FabSwingers.com forum: Abusive messages.

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

So it appears I've been sending abusive messages to somebody as they've reported me to admin for it. I'm guessing admin don't check up on any messages sent and just take the other person's word for it as I've never sent a message like that on here in my life.

I'm suspecting it's somebody I've said no to.

However, admission message to me doesn't allow me to reply to them to find out who's vindictive.

Surely that can't be right and isn't the way to do things.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

First rule of fab… don’t criticise the mods.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Men are so salty

(Assuming it was a male!)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"First rule of fab… don’t criticise the mods."

I've not criticised anybody. I've asked a question.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"First rule of fab… don’t criticise the mods."

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By *isaB45Woman
over a year ago

Fabville

"So it appears I've been sending abusive messages to somebody as they've reported me to admin for it. I'm guessing admin don't check up on any messages sent and just take the other person's word for it as I've never sent a message like that on here in my life.

I'm suspecting it's somebody I've said no to.

However, admission message to me doesn't allow me to reply to them to find out who's vindictive.

Surely that can't be right and isn't the way to do things. "

OP.. you may not consider your messages to have been abusive, but the recipient may have.

Unfortunately, complaining about it in the forums won't help your case.

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By *aucasian GhandiMan
over a year ago

from my dad's left nut (Warwick)

I'm suspecting it's somebody I've said no to.

However, admission message to me doesn't allow me to reply to them to find out who's vindictive.

Surely that can't be right and isn't the way to do things. "

Thats fab life......have admin stopped you from messaging others, if not then don't sweat it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"First rule of fab… don’t criticise the mods.

I've not criticised anybody. I've asked a question. "

True but questioning the mods is the same thing. They give out bans like Usher gives out herpes.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You may rick more bans by taking about it in the forum as you are not met to talk about bans. X

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"You may rick more bans by taking about it in the forum as you are not met to talk about bans. X"

I've not been banned from anything. I'm just asking if ppl being vindictive and lying like that is normal on here.

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By *eliusMan
over a year ago

Henlow

YouTube and Facebook operate the same ‘react without investigation’ policies. It’s nonsense and panders to the action without consequences mindset.

At the very least the ‘abusive’ content should be relayed back to the ‘accused’ .. how else will they know what it is they have said and how to modify future responses, if indeed they feel they need to.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

First rule off the bad step don’t talk about the bad step

It just results in more time on the bad step

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You may rick more bans by taking about it in the forum as you are not met to talk about bans. X

I've not been banned from anything. I'm just asking if ppl being vindictive and lying like that is normal on here."

Yes that’s pretty normal on here. People react very strangely when being rejected no matter how polite you might be. Unfortunately the best way to avoid this is to ignore the people that you wouldn’t want to meet.

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By *oggoneMan
over a year ago

Derry

"You may rick more bans by taking about it in the forum as you are not met to talk about bans. X

I've not been banned from anything. I'm just asking if ppl being vindictive and lying like that is normal on here."

People will do what they can get away with. That's not everyone but fab is made up of the good bad and well.....

All I can suggest is you try not to take it personally.

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By *imply_SensualMan
over a year ago

Widnes

"You may rick more bans by taking about it in the forum as you are not met to talk about bans. X

I've not been banned from anything. I'm just asking if ppl being vindictive and lying like that is normal on here."

Unfortunately it’s very normal, some people don’t like rejection at all and there is a sense of entitlement for some people which compounds their lack of ability to accept rejection.

Another good example we read about a lot is the follow up message “I didn’t want to meet you anyway because…” which could followed by something along the lines of telling you how unattractive, overweight etc. you get the picture.

The positive in all of this is that you know now know you made a good choice in rejecting whoever it was

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By *oggoneMan
over a year ago

Derry

"First rule off the bad step don’t talk about the bad step

It just results in more time on the bad step"

A bit like talking about the clique.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"First rule off the bad step don’t talk about the bad step

It just results in more time on the bad step

A bit like talking about the clique."

Didn’t know they existed

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By *ealitybitesMan
over a year ago

Belfast

If you've been blocked from messaging it may have nothing to do with the recipient.

There are certain words that are against site rules and they trigger an automatic message ban which lifts in a few hours.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

Admin check every report before issuing a warning. If you feel your warning was incorrect contact them from the following

https://www.fabswingers.com/contact-us

Anybody else who has comments about mods or admin should do this too from the relevant link rather than publicly criticise, which is against forum rules.

My next post will show how admin deal with reports

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

Here is an explanation from Admin from another thread on how they deal with reports.

******Just a quick note. If people report others and we can verify that they have broken site rules, we always take action (either a first and final warning, partially suspended account, fully suspended, mixture of the above).

Every single report sent via the REPORT link is reviewed. Clearly it's not in our interests to have people on here who are bad for the site. Equally we need to verify what has been reported and be fair to those who have been reported.

Admin

PS. we never provide feedback on what has happened. It's just not practical given that we get 100s of reports a day.

Here is what the page says after a report has been submitted:

Your feedback has been saved.

A website admin will shortly review your feedback and take the necessary action. After reviewing the evidence available to us, we may disable an account, remove a user, disable certain aspects of that user's account or issue a warning.

By leaving feedback you help improve the site for everyone who uses it. Thank you.******

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