FabSwingers.com mobile

Join us FREE, we're FREE to use

Web's largest swingers site since 2006.

Already registered?
Login here

Back to forum list
Back to The Lounge

Anyone 'rapturing' tomorrow?

Jump to newest
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Well, it's finally arrived.

What? What? What? I hear you clamour!

Apocolypse Day.

It's tomorrow apparently.

Evangical Wiseass Harold Camping, 89, has predicted that tomorrow, May 21 2011, will be the start of the apocolypse and that Jesus will return to Earth and take all the Christians to Heaven, or 'raptured' to Heaven. It might take him some time cos there's a lot of them but he hopes to have them all safely ensconsed behind the safety of the Pearly Gates by October 21, at which point all the non-Christians will be dead.

An atheist and entrepreneur from North Hampshire, is enjoying a boost in business for his company Eternal Earth-bound Pets, which he set up to look after the pets of those who believe they will be raptured. He has more than 250 clients who are paying up to $135 (£83) to have their pets picked up and cared for after the rapture. "They will be disappointed twice," he told the Wall Street Journal. "Once because they weren't raptured and again because I don't do refunds."

Mr Camping has been in the Propheci business for sometime, having predicted the Apocolypse for 1994, an event, his followers now believe, was just an intermediary event.

Did I miss something in 1994?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

I'll keep an eye out for the fellas on horses.... if they are fit I'll be asking them in for mmfmm

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

As i said the other day, im resting tonight preparing myself for my next life of hell and debauchary

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I'll keep an eye out for the fellas on horses.... if they are fit I'll be asking them in for mmfmm "

What happens if one of them gets pissed the night before and can't make it - will the Apocolypse still go ahead or will they have to reschedule?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester


"I'll keep an eye out for the fellas on horses.... if they are fit I'll be asking them in for mmfmm

What happens if one of them gets pissed the night before and can't make it - will the Apocolypse still go ahead or will they have to reschedule? "

You can't even have a good ol' rapture these days without fecking timewasters

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I'm gonna start a new insurance business that is just for December 21 2012. Comprehensive cover for wanton destruction by God that covers absolutely everything but it has to be destroyed in a single act.

£50 premium.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

I have been looking at the profiles to see who I think won’t turn up and my money is on Famine!

I know Death and War have been verified a few times. Pestilence is a barebacker with a dose, so I blocked him. However, judging by the GUM clinic stats, he's still meeting people. But that Famine guy is a right tight sod. I know we shouldn’t name names, but he promised to take me on a dinner date ages ago and I haven’t seen one scrap of food.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

It's Rapture Day everyone!!

I wonder what time JC will be swinging by. Will he want tea you reckon? What do you give an omnipotent deity for lunch? I don't want to make it too simple or he'll start filling dozens of fookin baskets with it and frankly we just don't have the garden space for multitudes of starving eastern europeans. Siren will probably want to run a hoover over the place, can't have JC thinking we live in slum, even though he was a poor carpenter from a little hut by the sea himself.

Bugger better show up after all the trouble we've gone to.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yeah I might pop up later.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

it's not the end of the world quite today... it is suppose to be the 1st major sign of the end of the world... suppose to be a massive earthquake today.. followed by 5 months of lots of natural diasters... then the end of the world is suppose to be in october!!!!

p.s if you see me outside a car showroom today.... I am not looting, i am scavaging!!!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

get a couple of cases of beer invite few women round an party till dawn

sorted

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

And there was me thinking it was a thread about Falconry or Hawking.

It turns out its only about the end of the world.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"And there was me thinking it was a thread about Falconry or Hawking.

It turns out its only about the end of the world. "

I know.... very disappointing

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

ooooh another good reason

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"And there was me thinking it was a thread about Falconry or Hawking.

It turns out its only about the end of the world.

I know.... very disappointing "

Isnt Val Connery Sean's uncle...

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"And there was me thinking it was a thread about Falconry or Hawking.

It turns out its only about the end of the world.

I know.... very disappointing

Isnt Val Connery Sean's uncle...

well well another turnip for the box.

"

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"And there was me thinking it was a thread about Falconry or Hawking.

It turns out its only about the end of the world.

I know.... very disappointing

Isnt Val Connery Sean's uncle...

well well another turnip for the box.

"

Nah... Thats shallot....

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ushroom7Man
over a year ago

Bradford


"And there was me thinking it was a thread about Falconry or Hawking.

It turns out its only about the end of the world.

I know.... very disappointing

Isnt Val Connery Sean's uncle...

well well another turnip for the box.

Nah... Thats shallot.... "

Firstly i thought No, that's shallow.

Then i thought that the bottom of barrels are not that shallow.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"And there was me thinking it was a thread about Falconry or Hawking.

It turns out its only about the end of the world.

I know.... very disappointing

Isnt Val Connery Sean's uncle...

well well another turnip for the box.

Nah... Thats shallot....

Firstly i thought No, that's shallow.

Then i thought that the bottom of barrels are not that shallow. "

bobbin apples, we are starting to vegetate!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *arnayguyMan
over a year ago

Durham Tees

Well if any ladies are keen on celebrating the second cumming, I'm more than happy to oblige!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"And there was me thinking it was a thread about Falconry or Hawking.

It turns out its only about the end of the world.

I know.... very disappointing

Isnt Val Connery Sean's uncle...

well well another turnip for the box.

Nah... Thats shallot....

Firstly i thought No, that's shallow.

Then i thought that the bottom of barrels are not that shallow. "

Good to see you scraping in with the old gags...

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *razydriver8Couple
over a year ago

plymouth

ok its after 6 pm,, is there anyone left out there or have you all been raptured.

.

.

.

. hello.

anyone..

there must be some peeps out there still...

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *oDownEasyMan
over a year ago

Ayrshire

Well I am worried about the rapture..I thought they died out millions of years ago, and if Jurassic park is to be believed, they can open doors, and have nasty sharp teeth!

But hey, if the Apocolypse is coming, why shouldnt we all be? Anyone up for a bit of world shattering sex with me tonight?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"ok its after 6 pm,, is there anyone left out there or have you all been raptured.

.

.

.

. hello.

anyone..

there must be some peeps out there still... "

BOO!!!!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *razydriver8Couple
over a year ago

plymouth


"ok its after 6 pm,, is there anyone left out there or have you all been raptured.

.

.

.

. hello.

anyone..

there must be some peeps out there still...

BOO!!!! "

AHHHH scared the bjesus outta me

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"ok its after 6 pm,, is there anyone left out there or have you all been raptured.

.

.

.

. hello.

anyone..

there must be some peeps out there still... "

I guess i wasnt one of the 0.3% chosen either

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Harold Camping daft cunt that's twice now he's got it wrong ffs * gutted*

well of t pub then

* creEps roUnd grAveyaRd * -|-

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *nvictusMan
over a year ago

Beeston

Isn't it supposed to be an octopuss who predicts this stuff?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *adchickCouple
over a year ago

Cyprus

I'll be the pissed one, in the corner.

Someone pick me up on the way.......

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *plpxp2Couple
over a year ago

Middlesbrough

Its started, the countrys in a mess and the condems are in power....does this mean I'm in hell

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *adchickCouple
over a year ago

Cyprus


"Its started, the countrys in a mess and the condems are in power....does this mean I'm in hell "

Nope.....

Cheltenhams being battered by very high winds, Sky's on the blink, Jason's in a foul mood cus he couldn't watch the F1 qualifying, my head hurts and all electrical appliances in this house are doing as they please because of the power surges we keep getting due to the shite weather.

I'm gonna avoid the end of the world by hiding under my duvet

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Its started, the countrys in a mess and the condems are in power....does this mean I'm in hell "

The Condoms cant be in power...

... They got no Mates...

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Isn't it supposed to be an octopuss who predicts this stuff? "
Keep up vicci he died last year

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *eaboMan
over a year ago

marden

did i miss it?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

The silly old sod has now come out and said sorry for getting it wrong but God forgot to tell him that as a merciful God he'll kill us all a bit quicker than originally planned so the date for the actual armageddy thing is now Oct 21st.

Stupid old fart.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *unky monkeyMan
over a year ago

in the night garden

This has come as a huge embarrassment to me personally.

I had thought I would be dead by now and therefore I may have told my mother in law she was a malevolent old cunt on Saturday.

That's the last time I plan my life around the rambling thoughts of senile fire and brimstone preacher from the deep south.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *nvictusMan
over a year ago

Beeston


"Isn't it supposed to be an octopuss who predicts this stuff? Keep up vicci he died last year"

I bet he never saw that coming.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead


"The silly old sod has now come out and said sorry for getting it wrong but God forgot to tell him that as a merciful God he'll kill us all a bit quicker than originally planned so the date for the actual armageddy thing is now Oct 21st.

Stupid old fart."

thats okay... week after my b'day... i suppose i better go out with a big bang then....

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Isn't it supposed to be an octopuss who predicts this stuff? Keep up vicci he died last year

I bet he never saw that coming. "

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 
 

By *razydriver8Couple
over a year ago

plymouth

cool now i dont have to buy any christmas pressies..

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
Post new Message to Thread
back to top