FabSwingers.com forum: Why should we fuck you, Fabsters?

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Come on, tell us the reasons

Me? Well, tbh I’d just be really, really *grateful*

But this isn’t about me, it’s about YOU, so sell yourselves to the masses on Fab!

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By *ittlebirdWoman
over a year ago

The Big Smoke

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you don't you'll never know.

(Air of mystery plus FOMO - that's gotta work, surely)

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By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago

South Wales

Because I’ll be the best time you’ve ever had!

(I won’t really - I don’t do anal)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Because I’ll be the best time you’ve ever had!

(I won’t really - I don’t do anal)"

Tag team?

I'll do the anal, you do the other stuff, bingo!

Like a sexy theme park!

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By *illy IdolMan
over a year ago

Midlands

Because I won't be around forever. Join the elite club

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By *eliWoman
over a year ago

With my enthusiasm as someone* dubbed it this afternoon in a thread... I'd probably make you feel like a god/goddess for the half hour you last. Who doesn't want that level of enthusiasm in their life?

*if you're that someone, I'm tickled don't worry.

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By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago

South Wales

"Because I’ll be the best time you’ve ever had!

(I won’t really - I don’t do anal)

Tag team?

I'll do the anal, you do the other stuff, bingo!

Like a sexy theme park! "

Yes! They could tap out when they’re too tired to cum for the 20th time!!

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By *ebauchedDeviantsPt2Couple
over a year ago

Cumbria

I’ve got a lovely tight arse x

Mr DD

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By *ansoffateMan
over a year ago

Sagittarius A

You shouldn't really you shouldn't.

It's a total waste of time.

I'm a complete bitch, you won't like me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You shouldn’t

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By *ansoffateMan
over a year ago

Sagittarius A

"You shouldn’t

Copycat

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By *aitonelMan
over a year ago

Liverpool

Shit shag!

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By *rsMistyPeaksWoman
over a year ago

Essex

I give out stickers afterwards

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You shouldn't really you shouldn't.

It's a total waste of time.

I'm a complete bitch, you won't like me."

What if I want to?

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By *wistedsoul35Man
over a year ago

cumbria

Because it'll be the best 36 seconds of your life

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By *ond Jimmy BondMan
over a year ago

London

You should only fuck me if you really want too, I’m not going to persuade you to. That would be so wrong

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't fall asleep after the first round....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’ll do if you’re desperate.

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By *ersiantugMan
over a year ago

Cardiff

"Because I’ll be the best time you’ve ever had!

(I won’t really - I don’t do anal)

Tag team?

I'll do the anal, you do the other stuff, bingo!

Like a sexy theme park! "

I hadn't really thought of the bingo

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Because I only have sex on days which end with a Y, and I'm not on my period. Religious reasons y'see.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I typed three things and cleared them all.

OUT!

FFS.

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By *ansoffateMan
over a year ago

Sagittarius A

"You shouldn't really you shouldn't.

It's a total waste of time.

I'm a complete bitch, you won't like me.

What if I want to?

I don't believe you...

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By *ittlebirdWoman
over a year ago

The Big Smoke

"I typed three things and cleared them all.

OUT!

FFS."

What did you put? I’m interested

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I typed three things and cleared them all.

OUT!

FFS.

What did you put? I’m interested

I'll get crucified if I type it out on here

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I typed three things and cleared them all.

OUT!

FFS."

Mind blown.

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By *edeWoman
over a year ago

the abyss

Because once you realise how shit I am you'll feel way better about your own abilities

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By *ittlebirdWoman
over a year ago

The Big Smoke

"I typed three things and cleared them all.

OUT!

FFS.

What did you put? I’m interested

I'll get crucified if I type it out on here "

Ooooffftttt

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By *hunky ChefMan
over a year ago

Norwich

I dare you

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By *ittlebirdWoman
over a year ago

The Big Smoke

"Because once you realise how shit I am you'll feel way better about your own abilities

I’m willing to take that chance…. Once or maybe 12 times

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Because once you realise how shit I am you'll feel way better about your own abilities

I could do with some of that right now

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Come on, tell us the reasons

Me? Well, tbh I’d just be really, really *grateful*

But this isn’t about me, it’s about YOU, so sell yourselves to the masses on Fab!

You don’t want to have sex with me. I’m great to look at but anything more that that would make you want to punch yourself in the dick for 5 straight minutes

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By *ansoffateMan
over a year ago

Sagittarius A

"I typed three things and cleared them all.

OUT!

FFS.

What did you put? I’m interested

I'll get crucified if I type it out on here

Ooooffftttt

Ooh the suspense...

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By *ife NinjaMan
over a year ago

Dunfermline

I smell nice, and I'll get a pizza in

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I smell nice, and I'll get a pizza in

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By *ulieAndBeefCouple
over a year ago

Manchester-ish

Ummmm...because

I am an F. B. I. agent!

You shoulda put the bunny back in the box!

Yippee ki-yay motherfucker!

Yeah, those are just sexy film dudes. I got nothing.

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By *ittlebirdWoman
over a year ago

The Big Smoke

"Ummmm...because

I am an F. B. I. agent!

You shoulda put the bunny back in the box!

Yippee ki-yay motherfucker!

Yeah, those are just sexy film dudes. I got nothing.

If you got nothing… I want it

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By *ittlebirdWoman
over a year ago

The Big Smoke

"I smell nice, and I'll get a pizza in

Ooofftttt

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You get free pizza.

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By *aissez-faireMan
over a year ago

Right behind you…. Boo

Because it will bring about world peace, end famine, stop climate change and shower the world with kindness.

Do you really want to be the person who prevents all that? Assume the position!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Because it will bring about world peace, end famine, stop climate change and shower the world with kindness.

Do you really want to be the person who prevents all that? Assume the position! "

I’m writing that line down in my notebook

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You get free pizza."

What do I get lol?

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By *ersiantugMan
over a year ago

Cardiff

Because you'll see things you'll never forget, learn things you'll never unlearn and confirm something you kinda already knew... Persiantug is 'okay', but that other freak half his age?

Definitely the best!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Because I don't know why but you probably won't regret it or something, maybe

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By *ife NinjaMan
over a year ago

Dunfermline

"You get free pizza.

What do I get lol?"

Careful caressing

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By *aizyWoman
over a year ago

west midlands

"Because I won't be around forever. Join the elite club

Do you get a badge and weekly newsletter in the elite club?

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By *ife NinjaMan
over a year ago

Dunfermline

"Because I won't be around forever. Join the elite club

Do you get a badge and weekly newsletter in the elite club?

You get your tea

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By *aizyWoman
over a year ago

west midlands

"Because I won't be around forever. Join the elite club

Do you get a badge and weekly newsletter in the elite club?

You get your tea

Do you mean dinner??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You won’t always have wet paint that you can watch dry, so you may as well come and have a go on me.

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By *edeWoman
over a year ago

the abyss

"Because once you realise how shit I am you'll feel way better about your own abilities

I could do with some of that right now

You, me and LB - it's a date

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By *ife NinjaMan
over a year ago

Dunfermline

"Because I won't be around forever. Join the elite club

Do you get a badge and weekly newsletter in the elite club?

You get your tea

Do you mean dinner??

Don't try to get around me with your exquisite good looks. Dinner

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You get free pizza.

What do I get lol?

Careful caressing

I'll take that

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By *ulieAndBeefCouple
over a year ago

Manchester-ish

"Ummmm...because

I am an F. B. I. agent!

You shoulda put the bunny back in the box!

Yippee ki-yay motherfucker!

Yeah, those are just sexy film dudes. I got nothing.

If you got nothing… I want it

Yes!

Happy days

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By *hunkyBuggaMan
over a year ago

Devon

Every person who fucks me, leaves with their own cake.

So even though the sex will be shit you’ll have cake to get over the disappointment

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By *ife NinjaMan
over a year ago

Dunfermline

"You get free pizza.

What do I get lol?

Careful caressing

I'll take that

I'll take your towel away

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Because once you realise how shit I am you'll feel way better about your own abilities

I could do with some of that right now

You, me and LB - it's a date

This gets better by the minute. I'm in..the middle hopefully.

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By *aizyWoman
over a year ago

west midlands

"Because I won't be around forever. Join the elite club

Do you get a badge and weekly newsletter in the elite club?

You get your tea

Do you mean dinner??

Don't try to get around me with your exquisite good looks. Dinner

Lets just forget about dinner or tea, we both agreed on supper we'll stick with that

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By *ife NinjaMan
over a year ago

Dunfermline

"Because I won't be around forever. Join the elite club

Do you get a badge and weekly newsletter in the elite club?

You get your tea

Do you mean dinner??

Don't try to get around me with your exquisite good looks. Dinner

Lets just forget about dinner or tea, we both agreed on supper we'll stick with that

Agreed. I'll have butter please

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By *iscean_dreamMan
over a year ago

Llanelli

Because I'm delightful, also other stuff. Just think of me as the human equivalent of a theme park but without the feeling sick part

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By *aizyWoman
over a year ago

west midlands

"Because I won't be around forever. Join the elite club

Do you get a badge and weekly newsletter in the elite club?

You get your tea

Do you mean dinner??

Don't try to get around me with your exquisite good looks. Dinner

Lets just forget about dinner or tea, we both agreed on supper we'll stick with that

Agreed. I'll have butter please

I'll make sure I stock up on the pikelets!

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By *ife NinjaMan
over a year ago

Dunfermline

"Because I won't be around forever. Join the elite club

Do you get a badge and weekly newsletter in the elite club?

You get your tea

Do you mean dinner??

Don't try to get around me with your exquisite good looks. Dinner

Lets just forget about dinner or tea, we both agreed on supper we'll stick with that

Agreed. I'll have butter please

I'll make sure I stock up on the pikelets!

Sexy and a great foodie. Keeper

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By *edeWoman
over a year ago

the abyss

"Because once you realise how shit I am you'll feel way better about your own abilities

I could do with some of that right now

You, me and LB - it's a date

This gets better by the minute. I'm in..the middle hopefully."

I'm sure LB wouldn't complain about that

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You could help me get my 'steps' in. Bouncing would register as steps?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have a nice accent and Frank Sinatra eyes.

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By *ealMissShadyWoman
over a year ago

St Albans/ Welsh Borders

Because I make a mean bacon butty

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By *ife NinjaMan
over a year ago

Dunfermline

"Because I make a mean bacon butty

Another keeper

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Because I’ll be the best time you’ve ever had!

(I won’t really - I don’t do anal)"

Wait do you have to do anal to have the best time? X

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I give out stickers afterwards

Like scout badges. Lol x

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By *odgerMooreMan
over a year ago

Nowhere

Not selling myself - im free to a good home

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"With my enthusiasm as someone* dubbed it this afternoon in a thread... I'd probably make you feel like a god/goddess for the half hour you last. Who doesn't want that level of enthusiasm in their life?

*if you're that someone, I'm tickled don't worry.

Guilty.

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By *ansoffateMan
over a year ago

Sagittarius A

"Because I make a mean bacon butty

She shoots... It's right in the top corner. The crowd are going wild!!

That had goal on it the second it left her foot!

I can stop reading my 'what do men want book now.'

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By *eliWoman
over a year ago

*if you're that someone, I'm tickled don't worry.

Guilty."

Innocent. It made me laugh a lot and was actually a rather sweet compliment. Accurate. x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You really shouldn’t. I don’t have sex anyway. I’m an innocent angelic lady.

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By *odgerMooreMan
over a year ago

Nowhere

"You really shouldn’t. I don’t have sex anyway. I’m an innocent angelic lady.

"
come this way - i have some astray over here i need to lead you to x

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By *ealMissShadyWoman
over a year ago

St Albans/ Welsh Borders

"Because I make a mean bacon butty

She shoots... It's right in the top corner. The crowd are going wild!!

That had goal on it the second it left her foot!

I can stop reading my 'what do men want book now.'

Yay!! Did I win???

*Grabs book, scribbles*

Bacon butty and a blow job....

there job done and I saved you reading 300 pages of what men want

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You shouldn't, i seriously advise against it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Training...

I'm like the entry level on a complex computer game.

If you already know what you're doing you can race through to the good parts. And you can spend hours exploring my world.

If you've never played before I'll take you through it step by step but never pretend to know all the super moves out hidden secrets. Just give you a good afternoon of distraction xx

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By *ansoffateMan
over a year ago

Sagittarius A

"Because I make a mean bacon butty

She shoots... It's right in the top corner. The crowd are going wild!!

That had goal on it the second it left her foot!

I can stop reading my 'what do men want book now.'

Yay!! Did I win???

*Grabs book, scribbles*

Bacon butty and a blow job....

there job done and I saved you reading 300 pages of what men want

Can I get your autograph too!

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By *lfacatMan
over a year ago

Kendal

*if you're that someone, I'm tickled don't worry.

If Carlsberg did reasons…

;-)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I give a decent blow job and usually have beer

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By *tevieg3222Man
over a year ago

Brighton

"I give a decent blow job and usually have beer"
can you give me a good blow job xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'll make everyone else look awesome.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You’ll have a great time! And we usually have cake in the house.. cakes good right??

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By *aughty_Smooth_OperatorMan
over a year ago

Birmingham

Because my tongue does wonders

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By *heGateKeeperMan
over a year ago

Stratford

Because I’m crap and need the practice

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By *heelerMan
over a year ago

Northants

You can never make up for the chance again.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Come on, tell us the reasons

Me? Well, tbh I’d just be really, really *grateful*

But this isn’t about me, it’s about YOU, so sell yourselves to the masses on Fab!

Not saying you should. Spend a few hours with us and you’ll certainly want to…

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By *amesBeelzebubMan
over a year ago

norwich

Out of pity

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By *obandruthCouple
over a year ago

wolverhampton

Because you want to.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Because you're Tories and that's what Tories do best.

Power to the people and freedom for Tooting!

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By *ittlemissFlirtyCouple
over a year ago

Southampton

Don't bother lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Because you're Tories and that's what Tories do best.

Power to the people and freedom for Tooting!"

So Tories are great at sex, excellent news! I always knew that Penny Mourdant was a bit of a goer, and this confirms it! Maybe pretty Priti will join in a hot sex threeway

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Because you're Tories and that's what Tories do best.

Power to the people and freedom for Tooting!

So Tories are great at sex, excellent news! I always knew that Penny Mourdant was a bit of a goer, and this confirms it! Maybe pretty Priti will join in a hot sex threeway"

Think you have that the wrong way round, there was no choice of you choosing who you could fuck. Also, the examples of how good Tories are in the sack is rather repellant, I give you Matt Hancock, Peter Bone, Chris Pincher and the tub of lard himself, BoJo.

Now if you want Tory Swingers try Neil and Christine Hamilton (sex personified).

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By *ldFashionedGentMan
over a year ago

Chelmsford

I have tons of useless trivia, so if you’re preparing for a pub quiz but are conscious of the need to exercise also then I have a solution

I also make a lovely cup of tea

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I wouldn't wish that on anyone

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By *ittyandtheboyCouple
over a year ago

Behind the bike shed!

Apparently, and two people have said this so it must be true. The fact we cuddle post sex is very appreciated!

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By *_elia DominaTV/TS
over a year ago

Edinburgh (She/Her)

Because I'm a evil bitch and people crave the darkside....

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By *aitonelMan
over a year ago

Liverpool

I'd rather you didn't!

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By *hrek101Man
over a year ago

Herts

Cause I always provide cake

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By *esafinadOHolyNightMan
over a year ago

Belfast

Life fucks me every day. If life is doing it, well, it must be worth a go at least

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By *inister_SpinsterWoman
over a year ago

Manchester(ish).

I'm not worth the effort OP.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I get fucked enough by the taxman on a regular basis

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By *ittlemissFlirtyCouple
over a year ago

Southampton

"Cause I always provide cake"

Cake you say ??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Because you can’t catch it twice

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By *ecretsinnersCouple
over a year ago

Yorkshire

Because I do the best boobie dance which would be sure to laugh you in to bed with me.

Mrs

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By *otsossieMan
over a year ago

Chesterfield

I feel like we all need to see the boobie dance tbh

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By *dmundwilsonMan
over a year ago

Llandudno

Del iawn

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By *ehindHerEyesCouple
over a year ago

SomewhereOnlyWeKnow

Cause I'm an absolute delight....and I'll feed you after

Tinder

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By *apperleymanMan
over a year ago

Nottingham

Cos the holy lord & baby jeebus love porn…

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By *hunky ChefMan
over a year ago

Norwich

"Because I do the best boobie dance which would be sure to laugh you in to bed with me.

Mrs "

Prove it in a video?

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By *hunky ChefMan
over a year ago

Norwich

"Cause I'm an absolute delight....and I'll feed you after

Tinder "

What food?

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By *ehindHerEyesCouple
over a year ago

SomewhereOnlyWeKnow

"Cause I'm an absolute delight....and I'll feed you after

Tinder

What food?

What ever you like

Tinder

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By *hunky ChefMan
over a year ago

Norwich

"Because you can’t catch it twice "

There's is a site called Herpes Dating.

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By *hunky ChefMan
over a year ago

Norwich

"Cause I'm an absolute delight....and I'll feed you after

Tinder

What food?

What ever you like

Tinder "

Lucky husband there.

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By *ixenforfunWoman
over a year ago

banes mask

Em coz my bum and can tell a great yarn

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By *avinaTVTV/TS
over a year ago

Transsexual Transylvania

Why indeed?

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By *eyond PurityCouple
over a year ago

Lincolnshire

You get two for one (if female) and in these times that’s quite a deal

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