FabSwingers.com forum: If your ex

By *parkle1974 OP Woman
over a year ago

Leeds

If your ex was on fire....

What would you use to put them out?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If your ex was on fire....

What would you use to put them out?

Which ex are we talking about

There is certainly one I would leave to it as it would no doubt just be another bid for attention.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Whatever was to hand/available.

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By *heGateKeeperMan
over a year ago

Stratford

The appropriate extinguisher. My fire safety mandatory training is out of date mind you

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By *uxom redCouple
over a year ago

Shrewsbury

"If your ex was on fire....

What would you use to put them out?

My ex husband nothing .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My thoughts as he is truly out of them.

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By *ollybirdWoman
over a year ago

east Cork

Can I say petrol? Technically won’t put it out but it would be so much fun

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By *rBobbMan
over a year ago

Birmingham

I would walk to the nearest phone box. Call someone who hopefully is out so I can leave them a message asking them to call the fire brigade

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A steam roller would do the job

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By *r CheeseMan
over a year ago

742 Evergreen Terrace

"If your ex was on fire....

What would you use to put them out?

She's already been on fire. She's in a urn somewhere now.

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By *elaninMaverickWoman
over a year ago

near Putney Heath

"If your ex was on fire....

What would you use to put them out?

She's already been on fire. She's in a urn somewhere now."

Cackle.

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By *TG3Man
over a year ago

Swanage

"If your ex was on fire....

What would you use to put them out?

"
Water shes lovely and a blanket

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By *eeLikesLotsMan
over a year ago

Atherton

"Can I say petrol? Technically won’t put it out but it would be so much fun

To be fair, the fire would go out eventually, and probably a lot sooner!

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By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple
over a year ago

Leeds

I wouldn’t, I’d just laugh and carry on walking.

Laters Krueger.

The mr

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By *elaninMaverickWoman
over a year ago

near Putney Heath

"If your ex was on fire....

What would you use to put them out?

some exes yes

the former husband.... I wanna say no but then I know my dumb moral conscience will kick in.....

Me: Jesus! Help!

Jesus: It's fate. It has to happen.

Satan: will you both shut up and let me do my job with the eternal fires of hell.

God: if the three of you don't quit it! Everyone will be in trouble!!

Omg a religious swinger.

Always a maverick.

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By *TG3Man
over a year ago

Swanage

"If your ex was on fire....

What would you use to put them out?

some exes yes

the former husband.... I wanna say no but then I know my dumb moral conscience will kick in.....

Me: Jesus! Help!

Jesus: It's fate. It has to happen.

Satan: will you both shut up and let me do my job with the eternal fires of hell.

God: if the three of you don't quit it! Everyone will be in trouble!!

Omg a religious swinger.

Always a maverick.

"
you talking to your inner self?

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By *nitterWoman
over a year ago

the land of tall tales and yarn

"If your ex was on fire....

What would you use to put them out?

some exes yes

the former husband.... I wanna say no but then I know my dumb moral conscience will kick in.....

Me: Jesus! Help!

Jesus: It's fate. It has to happen.

Satan: will you both shut up and let me do my job with the eternal fires of hell.

God: if the three of you don't quit it! Everyone will be in trouble!!

Omg a religious swinger.

Always a maverick.

Just thank you that has made my day

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By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple
over a year ago

Leeds

Probably water.

Mrs

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By *till gameMan
over a year ago

Oldham

I’d sprint indoors, grab a few burgers and sausages, be a shame to waste and not have a bbq

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Water.

No matter how displeasing the person, I couldn’t watch them burning to death.

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By *elloWoman
over a year ago

alpha centauri

"If your ex was on fire....

What would you use to put them out?

If it's my ex (who is also on this site, not sure if he pops into the forums) why would I put him out, it probably took awhile for me to get it started in the first place

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By *coobyABCMan
over a year ago

Aberdeen

Is it too kinky to pee on them

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If your ex was on fire....

What would you use to put them out?

I don't carry those sort of grudges in life. Hate only makes you angry and look a dick.

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By *mmaleiaWoman
over a year ago

Trowbridge

All my exs are ok except 1, that 1 i’d crack out the marshmallows

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By *ivemealadybonerWoman
over a year ago

somewhere

I'll try and take a pee on him, it's 50/50 if I get performance anxiety or I have much in the tank

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By *olly_chromaticTV/TS
over a year ago

Bradford and Stockport

I still deeply love all my exes, all the way back to my first kiss with the girl over the road at age 5. I guess that I'm just a romantic and I've been lucky enough that loves might have come and gone, but have never ended with either of us being a cunt to the other.

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By *lowupdollTV/TS
over a year ago

Herts/Beds/Leeds/London

I wouldn’t be cruel.

They’re saving on heating bills, let em burn.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No problem with any previous ex, even the one who stalked me for a time.

However, former bosses, now that is a different matter.

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By *reyToTheFairiesWoman
over a year ago

Carlisle usually

There's one I wouldn't. Walking away is the only available option for that dickhead.

The rest I'd make a genuine attempt with the most viable extinguishing materials available

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By *ansoffateMan
over a year ago

Sagittarius A

I'd rather drink turpentine and piss on a brush fire.

No I'd assist of course, water wet blanket, fire blanket that kind of thing.

There may be a short contemplative pause, but nothing that would lead to lasting damage.

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By *atnip make me purrWoman
over a year ago

Reading

Of course. I'm not a monster.

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By *elaninMaverickWoman
over a year ago

near Putney Heath

"If your ex was on fire....

What would you use to put them out?

some exes yes

the former husband.... I wanna say no but then I know my dumb moral conscience will kick in.....

Me: Jesus! Help!

Jesus: It's fate. It has to happen.

Satan: will you both shut up and let me do my job with the eternal fires of hell.

God: if the three of you don't quit it! Everyone will be in trouble!!

Omg a religious swinger.

Always a maverick.

you talking to your inner self?

Always. I've got two inner child toddlers in my brain. a BPD one and an autistic one. Just which one is the demon and which one is the angel.

The conscience thing is separate though.

Complex brain. Filled with lots of useless stuff. Lol!

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By *TG3Man
over a year ago

Swanage

"If your ex was on fire....

What would you use to put them out?

some exes yes

the former husband.... I wanna say no but then I know my dumb moral conscience will kick in.....

Me: Jesus! Help!

Jesus: It's fate. It has to happen.

Satan: will you both shut up and let me do my job with the eternal fires of hell.

God: if the three of you don't quit it! Everyone will be in trouble!!

Omg a religious swinger.

Always a maverick.

you talking to your inner self?

Always. I've got two inner child toddlers in my brain. a BPD one and an autistic one. Just which one is the demon and which one is the angel.

The conscience thing is separate though.

Complex brain. Filled with lots of useless stuff. Lol!"
Well talk to me instead I'm a psychiatrist

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By *ags73Man
over a year ago

glasgow-ish

"If your ex was on fire....

What would you use to put them out?

There’s one that the ‘wouldn’t piss on’ phrase is spot on.

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By *elaninMaverickWoman
over a year ago

near Putney Heath

"If your ex was on fire....

What would you use to put them out?

I don't carry those sort of grudges in life. Hate only makes you angry and look a dick."

In my world, self-protection equals looking like a dick.

You can forgive someone but that doesn't mean you have the responsibility of saving them from themselves....especially if you know they will set you on fire too...because they are that twisted.

Nah let the professionals and the authorities handle them. I don't have capacity to help someone who intentionally sets themselves on fire.

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By *icentiousCouple
over a year ago

Up on them there hills

Nothing, dragons like fire.

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By *ot to giggleWoman
over a year ago

Coventry

Would I!

Well he already burns in hell, might see if i can find a fire extinguisher!

Wouldn't have it on my conscious that i hadn't tried.

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By *estman for the jobMan
over a year ago

Lincolnshire

My foot with the words u should never play with fire bitch ,only kidding

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By *elaninMaverickWoman
over a year ago

near Putney Heath

"If your ex was on fire....

What would you use to put them out?

some exes yes

the former husband.... I wanna say no but then I know my dumb moral conscience will kick in.....

Me: Jesus! Help!

Jesus: It's fate. It has to happen.

Satan: will you both shut up and let me do my job with the eternal fires of hell.

God: if the three of you don't quit it! Everyone will be in trouble!!

Omg a religious swinger.

Always a maverick.

you talking to your inner self?

Always. I've got two inner child toddlers in my brain. a BPD one and an autistic one. Just which one is the demon and which one is the angel.

The conscience thing is separate though.

Complex brain. Filled with lots of useless stuff. Lol!Well talk to me instead I'm a psychiatrist

Yeah we don't like psychiatrists. Lol! Sorry.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If your ex was on fire....

What would you use to put them out?

If it's my ex (who is also on this site, not sure if he pops into the forums) why would I put him out, it probably took awhile for me to get it started in the first place

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Probably just start roasting marshmallows

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By *elaninMaverickWoman
over a year ago

near Putney Heath

"Is it too kinky to pee on them"

Just don't get your willy burnt in the process....Metaphorically and realistically. Lol!

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By *TG3Man
over a year ago

Swanage

"If your ex was on fire....

What would you use to put them out?

some exes yes

the former husband.... I wanna say no but then I know my dumb moral conscience will kick in.....

Me: Jesus! Help!

Jesus: It's fate. It has to happen.

Satan: will you both shut up and let me do my job with the eternal fires of hell.

God: if the three of you don't quit it! Everyone will be in trouble!!

Omg a religious swinger.

Always a maverick.

you talking to your inner self?

Always. I've got two inner child toddlers in my brain. a BPD one and an autistic one. Just which one is the demon and which one is the angel.

The conscience thing is separate though.

Complex brain. Filled with lots of useless stuff. Lol!Well talk to me instead I'm a psychiatrist

Yeah we don't like psychiatrists. Lol! Sorry.

"
lie on my bed and let me get to the bottom of this

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By *avexxMan
over a year ago

cheshire

"Probably just start roasting marshmallows

"
,, now this made me laugh

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By *ags73Man
over a year ago

glasgow-ish

"Is it too kinky to pee on them

Just don't get your willy burnt in the process....Metaphorically and realistically. Lol!"

Big question is why would you even be near them when they went flambé

I’d be happy just getting a text

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By *ornycougaWoman
over a year ago

WHEREVER I LAY MY HAT

An axe

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

That’d be a miracle cause she’s under the patio

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Is it too kinky to pee on them

Just don't get your willy burnt in the process....Metaphorically and realistically. Lol!

Big question is why would you even be near them when they went flambé

I’d be happy just getting a text "

This, only afterwards

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By *heel markMan
over a year ago

beside the sea

She was not long ago and I would swap places in a heartbeat if my boys could have there mam back .

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By *iltsTSgirlTV/TS
over a year ago

Chichester

"If your ex was on fire....

What would you use to put them out?

Nothing

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’d try but she’d probably tell me to fuck off through the pain.

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By *iltsTSgirlTV/TS
over a year ago

Chichester

"I’d try but she’d probably tell me to fuck off through the pain. "

I’d probably throw some wood on to speed up the burn

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes I would put them out past is the past we both moved on and on my side hold no ill will or grudges so why not help someone

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By *maugMan
over a year ago

Derby

Wait until they were medium rare then carve a slice.

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By *uminousMan
over a year ago

hayes

Petrol and sulphuric acid

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By *ags73Man
over a year ago

glasgow-ish

"Is it too kinky to pee on them

Just don't get your willy burnt in the process....Metaphorically and realistically. Lol!

Big question is why would you even be near them when they went flambé

I’d be happy just getting a text

This, only afterwards

Yep.

‘Oh dear, that’s a pity’

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By *oo74Man
over a year ago

dunstable

Petrol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I’d try but she’d probably tell me to fuck off through the pain.

I’d probably throw some wood on to speed up the burn

Of course, only trying to help aren’t we!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Is it too kinky to pee on them

Just don't get your willy burnt in the process....Metaphorically and realistically. Lol!

Big question is why would you even be near them when they went flambé

I’d be happy just getting a text

This, only afterwards

Yep.

‘Oh dear, that’s a pity’"

I really wish I'd have known sooner so I could help..

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By *orace99Man
over a year ago

York

"If your ex was on fire....

What would you use to put them out?

Petrol....

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By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago

East London

My coat, or whatever was near me.

Water, if I can get to it.

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By *gent CoulsonMan
over a year ago

Secret hideaway in the pennines

Nothing

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A gallon of petrol

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By *ittlebirdWoman
over a year ago

The Big Smoke

"If your ex was on fire....

What would you use to put them out?

First of all I would ask how in the hell did he dig himself out from under the patio

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A pitchfork

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By *esthetic21Man
over a year ago

Birmingham/Bristol

If anyone was on fire I'd rush to help them. Because that's how I am

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

To be honest I don't dislike anyone enough to leave them burning. I've made peace with my past

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

oh and I'd put them out with the closest thing to extinguish a fire

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By *teveanddebsCouple
over a year ago

Norwich

For one of them I'd contact the fire brigade.

How much is a second class stamp now?

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By *aughtyLisa341Woman
over a year ago

Ripley

A fucking gallon of unleaded bastard x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There’s many exes lol I’d put them all out with gasoline. Put them out of their misery haha

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Petrol

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By *orthLondonGeekyBearMan
over a year ago

N. London

Depends on how long it took me to sell tickets...

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By *B..Woman
over a year ago

Wiltshire

Nothing

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By *nnCeeWoman
over a year ago

East of Eden, West of Hell

"If your ex was on fire....

What would you use to put them out?

If it's my ex (who is also on this site, not sure if he pops into the forums) why would I put him out, it probably took awhile for me to get it started in the first place

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A fire extinguisher.

I have a friendly relationship with all of my exes.

I often wonder why so few people can do the same..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Wouldn't put him out....I would want him to be conscious as long as possible

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By *nnCeeWoman
over a year ago

East of Eden, West of Hell

I'd try and extinguish the flames of anyone who was on fire, ex or not. That would be a flipping hideous way to go.

I don't actually hate anyb of my exes.

None of them ever did me a dirty (that I'm aware of).

There are people I don't like very much, and a few whom I've held grudges against for far too long. I wish I could forget them, but they're so deeply etched, they knew exactly what they were doing at the time... perhaps one say

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By *rgasmatron1970Man
over a year ago

Bromley

Napalm

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By *reative-mindMan
over a year ago

exeter

Marshmallows

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Can I just light a cigar on the flames and do a cool guy walk off?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Diesal

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Diesal"

Or diesel even

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Diesal"

As in lager, cider and blackcurrant?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Diesal

As in lager, cider and blackcurrant?"

Vin

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Diesal

As in lager, cider and blackcurrant?

Vin"

Please don’t throw Groot at your burning ex.

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By *nnCeeWoman
over a year ago

East of Eden, West of Hell

"Diesal

As in lager, cider and blackcurrant?

Vin

Please don’t throw Groot at your burning ex."

I am Groot!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Diesal"

Their jeans are good

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If your ex was on fire....

What would you use to put them out?

Water - we're still on excellent terms.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

An extinguisher to put the fire and then some itchy powder or something to help with the healing

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Petrol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Erm... Maybe some accelerant rather than extinguish....

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By *rgasmatron1970Man
over a year ago

Bromley

"Erm... Maybe some accelerant rather than extinguish....

Napalm works best

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By *issilia AmoriWoman
over a year ago

St Albans/ North Welsh Borders

Petrol

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By *esthetic21Man
over a year ago

Birmingham/Bristol

"Diesal

As in lager, cider and blackcurrant?"
you mean snakebite

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By *ucka39Man
over a year ago

Newcastle

I'd try some music I doubt anyone has ever tried

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By *ags73Man
over a year ago

glasgow-ish

"Is it too kinky to pee on them

Just don't get your willy burnt in the process....Metaphorically and realistically. Lol!

Big question is why would you even be near them when they went flambé

I’d be happy just getting a text

This, only afterwards

Yep.

‘Oh dear, that’s a pity’

I really wish I'd have known sooner so I could help..

Classier approach than saying petrol/diesel imo.

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By *4bimMan
over a year ago

Farnborough Hampshire

Walking away and silence hurts them more

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By *heblowyouknow24Woman
over a year ago

norwich

Nothing

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By *ivpoolmanMan
over a year ago

Liverpool

"Nothing

Confetti lol

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By *onjudgesCouple (MM)
over a year ago

Carlisle

Too soggy to burn.

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By *avey daveMan
over a year ago

Castleton

A ton of cement

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By *hippy57Man
over a year ago

Chelmsford

Petrol lol

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By *atin braTV/TS
over a year ago

bristol

yea i would so she could live with the pain of her burns

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By *ustfulbigboyMan
over a year ago

North Wales

Water as my ex is also the mother of my child.

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By *ean counterMan
over a year ago

Northants

Not really sure but I can guarantee it would cost me even more money whatever I did !

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Do my best to help lovely lady if only

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By *he turned me GreyCouple
over a year ago

Warwick and Coventry

Petrol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Diesal

As in lager, cider and blackcurrant?you mean snakebite"

Snakebite doesn’t have the blackcurrant as far as I’m aware.

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By *ripfillMan
over a year ago

Paris, New York, Hong Kong and Havant

[Removed by poster at 25/05/24 07:25:53]

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By *ickylouCouple
over a year ago

Birmingham

I Chris. Would put them out as quick as possible and take her for medial help. We shared a lot of time and have mutual respect and I still care what happens to her. We just grew apart.

Vicky. She would probably hide the lighter she started the fire with.

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By *ewSkiboo1892Man
over a year ago

Belfast

Some charcoal, a grill rack and a selection of finest steaks and sausages

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By *partharmonyCouple
over a year ago

Ruislip

"If your ex was on fire....

What would you use to put them out?

A gun.

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By *ickie76XXXMan
over a year ago

dartford

I would use a ting wisher !

As in a

Ex ring wisher

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Honestly, after everything that's happened over the last few months, I'd stand and watch him burn.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Honestly, after everything that's happened over the last few months, I'd stand and watch him burn."

I'm with you on watching em burn!

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By *omewhatSlightlyDazedMan
over a year ago

Warwick Birmingham & YamYamLand

A blanket or whatever else is at hand. Always amicable

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Honestly, after everything that's happened over the last few months, I'd stand and watch him burn.

I'm with you on watching em burn!"

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By *hippy57Man
over a year ago

Chelmsford

I admit was harsh with my comment ,without a doubt I would try my best to help

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By *nowy669Man
over a year ago

East Kilbride

I would like to say a golf shoe but she was good people so fire extinguisher

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By *istr3ssWoman
over a year ago

Stockton-on-Tees

You're assuming I'd be willing to put the fire out

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By *iltsTSgirlTV/TS
over a year ago

Chichester

"I’d try but she’d probably tell me to fuck off through the pain.

I’d probably throw some wood on to speed up the burn

Of course, only trying to help aren’t we!

When someone’s number is up it’s up. Just helping the process along smoothly

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If it was the ex wife, I would break out the marshmallows

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By *werty1999Man
over a year ago

greater Manchester

Cider and black is a different thing

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Everything I could! He's a wonderful man and the children would miss him terribly.

The ex before him? Well, everyone loves a bonfire, don't they...

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By *ustincider888Man
over a year ago

Preston Ish

I'd put them in a vacuum cupboard

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By *ittlemissFlirtyCouple
over a year ago

The bottom of the River Ankh

"I'd put them in a vacuum cupboard "

Did she suck then ??

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