FabSwingers.com forum: Surprise swingers club

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Me and the girlfriend are going to Blackpool at the end of the month, our hotel is near the North pier. I fact its just round the corner from infusion swingers club. I'm tempted to see if she will go in with me, will walk passed it on the way back to our hotel. Is this a good idea??

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By *iddlesticksMan
over a year ago

My nan’s spare room.

"Me and the girlfriend are going to Blackpool at the end of the month, our hotel is near the North pier. I fact its just round the corner from infusion swingers club. I'm tempted to see if she will go in with me, will walk passed it on the way back to our hotel. Is this a good idea?? "

What if you end up in the other direction and you don’t walk past it?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

What if you end up in the other direction and you don’t walk past it? "

I know where to walk lol

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By *ycanNightsMan
over a year ago

Workington

No...talk to her in advance...and get your name on the guest list.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Why don't you show her your profile on here and club reviews, then mention how close one is to your hotel.

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By *ulieAndBeefCouple
over a year ago

Manchester-ish

God no. It took so much mental prep for me to step into a club. A 'surprise' would've ended in divorce. And even if I was so inclined, the thought of doing it without having had the chance to wear the right clothes and make everywhere smooth is awful.

I'd show her your fab profile and take it from there

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By *londebiguyMan
over a year ago

Southport

It's not really on a great street or very much a very easily accessed street id say.

You might look a bit dodgy trying to steer her tgaf way.

Id say that these things need to be discussed and agreed to by both of you.

Give her that respect.

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By *amantha_JadeWoman
over a year ago

Newcastle

Does your gf know about your profile on here or your interest in swinging or that you want to go to a club?

I definitely wouldn’t spring the idea on on her whilst you are away, if you haven’t spoke about it previously. Most people would want time to prepare (mentally and practically - outfit etc)

Not giving her some advance notice would probably be the quickest way to ruin the weekend

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By *ull English with teaMan
over a year ago

London

I’d take her on the Pepsi Max Big One first…

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Bored husband with GF who does\doesn't know your on FAB?

Can't imagine why she would say no to visiting a club on a let minute decision!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

She could be swayed when d*unk, she is up for a lot of things when intoxicated, this weekend away is to spark our relationship up. But probably a good idea to stay away

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Talk us through how you would prepare her for the evening, to increase your chances of a yes?

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By *ulieAndBeefCouple
over a year ago

Manchester-ish

"She could be swayed when d*unk, she is up for a lot of things when intoxicated, this weekend away is to spark our relationship up. But probably a good idea to stay away "

Ah inebriated consent means fuck all. I am so out of this conversation now.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Didn't think this trough did I,,,, never mind. Thanks for your help and in put.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"She could be swayed when d*unk, she is up for a lot of things when intoxicated, this weekend away is to spark our relationship up. But probably a good idea to stay away "

Yeah, I’m sure you can do better than rely on her being off her face. Why don’t you just ask her or tell her you want to sleep with other women?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I could bring it up in conversation whilst we are drinking, she may take it a bit better that I'd like a female to join us, she Is bi after all

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

Why would she need alcohol for the conversation?

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By *eroLondonMan
over a year ago

Covent Garden

"Why would she need alcohol for the conversation?"

•

They serve milkshakes in some bars.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I could bring it up in conversation whilst we are drinking, she may take it a bit better that I'd like a female to join us, she Is bi after all "

Why is she not on the FAB profile with you? Does she know about these conversations?

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By *amantha_JadeWoman
over a year ago

Newcastle

No, sorry I think it’s a terrible idea. At the very least, mention it well before you are due to go away and you could show her some info on the club and say ‘might you fancy popping in there for a drink’ to test the water. But suggesting it to her on the night (especially if she’s dr*nk) is a 100% no, in my opinion.

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By *ycanNightsMan
over a year ago

Workington

"She could be swayed when d*unk, she is up for a lot of things when intoxicated, this weekend away is to spark our relationship up. But probably a good idea to stay away "

This is compounding bad ideas with even worse ideas...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

OP. If intoxication is involved, then legally, consent can be taken as not given. Problems as follows:

1. It is morally indefensible to expect a decision of this magnitude to be made if not sober.

2. If she is intoxicated, goes through with it and you play with others in the club, you expose those others to the risk of prosecution if in the morning your partner realises she never wanted to fo it and only consented because in drink.

3. The same as above but for you.

Additionally from a logistical point if view, how do you expect to convincingly 'accidentslly' realise you have stumbled across a swingers club?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You might want to think about membership as well. What if she says yes, after chatting about it beforehand, but then you get there and you can’t get in?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Why would she need alcohol for the conversation?

•

They serve milkshakes in some bars."

AHH fond memories of a Mississippi mudslide

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Avant Garde is a swingers hotel. Give that a whirl

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It took me years to build up the courage to go in a club and it was my idea lol so I’d start talking about it now and fingers crossed you might make it by Xmas

But either way, defo tell her you want to sleep with other women. I’d want to know if my partner felt that way and I’d respect him for telling me.

Good luck.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Bad idea.

Have an honest conversation with her before you go, tell her your thoughts, wants/needs and feelings and ask her about hers.

Honesty is key in your relationship.

Then take it from there.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Ok thanks, sorry if I seemed a prick but just thought a swingers club could be the thing. I may still talk to her about it before we go to Blackpool see her reaction

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"Ok thanks, sorry if I seemed a prick but just thought a swingers club could be the thing. I may still talk to her about it before we go to Blackpool see her reaction "

Sometimes things seem like a really good idea until you start to think about them

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

And I obviously didn't think it through throughly

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By *avinaTVTV/TS
over a year ago

Transsexual Transylvania

You need to make some gentle enquiries to find out her attitude to swinging before you even broach the subject. She may be offended if you even ask out straight. If you discuss it in general terms , and she reacts positively to the idea, then you can start asking about whether she might like to swing with others.

If you try to take her to a swingers club with zero warning, you'd better make sure you have a decent pre-nup first, and a sleeping bag in the car.

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By *r_PinkMan
over a year ago

london stratford

I would say it is entirely up to you, You know your gf better then any of us.

Without knowing your gf. I say no harm in asking, but if she says no, leave it at that.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don’t think a surprise is good in this scenario! Going to a club for the first time is scary and if T had sprung it on me like that, I’d probably have panicked and never revisited the idea!

Talk about it and see what she wants

Mrs

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By *ustBoWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere in Co. Down

"I could bring it up in conversation whilst we are drinking, she may take it a bit better that I'd like a female to join us, she Is bi after all "

If you cannot talk to her when she is sober then why would you would even think it's okay to do it when she is drinking. That's such an immature way to think about doing it. It's borderline coercive behaviour to try and get someone to do something you want but you know she won't be interested in so you looking for a way around it.

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By *ris GrayMan
over a year ago

Dorchester

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I could bring it up in conversation whilst we are drinking, she may take it a bit better that I'd like a female to join us, she Is bi after all

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By *rder66Man
over a year ago

Tatooine

Could you film her reaction when you take her and tell her you're on a swingers site.

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By *rder66Man
over a year ago

Tatooine

And when she sees your profile name.

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By *rofessor ElementalMan
over a year ago

Durham

Would the girlfriend be the same person as the wife or is she a different woman. Either way have a conversation with her.

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By *lik and PaulCouple
over a year ago

Flagrante

"She could be swayed when d*unk, she is up for a lot of things when intoxicated, this weekend away is to spark our relationship up. But probably a good idea to stay away "

I'm not going to repeat what others have said as it's all good advice but on this point, swinging is a lifestyle for strong, connected couples, not a way of "sparking up a relationship ". If your relationship is flaky in any way then swinging will probably kill it stone dead.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"She could be swayed when d*unk, she is up for a lot of things when intoxicated, this weekend away is to spark our relationship up. But probably a good idea to stay away

Ah inebriated consent means fuck all. I am so out of this conversation now.

Oh sweet jesus. OP, if you cant see what's wrong with your above commemt, then thats worrying.

Yep, im out too.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"She could be swayed when d*unk, she is up for a lot of things when intoxicated, this weekend away is to spark our relationship up. But probably a good idea to stay away "

It's this kinda thing that just gives me all the feels....

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By *enrietteandSamCouple
over a year ago

Staffordshire

"She could be swayed when d*unk, she is up for a lot of things when intoxicated, this weekend away is to spark our relationship up. But probably a good idea to stay away

It's this kinda thing that just gives me all the feels...."

You’ll do anything for free wine!

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By *espectfulGuy1Man
over a year ago

Northwich

You’re taking your GF to blackpool to spark up your relationship and thinking of getting her d*unk then springing a swingers club on her without warning as you walk past and she probably doesn’t know you’ve got a profile on here?!?! WTAF you sound a right catch for her wouldn’t surprise me if you’re single when you return from blackpool

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By *hrista BellendWoman
over a year ago

surrounded by twinkly lights

Sometimes fantasy should happily just stay as fantasy, there's no need to make into reality OP. Have a brill time away

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"She could be swayed when d*unk, she is up for a lot of things when intoxicated, this weekend away is to spark our relationship up. But probably a good idea to stay away "

So it's ok when she can't give consent?

Wow legal minefield some

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Mention it before hand. If it comes out of the blue she will be instantly suspicious. Then she will think about it for a few days and become mega suspicious.

Mrs C

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"And I obviously didn't think it through throughly "

It would seem not

In life I find you can get into a way of thinking where there seems only one way of achieving an outcome or even only one possible outcome to achieve. That's where a difficult conversation can often bring unexpected results.

Enjoy your weekend in Blackpool, you might find some time away from home together enables the two of you to have a good talk

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

So, so many issues with this; disrespect, deceit, coercion, dishonesty, manipulation…

Looks like most of it has been covered

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By *UFSWoman
over a year ago

belfast

You want to walk her past a swingers club,hoping she will say let's try it?

You would have a better chance walking her past a shoe shop and suggesting you both pop in

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By *ootnootboopCouple
over a year ago

Cheshire

"She could be swayed when d*unk, she is up for a lot of things when intoxicated, this weekend away is to spark our relationship up. But probably a good idea to stay away "

This sounds like an absolute trainwreck of an idea to be honest!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I thought this thread was going to be about some kind of mystery tour that ended up in a swingers club... how wrong could I be.

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