FabSwingers.com forum: What vacuum cleaner do you currently own?

By *illy Idol OP Man
1 day ago

Midlands

And what would you rate it out of 10?

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
1 day ago

East Sussex

No idea without going to the cupboard to look.

It does the job so 10.

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By *ools and the brainCouple
1 day ago

couple, us we him her.

It's purple if that helps?

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By *onjonjon44Man
1 day ago

sheffield

Titan one from Screwfix, it was on offer. A bit loud for a domestic machine, but great load capacity.

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By *tanley FunseekerMan
1 day ago

stanley

A meile thing and a Dyson handheld

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
1 day ago

The Town by The Cross

I have a dyson V1. A dyson V7. 2 Dyson Handheld. A dyson dog . An old but amazing shark a bit too heavy to get out and a shark cordless....... and uhmmmm another shark.

Yes they do all work.

Jeeez. I didn't count them before that's excessive

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By *ensuallover1000Man
1 day ago

Somewhere In The Ether…

Ah ha! My sort of thread! 😜

Vacuum cleaners are highly fascinating devices are they not?

Indeed, I often sit and quietly contemplate the intricacy and ingenuity of their design.

….but I digress.

Anyway, I presently own a Henry - built to last and picks up just about anything 👍🏻👍🏻

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By *ensuallover1000Man
1 day ago

Somewhere In The Ether…

"Ah ha! My sort of thread! 😜

Vacuum cleaners are highly fascinating devices are they not?

Indeed, I often sit and quietly contemplate the intricacy and ingenuity of their design.

….but I digress.

Anyway, I presently own a Henry - built to last and picks up just about anything 👍🏻👍🏻

Oh and a score? Henry gets a solid 9 👍🏻👍🏻

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By *illy Idol OP Man
1 day ago

Midlands

"It's purple if that helps?

It narrows it down. Corded or cordless?

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By *ools and the brainCouple
1 day ago

couple, us we him her.

"I have a dyson V1. A dyson V7. 2 Dyson Handheld. A dyson dog . An old but amazing shark a bit too heavy to get out and a shark cordless....... and uhmmmm another shark.

Yes they do all work.

Jeeez. I didn't count them before that's excessive "

Yeah you may have a bit of an issue.

Bet your house is spotless tho

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By *innamon_flameWoman
1 day ago

london

Just bought one the other day. It's not arrived yet but is one of those skinny rechargeable types. My current one is bulky, heavy and has crappy suction. I wish I had one of those upright Hoovers from the 1970s/80s that every household had. I'd love a green one. They were stylish and iconic.

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By *ools and the brainCouple
1 day ago

couple, us we him her.

"It's purple if that helps?

It narrows it down. Corded or cordless?"

Corded and it plays the jaws theme whilst sucking.

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By *cgmcgMan
1 day ago

kingston

One that's not quite big enough for my cock sadly

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By *illy Idol OP Man
1 day ago

Midlands

"Ah ha! My sort of thread! 😜

Vacuum cleaners are highly fascinating devices are they not?

Indeed, I often sit and quietly contemplate the intricacy and ingenuity of their design.

….but I digress.

Anyway, I presently own a Henry - built to last and picks up just about anything 👍🏻👍🏻

Oh and a score? Henry gets a solid 9 👍🏻👍🏻"

I've heard rumours that Henry's aren't quite what they used to be but you can't argue with a 9

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By *4FantasyCouple
1 day ago

Spalding

Ha...used to have a Dyson but it didnt last long do I now have a Henry which is pretty much indestructible lol..

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By *elix SightedMan
1 day ago

Cloud 8

A GTech Air ram and I wouldn’t recommend it. I mean, it’s not terrible at doing its only job but it’s not great either. Suction is middlin, it leaves black marks on my skirting and doors, has a stupid short charging cable and no attachments to do corners.

When it breaks, which I expect it to do soon, I’ll definitely get another brand but I like cordless as I only have a flat.

Does anyone have a shark? I had Dyson before and that was ok.

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By *illy Idol OP Man
1 day ago

Midlands

"It's purple if that helps?

It narrows it down. Corded or cordless?

Corded and it plays the jaws theme whilst sucking."

Sounds like it could be a VAX. Thank you

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By *ong-leggedblondWoman
1 day ago

Next Door

A manual carpet sweeper.

Who's parents had one?

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By *illy Idol OP Man
1 day ago

Midlands

"I have a dyson V1. A dyson V7. 2 Dyson Handheld. A dyson dog . An old but amazing shark a bit too heavy to get out and a shark cordless....... and uhmmmm another shark.

Yes they do all work.

Jeeez. I didn't count them before that's excessive "

You must be the cleanest hoarder in Britain

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By *BWmetalcouple666Couple
1 day ago

houghton

She’s called Marie

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By *r CuddleMan
1 day ago

Oxford

I have a Henry he socks well

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By *ensuallover1000Man
1 day ago

Somewhere In The Ether…

"Ah ha! My sort of thread! 😜

Vacuum cleaners are highly fascinating devices are they not?

Indeed, I often sit and quietly contemplate the intricacy and ingenuity of their design.

….but I digress.

Anyway, I presently own a Henry - built to last and picks up just about anything 👍🏻👍🏻

Oh and a score? Henry gets a solid 9 👍🏻👍🏻

I've heard rumours that Henry's aren't quite what they used to be but you can't argue with a 9

I would absolutely concur with this; since the EU directive in 2014 that limited the power output, modern Henry’s are very sadly not what they once were.

The modern construction is also not what it used to be I must regrettably report.

However, my Henry is a pre 2014 model, complete with a fingers-up-at-the-directive power boost 😇👍🏻👍🏻

Old style engineering for the win and he’s running as good now as when I first removed him from his box 🤘🏻

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By *he Flat CapsCouple
1 day ago

Pontypool

"A manual carpet sweeper.

Who's parents had one?

The Ewbank? My grandmother had one!

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By *illy Idol OP Man
1 day ago

Midlands

"Ah ha! My sort of thread! 😜

Vacuum cleaners are highly fascinating devices are they not?

Indeed, I often sit and quietly contemplate the intricacy and ingenuity of their design.

….but I digress.

Anyway, I presently own a Henry - built to last and picks up just about anything 👍🏻👍🏻

Oh and a score? Henry gets a solid 9 👍🏻👍🏻

I've heard rumours that Henry's aren't quite what they used to be but you can't argue with a 9

I would absolutely concur with this; since the EU directive in 2014 that limited the power output, modern Henry’s are very sadly not what they once were.

The modern construction is also not what it used to be I must regrettably report.

However, my Henry is a pre 2014 model, complete with a fingers-up-at-the-directive power boost 😇👍🏻👍🏻

Old style engineering for the win and he’s running as good now as when I first removed him from his box 🤘🏻

You can't argue with that then. I'll keep my out out on eBay for pre 2014

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By *an8iMan
1 day ago

Bilston

We brought a hetty vacuum when we first moved in together 15 years ago and had all sorts since they've all broke but hetty's still going strong

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By *ellhungvweMan
1 day ago

Cheltenham

I think this thread sucks.

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By *ell GwynnWoman
1 day ago

North Yorkshire

A bulky bosch thing that has frequent disagreements with the paint on my woodwork.

I will give it a 7/10:

Suction - amazing, as it's pretty old and predates the EU 900w regulations.

Maneuverability - pffft.

Reliability - it's far outlived the shitty Halo Capsule cordless thing that a mistakenly purchased 4 years ago.

I once read that Prince collected and refurbished old vacuum cleaners. I'm not sure how true it is, but I have a nice little image of him all dressed in purple and sequins whilst tinkering in his basement.

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By *porty_and_NaughtyCouple
1 day ago

Swansea

I flipping hate our hoover. It's a Vax Air Stretch.

My issues with it:

Cable is about 75m long and it doesn't have a decent hook to put it on, so it gets hung over the top of the handle and then twists around the hoover itself.

Emptying the bin is a faff, I have got sodding stinking doing this job.

The hose isn't long enough and is rather difficult to extend from the main hoover.

The attachments are crap! Everytime I want to extend the pole you have to clip into multiple sections of pipe with a tricky clip.

And our dog gets in the way whenever we use it 🤣. Other than that it's great.

Mrs

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By *oeBeansMan
1 day ago

Derby

A vacuum Shark do-do-dododo

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By *heel markMan
1 day ago

beside the sea

I've a shark for upstairs and a Henry for downstairs. Both do the job they were intended for very well . Until the kids get their hands on them and block them or burn the motor out , as they did with the shark . Got a free replacement under warranty, shark has good customer service.

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By *illy Idol OP Man
1 day ago

Midlands

"I think this thread sucks."

You dirtbag!

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By *obilebottomMan
1 day ago

All over

Dyson that I hate as works well but too dn heavy and awkward imo. Also have a Shark that tested and really like but not using yet till some new carpets arrive

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By *punk n gushCouple
1 day ago

deal

2 sharks and a dyson

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By *HUSH-Man
1 day ago

London

Dyson.

I’d give it a solid 9.5 out of 10. Truly extraordinary suction 😉

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By *illy Idol OP Man
1 day ago

Midlands

"A bulky bosch thing that has frequent disagreements with the paint on my woodwork.

I will give it a 7/10:

Suction - amazing, as it's pretty old and predates the EU 900w regulations.

Maneuverability - pffft.

Reliability - it's far outlived the shitty Halo Capsule cordless thing that a mistakenly purchased 4 years ago.

A great review and some excellent trivia added

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By *oneyBee200Woman
1 day ago

Kent

"A vacuum Shark do-do-dododo"

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By *inister_SpinsterWoman
1 day ago

Manchester(ish).

I hate, loathe, and detest vacuum cleaners of all shapes and sizes.

Henry hoover lives under the stairs.

And the cheap purple hoover lives upstairs.

C'est tout.

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By *orthern StarsCouple
1 day ago

Durham

A shark. Id rate it about 6. It easily gets blocked. I think it's down to user error though. All my hoovers don't seem to like it when I suck up a sock for some bizarre reason.

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By *IXEN200Woman
1 day ago

newcastle upon tyne

I have a Henry, or Johnny cash as he's nickname is, it's a 10 for me

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By *avexxMan
1 day ago

cheshire

a lady comes round do all my hoovering..

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By *ustful_LionessWoman
1 day ago

Heaven-sent

A Vax air upright pet max

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By *eacresteMan
24 hours ago

hart village - Hartlepool

Recently got a bush upright.

It's great and picks up a treat and has a light to illuminate the floor.

Only possible issue I can see is it will eventually snap the drive belt for the rollers and will have to replace that and the filter on the future .

emptying it involves catches and fiddly bits that may go wrong/break in the future.

But looks good quality.

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By *ablo minibar123Woman
24 hours ago

A shark cordless which is beyond useless so -10, and a shark plug in which I'm quite fond of so 8out of 10

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By *porty_and_NaughtyCouple
24 hours ago

Swansea

"A manual carpet sweeper.

Who's parents had one?

The Ewbank? My grandmother had one! "

We called ours Chris 😅

Mrs

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By *parkle1974Woman
24 hours ago

Leeds

Dyson animal 10/10

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By *ustincamebridgeCouple
24 hours ago

manchester

We have a Die son hand job and a Henry double sucker

One sucks, the other is for show

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By *ushrangerMan
24 hours ago

Basingstoke

Limited edition shark. Highly recommend

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By *xfordjohnMan
24 hours ago

Oxford

Mine's a Miele - heavy to carry upstairs but very efficient so 9/10

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By *punk n gushCouple
24 hours ago

deal

I should have said the hubby has 2 sharks and a dyson hoover I'm not allowed to touch the hoovers as I manged to blow 4 up in year

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By *elix SightedMan
24 hours ago

Cloud 8

"I should have said the hubby has 2 sharks and a dyson hoover I'm not allowed to touch the hoovers as I manged to blow 4 up in year "

That must be one hell of a rug.

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By *inister_SpinsterWoman
23 hours ago

Manchester(ish).

"I should have said the hubby has 2 sharks and a dyson hoover I'm not allowed to touch the hoovers as I manged to blow 4 up in year "

I like your style. 👍

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By *eesside AnubisMan
23 hours ago

North East

Blaupunkt cordless id give it 10

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By *inky_couple2020Couple
23 hours ago

North West

"And what would you rate it out of 10?"

Vax Pet one.

9/10. Very sucky

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By *ad NannaWoman
23 hours ago

East London

A Bosch. I picked a small one as the old Henry was too heavy for me. I've only got carpet on my stairs but I vacuum the wooden floors and lino after sweeping, and before mopping.

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By *ad NannaWoman
23 hours ago

East London

"A Bosch. I picked a small one as the old Henry was too heavy for me. I've only got carpet on my stairs but I vacuum the wooden floors and lino after sweeping, and before mopping.

10/10. It does what it's supposed to do.

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By *ubesloverMan
23 hours ago

notts

Two cordless Vax, one downstairs and one up.

Also a Shark with a very long cord.

Oh, by the way I wish people would say they vacuumed the carpet and not hoovered. Lol

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By *inky_couple2020Couple
22 hours ago

North West

"Two cordless Vax, one downstairs and one up.

Also a Shark with a very long cord.

Oh, by the way I wish people would say they vacuumed the carpet and not hoovered. Lol"

Mine is Vaxxed. It's very healthy indeed.

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By *ratty_DamselWoman
22 hours ago

London.

Meile- it's brilliant.

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By *nya NeesWoman
22 hours ago

Brum

Shark

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
22 hours ago

Central

A really old Dyson that's been reliable. ,,,8

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
22 hours ago

The Town by The Cross

"I have a dyson V1. A dyson V7. 2 Dyson Handheld. A dyson dog . An old but amazing shark a bit too heavy to get out and a shark cordless....... and uhmmmm another shark.

Yes they do all work.

Jeeez. I didn't count them before that's excessive

Yeah you may have a bit of an issue.

Bet your house is spotless tho

I do have an issue but it's not what you think

I have one in almost every room and can hoover in the blink of an eye.... no transporting from room to room .... s great

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By *inglenottsMan
22 hours ago

derby

"Ah ha! My sort of thread! 😜

Vacuum cleaners are highly fascinating devices are they not?

Indeed, I often sit and quietly contemplate the intricacy and ingenuity of their design.

….but I digress.

Anyway, I presently own a Henry - built to last and picks up just about anything 👍🏻👍🏻

Oh and a score? Henry gets a solid 9 👍🏻👍🏻

I've heard rumours that Henry's aren't quite what they used to be but you can't argue with a 9

Interesting you bring this up. I worked with someone who worked for shark, and he said modern vaccuums aren’t as powerful as older vaccuums in terms of energy due to EU directives that limited how much power they could use

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By *gent CoulsonMan
22 hours ago

Secret hideaway in the pennines

A Henry, had one for years

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By *mmaleiaWoman
22 hours ago

Trowbridge

I’ve had the same Henry for 25 years

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By *appyg123Man
22 hours ago

Crewe

I used to have a Dyson V8 but I’ve just bought a V15… big upgrade. 9.5/10

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By *lex CoxMan
22 hours ago

Porth

Just bought one from the factory shop It just doesn't suck so good as the Dyson

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By *ripfillMan
22 hours ago

Paris, New York, Hong Kong and Havant

Downstairs a shark cordless and a Henry that tips over … either d*unk or his gyro is not working correctly

Upstairs is an uptight vax “uptight” is correct it’s noisy, high Pitched and always seems angry plus his handle has been repaired several times,

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By *ystyllioMan
22 hours ago

Wrexham

I sold mine. It was just collecting dust

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By *lex CoxMan
22 hours ago

Porth

"I sold mine. It was just collecting dust "
?

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By *lue collar bi guyMan
22 hours ago

the shire

Wee hendry for me. 10/10

Bugger is indestructible. Fell down the stairs more times than a d*unken self.

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By *iss.BellaWoman
22 hours ago

Chester

[Removed by poster at 29/01/25 23:53:11]

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By *iss.BellaWoman
22 hours ago

Chester

"A shark. Don't know which model but I'd say one of the first models if I had to take a guess.

9/10 would be 10 but I forget that it needs to be charged 🤦‍♀️"

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By *eroLondonMan
20 hours ago

Mayfair

"I flipping hate our hoover. It's a Vax Air Stretch.

Mrs"

I love it when Mrs Sporty_and_Naughty says "stretch", the saucy minx. 😈

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By *arakiss12TV/TS
20 hours ago

Bedford

A Hoover upright that sounds like a heavy metal band, loud.

Lost the attachments, couldn't find anything on the Internet that fits so went BnQ plumbing department and rigged up an a adapter extension to reach the cobwebs and corners.

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By *ove2pleaseseukMan
18 hours ago

Hastings

"A GTech Air ram and I wouldn’t recommend it. I mean, it’s not terrible at doing its only job but it’s not great either. Suction is middlin, it leaves black marks on my skirting and doors, has a stupid short charging cable and no attachments to do corners.

When it breaks, which I expect it to do soon, I’ll definitely get another brand but I like cordless as I only have a flat.

Does anyone have a shark? I had Dyson before and that was ok."

Yes have a shark

Shark Anti Hair Wrap Cordless Upright Pet Vacuum [Single Battery] ICZ300UKT

£ 429.99

It dose what it needs 2, and we do have 2 dogs. but like all modern vacuum cleaners it's high maintenance as in you need remove and wash the filter once a month or it loses suction, on the plus you don't need bags for it but I did but a spare filter. The battery is removed for charging. And the moter bit detaches to make it do stairs, high level and go under the beds.

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By *viatrixWoman
18 hours ago

Redhill

Lol.

A Henry. Our cleaner bullied us into buying one. She said she wasn’t hoovering with that Dyson or Shark shit we had 😂😂😂😂

Never used it… I don’t do hoovering. The sound overwhelms me. Cleaner and hubby like it.

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By *ove2pleaseseukMan
18 hours ago

Hastings

"Lol.

A Henry. Our cleaner bullied us into buying one. She said she wasn’t hoovering with that Dyson or Shark shit we had 😂😂😂😂

Never used it… I don’t do hoovering. The sound overwhelms me. Cleaner and hubby like it. "

So long as the floor is clean for the christian louboutin's ha

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By *elshie_69Man
17 hours ago

Mean streets of Heathrow

Dyson, had it for free off the main man himself when I worked for him on his private estate in South Gloucester. One HUGE room in his house is FULL of every new prototype he has brought out on every model..it’s quite the sight

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By *ythenMan
17 hours ago

North Co. Dublin

Shark

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By *ythenMan
17 hours ago

North Co. Dublin

"Lol.

A Henry. Our cleaner bullied us into buying one. She said she wasn’t hoovering with that Dyson or Shark shit we had 😂😂😂😂

Never used it… I don’t do hoovering. The sound overwhelms me. Cleaner and hubby like it. "

Great taste in shoes

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By *atinaChica54Woman
17 hours ago

Marlborough

"Titan one from Screwfix, it was on offer. A bit loud for a domestic machine, but great load capacity."

This ⬆️ one.

Best one I've ever had tbh....

All the others I've had previously packed up way too soon due to the amount of dog hair I used to have vacuum regularly.

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By *ntelligent Gent.Man
16 hours ago

Solihull

Always Henry

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By *vaRose43Woman
16 hours ago

Forest of Dean

Downstairs - Henry the 3rd (his previous incarnations have died from overwork and old age). I do love my Henry he’s a workhorse and as a bird keeper he’s perfect.

Upstairs - James (well if Henry gets a name so does the other one), he’s a second hand Dyson and just about does the job. I’m actively searching for a young fit replacement so James can be retired.

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By *ornucopiaMan
16 hours ago

Bexley

"It's purple if that helps?

Glistening purple?

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By *riar BelisseWoman
15 hours ago

Delightful Bliss

Vax air pet, it gets all the dust from pets out of the carpet

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By *ife NinjaMan
15 hours ago

Dunfermline

Shark

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By *innamon_flameWoman
14 hours ago

london

^ now that username should be a vacuum brand

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By *ir SupremacyMan
14 hours ago

Bolton

I have got a Hetty .

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By *teveanddebsCouple
14 hours ago

Norwich

"I have got a Hetty ."

Ditto

9/10

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By *rX2024123Man
14 hours ago

Rotherfield

I have a townhouse, I keep a Shark on the top two floors & have a Dyson V8 in the kitchen as I use it so often with my dog. Both are excellent.

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By *lan157Man
14 hours ago

a village near Haywards Heath in East Sussex

Like many people I dislike the high pitched whine of most vacuum cleaners so avoid as long as possible or have a house cleaner use it.

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By *8warrenMan
14 hours ago

I have a shark lift away, anti hair wrap upright Model NZ78OURT, it’s an amazing Hoover , I’d never go back to any other make now , it’s the business 👌

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By *antam AvershiresMan
14 hours ago

Falme

I had the green Henry for pet hair and it is a solid 10/10 machine. The fact the parent company Numatic International make about 90% of the hoovers used on building sites I think is testament to their build quality.

Unfortunately it now resides in Italy so I have some Dyson I pick off the street and it does my flat beautifully

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By *illy Idol OP Man
13 hours ago

Midlands

Keep those reviews coming, it's a very interesting read❤️

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By *heekyFlirtyCoupleCouple
13 hours ago

Stockport

When it breaks, which I expect it to do soon, I’ll definitely get another brand but I like cordless as I only have a flat.

Does anyone have a shark? I had Dyson before and that was ok."

Yep , we gave a shark , great suction ! Lightweight , we would definitely rate it

Only thing and it's not a drawback as it has a digital display , no charging light ? That goes red to green , but you just turn it on to get an idea of charge

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By *ell GwynnWoman
13 hours ago

North Yorkshire

This morning I purchased an Elitevac for half price. Apparently, it's the dogs bollocks of cordless vacuums. I'm sure you're all riveted by this information.

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By *illy Idol OP Man
13 hours ago

Midlands

"This morning I purchased an Elitevac for half price. Apparently, it's the dogs bollocks of cordless vacuums. I'm sure you're all riveted by this information."

So you've ignored all the reviews above and gone off piste

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By *exyScientistsCouple
13 hours ago

Castlebar

We have the shark lift away. Specifically for pet hair and I can safely say I haven't had to pull all the hair off the brush since we got it. It's brilliant for that.

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By *ell GwynnWoman
13 hours ago

North Yorkshire

"This morning I purchased an Elitevac for half price. Apparently, it's the dogs bollocks of cordless vacuums. I'm sure you're all riveted by this information.

So you've ignored all the reviews above and gone off piste

I went with the advice of an Andrew Collins of a certain review website. Good old Andy 😊

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By *929Man
13 hours ago

bedlington

I have a shark I like it and can still recall how much it picked up vs old hoover at first use I felt like a scruff haha only issue is the brush clogs up with my daughters long hair (fuck knows how she’s got any left on her head the amount I’ve took off the brush over the years) but it simple fix and guess would happen with not hoovers

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By *allGuy1000Man
13 hours ago

Reading

Henry. Old Skool 👌🏻

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By *ensualtongue2023Man
13 hours ago

furnace

I have a very old nilfisk commercial model that is still working like new and had it about 30 years

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By *arker secrets 321Man
13 hours ago

West Bromwich

Henry x

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By *eyond PurityCouple
12 hours ago

Lincolnshire

Henry and Vorwerk

Marks out of 10 for what - domestic chores, or sucking?

Both great, and no, you're not borrowing them!

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By *ora the explorerWoman
12 hours ago

Paradise, Herts

I’ve tried a few of these new Dyson types but always gone back to Henry. You can’t beat a Henry

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By *eroLondonMan
12 hours ago

Mayfair

I have a Dyson™ V11 Cordless Vacuum Cleaner, Nickel/Blue. For once this overpriced contraption does indeed do it's job. I'm impressed.

I suggest that we all attend a vacuum cleaner symposium - Fab Vac 2025 - make a day of it, do a show and tell, drink gin, suck and go...

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By *eroLondonMan
12 hours ago

Mayfair

"I’ve tried a few of these new Dyson types but always gone back to Henry. You can’t beat a Henry "

To be honest most care homes these days are issued with a Henry, in utilitarian Red. 🟥

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By *urnedoutniceagainMan
11 hours ago

louth

After years of having various dysons and being really unimpressed with them as they spent more time dismantled to be cleaned/unblocked we got a Henry and it’s brilliant!

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By *uriousscouserWoman
11 hours ago

Wirral

It's a bissell, but I've no idea what model.

It was cheap and seems to be immortal (pretty sure I bought it in 2008 and it's still going strong - I've replaced the filter twice but otherwise all good).

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By *rumpyandsexyCouple
10 hours ago

mansfield

3 dysons was 4 but X took one

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By *2000ManMan
10 hours ago

Worthing

Henry. Simple and classic. Does the job 10/10.

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