiny and valuable.

Take a pee after sex, it will help prevent infections.

One does not just “oops” it in the backdoor.

I'm owed something shiny and valuable

So am I!

I also want someone to find the patch for the glitch in the first one.

Ball gag

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"50% of the time a woman saying “don’t stop I’m about to come” will make you come and ruin her orgasm. This a cruel glitch that hasn’t yet been patched.

Wash your genitals.

Dot lie about being on the pill.

The difference between “fetish” and “felony” is checking beforehand.

If you’re using anal beads do not pull them out and say “and tonight’s winning Powerball numbers are…………”

As a guy, its an unspoken law to alert your partner before you come.

Don’t blow into the vagina. Ever.

If you fart whilst receiving a blow job and she keeps going like nothing happened, you are required to buy her something shiny and valuable.

Take a pee after sex, it will help prevent infections.

One does not just “oops” it in the backdoor.

How do you not stop doing a bj if a guy farts ? I would be laughing "

It happened to me at a high end sex party and I had to pull my head away, the fast smelled...but the guy's wife kept going at it. True love aah

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By *tingly Byron OP Man
over a year ago

In a town Fab forgot

If you fart whilst receiving a blow job and she keeps going like nothing happened, you are required to buy her something shiny and valuable.

Any guidance on farting when the roles are reversed?

Blame the cat/dog/penguin.

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By *hoenixAdAstraWoman
over a year ago

Hiding in the shadows

If you fart whilst receiving a blow job and she keeps going like nothing happened, you are required to buy her something shiny and valuable.

Any guidance on farting when the roles are reversed?

Blame the cat/dog/penguin.

Urmmmmm

Why would the cat/dog/penguin be present while I had a guy munching my minge?

What kind of pervert do you think I am Stingers?

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By *dam1971Man
over a year ago

Bedford

If you fart whilst receiving a blow job and she keeps going like nothing happened, you are required to buy her something shiny and valuable.

Any guidance on farting when the roles are reversed?

Blame the cat/dog/penguin.

Urmmmmm

Why would the cat/dog/penguin be present while I had a guy munching my minge?

What kind of pervert do you think I am Stingers?

Do NOT answer out loud

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"50% of the time a woman saying “don’t stop I’m about to come” will make you come and ruin her orgasm. This a cruel glitch that hasn’t yet been patched.

Wash your genitals.

Dot lie about being on the pill.

The difference between “fetish” and “felony” is checking beforehand.

If you’re using anal beads do not pull them out and say “and tonight’s winning Powerball numbers are…………”

As a guy, its an unspoken law to alert your partner before you come.

Don’t blow into the vagina. Ever.

If you fart whilst receiving a blow job and she keeps going like nothing happened, you are required to buy her something shiny and valuable.

Take a pee after sex, it will help prevent infections.

One does not just “oops” it in the backdoor.

How do you not stop doing a bj if a guy farts ? I would be laughing "

I think it's what's referred to as profesionalism

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If she suggests anal for the first time, politely decline unless you know the room is clear of strap ons

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By *tingly Byron OP Man
over a year ago

In a town Fab forgot

If you fart whilst receiving a blow job and she keeps going like nothing happened, you are required to buy her something shiny and valuable.

Any guidance on farting when the roles are reversed?

Blame the cat/dog/penguin.

Urmmmmm

Why would the cat/dog/penguin be present while I had a guy munching my minge?

What kind of pervert do you think I am Stingers?

Do NOT answer out loud

Answers. Going. Round. In. My head.

Must...

Not........

Speakkkkkkkkk.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Take your bloody socks off!

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By *uke olovingmanMan
over a year ago

Gravesend

"Take your bloody socks off! "
keep your socks on lol

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By *erby DomCouple
over a year ago

Ashbourne(ish) and Chesterfield(ish)

It's considered bad form to wipe your cock on her curtains after the act.

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By *dam1971Man
over a year ago

Bedford

"It's considered bad form to wipe your cock on her curtains after the act."

Really? It’s political correctness gone mad!

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By *nabelle21Woman
over a year ago

B38

"If she suggests anal for the first time, politely decline unless you know the room is clear of strap ons

PMSL...no wait I've squirted

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Talking of strap-ons. Don't leave the strap-on out and if you do make sure it's had a good rinse.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When she's sucking your cock don't say "Dip DIP! Potatoe chip!" When she bobs her head up and down ... It'll make her laugh uncontrollably.

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By *tingly Byron OP Man
over a year ago

In a town Fab forgot

"It's considered bad form to wipe your cock on her curtains after the act."

The correct term for this is "zuffle".

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By *adeiteWoman
over a year ago

Stafford

Don't pull out anal beads like you're staying a lawn mower either

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By *tingly Byron OP Man
over a year ago

In a town Fab forgot

"If you’re using anal beads do not pull them out and say “and tonight’s winning Powerball numbers are…………”

You spoil all my fun

Did I make you laugh?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Take your bloody socks off! "
can I keep my sliders on?

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