FabSwingers.com forum: Gone off sex

By *ordlad OP Man
48 weeks ago

wrexham

My mate has asked what to do as his wife is no longer interested in sex like she used to ..he loves her bit says it's really affecting their relationship. Apparently she told him she loves him but doesn't find the urge for sex like she used to ..I.jokingly said get someone else but I don't think it went down to well ..what would you guys say or do ????

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *avinaTVTV/TS
48 weeks ago

Transsexual Transylvania

"My mate has asked what to do as his wife is no longer interested in sex like she used to ..he loves her bit says it's really affecting their relationship. Apparently she told him she loves him but doesn't find the urge for sex like she used to ..I.jokingly said get someone else but I don't think it went down to well ..what would you guys say or do ????"

Stay out of it. Or, if you really must suggest something, suggest couples counselling. Don't suggest he fuck up his marriage.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *a LunaWoman
48 weeks ago

o o OO o o

I’d tell him to get a new friend

But in all seriousness, I’d tell him to chat with his wife about it. Is she going through the menopause? Does she not fancy him anymore? Etc.

Only a good chat will get the answers he needs.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ophieslutTV/TS
48 weeks ago

Central

Keep the communication going. Have intimate touching that's nonsexual, so that physical closeness is continued and developed. Take the strain off her, so that she's less burdened.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *hipdaleCouple
48 weeks ago

Greenhithe

What age is she ? Is she pre menopause? Get a joint appointment and seek some help , my wife went off it whilst pre menopause and going through the menopause before she was a twice a day every day girl , we are now getting back to thoes days

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *asterMeliodasMan
48 weeks ago

Newmill

There's no one-size-fits-all answer to this, as it depends entirely on the people involved.

If they love each other and want to stay together, then swinging could well be a way for them both to get what they want while maintaining the relationship, but if it didn't go down well with the person who wants the sex, maybe he's not ready for that.

There's a possibility this a temporary health/stress-related situation, in which case seeing a doctor or therapist might help, but his wife would have to want to do those things, and if she has no issue with her lowered libido and doesn't think it's anything to be concerned about, there's nothing to pursue there.

If he won't entertain the notion of an extramarital partner, and she doesn't see any problem that needs fixed, and their relationship can't carry on with the sex drive mismatch, they may have to acknowledge that there's now a fundamental incompatibility and part ways. This doesn't have to be bitter or angry; sometimes these things just happen. Nobody is to blame and nothing can be done, but staying together is hurting both of them and they aren't getting what they need from it.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ordlad OP Man
48 weeks ago

wrexham

She swears she loves him .yes she is of that age ..and no he doesn't need a new friend .he knew I joking .

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *asterMeliodasMan
48 weeks ago

Newmill

Also yeah, as others have said, what he really needs to do here is talk to her rather than you about it, to be honest.

I mean for all we know this is because she's constantly having to do all the housework and he's not contributing, so she never has any time or energy for sex. There are a multitude of potential explanations and all any of us can offer is conjecture.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *xon-ninjaMan
48 weeks ago

Banbury

I'm in the same boat. My Mrs went off it totally 5 years ago. She asked the doctor to help and got very little so has resigned herself to thinking she will never want it. I will never leave my Mrs and love her. But for my libido to be satisfied, will keep looking for a fwb

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ash0000Man
48 weeks ago

Southwest

All the chatting in the world, won’t change someone’s mind if they really have no interest anymore in it. It comes to nearly everyone in the end.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ockdownlickdownMan
48 weeks ago

barrow

I think it was bob monkhouse who said he no longer got to enjoy sex with his wife.... He was asked when he came to this conclusion and replied "last night . . . And twice again this morning"

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *eeliciouschaosWoman
48 weeks ago

London

My opinion is you should really stay out of someone’s relationship issues, and definitely not to as bunch of strangers on a swinging website about a problem you know very little about.

Unless you’re “the mate” (somehow I have a feeling you are) and that’s completely different story.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *asterMeliodasMan
48 weeks ago

Newmill

"I'm in the same boat. My Mrs went off it totally 5 years ago. She asked the doctor to help and got very little so has resigned herself to thinking she will never want it. I will never leave my Mrs and love her. But for my libido to be satisfied, will keep looking for a fwb "

Just an aside after checking your profile: you may have more success without the last sentence. Talking about how you probably need to be something you're not to attract someone is probably, in a lot of cases, becoming a self-fulfilling prophecy where the negativity is putting readers off who might otherwise have been interested. I'd put something more interesting about who you are or what you're looking for instead, as your bio is a bit light on information currently.

Does your wife know you're on here?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ordlad OP Man
48 weeks ago

wrexham

Not me honestly. I'm not getting much but I'm fat n single lol

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *izandpaulCouple
48 weeks ago

merseyside

Stay out of it.

If they want professional help, ask GP for a referral or pay for it themselves.

Best they stay off social media, its a drama queens wet dream to put their oar in.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *anilla switchWoman
48 weeks ago

Hampshire

"What age is she ? Is she pre menopause? Get a joint appointment and seek some help , my wife went off it whilst pre menopause and going through the menopause before she was a twice a day every day girl , we are now getting back to thoes days "

I was going to suggest this. Hormones play a huge part in our sex drive.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
48 weeks ago

"My mate" 🤔

Stay out of it is the best option

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ordlad OP Man
48 weeks ago

wrexham

Will do ..to many underlying circumstances I think

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *adyKarmennTVTV/TS
48 weeks ago

Dublin

Defintely say talk to her first, see why she doesnt! Things happen but try couples therapy together aswell

I had a guy a few months ago him and his partner havent shared a bed in about 7 years, they are still together for their child! He couldnt get it up but as soon as i started touching his body and kissing it, up he went and he started crying! First time someone had touched him in years!!

It broke my heart!! No person should ever be in that relationship be it man or woman

Get him to talk!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

Post new Message to Thread