FabSwingers.com forum: Shortest Fab Meet?

By *aldy321 OP Man
5 days ago

Huddersfield

What's your shortest Fab meet? Had a recent one that was probably less than 30 seconds. Not the best for a confidence boost

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By *erdyHollyTV/TS
5 days ago

In a galaxy far far away

I took about an hour and a half to get ready.

He arrived, cum within 5mins of me sucking him.

He left

Devastated

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By *exyScientistsCouple
5 days ago

Castlebar

About 5 mins (although he was 20mins late) Coffee meet. He asked was he my type. I said no, and he downed his drink and said I was missing out big time. Then walked out.

The meet was about 4.5 mins too long tbh

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By *asty tatsyMan
5 days ago

london

Think she was 5”1 😁

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By *rafter69Man
5 days ago

upminster

"About 5 mins (although he was 20mins late) Coffee meet. He asked was he my type. I said no, and he downed his drink and said I was missing out big time. Then walked out.

The meet was about 4.5 mins too long tbh"

That tickled me 😂

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By *aldy321 OP Man
5 days ago

Huddersfield

"About 5 mins (although he was 20mins late) Coffee meet. He asked was he my type. I said no, and he downed his drink and said I was missing out big time. Then walked out.

The meet was about 4.5 mins too long tbh"

I arrived chivalrously early. Got out of the car and didn’t get to a coffee. Apparently I wasn't fat enough

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By *earditallWoman
5 days ago

Lancaster

About 5 mins,he was a lot older than he stated and about 6 inches shorter.

I decided to leave after letting him knoow he shouldn't lie on his profile.

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By *iver78Man
5 days ago

barton upon humber

[Removed by poster at 10/08/26 13:49:39]

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By *eralDeviantWoman
5 days ago

Hull

Hmm definitely less than 5 mins.

We had socialed and meet twice previously.

I was in a local cafe enjoying a coffee. He turned on the charm and we arranged to meet, leave the door open for him to come straight in arrangement, hell be half hour.

Walked home (15mins) Showered, sexy lingerie (20mins) and dug out the blind fold.

Knelt in the hallway, blindfolded and slipped into meditation occasionally interjected with thoughts of 'geez how long is he going to be'

He eventually arrived, burst through the door apologising for traffic then saw me.

Got his cock out, clearly didnt enjoy any aspect of it being in my mouth. I actually think id already had him in my throat when he pulled back and said he thought it would be funny to just leave now... And he did

I was back in the coffee shop within 90mins of leaving it

Its kinda funny.. Years later but barely

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By *iver78Man
5 days ago

barton upon humber

About 30 seconds , she opend the door and I saw the state of the hallway smelt the sweaty sock cent of and what im assuming was dog or car pee , turned and left

Was kinda shocked as her pics and profile led me to think she was a classy sort of lady , elegant pics nice profile and sounded nice on the phone .

Also arranged to meet a lady in a pub , as i walked in I clocked her saw she was a good 10 stone bigger than her pics ( and no thats not an exaggeration) and just walked past straight out the other one , and instantly blocked her , she is still on this site and still has the same pics up with athletic on her profile 😀

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By *gent CoulsonMan
5 days ago

Secret hideaway in the pennines

A while ago, arranged to meet at a costa, got there about 10 mins early, she arrived, looked stunning, went to give her a hug and she smelt of , knocked me sick, apologised to her saying I had just had a call from work and had to leave,

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By *hickthighs-26Woman
5 days ago

the land of vagina

I actually havnt had a really short meet before even if we havnt gelled we have still enjoyed a drink or whatever.

Some of these stories make me lose faith in humans it sounds awful 🙈

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By *rMrs DelightCouple
5 days ago

Wigan

Around 15 mins. We had sex, finished, had a chat, a few drinks and then went for round 2 which lasted just under an hour

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By *offee27Man
5 days ago

Wiltshire

About 10 minutes.

She gave a time to be at hers, door was unlocked. 1 guy was already fucking her, I stripped off as he was finishing then gave her pussy a quick lick, fucked her for about 2 minutes before I cum deep in her sloppy pussy.

Dressed and out the door within another 2 as she layed there waiting for the next man

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By *kphooey43Man
5 days ago

Barnet

Ugh. Some of these are horrendous.i've been lucky.

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By *inkPomPomWoman
5 days ago

Isle of Man

I had one that was around 30 minutes long and I had to make him get in my shower because his feet smelled so bad

Did not bang 🩷

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By *rMrs DelightCouple
5 days ago

Wigan

"I had one that was around 30 minutes long and I had to make him get in my shower because his feet smelled so bad

Did not bang 🩷"

At least it wasn’t his willy 😂 x

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By *i oral subMan
5 days ago

Chilton

30 seconds. Turned up to this guys house, he obviously lied on his profile as he was about 80 could hardly walk and was wearingincontinence pants, the smell of piss coming from the house was awful. I left hurriedly!

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By *actile TensionMan
5 days ago

Sussex

Ive witnessed minutes meets in clubs -They say hello, pop for a drink and ate never to be seen again.

Personally, 40min pint of Guinness social

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By *uckMe12FreeMan
5 days ago

(User no longer on site)

About 5 minutes. Rocked up to her flat, it was a right shit hole so I left. I've mentioned this story on many occasions.

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By *ersatilefoxMan
5 days ago

Notts

"I took about an hour and a half to get ready.

He arrived, cum within 5mins of me sucking him.

He left

Devastated"

Why not wait for round two.

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By *ustus5555Woman
5 days ago

Nottingham

Can match you op.

Though the door lasted all of 30 seconds & gone. Truly dire

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By *vmarisaTV/TS
5 days ago

Motherwell

3 minutes, I had previously sucked him off twice before and our 3rd meeting he asked to fuck me, I had just rolled a large ribbed condom onto his cock and he came immediately in the condom, he was so crest fallen and I felt so embarrassed for him , told him not to worry about it and I will see him the following week as usual, never saw him again, sadly, as he had potential. Mx 👿🍆💦💋

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By *igBeardyDanMan
5 days ago

Bilston

Ive never met anyone of here all my meets are from club visits

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By *ew year new nameWoman
5 days ago

Bolton

About a minute. He looked nothing like his pic which was athletic with a 6pack. He was a little chubby guy, Said it was an old pic but i wasnt even sure it was him. I messaged a woman who worked at the club that gave him a veri. She said he didnt have that pic on when she veried him and he was indeed a chubster. What did he expect to happen when I saw him lol

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By *hunky GentMan
5 days ago

Ely

She was 4'11". 😆

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By *eltCuteMightDeleteWoman
5 days ago

Reading

Oh wow, I feel so sad reading these.

Mine wasn't so bad. Met up in a pub. He already knew I didn't drink alcohol. We chatted for 5 minutes about football and then for the next 20 minutes he tried to remember every pub he'd been to in the town that I live in. It was painful and I couldn't help him with any of the names, nor did I care. Quickly downed my Pepsi and left.

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By *hunky GentMan
5 days ago

Ely

"Oh wow, I feel so sad reading these.

I'd prefer the talk with you about your underwear collection 😉

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By *bwwifesharerCouple
5 days ago

Coventry

30 seconds after we sat down! the smell of his BO was overpowering..nope not for us

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By *olvesxcoupleCouple
5 days ago

Round the bend

Don't think we've had anything less than about 3 hours

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By *ittlemissFlirtyCouple
5 days ago

The bottom of the River Ankh

0 minutes as they didn't bother turning up! 🤣🤣

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By *ornyguy666Man
5 days ago

Nottingham

O mins Didn't turn up it was fake and scam

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By *herrybakewellCouple
5 days ago

Staffordshire

There's been a couple that I've had s coffee social with that just didnt turn up....so that was somewhat short.

Mrs.

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By *ackformore100Man
5 days ago

Tin town

Some of these are funny but sad at the same time.. Chalk them up to experience and part of life's rich tapestry. Or soiled dirty rag.

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By *elboy1978Man
5 days ago

Jarrow

I’ve never had a meet of here

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By *dible_KinkCouple
5 days ago

Aberdeen

Our meets are generally full length affairs, but one time only we had a guy at lunchtime. He was supposed to shower then come to us to join our already in-progress session. So we were at it when he eventually turned up, unshowered. He joined in reeking of BO, mustered two pumps then a squirt. Got up and shot out the door not even full dressed. The whole episode lasted about 5 mins. Basically a horrific interruption to an otherwise Fabulous mid-day session.

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By *inkPomPomWoman
5 days ago

Isle of Man

"I had one that was around 30 minutes long and I had to make him get in my shower because his feet smelled so bad

Did not bang 🩷

At least it wasn’t his willy 😂 x"

It wasn't funny it was disgusting

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By *otwifecouple1004Couple
5 days ago

Cardiff

Had 2 that was all of 30 seconds. That includes taking off trousers and putting back on.

One of them messaged shortly after apologising. And left the website

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By *issEmmWoman
5 days ago

Bournemouth

It was definitely less than ten minutes. As he was putting his pants on he said ‘I should have just asked the taxi to wait’ like he knew he was going to be disappointing

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By *eautyandthebeast86Couple
5 days ago

Somewhere in Norfolk ask :)

5 mins, it was at a club and a couple asked to go to a private room. I was nervous as this was our first ever club attendance and first ever couple to play with in a club setting.

Kissed the woman which was great, go to get the man’s cock out and I kid you not it was less than 3 inches, it was a micro cock and apparently fully erect.

My partner saw the look on my face and I did try and touch it but touching it made me even less horny.

I can’t even remember how we managed to leave so suddenly but I think my partner made some excuse and we were out of that room before we had even got naked!

Also another time on a social we only stayed for 30 mins because the couple looked nothing like their pictures one had no teeth and they had made no effort at all. Not for us!

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By *oleraine-coupleCouple
5 days ago

Coleraine

Two minutes

Invited a guy over to ours for a social after weeks of chat. He was nothing like his pictures in any way that were clearly not him. Told to leave at the door. Weird how anyone would think this might work out well.

Next shortest was a couples meet. We had all had a great social two weeks before and felt excited for a great meeting. However the wife of the couple in question lost the plot big time within 20 mins of arriving now the reality of sex being on the cards and we realised her hubby had pressured her into it all. Her hubby was gutted and we are like WTF.

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By *jslookingforfunMan
5 days ago

liverpool

I’ve not had what you’d call a short meet but I have had one that should have been, I should have ran as soon as she opened her front door

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By *uck-PuppetWoman
5 days ago

Sheffield

Shortest was under a minute due to dishonesty and deceit.

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By *xSuitedandBootedxxMan
5 days ago

Market Harborough

Did your husband turn up

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By *lli1234TV/TS
5 days ago

Conway

2 minutes walked into her flat and it resembled a crack house and stinking I said you got to be kidding me and walked off.

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By *atinaChica54Woman
5 days ago

Marlborough

Met in a pub, after I'd spent the usual age of getting ready, 30 min drive there....

Saw him at the bar, said "Hello" to each other & his halitosis hit me like a frigging freight train!🤢

I just downed my drink & said "not for me" & promptly left....

I did a Nicholas Cage.....

Gone in 60 Seconds!🏃🏽‍♀️🏃🏽‍♀️

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By *elvet RopeMan
5 days ago

by the big field

Zero minutes!

Arranged to meet a woman in the hotel adjacent to the one I was stopping in, asked what room should I come to and went to clean my teeth and add a dab of the old fragrant water.

Came back for the answer- which was she’d had a message from a guy in the same hotel and he could get there quicker, so she’d cancelled

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By *hunky GentMan
5 days ago

Ely

"Met in a pub, after I'd spent the usual age of getting ready, 30 min drive there....

Saw him at the bar, said "Hello" to each other & his halitosis hit me like a frigging freight train!🤢

I just downed my drink & said "not for me" & promptly left....

I did a Nicholas Cage.....

Gone in 60 Seconds!🏃🏽‍♀️🏃🏽‍♀️"

Vroom, vroom. 😆

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By *ccasionallyNaughtyWoman
5 days ago

Nearby

Hosted a naughty gathering at mine some years ago and one guy turned up having given it all the big talk about what a seasoned party-goer he was, could play for hours, "dominant" etc - my friend started undressing him and he blew his load whilst she was unzipping his jeans, soaked thru his boxers, and then rushed out the door apologising 🤣

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By *tu.xMan
5 days ago

around

No never. ive had no show well i think she didn't show or did she it might have been her quickest but didn't know about it 😆

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By *olvesxcoupleCouple
5 days ago

Round the bend

"Zero minutes!

Arranged to meet a woman in the hotel adjacent to the one I was stopping in, asked what room should I come to and went to clean my teeth and add a dab of the old fragrant water.

Came back for the answer- which was she’d had a message from a guy in the same hotel and he could get there quicker, so she’d cancelled

Jaysus

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By *entleman JayMan
5 days ago

Leeds

I planned on meeting a couple in a pub local to me. They were travelling well over an hour to get there. I was walking there. I got a message from them during what would have been their journey, saying how they were looking forward to meeting.

I was five minutes late and as I walked in, they were walking out. He said “hello you must be Jay, I’m sorry the missus isn’t feeling it tonight? They got in the car and left.

Funnily enough, that same pub was the venue for another disaster story, too long to tell here. Lol.

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By *arbonaraKingMan
5 days ago

Leeds

A few hours. Been on here in the past met a few people. Me and the other person do our due diligence so when we meet up, we are who we say, we fit the descriptions in our profiles and pictures and have a good social or more.

Sometimes you have to blame yourself for picking an absolute potato. Accept that

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By *obertjMan
5 days ago

Birmingham

A really fascinating discussion! Underscores the importance of meeting socially first

I had a few no shows..just wish they didn’t happen

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By *aven.Woman
5 days ago

About an hour, I met him in John lewis and managed to swerve him the homeware section and legged it for the lift .

True story.

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By *imi_RougeWoman
5 days ago

Hampshire

Think the quickest was 38 minutes. From him turning up at the door, quick kiss, upstairs for sex and then calling him a cab 😂

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
5 days ago

Central

About 20 seconds. He just about got his cock out and came. Then said he had to go

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By *enrietteandSamCouple
5 days ago

;)

This one time when she didn’t stay for breakfast.

It worked out ok, there were only two avocados left when I opened the fridge.

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By *oldmilkMan
5 days ago

In trouble, apparently…

About six hours.

Half way through, she made me a rocket and cheese sandwich to keep me going. One of her dogs swiped it off my plate while I wasn’t watching and ate it in one bite.

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By *riel13Woman
5 days ago

Northampton

From him stepping through the door to leaving, probably about 5 minutes 10 at a push... He came twice in that time... Was so embarrassed he had to leave, bless him

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By *_v0102Man
5 days ago

london

4/5 years ago when I was still at uni (and before I ever had any meets) I was on here and received a message from a couple stating they were looking for a massage and if I was available. It was 11 at night and I was excited that a couple wanted to meet I immediately said yes, freshened up and called an uber.

When I reached theirs I was so nervous and didn’t know what to do/how to act but they were lovely And started to initiate. Then the Mrs took me to the bedroom while mr was still outside. We were in there for a while, I ate her out and she was sucking my dick but I just couldn’t stop feeling a sense of guilt and felt bad for the mr.

I had to apologise and left after like 10 minutes..

I still think back at it and wish I wasn’t such a pussy because they were a lovely couple and we got on quite well. Obviously after that there were no messages. Still miss them to this day 🥀

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By *infulstrangersCouple
5 days ago

Plymouth

Was a BJ cum n go last 34 seconds. Complete waste of time

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By *ild_oatsMan
5 days ago

the land of saints & sinners

Not sure if this counts.

A few years ago I messaged a local lady as she was online and was only about 1/2 mile away on the chance we could strike up a conversation with a view to a future meet.

Less than 20 minutes later I was at her house and had her knickers off and my cock was in her mouth…

The sex was really quick but she keeps inviting me back….

Who am I to refuse such nice offers from a lady…

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By *ordl97Man
5 days ago

Andover

Wasnt a fab meet, but met up with a young woman a couple years ago (she was 23years old) picked her up, started driving to a quiet location, she proceeded to roll a joint, and went to smoke it, i dropped her ass back off home, less than 10 mins

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By *ornyguy666Man
4 days ago

Nottingham

"About an hour, I met him in John lewis and managed to swerve him the homeware section and legged it for the lift .

True story. "
ha ha good girl

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By *ornyguy666Man
4 days ago

Nottingham

"From him stepping through the door to leaving, probably about 5 minutes 10 at a push... He came twice in that time... Was so embarrassed he had to leave, bless him "
didn't him make the movie gone in 60 seconds lol

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By *ornyguy666Man
4 days ago

Nottingham

"0 minutes as they didn't bother turning up! 🤣🤣"
I had the same problem

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By *ee1967Man
4 days ago

Dunstable

met a couple early last year for a drink. And then we arranged to come to my flat. we started to watch porn sitting next to each other. And she started to wank him off and suck him off. And he came in about three minutes. then he said, oh well, that's spoiled the evening, hasn't it? And they stayed for about half an hour then they left.

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By *aretobareCouple
4 days ago

Central Portugal

The first single guy we met together - many, many moons ago now was so nervous he was like a human vibrator - asked him to go after 20 minutes as we didn't fancy calling an ambulance. When I (Mrs) was on as a single even longer ago, one guy came into the cafe sat opposite me, shaking, said"I can't do it" and left - probably about 20 seconds. We don't meet single guys now.

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By *orphia2003Woman
4 days ago

Tonypandy.

Agreed to meet a woman I'd been chatting to online. We had exchanged face pics.

'She' out to be a much older man. When questioned, he was using face pics of his adult daughter, and had been scared to say anything in case I wouldn't meet.

Drained my drink and left.

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By *engali DelightMan
4 days ago

somewhere

Basically 0 minutes, turned out to be a scam and didn’t turn up. My dumbass waited there for 10-15 minutes. Never again.

I guess we all learn from a fab canon event.

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By *unseeker0974Man
4 days ago

Kent

As others have reported 0s - I’ve had the no shows too

But the shortest actual meet was 30 seconds

He opened the door - wasn’t the guy in the profile pic and the smell that came from the house!!!

Not a word said - I’m afraid I just walked away stunned

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By *heSuccubusWoman
4 days ago

Darlington

10 minutes.... and I burned my mouth!!

He sent a few black and white pics and he looked quite handsome so arranged a coffee date. I was stood outside the cafe and a tiny, buck toothed little guy, carrying a Roy Cropper style shopping bag (I'm 5ft2 and he was shorter than me), tapped me on the back ans announced with jazz hands that he was my date!!

I was so taken a back I went into the cafe. He had lied about his age, height, general appearance and I'm quite sure the black and white shots were to pull the wool about his ethnicity too.

He was so hyperactive! I'm not sure if it was nerves or excitement. When he started to talk in great detail about the vermin issues in his area of town I decided id down the coffee and make an excuse..... but it was bloody boiling!!! After 10 minutes I made an excuse and left.

He messaged an hour later saying what a great time hed had and he really felt a connection! I said I didn't think his profile and photos were a true reflection of him, to which he told me hed used his cousins photo because he didn't have any of him and everyone says they're very similar!!

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