FabSwingers.com forum: How nasty are ppl on here?!

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Only been on here a week or two and am starting to have serious doubts i want to remain here. Had a man add me on msn i havent listed camming as something i am into so when he asked i said no dont do it. He got all abusive so found himself blocked,just vented my rage in my profile and had a couple mail me slagging me off....wtf! It also states i'm straight so why even contact me in the 1st place but to then slate me,i responded politely i might add to which their one line response was" shut up you stupid little slut".... nice!!!

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By *adchickCouple
over a year ago

Cyprus

"Only been on here a week or two and am starting to have serious doubts i want to remain here. Had a man add me on msn i havent listed camming as something i am into so when he asked i said no dont do it. He got all abusive so found himself blocked,just vented my rage in my profile and had a couple mail me slagging me off....wtf! It also states i'm straight so why even contact me in the 1st place but to then slate me,i responded politely i might add to which their one line response was" shut up you stupid little slut".... nice!!!"

Welcome to the world of read and block!

And this is why so many of us won't reply to all mail.

Don't add msn for those who haven't had the decency to ask you first.

Change your profile. You will always get numpties wandering through the single females (and couples for that matter) and contacting you because there is something about your profile they don't like.

It is TOO harsh and will put a huge amount of people off.

As for the idiots........ ignore them, block them, they soon get the message.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Words on a screen...ignore it, you need a tough skin round here so its best to laugh at them for being pathetic and move your attention onto the hundreds of lovely people here xx

could be worse, you could be a single male...and they would have got totally slated for posting a winge thread

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By *adchickCouple
over a year ago

Cyprus

"Words on a screen...ignore it, you need a tough skin round here so its best to laugh at them for being pathetic and move your attention onto the hundreds of lovely people here xx

could be worse, you could be a single male...and they would have got totally slated for posting a winge thread

Women don't whinge.......

We make informed and culturally significant statements!

All Hail the Pussy Posse!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We have to agree about the profile, it is far to nasty, and will put a lot of people,..[even men] off

,...and dont let it get to you, as soon as you see the words `lets cam` delete, simple as that, and move on

S&A

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By *leasureDomeMan
over a year ago

all over the place

to the op ....its not on ....if anyone is abusive to you report the abuser they do not deserve to be on here

mr X

ohh except the pussy posse when babbling on about men. They are exempt ...we simply ignore them

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm sorry you had a response like that, we have been on about 6 weeks and genuinely have not had any abuse or had a problem when we've said no thanx, hope you don't leave cos that will be a shame. Majority of people are nice, friendly, sexy people. Good Luck XX

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By *adchickCouple
over a year ago

Cyprus

"to the op ....its not on ....if anyone is abusive to you report the abuser they do not deserve to be on here

mr X

ohh except the pussy posse when babbling on about men. They are exempt ...we simply ignore them

Thats only cus we talk sense and you lot can't understand logic, meaning and good old fashioned truth!

ppppppppppffffffffffffff

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

welcome to fabs.... ignore all nasty mail, dont even waste yr time replying... they soon get bored... after all its us women who are in charge lol

right girls ??

;-)

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By *adchickCouple
over a year ago

Cyprus

"welcome to fabs.... ignore all nasty mail, dont even waste yr time replying... they soon get bored... after all its us women who are in charge lol

right girls ??

;-)"

All hail the two newest members of the Pussy Posse!!!!

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By *leasureDomeMan
over a year ago

all over the place

yeah pretend cock on the way ...enjoy .....

pmsl

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yeah.. your right..

Nice tits though... Gotta be said...

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By *leasureDomeMan
over a year ago

all over the place

cant fault you there !

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

notts2for2 how did u get over 20 pics on yr profile??

and whos tits are u on about, ? if its mine thanx, if not, i;l feel a fool lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

and ive felt a few fools in my time lol

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By *leasureDomeMan
over a year ago

all over the place

phew if they meant someone else trust me yours are tasty too

MR X

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think all the women on here have nice tits by the looks of it so it could be any of us, what do you think?? K

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

yep agreed, some yummy boobies about

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By *leasureDomeMan
over a year ago

all over the place

yeah even mine aren't too bad ...coming along nicely ....

mr x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We would need photographic evidence obviously K

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

all hail the boobie babes oops sorry the pussy posse

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"all hail the boobie babes oops sorry the pussy posse "

u called lol

yeh ther ae a few lets say idiots on here but you get that every were dont you

just block them an be done with it

its their loss at the end of the day

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

block and delete!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

People can be nasty on here, but then again they can also be nasty in real life. All you do is block them and forget about it.

Moaning about it on the forums ?? Bad move.

Generating a nasty profile ??? another bad move

Stating that you're not sure if you want to stay on this site or not ??? Well what are you wanting folks to say ?? "Please stay, don't leave ?" That aint going to happen - don't slam the door when you leave and remember to turn out the light.

Alternatively of course, you can stop moaning, get shot of your nasty profile, and start to have some fun

The choice is all yours really

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

you'll find most people on here are nice so long as everythings going their way, soon as you don't want to meet them or not get your tits out for them on cam they get all abusive, look at it like this its best to find out now they wankers rather that in the middle of a meet

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We very much agree with what others have said, apart from the people telling you to ignore it, don’t ignore it, report it and block the person/s involved and help make this site a better place.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I was on about the original poster as it goes... trying to be flippant, unlike me i know..

In saying that.. your all right though... some lovely boobies about...

Xxxxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"notts2for2 how did u get over 20 pics on yr profile??

and whos tits are u on about, ? if its mine thanx, if not, i;l feel a fool lol

xx"

Shhhh Will get them spotted... then more shares will be needed to keep em.. but got them on before the new rules... and the new very very kind, sexy adorable and obviously tastful owners have let them stay..

so far lol.....

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By *habsMan
over a year ago

Fortress of Solitude, Middlesex

Is it possible some numpties actually feel they have a right to throw insults at one and hopefully not expect some challenge or come back? How brave - something they wouldn't dare in reality no doubt, hiding behind the safety of their computer monitor.

So, I say, report and sooner or later they will find no matter what sites they go on, they keep getting banned - maybe then the penny will drop?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Is it possible some numpties actually feel they have a right to throw insults at one and hopefully not expect some challenge or come back? How brave - something they wouldn't dare in reality no doubt, hiding behind the safety of their computer monitor.

So, I say, report and sooner or later they will find no matter what sites they go on, they keep getting banned - maybe then the penny will drop?

_habs my gorgeous friend *waves* not seen ya on ere b4 good to see ya posting

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

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By *ton DiamondWoman
over a year ago

Slough/Windsor

Pah.... keyboard warriors.... Block Delete NEXT!!??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

we have sadly had abusive messages left luckily i have the hyde of a rhino so i just ignore um easiest way

report it like _habs said they might actually learn to behave if not then they aren't the sort we want within the swingin community then r they

simples

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

LOL I've only been here a couple of weeks - but since discovering the block button - its my new favourite toy! Some guys (and couples come to that) are just plain rude. I'm just lucky that I have a thick skin - or maybe I'm just thick!!! Still for all the idiots - I've come across some true genuine people who far outweight the numpties!!

Loving the strong women on this site - long may you rule!

Michelle

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By *hemadcoupleCouple
over a year ago

cardiff

"notts2for2 how did u get over 20 pics on yr profile??

and whos tits are u on about, ? if its mine thanx, if not, i;l feel a fool lol

so far lol....."

What new rules? And why have a restriction on numbers of pics you can post anyway? Nine isn't that many really, though some may think it's ample, which is fine.

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By *orkshiremonkey1Man
over a year ago

Worksop

An admirable sentiment.... but block and delete doesn't work for those ignorant sods who can't even say "thanks but no thanks" to a perfectly polite mail asking if they are up to try moving on to a possible meeting.

I too have a very thick skin and will say what's what even to peoples faces and think sod them, they deserved it. However, there is no excuse for ignorance and too many people on this sort of site get away with it. I do follow up a deleted mailing with a questioning one. I have I admit had a few responses to these follow-ups but most continue to ignore. Why is this? Not as if it costs anything or a great deal of time to reply with those four little words.

Answers on a postcard please

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"An admirable sentiment.... but block and delete doesn't work for those ignorant sods who can't even say "thanks but no thanks" to a perfectly polite mail asking if they are up to try moving on to a possible meeting.

Answers on a postcard please"

unfortunatly a follow up mail to ignored 1 is why many dont reply to the first, because in our experience alot of thanks but no thanks mail we have had to send (mainly because people havnt read our profile so dont realise they dont fit what we are looking for) are followed up with abuse or begging.

anyway thats not what this thread is about there are loads of threads on replying to mail.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Answers on a postcard please"

If you've read this thread you'll already know the answers, everyone gets emails ignored, even couples, what is ignorant though is the fact that people cannot see that a no reply is a no thanks.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Answers on a postcard please"

Let me get this straight, if somebody deletes a mail without replyuing you pm them again to ask why?? I would have thought deleting it would be a clue taht they mean no? As for following it up, you say some people do reply, out of interest has anybody ever replied positively?

To be honest that makes you sound like a stalker.

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By *orkshiremonkey1Man
over a year ago

Worksop

Sorry I don't agree..... just that it's polite to respond..... I you messaged me and I deleted would you not want to know why?

If you spoke to me at a meeting we arranged and I ignored you, would you not wonder why?

Manners thats all..... but many don't seem to agree...... Just my point I suppose !!!!!

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By *orkshiremonkey1Man
over a year ago

Worksop

I did think of responding ion private but that would contradict what I put about speaking my mind. I should like to point out I am not a stalker just like someone with an ounce of decency and manners

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By *ton DiamondWoman
over a year ago

Slough/Windsor

"Sorry I don't agree..... just that it's polite to respond..... I you messaged me and I deleted would you not want to know why?

If you spoke to me at a meeting we arranged and I ignored you, would you not wonder why?

Manners thats all..... but many don't seem to agree...... Just my point I suppose !!!!! "

If i messaged you and you either ignored or deleted id think "Jeez im glad he didnt bother replying what did i want to chat to a plum like that for anyway?!" and move on... Id certainly not follow up my message with a 2nd message to find out why the 1st was ignored.

Manners are free but so are opinions and choice.

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By *orkshiremonkey1Man
over a year ago

Worksop

But on the other hand.... manners cost nothing and there are those who seem to think that name calling is ok too. Read the note re "badmouthing"... it's at the top of the page.

Also choice and opinion is free..... we are all entitled to them.... I choose to show I do have manners and would never ignore anyone messaging me.

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By *orkshiremonkey1Man
over a year ago

Worksop

Wanders off Pooh Bear-like pondering again...... humming a little tune

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By *ton DiamondWoman
over a year ago

Slough/Windsor

"Wanders off Pooh Bear-like pondering again...... humming a little tune"

Im with you on that and the manners thing... I just dont bother shouting about it anymore.

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By *aradisecplCouple
over a year ago

bristol

If u dont want all the hassle why have such a long friends list .. possibly many of them are timewasters and fakes just talk in chatroom and dont add ..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you don't get a reply is that not telling you something ????

Perhaps the recipient of your message is just not interested. If you replied to me with a 'questioning' email, that would also go unanswered and you'd then be blocked ....

Get the picture ?? No one is ENTITLED to a reply to anything

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have started actually replying to the single guys who message us, politly asking them whether they have read our profile before messaging us, its funny really because then they dont reply lol

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By *orkshiremonkey1Man
over a year ago

Worksop

Well there you go..... If they haven't replied it's because they haven't read the profile...... also helps if people put what they want on the profile..... and therefore shouldn't complain if the male section is displayed......

Just a matter of crossing the "i's" and dotting the "t's"..... I know it's wrong before anyone says so

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago

So, I say, report and sooner or later they will find no matter what sites they go on, they keep getting banned - maybe then the penny will drop?

Hiya Ahabs nice to see you on here xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Well there you go..... If they haven't replied it's because they haven't read the profile...... also helps if people put what they want on the profile..... and therefore shouldn't complain if the male section is displayed......

Just a matter of crossing the "i's" and dotting the "t's"..... I know it's wrong before anyone says so"

Just because someone might meet single males doesn’t mean they want to meet every one on the site or that they meet 24/7, your are sending a message to a profile, not an ad, think some people forget that we are limited to 100 messages in a day so if you they are looking why should people waste them on people they don’t wish to meet.

If it concerns you that much post in ideas and suggestions and ask for a no thanks button for emails, rather than moan all over the forums, because moaning wont help with YOUR problem.

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By *adchickCouple
over a year ago

Cyprus

"But on the other hand.... manners cost nothing and there are those who seem to think that name calling is ok too. Read the note re "badmouthing"... it's at the top of the page.

Also choice and opinion is free..... we are all entitled to them.... I choose to show I do have manners and would never ignore anyone messaging me. "

Exactly...... choice and opinion.

Many of use CHOSE not to reply. Many of us are of the OPINION that not replying is a dam sight easier than the abuse we get when we turn someone down.

You can't have double standards on here.

You either believe in CHOICE and OPINION and you allow everyone to have those....... or you don't. So stop being a hypocrite.

By the way.......... asking 'why' when you've been deleted is creepy and to be honest..... you sound scary.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Manners and courtesy cost nothing!!

When I first joined I did reply to every message even if it was to say 'no thanks, not interetsed'. Have to say the majority of people that I did that too came back with a 'thanks for the reply, wish you well' message.

However, the ones that don't take the time to read profiles, criteria or just come on here to perv the photos are usually the ones that are abusive when you turn them down...so good to have the report, block and delete options - lol!

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By *ton DiamondWoman
over a year ago

Slough/Windsor

"Manners and courtesy cost nothing!!

I have to say this is exactly as my own experience has been: i will reply to all, the few who question my motive are simply confirming my initial decision.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Got to say exactly our own opinion too... If they seem to have at least taken time to read and reply we do too...

If not read though.. or a really tacky cut and paste.. Nope!

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By *adchickCouple
over a year ago

Cyprus

"Got to say exactly our own opinion too... If they seem to have at least taken time to read and reply we do too...

If not read though.. or a really tacky cut and paste.. Nope! "

Exactly...... I've just had a black gentlemen contact us......

I will only play with white.... it quite clearly states it on our profile.

deleted.........blocked.......... he obviously can't read!

The same as 99% of single males who contact us!

Why do they deserve a reply????????

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By *orkshiremonkey1Man
over a year ago

Worksop

Ok.... I am always willing to listen to and take someone elses point on board..... but inferring that someone sounds creepy because they want to know why they are being ignored is downright rude. None of the people responding to this part of the thread almost without exception has any idea of what I might be like in person. I may not be Gods gift but I deserve as much respect as the next person or persons.

Also I do not look down on anyone within this lifestyle or see myself as being "up my own backside" as some do appear to be obviously doing. I will mix with anyone from any background, ethnicity or upbringing and I would be as polite as I was brought up to be. Just looking at a picture on the site and reading a few words cannot readily convince anyone that a person is not worth even the decency of a response.

I will repeat my statement made earlier, it takes very little time to say thanks but no thanks and that manners cost nothing...... after all as the saying goes, Manners maketh the man or (for equalities sakes) woman.

Finally, I know that the majority of people involved with this thread do not hold with my ideas but as previously said by someone else, this is my opinion and it's also my choice to ask why I'm being ignored. I expect that I have rubbed many people up the wrong way, hey, it's a free world to some degree and if I chose to put the preverbial cat amongst the pigeons, I will do so but not get "pissy" about others voiced opinions either......

(continues to wander and ponder, still humming that little tune)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

" Just looking at a picture on the site and reading a few words cannot readily convince anyone that a person is not worth even the decency of a response.

Actually it can.

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By *orkshiremonkey1Man
over a year ago

Worksop

"But on the other hand.... manners cost nothing and there are those who seem to think that name calling is ok too. Read the note re "badmouthing"... it's at the top of the page.

Also choice and opinion is free..... we are all entitled to them.... I choose to show I do have manners and would never ignore anyone messaging me.

Exactly...... choice and opinion.

Many of use CHOSE not to reply. Many of us are of the OPINION that not replying is a dam sight easier than the abuse we get when we turn someone down.

You can't have double standards on here.

You either believe in CHOICE and OPINION and you allow everyone to have those....... or you don't. So stop being a hypocrite.

By the way.......... asking 'why' when you've been deleted is creepy and to be honest..... you sound scary.

Ok..... everyone has an opinion and maybe there is a little hypocracy here, but who can hold up their hands and say they aren't to some degree? We all agree to terms and conditions when signing up for these sites and your opinion of me is valid to you, but not under those terms and conditions. My ire is generalised and not personally directed at anyone as your statement is. I am promoting freedom of choice and opinion in pursuing healthy discussion..... you have the right to disagree with MY thoughts and words, as do I yours.

No one likes to be shot down in flames in any form but I ask "why should I be ignored?" Don't I have the right to ask why?

(humming and meandering does wind people up doesn't it Pooh thought to himself whimsically)

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By *orkshiremonkey1Man
over a year ago

Worksop

Like to elaborate on that without taking any previous statements into consideration? Can you truly be objective in your elaboration?

(Pooh wonders again if there'll be honey at the end of the path)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I can appreciate what your saying northernman, but I guess the bottom line is if your a woman/cpl getting maybe 30 - 50 messages a day, just the time needed to answer them all would be a pain. While the delete button is not the most polite way I agree, it is the most practicle and it does send a little signal I feel also that tells you...er...'no thanks not for me/us'

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Honey here! the only thing im going to add to this is that you are more than entitled to ask why your messages have been ignored....and those that you have asked are more than entitled not to reply,its very simple really and to ponder too much will send you round the bend

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Give it a rest will you, the majority of people who HAVE ignored you probably dont even use the forums, the minority that do use the forums will probably start ignoring you after all your gibbering arrogant tosh and whining.

So when you next feel the need to wander around humming, take your bloody keyboard with you.

You might be sick to death of people ignoring the emails you send out, but making everyone sick to death of you whinging wont help in the slightest, especially so when its being aimed towards people you probably haven't even mailed in the first place.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

yet another post thats ended up slating ppl for not replying.... i only ever reply to some one if im interested.... i cant be assed to start typing thanx but no thanx to every message i get, ive got better things to do with my time.. like chat to the one im interested in...lol

I would never ever mail someone a 2nd time if i didnt get a reply....for one, they obviously arn't interested in me, so i aint gonna sound desperate for mailing them again...

so what u didnt get a reply, get over it and move on.

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By *leasureDomeMan
over a year ago

all over the place

@ northermonkey....quote..I will repeat my statement made earlier, it takes very little time to say thanks but no thanks and that manners cost nothing.....

----------------------------------

what you do not understand is some people-women -couples get 80+ posts a day from people who have not even read the profile and just send generic spam requests "for a fuck"...

i have to agree ...joining the site does not have to obligate you to respond to every post no mater how well meaning or eloquent the sender.....

MR X

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By *orkshiremonkey1Man
over a year ago

Worksop

"Give it a rest will you, the majority of people who HAVE ignored you probably dont even use the forums, the minority that do use the forums will probably start ignoring you after all your gibbering arrogant tosh and whining.

So when you next feel the need to wander around humming, take your bloody keyboard with you.

I shall continue to gibber and be arrogant (your opinion) if it continues to wind YOU up..... again, you don't know me from Adam and as such are reading the threads I have posted from a subjective perspective..... maybe you are a culprit of the on-going debate, ones who ignore a polite, well meaning and descriptive message from someone like myself? Could that be why you react with such obvious gusto? These are not statements made and directed at you personally..... just questions that I have pondered over while reading the response. As only 2 members of this site have verified me from meetings, why not ask them what I'm like? Or members from another site that I frequent..... I think you will find that arrogance is not part of the descriptive response you will get. Straight-forward, confident and plain speaking, yes.... but some may consider that as arrogance I feel.

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By *heAddamsCouple
over a year ago

corbridge

Our tuppeny's worth:-

We have a line on our profile saying we may be willing to consider an exceptional single male, but we would need more than a one line response.

We got this last week:

"genuine guy 35 near cramlington, 100% genuine, get in touch (phone number)"

The arrogance was so breathtaking (not even "please get in touch"!) that we did in fact reply,asking whether he had actually read our profile.

Guess what?

No reply!!

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By *orkshiremonkey1Man
over a year ago

Worksop

Ok.... again... point taken..... I do not, however, as you put it sent spam requests "for a fuck"...... I enjoy the social side of the scene and am not a "bedhead notch" collector.... I feel (again my opinion) that conversation having a laugh etc is all part of the experience..... those individuals who send crass messages as you refer to may, acceptably be not worthy of a response but a message that obviously describes and requests a response should be worthy of a polite no thanks if that person is not what the recipient is wanting...... I tend to try reading the profile listed and not approach those not requesting the attention of males...... So Mr X, obligation is not the intent of my thinking. That would be manners and that is lacking I feel......

(should I continue to wander or stop for a little snack on my reserve of honey in this jar I have here?)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

very interesting thread today..

I receive so many cut and paste messages, and choose do delete without reply..my main reason...??

If a man/cpl/woman cant be othered to read my profile to find out my name and addres me accordingly...then why are they worth my time getting a responce??

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By *edhot4blkCouple
over a year ago

York/London/Crantock

I'm gonna keep out of this one i'll only end up getting shouted at..lmao

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By *orkshiremonkey1Man
over a year ago

Worksop

"Our tuppeny's worth:-

We have a line on our profile saying we may be willing to consider an exceptional single male, but we would need more than a one line response.

We got this last week:

"genuine guy 35 near cramlington, 100% genuine, get in touch (phone number)"

The arrogance was so breathtaking (not even "please get in touch"!) that we did in fact reply,asking whether he had actually read our profile.

Guess what?

No reply!!"

Here is a classic example of what is meant by not reading a profile..... the person in question may have thought that 2 lines would be adequate..... I think not !!! A proper response would be what you would have received from me even though my profile gives some idea of my intentions. Rightfully so you questioned the message send and didn't respond (in your mind).... I wouldn't dare send anything of that nature..... I do tend to take time in creating an approach to a prospective meet. Just as I would if I was actually meeting "real-time"... having pride of appearence online is as important as offline...

Perhaps I should backtrack a little and refine my initial thinking and statement (I may be willing to take back some of my words here so watch carefully)......

"The question is that if a decently worded and lengthy message describing someone who meets the criteria of a members needs, why do some recipients not respond even to say "thanks but no thanks"?". And if that message is not responded to, could I be "out of order" in following up the initial message with another asking as to why there has been no response?"

A more defined statement made as a question? Mmmmm maybe I didn't take that much back after all.....

(Pooh, now sated on honey, continued down the wandering path, wondering how the Tao of Pooh Bear would sound in Gaelic?)

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By *orkshiremonkey1Man
over a year ago

Worksop

"I'm gonna keep out of this one i'll only end up getting shouted at..lmao"

No shouting from me..... I was in the wrong not you.... I did respond to you making that point

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By *edhot4blkCouple
over a year ago

York/London/Crantock

monk i didnt mean being shouted at by u hun i meant being shouted at by others in general...

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By *orkshiremonkey1Man
over a year ago

Worksop

"monk i didnt mean being shouted at by u hun i meant being shouted at by others in general..."

No problem.... I did send you a message a while back and got my "knickers in a twist" over the reply..... I clearly didn't read the profile description correctly, but I stand by part of what I did say in my response to the reply...... thats an email address not my MSN messanger..... and since then I have reviewed my profile listing too.

Regards

Chris

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I shall continue to gibber and be arrogant (your opinion) if it continues to wind YOU up..... again, you don't know me from Adam and as such are reading the threads I have posted from a subjective perspective..... maybe you are a culprit of the on-going debate, ones who ignore a polite, well meaning and descriptive message from someone like myself? Could that be why you react with such obvious gusto? These are not statements made and directed at you personally..... just questions that I have pondered over while reading the response. As only 2 members of this site have verified me from meetings, why not ask them what I'm like? Or members from another site that I frequent..... I think you will find that arrogance is not part of the descriptive response you will get. Straight-forward, confident and plain speaking, yes.... but some may consider that as arrogance I feel. "

Not winding us up, although you may think you are, partly the reason arrogance was mentioned, we’re not the ones moaning that we’re getting ignored, is that why your craving attention in the forums, to make up for being ignored via email?

But just for your information we tend to reply to nearly all the mail we get, however you demanding that people must reply to your emails and suggesting that if they don’t that they don’t have any manners is just being silly… hence the reason we posted on here, do you reply to all the junk mail that pops through your letter box?

Just because a couple might meet single men doesn’t mean they have to meet or reply to every single male who emails them even if YOU think they should.

Like we said before, if you have a problem with not getting replies, put in a suggestion for a no thanks button or similar, although we have now done this, as it seems your not interested in any advice given and more interested in moaning.

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By *leasureDomeMan
over a year ago

all over the place

"monk i didnt mean being shouted at by u hun i meant being shouted at by others in general..."

at you ....nahhhhhhhhh ...your a pussycat .....

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By *leasureDomeMan
over a year ago

all over the place

@ northernmonkey

as you said earlier to someone, the cut paste comment was not intended at you specifically, but can you imagine getting 50 a day or more and having to respond ...

So ok, in your opinion its bad manners not to reply ...fine ...you are entitled to your opinion.

But you can not expect everyone to have the same life plan or personal viewpoint as you ,yeah some will and those are people you gravitate to.

But the majority ..after a few weeks of replying and getting abuse back or asked aggressively for an explanation as to why not,they give up ... and personally i do not blame them

MR X

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

And life has got so much easier now for me to mass delete males...whoops sorry mails from those I am not interested in. How cool is that

thanks admin lol

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By *orkshiremonkey1Man
over a year ago

Worksop

"@ northernmonkey

as you said earlier to someone, the cut paste comment was not intended at you specifically, but can you imagine getting 50 a day or more and having to respond ...

So ok, in your opinion its bad manners not to reply ...fine ...you are entitled to your opinion.

But you can not expect everyone to have the same life plan or personal viewpoint as you ,yeah some will and those are people you gravitate to.

But the majority ..after a few weeks of replying and getting abuse back or asked aggressively for an explanation as to why not,they give up ... and personally i do not blame them

MR X"

I don't expect everyone to have the same "lifeplan" or "personal viewpoint" as me...... I do however believe in manners but a gravitation towards those with the same beliefs does not and will not occur..... I abhore the concept of the "clique". I like to think I enjoy a unique perspective(we are all unique afterall) that encompasses many differing ideas and opinions...... but I adhere to my standpoint re lack of manners. Yes, I am being somewhat dogged and stubborn, but I was socialised into believing that manners were important in life, whatever the situation.

I understand the amount of messages the more "popular" members get can be numerous and would take time to reply to each one. Do you read each and every one you receive? Which ones attract your attention? The insight would be useful to those amongst us who consider themselves genuine members of the site.

So honestly, with hand on heart, you don't think it's bad manners to respond to a well written and polite request for a meeting or contact to move towards such? Also, there is never any aggression in any request made for an explanation of a lack of response made by myself, just a polite request, a nudge if you like, prompting re my initial message.

I look forward to the reply

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i'd just like to ad , my mother brought me up well, and i am extremely well mannered, but like i said a thousand times, i will not reply to anyone im not interested in.....(so does that mean i'm rude and ignorant bla bla bla ) as mr x says, some of us get tons of mail a day, i aint gonna start replying to them saying no.... no reply means no,,, and im sure most people on here know that.

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By *leasureDomeMan
over a year ago

all over the place

i really do not think about it to be honest .i am not worried about the ones that do not reply ...it simply wasnt meant to be .....i concern myself with the ones that do respond or approach me .

I normally always respond ...but i do not think its bad manners of people who do not ...and if people message who have clearly not read the profile ....why should i or anyone else bother .?

With some of the stunts i have read on here ..i am surprised any woman or couple responds to anything....its harsh but hey life wasnt meant to be easy ...

Good manners dont cost anything ...but many get abuse as some guys take a no as a personal slur and personal attack

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By *orkshiremonkey1Man
over a year ago

Worksop

Just because a couple might meet single men doesn’t mean they have to meet or reply to every single male who emails them even if YOU think they should.

Firstly, I would like to applaud you for the tendency to reply to most mails.... It is heartening to find people that still do...

Secondly, I am not "craving attention" as you put it. I just would like to outline my thoughts on the matter..... Afterall, isn't that what forums are for? To air opinion and make suggestions. I'm not demanding that "people must reply to my emails" and certainly not insisting that members "reply to every single male who emails". Nor am I arrogant.... I can safely hold up my hand and say that almost without contradiction, there is no one involved with these threads, knows me either chat room wise or personally. I can almost hear the cries of "no and I wont be getting to know you either" but if you consider the people I have "met" within this social scene would say that I'm confident and forthright in manner and speech. This can be seen by some as "arrogance" or "aggression" I suppose but it is not in my case I can assure you. Some people just don't like that either !!!!

Also I'm not worried re the fact that I don't "get replies", just that people seem ignorant to the fact that someone has taken time to compose a message describing them and hoping that they meet the criteria to some or all degrees of the recipients needs. The lack of response makes me wonder what some people actually want from this social scene.

The fact I read that you have made a suggestion re a "no thanks" button is just what I feel is needed. It is a response of sorts and better all round than a lack of reply.

The advice you refer to was offered in a manner that I would be less likely to take on board than if offer in a more objective manner however, I do acknowledge the fact that you have offered advice and would like the opportunity to thank you for that.

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By *orkshiremonkey1Man
over a year ago

Worksop

"i'd just like to ad , my mother brought me up well, and i am extremely well mannered, but like i said a thousand times, i will not reply to anyone im not interested in.....(so does that mean i'm rude and ignorant bla bla bla ) as mr x says, some of us get tons of mail a day, i aint gonna start replying to them saying no.... no reply means no,,, and im sure most people on here know that."

Ok that said I would like to say I wouldn't be mailing you as I read the criteria set out in the profile...... I'm well out of your age range anyway.....

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By *orkshiremonkey1Man
over a year ago

Worksop

"i really do not think about it to be honest .i am not worried about the ones that do not reply ...it simply wasnt meant to be .....i concern myself with the ones that do respond or approach me .

I normally always respond ...but i do not think its bad manners of people who do not ...and if people message who have clearly not read the profile ....why should i or anyone else bother .?

With some of the stunts i have read on here ..i am surprised any woman or couple responds to anything....its harsh but hey life wasnt meant to be easy ...

Good manners dont cost anything ...but many get abuse as some guys take a no as a personal slur and personal attack

Fine .... accepted what you say.... but as I said, my opinion and it's different to yours..... I have to say we will have to agree to disagree.

On the point that those guys who take "no" as you describe, don't have a place on the site. What if the no came during a meet and they took that attitude? But that's a different matter.

Thanks for the response

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By *leasureDomeMan
over a year ago

all over the place

Ok that said I would like to say I wouldn't be mailing you as I read the criteria set out in the profile...... I'm well out of your age range anyway....."

i dont understand here ....what your real point is ...the post above was laying down her thoughts on why she does not reply and you have simply turned it into a personal "...well i would not post to you anyway..i am not in your age range "

which completely ignores her points ... ...i thought you just said wanted a to debate it and you were not arrogant ...?????

confused

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

I am still confused why a female stating sexuality as "straight" instantly means couples shouldn't contact them... or have I got the idea of swinging wrong?????

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

deep breaths and relax people

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

@ northernmonkey1

We’re not exactly sure what it is you want to hear from people on this thread, remember your replying to a profile which is not exactly a live ad, we have mailed people in the past and had no reply, that in itself is a no thanks, people have been honest and kind enough to tell you why they don’t always reply, abuse being the main cause, why email people if you get annoyed by not getting a reply? and no its not us being sarcastic, it’s a really genuine question, after all if someone wants to chat/meet you then they’ll contact you?

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By *orkshiremonkey1Man
over a year ago

Worksop

Ok that said I would like to say I wouldn't be mailing you as I read the criteria set out in the profile...... I'm well out of your age range anyway.....

which completely ignores her points ... ...i thought you just said wanted a to debate it and you were not arrogant ...?????

confused"

Which part of the point of it are you unsure of? I was making the point that I wouldn't contact this member because I was out of her age range and thereby showing I read profiles... It does not ignore any points at all...... And you say I'm arrogant?

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By *orkshiremonkey1Man
over a year ago

Worksop

Ok that said I would like to say I wouldn't be mailing you as I read the criteria set out in the profile...... I'm well out of your age range anyway.....

which completely ignores her points ... ...i thought you just said wanted a to debate it and you were not arrogant ...?????

confused

Oh and how was this made personal by the way?

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By *orkshiremonkey1Man
over a year ago

Worksop

"@ northernmonkey1

I made to statement that I thought members were ignorant for not responding to mailings...... I take on that there has been abuse, but is that a generalisation? Does every potential mailer become "tarred with the same brush"? Sometimes, as mentioned before, a second mail prompts a re-check of the "binned" mails and then, as I have experienced previously, a rethink as to why the initial mail was "overlooked". The "sit and wait" approach does not work..... Especially, if you are a lone male, being proactive is the way. Again my opinions and not those of the corporation

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"@ northernmonkey1

I think you may find that the 'make a nuisance of yourself' approach is also likely to have limited success

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By *leasureDomeMan
over a year ago

all over the place

Ok that said I would like to say I wouldn't be mailing you as I read the criteria set out in the profile...... I'm well out of your age range anyway.....

which completely ignores her points ... ...i thought you just said wanted a to debate it and you were not arrogant ...?????

confused

i questioned why you didnt respond to her points just the fact that you would not respond to her profile ...

how is that relevant to people who do not wish to respond for whatever reason ? ..it seemed a strange response when you had said you wanted to debate the issue...as it appeared you dismissed the opinion as it did not fit your own view...people have responded as to why some do, some dont ..all legitimate responses dont you agree ?

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By *orkshiremonkey1Man
over a year ago

Worksop

"@ northernmonkey1

I think you may find that the 'make a nuisance of yourself' approach is also likely to have limited success"

And how am I making a nuisance of myself?

Trying to inspire debate and come to a positive solution regarding the lack of a response to a perfectly polite and respectful mail is wrong? If so, how so?

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By *orkshiremonkey1Man
over a year ago

Worksop

Ok that said I would like to say I wouldn't be mailing you as I read the criteria set out in the profile...... I'm well out of your age range anyway.....

which completely ignores her points ... ...i thought you just said wanted a to debate it and you were not arrogant ...?????

confused

i questioned why you didnt respond to her points just the fact that you would not respond to her profile ...

Obviously, I must have confused you..... The point I made as was stated previously, was the reading of profiles...... simple..... the member you are referring to states on her profile, she has age specific criteria. Her points were taken onboard as everyones are, but not as you state, dismissed. The statement that was made was in relation to manners..... obviously, the person in question has stated "my mother brought me up well and I am extremely well mannered".... that is not at question..... the person has defined her choice criteria and also outlined she has no intention of replying to anyone she is not interested in....... That's not the debate issue ..... I wouldn't approach anyone who, in my reviewing of their profile, didn't wish for someone of my profile description to contact her.

The statement that "no reply means no" somehow I cannot see how that can be justified. Sorry but I don't agree.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Surely a "thanks but no thanks" button would come in handy so we cant just fire back an automated reply.

That way the forums can get back to fun n filth and not long boring debates about subjects that have been repeated again and again and again and again and again and again and again.

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By *leasureDomeMan
over a year ago

all over the place

but ..its nothing to do with what the original poster who started the thread is on about, which was abusive messages from rejected males ,,,,surely that answers most of your questions ?

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By *leasureDomeMan
over a year ago

all over the place

"Surely a "thanks but no thanks" button would come in handy so we cant just fire back an automated reply.

That way the forums can get back to fun n filth and not long boring debates about subjects that have been repeated again and again and again and again and again and again and again."

oooh your a hard bitch its not all Champagne and lasagne you know ...we have to get serious sometimes lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Surely a "thanks but no thanks" button would come in handy so we cant just fire back an automated reply.

That way the forums can get back to fun n filth and not long boring debates about subjects that have been repeated again and again and again and again and again and again and again.

oooh your a hard bitch its not all Champagne and lasagne you know ...we have to get serious sometimes lol

LMAO Droney you are up for such a spanking

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"The "sit and wait" approach does not work..... Especially, if you are a lone male, being proactive is the way."

Again with the best of intensions, being proactive includes joining in and getting known, posting on the forums, joining chat, maybe even attending socials, you started posting it the forums just to moan about others, that’s hardly being proactive, yes it might get you known, but sadly its for all the wrong reasons, as you said its your opinion and that’s all well and good, but if someone looks at your profile and doesn’t contact you or wont for that matter, then you contacting them wont change their mind.

Ask any successful single how they manage it, they will tell it how it is, but we'd hedge a bet that they'll say that you get out of swinging what your willing to put in.

Can we ask a serious question? who would you rather meet, the person that mails you that you've met face to face at a social and got on well with, or the person who sends a nice email you dont know.

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By *orkshiremonkey1Man
over a year ago

Worksop

"but ..its nothing to do with what the original poster who started the thread is on about, which was abusive messages from rejected males ,,,,surely that answers most of your questions ?"

How is that anything to do with the lack of manners of someone not replying to a perfectly reasonable and polite enquiry? Tiring of the bout? I agree that blokes who get rejected and then come back with abusive comments etc need dealing with in an appropriate manner..... being banned or suspension is not enough...... I however wished to broaden the topic.

This matter may have been discussed again and again but that's what a forum is for isn't it? Airing opinion and debating it... Check out the definition of the word

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't think being nasty is the exclusive territory of the single male..

Some people are nasty in all kinds of ways....

We have had nasty replies when politely declining mail from couples.. Several times from single guys everything from were prejudiced to racist.. and that was from a white fella ff's.. ok he was Irish so maybe he had some cause?? I dunno....

What surprises most though.. and even shocks sometimes is when people seem to get a kick from being nasty and obnoxious for no apparant reason other than just being so.. We usually find a touch of the jealousy is behind most cases..

Mike and Ju x

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By *orkshiremonkey1Man
over a year ago

Worksop

"The "sit and wait" approach does not work..... Especially, if you are a lone male, being proactive is the way.

Ask any successful single how they manage it, they will tell it how it is, but we'd hedge a bet that they'll say that you get out of swinging what your willing to put in.

Can we ask a serious question? who would you rather meet, the person that mails you that you've met face to face at a social and got on well with, or the person who sends a nice email you dont know.

OK... being proactive does include joining in and getting yourself known etc... agreed but as you put it "just to moan about others" is still being proactive..... as said before, this is an old subject but why has it not been addressed in a more thorough manner. I may be getting a name for being a right royal pain in the arse but I have made my thoughts known to a few people I would not have had the opportunity to converse with normally. As I have said before the concept of, and being part of a "clique" doesn't interest me. I'd rather be outside the "inner sanctuum" than in it.

Again, someone looking at a profile may not trigger a response but a thoughfully worded message may just tip the balance. Your thoughts on this welcomed..... I'm not a closed-minded person and will listen, then offer my own opinion, whether I agree or not.

Serious question....mmmm ok then..... Honestly, I would meet either.... new ground is exciting don't you think? But the comfort of someone you have met already is reassuring. If you weight the two up..... yes there are plus' for someone you have already met but on the other hand, surely most like new experiences?

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

"The "sit and wait" approach does not work..... Especially, if you are a lone male, being proactive is the way.

Ask any successful single how they manage it, they will tell it how it is, but we'd hedge a bet that they'll say that you get out of swinging what your willing to put in.

Can we ask a serious question? who would you rather meet, the person that mails you that you've met face to face at a social and got on well with, or the person who sends a nice email you dont know.

Brilliantly put, forums are full of banter just have a look at some of the posts and know its not cliquey all you have to do is respond to posts and people will start recognising your name and that your fun. Ive met quite a few people of the forums and site in general socially and yes ive played with my fair share but you have to build the foundations, unfortunatly people are more aprehensive of single guys, get your self known in a positive light, it wont come over night it may take a couple of months but you have to be patient.

Also it is impossible to answer all messages.xxkarenx

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By *orkshiremonkey1Man
over a year ago

Worksop

"I don't think being nasty is the exclusive territory of the single male..

Some people are nasty in all kinds of ways....

Mike and Ju x "

Well said re the nastiness...... It's not solely single males that fire that round.....

Anyone can be obnoxious but it takes something to get me to that point if at all. Jealousy could be a motivator.... who knows except those who do it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Also it is impossible to answer all messages.xxkarenx"

Speak for yourself... Pahhhhh. No troubles here lol...

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By *orkshiremonkey1Man
over a year ago

Worksop

"The "sit and wait" approach does not work..... Especially, if you are a lone male, being proactive is the way.

Ask any successful single how they manage it, they will tell it how it is, but we'd hedge a bet that they'll say that you get out of swinging what your willing to put in.

Can we ask a serious question? who would you rather meet, the person that mails you that you've met face to face at a social and got on well with, or the person who sends a nice email you dont know.

Also it is impossible to answer all messages.xxkarenx"

Firstly Karen, I think that answering all messages is not impossible.... impractical yes but not impossible.

I know that it doesn't come overnight and that working at it is the way to go as well as posting stuff and getting yourself known. Ok, I may be getting known negatively but I think I have a point where others don't...... everyone to there own !!!

I have to disagree with your statement that the forums aren't cliquey, even the chat rooms are, no offense meant.

I have also had my fair share of meets due to another site as well as with this one. Provoking members to rise up and slate me is not what I'm about..... FFS I can do that anywhere, just airing a view that's all.

Oh and no disrespect is meant to anyone throughout these exchanges. Also no animals were harmed

(Pooh Bear is still wandered and is now getting hacked off with it..... thinking about nicking a car now)

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

"The "sit and wait" approach does not work..... Especially, if you are a lone male, being proactive is the way.

Ask any successful single how they manage it, they will tell it how it is, but we'd hedge a bet that they'll say that you get out of swinging what your willing to put in.

Can we ask a serious question? who would you rather meet, the person that mails you that you've met face to face at a social and got on well with, or the person who sends a nice email you dont know.

Also it is impossible to answer all messages.xxkarenx

Firstly Karen, I think that answering all messages is not impossible.... impractical yes but not impossible.

I have to disagree with your statement that the forums aren't cliquey, even the chat rooms are, no offense meant.

Oh and no disrespect is meant to anyone throughout these exchanges. Also no animals were harmed

(Pooh Bear is still wandered and is now getting hacked off with it..... thinking about nicking a car now) "

I didnt say the chatrooms where not cliquey. But join in on the forums and have a laugh with us allxx

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago

I just popped in! I cant believe this mass debate is still going on!

Rock on guys :D

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Think i should kidnap Pooh before he gets himself into trouble......lol

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago

I think you should, pooh would'nt last 5 minutes in "nick" lol

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By *habsMan
over a year ago

Fortress of Solitude, Middlesex

Hiya Bouncies and HoneyPotCouple xxx

I had been a lurker for some 18 months (its free - what's the rush?) naively thinking setting up a profile and putting up pics of my polished back would get the ball rolling - alas, no pied piper effect!

Lol, anyways, enough lurking and time to get stuck in eh? Good to see you're all (wanted to say both, but there's 4 of you, including Andy and Rob that is) doing good and having fun xxx

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By *edhot4blkCouple
over a year ago

York/London/Crantock

"" humour needed ""

I know a song that will get on your nerves get on your nerves get on your nerves

2nd verce same as the first

I know a song that will get on your nerves get on your nerves get on your nerves

3rd verce same as the 1st and 2nd..no i better not..lmao

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Firstly Karen, I think that answering all messages is not impossible.... impractical yes but not impossible.

Ok I work on average a minumum 10 hours a day, plus commute, I try and get to the gym afew times a week and have a social life. Oh and fit some time in with MissD. I don't have that much spare time. So no it's not impossible, but to be honest setting aside time to reply to people I have no interest in is more than impractical, it's a waste of some of the precious little free time I have. I have pm's that interest me that remain unanswered because of lack of time, so no I'm not doing it and I'm not apologising for it.

People on this thread have commentted on getting upwards of 80 messages a day, allow a minute to reply thanks but no thanks and you are talking over an hour. Why should people do that??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

And there in lies your problem. There is nothing wrong with debate or disagreeing with people. I predominantly post on another site, 2 of the people that I have the upmost respect for on that site, are people that I very, very rarely see eye to eye on, on any serious issue. Indeed one of them is always one of the first people I seek out at a social. Thing is they respect my opinion. Where I personally struggle with your posts on this thread is that there is no hint whatsoever that anybody elses opinion may be valid or worth respecting or considering.

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By *orkshiremonkey1Man
over a year ago

Worksop

Where do I totally dismiss or disrespect anyone elses posts or position on the matter?

I have said over and over that I take on board what others have said but that I believe (please note the phrasing) that the issue is one of lack of manners. Ok your work situation plus commute leaves you little time respond, but what about the weekend? Does an hour to review messages and respond to those worthy of a response detract from your enjoyment of this scene? I agree, again as I have said before, that one liners asking "fancy a shag" or words to that effect are "bin-worthy".... that point I will relinquish. The point I am trying to make for clarities sake is that if someone sends you a well composed message, is it not bad manners to not respond if the sender is not to your liking, even if they fit your requirements. Would you honestly begrudge me that?

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By *orkshiremonkey1Man
over a year ago

Worksop

"I think you should, pooh would'nt last 5 minutes in "nick" lol"
7

Depends if "nick" was male or female don't you think?

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By *orkshiremonkey1Man
over a year ago

Worksop

"Think i should kidnap Pooh before he gets himself into trouble......lol"

Oh No!!!!

How could you think of kidnapping Pooh Bear? Loved by children of all ages.... you would break their poor little hearts......

(Pooh Bear wonders if he should carry the panga he used on Christopher Robin when Pooh found him stealing his fecking honey)

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By *leasureDomeMan
over a year ago

all over the place

so ...why cant you assume that no reply is simply a rejection of you as a potential partner ...why do you need the formality of rejection ...do you really need it wrapped up in meaningless niceties,does it make you feel better ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"so ...why cant you assume that no reply is simply a rejection of you as a potential partner ...why do you need the formality of rejection ...do you really need it wrapped up in meaningless niceties,does it make you feel better ?"

Yeah.... Honest lol.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well, I have found that people are always shocked that if i am sat at home and someone rings the doorbell that i dont get up to answer - unless i am expecting someone of course.

Its my door bell and i shall answer it as i wish.

The same goes for my mobile phone - it is constantly on silent (vibrate) mode and i answer messages and call people back when it is convienient to me.

Therefore why should the same not apply to ones inbox???

Yes of course if someone has constructed a well phrased message it would seem polite to answer - but if people really do get as many as 80 messages a day - i have to admit if we got that many we wouldnt be arsed to answer all them - you pick out the ones that catch your eye surely.

We have had a no thanks recently - and all we did was delete the message - should we then have responded to say thanks for the reply for the reply.....if you know what i mean !!

Its all up to the person recieving the message i think!

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By *orkshiremonkey1Man
over a year ago

Worksop

To assume makes an ass out of u and me.... Assumption does nothing to say that the recipient has or has not decided to consider a request.

Hypothetically, you apply for a job. There is no indication of whether all candidates get to know if or if not they are shortlisted. How long do you wait, hanging on past the closing date, wondering if you have to prepare for the interview, or do you be proactive and find out if you have been shortlisted for interview?

Ask yourself this - how does that make you feel? Would you really want to be put out of your misery?

Again, you walk into a shop, wanting to buy, let's say, a new TV. You have the cash sitting in your pocket, burning a hole in the lining. You see the ideal purchase and it's at a bargain price too. "Bonus" you think. You look around for an assistant to tell you would like to buy the TV. All there at the customer service desk. You think ok, and walk over. No one appears to notice you. "Excuse me, could I have some assistance please" you ask POLITELY. No answer came the stern reply..... bugger this you think and ask again this time a little more tersely. What happens next? Fill in the blanks and there's is my point..... If you get a response then Presto !!! You get the telly, if not then you would have walked out of the shop and gone elsewhere I presume. Or raised merry hell with the manager.

Now I'm not out to force anyone, nor do I make the presumption that everyone should respond to my messages (repeated again). I just would like some form of acknowledgement for the effort of making contact in the first place.... Even if it's "piss off"......

The analogy fit in my mind. Don't they? Consideration for the other party is sort of the point I am trying to make.

Is my standpoint so difficult to accept?

I accept you carry on so therefore why do you appear not to see where I'm coming from?

I suppose the point I'm trying to make is why does it appear that manners and graciousness are lacking? Many questions posed. And I know that at least one reply will be "piss off" lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"so ...why cant Is my standpoint so difficult to accept?

I accept you carry on so therefore why do you appear not to see where I'm coming from?

Sorry I editied your post to save space ......

The only thing that I would find difficult to accept is the fact that you hassle people if they fail to reply to your initial message. If they don't respond - move on for God's sake. It's not the end of the world. Why oh why oh why do you feel the need to have a post mortem.

I bet you appear on more peoples blocked list than anyone else on this site

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By *orkshiremonkey1Man
over a year ago

Worksop

quote "Yes of course if someone has constructed a well phrased message it would seem polite to answer - but if people really do get as many as 80 messages a day - i have to admit if we got that many we wouldnt be arsed to answer all them - you pick out the ones that catch your eye surely."

This is what I alluding to, exactly this above.... Ok as I have previously mentioned, 80 messages received is a lot but not all are not what the recipient is looking for or one liners surely? I consider my approaches to be reasonably well written and polite. But again that's my opinion. I would like to think that when I receive an approach, it would be of a similar content or nature. A "do u wanna fuck" seems crasss and impolite doesn't it? Or does it?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Its all up to the person recieving the message i think! x"

Yeah... well said lol.... Everyones different..

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By *orkshiremonkey1Man
over a year ago

Worksop

"so ...why cant Is my standpoint so difficult to accept?

I accept you carry on so therefore why do you appear not to see where I'm coming from?

Sorry I editied your post to save space ......

I bet you appear on more peoples blocked list than anyone else on this site"

No problem with the editing....

I would like to think that one follow-up is not "hassling people" and I agree that "it's not the end of the world". I do feel that it's poor form not to respond though.

Not in need of a post mortem just simply the use of manners. And I may appear on blocked lists more than anyone on the site but I hope you haven't put your house on it !! LOL

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Northernmonkey, can I ask if your sent mail has been read then deleted do you still send a follow up message?

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By *leasureDomeMan
over a year ago

all over the place

"so ...why cant you assume that no reply is simply

The analogy fit in my mind. Don't they? Consideration for the other party is sort of the point I am trying to make.

Is my standpoint so difficult to accept?

I accept you carry on so therefore why do you appear not to see where I'm coming from?

I suppose the point I'm trying to make is why does it appear that manners and graciousness are lacking? Many questions posed. And I know that at least one reply will be "piss off" lol"

i cut your response down like the previous poster ,but i did read and understand the points ...however this is not a shop its an online facility ..and on most online facilities you at best get an automated message...

An automated push off not interested button has been mentioned and requested in another thread . but if i and other people say "we have neither the time nor inclination,nor do we have to reply ...thats it really ...end of....it might be wrong ...might not .....but the answer is clear .

To be honest you might of sensed the collective sigh when you raised it

and of course if you are new to the forum not realised but this subject has been done to death and normally people are not so polite when it comes up

....its normally a single guy raises it ..and then the pussy posse move in and shred them ...so feel proud you have actually had any response

If you look at the forums you will see a few started threads along the subject and the normal response..

I take fully your point on board but this is not 1950 Great Britain its a swing board and people are too frazzled and busy to do the niceties to loads of mail ,much of which is not welcomed as it is not what individuals were looking for ....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Its really simple, take a no reply as a no thanks and move on…

Nobody is guaranteed a reply from anyone on this or any other, and its only bad manners if the said person/people asked you personally to contact them and then failed to reply.

Sending out speculative letters or unsolicited mail does not warrant a reply, so why should it be any different with emails.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

" ....its normally a single guy raises it ..and then the pussy posse move in and shred them ...so feel proud you have actually had any response

Oh PD you make us sound like a pack of wolves

lmao

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By *orkshiremonkey1Man
over a year ago

Worksop

"Its really simple, take a no reply as a no thanks and move on…

Nobody is guaranteed a reply from anyone on this or any other, and its only bad manners if the said person/people asked you personally to contact them and then failed to reply.

Sending out speculative letters or unsolicited mail does not warrant a reply, so why should it be any different with emails.

I agree with the first part of your reply, but surely it happens to be the case if you sent a message to me, for example, suggesting we might be compatable.

Moving on.....

So, pray tell, how is anyone supposed to make contact with anyone? You like the look of someone and mail them with a well worded and polite mailing. You fit all the criteria they request and you look forward to a response, only to not receive one..... Feel good? No? Wonder why no response? Maybe, but if that person had just replied with "sorry, thanks but no thanks" wouldn't that have made a difference? Interested to have a honest response

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By *orkshiremonkey1Man
over a year ago

Worksop

"Its really simple, take a no reply as a no thanks and move on…

Nobody is guaranteed a reply from anyone on this or any other, and its only bad manners if the said person/people asked you personally to contact them and then failed to reply.

Sending out speculative letters or unsolicited mail does not warrant a reply, so why should it be any different with emails.

I agree with the first part of your reply, but surely it happens to be the case if you sent a message to me, for example, suggesting we might be compatable.

Moving on.....

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By *orkshiremonkey1Man
over a year ago

Worksop

Oh bugger..... this broadband connection is pants... sorry for doubling up on that last message

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Monkey ....

Have you not milked this dry now ???? At the end of the day no one is entitled to anything, if they reply great, if not - tough.

It doesn't matter how attracted you are to them, how you meet their criteria. It doesn't matter a flying fu*k if you are 1001% compatible - if they don't reply then take it as saying "I'm not intersted" then move on ..

Surely that isn't rocket science is it ? It makes no difference how well worded your message was, how many manners you displayed in your message - No reply means Not interested - end of !!!

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By *orkshiremonkey1Man
over a year ago

Worksop

"so ...why cant you assume that no reply is simply

The analogy fit in my mind. Don't they? Consideration for the other party is sort of the point I am trying to make.

Is my standpoint so difficult to accept?

I accept you carry on so therefore why do you appear not to see where I'm coming from?

I suppose the point I'm trying to make is why does it appear that manners and graciousness are lacking? Many questions posed. And I know that at least one reply will be "piss off" lol

To be honest you might of sensed the collective sigh when you raised it

and of course if you are new to the forum not realised but this subject has been done to death and normally people are not so polite when it comes up

....its normally a single guy raises it ..and then the pussy posse move in and shred them ...so feel proud you have actually had any response

If you look at the forums you will see a few started threads along the subject and the normal response..

Again no problem re the editing.....

Ok this is not a shop, not 1950 bowler wearing, brolly carrying jolly old Blighty anymore and nor do I expect it to be. I fully appreciate the points I have made have been taken in and that with the Norties lifestyle and that people are living in an age where electronic this and that are helping support household and allowing us all sorts of shiny, bright and gleaming things to lust over (as well as us boring swingers)... no offence meant... J for joke !!! Honest!!! But isn't there still a place for a little bit of manners and maybe some "niceness" out there?

Yes there collective move to "string the bastard up, he's mentioned the not replying to mails" again was indeed felt. I also appreciate the time and effort of all the posters in response to this thread. But this shows my point in essence. We all had the decency to reply to one another.... you didn't need to come back with anything but did. Mainly to offer reasons as to why this happens (points taken on board)..... Not being torn to shreds by the "Pussy Posse" has been appreciated..... Many thanks - bows gracefully - and all in all I hope this pissing off of people (I know it has done) has not been taken as a slight at anyone decent enough to have contributed.

Emailing has it's own nuances and etiquette just as letter writing does. I suppose I am tilting at windmills in my quest for the long lost response. Or am I?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I know if I had not replied to a message then been sent another asking why I hadnt replied, any chance of us meeting would be lost, because, I for one would view them as too pushy and pressurising to meet with.

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By *orkshiremonkey1Man
over a year ago

Worksop

"Northernmonkey, can I ask if your sent mail has been read then deleted do you still send a follow up message?"

Mmmmm interesting !!!! Not sure...... I am of course referring to the matter of the plain old delete without reading in my quest for the long lost manners.

Would this be accepatable as a reply?

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By *orkshiremonkey1Man
over a year ago

Worksop

"Monkey ....

Have you not milked this dry now ???? At the end of the day no one is entitled to anything, if they reply great, if not - tough.

Surely that isn't rocket science is it ? It makes no difference how well worded your message was, how many manners you displayed in your message - No reply means Not interested - end of !!!"

Thanks for the input, I agree with the point that no one is entitled to anything. It is a free site after all.

Let me go on a little. Firstly, why be so aggressive in the tone of your statement. This is supposed to be a place for healthy discussion and debate. I can appreciate your desire to be involved with other threads but you chose to respond.... Secondly, milking it has nothing to do with it. I have an opinion I wish to air and I have..... all of you have been nice enough to go along with the debate and raise valid and interesting points. I am not wishing to be berated for my continuing to carry the torch of my quest. I am just wanting to know why this happens. I am no oil painting, a Dali or Picasso maybe, and I may not be everyones "cup of tea" but surely a response is not out of the question, is it? Even, as stated previously, an automated button saying "Never in a million years" would be better than no thing?

Rocket science it is not but no reply means nothing...... not even not interested no way or pish off...

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By *orkshiremonkey1Man
over a year ago

Worksop

"I know if I had not replied to a message then been sent another asking why I hadnt replied, any chance of us meeting would be lost, because, I for one would view them as too pushy and pressurising to meet with."

Ok, but why too pushy? and why not even validate a reply?

Would a no thanks be too much to ask?

Remember that I am referring to the delete without reading section of our fellow swinging bretheren

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you want manners, try attending a social, you'd be amazed how many people are polite and go out of there way to make you feel welcome, and probably the same people you're saying have no manners because they delete mail without replying.

In an ideal world everyone would reply with a thanks but no thanks, and a lot do reply to most like us, you're obviously mailing the wrong people, and if manners is such a big issue for you then you should be glad they didnt reply becuase it wont be someone you'd wish to meet we'd imagine, and if everyone did reply with a no thanks then the forums would then be full of posts moaning about how no-one wants to meet instead of not getting a reply.

Swings and roundabouts.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ask yourself this - how does that make you feel? Would you really want to be put out of your misery?

Interesting analogy.

I work in recruitment. All of my adverts have a standard if you've not heard within 3 days type thing on them. I don't reply to unsuccessful applicants. I think in this day and age most people realise if you don't hear back then you've not got past the first stage.

But occassionally I get hassled, peol,e that email me and call me chasing me up and I can guarantee without fail they will never register with me. There is a fine line between keen and pushy and the pushy ones are a nightmare. Way to needy, way to high maintenance. Like I say an interesting analogy.

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By *orkshiremonkey1Man
over a year ago

Worksop

"If you want manners, try attending a social, you'd be amazed how many people are polite and go out of there way to make you feel welcome, and probably the same people you're saying have no manners because they delete mail without replying.

Swings and roundabouts."

Well put and I must admit it made me chuckle too.... nice one.

Ok, firstly I imagine that due to this some would not welcome me at a social with anything other than a 12 bore, lol.

Nice post, thanks, it's rekindled a spark of faith in all things swinging

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Where do I totally dismiss or disrespect anyone elses posts or position on the matter?

I work a 50 hour week. Does that suggest that my weekends might be quite precious? So lets aste sometime saying thanks but no thanks.

And oddly my enjoyment of the scene is not governed by how many emails we send or receive but by meeting people either in private or at socials.

We have all shared the disappointment of having no reply to an email from a profile we like, but if it is that much of an issue to you, you possibky need to question what you are looking for here. I'll be honest if I read this thread after you'd contacted me you'd be straight on block because I'd be thinking needy and attachment issues.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ok, but why too pushy? and why not even validate a reply?

Would a no thanks be too much to ask?

Remember that I am referring to the delete without reading section of our fellow swinging bretheren"

Pushy because you cant seem to accept, that if someone was interested they would have mailed you back, and then after they have already deleted 1 message you feel the need to send them another?

Im sorry but that would definatly end all hope ever of us meeting, as I would be worried about the meet, ie if he cant accept that I just didnt want to reply would he accept other no's? Im quite sure your not like that at all, Im not suggesting that you dont accept no is no, but im pretty sure thats what alot of people would think if you dont start accepting the fact that no reply is a no to meet.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

omg is this post still going, lol, time for a new one !!!

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By *orkshiremonkey1Man
over a year ago

Worksop

Ask yourself this - how does that make you feel? Would you really want to be put out of your misery?

Interesting analogy.

Right like the sound of this.... the info is there plain and simple on your ads. Yes? Ok but the profiles don't carry that info nor am I expecting them to. The fact is nor is it mentioned anywhere else for that matter. Ok this may be a standard of yours but how does this parallel to the swinging scene?

Now reading between the lines...... I feel a tonal undercurrent here, am I right? Keen and pushy.... fine line between..... oh I agree. However, there is definate inference. Is that correct?

However, you have only related to the scene set out in the analogy..... what about the questions posed? Or were you making a point with the inference?

If I am wrong then please accept my apologies..... but interesting nonetheless.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The thing is there’s also no info or rules telling people they MUST read the emails they receive, so in effect threatening you’ll start to name and shame people who ignore your mail or refuse to read it might sound rather creepy to some people, after all most people will check a profile before reading the email.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

And a thread got pulled tonight for being OTT this one should be pulled for over stimulating sleep glands...

YAWNS................ sorry

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Monkey ....

Have you not milked this dry now ???? At the end of the day no one is entitled to anything, if they reply great, if not - tough.

Surely that isn't rocket science is it ? It makes no difference how well worded your message was, how many manners you displayed in your message - No reply means Not interested - end of !!!

Thanks for the input, I agree with the point that no one is entitled to anything. It is a free site after all.

Rocket science it is not but no reply means nothing...... not even not interested no way or pish off... "

I'm not being agressive my friend - simply being blunt and to the point ..... Furthermore, I think every possbile avenue and angle has been explored and debated - what more do you want from people ? Everyone to promise you a nice reply to match your well mannered message ? If so, it will never in a million years happen, never has, never will, so why not just resign yourself to the fact and be happy with your lot the same as the majority of people on this and other sites are ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

As above lol....

Yawns again with more vigour though lol...

Accept it and move on lol.. Anyone who has read all this would have gone off the idea of a shag by now anyway...

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By *orkshiremonkey1Man
over a year ago

Worksop

Where do I totally dismiss or disrespect anyone elses posts or position on the matter?

I work a 50 hour week. Does that suggest that my weekends might be quite precious? So lets aste sometime saying thanks but no thanks.

And oddly my enjoyment of the scene is not governed by how many emails we send or receive but by meeting people either in private or at socials.

Hardworking and obviously good at your job..... good to know that the looming darkness of recession has not yet reached the recruitment sector.....

Psychiatry and psychology doctorates too? Busy chap, lol

Ok time is precious to us all and as I said previously I am here to debate healthily not be berated by you nor anyone else. I feel my point is valid and I am aware obviously that you feel yours is too, but that is what exactly? I have enjoyed the scene on and off for around 10 years and have had some very memorable and amusing encounters, so meetings (either social or intimate) are what I prefer also. I always attempt to show that I am a honourable and personable individual with whom anyone can converse or become more intimate with. The profiles and subsequent emails are the initial contact between partys, just as the car keys were back in the 70's of the scene..... I can of course remember the 70's and the time of the Party 7 & Watneys Red Label, not however the swinging scene as I was but a young slip of a lad.

Re the 50 hours.... very admirable !!! Hard work gains reward and the time you have to spare you must use to have fun as you see fit. I offer this, if the hours are not to your liking find another position which gives you more time..... Simple. I also can remember when I was working 15 hour days as a security operative when I started to save for my first house or when working 12 hour nights or days in the steelworks at 18 years old. Those days are past now and these old bones never complain.

"They don't know they're born today" is a phrase that comes to mind.

You cannot obviously accept my point of view but feel the need to, as stated in the header of the new forum post page, "badmouth" me.

Anyway, all my atachment issues have been ironed out now. My shrink says so, but thanks for your analysis.... I'll be sure to pass it on, lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

im not even reading anymore on here, but im noticing u write some bloody long posts, blimey u must have lots of spare time on yr hands lol

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By *orkshiremonkey1Man
over a year ago

Worksop

Ok, but why too pushy? and why not even validate a reply?

Would a no thanks be too much to ask?

Remember that I am referring to the delete without reading section of our fellow swinging bretheren

Pushy because you cant seem to accept, that if someone was interested they would have mailed you back, and then after they have already deleted 1 message you feel the need to send them another?

All of what you say is a valid point but we single males are not all mad axe murderers. No I know you didn't say that but why not answer a simple mail?

Do you answer the phone and speak to a relative? Would you reply to an older family member who was "techno-shy" that wrote a letter? Or a friend living overseas?

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By *adchickCouple
over a year ago

Cyprus

Isn't it time this was pulled or locked?

The forums are turning into the bordums.

I personally think someone has got enough mileage and attention out of this subject and they still don't realise that it's NOT bad manners to reply, but CHOICE.

I'm seriously considering my time on here. FFS, before the forums used to be fun........ now it's all whinge whinge whine!

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By *orkshiremonkey1Man
over a year ago

Worksop

I know I am labouring the point..... I can honestly say I have enjoyed this exchange some replies more than others...... you all have made this something I would love to do again......

I can hear you groaning, now stop that !!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ok, but why too pushy? and why not even validate a reply?

Would a no thanks be too much to ask?

Remember that I am referring to the delete without reading section of our fellow swinging bretheren

Pushy because you cant seem to accept, that if someone was interested they would have mailed you back, and then after they have already deleted 1 message you feel the need to send them another?

All of what you say is a valid point but we single males are not all mad axe murderers. No I know you didn't say that but why not answer a simple mail?

Do you answer the phone and speak to a relative? Would you reply to an older family member who was "techno-shy" that wrote a letter? Or a friend living overseas?

lol yes how can you compare answering the phone to a relative to not replying to someone I would have never met or spoken to in my life ? anyway like maddie said over this is never gonna be resolved lol x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ok, but why too pushy? and why not even validate a reply?

Would a no thanks be too much to ask?

Remember that I am referring to the delete without reading section of our fellow swinging bretheren

Pushy because you cant seem to accept, that if someone was interested they would have mailed you back, and then after they have already deleted 1 message you feel the need to send them another?

All of what you say is a valid point but we single males are not all mad axe murderers. No I know you didn't say that but why not answer a simple mail?

Do you answer the phone and speak to a relative? Would you reply to an older family member who was "techno-shy" that wrote a letter? Or a friend living overseas?

Sat outside this thread for a while as it has been done to death on so many levels and so many occasions but the arguement now being put forward is simply laughable

"Do you answer the phone and speak to a relative? Would you reply to an older family member who was "techno-shy" that wrote a letter? Or a friend living overseas?"

If we are to assume none of those folks mentioned are ever likely to appear on the same swinging websites you subscribe to where on earth is the relevance of that anology?

Try this anology which is as real time and I look forward to your arguements.......

Postman Pat brings the mail, in amongst it you find a bank statement, a letter from auntie mildred, a flyer from a local gardener advertising his services, a phone bill, a letter from your childs school asking about attendance issues and a poster from your local church asking you to attend Church next sunday.

Which ones get a response, which ones get filed away and which ones get shredded?

The whole thrust of the responses to your question are that of complete pragmatism, which you misconstrue as bad manners, but spin it 180 degrees and can you consider that your continued bleating about no replies simply proves experianced folk in this games point.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Im not sure that all your 'sent messages' stay on do they? So I may have mailed people more than once, when I would not have intended to.

I get more replies here, most are negative, but I do get good ones, so this aint too bad a site.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Now treating my fore head with disrespect..................

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

grrrrrrrrrrr someone lock this lol

its now boringggggggggggggggggggggggg

lol

im the bitch who never replies, sooooo wotttttt lol

oops 1 to many :-s

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not everybody's abusive... A few frustrated people havin a bad day... Don't take it personally darlin... Keep the faith and keep fuckin! Paul. x x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This is exactly why women should not be allowed full and free access to technology...... xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Not everybody's abusive... A few frustrated people havin a bad day... Don't take it personally darlin... Keep the faith and keep fuckin! Paul. x x"

lol i aint taking nothing personal, lol

never will on these sites, im just bored of this post, hehe......

one day, just one day, ppl will understand that no reply means no interest ggrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr lol

ok off to bed now lol night xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Monkey,

In amongst the drivel I look forward to your response chap.

TTBW

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Gosh...you all do bite so easily in here don't you? lmao!!

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By *leasureDomeMan
over a year ago

all over the place

i am actualy now finding it funny .not the serious points being made ...just the mindless boredom of it ....its like a monty python sketch ......

i blame the pussy posse ...normally they would of come in and fettled everyone asking the same question over and over...but even their leader came in with a bleak feeble shot and left !!!

please maddie come back... all is forgiven

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By *adchickCouple
over a year ago

Cyprus

"i am actualy now finding it funny .not the serious points being made ...just the mindless boredom of it ....its like a monty python sketch ......

i blame the pussy posse ...normally they would of come in and fettled everyone asking the same question over and over...but even their leader came in with a bleak feeble shot and left !!!

please maddie come back... all is forgiven "

I just can't be bothered with the mindless numpties on here sometimes.

Single blokes get a bad name because some of them are complete eejits!

This thread is a case in point.

I've got my own troubles at the moment, ones that seriously affect my future. I've got assignments and a dissertation that I'm fighting to make sense of, and it;s got to the point where I want to walk out of uni.

I used to come on here to lighten my mood and to help destress myself.

With that gone.............I might as well go and put my head in my hands and just get myself all worked up over a module I'm struggling with and then throw plates at hubby.

ADMIN........ please lock this bloody thread, it's making me feel all depressed!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Dont feel depressed mad,

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Go vent your spleen with some washing up or ironing, that sort of thing normally works well for you girlies.............

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By *adchickCouple
over a year ago

Cyprus

"Go vent your spleen with some washing up or ironing, that sort of thing normally works well for you girlies............."

Sticks two fingers up and blows a raspberry!

Bollox

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There you go, good old Mr Two2 has cured your angst with just a few key strokes.

So go get them projects sorted as I am sure you will find the time and I know you have the ability so it should soon be job done!!

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By *leasureDomeMan
over a year ago

all over the place

look i got a good idea ...if no one replies to the thread it will just slip down off the page and disappear forever ....its nothing to do with what the original op asked for now ....

ssssssshhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

good idea PD, lets leave it a week then bump the fooker hahahahaha

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By *leasureDomeMan
over a year ago

all over the place

shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

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By *orkshiremonkey1Man
over a year ago

Worksop

"Not everybody's abusive... A few frustrated people havin a bad day... Don't take it personally darlin... Keep the faith and keep fuckin! Paul. x x

lol i aint taking nothing personal, lol

never will on these sites, im just bored of this post, hehe......

one day, just one day, ppl will understand that no reply means no interest ggrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr lol

ok off to bed now lol night xx"

Sorry to be a pain in the neck but if you are not liking the thread ignore it or don't take part..... No offence intended

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By *orkshiremonkey1Man
over a year ago

Worksop

"Monkey,

In amongst the drivel I look forward to your response chap.

TTBW"

In relation to what lol?

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By *orkshiremonkey1Man
over a year ago

Worksop

Quote "Try this anology which is as real time and I look forward to your arguements.......

Which ones get a response, which ones get filed away and which ones get shredded?

I hope you will give my regards to Postman Pat....... Been a while since I saw him..... BTW How's Jess? Bank Statement..... bin em never have any cash anyway so no interest in those. I have no Auntie Mildred. The flyer gets recycled & passed on to Lady Chatterley, as I have a very low maintenance garden.... concrete painted green to imitate grass. Phone bills are non-existent here as have a mobile on PAYG and same for net access. I have had the snip for some time now so I have no children (maybe why I haven't seen Postman Pat for a while also) and I'm an atheist so the church can whistle (they already have far too much money anyway... Alms for the poor, alms for the poor).

Responses of complete pragmatism, mmmmm...... practical consequences key to meaning or truth you mean?...... Ok.... 80 messages a day equates to over an hour of time to reply to all.... Well put (by Darcie I believe).... I responded with (paraphrasing somewhat)... I agree not all messages are worthy of reply.... Those not bin worthy may be ok to respond to if they meet the requirements set out in your profile or you find them attractive enough to want to pursue it further. These are the ones I refer to and individuals who bin without reading mails...... surely this is still ill mannered?

I offer this, I do not misconstrue the point at all. I have said all along, I welcome debate and wanted opinion on my viewpoint... some opinion was quite frankly responded to by "just get over it and move on".... not really debating I feel, don't you? Just dismissive... old chestnut subject but surely doesn't warrant that sort treatment. Others just berated me and inferred via tone of message that I have attachment issues (sorted says my shrink) and am a pushy sort (ask those I've met via this and other sites)... I am anything but pushy..... Others offered interesting dialogue and made for healthy debate...... All points are taken at face value and I enjoyed contribution by all involved.

Finally, I am, I should like to point out, as experienced as the vast majority on this and other sites having been a member of 3 swinging sites (on and off) since 1998/9.... thats 10 years plus (please read several posts back... I did mention this) and several more since then. There are some, I am sure, who have been involved in the scene for more years than I to greater or lesser degree. I therefore feel you, and many others, have a misconception in perceiving I am a "newbie" ..... Oh and it's sheep that bleat....... I am not of the "flocking" nature. But well put and accepted as a valid belief.... it's just not mine, sorry.

PS.... I did say I thanked everyone for contributing..... this meant I was willing to let this go and put it to bed..... but you HAD to come back to me lol..... Take care all

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By *orkshiremonkey1Man
over a year ago

Worksop

Maddie..... throw the plates.... you know it makes sense !!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

send me an email so i can happily ignore it

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By *orkshiremonkey1Man
over a year ago

Worksop

"send me an email so i can happily ignore it"

Nope..... you'll just ignore it..!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We treat this whole answering messages thing with one simple requirement:

Do we fancy the sender?

Yes = reply

No = delete.

What could be more simpler.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We treat this whole answering messages thing with one simple requirement:

Do we fancy the sender?

Yes = reply

No = delete.

What could be more simpler."

simple and effective x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Dismissive, now thats maybe a little rich considering your standpoint. Some would argue that you have had plenty of constructive response to your question but having drawn your line in the sand it's left you with little room for manoeuvre.

Ponder this if you would......

You search through various profiles and find one that seems to fit the bill and you appear to tick all the relevant boxes.

You craft a well written pm and send it off but you hear nothing back. You know they have read it because this site tells you that so by your standards they are now consider rude and impolite, unless I have misunderstood what you are saying.

Did you ever stop to consider that when the folk you contacted, on opening your email found there was something in you style of writing or the actual content of the message that instantly put them off.

Or maybe before reading the email, like us, they checked your profile and thought not for us.

Or, well I could go on, but do you not consider that maybe it's a little conceited of you to think that just because you have selected them for contact because you think you are right for them that they must therefore respond.

As Wishy says a lot of the pragmatic people on here treat all contact in the manner he describes which if you think about it is very hard to argue.

No reply = You are not wanted which may be a toughie for you to take but you need to suck it up and move on.

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

Seems to have gone full circle now.

Thread closed.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

HI KNOW WHAT YOU MEAN HAVE ONLY BEEN ON HERE THREE WEEKS AND FOUND THE SAME SOME PEPOLE CAN BE SO RUDE AND MOST OF THESE COUPLES NEED TO PRACTICE WHAT THEY PREACH ASKING FOR PICS OR THEY WONT RESPOUND AND WHEN YOU DO THEY DONT BOTHER TO REPLY ANYWAY AND IF YOU ASK FOR A PICS OF PEPOLE WHY DO THEY NEVER BOTHER TO SEND YOU ANY TO SHOW THEM SELFS IT DONT TAKE TWO MINS TO REPLY AND SAY NO THANK YOU

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