FabSwingers.com forum: Could you please explain?

By (user no longer on site) OP
45 weeks ago

I've a question about lads/boys. Why are lots of men referring to themselves like this in their 40s and 50s?

What do you need explaining?

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By (user no longer on site)
45 weeks ago

It’s a mindset not an age thing

Hanging out with the lads/boys

Does it displease you?

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By *ora the explorerWoman
45 weeks ago

Paradise, Herts

To be fair. I still say “I’m going out with the girls”

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By (user no longer on site)
45 weeks ago

"To be fair. I still say “I’m going out with the girls”"

No, no. Men bad, Nora!

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By *mf123Man
45 weeks ago

with one foot out the door

Its like a call women lasses its just how i speak

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By (user no longer on site)
45 weeks ago

We never truly grow up

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By (user no longer on site) OP
45 weeks ago

"It’s a mindset not an age thing

Hanging out with the lads/boys

Does it displease you?"

I can understand the hanging out bit. Absolutely. But calling yourself Boy73636 or YorkshireLad and sprinkling the word in a profile and message? It's off putting. As I'd expect it would be if I said I was a girl.

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By *ools and the brainCouple
45 weeks ago

couple, us we him her.

Women in their 40's having a girls night out.

It's just a turn of phrase no harm in it.

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By *ellhungvweMan
45 weeks ago

Cheltenham

Why do things have to change just based on your age? I reckon most people use the same language throughout their lives and if you have always said boys and girls then that is what it is.

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By (user no longer on site)
45 weeks ago

"It’s a mindset not an age thing

Hanging out with the lads/boys

Does it displease you?

Guys. It’s off putting. Stop doing what you want and listen. Listen carefully. Don’t want to displease anyone.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
45 weeks ago

It was just my question that I've been pondering. What would anyone else like an explanation of?

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By *ascaIMan
45 weeks ago

Cheshire Liverpool Manchester

I’d never describe myself as a lad/boy but would say I’m out with the lads tonight. Never really thought anything of it.

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By *ora the explorerWoman
45 weeks ago

Paradise, Herts

"It was just my question that I've been pondering. What would anyone else like an explanation of?"

Ahhhhh! I think it could have been read wrong. I read it as what do those people who do this need explaining

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By (user no longer on site) OP
45 weeks ago

"It’s a mindset not an age thing

Hanging out with the lads/boys

Does it displease you?

Guys. It’s off putting. Stop doing what you want and listen. Listen carefully. Don’t want to displease anyone. "

Feel better now sweetie?

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By *ools and the brainCouple
45 weeks ago

couple, us we him her.

Lot's of women on here get really shitty with some guy's if they refer to them as girls.

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By (user no longer on site)
45 weeks ago

"Why do things have to change just based on your age? I reckon most people use the same language throughout their lives and if you have always said boys and girls then that is what it is."

I think this is what it is. I've used lads and boys when greeting my mates. I'm 28 but if I use it enough times, I'll use it into my 40s and 50s.

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By *ora the explorerWoman
45 weeks ago

Paradise, Herts

"Lot's of women on here get really shitty with some guy's if they refer to them as girls."

They really do!

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By (user no longer on site)
45 weeks ago

I said lads in work and I nearly got sent to the Gulag

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By (user no longer on site)
45 weeks ago

"It’s a mindset not an age thing

Hanging out with the lads/boys

Does it displease you?

Guys. It’s off putting. Stop doing what you want and listen. Listen carefully. Don’t want to displease anyone.

Feel better now sweetie?"

Absolutely. I’d hate for you to be put off by something. We men must conform

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By (user no longer on site) OP
45 weeks ago

"I’d never describe myself as a lad/boy but would say I’m out with the lads tonight. Never really thought anything of it. "

I've just had a string of messages from guys with lad or boy in their username. Going out with the lads or boys seems normal - but describing yourself as one at 55. Hmm.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
45 weeks ago

"It’s a mindset not an age thing

Hanging out with the lads/boys

Does it displease you?

Guys. It’s off putting. Stop doing what you want and listen. Listen carefully. Don’t want to displease anyone.

Feel better now sweetie?

Absolutely. I’d hate for you to be put off by something. We men must conform "

I'm so glad you've got my back.

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By *eroLondonMan
45 weeks ago

Covent Garden

It's when they start calling themselves Foetus123 is when you need to start worrying.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
45 weeks ago

"It was just my question that I've been pondering. What would anyone else like an explanation of?

Ahhhhh! I think it could have been read wrong. I read it as what do those people who do this need explaining

. "

Oh. Whoops! I didn't want to do a thread just about my daft question. Guess I wasn't clear.

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By *eroLondonMan
45 weeks ago

Covent Garden

"Why do things have to change just based on your age? I reckon most people use the same language throughout their lives and if you have always said boys and girls then that is what it is.

I think this is what it is. I've used lads and boys when greeting my mates. I'm 28 but if I use it enough times, I'll use it into my 40s and 50s."

•

That won't happen for another 1ØØ years you whippersnapper!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
45 weeks ago

"I said lads in work and I nearly got sent to the Gulag

Sorry bout that

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By *ascaIMan
45 weeks ago

Cheshire Liverpool Manchester

"It's when they start calling themselves Foetus123 is when you need to start worrying."

I do hope Foetus123 responds to this to defend himself

You can’t just out him like that.

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By *aith SkynbyrdWoman
45 weeks ago

Somewhere else

"It's when they start calling themselves Foetus123 is when you need to start worrying."

Aaaaaaaand you just told everyone who Mr Skynbyrd is.

… maybe

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By *ora the explorerWoman
45 weeks ago

Paradise, Herts

"It was just my question that I've been pondering. What would anyone else like an explanation of?

Ahhhhh! I think it could have been read wrong. I read it as what do those people who do this need explaining

Oh. Whoops! I didn't want to do a thread just about my daft question. Guess I wasn't clear.

Oh it’ll be me. I’m crap at reading threads properly.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
45 weeks ago

"Why do things have to change just based on your age? I reckon most people use the same language throughout their lives and if you have always said boys and girls then that is what it is.

I think this is what it is. I've used lads and boys when greeting my mates. I'm 28 but if I use it enough times, I'll use it into my 40s and 50s."

Omg are you 28?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
45 weeks ago

"It's when they start calling themselves Foetus123 is when you need to start worrying.

I do hope Foetus123 responds to this to defend himself

You can’t just out him like that. "

Yeah, Nero. And another thing....

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By *aith SkynbyrdWoman
45 weeks ago

Somewhere else

"It's when they start calling themselves Foetus123 is when you need to start worrying.

I do hope Foetus123 responds to this to defend himself

You can’t just out him like that.

Yeah, Nero. And another thing....

No, damn it. /I/ am Spartacus!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
45 weeks ago

"Lot's of women on here get really shitty with some guy's if they refer to them as girls."

Do women call themselves girls? Other than "night out with the girls?"

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By *obilebottomMan
45 weeks ago

All over

To be fair it used to surprise me when someone called themeselves a lad in their 60s but each to their own. It is a bit like when a young person calls a much older one mate. It is a bit strange to me personally but I know is meant well and not disrespectfully so not that bothered anymore. However people in customer services like shop assistants when paying your bill saying thanks mate does sound unprofessional to me but I know they just been friendly so so be it. No harm done really

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By *eroLondonMan
45 weeks ago

Covent Garden

"It's when they start calling themselves Foetus123 is when you need to start worrying.

I do hope Foetus123 responds to this to defend himself

You can’t just out him like that. "

•

Good grief! There ·is· a Foetus123! And to think there's another 122 of them preceding that. I need a gin!

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By (user no longer on site)
45 weeks ago

Some people find these terms infantalising, others use them to convey a young at heart spirit, others might use them in a more ageless way, others may be in to age play and want to convey that.

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By *TG3Man
45 weeks ago

Dorchester

No matter what age you are you are one of the lads

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By *ooBulMan
45 weeks ago

Missin’ Yo’ Kissin’

Cos it's way shorter than saying:-

Dave,

Wayne,

Gary,

Mick,

Chinese Dave,

Budgie,

Clint,

Kevin....

Zack

Dazza

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By *ealitybitesMan
45 weeks ago

Belfast

A customer calls me young fella even though he is 5 years younger than me. I've never spoken the word lad out loud because it's not a word or term I ever use.

More often than not if referring to others I'll say men or guys.

Even when I was a boy I don't remember saying I was going out with the boys.

Lad is a colloquialism here in parts though so I can see why some use it.

It is used when greeting someone as well."All right lad?" but again something I've never said.

Another term is "You're some boy!" which isn't age related either and more to do with pointing out that they have done something out of the ordinary.

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By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple
45 weeks ago

Leeds

It's a strange one it bugs me when people are looking for "girls" and I despise being called a "girl" during messages however I'm a bit of a hypocrite because I do say I'm chatting with the girls, girls night out etc it's just what comes to mind.

Mrs

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By *ortyairCouple
45 weeks ago

Wallasey

I think girls and lads are used quite a bit throughout most people's adults lives. Things like describing someone as a 'girlie girl' or 'one of the girls' paints a picture of femininity or being part of a group.

I think at times it just rolls off the tounge better. I'd like to think I am a good friend and abide by a 'girls code' and would not shit on another woman intentionally. Doesn't sound right as a 'womans code'.

Think the same goes for the fellas. I don't think it's got much to do with age personally but maybe it's just me, Mrs x

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By *imi_RougeWoman
45 weeks ago

Portsmouth

I know exactly what you mean... Young lad looking for fun etc etc and they're over 35, hate to break it to you mate, you're not a young lad anymore.

I just need an explanation for why men? Just that.. why?

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
45 weeks ago

Central

I've seen some usernames of men in their 60s include it

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By *stwo2023Couple
45 weeks ago

Worcester

"It’s a mindset not an age thing

Hanging out with the lads/boys

Does it displease you?

Guys. It’s off putting. Stop doing what you want and listen. Listen carefully. Don’t want to displease anyone. "

Bit if a jump there

Evie

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By (user no longer on site) OP
45 weeks ago

"It’s a mindset not an age thing

Hanging out with the lads/boys

Does it displease you?

Guys. It’s off putting. Stop doing what you want and listen. Listen carefully. Don’t want to displease anyone.

Bit if a jump there

Evie"

He always likes to interpret what women say that way.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
45 weeks ago

"I've seen some usernames of men in their 60s include it

Yep.

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By *ellinever70Woman
45 weeks ago

Ayrshire

Have you tried asking said men why?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
45 weeks ago

"Some people find these terms infantalising, others use them to convey a young at heart spirit, others might use them in a more ageless way, others may be in to age play and want to convey that."

That's a good explanation. Men who choose to use those words about themselves aren't going to be for me, but I am a bit clearer about why now!

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By *mooth shaftMan
45 weeks ago

Edinburgh

Yeah as a bloke in his fifties I find it funny when guys 40 plus refer to themselves a lads. Your fellas, guys or men not lads!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
45 weeks ago

"Have you tried asking said men why?

Yes

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By *elix SightedMan
45 weeks ago

Cloud 8

"I've a question about lads/boys. Why are lots of men referring to themselves like this in their 40s and 50s?

What do you need explaining? "

For me it’s just less formal and I’m usually being daft/playing on lazy stereotypes ie “Because I’m a boy and we can’t multitask” etc.

I’ve been called out many times for referring to someone as a girl instead of a woman. As if I really think they’re 12!! It’s just casual language.

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By *elix SightedMan
45 weeks ago

Cloud 8

Although I do think male profile names like ‘lad4fuknrtnow’ or ‘bigdickboi’ are juvenile at the best of times, let alone if they’re 48.

**these profiles are fictional and any resemblance to any profile living or dead is purely coincidental.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
45 weeks ago

"A customer calls me young fella even though he is 5 years younger than me. I've never spoken the word lad out loud because it's not a word or term I ever use.

More often than not if referring to others I'll say men or guys.

Even when I was a boy I don't remember saying I was going out with the boys.

Lad is a colloquialism here in parts though so I can see why some use it.

It is used when greeting someone as well."All right lad?" but again something I've never said.

Another term is "You're some boy!" which isn't age related either and more to do with pointing out that they have done something out of the ordinary. "

I don't think I've even called my son a lad at any point. I guess it's just what people grow up with, but applying girl/lass to women and boy/lad to men seems infantilising. Don't think I will change my view but I wouldn't say anything to people.

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By (user no longer on site)
45 weeks ago

"To be fair. I still say “I’m going out with the girls”"

Completely normal. I call my mates the boys. Words don’t have to be so rigid all the time.

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By *adCherriesCouple
45 weeks ago

Cheshire/Northwest

What about women saying they are going out with the girls in their 40s/50s?

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By (user no longer on site)
45 weeks ago

Still need it explaining why older generations hate seeing younger generations happy and enjoying themselves.

-Hate seeing kids making TikToks or talking to/ playing with their friends online for example.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
45 weeks ago

"Although I do think male profile names like ‘lad4fuknrtnow’ or ‘bigdickboi’ are juvenile at the best of times, let alone if they’re 48.

**these profiles are fictional and any resemblance to any profile living or dead is purely coincidental."

Pretty darn close to the profiles that have messaged me!

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By *eroLondonMan
45 weeks ago

Covent Garden

"To be fair. I still say “I’m going out with the girls”

Completely normal. I call my mates the boys.

Women don’t have to be so frigid all the time."

•

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By (user no longer on site) OP
45 weeks ago

"To be fair. I still say “I’m going out with the girls”

Completely normal. I call my mates the boys.

Women don’t have to be so frigid all the time.

•

Strike Two....

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By (user no longer on site)
45 weeks ago

I use girls /ladies all the time and see nothing wrong with it... It feels more youthful.. Would you enter a bar and say 'hi women??'...

It makes me feel really old when people say ladies /women... I do think it's maybe an age thing - is it that the younger you are, the less inclined you want to be viewed as young because it implies immaturity /inexperience /less in control +powerful??

Honestly I take zero offence to people using girls,ladies, women, females, males, boys, men.. But there are definitely people on fab who would rip you a new ass hole

I would hesitate to refer to a man on here as a 'boy' for fear of offending then... Maybe I have double standards!?!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
45 weeks ago

"What about women saying they are going out with the girls in their 40s/50s? "

What about them? I commented on men here referring to themselves as lads and boys. Do women have usernames in the same vein?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
45 weeks ago

"I use girls /ladies all the time and see nothing wrong with it... It feels more youthful.. Would you enter a bar and say 'hi women??'...

Honestly I take zero offence to people using girls,ladies, women, females, males, boys, men.. But there are definitely people on fab who would rip you a new ass hole

I would hesitate to refer to a man on here as a 'boy' for fear of offending then... Maybe I have double standards!?! "

I haven't said I take offence at it. It just mystifies me and I find it somewhat infantilising. I don't call my friends girls. More likely "hello ladies".

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By *adCherriesCouple
45 weeks ago

Cheshire/Northwest

"What about women saying they are going out with the girls in their 40s/50s?

What about them? I commented on men here referring to themselves as lads and boys. Do women have usernames in the same vein?"

Lots of women here in their 40s/50s refer to themselves as girls? Its a very 'mumsnet' type lets have a go at the men type thread.

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By *ealMissShadyWoman
45 weeks ago

St Albans/ Welsh Borders

"I've a question about lads/boys. Why are lots of men referring to themselves like this in their 40s and 50s?

What do you need explaining? "

Because they can, no need to engage with those who do if it displeases you

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By *arlot o scaraWoman
45 weeks ago

Hell

I’d much rather they referred to themselves as lads or boys than to women as FEMALES.

Pusface from Friday Night Dinner was right, it makes them sound like serial killers

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By *ife NinjaMan
45 weeks ago

Dunfermline

"I’d much rather they referred to themselves as lads or boys than to women as FEMALES.

Pusface from Friday Night Dinner was right, it makes them sound like serial killers"

You've not met one of IT people. She insists on male/female

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By (user no longer on site) OP
45 weeks ago

"What about women saying they are going out with the girls in their 40s/50s?

What about them? I commented on men here referring to themselves as lads and boys. Do women have usernames in the same vein?

Lots of women here in their 40s/50s refer to themselves as girls? Its a very 'mumsnet' type lets have a go at the men type thread."

Do they? I don't really see women's profiles. Can I remind you of my OP?

"I've a question about lads/boys. Why are lots of men referring to themselves like this in their 40s and 50s?"

You can interpret that as having a go, you do you.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
45 weeks ago

"I've a question about lads/boys. Why are lots of men referring to themselves like this in their 40s and 50s?

What do you need explaining?

Because they can, no need to engage with those who do if it displeases you"

Jolly helpful.

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By (user no longer on site)
45 weeks ago

"I’d much rather they referred to themselves as lads or boys than to women as FEMALES.

Pusface from Friday Night Dinner was right, it makes them sound like serial killers"

‘Females’ is the ultimate red flag

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By *ackformore100Man
45 weeks ago

Tin town

"I've a question about lads/boys. Why are lots of men referring to themselves like this in their 40s and 50s?

What do you need explaining? "

What do you need explaining?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
45 weeks ago

"I’d much rather they referred to themselves as lads or boys than to women as FEMALES.

Pusface from Friday Night Dinner was right, it makes them sound like serial killers"

Pusface?

Can't say I am keen on that either - I always feel like an animal.

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By (user no longer on site)
45 weeks ago

"I’d much rather they referred to themselves as lads or boys than to women as FEMALES.

Pusface from Friday Night Dinner was right, it makes them sound like serial killers

Pusface?

Can't say I am keen on that either - I always feel like an animal. "

Alright pissface

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By (user no longer on site) OP
45 weeks ago

"I've a question about lads/boys. Why are lots of men referring to themselves like this in their 40s and 50s?

What do you need explaining?

What do you need explaining? "

What do YOU need explaining?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
45 weeks ago

"I’d much rather they referred to themselves as lads or boys than to women as FEMALES.

Pusface from Friday Night Dinner was right, it makes them sound like serial killers

Pusface?

Can't say I am keen on that either - I always feel like an animal.

Alright pissface"

Take me now!

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By (user no longer on site)
45 weeks ago

Im keeping mine mature thats why I have man in my name

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By (user no longer on site) OP
45 weeks ago

"Im keeping mine mature thats why I have man in my name "

You're SO manly!

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By *ackformore100Man
45 weeks ago

Tin town

"Lot's of women on here get really shitty with some guy's if they refer to them as girls."

The last part of that sentence is superfluous

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By (user no longer on site)
45 weeks ago

"Im keeping mine mature thats why I have man in my name

You're SO manly!

Haha thank you

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By (user no longer on site)
45 weeks ago

"I’d much rather they referred to themselves as lads or boys than to women as FEMALES.

Pusface from Friday Night Dinner was right, it makes them sound like serial killers

Pusface?

Can't say I am keen on that either - I always feel like an animal.

Alright pissface

Take me now!

"
you haven’t seen Friday night dinner have you

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By *ealMissShadyWoman
45 weeks ago

St Albans/ Welsh Borders

"I've a question about lads/boys. Why are lots of men referring to themselves like this in their 40s and 50s?

What do you need explaining?

Because they can, no need to engage with those who do if it displeases you

Jolly helpful. "

You're welcome

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By (user no longer on site) OP
45 weeks ago

"I’d much rather they referred to themselves as lads or boys than to women as FEMALES.

Pusface from Friday Night Dinner was right, it makes them sound like serial killers

Pusface?

Can't say I am keen on that either - I always feel like an animal.

Alright pissface

Take me now!

you haven’t seen Friday night dinner have you"

I can't cope with that character with the dog!

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
45 weeks ago

little house on the praire

"It’s a mindset not an age thing

Hanging out with the lads/boys

Does it displease you?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
45 weeks ago

"It’s a mindset not an age thing

Hanging out with the lads/boys

Does it displease you?

I'm just somewhat bemused. And yes, avoid them too.

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By *heGateKeeperMan
45 weeks ago

Stratford

"We never truly grow up"

^^^

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By (user no longer on site)
45 weeks ago

"I use girls /ladies all the time and see nothing wrong with it... It feels more youthful.. Would you enter a bar and say 'hi women??'...

Honestly I take zero offence to people using girls,ladies, women, females, males, boys, men.. But there are definitely people on fab who would rip you a new ass hole

I would hesitate to refer to a man on here as a 'boy' for fear of offending then... Maybe I have double standards!?! "

That's because calling someone boy is very headmistress... COME HERE, BOYYYYYY!

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By *ittle. BeaverWoman
45 weeks ago

Launceston

"Why do things have to change just based on your age? I reckon most people use the same language throughout their lives and if you have always said boys and girls then that is what it is."

I agree!

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By *100Man
45 weeks ago

Essex

I always describe myself as the bastard from 314, as anything that goes wrong in the world is usually somehow my fault.

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By *ackformore100Man
45 weeks ago

Tin town

"I’d much rather they referred to themselves as lads or boys than to women as FEMALES.

Pusface from Friday Night Dinner was right, it makes them sound like serial killers

Pusface?

Can't say I am keen on that either - I always feel like an animal.

Alright pissface

Take me now!

you haven’t seen Friday night dinner have you"

Shit on it

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By *izzy.miss.lizzyCouple
45 weeks ago

Pembrokeshire

I guess if a man says "im off out with the men" it might sound a bit... odd? Much more used to hearing "Im off with the lads" Just sounds more natural to me.

Like I would say out with the girls, not out with the women.

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