FabSwingers.com mobile

Join us FREE, we're FREE to use

Web's largest swingers site since 2006.

Already registered?
Login here

Back to forum list
Back to The Lounge

Worth

Jump to newest
 

By *agnar73 OP   Man
4 weeks ago

glasgow-ish

How do you know your worth?

What’s the trigger that makes you think that sort of way?

Is it from within or someone else’s actions/words?

I’ll admit to going the with flow and being a bit vague about the concept.

I’m not perceiving myself as gods gift to women, but neither am I without any redeeming features.

So, usually I’m thinking some chat and a bit of connection but without any particular attitude or bullshit.

How do you see it?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ickyKlungespeareMan
4 weeks ago

St Leonards

I know my value. It's high.

It's entirely from within*, via meditation and having lived in a million quid swish London pad and sustained homelessness - so a wide range of life experience.

It's never linked into others' opinions - I can see too easily into our self-deceits and fears.

It's also entirely unlinked to romance, passion, sex, or love.

I know others' value too. It's also high.

I'm pretty sure 98%+ of people don't know it about themselves though, and mess up appreciating their own value via their deceits and fears.

Ending up fluctuating wildly between building themselves up, building others up, then putting themselves down, and putting others down.

*within/without is probably something of a false categorisation, but that's a bigger topic.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *rHotNottsMan
4 weeks ago

Dubai & Nottingham

I agree all people are high value - even the ones I don’t like, to somebody they are perfect in every way.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *sWyldWoman
4 weeks ago

Edinburgh

Oh god, this is too big a topic for 6.30am really but I'll give it a go.

In some aspects of my life, I feel I definitely know my worth. Work for example. I know what I can bring to the table, what I can do and I'm driven, motivated, passionate and people also see that. I guess I'm confident in that area.

When it comes to relationships, it's harder. I know I do have a lot to offer someone, however over the years I've actually valued myself pretty poorly and accepted so little. As a result I've then been left thinking well it must be me. I'm not good enough.

My own self esteem isn't great and I sometimes question who would want me?

I guess the fact that everyone I've ever fallen in love with hasn't actually loved me back, makes me think I'm the problem. What's wrong with me?

However, I can't spend my life analysing that, so now I'm trying really hard to see my worth. To actually make sure I don't settle for less than I want and to almost love myself enough so my sense of worth doesn't ever come from other people again.

It's not easy to break the habits of a lifetime but I'm trying my best.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *unxxx9911Man
4 weeks ago

Redhill


"Oh god, this is too big a topic for 6.30am really but I'll give it a go.

In some aspects of my life, I feel I definitely know my worth. Work for example. I know what I can bring to the table, what I can do and I'm driven, motivated, passionate and people also see that. I guess I'm confident in that area.

When it comes to relationships, it's harder. I know I do have a lot to offer someone, however over the years I've actually valued myself pretty poorly and accepted so little. As a result I've then been left thinking well it must be me. I'm not good enough.

My own self esteem isn't great and I sometimes question who would want me?

I guess the fact that everyone I've ever fallen in love with hasn't actually loved me back, makes me think I'm the problem. What's wrong with me?

However, I can't spend my life analysing that, so now I'm trying really hard to see my worth. To actually make sure I don't settle for less than I want and to almost love myself enough so my sense of worth doesn't ever come from other people again.

It's not easy to break the habits of a lifetime but I'm trying my best. "

Deep for 6.30!!!!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *iker JackMan
4 weeks ago

Wolverhampton

It is weird for me

At work I totally know my worth. However that has allowed a certain amount of work creep in to areas that are not really my responsibility and I have to own that as mine. I need to learn to say no

As a person and on here I am crap at knowing my worth. I have allowed things (non physical things) but situations to arise that have made me question it and that has in some ways been a huge negative for me

I recently took a week out. Not long really. But a week to re asses my worth, some may say that’s selfish, maybe it is, but I cannot allow a repetition to happen again

So now I am probably more aloof. More strong in my words. But I need to look after myself

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *aven.Woman
4 weeks ago

Not the North West...

At work, I know I'm good at whatever I do, I always have been.

My worth when it comes to relationships/men/sex....meh. I know I'm not the prettiest/sexiest/funnest person to be around, I could never fully be myself with anyone, I will never be memorable or be the 'one'. And I'm ok with that, but in terms of my worth I guess it's not much. But I know it so, yes, I know my worth.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *lowupdollTV/TS
4 weeks ago

Herts

If I got buried alive I’m the only one digging me out. That’s all I need to know about self value.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ellhungvweMan
4 weeks ago

Cheltenham

I value myself.

I don’t put much/any value on external validation or criticism. That’s not to say I don’t listen to ideas/views I think are important but I don’t let them warp my thinking. As a result I am comfortable in my own judgment and can live with myself.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *reyToTheFairiesWoman
4 weeks ago

Carlisle usually

I value myself.

For me it means not tolerating mediocrity. This doesn't mean the people that don't excite me are worth less than me in some way. Just a matter of incompatibility 💜

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ansoffateMan
4 weeks ago

Sagittarius A

Sometimes I spiral out on a tangent that brings me back to the realisation that I am.

I think that's just part of this temporal configuration of stardust, on a peculiar rock, just the right distance from a hot ball of gas, also spiralling out amidst a sea of celestial bodies.

And then I find myself wondering am I?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
4 weeks ago

East Sussex

I don't know.

I know it has to come from within because people can't wait to tear you down

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *agnar73 OP   Man
4 weeks ago

glasgow-ish


"Oh god, this is too big a topic for 6.30am really but I'll give it a go.

In some aspects of my life, I feel I definitely know my worth. Work for example. I know what I can bring to the table, what I can do and I'm driven, motivated, passionate and people also see that. I guess I'm confident in that area.

When it comes to relationships, it's harder. I know I do have a lot to offer someone, however over the years I've actually valued myself pretty poorly and accepted so little. As a result I've then been left thinking well it must be me. I'm not good enough.

My own self esteem isn't great and I sometimes question who would want me?

I guess the fact that everyone I've ever fallen in love with hasn't actually loved me back, makes me think I'm the problem. What's wrong with me?

However, I can't spend my life analysing that, so now I'm trying really hard to see my worth. To actually make sure I don't settle for less than I want and to almost love myself enough so my sense of worth doesn't ever come from other people again.

It's not easy to break the habits of a lifetime but I'm trying my best. "

Thanks _swyld - youre better than me at expressing it

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *929Man
4 weeks ago

newcastle

I consider my worth decent for everything except finding a decent partner, when I was first single again after 15 years in relationship everyone said “oh you will be fine, you got head screwed on, in great shape, have own business, own house ect you will easily find someone” (this is not me saying these things automatically make you more desirable I strongly disagree with that it’s just what everyone said) and it just doesn't work like that I often feel Ill be on own rest of life (and I’m mostly fine with that)

I’ve watched a few friends have relationships that end and just walk into another, a mate who became single ages after I did is already married it just don’t work like that for everyone

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ealMissShadyWoman
4 weeks ago

St Albans/ Welsh Borders

Yes I do know my worth, I stay true to me and I don't put up with shit from anyone....Too old and too grumpy for that

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *r John WickMan
4 weeks ago

The Continental

I don’t even know what it means.

I tend to avoid most people so I imagine it doesn’t really apply to me if I did know what it meant.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
4 weeks ago

I am a stupid moth.. I've burnt my wings so many times I'm almost back to caterpillar stage

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *parkle1974Woman
4 weeks ago

Leeds

I know my worth, if others can't see it, that's a them issue.

I will no longer tolerate bullshit or being disrespected and being treated like an afterthought x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ildTimes777Man
4 weeks ago

Colchester/London


"I know my worth, if others can't see it, that's a them issue.

I will no longer tolerate bullshit or being disrespected and being treated like an afterthought x"

You go Girl!!!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *aven.Woman
4 weeks ago

Not the North West...


"I know my worth, if others can't see it, that's a them issue.

I will no longer tolerate bullshit or being disrespected and being treated like an afterthought x

You go Girl!!! "

Do you want some pom poms with that?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ora the explorerWoman
4 weeks ago

Paradise, Herts

To be honest it’s not something I think about. I’ve never thought well im worth more than that or I’m not worth that. It’s similar with a lot of threads i see on here. Worth/ratings/leagues etc. I just get on with life and am quite happy!

I think maybe I’m just not an overthinker. Or I just don’t think 🤣

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *eroLondonMan
4 weeks ago

Covent Garden

I am my own advocate. I have to look after myself and ensure that I have some modicum of worth.

Occasionally I find that people's inactions are sufficient enough to 'knock' my worth, somewhat.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ealitybitesMan
4 weeks ago

Belfast

I don't have a worthy trigger.

I don't see life as a competition and I certainly don't see fab life as one.

I know from experience that I make a difference in some people's lives but I don't expect anything in return.

I also know that I have zero influence in the lives of others and that is deliberate in many cases.

I am worthy of those I chose to surround myself with and beyond that is not a question I debate, discuss or even give any consideration to.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *weetiepie99Woman
4 weeks ago

cardiff

As a poster said above its a bit of an alien concept for me, I just get on with life as best I can. But I know I am a nice person, however nobody is perfect!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ear in the chairMan
4 weeks ago

yeah there

I had a life changing near death experience earlier in the year. Just after I spent some time in hospital and unlike me normally i spent some introspective thought time. Looking back as my life, what I've achieved, who's lives I've made better/easier/happier along the way and realised that although sometimes situations aren't perfect I've had a pretty damn good life so far. I'd measure my worth against that and how I feel about me way more than what that worth is to anyone else.

Some I'll be worth the earth to, others not even a footnote. But I am generally content

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
4 weeks ago

Sexual worth or value? Zero. More generally, no idea. Not a clue what people think of me.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *elix SightedMan
4 weeks ago

Cloud 8

Blimey, there’s a lot of introspection and musing going on this morning! What with this and the leagues thread…

I see worth and worthiness as separate and possessive concepts. What am I worth to me and others could differ and maybe it’s the latter that lowers our feeling of self-worth. Our worthiness to others may be limited in certain factors - let’s say we scrape by in a job because we can and, therefore, anyone else could perform as well as us; we have no family and few friends and stay inside watching tv in all our spare time. Our impact on others is limited and so our worthiness is commensurate to that impact. But our self worth should not be diminished because of that. Every single human bean on this planet should feel as worthy as anyone else. Our impact may be lower than some (I’m no Elon Musk / Brad Pitt / Greta Thunberg) but I am worth everything to me.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 
 

By *ildTimes777Man
4 weeks ago

Colchester/London


"I know my worth, if others can't see it, that's a them issue.

I will no longer tolerate bullshit or being disrespected and being treated like an afterthought x

You go Girl!!!

Do you want some pom poms with that?"

My tongue was firmly in my cheek... Won't turn down the pom poms though if they're free...

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
Post new Message to Thread
back to top