FabSwingers.com forum: Playing with a married man

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Why is it the cardinal sin on here for some not to play with married/attached people?

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

I went to answer the other thread and it went lol x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not to?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I know so I reworded this one.

It's a popular topic so can't see why it was pulled

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By *irtyGirlWoman
over a year ago

Edinburgh

"Why is it the cardinal sin on here for some not to play with married/attached people?"

I don't consider it a cardinal sin. It's not really about morals either... as a rule I choose not to get involved with those who are cheating mainly because I don't want to be caught up in the backlash should it go tits up.

What other people do is no concern to me, be that those playing away or those playing with them.

The only time I don't ask nor care is when I meet people at clubs... I don't need a life history for people that I'm probably not going to see again.

So in answer to your question, I have no idea!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've read several different threads supporting both sides to the argument on this subject.

I personally _iew this subject with the following mindset...

If I were married, and met others for sex, I wouldn't be in a position to argue if my wife did the same to me!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Some people have scruples and wont entertain them...

Loads do but dont realise they married.

Loads have been cheated on so wont do the same to someone else etc.

Many dont wish to involve them selves in the following divorce proceedings

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Probably cos it's been done to death and will very quickly descend into total mayhem amid accusations of all married men playing away being total wankers.

When in fact, all men, married or not, are wankers - we all do it, why deny it. I tug at least once per day, if not five.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I can see some not wanting to play on here with married men say but in a club how you going to know? Not all wear a wedding ring x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

no sin...each to their own. but it's easier if your playmate is as flexible about your needs as much as they are their own

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Why is it the cardinal sin on here for some not to play with married/attached people?"

its not, its just some people dont choose to shit on someones poor wife whilst others do.

anyone in a relationship based on trust and commitment shouldnt be trying to get his end up any available munter going.

the excuses will pour out of these people as to why they do it on this thread but if your not happy with your partner then leave them and be single again.

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By *ustyWoman
over a year ago

inverclyde

i wont play with a married or attached man for the same reason dont want to be the piggy in the middle

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Probably cos it's been done to death and will very quickly descend into total mayhem amid accusations of all married men playing away being total wankers.

When in fact, all men, married or not, are wankers - we all do it, why deny it. I tug at least once per day, if not five.

Well me for one don't think married men are wankers at the end of the day we all have needs

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There are also alot of "cheating " wives

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"There are also alot of "cheating " wives

"
which is why we worded it partners

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I can see some not wanting to play on here with married men say but in a club how you going to know? Not all wear a wedding ring x"

So is it the knowing he's married, or the act of shagging a married man albeit unbeknown, that's the root of the problem?

Answering that honestly should tell you that if you aren't aware he's married and shag him then in the back of your mind you don't really care and it's domestic affairs are his own business.

Before anyone condemns that _iew, I'd ask that do people who steadfastedly refuse to play with married men do absolutely everything they can to establish that the guy is single?

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By *atisfy janeWoman
over a year ago

Torquay

I think the term 'knowingly' is relevant here, most people wouldn't 'knowingly' meet married people playing without permission....but as you have pointed out that is not always possible to assertain in a club or party situation.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

As I see it they are the ones cheating so why should you care?

It's not an attack just how I see it x

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By *emima_puddlefuckCouple
over a year ago

hexham

"Why is it the cardinal sin on here for some not to play with married/attached people?"

Erm,because every one has their own limits and boundaries?

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By *atisfy janeWoman
over a year ago

Torquay

"As I see it they are the ones cheating so why should you care?

It's not an attack just how I see it x"

Then if that works for you Janelle, it's your business and no-one elses.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well i know that when playing at chams etc...

Those little words dont get a mention.

Well i honestly havent mentioned them and those i know dont either.

And play progresses on...

Totally guiltless and in ignorance.

Not saying its right or i condont anyone cheating..

But in clubs etc...

Its the norm just to have fun by quite a lot of people and no questions asked.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i wnt meet married or attached men cos it end day cnt plz one woman never plz other ....i have been cheated on and it hurts so would never do it to other woman why have there bread buttered both ends

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Dunno what all the fuss is about really. After all, what is sex?

All a man is doing is putting his pisser up a woman's pisser, why attach so much emotional bollocks to it?

{runs off again}

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By *atisfy janeWoman
over a year ago

Torquay

"Well i know that when playing at chams etc...

Those little words dont get a mention.

Well i honestly havent mentioned them and those i know dont either.

And play progresses on...

Totally guiltless and in ignorance.

Not saying its right or i condont anyone cheating..

But in clubs etc...

Its the norm just to have fun by quite a lot of people and no questions asked.

Exactly....it's not possible to play in clubs etc. and know the ins and outs of someone elses personal life.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Dunno what all the fuss is about really. After all, what is sex?

All a man is doing is putting his pisser up a woman's pisser, why attach so much emotional bollocks to it?

{runs off again}

Where's the romance Wishy lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"As I see it they are the ones cheating so why should you care?

It's not an attack just how I see it x"

I see it that way to. I dont ask the question, I am not interested in what they do for a living, what car they drive, where they live. I am only interested in whether I find them attractive, they make me laugh, I feel comfortable with them, my partner feels comfortable with them, we understand each others limits.

I dont give my phone number to any playmate and i dont expect to hear from them on a personal level after the meet (apart from an friendship message once in a while on here etc)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 03/03/11 19:52:50]

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By *atisfy janeWoman
over a year ago

Torquay

"i wnt meet married or attached men cos it end day cnt plz one woman never plz other ....i have been cheated on and it hurts so would never do it to other woman why have there bread buttered both ends

You mean you won't 'knowingly'....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Dunno what all the fuss is about really. After all, what is sex?

All a man is doing is putting his pisser up a woman's pisser, why attach so much emotional bollocks to it?

{runs off again}

Where's the romance Wishy lol"

Box of chocs every Feb 14th and Xmas Day. Make em last!

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By *andy muncherMan
over a year ago

Nottingham

Yes i does hurt like hell been there as well

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

In clubs and at parties i would say the majority of us have played with married people whose partners are unaware of their swinging lifestyle. I dont really see why a meet in a different location is that different to be honest - its not as if they are any more attached to you having a meet in your home or at a club

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

"I know so I reworded this one.

It's a popular topic so can't see why it was pulled "

If a mod makes a judgement to pull it then you shouldn't be started another one.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

That's my point Iconic some say I won't play with them on here but happy to in a club. No differance to me x

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

In my life, i have played with a lot of attatched men. I can put my hand on my heart and say ive never had any trouble with single guys, its always been the attatched ones that decide they have fallen in love with you or want to leave their partner for you

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Never had that I can't see one leaving his wife for a tranny lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

were getting married soon janelle you can play with us xxxxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This time last year i was falling to bits because i'd found this site in the history of my own laptop, which the man i wanted to spend my life with had been using while i'd been away for a weekend. I spent several weeks using the site to see when he was online - while i was in bed mostly, torturing myself trying to decide what to do. Sad i guess but i hoped he was just using it to look at pics and hoped i'd learn to turn a blind eye to it. One day he left it logged in and i found the full extent of his use and frankly the bottom fell out of my world. I'd never knowingly want to be a part of putting anyone else through that.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"were getting married soon janelle you can play with us xxxxx"

Well your friends so it goes without saying sweets. Hope Mandy is feeling better x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

shes better now janelle thanx xxxxxxxxx

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

But brightbabe not everyones honest on here some don't always say they are married and pretend they are single and get away with it x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"But brightbabe not everyones honest on here some don't always say they are married and pretend they are single and get away with it x"

Totally, that's why I said knowingly. The most you can do is make the choices with the information you've got. And mine is not to play if I KNOW they're attached.

But blokes with partners give a lot of signals without even realising it and if I find out at a later date they're not single, it's endex, no questions asked.

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By *adchickCouple
over a year ago

Cyprus

"Why is it the cardinal sin on here for some not to play with married/attached people?"

Because for some of us, swinging is about trust and honesty with our own partners and we won't meet those that can't be truthful and honest with their own partner.

If a spouse is cheating, then they have no trust and honesty, something WE strive for.

We may have unwittingly played with a married person at a club but you do find that they have a tendancy to have left by 8pm so they can get home. I won't say it's right, but I have no doubt those of us that play in clubs have probably done it at some point.

But also, for my own reasoning, I've been cheated on and it nearly destroyed me........ I never want to put someone else through that.

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

"Why is it the cardinal sin on here for some not to play with married/attached people?"

Why shouldn't it be?

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

I wish I could remember which thread I posted the buying a microwave analogy.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I've read several different threads supporting both sides to the argument on this subject.

I personally _iew this subject with the following mindset...

If I were married, and met others for sex, I wouldn't be in a position to argue if my wife did the same to me!"

Sounds fair to me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Dunno what all the fuss is about really. After all, what is sex?

All a man is doing is putting his pisser up a woman's pisser, why attach so much emotional bollocks to it?

{runs off again}

Run like the wind!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Why is it the cardinal sin on here for some not to play with married/attached people?

Why shouldn't it be?"

it was a question jeez

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

They are only cheaters if people help them to cheat

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

"Why is it the cardinal sin on here for some not to play with married/attached people?

Why shouldn't it be?

it was a question jeez "

So was mine.

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

Found it.... here is one I prepared earlier.....

I’m going to be honest, not that I haven’t been honest in my previous posts, so I guess honest isn’t the right word and ‘open’ is…. anyway….

When I first discovered the swinging scene many, many moons ago, I too thought ‘it’s not my problem’ if someone is married, after all it’s not like I am planning on keeping them. I even pointed out the potential double standards of people slating married cheating men (and women) who went dogging or to swinging clubs.

But, over time my _iews have changed, largely due to seeing the behaviour of someone who I thought of as a close friend. Whilst they did break and bend the rules they had agreed with their partner allowing them to have fun away, it was more how they were prepared to lie, mislead and use other people in order to get their bit of cock. As I distanced myself from that situation I re-evaluated my own behaviour.

I had always had my own set of rules:

1 - Be honest with yourself about what you want.

2 - Be honest with those who you meet or intend to meet about what you really want.

3 - Never do anything you don’t really want to in order to make someone else happy.

Having sex with cheats didn’t at first appear to break my rules… until I thought about why I had those rules. The overall aim of the rules is to ensure it is fun and no one gets hurt.

Doing someone which could potential leave someone emotionally shattered, ruin lives and destroy families doesn’t come into my understanding of ‘fun and no one gets hurt’.

Back in the day I didn’t think cheating was the worst thing a person could do to their partner, oddly I still don’t. But it doesn’t make it right.

Some may think I am a hypocrite with double standards as I will admit there are situations, such as playing in a swinging club, where I won’t check if all involved are single or have consent to be there. Some may think this is just a case of ‘ignorance is bliss’ and saying it’s just not practical to check at the time is a feeble excuse. But there is more to it than the practicality and a bit of good faith…. for me it’s about aiding and abetting.

I didn’t ask, invite or encourage those people to be in that club and be in the position they are in. If I arrange to meet someone who isn’t at liberty to be meeting people for sex then I am encouraging them and making their action of cheating possible and for this I must take part responsibility for any consequences.

I liken it to buying a microwave.

If I ask some dodgy bloke down the pub if he can get hold of a cheap microwave for me, and he or one of his mates goes out and robs some old dear, knocking her to the ground and breaking her hip as they run from her bungalow… I have to accept a portion of the responsibility because my need encouraged them to go out and do it.

If I buy a microwave from some fella at a car-boot sale, it is not practical for me to check if he robbed it or not and I have to show some good faith that he didn’t. Even if it is knocked off, I didn’t encourage him to go and rob it.

Some people say “I’m not forcing a married person to cheat” and that may be the case, but by knowingly arranging to meet them, you are making it possible and helping them…. you are part of it.

Who is worse, the crack-head junkie who mugs someone so they can get a fix or the people who helped them become a junkie in the first place,… who no doubt often say “I didn’t force them to become a junkie”.

Me personally, I don’t want the responsibility of aiding and abetting a cheat…. it’s not harmless fun, it does hurt people sooner or later. I don’t have recreational sex to hurt people.

I can only think of two reasons right now why a cheat would not be able to understand why so many people on a swinging site would be opposed to meeting them.

The first is they are either ignorant or stupid… which means their partner will be finding out sooner rather than later.

The second is the common misconception that because swingers (couples) have sex with people other than their partner, they can’t have any morals and any singles who indulge in recreational sex must be immoral too. Which kind of brings it back around to being ignorant and stupid; for not being able to see there is a moral difference between consenting adults who are at liberty to indulge and those who choose to cheat.

If people choose to cheat on their partner it is their own business, but I won’t be helping them.

I don’t believe cheats (or those who help them cheat) should be pounced upon in threads with no relevance to their cheating.

If a cheat is foolhardy enough to post in a thread about cheating, they should not expect a rush of approval just because this is a swinging site….. sexually liberated does not equate to without morals and principles.

If they try and justify their cheating, well in my opinion they deserve everything that gets thrown at them. As I said earlier in the thread, there is no justifiable excuse, if there was they would tell it to their partner and be given permission to play away.

I find the dismissive attitude of “it’s a sex site” a tad offensive; as it makes a huge assumption that everyone on here should have the same lack of respect for other people as they do. Having ‘fun’ doesn’t leave someone sobbing their heart out the next day/week/month/whatever… it’s really that simple.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't want to be on the receiving end of a phone call from an irate wife ever again. I took him at his word, his wife berated but enlightened me.

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

"Why is it the cardinal sin on here for some not to play with married/attached people?

Why shouldn't it be?

it was a question jeez "

So I answered your question... will you answer mine?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't play with married men. I don't go to parties or clubs so it's easier for me to vet.

For me it has nothing to do with morals but all to do with my fun. I'm worth more than a quickie between meetings and no bugger is coming into my home and tell me not to wear perfume.

Besides, I play rough. A married man isn't going to let you mark him! So I play with men that fulfil my needs: single men.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Why is it the cardinal sin on here for some not to play with married/attached people?

Why shouldn't it be?

it was a question jeez

So I answered your question... will you answer mine?"

Because to me who plays with married men I'm

doing nothing wrong and will continue doing so it's NSA sex nothing more not emotions so to me it's not a cardinal sin.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 03/03/11 22:08:00]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Why is it the cardinal sin on here for some not to play with married/attached people?"

I dont mind playing with married men as long as their wifes are aware and happy with the set up. I know its not always easy to know if guys are married or not wen your playing at parties/clubs etc

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

"Why is it the cardinal sin on here for some not to play with married/attached people?

Why shouldn't it be?

it was a question jeez

So I answered your question... will you answer mine?

Because to me who plays with married men I'm

doing nothing wrong and will continue doing so it's NSA sex nothing more not emotions so to me it's not a cardinal sin. "

I wasn't actually asking why you are not fussy about it, I was asking why you thought other people shouldn't think it is wrong.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Absolutely right, i am here to have fun not fit into his busy diary when he has a minute nor have my fun spoilt when his wife/partner rings wanting to know where he is as she and the kids have finished shopping and need a lift home. My idea of fun is with someone who is available, free and single just like me, and lets face it we dont have sex with everyone we meet, we choose to meet socially first see if there is a mutual attraction so you are right, respect for myself, my values, my choices and preferences, and ultimately his partner, something he has none for

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Never had that I can't see one leaving his wife for a tranny lol"

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

It's not compulsary to answer your questions all the time is it Polo? as some times I can't be arsed lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I do not see why its an issue.. I prefer married or attached men most of the time.. less hassle.. although they do need to be able to get out evenings.

Its not that I actively seek them, just if they happen to be it doesnt bother me.. its their life not mine.

Katie. x

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Haven't seen you online for a while Katie nice to see you back x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Haven't seen you online for a while Katie nice to see you back x"

I have been lurking.. not posting.. lol Been a little tied up

Katie. x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I love playing with a married man.... my husband

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We don`t want no part of someone married who hasn`t their partners consent ...and that gets complicatd at times ...so we avoid as best we can ...

To us ....although we seek nsa fun ...cheating almost invariably ends in tears and the deepest hurt...which ripple out into whole families and friends ....we don`t want any part of that thanks ....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't want to play with married men and have stated so. Don't do cheaters. Been cheated on so why would I do that to someone else. It's a horrible feeling and I'd hate to put someone else through that.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It is a really contentious issue. I have also been cheated on by a man and the hurt and anguish that it causes is horrific. The sense of betrayal and the lack of confidence and worthlessness it leaves you with is very destructive.

However I am on a swinging site, having threesomes and I go to clubs and invariably I have played with the married man.

I dont ever ask the question to playmates. I dont ask any personal questions about wives, children, money, cars, jobs because I dont want to know. Yes it is probably a bit of what I dont know wont play on my mind, but the other part of it is that I dont see playmates in the same way as i would a potential date or new relationship - all they are to me is a few hours of pleasure, and thats all I am to them.

If I ask they would lie and either say that they are definitely single or that they are married but the wife is a harridan who never gives him any love or kindness and invariably sex. Women know deep down its probably a lie but because they want to play, they bend the rules to suit their conscience. If a guy is incrediably hot and sexy, mid 30s to 40s and single and wants sex with you, sounds too good to be true, and it probably is.

Now I also wouldnt want to hurt another woman or put her through anguish, but I dont see that I am because it isnt me that has cheated on her, the blame solely lies with him. As women its easy to blame "the other woman", maybe shes waggled her tits at him and he just couldnt resist, maybe she begged and wore him down. If men are going to cheat they will and theres no amount of texting and phoning constantly, going on the internet searching for them, will make them stop. Its easier to look and blame the other woman than to look at ourselves and accept that he didnt want us. And ive been there and it damn well hurts I know but its an acceptance you have to come to terms with.

I have seen a lot of "well I wouldnt knowingly play with a married man but in a club I wouldnt ask" - that really is double standards. A building doesnt make it ok. If you have the morals and scruples that you all say you have in relation to marrieds, then dont go and play in clubs with any other men.

What i would never do, is overstep the mark whilst playing with a couple. I would never be "all over the other guy" to the point where I felt she was getting upset. That to me is deliberably hurting another woman. Maybe we have all done this as well. How do we know that when a couple have gone home, she hasnt been upset because she felt threatened by the situation. I constantly look for any negativity signs whilst playing with couples. It would hurt me greatly if a woman thought I was over the top with her man in this siutation.

But we may all hurt people unknowingly. Its hard to try and balance it all so it feels right

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

heres one for you married ladies..and guys to boot

your a wife who only wants sex once a month in the same old position, dont like oral either way or anything really to do with sex, so bascily you have sex just to keep the flag flying.

BUT,, hubby really loves his wife and family life, but is over frustrated at just having boring sex year in year out.

He has repeatedly asked her for more exciting sex but to no avail, So rather than leave her and upset their marraige, he seeks a more personal fullfilling side of his sex life that she will not provide, but at same time they remain married and nothing changes for the wife.

here goes, am ducking

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

looking through the profiles there are also plenty of married women on this site who are looking for nsa fun. are they treated differently?

At the end of the day were are all looking for nsa fun. It would only become an issue in my mind if it became a regular meet with the married person which increases the possibility of the hassle of any marital issues.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Knowingly helping someone to cheat is just as bad as cheating, you become a part of it all, note the word knowingly.

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

"Knowingly helping someone to cheat is just as bad as cheating, you become a part of it all, note the word knowingly."

Indeed.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"looking through the profiles there are also plenty of married women on this site who are looking for nsa fun. are they treated differently?

whats good for the goose is good for the gander!!!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

What happens if you find out AFTER sex he/she was married you didn't knowingly do it then. Remember some find out after a few meets not straightaway that they was married or attached.

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

" ...

There are no double standards in my moral code.

Where it happens is not the point.... it is how they came to be there.

There is a difference between me arranging to meet a cheat and a cheat being present somewhere I am playing.

If I agree to knowingly meet a cheat to play with them 1-2-1 or in a 3some, I am the reason they are going to lie to their partner on that day... I am without doubt part of the lie. I am the person who allowed them to visit.... I am the enabler. I am the person who encouraged them and allowed them into my home to cheat on their partner.... knowingly. I am giving consent to their actions, so I am in no position to say 'what you choose to do has nothing to do with me'... I am the reason it happened.

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

"Knowingly helping someone to cheat is just as bad as cheating, you become a part of it all, note the word knowingly."

Actually, thinking about this... are they as bad or are some in fact worse?

At least some of the cheats might feel guilty about what they have done at some point.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Its the moral intention .....that is important in regard to the " not knowingly play with " arguement ....

The intention of some Buddhist monks is not to harm other life forms ....they do of course ....but there intent was not to ..to the best of their ability ...its defines the way we can forgive mistakes we might make in an imperfect world....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

To us it's just so wrong. What goes around comes around we believe in Karma. This will come back to haunt you one day.

You carry on playing but beneath all of it your destroying lives.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

if i wasnt into swinging

and I caught my husband cheating i have to admit that i wud hunt the person down and give them the hiding of there life not to mention dumping his sorry arse

... and if i found out the girl knew he was married that wud make it worse

have some respect for people is how i wud see it

... the problem is you cant always spot a cheat on here or a married man ..

luckly my husband isnt like so many men on here and wudnt nob about behind my back ... if he wanted to play we wud do it together simple as

i have to admit if i ever caught him there wud be hell to pay AND for everyone involved ..

last time he pissed me off and we had a fight i threw a wooden carving thro his nice new cars window made me feel better until it cost me £70 to fix lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

That's me I'm not on here to justify who I sleep with whether they are married or not. I'm breaking no rules on fab by doing so either. At the end of the day I'm doing nothing wrong if others see that I am then that's their concern but I won't be losing any sleep over it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Crystal it says you won't meet cheaters but you don't play with your husband. He knows but doesn't play or come with you. That's cheating to me. Would you be happy if he was doing the same. It's good for you but probably not for him.

Me and Reno play together we make this a partnership. To me your a cheat.

Cecilia x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i understand that people are on here for NSA sex and at least married men/women you can almost guarentee that situation..

However i was chated on and was left devistated. I couldnt help particapte in a man cheating on his wife. I see it from her point of _iew if he were to ever get caught..

... im trusting all men on here to be honest and open with their situations of course haha!

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

"Crystal it says you won't meet cheaters but you don't play with your husband. He knows but doesn't play or come with you. That's cheating to me. Would you be happy if he was doing the same. It's good for you but probably not for him.

Me and Reno play together we make this a partnership. To me your a cheat.

Cecilia x"

How can that be cheating if everyone knows and are happy with it?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

he dusnt want too , and HE was the one who said why dont you join the site and meet guys

he knows every meet i go to he see;s photos and has chatted to one or two guys on the phone to confirm he is ok with it all

cheating is when someone dusnt know whats going on lol

if HE wanted to have sex with a woman i wud be cool with it But he dusnt want too ..... simple as !

if he ever wanted to join me i wud be more than happy for that also

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Me and Reno play together we make this a partnership. To me your a cheat.

Cecilia x"

I've heard some crap trap in my time but this tops it. I know lots who play with permission from their partners it's not cheating and most partners gets involved. How? They like to hear about it when the wife/hubby gets home. Then have sex. It happens.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Me and Reno play together we make this a partnership. To me your a cheat.

Cecilia x"

i cant force him to come with me that wud be rape

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By *atisfy janeWoman
over a year ago

Torquay

Me and Reno play together we make this a partnership. To me your a cheat.

Cecilia x"

What a load of rubbish, sorry but you really have very little idea if you believe this to be cheating.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Mmmmmm well I have been with and had a relationship with a married man ...... This is gonna sound proper mean now but here goes ...... Not once did I ever feel guilty or think about his wife when we was together it didnt even cross my mind and I still dont feel bad to this day ...... When she did find out about us she still stayed with him and we still carryed on seeing each other with out her knowing ...... In the end I told her that we was still seeing each other and guess what they is still together ...... He will do it again not with me tho thats over and done with But with someone else And I bet you any penny she will still stay with him if she found out ...... So in my eyes thats her own fault for letting him get away with it and not doing something bout it ...... Would I go with a married man. Again no I wasted two years of my life and it aint worth all the trouble ...... So yes I learnt me lesson

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

So Cecila are you saying you'd never swing without your other 1/2? Lots of couples have single profile too are they cheating as they choose not to take wifey on their meet. Total bollocks as I said stop worrying about what others are doing and concentrate on your own life Grrrrrrr

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sam has a single profile on here and I used to have one to ...... I 100% trust him that he wouldnt go and cheat on me and if he ever did then that be us over and he knows that ...... Anyways I no the password to his profile so I could check anytime if I wanted but like I said I trust him 100% so I have no need to look

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We will all do what we want to do, if we want to play with a guy we will. All this knowingly business - anyone who goes to a club and plays with men there knows the chances of it all being single guys with no baggage is very unlikely and your justifying it with the word knowingly. Can all of you honestly tell me that you ask him beforehand and ask for proof

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

In my opinion, if you are paying your money to get into a club, have sex with the guys in there without asking for proof of their marital status and checking that out too, as everyone will say no, then you are giving your consent.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Mmmmmm well I have been with and had a relationship with a married man ...... This is gonna sound proper mean now but here goes ...... Not once did I ever feel guilty or think about his wife when we was together it didnt even cross my mind and I still dont feel bad to this day ...... When she did find out about us she still stayed with him and we still carryed on seeing each other with out her knowing ...... In the end I told her that we was still seeing each other and guess what they is still together ...... He will do it again not with me tho thats over and done with But with someone else And I bet you any penny she will still stay with him if she found out ...... So in my eyes thats her own fault for letting him get away with it and not doing something bout it ...... Would I go with a married man. Again no I wasted two years of my life and it aint worth all the trouble ...... So yes I learnt me lesson "

Sounds to me you wanted more from this married man, and resent his wife for not getting shot of him so you could have him.

Why would you be so nasty as to tell her otherwise? You took it on yourself to waste two years pining after someone that wasn't free to you: telling the wife to share your self imposed misery is just not nice!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sounds to me you wanted more from this married man, and resent his wife for not getting shot of him so you could have him.

nods head in agreement.

why would you want to cause distress if the relationship was giving you everything you needed.

you may say more fool her, i say the possibility exists that what they had was strong enough for you to not infiltrate it.

that's gotta be a kick to the confidence...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sounds to me you wanted more from this married man, and resent his wife for not getting shot of him so you could have him.

Well said Sassy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

afraid we look at married men as cheating scum but hey thats our opinion

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

yes agree you belive what they say but i dnt meet on spure i speak for ages and get to know the person before meet anyone .but like you say you never know its all about trust innit

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

well my husband dusnt see me playing alone as cheating and after all thats all that matters to me !

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"well my husband dusnt see me playing alone as cheating and after all thats all that matters to me ! "

Don’t worry, neither will many, cheating involves lies and deceit, and you’re guilty of neither

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By *atisfy janeWoman
over a year ago

Torquay

"well my husband dusnt see me playing alone as cheating and after all thats all that matters to me ! "

You play to your own rules....not the rules of anyone else, and that is all that matters

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"well my husband dusnt see me playing alone as cheating and after all thats all that matters to me ! "

Hardly call it cheating if you and your husband are happy with it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There was alot more to it then that the only reason he whent back to his wife was because I said enough is enough .... Yeah maybe I shouldn't of gone back a told her but you can't change the pass can u

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I dont see it as a cardinal sin, afterall one is not going to sent to hell by the devil are they but for me, i just see them as having a significant other, not available, not free and not single, plenty of single guys that are available and free when i am

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sam has a single profile on here and I used to have one to ...... I 100% trust him that he wouldnt go and cheat on me and if he ever did then that be us over and he knows that ...... Anyways I no the password to his profile so I could check anytime if I wanted but like I said I trust him 100% so I have no need to look

I can honestly say that i wouldnt trust

ANY man again

But then i dont or wont put my entire trust in ANYONE.

Its called self preservation

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I can honestly say that i wouldnt trust

ANY man again

But then i dont or wont put my entire trust in ANYONE.

Its called self preservation

My ex-husband never cheated on me so I don't have any issues around that but I wouldn't be naïve to trust anybody 100%!

My youngest sister was convinced 100% her husband would never cheat or leave her: he cheated and left her!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I can honestly say that i wouldnt trust

ANY man again

But then i dont or wont put my entire trust in ANYONE.

Its called self preservation

My ex-husband never cheated on me so I don't have any issues around that but I wouldn't be naïve to trust anybody 100%!

My youngest sister was convinced 100% her husband would never cheat or leave her: he cheated and left her!"

A reason not to marry for me, all i see is people cheating and not trusting, but trusting, thinking they wont and they do

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Personally, I do not wish to help or encourage anyone to deceive his/her partner, hence I do not knowingly play with any gent that is in a significant relationship.

It is easier to vet peeps when meeting on a 1-1 basis, however, it is not so easy when attending clubs.

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

"That's me I'm not on here to justify who I sleep with whether they are married or not. I'm breaking no rules on fab by doing so either. At the end of the day I'm doing nothing wrong if others see that I am then that's their concern but I won't be losing any sleep over it"

Interesting that.... Hmmmm

People say this when they have never seen what happens... Because until you put a face or a voice or even just word of pain or anger attached to them, they are just another person.

And that's why the "not my problem" doesn't work in the real world when confronted with someone, because your actions do affect people...

It does become your problem when someone screams at you down the phone, it does become your problem when the person is looking at you eye to eye.

It does happen to real people in real life and we have all heard people tell stories that attest to that, people aren't as bulletproof as they like to think

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

And Fabio it's not happened to me I don't get that close to my meets or want to know their life story.

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

"And Fabio it's not happened to me I don't get that close to my meets or want to know their life story. "

Which is where the word "knowingly" comes back into the equation....

You can't claim "blissful ignorance" if you know... That then becomes a cold, calculated decision

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Which is where the word "knowingly" comes back into the equation....

You can't claim "blissful ignorance" if you know... That then becomes a cold, calculated decision

Agree. Now that I know someone I played with at a club is attached, it is unlikely I would play with him again if we meet again.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I can honestly say that i wouldnt trust

ANY man again

But then i dont or wont put my entire trust in ANYONE.

Its called self preservation

My ex-husband never cheated on me so I don't have any issues around that but I wouldn't be naïve to trust anybody 100%!

My youngest sister was convinced 100% her husband would never cheat or leave her: he cheated and left her!

A reason not to marry for me, all i see is people cheating and not trusting, but trusting, thinking they wont and they do"
he has never given me any reason not to trust him intill he does i WILL trust him 100% on my back so be it ... im far from naive i think if your in a relationship trust is a big thing if u aint got trust u aint got nothing ...thats what i think anyways

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I can honestly say that i wouldnt trust

ANY man again

But then i dont or wont put my entire trust in ANYONE.

Its called self preservation

My ex-husband never cheated on me so I don't have any issues around that but I wouldn't be naïve to trust anybody 100%!

My youngest sister was convinced 100% her husband would never cheat or leave her: he cheated and left her!

A reason not to marry for me, all i see is people cheating and not trusting, but trusting, thinking they wont and they do he has never given me any reason not to trust him intill he does i WILL trust him 100% on my back so be it ... im far from naive i think if your in a relationship trust is a big thing if u aint got trust u aint got nothing ...thats what i think anyways "

I agree with you. I trusted my husband, as I said he never cheated, never gave me cause for concern. Would I, do I trust anybody 100% though? No! Hell, can't even vouch for myself 100%!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"This time last year i was falling to bits because i'd found this site in the history of my own laptop, which the man i wanted to spend my life with had been using while i'd been away for a weekend. I spent several weeks using the site to see when he was online - while i was in bed mostly, torturing myself trying to decide what to do. Sad i guess but i hoped he was just using it to look at pics and hoped i'd learn to turn a blind eye to it. One day he left it logged in and i found the full extent of his use and frankly the bottom fell out of my world. I'd never knowingly want to be a part of putting anyone else through that. "

a salutory tale indeed

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

let's face it there must be loads of cheats about both male and female as marriage is not the only relationship these days.

the only way to avoid it is to play with couples and even then, how do you know they are not already both cheating on each of their relationships?

it's a conundrum indeed.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Something i wouldn't do or condone

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

something I wouldn't do even with a condom.

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