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"My legs arnt enthusiastic enough and i know he loves reverse cowgirl "The last train to funky town has already left due to bank holiday schedules.. | |||
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"My legs arnt enthusiastic enough and i know he loves reverse cowgirl "Your younger than my daughter | |||
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"My legs arnt enthusiastic enough and i know he loves reverse cowgirl
Your younger than my daughter "I just stuffed my face with a different brand of sausage | |||
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"I’m so confused!" I cba explaining how’s it works to another man | |||
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"I don't like warm colours in kingerie" Profile is angled towards BBW and large breasts | |||
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"I don't like warm colours in kingerie Profile is angled towards BBW and large breasts" But she never got me the bounty cheesecake she promised | |||
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"He'd ghost me right after 😭" My foof is on hunger strike | |||
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"Them boobs look amazing "I'd be scared you donked me on the head with that and knocked me out  | |||
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"Them boobs look amazing
I'd be scared you donked me on the head with that and knocked me out "Lol  | |||
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"I'm too buggered after this afternoon's exertions. 😜" She doesnt want another buggering 🥲 | |||
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"I'm too buggered after this afternoon's exertions. 😜 She doesnt want another buggering 🥲" She wants too much buggering | |||
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"I'm too buggered after this afternoon's exertions. 😜 She doesnt want another buggering 🥲" But her butt cheeks would suffocate me to death and then some! | |||
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"I'm too buggered after this afternoon's exertions. 😜 She doesnt want another buggering 🥲" We're both straight 🤣 | |||
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"If would have to be aliens to stop me" He likes aliens to hold him | |||
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"I couldn't fuck a minion!" You're a bloke. | |||
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"I couldn't fuck a minion! You're a bloke." Spot might attack me. | |||
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"I have big plans of washing my hair tonight. " ......but you're just too hot for me | |||
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"I have big plans of washing my hair tonight. " But she has the attention span of a goldfish so would forget to leave me a verification | |||
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"I have big plans of washing my hair tonight. But she has the attention span of a goldfish so would forget to leave me a verification " I just cba | |||
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"I have big plans of washing my hair tonight. But she has the attention span of a goldfish so would forget to leave me a verification I just cba" And your were on my list of people I most certainly would have fucked tonight. I just can't catch a break 🤣 | |||
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"I've got enough of the devil in me already. " there's no room she's full of devil and he's horny | |||
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"I have big plans of washing my hair tonight. But she has the attention span of a goldfish so would forget to leave me a verification I just cba And your were on my list of people I most certainly would have fucked tonight. I just can't catch a break 🤣" Feck off 🤣 | |||
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"I have big plans of washing my hair tonight. But she has the attention span of a goldfish so would forget to leave me a verification I just cba And your were on my list of people I most certainly would have fucked tonight. I just can't catch a break 🤣 Feck off 🤣" I would fuck your butt.. If you would let me.... Oh hang on think I misread this? | |||
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"I have big plans of washing my hair tonight. But she has the attention span of a goldfish so would forget to leave me a verification I just cba And your were on my list of people I most certainly would have fucked tonight. I just can't catch a break 🤣 Feck off 🤣 I would fuck your butt.. If you would let me.... Oh hang on think I misread this? " I can't because he's in Essex and I have relatives in Essex so we could possibly be related | |||
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"I have big plans of washing my hair tonight. But she has the attention span of a goldfish so would forget to leave me a verification I just cba And your were on my list of people I most certainly would have fucked tonight. I just can't catch a break 🤣 Feck off 🤣 I would fuck your butt.. If you would let me.... Oh hang on think I misread this? I can't because he's in Essex and I have relatives in Essex so we could possibly be related "I can't because she's too far otherwise I would definitely love to | |||
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"Too busy reading horoscopes n stuff" I'm celibate | |||
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"I'm knitting a jumper for winter" He is not studding me with that weapon | |||
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"I'm knitting a jumper for winter He is not studding me with that weapon "Those flowers behind her may have bees! | |||
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"I'm knitting a jumper for winter He is not studding me with that weapon
Those flowers behind her may have bees!"He won't take that towel off | |||
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"He's too busy raving "I'm not nerdy enough. I'm more hardcore. | |||
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"It's too warm " Because they used the only excuse that wasn't allowed.. | |||
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"It's too warm Because they used the only excuse that wasn't allowed.." But I would tho! | |||
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"It's too warm Because they used the only excuse that wasn't allowed.." I'm not curious enough. | |||
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"It's too warm Because they used the only excuse that wasn't allowed.." I'd last about 5 seconds she's too hot | |||
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"It's too warm Because they used the only excuse that wasn't allowed.." Their curiosity made me curious and the neighbours cat got killed. I need to attend the funeral | |||
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"It's too warm Because they used the only excuse that wasn't allowed.. I'd last about 5 seconds she's too hot "He’s too nice! | |||
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"It's too warm Because they used the only excuse that wasn't allowed.. I'd last about 5 seconds she's too hot "Because his answer is far too clever and appropriate.... And there's only one way to find out.. | |||
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"I'm knitting a jumper for winter He is not studding me with that weapon "Bloody hell you made it sound like an intercontinental ballistic missile | |||
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"I’m throwing a party as I’m a dog man " I'm shaving my bum | |||
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"I’m throwing a party as I’m a dog man I'm shaving my bum " I prefer a hairy bum.... Lololol..not remotely true | |||
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"I’m throwing a party as I’m a dog man I'm shaving my bum " I'm dying my eyebrows | |||
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"I’m throwing a party as I’m a dog man I'm shaving my bum " 😂😂😂😂🤣🤣🤣 no words for that excuse! | |||
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" 😂😂😂😂🤣🤣🤣 no words for that excuse!" Nope, no comical excuses, I definitely would x | |||
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"Im watching my paint dry" I'm watching him watch his paint dry | |||
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"Im watching my paint dry I'm watching him watch his paint dry" Rugby fan! | |||
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"Busy watching the cricket" I don't like cricket | |||
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"Busy watching the cricket I don't like cricket " 🎶 I love it🎵 | |||
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"Busy watching the cricket I don't like cricket " Because we come from a land down under | |||
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"It looks like rain" Can't find my umbrella | |||
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"It looks like rain" I’m out of excuses. Let’s get it on ! | |||
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"Wind was blowing wrong way " My strap on is broken 🤦♀️ | |||
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"Wind was blowing wrong way My strap on is broken 🤦♀️" We would get caught on the beach | |||
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"Wind was blowing wrong way My strap on is broken 🤦♀️ We would get caught on the beach" I can't go to the beach, I'm afraid of quick sand | |||
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"A grey polo shirt makes me limp. Sorry pal" He's over 300 miles away and diesel is too expensive | |||
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"Way too many reasons including you are repulsive" Wow that’s harsh to whoever you are aiming that at. Do I need any reasons!?! | |||
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"Way too many reasons including you are repulsive Wow that’s harsh to whoever you are aiming that at. Do I need any reasons!?! " I suspect it's aimed at me. Each to their own | |||
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"Way too many reasons including you are repulsive Wow that’s harsh to whoever you are aiming that at. Do I need any reasons!?! I suspect it's aimed at me. Each to their own " Unsure if the boobies are juicy or not. Also, what kind of juice? OJ? Apple? Mango? So many options. | |||
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"Way too many reasons including you are repulsive Wow that’s harsh to whoever you are aiming that at. Do I need any reasons!?! I suspect it's aimed at me. Each to their own Unsure if the boobies are juicy or not. Also, what kind of juice? OJ? Apple? Mango? So many options." He’s too good looking! It’s annoying ! | |||
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"I can't match his Vodka intake." He's too posh for me. I'm just a commoner. | |||
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"I can't match his Vodka intake." I can’t match his style or class and general legendary -ness | |||
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"I'm washing my hair -y chest "I'm all out of sympathy | |||
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"I'm washing my hair -y chest
I'm all out of sympathy "I wouldn’t want to hurt her. | |||
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"I'm washing my hair -y chest
I'm all out of sympathy
I wouldn’t want to hurt her."The husbands cock is more than enough for me and the only cock I want | |||
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"I'm washing my hair -y chest
I'm all out of sympathy "I'm apparently out of her age range | |||
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"I'm washing my hair -y chest
I'm all out of sympathy
I wouldn’t want to hurt her.
The husbands cock is more than enough for me and the only cock I want "I can see why | |||
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"I'm washing my hair -y chest
I'm all out of sympathy
I wouldn’t want to hurt her.
The husbands cock is more than enough for me and the only cock I want "I've just emptied 2 loads over her so runni6on empty  | |||
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"I'm washing my hair -y chest
I'm all out of sympathy
I wouldn’t want to hurt her.
The husbands cock is more than enough for me and the only cock I want
I've just emptied 2 loads over her so runni6on empty "I've forgotten how to | |||
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"He’s into some kinky shit " My foof has dissolved in the heat | |||
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"I'm not bi" Cos he took my turn on the hootie frooties | |||
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"Im going to work" . Simply because your off to work but if you wasn’t lol | |||
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"I can't see your profile " Not sure the bed is big enough for the 4 of us | |||
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"I need to wash my hair " simply because your washing your hair, how long you going to be lol | |||
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"I need to wash my hair simply because your washing your hair, how long you going to be lol "I'm all out of energy | |||
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"Need take the dog the vets " scared of dogs | |||
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"Need take the dog the vets scared of dogs " Scared I mite get locked in your dungeon | |||
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"Need take the dog the vets scared of dogs Scared I mite get locked in your dungeon " dont think you could take the punishment | |||
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"Need take the dog the vets scared of dogs Scared I mite get locked in your dungeon dont think you could take the punishment " Washing my hair on 5th June so not available | |||
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"Need take the dog the vets scared of dogs Scared I mite get locked in your dungeon dont think you could take the punishment Washing my hair on 5th June so not available" I might crease your suit | |||
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"Need take the dog the vets scared of dogs Scared I mite get locked in your dungeon dont think you could take the punishment Washing my hair on 5th June so not available I might crease your suit" Have a crossword to finish | |||
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"Need take the dog the vets scared of dogs Scared I mite get locked in your dungeon dont think you could take the punishment Washing my hair on 5th June so not available I might crease your suit Have a crossword to finish" I’m thirsty might drink all your cherry cola | |||
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"Need take the dog the vets scared of dogs Scared I mite get locked in your dungeon dont think you could take the punishment Washing my hair on 5th June so not available I might crease your suit Have a crossword to finish I’m thirsty might drink all your cherry cola " the cherry colas all ours we arnt sharing | |||
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"Need take the dog the vets scared of dogs Scared I mite get locked in your dungeon dont think you could take the punishment Washing my hair on 5th June so not available I might crease your suit Have a crossword to finish I’m thirsty might drink all your cherry cola the cherry colas all ours we arnt sharing " You are a couple and probably don’t allow Mrs to play alone x and your both bloody miles away happy bank holiday Monday x | |||
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"Not keen on the shoes...🤷♂️" Wears clothes too much | |||
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".....it's beach time! " Sand will get everywhere | |||
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"I haven't brushed my teeth yet. " I wouldn’t last long enough to satisfy you | |||
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"I haven't brushed my teeth yet. I wouldn’t last long enough to satisfy you " Bloody site filters! | |||
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