FabSwingers.com forum: Zombie Apocalypse!

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Scenario: The streets are full of living dead, people are running for their lives or holed up in their homes, and worse, the zombies have brought the infected from 28 Days Later with them!

So, what item in your house will you arm yourself with?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm one of the infected! The lurgy had me!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Cillit Bang. Barry Scott says it kills 99.9% of all germs

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My Daughters hamster its a cunt

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By *andS33Couple
over a year ago

Yorkshire

"Cillit Bang. Barry Scott says it kills 99.9% of all germs

Hehe

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm at the top floor of my electronically solar powered panic room..I have hydroponics,chickens,fish, a helicopter,gatling gun,grenades, some hot fanny..

enjoy being feasted on..peasants

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Cillit Bang. Barry Scott says it kills 99.9% of all germs

Great answer

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By *otsoSnowWhiteWoman
over a year ago

My Ice Castle! South Wales

"My Daughters hamster its a cunt

That really made me laugh

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By *elloWoman
over a year ago

alpha centauri

I'll arm myself with my elderly neighbour because I can run fast than her so hopefully she'll occupy the infected so I can escape

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm at the top floor of my electronically solar powered panic room..I have hydroponics,chickens,fish, a helicopter,gatling gun,grenades, some hot fanny..

enjoy being feasted on..peasants"

I'm with this guy

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By *inaTitzTV/TS
over a year ago

Titz Towers, North Notts

I'd be busy enrolling the Zombies in my scheme to take over the world.

However, I live in Mansfield and frankly it would take two weeks of Zombie Apocalypse before anyone noticed anything out of the normal.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm at the top floor of my electronically solar powered panic room..I have hydroponics,chickens,fish, a helicopter,gatling gun,grenades, some hot fanny..

enjoy being feasted on..peasants

I'm with this guy

was it the hot fanny that won you over?..some are zombies mind..nothing like fucking a maggot infested writhing fanny..allegedly

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'd be busy enrolling the Zombies in my scheme to take over the world.

However, I live in Mansfield and frankly it would take two weeks of Zombie Apocalypse before anyone noticed anything out of the normal.

I'm in Devon so it'd probably take the victims three days longer than anywhere else to get around to developing symptoms..

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By *hooter McGavinMan
over a year ago

Exeter

I have a baseball bat and a whole bag of golf clubs, I'm going all 6 iron on their dead asses ??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'd head to my back bedroom spend a minute or two deciding which gun to get out... Definitely grab my compound bow and my 6d cell maglite! Failing that grab my work keys and go and fabricate something gruesome! Lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I have a baseball bat and a whole bag of golf clubs, I'm going all 6 iron on their dead asses ??"

Yeah don't use a 7 iron it's too handy I'd probably waste my 4 iron I never use it!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'd blend in

However, should that fail, there's the curtain rail, weights and a few other tricks up my sleeve... However, I'd be the distraction so others can escape

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 22/08/15 22:30:58]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have already made a poa. I throw myself at the mercy of the infected while my family escape. I can't run and there's a lot of flesh for the infected zombies to munch through,giving my family a bit of a head start. To give them extra time I may fight back with a few stabs with a kitchen knife or two. I can't lift anything much bigger.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm at the top floor of my electronically solar powered panic room..I have hydroponics,chickens,fish, a helicopter,gatling gun,grenades, some hot fanny..

enjoy being feasted on..peasants

I'm with this guy

was it the hot fanny that won you over?..some are zombies mind..nothing like fucking a maggot infested writhing fanny..allegedly"

Nope I just like chicken

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Fill your bath tub with water and knock out your stairs. Zombies can't climb and don't live that long. Your water supply will be shut off so you drink the water you have in the tub!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'll grab my bow and the swords; the nail gun too.

Plus, the trusty crowbar. Of all else fails, it's time to get Gordon Freeman on their undead ass's....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Looking around me all I can see is a broken floor buffer and an iron. I don't recall ever seeing a zombie buffed or ironed to death.

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By *hooter McGavinMan
over a year ago

Exeter

"I have a baseball bat and a whole bag of golf clubs, I'm going all 6 iron on their dead asses ??

Yeah don't use a 7 iron it's too handy I'd probably waste my 4 iron I never use it!! "

For me my 6 is my go to club, I run it in punch it in and tackle the 180 to 210 yard shots with it, tee up higher and come in under it

So I would be smashing some top-flights and pinnacles at those undead bastards lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There's some on here who would try fucking them!

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By *atEvolutionCouple
over a year ago

atlantisEVOLUTION Swingers Club. Stoke

"My Daughters hamster its a cunt

lmao

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"My Daughters hamster its a cunt

I'd be grabbing my teddy and throwing myself to the zombies... zombie girl here I come!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I have a baseball bat and a whole bag of golf clubs, I'm going all 6 iron on their dead asses ??

Yeah don't use a 7 iron it's too handy I'd probably waste my 4 iron I never use it!!

For me my 6 is my go to club, I run it in punch it in and tackle the 180 to 210 yard shots with it, tee up higher and come in under it

So I would be smashing some top-flights and pinnacles at those undead bastards lol "

All about the titleist pro90 for me well it used to be my ball. To be fair I'd waste any club on them apart from my 56' wedge!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"My Daughters hamster its a cunt

Ha ha love it

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By *isdirtygirlCouple
over a year ago

somewhere out there

"My Daughters hamster its a cunt

That really made me laugh"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"My Daughters hamster its a cunt

That really made me laugh

DG"
im not joking,its a complete savage

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Seriously all depends on how hot and how mouldy these zombies are.. your going to get caught eventually so best go out in style

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Scenario: The streets are full of living dead, people are running for their lives or holed up in their homes, and worse, the zombies have brought the infected from 28 Days Later with them!

So, what item in your house will you arm yourself with?"

Well as I have an extensive arsenal ready for just such an occasion.

Would have to be spartan spear. Good for close up and far away

Die zombie muther fuckers!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A light sabre would be my choice or a trusty blaster

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A foam pop gun

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A cricket bat is quite functional according to Shaun of the dead

Vinyls make a good substitute for shurikens

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"A cricket bat is quite functional according to Shaun of the dead

Vinyls make a good substitute for shurikens

Ain't no one throwing my Thunderbirds picture disc at no walking dead!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm taking over R.A.F Sealand.... It's got big arse fences and looks pretty safe

Saying that....doubt I'd notice the difference...alkies,smackheads and weirdos so prolific around here... Who can tell who's off their face or a zombie?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The ark of the covenant from Raiders would be my choice as it could wipe them all out in a second

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Plus, the trusty crowbar. Of all else fails, it's time to get Gordon Freeman on their undead ass's....

Any idea what the half-life is for a zombie?!

I think we have some bb guns in the house... won't do much though!

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By *iamondjoeMan
over a year ago

Glastonbury

I'd arm my self with a stiff White Russian and take a long bath

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"The ark of the covenant from Raiders would be my choice as it could wipe them all out in a second"
failing this the good old shotgun and trusty magnum

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By *iamondjoeMan
over a year ago

Glastonbury

A copy of The Bible

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Straight to the safe. Shotguns

my 10 gauge for me and the rest of you can divvy up the rest, next to the gun shop with the 4x4 and a length of Chain to rip the window bars off and load up with ammo....

Down to the steel fabricators after that to do an A team on the navara and plate the windows over etc....

Been my plan for years

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've got an over/under 12 gauge and a few thousand rounds, I'll see how long that lasts me. Who's bunkering in at our gaff then for a post apocalyptic orgy?

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By *iamondjoeMan
over a year ago

Glastonbury

One nuclear bomb

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My compound bow, hatchets and a crowbar.

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By *iamondjoeMan
over a year ago

Glastonbury

A King Tiger panzer... that'll do it, 'till I run out of petrol and ammo

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I've got an over/under 12 gauge and a few thousand rounds, I'll see how long that lasts me. Who's bunkering in at our gaff then for a post apocalyptic orgy? "

Does the fact I can bring a safe full of shotguns,from 410 up to 10 buy me an invite?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I've got an over/under 12 gauge and a few thousand rounds, I'll see how long that lasts me. Who's bunkering in at our gaff then for a post apocalyptic orgy?

Does the fact I can bring a safe full of shotguns,from 410 up to 10 buy me an invite?

"
depends......are you a good shot?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have given this some deep thought everytime I watch a zombie movie. My weapons of choice are as follows

1) Some kind of big 'eff off' shotgun

2) big scary machete

3) chainsaw

4) big 'effin' sharp knives

5) petrol bombs

Also I would sport a cool leather jacket while delivering witty punch lines as I decapitate the undead! This is my boom stick

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I've got an over/under 12 gauge and a few thousand rounds, I'll see how long that lasts me. Who's bunkering in at our gaff then for a post apocalyptic orgy?

Does the fact I can bring a safe full of shotguns,from 410 up to 10 buy me an invite?

depends......are you a good shot?"

Surgical

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By *iamondjoeMan
over a year ago

Glastonbury

King Tiger wins, deffo

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My recurve bows, plenty of arrows, my katana, and my brush hook for when it gets up close and dirty. Load them all in to my truck and go rescue loved ones, then back to mine to huncker down.... kinda looking forward to it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Pick up Liz, go round to mums, kill Phil, go The Winchester, have a nice cold pint and wait for it all to blow over.

How's that for a slice of fried gold?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Pick up Liz, go round to mums, kill Phil, go The Winchester, have a nice cold pint and wait for it all to blow over.

How's that for a slice of fried gold?"

Just dont forget the cornettos

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Joins Citizen "Z" on North Pole...loads of food, heating and Zombies will freeze till they get there...But on other hand Leeds is Sex Zombie Land already so no difference

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm just going to turn Jeremy Kyle onto the TV. It'll convince zombies outside that no one alive would be inside my house watching it. I'll then promptly sleep with all my families partners go on the show in white trackie bottoms and become one too.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Anything I can make from the tables/chairs etc.

And then be really quiet.

Bad idea to go zombie killing though.

Wait for the infected to starve and the zombies to rot.

There'll also be humans that you'll have to contend with.

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By *rab74Man
over a year ago

Huntingdon

I can sail. Head for the coast, stock up on fishing kit, nick a boat, job done. Then just wait for the zombies to fall apart in their own time. I'll take a Halberg-Rassy with all the trimmings over your solar penthouse, any day of the week.

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By *ngel n tedCouple
over a year ago

maidstone

I'm heading to leeds castle, or traffic police station with a table leg, until i find something shootable

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Scenario: The streets are full of living dead, people are running for their lives or holed up in their homes, and worse, the zombies have brought the infected from 28 Days Later with them!

So, what item in your house will you arm yourself with?"

Bogroll, I'd be shitting myself. You've got to admire my honesty.

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By *layfullsamMan
over a year ago

Solihull

"Scenario: The streets are full of living dead, people are running for their lives or holed up in their homes, and worse, the zombies have brought the infected from 28 Days Later with them!

So, what item in your house will you arm yourself with?"

I see you've visited blackpool recently

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By *lashheartMan
over a year ago

shrewsbury

[Removed by poster at 23/08/15 16:02:54]

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By *lashheartMan
over a year ago

shrewsbury

My dog for early warning.

Some head height razor wire (wire out of my mig welder) across the doors.

Barricade the stairs with the doors from downstairs.

Several bats - base ball, cricket, all modded with long spikes as in z nation.

Rechargeable hedge trimmer.

And I really want a banjo like woody harrelson uses in zombie land. You have to keep a sense of humour..

(Yes I have put a lot of thought into this)

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By *estivalMan
over a year ago

borehamwood

Would have to be my chain saw or pop round my neighbours and grab his crossbow

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A tin opener.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have an army of flies..ready to feast on the festering

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By *uperGuy68Man
over a year ago

Southampton

I'll play Westlife at full blast , they'll either move on or their heads will explode like in Mars Attacks!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'll play Westlife at full blast , they'll either move on or their heads will explode like in Mars Attacks!

or we just point to u and say "its his", then they eat you.

start of the zombie peace treaty

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Anyone else read The Zombie Survival Guide by Max Brooks?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yup, and that's why I'm taking a crowbar to the apocalypse!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Samurai sword, baseball bat, chainsaw, in addition to my kink bag, that's got loads of useful stuff in it including enough lubricant to make sure nothing living or dead stay on their feet, rope, hand cuffs and a bull whip

The hardest thing about being caught up in a zombie apocalypse, is trying not to look so fucking chuffed about it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Samurai sword, baseball bat, chainsaw, in addition to my kink bag, that's got loads of useful stuff in it including enough lubricant to make sure nothing living or dead stay on their feet, rope, hand cuffs and a bull whip

The hardest thing about being caught up in a zombie apocalypse, is trying not to look so fucking chuffed about it"

Your sword will break/blunt if it's not high quality, your bat will break, your chainsaw is loud and requires fuel.

Might wanna rethink your weapon choices.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The hardest thing about being caught up in a zombie apocalypse, is trying not to look so fucking chuffed about it

Your sword will break/blunt if it's not high quality, your bat will break, your chainsaw is loud and requires fuel.

Might wanna rethink your weapon choices."

No issues with my kink bag though eh

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

People who choose chainsaws to face zombies have not thought it through!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"People who choose chainsaws to face zombies have not thought it through!"

It worked out for Ash in the Evil Dead

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The hardest thing about being caught up in a zombie apocalypse, is trying not to look so fucking chuffed about it

Your sword will break/blunt if it's not high quality, your bat will break, your chainsaw is loud and requires fuel.

Might wanna rethink your weapon choices.

No issues with my kink bag though eh

Rope, cuffs, and bull whip will be useful.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We're safe, we have no brain cells. The Vodka did it's job.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We're safe, we have no brain cells. The Vodka did it's job."

Zombies eat flesh, the infected will infect you if they don't turn you into smush.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We must have watched the wrong movies. We thought they only wanted brains.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We must have watched the wrong movies. We thought they only wanted brains."

Have you ever seen walking dead/Zombieland/any zombie film?

They eat the flesh.

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By *lashheartMan
over a year ago

shrewsbury

I remember a few films from years ago where they all wandered round going "braaaaaiiiiinnnnnnssssss" and just wanted to eat brains. All the recent ones are flesh eaters

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Return of the Living Dead. We think. ( Oh and most recently I Zombie.)Oh well, We guess we're going to be Pickled Zombie Bunnies.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Return of the Living Dead. We think. ( Oh and most recently I Zombie.)Oh well, We guess we're going to be Pickled Zombie Bunnies.

I've not seen iZombie.

The premise just sounded daft.

Reminded me of Warm Bodies.

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