FabSwingers.com forum: What's the most valuable lesson you've learnt since starting swinging ? ✨️😎🌞

By *oveToPlay. OP Couple
2 days ago

Yorkshire

Hey you lovely lot ❤️

So as the title says - what's the most valuable lesson you've learnt since starting swinging?

Can be about yourself, others, sexual, non sexual - anything ✨️

Looking forward to reading your responses

S xxx

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By *parkle1974Woman
2 days ago

Trust no-one.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
2 days ago

East Sussex

I haven't learned anything new but a lot of my previous opinions have been reinforced many times.

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
2 days ago

little house on the praire

Always look after yourself

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By *urphy44Man
2 days ago

in the middle

"Trust no-one."

This ☝🏻

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By *ittlemissFlirtyCouple
2 days ago

3rd Rock from the sun

"Trust no-one."

💯... That and take no crap

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By *rdere OpusCouple
2 days ago

Brum - ish

That it doesn’t matter if I’m bigger or smaller, there will always be people who find me attractive and I’m about more than that.

To prioritise myself and set clear boundaries.

A level of cynicism - when it comes to sex, some people will say and do anything 🙂

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By *ay-jayupMan
2 days ago

Bromsgrove

"Trust no-one."

Absolutely this

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
2 days ago

East Sussex

Never, under any circumstances take one for the team.

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By *B69Woman
2 days ago

Wiltshire

I’m not really a swinger but I would say don’t believe all that you read/hear

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By *layfullsamMan
2 days ago

Solihull

Lower my expectations, don’t give up hours of my life on here when life’s for living, enjoy the forums, a meet would be great but it is what it is

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By *ools and the brainCouple
2 days ago

couple, us we him her.

Avoid eye contact

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By *onkeyandBonesCouple
2 days ago

Staffordshire

Never take one for the team

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
2 days ago

little house on the praire

Always use your common sense and never let your heart rule your head. Keep emotions under control

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By *inkyycurvyyWoman
2 days ago

Manchester

You don't need to lower your standards, and it's okay to know what you want and not settle for less.

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By *hrisukbishareCouple
2 days ago

Edinburgh

Be honest. Avoid those who feel they are being uncaring or disrespectful of you. Don't be a dick

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
2 days ago

little house on the praire

Don't just wait fir things to come to you, if you want something go out and get it

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By *parkle1974Woman
2 days ago

People gossip

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By *andadbodMan
2 days ago

Liverpool

men can be very childish

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By *wist my nipplesCouple
2 days ago

North East Scotland, mostly

Gosh, this is pretty negative so far!

I’ve learned that it’s pretty simple. If everyone is having fun, nobody’s getting hurt, and it feels good, crack on

Mrs TMN x

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By *iFruityCoupleCouple
2 days ago

Watermouth

Never travel long distances to a first meet

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By *iFruityCoupleCouple
2 days ago

Watermouth

"Gosh, this is pretty negative so far!

I’ve learned that it’s pretty simple. If everyone is having fun, nobody’s getting hurt, and it feels good, crack on

Mrs TMN x"

That to

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By *parkle1974Woman
2 days ago

There are some decent humans out there....not all but some

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By *ell GwynnWoman
2 days ago

North Yorkshire

That the best sex happens when there's a great connection.

That some people will lie through their teeth if they think it will get them sex.

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By *avinaTVTV/TS
2 days ago

Transsexual Transylvania

You're beautiful as you are.

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By *parkle1974Woman
2 days ago

Compliments on here are like some people's tans......fake

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By *ormalfornorfolkMan
2 days ago

Norwich

That no one fancies me anymore.

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By *inister_SpinsterWoman
2 days ago

Manchester(ish).

Know your boundaries and stick to them.

That way the connections you have with the people you like, will be meaningful and worthwhile for everyone involved.

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By *eroLondonMan
2 days ago

Mayfair

I'm not a swinger, therefore not your target audience for this thread, but I'll add...those who are duplicitous on here, exhibit double standards and pay lip service...are always teaching me invaluable lessons as a consequence. 🩶

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By *ansoffateMan
2 days ago

Sagittarius A

Don't fall into the trap of believing there's some objective truth about what is or isn't swinging.

Instead just agree your boundaries with your partners.

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
2 days ago

little house on the praire

concentrate on yourself and don't worry yourself what others are up to

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By *ansoffateMan
2 days ago

Sagittarius A

"I'm not a swinger, therefore not your target audience for this thread, but I'll add...those who are duplicitous on here, exhibit double standards and pay lip service...are always teaching me invaluable lessons as a consequence. 🩶"

There's a rare ambiguity in your language there Nero. Just to be clear you aren't learning to be duplicitous? More a defence against the dark arts ethos?

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By *eroLondonMan
2 days ago

Mayfair

There's a rare ambiguity in your language there Nero. Just to be clear you aren't learning to be duplicitous? More a defence against the dark arts ethos?"

•

I think you're right, Hans, dear fellow. I've never been so opaque. But you summed it up perfectly. ☮️

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By *andTWoman
2 days ago

Altrincham

Don't settle for anything other than what you want

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By (user no longer on site)
2 days ago

I’ve learned that I know absolutely nothing…but fuck me am I enjoying the lessons 😈

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By *lyingsolo1000Woman
2 days ago

Reading

I've learned that friendships can be as important as the sex. And online friendships can be a real thing. I met a guy through another site that was originally supposed to be a one off but we connected on so many levels and he is one of my closest friends. We have helped each other through breakups, work issues, health problems and had great sex along the way.

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By *asygoingcouple1000Couple
2 days ago

manchester

Men will tell you anything for a shag

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By *eoBloomsMan
2 days ago

Springfield

That the exact same human impulses dominate in this environment as they do any other.

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By *eard and BoobsCouple
2 days ago

Portstewart

We've learned that we will always have a cuppa and chat with anyone before offering to invite them to our bed and neither or us would take one for the team there has to be sparks with everyone or it's not enjoyable in our personal opinion

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By *oxy jWoman
2 days ago

somerset

dont trust anyone trust is earnt not given... also dont believe a word said as especially online as most are just in fantasy land and not lifestyle swinging

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By *il-widgeMan
2 days ago

Stoke on Trent

Trust your gut, don't ignore the red flags despite finding them sexy or wanting to take things further. But also building friendships sharing thoughts, feelings etc. Just be honest if its thrown in your face, let it go.

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By *iss NaturalWoman
2 days ago

Manchester

I am nice person and deserve to be treated respect

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By *iss NaturalWoman
2 days ago

Manchester

That most men are not genuine

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By *iss NaturalWoman
2 days ago

Manchester

"Compliments on here are like some people's tans......fake

"
🤣😁🤣

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By *eoBloomsMan
2 days ago

Springfield

"Men will tell you anything for a shag"

Damn you're both so hot 🔥!

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By *eroLondonMan
2 days ago

Mayfair

"That most men are not genuine "

•

Behind every faux man is a disingenuous woman.

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By *ife NinjaMan
2 days ago

Dunfermline

Lots of people like Angel Delight 🤓

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By *edSirenWoman
2 days ago

magic mountain

Pussy tastes much better with a cock in them too

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By *asty tatsyMan
2 days ago

london

"Pussy tastes much better with a cock in them too"

My thoughts just ran away with me then

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By *asty tatsyMan
2 days ago

london

That the only way is a FAF for a opening message

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By *xstaceyxxTV/TS
2 days ago

longeaton,ng10

Every person chats alot but never anything comes out of it.

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By *end1Man
2 days ago

southend on sea

Don't wipe your cock in their curtains 😂

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By *exyScientistsCouple
2 days ago

Castlebar

Trust your gut, not what people tell you.

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By *azler17Man
2 days ago

Castleford

Those you do trust become good friends

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By *aomilatteCouple
2 days ago

Midlands

When people say they're going to "come and say hi" in a club, they're not really going too

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By *otwife Snowy and MeCouple
2 days ago

Carshalton

"Pussy tastes much better with a cock in them too"

I'd add that cock tastes better with pussy juice covering it xx

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By *kybluesam1987Man
2 days ago

coventry

Don’t believe anything until it’s proven

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By *igboobstCouple
2 days ago

barrow

Its 90% making friends get that right and the rest will follow

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By *uffnmuffCouple
2 days ago

London

The grass is not greener x

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By *959femxCouple
2 days ago

Weston super mare

"That it doesn’t matter if I’m bigger or smaller, there will always be people who find me attractive and I’m about more than that.

To prioritise myself and set clear boundaries.

A level of cynicism - when it comes to sex, some people will say and do anything 🙂

"
110 % 👆

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
2 days ago

little house on the praire

Always expect the unexpected

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By *eyond PurityCouple
2 days ago

Lincolnshire

"Pussy tastes much better with a cock in them too"

We don’t believe you 👀

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By *reyToTheFairiesWoman
2 days ago

Carlisle usually

Make sure you go to theirs at least once. Even if it's super inconvenient and a lot of faff compared to them coming to yours every time 💜

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By *eyond PurityCouple
2 days ago

Lincolnshire

Trust your instinct - in a world where being open and honest should be a given, it’s surprising how many aren’t.

A positive one - I’ve enjoyed C meeting someone and then telling me all about it - never dreamt that would have ever been a fantasy…

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By *atnip make me purrWoman
2 days ago

Reading

Have fun and when the fun stops, stop.

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By *959femxCouple
2 days ago

Weston super mare

A truism . But as potent today as the first day it was uttered .

A standing prick has no conscience.

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By *eenALongTime.....Man
2 days ago

Bristol

One slip of the tongue and your in the shit

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By *lan157Man
2 days ago

a village near Haywards Heath in East Sussex

A single man will have more fun going to clubs and parties with a woman friend than attempting to do so on his own.

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By *uctifanoWoman
1 day ago

Glasgow

"Never, under any circumstances take one for the team."

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By *uctifanoWoman
1 day ago

Glasgow

"One slip of the tongue and your in the shit

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By *uctifanoWoman
1 day ago

Glasgow

"Have fun and when the fun stops, stop. "

This too

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By *ynamicnatureMan
1 day ago

Doncaster

Being shy typically gets you nowhere.

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By *xoticflower72Woman
1 day ago

Yorkshire

So many selfish people out there

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By *antsGerfMan
1 day ago

Basingstoke

Be yourself, not what you think others want you to be

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By *he Silver FuxMan
1 day ago

Uttoxeter

Very few people on Fab, despite assurances that this isn’t their first, haven’t even watched a rodeo, let alone taken part in one

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By *aybeLadyWoman
1 day ago

West Dublin

Finding a connection is b!oody difficult.

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By *ablo minibar123Woman
1 day ago

Trust no one

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By *teveanddebsCouple
1 day ago

Norwich

Don't be put off by thinking someone is out of your league, go for it, worst that can happen is they aren't interested.

It won't kill you

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By *rsKOTCTWoman
1 day ago

Leeds

That I'm definitely more into the ladies than men.

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By *oveToPlay. OP Couple
1 day ago

Yorkshire

What an interesting array of answers ❤️

S xxx

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By *zBoy123Man
1 day ago

London

Excellent advice 😂

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By *onnachakeaneMan
1 day ago

Dundrum

I’ll never learn…..

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By *ealMissShadyWoman
1 day ago

St Albans/ North Welsh Borders

Respect for myself and never compromising my boundaries

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By *HUSH-Man
1 day ago

London

"Have fun and when the fun stops, stop. "

This

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By *weetiepie99Woman
1 day ago

cardiff

That the sex god/goddess verification descriptions are just like Jackanory, no one is ever going to write a bad story

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By *elaninMaverickWoman
1 day ago

near Putney Heath

Not a swinger but I met you on a swinger site and at a swinger social in person. Lol!

Come now..Are ye pulling my hindquarters?

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By *ypersoonMan
1 day ago

WHITCHURCH, Shropshire

Don't build your hopes up thinking you'll be successful in getting sexual action every time & don't overstep anyone's boundaries

both of those learned the hard way

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By *ittlemissFlirtyCouple
1 day ago

3rd Rock from the sun

Prepare for disappointment 🤣

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By *ouise 555Woman
1 day ago

Dorchester

"Trust no-one.

This ☝🏻

110% this

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By *orny PTMan
1 day ago

Peterborough

Learn that vanilla gets in the way a lot.

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By *elaninMaverickWoman
1 day ago

near Putney Heath

"Hey you lovely lot ❤️

So as the title says - what's the most valuable lesson you've learnt since starting swinging?

Can be about yourself, others, sexual, non sexual - anything ✨️

Looking forward to reading your responses

S xxx"

Consent and safety are paramount...not just in swinging but in every situation. Not just mine but others that I'm swinging with and by extension their other partners.

I'm astounded by people who take no notice of the physical safety and the psychological safety...Their own or other people's. Often the thought doesn't even come into their mind. I'm forever also asking men in clubs to ask permission before touching. UK and France.

Honestly if I don't feel safe physically and mentally, I'll be so damned tense that there's no way you are going to get a butt plug up my uptight tight ass.

Also some older cock won't going in uptight and/or dry pussy either. Yes, it goes softer with age.

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By *oe n JayCouple
1 day ago

Surrey

Safety first.

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By *ottmCouple
1 day ago

Nottingham

"I’ve learned that I know absolutely nothing…but fuck me am I enjoying the lessons 😈"

Love this…I feel the same

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By *ee-LiteWoman
1 day ago

Northampton

Establish boundaries and don’t ’people please’

‘To thyself be true’

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By *eordieJeansCouple
1 day ago

Newcastle upon Tyne

If you get something sticky on your hand in a club don’t taste it

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By *he Silver FuxMan
1 day ago

Uttoxeter

"Have fun and when the fun stops, stop.

This

This: Have fun and when the fun stops, try another hole

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By *he Silver FuxMan
1 day ago

Uttoxeter

"If you get something sticky on your hand in a club don’t taste it "

I want to hear the ‘learning opportunity’ backstory to this…

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By *ongueingroove58Man
1 day ago

Whitley bay

Trust your gut, if it's too good to be true it probably is

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By *eordieJeansCouple
1 day ago

Newcastle upon Tyne

"If you get something sticky on your hand in a club don’t taste it

I want to hear the ‘learning opportunity’ backstory to this…"

Club buffet followed by sex, something on my hand, hand in mouth, instant regret.

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By *outhern77Man
1 day ago

Birmingham

To stop laughing so much when You message a Female about Her Status at that time, by the time they eventually get to read it they've forgotton what they'd put and think You're nuttier than a pack of KP Peanuts

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By *he Silver FuxMan
1 day ago

Uttoxeter

"If you get something sticky on your hand in a club don’t taste it

I want to hear the ‘learning opportunity’ backstory to this…

Club buffet followed by sex, something on my hand, hand in mouth, instant regret."

🙇‍♂️ ‘That’s not mayonnaise…’ 🤮

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By *ools and the brainCouple
1 day ago

couple, us we him her.

"If you get something sticky on your hand in a club don’t taste it

I want to hear the ‘learning opportunity’ backstory to this…

Club buffet followed by sex, something on my hand, hand in mouth, instant regret."

We have attended a couple of clubs with buffets and avoided like the plague, I don't want to be eating food where hand's and fingers have rummaged around in it and god knows what said hand's have been doing.

Nope nope nope.

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By *irthandgirthMan
24 hours ago

Camberley occasionally doncaster

Got better at saying no and not feeling awkward or guilty. We don't owe anyone anything. (Yes I know that's relatively rare coming from a bloke)

My filtering and nutter radar has improved.

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By *inaTitzTV/TS
24 hours ago

Titz Towers, North Notts

Tgirls are amazingly popular with a lot of people who don't want other folk to know

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By *eroLondonMan
22 hours ago

Mayfair

Not a swinger but I met you on a swinger site and at a swinger social in person. Lol!

Come now..Are ye pulling my hindquarters?

•

Ummm.... I'm not a swinger. 🤷🏻

💗

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By *TinRedCouple
22 hours ago

Reading

Dick pics are an absolute turn off!

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By *iss NaturalWoman
20 hours ago

Manchester

"Dick pics are an absolute turn off!"
totally agree I like to see whole body and face 😁

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By *iss NaturalWoman
20 hours ago

Manchester

Not a swinger but I met you on a swinger site and at a swinger social in person. Lol!

Come now..Are ye pulling my hindquarters?

•

Ummm.... I'm not a swinger. 🤷🏻

💗"
me too just looking for single man fwb

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By *andyBlax_XLMan
20 hours ago

Mansfield

"Trust no-one."

Lifestyle only or even outside

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By *parkle1974Woman
20 hours ago

"Trust no-one.

Lifestyle only or even outside "

Both

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By *andyBlax_XLMan
20 hours ago

Mansfield

"If you get something sticky on your hand in a club don’t taste it

I want to hear the ‘learning opportunity’ backstory to this…

Club buffet followed by sex, something on my hand, hand in mouth, instant regret.

Nope nope nope."

This is buffets in general

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By *andyBlax_XLMan
20 hours ago

Mansfield

"I haven't learned anything new but a lot of my previous opinions have been reinforced many times. "

Negative or Positive?

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By *ora the explorerWoman
20 hours ago

Paradise, Herts

"If you get something sticky on your hand in a club don’t taste it

I want to hear the ‘learning opportunity’ backstory to this…

Club buffet followed by sex, something on my hand, hand in mouth, instant regret.

Nope nope nope.

This is buffets in general "

Definitely. Can’t stand buffets. It’s a joke in my house. Oh it’ll be a buffet mum won’t eat 🤣

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By *olden_Road_to_SamarkandMan
19 hours ago

North Wessex Downs

It's the personalities and communication, that count, rather than the looks ... pretty basic but often overlooked.

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By *iss NaturalWoman
7 hours ago

Manchester

"It's the personalities and communication, that count, rather than the looks ... pretty basic but often overlooked. "
but majority of men on here don't do this

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By *ellhungvweMan
7 hours ago

Cheltenham

Women like sex as much as men.

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By *l3sumCouple
7 hours ago

london

That so many people around us are up to it but don’t say!

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By *oneyBee200Woman
6 hours ago

Kent

Take everything I read with a pinch of salt.

Trust my gut!

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By *etsybee500Couple
6 hours ago

Reading

This site has given me massive confidence, it's taught me that all the negative things i thought about my body aren't necessarily true and that despite being a bbw I am still attractive to others and that I can enjoy sex just as much as a slimmer woman. I will forever be grateful to Fab for that - my whole perception of myself changed since joining and I've met some great men on here. This site definitely isn't all negative 😊

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By *isfits behaving badlyCouple
6 hours ago

Coventry

So many lessons. However the main thing has been more the development of a skill rather than a lesson. Totally honest and open communication and expression. To hear and be herd without filter or fear of judgment. It's a great freedom and a great way to live.

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By *oopy FroodMan
6 hours ago

3rd rock from the sun

How ugly I actually am

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By *olden_Road_to_SamarkandMan
4 hours ago

North Wessex Downs

"It's the personalities and communication, that count, rather than the looks ... pretty basic but often overlooked. but majority of men on here don't do this "

You may well be right - but their loss i guess....

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By *eroLondonMan
4 hours ago

Mayfair

"It's the personalities and communication, that count, rather than the looks ... pretty basic but often overlooked. but majority of men on here don't do this

You may well be right - but their loss i guess.... "

•

Why is it their loss?

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By *umPlaywithusCouple
3 hours ago

Worcestershire

People rarely look like thier profile pics

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By *ergus1622Man
3 hours ago

Dundee

Communication and trust

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
3 hours ago

little house on the praire

It's so good we've learnt along the way. Some never learn and continue to make the same mistakes

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By *iltsTSgirlTV/TS
3 hours ago

Chichester

Don’t believe a word of people’s profiles. View them as a rough outline

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By *ustyWoman
3 hours ago

inverclyde

Go with your instincts

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By *parkle1974Woman
36 minutes ago

"It's the personalities and communication, that count, rather than the looks ... pretty basic but often overlooked. but majority of men on here don't do this

You may well be right - but their loss i guess.... "

I never get the "their loss" bit....

How can you lose what you never had??

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By *he Filthy Gorgeous OnesCouple
29 minutes ago

Cheltenham

Never believe a man who describes himself as “straight” on his profile. He’s probably not.

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By *evoncream2017Couple
28 minutes ago

exeter

Good

Most single men are polite and complimentary with the odd pushy one

Bad

That most profiles are fake

That most female pics are taken from the internet

That so many single women seeking a bi female are male

That single male profiles with no communication at evening or weekend are ……. Married

Just be honest !!

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By *eo PublicMan
25 minutes ago

Lincoln

People are unreliable.

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By *ee-LiteWoman
24 minutes ago

Northampton

Be true to yourself and establish boundaries that only you can nudge

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By *uality By DesignMan
23 minutes ago

Cheltenham

"Never believe a man who describes himself as “straight” on his profile. He’s probably not."

I Concur.

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By *antricSeeker60Man
19 minutes ago

Durham

The most valuable lesson for me is that communication and consent is key you should never take anything for granted!

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By *eo PublicMan
15 minutes ago

Lincoln

"People are unreliable."

Actually, that's unfair, some people are unreliable.

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By *hileas Fogg 69Man
1 minute ago!

Cheltenham

A lot of men lie about their sexuality just to get into a women’s knickers.

Especially couples & single females who will only play with straight men.

Perfect example is my profile. It states that I am “straight”

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