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"Are you easily influenced by what they say about that someone and take it as fact or do you like to make up your own mind?" Depends who’s saying it. There are some people I trust to be right. Who I think are worth listening to. | |||
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"Just thinking randomly, which is dangerous I know for 10:19 on a Sunday...And I am curious to hear opinions. When it comes to interactions whether it be Fab or real life do you allow other people's perceptions, judgements and opinions cloud your view of someone else? Are you easily influenced by what they say about that someone and take it as fact or do you like to make up your own mind? " No, never. Although been warned about people I must find it myself, even if ultimately turns out they were right. The exception is what I call is my inner circle 3 people I’ve known decades but they would never speak negatively about anyone anyway , but I would listen to their advice normally | |||
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"Just thinking randomly, which is dangerous I know for 10:19 on a Sunday...And I am curious to hear opinions. When it comes to interactions whether it be Fab or real life do you allow other people's perceptions, judgements and opinions cloud your view of someone else? Are you easily influenced by what they say about that someone and take it as fact or do you like to make up your own mind? " I try and make up my own mind. Someone's interactions with another person? Well it could change depending on their mood, the day. People are fickle things. I try and not let it colour my interactions with someone - I prefer to go with how they are with me. What they show me. What I'll never do, and I think is really shitty, is weaponise gossip to hurt another. Like "oh I've heard that people think x, y and z about you". Off that fucks. | |||
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"I listen to others views and opinions but look to why they hold them. Ultimately I form my own." You would struggle to figure without a psychology degree . To some people fab is their world. Females gaslighting each other etc , it’s just BAU | |||
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"On here I make my own mind up about people. People have their own agendas ……." You are wise…..And sexy | |||
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"I'm sure all the shite that goes on in Telegram groups etc is totally true. Even the PM's that allege people did xyz. There's no reason for anyone to lie behind people's backs." Have you see this for yourself or is that influenced something someone has told you? | |||
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"On here I make my own mind up about people. People have their own agendas on here, some of which might be quite nefarious. Off Fab, I might listen to someone who has experience of someone else, but I use that as guidance only. I also trust my gut instinct." This is so true | |||
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"I listen to others views and opinions but look to why they hold them. Ultimately I form my own. You would struggle to figure without a psychology degree . To some people fab is their world. Females gaslighting each other etc , it’s just BAU " I'm not sure even then we could figure it | |||
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"I'm sure all the shite that goes on in Telegram groups etc is totally true. Even the PM's that allege people did xyz. There's no reason for anyone to lie behind people's backs. Have you see this for yourself or is that influenced something someone has told you?" It was sarcasm. I know for a fact that some people make up shit and lie to make other people look shit. | |||
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"I form my own opinions on here " This | |||
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"Just thinking randomly, which is dangerous I know for 10:19 on a Sunday...And I am curious to hear opinions. When it comes to interactions whether it be Fab or real life do you allow other people's perceptions, judgements and opinions cloud your view of someone else? Are you easily influenced by what they say about that someone and take it as fact or do you like to make up your own mind? I try and make up my own mind. Someone's interactions with another person? Well it could change depending on their mood, the day. People are fickle things. I try and not let it colour my interactions with someone - I prefer to go with how they are with me. What they show me. What I'll never do, and I think is really shitty, is weaponise gossip to hurt another. Like "oh I've heard that people think x, y and z about you". Off that fucks. " But it does happen, makes you wonder why adults can't be adults | |||
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"I'm sure all the shite that goes on in Telegram groups etc is totally true. Even the PM's that allege people did xyz. There's no reason for anyone to lie behind people's backs. Have you see this for yourself or is that influenced something someone has told you?" A mixture of simple logic and deduction, plus backed up by what somebody else has said. | |||
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"Just thinking randomly, which is dangerous I know for 10:19 on a Sunday...And I am curious to hear opinions. When it comes to interactions whether it be Fab or real life do you allow other people's perceptions, judgements and opinions cloud your view of someone else? Are you easily influenced by what they say about that someone and take it as fact or do you like to make up your own mind? " . On Fabs I go with my own judgements as I am on Fabs on my terms.At work I don’t involve myself by what someone thinks of a manager or work colleague it’s how I work and interact with them that counts. | |||
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"I'm sure all the shite that goes on in Telegram groups etc is totally true. Even the PM's that allege people did xyz. There's no reason for anyone to lie behind people's backs. Have you see this for yourself or is that influenced something someone has told you? It was sarcasm. I know for a fact that some people make up shit and lie to make other people look shit. " Why the sarcasm? It's really not necessary. I'm asking a genuine question. | |||
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"I try to make my own mind up but I'm human, I'm sometimes influenced though, I'm human. I very definitely think bad of people who say bad stuff to try and influence me against others" I seem to be somewhat in doubt of my humanity | |||
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"I'm sure all the shite that goes on in Telegram groups etc is totally true. Even the PM's that allege people did xyz. There's no reason for anyone to lie behind people's backs. Have you see this for yourself or is that influenced something someone has told you? A mixture of simple logic and deduction, plus backed up by what somebody else has said." Oh it has to be true then if someone else said it | |||
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"If I had listened to what other people said I would never have gone out with my Husband. I listened but wanted to give him a chance and it worked out to be the best relationship I have ever had. To be fair, when I discovered the reasons for their concern and ill feelings towards him, I realised that his actions were more than justified when I worked out who was involved and why, lol. x" Love that! X | |||
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"I'm sure all the shite that goes on in Telegram groups etc is totally true. Even the PM's that allege people did xyz. There's no reason for anyone to lie behind people's backs. Have you see this for yourself or is that influenced something someone has told you? It was sarcasm. I know for a fact that some people make up shit and lie to make other people look shit. Why the sarcasm? It's really not necessary. I'm asking a genuine question." Sarcasm was general, not at all aimed at you. | |||
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"If I had listened to what other people said I would never have gone out with my Husband. I listened but wanted to give him a chance and it worked out to be the best relationship I have ever had. To be fair, when I discovered the reasons for their concern and ill feelings towards him, I realised that his actions were more than justified when I worked out who was involved and why, lol. x" Did it make you more cautious with him though? | |||
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"I'm sure all the shite that goes on in Telegram groups etc is totally true. Even the PM's that allege people did xyz. There's no reason for anyone to lie behind people's backs. Have you see this for yourself or is that influenced something someone has told you? A mixture of simple logic and deduction, plus backed up by what somebody else has said. Oh it has to be true then if someone else said it " This is what saddens me most about fab. People are often so simple and trusting amongst the most calculated , scheming , manipulative people. | |||
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"I'm sure all the shite that goes on in Telegram groups etc is totally true. Even the PM's that allege people did xyz. There's no reason for anyone to lie behind people's backs. Have you see this for yourself or is that influenced something someone has told you? A mixture of simple logic and deduction, plus backed up by what somebody else has said. Oh it has to be true then if someone else said it " Missing out the simple logic part. What somebody else had said only confirmed what I worked out to be happening, before that person said it to me or I even knew of that person. | |||
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"I try and make up my own mind. Someone's interactions with another person? Well it could change depending on their mood, the day. People are fickle things. I try and not let it colour my interactions with someone - I prefer to go with how they are with me. What they show me. What I'll never do, and I think is really shitty, is weaponise gossip to hurt another. Like "oh I've heard that people think x, y and z about you". Off that fucks. But it does happen, makes you wonder why adults can't be adults " People are human. They get hurt. Lash out. It's a way of trying to bring you down a peg, trying to make you question yourself. We can be often quick to label another's behaviour whilst remaining wilfully ignorant of our own. Which leads nicely on to... Let's stop the armchair psychology. Psychopaths, narcissist, gaslighting. Gaslighting is about the lying. The adamant denial, even when there's evidence. If you make someone constantly question themselves with lies, with telling them something didn't happen when it did and they know it did and they have evidence? Lovebombing, attempted isolation, minimising behaviour etc. Congratulations, you've been gaslighting. All that aside, I'm going to bring up the positive side of listening to others opinions. Because it's Sunday and life is really good. We have a tendency to focus on the negative on this sort of thread but... When a friend sings the praises of another friend, I'm more likely to think, yes, this person could be my cup of tea. If they say about similar senses of humour etc. A good egg. I like good eggs. | |||
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"If people are in the habit of reading forum posts regularly, it doesn't take much to build a picture and form an opinion of some prolific posters. All without anyone else's input or influence " This is very true, instinct says a lot | |||
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"Just follow Tom. He is a role model and influencer " You’re a fluffy little pussy cat in a den of lions Tom | |||
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"If people are in the habit of reading forum posts regularly, it doesn't take much to build a picture and form an opinion of some prolific posters. All without anyone else's input or influence This is very true, instinct says a lot" Instinct or deductive logic? | |||
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"Just follow Tom. He is a role model and influencer " You are a calm in a crazy world Tom, you and your legs | |||
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"Just thinking randomly, which is dangerous I know for 10:19 on a Sunday...And I am curious to hear opinions. When it comes to interactions whether it be Fab or real life do you allow other people's perceptions, judgements and opinions cloud your view of someone else? Are you easily influenced by what they say about that someone and take it as fact or do you like to make up your own mind? " This is an interesting question for sure. I think that we’d all like to say something along the lines of ‘I like to form my own opinions of people and things based on my own experience of them’ etc, but I do think that there is a degree of human nature which can’t help but take on board the advice of others. So for example, in a professional workplace context, if someone who we know, trust and respect advises caution with someone or something then we’re far more likely to take heed. If it’s rumour/backchat/gossip in private life then that’s fundamentally different and I think most people will treat that with the disregard that it deserves. One thing I did notice when I was on Fab a few years ago is that there are times when it could get a big ‘cliquey’; I have no time for that at all. Just my tuppence worth! | |||
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"If people are in the habit of reading forum posts regularly, it doesn't take much to build a picture and form an opinion of some prolific posters. All without anyone else's input or influence " For a smart person that is true who can see behind bullshit and need to be centre of attention . Other people might just think oh they’re very popular | |||
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"I make up my own minds about people, but at the same time I guess I can be swayed a little too. For example being told someone was sending people's private inboxes and face pics from fab into a group chat, instantly put me off that person whereas I previously thought they were okay. I do try and use my own judgement of people and I'm generally not a bad judge of character, it's easier for forum people as you do see a hint at their personality than general fabbers. Mrs " Were you shown proof? Or was it just that you were told? | |||
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"Just thinking randomly, which is dangerous I know for 10:19 on a Sunday...And I am curious to hear opinions. When it comes to interactions whether it be Fab or real life do you allow other people's perceptions, judgements and opinions cloud your view of someone else? Are you easily influenced by what they say about that someone and take it as fact or do you like to make up your own mind? " i imagine my names mud but what you don't know doesn't hurt you | |||
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"I *know* people on fab talk about me behind my back because on more than one occasion it has come back to me. If anyone wants to be influenced by that shit that’s their business. I’m 26. I left secondary school ages ago. " Same, and not sure what's to be gained by it. Like you say it's a playground mentality. | |||
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"I form my own opinions on here " This. And it’s only a matter of time. | |||
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"If I had listened to what other people said I would never have gone out with my Husband. I listened but wanted to give him a chance and it worked out to be the best relationship I have ever had. To be fair, when I discovered the reasons for their concern and ill feelings towards him, I realised that his actions were more than justified when I worked out who was involved and why, lol. x Did it make you more cautious with him though? " Not at all, but then again, I wasn't looking for love, I just wanted to fuck him but the more time we spent together, things developed. As someone else on the thread said, I tend to judge people on how they treat ME. | |||
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"I have found that there are certain people who have an opinion on everyone and put a hell of a lot of effort into convincing others that they should also have their opinion. The above is done in private and those same people then hop on the forums with the polar opposite opinion in public. That tells me all I need to know about them but never influences my opinion on their targets. More often than not I'll go against the grain in my own perception of people. I may not always be right but at least I'm not trying to influence anyone else. An example of this is being told at a social that a particular fabber thinks I'm a dick. The feeling is mutual but my reason for thinking that is down to him using others to get in touch with me and then copying and pasting my replies to them on forum threads. The only reason he thinks I'm a dick is because I ignored his every attempt to include me in his circle. " Interesting isn't it to see how transparent people can be. Hmm interesting replies all, thanks for the contributions | |||
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"I make up my own minds about people, but at the same time I guess I can be swayed a little too. For example being told someone was sending people's private inboxes and face pics from fab into a group chat, instantly put me off that person whereas I previously thought they were okay. I do try and use my own judgement of people and I'm generally not a bad judge of character, it's easier for forum people as you do see a hint at their personality than general fabbers. Mrs Were you shown proof? Or was it just that you were told? " Told by more than one person following a comment about it on a thread, don't get me wrong nothing has changed in my approach to this person because I've seen no proof however numerous people, same story, it's hard to not let it influence/niggle you. It's definitely put me off posting on certain posts. Mrs | |||
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"I make up my own minds about people, but at the same time I guess I can be swayed a little too. For example being told someone was sending people's private inboxes and face pics from fab into a group chat, instantly put me off that person whereas I previously thought they were okay. I do try and use my own judgement of people and I'm generally not a bad judge of character, it's easier for forum people as you do see a hint at their personality than general fabbers. Mrs Were you shown proof? Or was it just that you were told? Told by more than one person following a comment about it on a thread, don't get me wrong nothing has changed in my approach to this person because I've seen no proof however numerous people, same story, it's hard to not let it influence/niggle you. It's definitely put me off posting on certain posts. Mrs " The people in Telegram groups are all trustworthy individuals. | |||
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"I listen. Take it on board. Make up my own mind." • This... ^ and... ... I listen without prejudice to those "perceptions, judgements and opinions" because they are not difficult to ignore, but easy to disregard. | |||
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"Just thinking randomly, which is dangerous I know for 10:19 on a Sunday...And I am curious to hear opinions. When it comes to interactions whether it be Fab or real life do you allow other people's perceptions, judgements and opinions cloud your view of someone else? Are you easily influenced by what they say about that someone and take it as fact or do you like to make up your own mind? " I always make up my own mind plus I never speak to anyone about people on here so It's impossible for me to be influenced | |||
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"Just thinking randomly, which is dangerous I know for 10:19 on a Sunday...And I am curious to hear opinions. When it comes to interactions whether it be Fab or real life do you allow other people's perceptions, judgements and opinions cloud your view of someone else? Are you easily influenced by what they say about that someone and take it as fact or do you like to make up your own mind? I always make up my own mind plus I never speak to anyone about people on here so It's impossible for me to be influenced " Meant to be | |||
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