FabSwingers.com forum: If your ex

By *parkle1974 OP Woman
31 weeks ago

Leeds

If your ex was on fire....

What would you use to put them out?

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By (user no longer on site)
31 weeks ago

"If your ex was on fire....

What would you use to put them out?

Which ex are we talking about

There is certainly one I would leave to it as it would no doubt just be another bid for attention.

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By *offiaCoolWoman
31 weeks ago

Kidsgrove

Whatever was to hand/available.

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By *heGateKeeperMan
31 weeks ago

Stratford

The appropriate extinguisher. My fire safety mandatory training is out of date mind you

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By *uxom redCouple
31 weeks ago

Shrewsbury

"If your ex was on fire....

What would you use to put them out?

My ex husband nothing .

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By (user no longer on site)
31 weeks ago

My thoughts as he is truly out of them.

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By *ollybirdWoman
31 weeks ago

east Cork

Can I say petrol? Technically won’t put it out but it would be so much fun

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By *rBobbMan
31 weeks ago

Birmingham

I would walk to the nearest phone box. Call someone who hopefully is out so I can leave them a message asking them to call the fire brigade

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By (user no longer on site)
31 weeks ago

A steam roller would do the job

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By *agatoXXXMan
31 weeks ago

Gone and completely forgotten.

"If your ex was on fire....

What would you use to put them out?

She's already been on fire. She's in a urn somewhere now.

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By *elaninMaverickWoman
31 weeks ago

near Putney Heath

"If your ex was on fire....

What would you use to put them out?

She's already been on fire. She's in a urn somewhere now."

Cackle.

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By *TG3Man
31 weeks ago

Dorchester

"If your ex was on fire....

What would you use to put them out?

"
Water shes lovely and a blanket

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By *eeLikesLotsMan
31 weeks ago

Atherton

"Can I say petrol? Technically won’t put it out but it would be so much fun

To be fair, the fire would go out eventually, and probably a lot sooner!

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By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple
31 weeks ago

Leeds

I wouldn’t, I’d just laugh and carry on walking.

Laters Krueger.

The mr

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By *elaninMaverickWoman
31 weeks ago

near Putney Heath

"If your ex was on fire....

What would you use to put them out?

some exes yes

the former husband.... I wanna say no but then I know my dumb moral conscience will kick in.....

Me: Jesus! Help!

Jesus: It's fate. It has to happen.

Satan: will you both shut up and let me do my job with the eternal fires of hell.

God: if the three of you don't quit it! Everyone will be in trouble!!

Omg a religious swinger.

Always a maverick.

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By *TG3Man
31 weeks ago

Dorchester

"If your ex was on fire....

What would you use to put them out?

some exes yes

the former husband.... I wanna say no but then I know my dumb moral conscience will kick in.....

Me: Jesus! Help!

Jesus: It's fate. It has to happen.

Satan: will you both shut up and let me do my job with the eternal fires of hell.

God: if the three of you don't quit it! Everyone will be in trouble!!

Omg a religious swinger.

Always a maverick.

"
you talking to your inner self?

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By *nitterWoman
31 weeks ago

the land of tall tales and yarn

"If your ex was on fire....

What would you use to put them out?

some exes yes

the former husband.... I wanna say no but then I know my dumb moral conscience will kick in.....

Me: Jesus! Help!

Jesus: It's fate. It has to happen.

Satan: will you both shut up and let me do my job with the eternal fires of hell.

God: if the three of you don't quit it! Everyone will be in trouble!!

Omg a religious swinger.

Always a maverick.

Just thank you that has made my day

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By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple
31 weeks ago

Leeds

Probably water.

Mrs

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By *till gameMan
31 weeks ago

two doors down

I’d sprint indoors, grab a few burgers and sausages, be a shame to waste and not have a bbq

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By *ather WickmasMan
31 weeks ago

The Continental

Water.

No matter how displeasing the person, I couldn’t watch them burning to death.

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By *elloWoman
31 weeks ago

alpha centauri

"If your ex was on fire....

What would you use to put them out?

If it's my ex (who is also on this site, not sure if he pops into the forums) why would I put him out, it probably took awhile for me to get it started in the first place

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By *coobyABCMan
31 weeks ago

Aberdeen

Is it too kinky to pee on them

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By (user no longer on site)
31 weeks ago

"If your ex was on fire....

What would you use to put them out?

I don't carry those sort of grudges in life. Hate only makes you angry and look a dick.

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By *mmaleiaWoman
31 weeks ago

Trowbridge

All my exs are ok except 1, that 1 i’d crack out the marshmallows

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By *ivemealadybonerWoman
31 weeks ago

somewhere

I'll try and take a pee on him, it's 50/50 if I get performance anxiety or I have much in the tank

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By *olly_chromaticTV/TS
31 weeks ago

Stockport

I still deeply love all my exes, all the way back to my first kiss with the girl over the road at age 5. I guess that I'm just a romantic and I've been lucky enough that loves might have come and gone, but have never ended with either of us being a cunt to the other.

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By *lowupdollTV/TS
31 weeks ago

Herts/Beds/Lomdon

I wouldn’t be cruel.

They’re saving on heating bills, let em burn.

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By (user no longer on site)
31 weeks ago

No problem with any previous ex, even the one who stalked me for a time.

However, former bosses, now that is a different matter.

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By *reyToTheFairiesWoman
31 weeks ago

Carlisle usually

There's one I wouldn't. Walking away is the only available option for that dickhead.

The rest I'd make a genuine attempt with the most viable extinguishing materials available

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By *ansoffateMan
31 weeks ago

Sagittarius A

I'd rather drink turpentine and piss on a brush fire.

No I'd assist of course, water wet blanket, fire blanket that kind of thing.

There may be a short contemplative pause, but nothing that would lead to lasting damage.

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By *atnip make me purrWoman
31 weeks ago

Reading

Of course. I'm not a monster.

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By *elaninMaverickWoman
31 weeks ago

near Putney Heath

"If your ex was on fire....

What would you use to put them out?

some exes yes

the former husband.... I wanna say no but then I know my dumb moral conscience will kick in.....

Me: Jesus! Help!

Jesus: It's fate. It has to happen.

Satan: will you both shut up and let me do my job with the eternal fires of hell.

God: if the three of you don't quit it! Everyone will be in trouble!!

Omg a religious swinger.

Always a maverick.

you talking to your inner self?

Always. I've got two inner child toddlers in my brain. a BPD one and an autistic one. Just which one is the demon and which one is the angel.

The conscience thing is separate though.

Complex brain. Filled with lots of useless stuff. Lol!

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By *TG3Man
31 weeks ago

Dorchester

"If your ex was on fire....

What would you use to put them out?

some exes yes

the former husband.... I wanna say no but then I know my dumb moral conscience will kick in.....

Me: Jesus! Help!

Jesus: It's fate. It has to happen.

Satan: will you both shut up and let me do my job with the eternal fires of hell.

God: if the three of you don't quit it! Everyone will be in trouble!!

Omg a religious swinger.

Always a maverick.

you talking to your inner self?

Always. I've got two inner child toddlers in my brain. a BPD one and an autistic one. Just which one is the demon and which one is the angel.

The conscience thing is separate though.

Complex brain. Filled with lots of useless stuff. Lol!"
Well talk to me instead I'm a psychiatrist

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By *agnar73Man
31 weeks ago

glasgow-ish

"If your ex was on fire....

What would you use to put them out?

There’s one that the ‘wouldn’t piss on’ phrase is spot on.

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By *elaninMaverickWoman
31 weeks ago

near Putney Heath

"If your ex was on fire....

What would you use to put them out?

I don't carry those sort of grudges in life. Hate only makes you angry and look a dick."

In my world, self-protection equals looking like a dick.

You can forgive someone but that doesn't mean you have the responsibility of saving them from themselves....especially if you know they will set you on fire too...because they are that twisted.

Nah let the professionals and the authorities handle them. I don't have capacity to help someone who intentionally sets themselves on fire.

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By *icentiousCouple
31 weeks ago

Up on them there hills

Nothing, dragons like fire.

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By *ot to giggleWoman
31 weeks ago

Coventry

Would I!

Well he already burns in hell, might see if i can find a fire extinguisher!

Wouldn't have it on my conscious that i hadn't tried.

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By *estman for the jobMan
31 weeks ago

Lincolnshire

My foot with the words u should never play with fire bitch ,only kidding

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By *elaninMaverickWoman
31 weeks ago

near Putney Heath

"If your ex was on fire....

What would you use to put them out?

some exes yes

the former husband.... I wanna say no but then I know my dumb moral conscience will kick in.....

Me: Jesus! Help!

Jesus: It's fate. It has to happen.

Satan: will you both shut up and let me do my job with the eternal fires of hell.

God: if the three of you don't quit it! Everyone will be in trouble!!

Omg a religious swinger.

Always a maverick.

you talking to your inner self?

Always. I've got two inner child toddlers in my brain. a BPD one and an autistic one. Just which one is the demon and which one is the angel.

The conscience thing is separate though.

Complex brain. Filled with lots of useless stuff. Lol!Well talk to me instead I'm a psychiatrist

Yeah we don't like psychiatrists. Lol! Sorry.

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By (user no longer on site)
31 weeks ago

"If your ex was on fire....

What would you use to put them out?

If it's my ex (who is also on this site, not sure if he pops into the forums) why would I put him out, it probably took awhile for me to get it started in the first place

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By *ighland couple 99Couple
31 weeks ago

Inverness

Probably just start roasting marshmallows

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By *elaninMaverickWoman
31 weeks ago

near Putney Heath

"Is it too kinky to pee on them"

Just don't get your willy burnt in the process....Metaphorically and realistically. Lol!

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By *TG3Man
31 weeks ago

Dorchester

"If your ex was on fire....

What would you use to put them out?

some exes yes

the former husband.... I wanna say no but then I know my dumb moral conscience will kick in.....

Me: Jesus! Help!

Jesus: It's fate. It has to happen.

Satan: will you both shut up and let me do my job with the eternal fires of hell.

God: if the three of you don't quit it! Everyone will be in trouble!!

Omg a religious swinger.

Always a maverick.

you talking to your inner self?

Always. I've got two inner child toddlers in my brain. a BPD one and an autistic one. Just which one is the demon and which one is the angel.

The conscience thing is separate though.

Complex brain. Filled with lots of useless stuff. Lol!Well talk to me instead I'm a psychiatrist

Yeah we don't like psychiatrists. Lol! Sorry.

"
lie on my bed and let me get to the bottom of this

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By *avexxMan
31 weeks ago

cheshire

"Probably just start roasting marshmallows

"
,, now this made me laugh

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By *agnar73Man
31 weeks ago

glasgow-ish

"Is it too kinky to pee on them

Just don't get your willy burnt in the process....Metaphorically and realistically. Lol!"

Big question is why would you even be near them when they went flambé

I’d be happy just getting a text

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By *ornycougaWoman
31 weeks ago

Wherever I lay my hat

An axe

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By *ex HolesMan
31 weeks ago

Up North

That’d be a miracle cause she’s under the patio

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By *issBellaWoman
31 weeks ago

Wales

"Is it too kinky to pee on them

Just don't get your willy burnt in the process....Metaphorically and realistically. Lol!

Big question is why would you even be near them when they went flambé

I’d be happy just getting a text "

This, only afterwards

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By *heel markMan
31 weeks ago

beside the sea

She was not long ago and I would swap places in a heartbeat if my boys could have there mam back .

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By *iltsTSgirlTV/TS
31 weeks ago

chichester

"If your ex was on fire....

What would you use to put them out?

Nothing

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By *ascaIMan
31 weeks ago

Cheshire Liverpool Manchester

I’d try but she’d probably tell me to fuck off through the pain.

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By *iltsTSgirlTV/TS
31 weeks ago

chichester

"I’d try but she’d probably tell me to fuck off through the pain. "

I’d probably throw some wood on to speed up the burn

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By (user no longer on site)
31 weeks ago

Yes I would put them out past is the past we both moved on and on my side hold no ill will or grudges so why not help someone

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By *he DM is always rightMan
31 weeks ago

Derby

Wait until they were medium rare then carve a slice.

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By *uminousMan
31 weeks ago

hillingdon

Petrol and sulphuric acid

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By *agnar73Man
31 weeks ago

glasgow-ish

"Is it too kinky to pee on them

Just don't get your willy burnt in the process....Metaphorically and realistically. Lol!

Big question is why would you even be near them when they went flambé

I’d be happy just getting a text

This, only afterwards

Yep.

‘Oh dear, that’s a pity’

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By *oo74Man
31 weeks ago

dunstable

Petrol

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By *ascaIMan
31 weeks ago

Cheshire Liverpool Manchester

"I’d try but she’d probably tell me to fuck off through the pain.

I’d probably throw some wood on to speed up the burn

Of course, only trying to help aren’t we!

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By *issBellaWoman
31 weeks ago

Wales

"Is it too kinky to pee on them

Just don't get your willy burnt in the process....Metaphorically and realistically. Lol!

Big question is why would you even be near them when they went flambé

I’d be happy just getting a text

This, only afterwards

Yep.

‘Oh dear, that’s a pity’"

I really wish I'd have known sooner so I could help..

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By *orace99Man
31 weeks ago

York

"If your ex was on fire....

What would you use to put them out?

Petrol....

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By *ad NannaWoman
31 weeks ago

East London

My coat, or whatever was near me.

Water, if I can get to it.

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By *gent CoulsonMan
31 weeks ago

Secret hideaway in the pennines

Nothing

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By (user no longer on site)
31 weeks ago

A gallon of petrol

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By *ittlebirdWoman
31 weeks ago

The Big Smoke

"If your ex was on fire....

What would you use to put them out?

First of all I would ask how in the hell did he dig himself out from under the patio

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By *929Man
31 weeks ago

newcastle

A pitchfork

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By *esthetic21Man
31 weeks ago

Birmingham/Bristol

If anyone was on fire I'd rush to help them. Because that's how I am

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
31 weeks ago

little house on the praire

To be honest I don't dislike anyone enough to leave them burning. I've made peace with my past

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
31 weeks ago

little house on the praire

oh and I'd put them out with the closest thing to extinguish a fire

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By *teveanddebsCouple
31 weeks ago

Norwich

For one of them I'd contact the fire brigade.

How much is a second class stamp now?

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By *aughtyLisa341Woman
31 weeks ago

Ripley

A fucking gallon of unleaded bastard x

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By (user no longer on site)
31 weeks ago

There’s many exes lol I’d put them all out with gasoline. Put them out of their misery haha

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By (user no longer on site)
31 weeks ago

Petrol

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By *cottishVikingBearMan
31 weeks ago

N. London

Depends on how long it took me to sell tickets...

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By *B69Woman
31 weeks ago

Wiltshire

Nothing

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By *nnCeeWoman
31 weeks ago

East of Eden, West of Hell

"If your ex was on fire....

What would you use to put them out?

If it's my ex (who is also on this site, not sure if he pops into the forums) why would I put him out, it probably took awhile for me to get it started in the first place

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By (user no longer on site)
31 weeks ago

A fire extinguisher.

I have a friendly relationship with all of my exes.

I often wonder why so few people can do the same..

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By (user no longer on site)
31 weeks ago

Wouldn't put him out....I would want him to be conscious as long as possible

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By *nnCeeWoman
31 weeks ago

East of Eden, West of Hell

I'd try and extinguish the flames of anyone who was on fire, ex or not. That would be a flipping hideous way to go.

I don't actually hate anyb of my exes.

None of them ever did me a dirty (that I'm aware of).

There are people I don't like very much, and a few whom I've held grudges against for far too long. I wish I could forget them, but they're so deeply etched, they knew exactly what they were doing at the time... perhaps one say

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By *rgasmatron1970Man
31 weeks ago

Bromley

Napalm

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By *reative-mindMan
31 weeks ago

Exeter

Marshmallows

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By *eordieJeansCouple
31 weeks ago

Newcastle upon Tyne

Can I just light a cigar on the flames and do a cool guy walk off?

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By (user no longer on site)
31 weeks ago

Diesal

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By (user no longer on site)
31 weeks ago

"Diesal"

Or diesel even

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By *eordieJeansCouple
31 weeks ago

Newcastle upon Tyne

"Diesal"

As in lager, cider and blackcurrant?

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By (user no longer on site)
31 weeks ago

"Diesal

As in lager, cider and blackcurrant?"

Vin

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By *eordieJeansCouple
31 weeks ago

Newcastle upon Tyne

"Diesal

As in lager, cider and blackcurrant?

Vin"

Please don’t throw Groot at your burning ex.

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By *nnCeeWoman
31 weeks ago

East of Eden, West of Hell

"Diesal

As in lager, cider and blackcurrant?

Vin

Please don’t throw Groot at your burning ex."

I am Groot!!

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By *ex HolesMan
31 weeks ago

Up North

"Diesal"

Their jeans are good

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By *ake_or_deathMan
31 weeks ago

Manchester

"If your ex was on fire....

What would you use to put them out?

Water - we're still on excellent terms.

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By (user no longer on site)
31 weeks ago

An extinguisher to put the fire and then some itchy powder or something to help with the healing

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By *elboy1978Man
31 weeks ago

Fellgate

Petrol

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By (user no longer on site)
31 weeks ago

Erm... Maybe some accelerant rather than extinguish....

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By *rgasmatron1970Man
31 weeks ago

Bromley

"Erm... Maybe some accelerant rather than extinguish....

Napalm works best

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By *ealMissShadyWoman
31 weeks ago

St Albans/ Welsh Borders

Petrol

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By *esthetic21Man
31 weeks ago

Birmingham/Bristol

"Diesal

As in lager, cider and blackcurrant?"
you mean snakebite

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By *ucka39Man
31 weeks ago

Newcastle

I'd try some music I doubt anyone has ever tried

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By *agnar73Man
31 weeks ago

glasgow-ish

"Is it too kinky to pee on them

Just don't get your willy burnt in the process....Metaphorically and realistically. Lol!

Big question is why would you even be near them when they went flambé

I’d be happy just getting a text

This, only afterwards

Yep.

‘Oh dear, that’s a pity’

I really wish I'd have known sooner so I could help..

Classier approach than saying petrol/diesel imo.

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By *4bimMan
31 weeks ago

Farnborough Hampshire

Walking away and silence hurts them more

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By *heblowyouknow24Woman
31 weeks ago

norwich

Nothing

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By *ivpoolmanMan
31 weeks ago

Liverpool

"Nothing

Confetti lol

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By *onjudgesCouple (MM)
31 weeks ago

Carlisle

Too soggy to burn.

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By *avey daveMan
31 weeks ago

Rochdale

A ton of cement

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By *hippy57Man
31 weeks ago

Chelmsford

Petrol lol

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By *atin braTV/TS
31 weeks ago

bristol

yea i would so she could live with the pain of her burns

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By *ustfulbigboyMan
31 weeks ago

North Wales

Water as my ex is also the mother of my child.

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By *ean counterMan
31 weeks ago

Kettering

Not really sure but I can guarantee it would cost me even more money whatever I did !

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By (user no longer on site)
31 weeks ago

Do my best to help lovely lady if only

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By *he turned me GreyCouple
31 weeks ago

Warwick and Coventry

Petrol

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By *eordieJeansCouple
31 weeks ago

Newcastle upon Tyne

"Diesal

As in lager, cider and blackcurrant?you mean snakebite"

Snakebite doesn’t have the blackcurrant as far as I’m aware.

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By *ripfillMan
31 weeks ago

Paris, New York, Hong Kong and Havant

[Removed by poster at 25/05/24 07:25:53]

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By *ickylouCouple
31 weeks ago

I Chris. Would put them out as quick as possible and take her for medial help. We shared a lot of time and have mutual respect and I still care what happens to her. We just grew apart.

Vicky. She would probably hide the lighter she started the fire with.

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By *ewSkiboo1892Man
30 weeks ago

Belfast

Some charcoal, a grill rack and a selection of finest steaks and sausages

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By *partharmonyCouple
30 weeks ago

Ruislip

"If your ex was on fire....

What would you use to put them out?

A gun.

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By *ickie76XXXMan
30 weeks ago

dartford

I would use a ting wisher !

As in a

Ex ring wisher

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By (user no longer on site)
30 weeks ago

Honestly, after everything that's happened over the last few months, I'd stand and watch him burn.

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By *tacy.TWoman
30 weeks ago

luton

"Honestly, after everything that's happened over the last few months, I'd stand and watch him burn."

I'm with you on watching em burn!

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By *omewhatSlightlyDazedMan
30 weeks ago

Warwick Birmingham & YamYamLand

A blanket or whatever else is at hand. Always amicable

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By (user no longer on site)
30 weeks ago

"Honestly, after everything that's happened over the last few months, I'd stand and watch him burn.

I'm with you on watching em burn!"

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By *hippy57Man
30 weeks ago

Chelmsford

I admit was harsh with my comment ,without a doubt I would try my best to help

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By *ez669Man
30 weeks ago

East Kilbride

I would like to say a golf shoe but she was good people so fire extinguisher

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By *istr3ssWoman
30 weeks ago

Stockton-on-Tees

You're assuming I'd be willing to put the fire out

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By *iltsTSgirlTV/TS
30 weeks ago

chichester

"I’d try but she’d probably tell me to fuck off through the pain.

I’d probably throw some wood on to speed up the burn

Of course, only trying to help aren’t we!

When someone’s number is up it’s up. Just helping the process along smoothly

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By *wiss Army KnifeMan
30 weeks ago

Second star to the right…

If it was the ex wife, I would break out the marshmallows

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By *werty1999Man
30 weeks ago

greater Manchester

Cider and black is a different thing

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By *ell GwynnWoman
30 weeks ago

North Yorkshire

Everything I could! He's a wonderful man and the children would miss him terribly.

The ex before him? Well, everyone loves a bonfire, don't they...

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By *ustincider888Man
30 weeks ago

Preston Ish

I'd put them in a vacuum cupboard

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By *ittlemissTinselTitsCouple
30 weeks ago

Southampton

"I'd put them in a vacuum cupboard "

Did she suck then ??

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