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"I've got 25 minutes before I have to take the dogs out for a walk... I'm full of cold, need a shower and haven't shaved my legs in 2 weeks. Maybe 3. I promise to do the best impression of a sack of spuds that I can but I'll make you a brew after. So... anyone game? "Yeah. Sounds hot | |||
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"I've got 25 minutes before I have to take the dogs out for a walk... I'm full of cold, need a shower and haven't shaved my legs in 2 weeks. Maybe 3. I promise to do the best impression of a sack of spuds that I can but I'll make you a brew after. So... anyone game?
Yeah. Sounds hot "Oh... it is. Sweaty too  | |||
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"Dam lady! I'm too tired for such sexy talk. " I'd say I'm sorry... but you know I love to turn you on | |||
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"I've got 25 minutes before I have to take the dogs out for a walk... I'm full of cold, need a shower and haven't shaved my legs in 2 weeks. Maybe 3. I promise to do the best impression of a sack of spuds that I can but I'll make you a brew after. So... anyone game?
Yeah. Sounds hot
Oh... it is. Sweaty too "I'll bring a towel  | |||
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"Weymouth " OK... What about Weymouth?  | |||
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"I've got 25 minutes before I have to take the dogs out for a walk... I'm full of cold, need a shower and haven't shaved my legs in 2 weeks. Maybe 3. I promise to do the best impression of a sack of spuds that I can but I'll make you a brew after. So... anyone game? "Yeah, let me just fire up the Lear Jet. Shit! Forgot it’s having its wings waxed! | |||
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"I've got 25 minutes before I have to take the dogs out for a walk... I'm full of cold, need a shower and haven't shaved my legs in 2 weeks. Maybe 3. I promise to do the best impression of a sack of spuds that I can but I'll make you a brew after. So... anyone game?
Yeah. Sounds hot
Oh... it is. Sweaty too
I'll bring a towel "Good call! Clothes peg for the nose too if I were you  | |||
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"I've got 25 minutes before I have to take the dogs out for a walk... I'm full of cold, need a shower and haven't shaved my legs in 2 weeks. Maybe 3. I promise to do the best impression of a sack of spuds that I can but I'll make you a brew after. So... anyone game?
Yeah, let me just fire up the Lear Jet. Shit! Forgot it’s having its wings waxed!"Aww man! Story of my life  | |||
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"Only 21 minutes now " Shhhh... they're sleeping. I may be able to stretch the timing a little | |||
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"I've got 25 minutes before I have to take the dogs out for a walk... I'm full of cold, need a shower and haven't shaved my legs in 2 weeks. Maybe 3. I promise to do the best impression of a sack of spuds that I can but I'll make you a brew after. So... anyone game?
Yeah. Sounds hot
Oh... it is. Sweaty too
I'll bring a towel
Good call! Clothes peg for the nose too if I were you "I'm hard. I can cope  | |||
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"I've got 25 minutes before I have to take the dogs out for a walk... I'm full of cold, need a shower and haven't shaved my legs in 2 weeks. Maybe 3. I promise to do the best impression of a sack of spuds that I can but I'll make you a brew after. So... anyone game? "So that's what FAF means?! When even urban dictionary doesn't know this meaning of the abbreviation, it's hard to figure out. And it seems to be particularly common in the forums for some reason! | |||
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"Only 21 minutes now " I can still do it 25 times then | |||
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"No! " But I got all dressed up in my trackies and coffee stained vest for you | |||
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"I've got 25 minutes before I have to take the dogs out for a walk... I'm full of cold, need a shower and haven't shaved my legs in 2 weeks. Maybe 3. I promise to do the best impression of a sack of spuds that I can but I'll make you a brew after. So... anyone game?
Yeah. Sounds hot
Oh... it is. Sweaty too
I'll bring a towel
Good call! Clothes peg for the nose too if I were you
I'm hard. I can cope "My hero | |||
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"I've got 25 minutes before I have to take the dogs out for a walk... I'm full of cold, need a shower and haven't shaved my legs in 2 weeks. Maybe 3. I promise to do the best impression of a sack of spuds that I can but I'll make you a brew after. So... anyone game?
So that's what FAF means?! When even urban dictionary doesn't know this meaning of the abbreviation, it's hard to figure out. And it seems to be particularly common in the forums for some reason!"Because it gets said so often and the long version is SO many letters | |||
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"Only 21 minutes now I can still do it 25 times then "Oooh... a repeater | |||
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"I'll wait a bit.... with that sexy description, I'll probably only last about 30seconds "I know, right... I'm bringing sexy back | |||
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"Depends. How hairy is yer arsehole? " Dreadlocked baby | |||
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"No! But I got all dressed up in my trackies and coffee stained vest for you "It is all too much to handle, first Lilith with a moustache and now you dressed like that. A man can only get so erect before it breaks. | |||
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"I've got 25 minutes before I have to take the dogs out for a walk... I'm full of cold, need a shower and haven't shaved my legs in 2 weeks. Maybe 3. I promise to do the best impression of a sack of spuds that I can but I'll make you a brew after. So... anyone game? "I am sure that 25 minutes in your company would be entirely entertaining, whatever state you are in. Apart from incapacitated  | |||
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"No! But I got all dressed up in my trackies and coffee stained vest for you
It is all too much to handle, first Lilith with a moustache and now you dressed like that. A man can only get so erect before it breaks. "You are so welcome | |||
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"I've got 25 minutes before I have to take the dogs out for a walk... I'm full of cold, need a shower and haven't shaved my legs in 2 weeks. Maybe 3. I promise to do the best impression of a sack of spuds that I can but I'll make you a brew after. So... anyone game?
I am sure that 25 minutes in your company would be entirely entertaining, whatever state you are in. Apart from incapacitated "I mean... I've got Cards Against Humanity... that could be fun too | |||
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"I've got 25 minutes before I have to take the dogs out for a walk... I'm full of cold, need a shower and haven't shaved my legs in 2 weeks. Maybe 3. I promise to do the best impression of a sack of spuds that I can but I'll make you a brew after. So... anyone game? "Only 3 weeks? I can plait my leg hair
J x | |||
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"I've got 25 minutes before I have to take the dogs out for a walk... I'm full of cold, need a shower and haven't shaved my legs in 2 weeks. Maybe 3. I promise to do the best impression of a sack of spuds that I can but I'll make you a brew after. So... anyone game?
Only 3 weeks? I can plait my leg hair
J x"I'm so jealous... | |||
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"Yes please F" I've put an extension on til 9.30... drive fast | |||
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"Probably. It’s 9:05 after all. "Rude. No extension for you | |||
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"No thanks " Reasonable | |||
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"NSP lay back think of England and enjoy my mediocrity. "See. That's the kind of enthusiasm I'm looking for. | |||
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"Yes please F I've put an extension on til 9.30... drive fast "Looks like I’ll be late, which is unusual because I normally come early | |||
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"Yes please F I've put an extension on til 9.30... drive fast
Looks like I’ll be late, which is unusual because I normally come early "Pffft | |||
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"Am I too late? "13 minutes | |||
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"As long as I can just lay there and not do much "This will be the least energetic sex ever | |||
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"Yes please " Drive fast... | |||
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"I could squeeze you in "That's my line | |||
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"I've got 25 minutes before I have to take the dogs out for a walk... I'm full of cold, need a shower and haven't shaved my legs in 2 weeks. Maybe 3. I promise to do the best impression of a sack of spuds that I can but I'll make you a brew after. So... anyone game? "My kinda woman | |||
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"I've got 25 minutes before I have to take the dogs out for a walk... I'm full of cold, need a shower and haven't shaved my legs in 2 weeks. Maybe 3. I promise to do the best impression of a sack of spuds that I can but I'll make you a brew after. So... anyone game?
My kinda woman "Score! | |||
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"Ok but I'm not sleeping in the damp spot again!!" I'm so sweaty it's all damp spot | |||
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"I've got 25 minutes before I have to take the dogs out for a walk... I'm full of cold, need a shower and haven't shaved my legs in 2 weeks. Maybe 3. I promise to do the best impression of a sack of spuds that I can but I'll make you a brew after. So... anyone game?
My kinda woman
Score! " | |||
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"Yes please F I've put an extension on til 9.30... drive fast "Just scoffing some pork scratchings first F | |||
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"Ok but I'm not sleeping in the damp spot again!! I'm so sweaty it's all damp spot "Same - we can just blame it one each other | |||
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"Yes please F I've put an extension on til 9.30... drive fast
Just scoffing some pork scratchings first
F"#sexymofo | |||
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"Ok but I'm not sleeping in the damp spot again!! I'm so sweaty it's all damp spot
Same - we can just blame it one each other "This is promising... | |||
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"Ok but I'm not sleeping in the damp spot again!! I'm so sweaty it's all damp spot "Ooh be like a water bed then and with my hairy legs and yours, it'd be like velcro so no getting away if you changed your mind. | |||
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"I've got 25 minutes before I have to take the dogs out for a walk... I'm full of cold, need a shower and haven't shaved my legs in 2 weeks. Maybe 3. I promise to do the best impression of a sack of spuds that I can but I'll make you a brew after. So... anyone game? "Oh I love a woman who talks dirty | |||
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"As long as I can just lay there and not do much
This will be the least energetic sex ever "But still sec | |||
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"Ok but I'm not sleeping in the damp spot again!! I'm so sweaty it's all damp spot
Ooh be like a water bed then and with my hairy legs and yours, it'd be like velcro so no getting away if you changed your mind. "The sexy just keeps coming | |||
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"I've got 25 minutes before I have to take the dogs out for a walk... I'm full of cold, need a shower and haven't shaved my legs in 2 weeks. Maybe 3. I promise to do the best impression of a sack of spuds that I can but I'll make you a brew after. So... anyone game?
Oh I love a woman who talks dirty
"You're welcome | |||
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"Ok but I'm not sleeping in the damp spot again!! I'm so sweaty it's all damp spot
Same - we can just blame it one each other
This is promising..."Just get the hairdryer on the sheet and towel down after? | |||
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"As long as I can just lay there and not do much
This will be the least energetic sex ever
But still sec "True story... | |||
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"I've got 25 minutes before I have to take the dogs out for a walk... I'm full of cold, need a shower and haven't shaved my legs in 2 weeks. Maybe 3. I promise to do the best impression of a sack of spuds that I can but I'll make you a brew after. So... anyone game? "Go on then, if we set off now we should be there in about 12 hours so that is plenty of time for you to walk the dogs, have a nap and comb your leg hair | |||
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"Ok but I'm not sleeping in the damp spot again!! I'm so sweaty it's all damp spot
Same - we can just blame it one each other
This is promising...
Just get the hairdryer on the sheet and towel down after?"Ooooh... bake the sweat in. I like it | |||
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"I've got 25 minutes before I have to take the dogs out for a walk... I'm full of cold, need a shower and haven't shaved my legs in 2 weeks. Maybe 3. I promise to do the best impression of a sack of spuds that I can but I'll make you a brew after. So... anyone game?
Go on then, if we set off now we should be there in about 12 hours so that is plenty of time for you to walk the dogs, have a nap and comb your leg hair"For you... I'll style it | |||
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"Absofuckinglutely. But I'm knackered, so please don't expect athletics "Just lie there | |||
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"Absofuckinglutely. But I'm knackered, so please don't expect athletics "How about an adjacent mind fuck? | |||
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"Absofuckinglutely. But I'm knackered, so please don't expect athletics
Just lie there " | |||
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"Yes please F I've put an extension on til 9.30... drive fast
Just scoffing some pork scratchings first
F
#sexymofo"OK, I know I'm a little late but I had some magic stars too. Don't hate me. Sex, now? I can't jiggle around too much though 
F | |||
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"NSP lay back think of England and enjoy my mediocrity.
See. That's the kind of enthusiasm I'm looking for."I’m nothing fancy f I’m not a shit shag. | |||
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"NSP lay back think of England and enjoy my mediocrity.
See. That's the kind of enthusiasm I'm looking for."I’m nothing fancy f I’m not a shit shag. | |||
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"Yes please F I've put an extension on til 9.30... drive fast
Just scoffing some pork scratchings first
F
#sexymofo
OK, I know I'm a little late but I had some magic stars too. Don't hate me. Sex, now? I can't jiggle around too much though
F"Ffs. This is sounding dangerous from a vomit perspective | |||
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"NSP lay back think of England and enjoy my mediocrity.
See. That's the kind of enthusiasm I'm looking for.
I’m nothing fancy f I’m not a shit shag. "Acceptable! | |||
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"I've got 25 minutes before I have to take the dogs out for a walk... I'm full of cold, need a shower and haven't shaved my legs in 2 weeks. Maybe 3. I promise to do the best impression of a sack of spuds that I can but I'll make you a brew after. So... anyone game? " | |||
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"Shit. 35 minutes too late. If there was a twat bus I'd not be on it. I'm such a twat I'd miss it! " You're worth waiting for though | |||
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"I've got 25 minutes before I have to take the dogs out for a walk... I'm full of cold, need a shower and haven't shaved my legs in 2 weeks. Maybe 3. I promise to do the best impression of a sack of spuds that I can but I'll make you a brew after. So... anyone game?
"Is that a yes? | |||
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"Assume the position "Fine. But you'll do all the work, right? | |||
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"I'm a bit late to the party, but I haven't showered for a few days, and probably still smell of last weeks cum...any chance? "Leave it a few more days and you will be able to pull it out in one solidified lump! | |||
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"I've got 25 minutes before I have to take the dogs out for a walk... I'm full of cold, need a shower and haven't shaved my legs in 2 weeks. Maybe 3. I promise to do the best impression of a sack of spuds that I can but I'll make you a brew after. So... anyone game? "Is it 2 or 3 weeks because that's a deal breaker for me tbh. If its 2 then no if its 3 then yes | |||
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"Assume the position
Fine. But you'll do all the work, right? "I graft | |||
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"I'm a bit late to the party, but I haven't showered for a few days, and probably still smell of last weeks cum...any chance?
Leave it a few more days and you will be able to pull it out in one solidified lump! "Jesus  | |||
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"I'm a bit late to the party, but I haven't showered for a few days, and probably still smell of last weeks cum...any chance? "Sounds heavenly…. | |||
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"Sorry I’m washing my hair "I should maybe do that at some point... | |||
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"I'm a bit late to the party, but I haven't showered for a few days, and probably still smell of last weeks cum...any chance?
Leave it a few more days and you will be able to pull it out in one solidified lump!
Jesus "I highly doubt it was him | |||
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"I'm in but only because you Fab'ed my pic earlyer.. xx " It's a good pic | |||
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"I'm a bit late to the party, but I haven't showered for a few days, and probably still smell of last weeks cum...any chance? "Fuck yeah Let's do it | |||
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"I'm a bit late to the party, but I haven't showered for a few days, and probably still smell of last weeks cum...any chance?
Leave it a few more days and you will be able to pull it out in one solidified lump!
Jesus
I highly doubt it was him "Well he was a virgin wasn’t he | |||
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"I'm a shit shag. Shagging doesn't happen often. I've been told that I can just lie there with my legs open and the guy thrusts his wanger in me a few times? "You learnt from the same place as me! | |||
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"I've got 25 minutes before I have to take the dogs out for a walk... I'm full of cold, need a shower and haven't shaved my legs in 2 weeks. Maybe 3. I promise to do the best impression of a sack of spuds that I can but I'll make you a brew after. So... anyone game?
Is it 2 or 3 weeks because that's a deal breaker for me tbh.
If its 2 then no if its 3 then yes "It's definitely 3 | |||
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"Yes. I do, dont we all "I think some don't... | |||
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"I'm quite d*unk, could probably get a semi going and see if I can tuck it in yer vag. If I fall asleep while on top just roll me off." Now we're talking | |||
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"Assume the position
Fine. But you'll do all the work, right?
I graft "I'm counting on it | |||
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"I'm a bit late to the party, but I haven't showered for a few days, and probably still smell of last weeks cum...any chance?
Leave it a few more days and you will be able to pull it out in one solidified lump!
Jesus
I highly doubt it was him
Well he was a virgin wasn’t he "That was Mary | |||
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"I’d love to get some sexual attention "Same. Same. | |||
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"I've got 25 minutes before I have to take the dogs out for a walk... I'm full of cold, need a shower and haven't shaved my legs in 2 weeks. Maybe 3. I promise to do the best impression of a sack of spuds that I can but I'll make you a brew after. So... anyone game? "Best offer I've had in ages! | |||
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"I'm a bit late to the party, but I haven't showered for a few days, and probably still smell of last weeks cum...any chance?
Leave it a few more days and you will be able to pull it out in one solidified lump!
Jesus
I highly doubt it was him
Well he was a virgin wasn’t he
That was Mary "Oh I thought Jesus was too? | |||
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"I've got 25 minutes before I have to take the dogs out for a walk... I'm full of cold, need a shower and haven't shaved my legs in 2 weeks. Maybe 3. I promise to do the best impression of a sack of spuds that I can but I'll make you a brew after. So... anyone game?
Best offer I've had in ages! "I'm a smooth talker | |||
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"Fine... roll and lift your leg a little." You spoil me Lib | |||
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"Depends. Have you got somewhere safe for me to put my wig and false teeth while I give you the best 27 seconds of your life? " The dogs will look after them | |||
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"I'm a bit late to the party, but I haven't showered for a few days, and probably still smell of last weeks cum...any chance?
Leave it a few more days and you will be able to pull it out in one solidified lump! " | |||
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"Depends. Have you got somewhere safe for me to put my wig and false teeth while I give you the best 27 seconds of your life? " I think we can do it in 25 to be fair. | |||
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"Depends. Have you got somewhere safe for me to put my wig and false teeth while I give you the best 27 seconds of your life? I think we can do it in 25 to be fair. " I'll set the stop watch. Now strip and let's see how quickly I can get you to heaven and back | |||
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"Fine... roll and lift your leg a little. You spoil me Lib "You won't feel a thing. | |||
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"Fine... roll and lift your leg a little. You spoil me Lib
You won't feel a thing."That's because I have a fanny like a wizard's sleeve | |||
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"I'm quite d*unk, could probably get a semi going and see if I can tuck it in yer vag. If I fall asleep while on top just roll me off. Now we're talking "best not to spoil things by talking. Dick has gone a bit limp, just gonna rub it around the general area of your fanny in the hope something happens. | |||
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"I'm quite d*unk, could probably get a semi going and see if I can tuck it in yer vag. If I fall asleep while on top just roll me off. Now we're talking
best not to spoil things by talking.
Dick has gone a bit limp, just gonna rub it around the general area of your fanny in the hope something happens."Should we fuck??? | |||
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"Fine... roll and lift your leg a little. You spoil me Lib
You won't feel a thing.
That's because I have a fanny like a wizard's sleeve"Oh, ok... *hides chloroform* Guess we'll actually just fuck? | |||
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"I've got 25 minutes before I have to take the dogs out for a walk... I'm full of cold, need a shower and haven't shaved my legs in 2 weeks. Maybe 3. I promise to do the best impression of a sack of spuds that I can but I'll make you a brew after. So... anyone game? "Of course! | |||
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"I'm quite d*unk, could probably get a semi going and see if I can tuck it in yer vag. If I fall asleep while on top just roll me off. Now we're talking
best not to spoil things by talking.
Dick has gone a bit limp, just gonna rub it around the general area of your fanny in the hope something happens."Reasonable | |||
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"Fine... roll and lift your leg a little. You spoil me Lib
You won't feel a thing.
That's because I have a fanny like a wizard's sleeve
Oh, ok...
*hides chloroform*
Guess we'll actually just fuck?"Woo hoo! Let's do it | |||
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"I've got 25 minutes before I have to take the dogs out for a walk... I'm full of cold, need a shower and haven't shaved my legs in 2 weeks. Maybe 3. I promise to do the best impression of a sack of spuds that I can but I'll make you a brew after. So... anyone game?
Of course! "I make it sound so appealing | |||
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"Mmm yes, I'm falling in love " It's a risk | |||
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"Still waiting to fuck o "It's pesky, innit | |||
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"Right now I fancy karaoke to be honest" I'm sure somewhere in that there London you can do karaoke | |||
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"I've got 25 minutes before I have to take the dogs out for a walk... I'm full of cold, need a shower and haven't shaved my legs in 2 weeks. Maybe 3. I promise to do the best impression of a sack of spuds that I can but I'll make you a brew after. So... anyone game?
Of course! ,, lets walk the dogs together ,
I make it sound so appealing " | |||
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"Right now I fancy karaoke to be honest I'm sure somewhere in that there London you can do karaoke " I cannot think of anything sadder than doing karaoke solo  | |||
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"I've got 25 minutes before I have to take the dogs out for a walk... I'm full of cold, need a shower and haven't shaved my legs in 2 weeks. Maybe 3. I promise to do the best impression of a sack of spuds that I can but I'll make you a brew after. So... anyone game?
Of course! ,, lets walk the dogs together ,
I make it sound so appealing "The little sods have collapsed. They did a mile and they can't handle it | |||
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"Right now I fancy karaoke to be honest I'm sure somewhere in that there London you can do karaoke I cannot think of anything sadder than doing karaoke solo "I'm pretty sure if you use your imagination you could | |||
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"Right now I fancy karaoke to be honest I'm sure somewhere in that there London you can do karaoke I cannot think of anything sadder than doing karaoke solo
I'm pretty sure if you use your imagination you could "I also imagine ffms but it doesn't mean its happening posh x | |||
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"Right now I fancy karaoke to be honest I'm sure somewhere in that there London you can do karaoke I cannot think of anything sadder than doing karaoke solo
I'm pretty sure if you use your imagination you could
I also imagine ffms but it doesn't mean its happening posh x"True story dear | |||
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"I'd love one right now but cba... can I just stick it in and someone push pack?" That does sound like effort... | |||
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"I'd love one right now but cba... can I just stick it in and someone push pack? That does sound like effort..." Agonising. I just want to have sex without the effort but all the glory. | |||
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