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Nice guys come last.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Thought I’d split the room with this topic title!

I was with a group of guys this week and this was quoted, and we all unanimously agreed this is ‘somewhat’ true.

What does the fab forum think?

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By *ellinever70Woman
over a year ago

Ayrshire

I think it's a handy lie the not so nice guys fool themselves with

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's only polite to let the lady come first..

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod

over a year ago

East Sussex

Nice guys will find out what the person they're with prefers and together they can find a mutual agreement. I'm a once is enough kind of woman I prefer a guy, nice or not to come first or at a similar time of his a choosing.

There! Non committal enough

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod

over a year ago

East Sussex


"I think it's a handy lie the not so nice guys fool themselves with "

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By *ohn KanakaMan
over a year ago

Not all that North of North London

I think it's at best self pitying and at worst complete rubbish.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hmm the phrase 'nice guys' is very negative in my mind - it conjures up an image of a bloke moaning about not having something delivered on a plate that they are 'entitled' to have, despite making zero effort or work... Just because they are 'nice'..

I say get off your arse, be less entitled and actively work for what you want

We never get 100% what we want.. That's just life.. Nothing to do with being nice or not

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's largely nonsense

OK, some women like 'bad boys'

Most don't

IMHO it's a term guys use when they get blown out to ease their ego

She didn't fancy you

Or

She didn't feel the feels

It's more likely to be one of those rather than because you were 'nice'

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By *amieLDN22Man
over a year ago

London

It appears that way now but they do win big eventually. The Tortoise and the Hare situation.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There's nice, then there's boring woe is me nice. I don't like the second kind of nice.

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By *TG3Man
over a year ago

Dorchester


"Thought I’d split the room with this topic title!

I was with a group of guys this week and this was quoted, and we all unanimously agreed this is ‘somewhat’ true.

What does the fab forum think? "

Nope i disagree especially in forums if you're nice you will go further, so many times I've read in forum threads where the woman has picked the guy based on his mean looks and its ended badly because he had a mean attitude to, be nice and you'll get nice back

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod

over a year ago

East Sussex

See, I read this as 'cum last' I'm off my game this morning.

Don't describe yourself as a 'nice guy' if you think it entitles you to sex. Use it only if you rescue kittens from the jaws of lions.

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By *reyToTheFairiesWoman
over a year ago

Carlisle usually

People who have to proclaim themselves as nice tend to come last.

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By *aitonelMan
over a year ago

Travelling

It certainly has a truth to it but oh so many factors.

Define nice and define what is "not nice but still attractive"

Nice guy is often viewed as being the same as a voiceless push over. Unwilling to take a chance and stand out from being anything other than nice. While the "bad boy" will make themselves seen and heard.

Nice guys can also been seen as disingenuous too.

While both of those traits exist, they are don't have to be core traits either.

Plenty of "nice guys" get good things,and good relationships.

For the most part the "bad boy" is no more than a teenage fantasy brought on hormones and the desire to rebel against things. And it will always stay as a fantasy but often fades to reality that a "bad boy" is impractical.

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By *hrista BellendWoman
over a year ago

surrounded by twinkly lights

Nope. The nice guys that people find attractive come first.

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By *istyPeaksCouple
over a year ago

braintree

I think essentially it’s just a silly phrase, a soundbite…

BUT

There is a little truth that sometimes if you’re nice (and this is using nice guys to apply to women too I suppose) then there can be a tendency to get used and taken for granted by the less nice. So be nice , but be firm.

Also

There are some “nice” guys who use the phrase as a whinge. But they actually aren’t nice guys, they are entitled spoiled brats.

I prefer it to just be a harmless phrase, because it’s a lazy Saturday and my brain hurts

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By *oubletroubleCouple
over a year ago

South West

There is a very interesting take on this by Jordan Peterson and ultimately most women look for a man who is capable of chasing the monsters away in real life.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"See, I read this as 'cum last' I'm off my game this morning.

Don't describe yourself as a 'nice guy' if you think it entitles you to sex. Use it only if you rescue kittens from the jaws of lions."

I had to go back and reread the title and OP - i thought I'd got the wrong end of the stick

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Self-proclaimed 'nice' guys are anything but. There's another reason why these types come last

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"People who have to proclaim themselves as nice tend to come last."

You see, we were talking about people we thought were nice guys and you see the way people have taken the piss out of them.

Work places have over looked them for promotion for the asshole in the office. Or the way they get fucked over by a lover (man or woman)

Normaly if say those that are ruthless and not so nice succeed with what they want.

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By *elix SightedMan
over a year ago

Cloud 8


"Thought I’d split the room with this topic title!

I was with a group of guys this week and this was quoted, and we all unanimously agreed this is ‘somewhat’ true.

What does the fab forum think? "

I think this is about context and interpretation.

I agree insofar as I am a pretty quiet, reserved, polite chap. I’m not someone who is full of arrogance, narcissism and empty promises. I often find other men are favoured because they (figuratively) thrust themselves on women with peacocking, in which I refuse to engage (not least because I don’t have the credentials to back it up).

I would far rather have someone appreciate me for me, but that does mean I miss out on women I really fancy.

I know folk will say “in that case they’re not right for you”, but it doesn’t hurt any less when you think about them.

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By *ou only live onceMan
over a year ago

London

No, I've never subscribed to this theory.

Nice doesn't have the negative connotation for me that some seem to have. It doesn't mean "pushover" or "weak" in my mind, and the traits I associate with nice are qualities I like to see in someone I am friends (or more) with.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod

over a year ago

East Sussex


"People who have to proclaim themselves as nice tend to come last.

You see, we were talking about people we thought were nice guys and you see the way people have taken the piss out of them.

Work places have over looked them for promotion for the asshole in the office. Or the way they get fucked over by a lover (man or woman)

Normaly if say those that are ruthless and not so nice succeed with what they want.

"

Are these nice guys standing up for themselves at all?

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod

over a year ago

East Sussex


"No, I've never subscribed to this theory.

Nice doesn't have the negative connotation for me that some seem to have. It doesn't mean "pushover" or "weak" in my mind, and the traits I associate with nice are qualities I like to see in someone I am friends (or more) with."

I agree. Nice doesn't mean you lay down and let people walk over you.

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By *rhugesMan
over a year ago

Cardiff

Problem is not so nice guys pretend to be nice guys on here lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"People who have to proclaim themselves as nice tend to come last.

You see, we were talking about people we thought were nice guys and you see the way people have taken the piss out of them.

Work places have over looked them for promotion for the asshole in the office. Or the way they get fucked over by a lover (man or woman)

Normaly if say those that are ruthless and not so nice succeed with what they want.

Are these nice guys standing up for themselves at all?"

Maybe not. But would that make them anything but a nice guy/person?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"No, I've never subscribed to this theory.

Nice doesn't have the negative connotation for me that some seem to have. It doesn't mean "pushover" or "weak" in my mind, and the traits I associate with nice are qualities I like to see in someone I am friends (or more) with."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Nice can embrace all kinds of things. And it often depends on the view of the beholder as to what nice is. I'm polite, respectful, courteous and also fiercely protective of people I care about so does that make me nice?

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By *ittlebirdWoman
over a year ago

The Big Smoke

I actually don’t think they do OP. They are the kind people we find rarely who actually understand others and perhaps put others first.

The wise ones understand that this mustn’t be at the detriment of themselves.

The really really wise ones also realise that sinking to someone else’s level isn’t needed in this life or the next.

Just my tuppence worth

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod

over a year ago

East Sussex


"People who have to proclaim themselves as nice tend to come last.

You see, we were talking about people we thought were nice guys and you see the way people have taken the piss out of them.

Work places have over looked them for promotion for the asshole in the office. Or the way they get fucked over by a lover (man or woman)

Normaly if say those that are ruthless and not so nice succeed with what they want.

Are these nice guys standing up for themselves at all?

Maybe not. But would that make them anything but a nice guy/person? "

No. Being nice doesn't mean you stand back while others take advantage of you. Not to me anyway. Standing your ground, speaking up for yourself and other people is possible while being a nice person.

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By *reyToTheFairiesWoman
over a year ago

Carlisle usually


"Maybe not. But would that make them anything but a nice guy/person? "

It doesn't mean they're not a nice person. But it does mean that their primary trait on display isn't 'Nice,' it's 'Pushover.'

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By *aitonelMan
over a year ago

Travelling


"People who have to proclaim themselves as nice tend to come last.

You see, we were talking about people we thought were nice guys and you see the way people have taken the piss out of them.

Work places have over looked them for promotion for the asshole in the office. Or the way they get fucked over by a lover (man or woman)

Normaly if say those that are ruthless and not so nice succeed with what they want.

"

Yes that too! The ruthlessness and backstabbing is just as, if not more effective than generous in those situations at times.

"Good and Nice guys have too many rules" that hold them back

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Nice can embrace all kinds of things. And it often depends on the view of the beholder as to what nice is. I'm polite, respectful, courteous and also fiercely protective of people I care about so does that make me nice?"

You sound like a nice guy.

But you’re now suspicious, and could be not so nice as per some comments above!

*joke.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"….

"Good and Nice guys have too many rules" that hold them back"

This could be true.

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By *ose-tinted GlassesMan
over a year ago

Glasgow / London

Did you know that the word ‘nice’ originally meant foolish and ignorant? Or that way back in history it also meant wanton? And more recently (but still long ago) it meant accurate and exact?

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod

over a year ago

East Sussex

I like nice people. People who are funny, have a bit of character about them, will tell me when I'm being an idiot, will pick me up from the station if I miss my bus but will tell me to get a damn taxi if they get fed up with doing it. That sort of person not the kind who simpers about agreeing to everything and just watching while other people take advantage without saying anything then act all hurt and pathetic when they get the shitty end of the stick.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod

over a year ago

East Sussex


"Did you know that the word ‘nice’ originally meant foolish and ignorant? Or that way back in history it also meant wanton? And more recently (but still long ago) it meant accurate and exact?

"

It also means a very nice biscuit that hits the spot very nicely with a cup of red bush tea

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I actually don’t think they do OP. They are the kind people we find rarely who actually understand others and perhaps put others first.

The wise ones understand that this mustn’t be at the detriment of themselves.

The really really wise ones also realise that sinking to someone else’s level isn’t needed in this life or the next.

Just my tuppence worth "

Totally agree. That's about half a crown's worth

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By *hrista BellendWoman
over a year ago

surrounded by twinkly lights


"People who have to proclaim themselves as nice tend to come last.

You see, we were talking about people we thought were nice guys and you see the way people have taken the piss out of them.

Work places have over looked them for promotion for the asshole in the office. Or the way they get fucked over by a lover (man or woman)

Normaly if say those that are ruthless and not so nice succeed with what they want.

"

I think you are closer to a wet lettuce description there. Nice guys can be assertive and positive, just because they are kind and thoughtful doesn't mean they are a pushover.

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By *ose-tinted GlassesMan
over a year ago

Glasgow / London


"It also means a very nice biscuit that hits the spot very nicely with a cup of red bush tea "

Heh. You said ‘bush’.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod

over a year ago

East Sussex


"It also means a very nice biscuit that hits the spot very nicely with a cup of red bush tea

Heh. You said ‘bush’. "

I talk dirty like that all the time

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Are we turning the term ‘nice guy’ into someone who we think is a complete pathetic fool that needs slap?

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod

over a year ago

East Sussex


"Are we turning the term ‘nice guy’ into someone who we think is a complete pathetic fool that needs slap? "

I think some complete pathetic fools who need a slap use it to describe themselves.

"I'm a nice guy but women won't have sex with me/I get passed over for promotion/I'm a bit of a loser"

Being 'nice' is not a passport to success one needs to make a bit of effort

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By *ohn KanakaMan
over a year ago

Not all that North of North London


"There is a very interesting take on this by Jordan Peterson and ultimately most women look for a man who is capable of chasing the monsters away in real life.

"

I'm not sure Jordan Peterson is the best source of "what most women want"

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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago

Dubai & Nottingham


"Thought I’d split the room with this topic title!

I was with a group of guys this week and this was quoted, and we all unanimously agreed this is ‘somewhat’ true.

What does the fab forum think? "

What is a nice guy?! If nice guys are those that sit around talking about stuff like that, is it surprising ? It’s possible to be a good man overall and a little bit bad sometimes. Nice is an insult

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't agree, it's a cop out deflecting the reasons why things haven't gone their way. Everyone has a different definition of being 'nice' and it's nothing to do with sexual attraction. I've met some beautiful people that instantly become unattractive when they show rudeness or arrogance. Women like nice, there's nothing wrong with being a nice guy. I wish there was more genuine niceness on here sigh.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod

over a year ago

East Sussex

[Removed by poster at 18/02/23 12:16:08]

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By *erces LetiferMan
over a year ago

Somewhere off the edge of the map... 'ere there be monsters

Okay, so first it's worth a mention that there's a difference between just a guy who is 'nice' in a general sense, and a Nice Guy™.

I think Nice Guys™ should instead focus on being good men, and I mean that in a literal and technical sense - get good at being a man.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"There is a very interesting take on this by Jordan Peterson and ultimately most women look for a man who is capable of chasing the monsters away in real life.

I'm not sure Jordan Peterson is the best source of "what most women want" "

I read his name often on the internet. I still don’t know who he is!

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod

over a year ago

East Sussex


"There is a very interesting take on this by Jordan Peterson and ultimately most women look for a man who is capable of chasing the monsters away in real life.

I'm not sure Jordan Peterson is the best source of "what most women want" "

I'm darn sure he's not, bless his ill fitting suit

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By *IG G77Man
over a year ago

GATLEY

I'm a nice guy it's the only way to be in the current climate

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Thought I’d split the room with this topic title!

I was with a group of guys this week and this was quoted, and we all unanimously agreed this is ‘somewhat’ true.

What does the fab forum think?

What is a nice guy?! If nice guys are those that sit around talking about stuff like that, is it surprising ? It’s possible to be a good man overall and a little bit bad sometimes. Nice is an insult

"

Whooosaa!!! I was one of these guys sat around talking!!!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I'm a nice guy it's the only way to be in the current climate "

It’s cheaper. I know that!!

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By *erces LetiferMan
over a year ago

Somewhere off the edge of the map... 'ere there be monsters


"I'm not sure Jordan Peterson is the best source of "what most women want" "

And why is that? Do you disagree with the example used?

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By *ustBoWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere in Co. Down

I don't believe it is true at all.

I think they are plenty of men who believe in their own heads they are nice guys but who are actually quite the opposite.They tell you how nice they are and how you really should be with them and then throw strops when they don't get what they want. I've seen it so many times on here even guys who have it in the names that they are nice and kind and caring are often far from it.It is used as an excuse as to why people don't fancy them or want to interact with them. Being nice does not entitle you to anything more than anyone else,in fact it should be a basic necessity and not something you think is unique.

Yes there are women who prefer the more outgoing jack the lad types but a hell of a lot more prefer decent men. Men who are actually nice and kind but are willing to speak their minds without insulting others,and share their opinions and not being afraid to say things that go against the grain if that's they feel that way. Men who aren't afraid to be themselves and don't feel the need to put on an act.

And of course there are people who will take advantage of nice people that happens and it's shit and those people are the lowest of the low. And if you have to buy affection then that whole relationship is based on a very shaky foundation that will collapse.

But thinking and using the excuse that nice guys finish last is just an excuse that a lot use to excuse the fact that someone they like doesn't like them back the way. But really would they really want to be with someone who they will never be enough for anyhow. Don't ever be someone that somebody else has just settled for when they thought there wasn't a better option. No one deserves to be second best in a relationship.

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By *ou only live onceMan
over a year ago

London


"Are we turning the term ‘nice guy’ into someone who we think is a complete pathetic fool that needs slap?

I think some complete pathetic fools who need a slap use it to describe themselves.

"I'm a nice guy but women won't have sex with me/I get passed over for promotion/I'm a bit of a loser"

Being 'nice' is not a passport to success one needs to make a bit of effort"

Exactly. Nice is great, almost a prerequisite for me, but not enough if that's all you're relying on for success (in any area).

Are you nice, AND good at your job? Nice, AND confident? Nice, AND interesting/interested. You get my drift...

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By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple
over a year ago

Leeds

Stanley ipkiss had a real problem with this. He still got the girl.

Have a little faith. Either that or foil a crime syndicate where the boss has a hot bird. Could work.

The mr

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Stanley ipkiss had a real problem with this. He still got the girl.

The mr "

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By *erces LetiferMan
over a year ago

Somewhere off the edge of the map... 'ere there be monsters


"Stanley ipkiss had a real problem with this. He still got the girl.

Have a little faith. Either that or foil a crime syndicate where the boss has a hot bird. Could work.

The mr"

This is true. But it's also true that Stanley Ipkiss did a lot of growing and learning along the way... in some ways becoming not-so-Nice.

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By *ucka39Man
over a year ago

Newcastle

I think nice guys continue until the other party has cum rather than just rolling over once they have

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By *hristopherd999Man
over a year ago

Brentwood

Totally agree, being too nice has cost me a lot over the years

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I think nice guys continue until the other party has cum rather than just rolling over once they have "

This is a case of good manners.

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By *eyond PurityCouple
over a year ago

Lincolnshire

I think it’s a self pitying statement for people not getting what they want.

People finish where they deserve to finish based on what effort they’ve made, whether that’s in a race, on FAB or in life.

Some people have an Eeyore outlook on life even if they’ve had good times recently - still make out they are hard done by.

I’m just a guy and depending on my interaction with someone, it’s up to them how they perceive me whether that’s nice or not.

K

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod

over a year ago

East Sussex


"Are we turning the term ‘nice guy’ into someone who we think is a complete pathetic fool that needs slap?

I think some complete pathetic fools who need a slap use it to describe themselves.

"I'm a nice guy but women won't have sex with me/I get passed over for promotion/I'm a bit of a loser"

Being 'nice' is not a passport to success one needs to make a bit of effort

Exactly. Nice is great, almost a prerequisite for me, but not enough if that's all you're relying on for success (in any area).

Are you nice, AND good at your job? Nice, AND confident? Nice, AND interesting/interested. You get my drift..."

We're nice, people describe us as a 'nice couple' hence our used name (that and I'm 561 years old) but we're nobody's fools.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I think it’s a self pitying statement for people not getting what they want.

People finish where they deserve to finish based on what effort they’ve made, whether that’s in a race, on FAB or in life.

"

We should give them stickers for taking part!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"people who don't set boundaries get their needs met last".

Also

Self identifing nice guys are rarely nice.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes we do.

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By *avexxMan
over a year ago

cheshire

nice guys come last,,, i dont think so

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By *ucka39Man
over a year ago

Newcastle

Nice guys don't answer back and nod their head and walk away

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By *ealitybitesMan
over a year ago

Belfast

All depends on your definition of nice and if it's weaponised or not.

I don't agree that nice guys on the forums do better because it's all subjective and some of those lauded as being nice and inclusive are only nice and inclusive to certain individuals.

I've no desire to finish first but I've no concerns about finishing last just because I am able to voice my opinion without being rude or patronising.

I've no need to refer to myself as nice because I allow my words and actions determine how others view me.

Some may think I'm nice while others may think I'm a dick.

I'm ok with either adjective.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I must admit I'm a shit shag,I just cum and roll off(usually a couple of minutes) and get dressed,I can't lie

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If being 'nice' means not being your true self and honouring your own needs then yes probably they do.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My view is that 'nice' guys (as someone been around the internet long enough to understand the trope) are very often actually just men that are more passive and don't hold themselves with confidence and have self doubt.

I've been a couple on here before and receiving a message from a guy where it's like "here's my face picture but I'm ugly and you won't like me " the reality is the person is probably completely fine but what isn't attractive is not having the conviction and confidence in putting yourself out there like that in this situation. Calling yourself ugly and assuming someone won't like you isn't attractive because it's reflective of what they can expect with their time spent with you? If a woman or couple are looking for a specific dynamic and someone with the confidence to play that out and make sure it's to the level they want they're not going to pick the guy who doesn't have the confidence to properly present themselves on here - because it's reflective of behind closed doors you're not going to be playing with 'confidence'.

My experience as the male half of a couple that looked for men, and knowing a lot of single women that have used platforms like this is it's not "bad boys" that women want, it's men with confidence. Not arrogance, but confidence. Typically women aren't looking for a guy to come across super romantic and placcid and trying to 'woo' them in my opinion, or to be self deprecating - at least not on initial contact. Women want men that stand up straight and put their chest out and have the confidence and convinction behind presenting themselves and their interests and thoughts.

At least that's my perception of the male half of a couple previously, as well as speaking to enough single women that have done this to get a shared opinion.

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By *imi_RougeWoman
over a year ago

Portsmouth

It's the same with nice girls... They all want a nice girl, to be able to take home to the parents, but we're often not "exciting enough"

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By *r TriomanMan
over a year ago

Chippenham Malmesbury area

Not if its a Whos the Nicest Guy? competition they don't

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By *imi_RougeWoman
over a year ago

Portsmouth


""people who don't set boundaries get their needs met last".

Also

Self identifing nice guys are rarely nice."

Very well said

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

I think it's a cop out phrase for guys who arnt getting what they wanted.

When I was meeting I only ever met nice guys. These guys don't have to tell they are nice their nice their actions show it.

Nice doesn't mean a wet lettuce that agrees with everything you say or a sycophant

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By *2000ManMan
over a year ago

Worthing

You can be a nice guy but at the same time, don't be a doormat.

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By *ose-tinted GlassesMan
over a year ago

Glasgow / London


"It's the same with nice girls... They all want a nice girl, to be able to take home to the parents, but we're often not "exciting enough" "

There’s a great song about that by Brandy Clark. “If you want the girl next-door, then go next-door …”

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By *ohn KanakaMan
over a year ago

Not all that North of North London


"I'm not sure Jordan Peterson is the best source of "what most women want"

And why is that? Do you disagree with the example used?"

In all honesty I think any man declaring he knows best what women want is almost certainly going to be patriarchal bullshit.

I think when that sane man has multiple accusations of misogyny from multiple sources then it's definitely best to be suspicious.

Of course, I'm all ears of you want to substantiate the original claim?

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By *erces LetiferMan
over a year ago

Somewhere off the edge of the map... 'ere there be monsters


"In all honesty I think any man declaring he knows best what women want is almost certainly going to be patriarchal bullshit."

I confess my ignorance to any such declarations. Do you have any links or sources to any examples of this 'patriarchal bullshit'?


"I think when that sane man has multiple accusations of misogyny from multiple sources then it's definitely best to be suspicious."

Such as...? Again, forgive my ignorance.


"Of course, I'm all ears of you want to substantiate the original claim?"

Oh, I think it's much more the place of the ladies present to either confirm or deny that, don't you? But I've heard from several sources, be it clinical psychology, evolutionary psychology, anthropology, sexology, etc... that all would be supportive of such claims. I'm all ears if you have anything that would suggest otherwise, of course.

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By *inkyInkedBiWoman
over a year ago

.

We all know only Mel Gibson knows what women want

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By *ose-tinted GlassesMan
over a year ago

Glasgow / London

Didn’t he knock that out of himself at the end of the film?

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By *inky_couple2020Couple
over a year ago

North West

I don't agree. I married a "nice guy". My best work mate is a helluva nice guy. My son is a nice guy, as is my brother and my uncle. None of aforementioned are "finishing last" in any measure of that. I think some of the not-so-nice guys are just a tad deluded.

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By *inky_couple2020Couple
over a year ago

North West


"Nope. The nice guys that people find attractive come first."

This!!

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By *cottish guy 555Man
over a year ago

London

Nothing wrong with being polite and nice. Chatting to a lovely lady at a social the other night about how some guys just feel entitled, touch without asking, etc. I commented that some people would feel that after chatting to her for a few minutes they would think it's okay just to grab at her tits. She responded by saying that she was disappointed that I hadn't done that yet

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm a nice guy and unusually but not every time cum first

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's nonsense, the nice guys that are referred to are often mentally unbalanced thinking that they have to cater to every whim of a woman's needs, normal guys, who are mostly nice aswell, don't have any issue, now I may be taking this whole thing up wrong and maybe it's just about cumming

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By *ames-77Man
over a year ago

milton keynes

90% of the time this is true

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"90% of the time this is true "
its not

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By *ames-77Man
over a year ago

milton keynes


"90% of the time this is true its not"

If you say so

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"90% of the time this is true its not

If you say so "

I do...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Thought I’d split the room with this topic title!

I was with a group of guys this week and this was quoted, and we all unanimously agreed this is ‘somewhat’ true.

What does the fab forum think? Nope i disagree especially in forums if you're nice you will go further, so many times I've read in forum threads where the woman has picked the guy based on his mean looks and its ended badly because he had a mean attitude to, be nice and you'll get nice back "

Ummmmmm

Let me digg deeper!!

Il be back.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Thought I’d split the room with this topic title!

I was with a group of guys this week and this was quoted, and we all unanimously agreed this is ‘somewhat’ true.

What does the fab forum think? Nope i disagree especially in forums if you're nice you will go further, so many times I've read in forum threads where the woman has picked the guy based on his mean looks and its ended badly because he had a mean attitude to, be nice and you'll get nice back

Ummmmmm

Let me digg deeper!!

Il be back. "

Sly stallone, Bruce Willis and arnie were interviewed for a movie bout musical legends, sly said I'll be mozart, Bruce said I'll be beethoven, Annie said fuck off I'm not saying it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"It certainly has a truth to it but oh so many factors.

Define nice and define what is "not nice but still attractive"

Nice guy is often viewed as being the same as a voiceless push over. Unwilling to take a chance and stand out from being anything other than nice. While the "bad boy" will make themselves seen and heard.

Nice guys can also been seen as disingenuous too.

While both of those traits exist, they are don't have to be core traits either.

Plenty of "nice guys" get good things,and good relationships.

For the most part the "bad boy" is no more than a teenage fantasy brought on hormones and the desire to rebel against things. And it will always stay as a fantasy but often fades to reality that a "bad boy" is impractical. "

Nice share.

A lot deeper than we most think and know.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Nope. The nice guys that people find attractive come first."

Attraction!!' Now we are getting to some tyre and tarmaç!

What some women, lets say find some men attractive thè game changes somewhat!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"There's nice, then there's boring woe is me nice. I don't like the second kind of nice.

"

Does anybody like the boreing nice, lets be honest! Lay there think og " England type " lol

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By *aptain Caveman41Man
over a year ago

Home

Nice guys are put in the friendzone listing to the friend complaining that there are no nice guys out there

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"There is a very interesting take on this by Jordan Peterson and ultimately most women look for a man who is capable of chasing the monsters away in real life.

"

Food for thought! Alot deeper than peterson dug!!

Hint!! If something is available too often?? Like any toy to a child,they mostly lose interest. Onto the next shiney one.

More deeper than that tooo.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Nice guys are put in the friendzone listing to the friend complaining that there are no nice guys out there "

Man out of me own very heart hère.

Shame you are far away

Id offer you a drink or two.

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By *ames-77Man
over a year ago

milton keynes


"90% of the time this is true its not

If you say so

I do..."

In that case in your opinion they don't come last .. Other peoples opinion they do

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"90% of the time this is true its not

If you say so

I do...

In that case in your opinion they don't come last .. Other peoples opinion they do "

Who's opinion?? The 'nice guys' let's be realistic here

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By *aribbean King 1985Man
over a year ago

South West London

Most women claim they want a nice guy but when they get one they quick to get rid of him or find a reason to get rid of him

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Thought I’d split the room with this topic title!

I was with a group of guys this week and this was quoted, and we all unanimously agreed this is ‘somewhat’ true.

What does the fab forum think? Nope i disagree especially in forums if you're nice you will go further, so many times I've read in forum threads where the woman has picked the guy based on his mean looks and its ended badly because he had a mean attitude to, be nice and you'll get nice back

Ummmmmm

Let me digg deeper!!

Il be back.

Sly stallone, Bruce Willis and arnie were interviewed for a movie bout musical legends, sly said I'll be mozart, Bruce said I'll be beethoven, Annie said fuck off I'm not saying it "

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By *JJ_6969Man
over a year ago

Aspull

"nice guys" tend not to actually be nice.

They act nice and respectful at first with the hopes of getting to have sex with the person they're being 'nice' to. When it's evident that the nice guy isn't going to get have sex with her, he then reverts to what he actually is, a arsehole of the highest degree

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Self-proclaimed 'nice' guys are anything but. There's another reason why these types come last"

We all or most get found out in anything in life! From our

" deep intentions "

Many esp get chosen for looks at first. But as time goes on, their actions dont match what they day or do say

Then many esp women drift apart . Leaveing the other to wonder what actually happened. But mainly women have moved on emotionly long ago.

At first what was the lure,excitement??

Somegthing changes,for it to change too.

?? Anybody relate to any of this?? In some what way?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Most women claim they want a nice guy but when they get one they quick to get rid of him or find a reason to get rid of him"

I wouldnt agree with that

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By *aptain Caveman41Man
over a year ago

Home

There is a saying "everybody has a cross to bare" unfortunately mine is im a as people tell me I'm a lovely fella which is about as useful as a lighthouse in a bog when it comes to the women

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Most women claim they want a nice guy but when they get one they quick to get rid of him or find a reason to get rid of him"

He 's boreing,and a Bastard. Pays me nò attention. Etc

Chad n tyrone cum along,its all fixed

Mark and abdul are on the heap d*unk in a mess.

Lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"There is a very interesting take on this by Jordan Peterson and ultimately most women look for a man who is capable of chasing the monsters away in real life.

I'm not sure Jordan Peterson is the best source of "what most women want"

I'm darn sure he's not, bless his ill fitting suit"

Neither! Well spotted. Young lady you have a keen eye?

I require a sidekick anð Pa. But you are taken.

Keep smiling

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"There is a very interesting take on this by Jordan Peterson and ultimately most women look for a man who is capable of chasing the monsters away in real life.

I'm not sure Jordan Peterson is the best source of "what most women want"

I'm darn sure he's not, bless his ill fitting suit

Neither! Well spotted. Young lady you have a keen eye?

I require a sidekick anð Pa. But you are taken.

Keep smiling "

Well let's get into it then, what is it that most women want??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"People who have to proclaim themselves as nice tend to come last.

You see, we were talking about people we thought were nice guys and you see the way people have taken the piss out of them.

Work places have over looked them for promotion for the asshole in the office. Or the way they get fucked over by a lover (man or woman)

Normaly if say those that are ruthless and not so nice succeed with what they want.

"

" Fallen down " comes to mind! M douglas looses his shit. Over a can of " Coke.. lol ?

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By *iscean_dreamMan
over a year ago

Llanelli

I refuse to let her fake it before I do, I'm a complete arsehole

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By *ames-77Man
over a year ago

milton keynes


"90% of the time this is true its not

If you say so

I do...

In that case in your opinion they don't come last .. Other peoples opinion they do

Who's opinion?? The 'nice guys' let's be realistic here"

I know it's silly .. who cares anyway

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Thought I’d split the room with this topic title!

I was with a group of guys this week and this was quoted, and we all unanimously agreed this is ‘somewhat’ true.

What does the fab forum think?

I think this is about context and interpretation.

I agree insofar as I am a pretty quiet, reserved, polite chap. I’m not someone who is full of arrogance, narcissism and empty promises. I often find other men are favoured because they (figuratively) thrust themselves on women with peacocking, in which I refuse to engage (not least because I don’t have the credentials to back it up).

I would far rather have someone appreciate me for me, but that does mean I miss out on women I really fancy.

I know folk will say “in that case they’re not right for you”, but it doesn’t hurt any less when you think about them."

We all are a moveing part,that plays a part! In the grand scheme of things really.

Even a small Natt & ant are something? Do we ,could we learn from them?

Many have do and will look over me Daily on here!

One's worth is no less. Because some or manÿ cannot see it with their very open eyes.

Something far deeper is at play here amongst us all on fabb and wider world.

I shall reveal " one day "

Keep smiling all.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Thought I’d split the room with this topic title!

I was with a group of guys this week and this was quoted, and we all unanimously agreed this is ‘somewhat’ true.

What does the fab forum think?

I think this is about context and interpretation.

I agree insofar as I am a pretty quiet, reserved, polite chap. I’m not someone who is full of arrogance, narcissism and empty promises. I often find other men are favoured because they (figuratively) thrust themselves on women with peacocking, in which I refuse to engage (not least because I don’t have the credentials to back it up).

I would far rather have someone appreciate me for me, but that does mean I miss out on women I really fancy.

I know folk will say “in that case they’re not right for you”, but it doesn’t hurt any less when you think about them.

We all are a moveing part,that plays a part! In the grand scheme of things really.

Even a small Natt & ant are something? Do we ,could we learn from them?

Many have do and will look over me Daily on here!

One's worth is no less. Because some or manÿ cannot see it with their very open eyes.

Something far deeper is at play here amongst us all on fabb and wider world.

I shall reveal " one day "

Keep smiling all. "

Hahaha what the hell

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By *agneto.Man
over a year ago

Bham

People in expensive cars driving like absolute cocks, parking across two bays because they're so important. Parking in disabled or parent bays because they're so important.

They're not nice. And they've succeeded somewhat. Do you have to be a cock to succeed?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Have no expectations of anything. Then you wont be disappointed. Only by your own very actions alone.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Thought I’d split the room with this topic title!

I was with a group of guys this week and this was quoted, and we all unanimously agreed this is ‘somewhat’ true.

What does the fab forum think?

I think this is about context and interpretation.

I agree insofar as I am a pretty quiet, reserved, polite chap. I’m not someone who is full of arrogance, narcissism and empty promises. I often find other men are favoured because they (figuratively) thrust themselves on women with peacocking, in which I refuse to engage (not least because I don’t have the credentials to back it up).

I would far rather have someone appreciate me for me, but that does mean I miss out on women I really fancy.

I know folk will say “in that case they’re not right for you”, but it doesn’t hurt any less when you think about them.

We all are a moveing part,that plays a part! In the grand scheme of things really.

Even a small Natt & ant are something? Do we ,could we learn from them?

Many have do and will look over me Daily on here!

One's worth is no less. Because some or manÿ cannot see it with their very open eyes.

Something far deeper is at play here amongst us all on fabb and wider world.

I shall reveal " one day "

Keep smiling all.

Hahaha what the hell"

Domt worry. Keep what you do.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"People in expensive cars driving like absolute cocks, parking across two bays because they're so important. Parking in disabled or parent bays because they're so important.

They're not nice. And they've succeeded somewhat. Do you have to be a cock to succeed? "

Jesus christ this is a stupid analogy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"People in expensive cars driving like absolute cocks, parking across two bays because they're so important. Parking in disabled or parent bays because they're so important.

They're not nice. And they've succeeded somewhat. Do you have to be a cock to succeed? "

A cock succeeds only what it is attached to and enters. Job done??

A mindset? Takes a mondset? What they do heh.

How do they do it? Could you? Would you? Do you? Have you? Will you?

Brain storming ,get juices flowing of thought.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"There is a saying "everybody has a cross to bare" unfortunately mine is im a as people tell me I'm a lovely fella which is about as useful as a lighthouse in a bog when it comes to the women "

You can be,what you wish and dream of. Become it,do it in actions.

Put in the work,graft.

You haven given up on you!!

Read what you just wrote?

Do it for you. Not for the women.they come and go.like men do.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"There is a very interesting take on this by Jordan Peterson and ultimately most women look for a man who is capable of chasing the monsters away in real life.

I'm not sure Jordan Peterson is the best source of "what most women want"

I'm darn sure he's not, bless his ill fitting suit

Neither! Well spotted. Young lady you have a keen eye?

I require a sidekick anð Pa. But you are taken.

Keep smiling

Well let's get into it then, what is it that most women want??"

Ok. What does your woman want? Your a couple!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I refuse to let her fake it before I do, I'm a complete arsehole "

Arseholes come first. Some say. Heard it somewhere. Lol

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By *eadjeyecMan
over a year ago

Bucks/London

I have been told multiple times I’m “too nice and sweet” seems that if you have “lad” behaviour in you then it works in your favour. However I do prefer to treat people with respect and as I expect to be treated so hopefully it works in the long run

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I have been told multiple times I’m “too nice and sweet” seems that if you have “lad” behaviour in you then it works in your favour. However I do prefer to treat people with respect and as I expect to be treated so hopefully it works in the long run "
ya they say that coz they ain't interested

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I have been told multiple times I’m “too nice and sweet” seems that if you have “lad” behaviour in you then it works in your favour. However I do prefer to treat people with respect and as I expect to be treated so hopefully it works in the long run ya they say that coz they ain't interested "

A women mentioned on a thread about, what got you to fab? Oh nobody finds me atteactive enough on date sites. Hence why iam here. Iam tall.high sex drive , dont like vanilla either.

But i have to fancey them!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I have been told multiple times I’m “too nice and sweet” seems that if you have “lad” behaviour in you then it works in your favour. However I do prefer to treat people with respect and as I expect to be treated so hopefully it works in the long run ya they say that coz they ain't interested

A women mentioned on a thread about, what got you to fab? Oh nobody finds me atteactive enough on date sites. Hence why iam here. Iam tall.high sex drive , dont like vanilla either.

But i have to fancey them!

"

Attraction is a huge part of this!! Jaysus like..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I have been told multiple times I’m “too nice and sweet” seems that if you have “lad” behaviour in you then it works in your favour. However I do prefer to treat people with respect and as I expect to be treated so hopefully it works in the long run ya they say that coz they ain't interested

A women mentioned on a thread about, what got you to fab? Oh nobody finds me atteactive enough on date sites. Hence why iam here. Iam tall.high sex drive , dont like vanilla either.

But i have to fancey them!

Attraction is a huge part of this!! Jaysus like.."

It is.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"……

Ummmmmm

Let me digg deeper!!

Il be back.

Sly stallone, Bruce Willis and arnie were interviewed for a movie bout musical legends, sly said I'll be mozart, Bruce said I'll be beethoven, Annie said fuck off I'm not saying it "

.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Thought I’d split the room with this topic title!

I was with a group of guys this week and this was quoted, and we all unanimously agreed this is ‘somewhat’ true.

What does the fab forum think? "

It's like riding a bike. There's just no fun in the environmentally friendly push bike that you need to motivate, put effort into to keep it going. What you really want to be riding is a Suzuki, strong , powerful, sexy , ready to take you further and enjoy the ride. But eventually, you want car. More comfortable but still ticks all the boxes. Maybe don't feel as wild and free but it's nothing to lose by the time your ready for a car, it's cold on that bike!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Thought I’d split the room with this topic title!

I was with a group of guys this week and this was quoted, and we all unanimously agreed this is ‘somewhat’ true.

What does the fab forum think?

It's like riding a bike. There's just no fun in the environmentally friendly push bike that you need to motivate, put effort into to keep it going. What you really want to be riding is a Suzuki, strong , powerful, sexy , ready to take you further and enjoy the ride. But eventually, you want car. More comfortable but still ticks all the boxes. Maybe don't feel as wild and free but it's nothing to lose by the time your ready for a car, it's cold on that bike! "

Nice! Walking bike,car. Where ever your mind can really take you! Keep it moveing fabbers.

Iam here reach out!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Thought I’d split the room with this topic title!

I was with a group of guys this week and this was quoted, and we all unanimously agreed this is ‘somewhat’ true.

What does the fab forum think?

It's like riding a bike. There's just no fun in the environmentally friendly push bike that you need to motivate, put effort into to keep it going. What you really want to be riding is a Suzuki, strong , powerful, sexy , ready to take you further and enjoy the ride. But eventually, you want car. More comfortable but still ticks all the boxes. Maybe don't feel as wild and free but it's nothing to lose by the time your ready for a car, it's cold on that bike! "

haha. I like walking.

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By *iscean_dreamMan
over a year ago

Llanelli


"I refuse to let her fake it before I do, I'm a complete arsehole

Arseholes come first. Some say. Heard it somewhere. Lol"

I'm no expert on arseholes, I've been in a few though

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By *weetkitten65Woman
over a year ago

Halifax


"Thought I’d split the room with this topic title!

I was with a group of guys this week and this was quoted, and we all unanimously agreed this is ‘somewhat’ true.

What does the fab forum think? "

Works the same for us ladies

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By *aribbean King 1985Man
over a year ago

South West London


"Most women claim they want a nice guy but when they get one they quick to get rid of him or find a reason to get rid of him

I wouldnt agree with that "

Ok you're entitled to disagree but how come I know a few women who dumped a guy because in their words, the guys that they were seeing were "too nice"??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think this idea comes from self proclaimed nice guys with a sense of entitlement.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


""nice guys" tend not to actually be nice.

They act nice and respectful at first with the hopes of getting to have sex with the person they're being 'nice' to. When it's evident that the nice guy isn't going to get have sex with her, he then reverts to what he actually is, a arsehole of the highest degree"

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By *icassolifelikeMan
over a year ago

Luton


"Thought I’d split the room with this topic title!

I was with a group of guys this week and this was quoted, and we all unanimously agreed this is ‘somewhat’ true.

What does the fab forum think? "

Be a prick then and see how far you get?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Thought I’d split the room with this topic title!

I was with a group of guys this week and this was quoted, and we all unanimously agreed this is ‘somewhat’ true.

What does the fab forum think?

Be a prick then and see how far you get? "

I’ll be back soon after I’ve done my practical research.

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By *ainbows_can_be_metal_tooCouple
over a year ago

Darlington

It's usually only a saying thrown out by people trying to justify being an absolute twat

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You can't just expect because you're a nice person things will come your way, life isn't like that. In work, relationships, friends.

It requires skills, experience, motivation and being able to 'read' what specifics are required.

Fuck all to do with being nice or not.

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By *ea monkeyMan
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

To me it smacks of entitlement.

Thinking that being ‘nice’ will get you an all access pass to a woman’s body. Being nice is the minimum entry level for being a human being and goes along with a hundred other aspects of attraction.

If the only thing about you is that you treat another human with a basic level of decency, then that’s the reason why you’re finishing last.

Also; this kind of self pitying BS removes any level of responsibility with the guy and places all of it on the other person. It’s toxic

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By *inky_couple2020Couple
over a year ago

North West


"People in expensive cars driving like absolute cocks, parking across two bays because they're so important. Parking in disabled or parent bays because they're so important.

They're not nice. And they've succeeded somewhat. Do you have to be a cock to succeed? "

They've only "succeeded" in one small bit of life. Hell, it might just be a leased car that they can't really afford! I don't drive a fancy car, but I feel like I succeeded in life because I have the most amazing husband and lovely kids. I don't earn a huge wage and I'm unlikely to discover the cure for cancer or otherwise set the world on fire.

How do you measure success at life?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"In all honesty I think any man declaring he knows best what women want is almost certainly going to be patriarchal bullshit.

I confess my ignorance to any such declarations. Do you have any links or sources to any examples of this 'patriarchal bullshit'?

I think when that sane man has multiple accusations of misogyny from multiple sources then it's definitely best to be suspicious.

Such as...? Again, forgive my ignorance.

Of course, I'm all ears of you want to substantiate the original claim?

Oh, I think it's much more the place of the ladies present to either confirm or deny that, don't you? But I've heard from several sources, be it clinical psychology, evolutionary psychology, anthropology, sexology, etc... that all would be supportive of such claims. I'm all ears if you have anything that would suggest otherwise, of course."

You’ve got google Merces. Knock yourself out…

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"People in expensive cars driving like absolute cocks, parking across two bays because they're so important. Parking in disabled or parent bays because they're so important.

They're not nice. And they've succeeded somewhat. Do you have to be a cock to succeed?

They've only "succeeded" in one small bit of life. Hell, it might just be a leased car that they can't really afford! I don't drive a fancy car, but I feel like I succeeded in life because I have the most amazing husband and lovely kids. I don't earn a huge wage and I'm unlikely to discover the cure for cancer or otherwise set the world on fire.

How do you measure success at life?"

With a sky remote!

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By *isfits behaving badlyCouple
over a year ago

Coventry

Yep it's a cop out really isn't? Plenty of successful, desired and well respected nice guys out there. A big part of my success in life is because of my compassion, love and the way I treat others around me. I am a nice guy and proud of it and it has served me well in life. But I am not a fool, not nieve and a man of substance. It's used so often on here to scapegoat people's lack of success. I mean people can tell themselves whatever spin makes them feel better but doing so ain't going to help them going forward.

However with all that said above there are some women in my experience out there who are genuinely not ready for a nice guy for various reasons, baggage and trauma. Which is sad and says a lot about the world in the shoes of a woman.

And of course some women are not nice women. In my experience when someone who isn't nice or doesn't love themselve gets with someone who is nice they eventually come to hate the other person's good qualities. I think because this amplifiers their own character flaws and thus is a source for greater levels of internal hatred. So I guess my point is some women actively want someone who is equality not so nice.

Which is why I've discovered it's not just good enough to be at a stage of personal emotional maturity and self love. You need to find someone who is likewise on the same.

So yes there can be reasons why some women don't seek nice guys. But in general scapegoating this is a cop out because on the whole it is a desirable feature when combined with other features that contribute to success.

Mr

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By *ornyHumpyMan95Man
over a year ago

Prestatyn


"Thought I’d split the room with this topic title!

I was with a group of guys this week and this was quoted, and we all unanimously agreed this is ‘somewhat’ true.

What does the fab forum think? "

Unfortunately this is true, I was a nice guy before and got nowhere, now I'm done being nice

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By *ainbows_can_be_metal_tooCouple
over a year ago

Darlington

Absolutely this. So many blokes think that just because they are nice to women that they are obliged to give them sex. No mate, not how people work

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By *ingle ex cuckMan
over a year ago

chester

I was nice to a woman on here buying her perfume and lingerie

Then I got a message of a guy saying keep up the good work

So I asked him what he meant

He replied saying he would display his verifications for 20 mins

I read them and he was the fuck buddy of the woman I was spoiling

She then watts apped me saying I was a nice guy

Buy that's all I was

She was right in my view

And I enjoyed doing what I did

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

In a gangbang setting or in real life ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think nice guys get quality over quantity

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By *adMerWoman
over a year ago

Sandwich


"I don't believe it is true at all.

I think they are plenty of men who believe in their own heads they are nice guys but who are actually quite the opposite.They tell you how nice they are and how you really should be with them and then throw strops when they don't get what they want. I've seen it so many times on here even guys who have it in the names that they are nice and kind and caring are often far from it.It is used as an excuse as to why people don't fancy them or want to interact with them. Being nice does not entitle you to anything more than anyone else,in fact it should be a basic necessity and not something you think is unique.

Yes there are women who prefer the more outgoing jack the lad types but a hell of a lot more prefer decent men. Men who are actually nice and kind but are willing to speak their minds without insulting others,and share their opinions and not being afraid to say things that go against the grain if that's they feel that way. Men who aren't afraid to be themselves and don't feel the need to put on an act.

And of course there are people who will take advantage of nice people that happens and it's shit and those people are the lowest of the low. And if you have to buy affection then that whole relationship is based on a very shaky foundation that will collapse.

But thinking and using the excuse that nice guys finish last is just an excuse that a lot use to excuse the fact that someone they like doesn't like them back the way. But really would they really want to be with someone who they will never be enough for anyhow. Don't ever be someone that somebody else has just settled for when they thought there wasn't a better option. No one deserves to be second best in a relationship."

This exactly!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Hmm the phrase 'nice guys' is very negative in my mind - it conjures up an image of a bloke moaning about not having something delivered on a plate that they are 'entitled' to have, despite making zero effort or work... Just because they are 'nice'..

I say get off your arse, be less entitled and actively work for what you want

We never get 100% what we want.. That's just life.. Nothing to do with being nice or not "

Nawww don't agree with you on this one lady , a nice guy is simply a guy that has respect for things he's associated with and a nice guy will get walked on , trampled on by people that are just not nice , a person who wants to reach the top of whatever it is will walk all over anyone who they can but it's only time that shows a " nice " guy who is who in this life and then the " nice " guy has absolutely no problem at all telling the other type to fuck off and still remain nice , as in , they have respect for everything in their life , simple really , " nice " guys do find their soulmate in life and they keep the " not at all nice " out of their life because they bring nothing... absolutely nothing to it..l would rather hang out with a nice guy that a selfish self centered, arrogant , pompous , obnoxious asshole anytime...nice guys are always welcome in my World anytime

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"To me it smacks of entitlement.

Thinking that being ‘nice’ will get you an all access pass to a woman’s body. Being nice is the minimum entry level for being a human being and goes along with a hundred other aspects of attraction.

If the only thing about you is that you treat another human with a basic level of decency, then that’s the reason why you’re finishing last.

Also; this kind of self pitying BS removes any level of responsibility with the guy and places all of it on the other person. It’s toxic"

A person will only get ,as you say ,an all access pass, if the woman decides you will .

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By *host63Man
over a year ago

Bedfont Feltham


"Hmm the phrase 'nice guys' is very negative in my mind - it conjures up an image of a bloke moaning about not having something delivered on a plate that they are 'entitled' to have, despite making zero effort or work... Just because they are 'nice'..

I say get off your arse, be less entitled and actively work for what you want

We never get 100% what we want.. That's just life.. Nothing to do with being nice or not "

Frankly I find that a sense of entitlement is more likely to be found in women.

In my life I face a lot of challenges from my disability and life in general.i put my head down, get on with it, expect nothing.

I am amazed by how many women on here expect everything to be handed to the on a plate.

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By *host63Man
over a year ago

Bedfont Feltham


"Thought I’d split the room with this topic title!

I was with a group of guys this week and this was quoted, and we all unanimously agreed this is ‘somewhat’ true.

What does the fab forum think? "

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By *host63Man
over a year ago

Bedfont Feltham


"Thought I’d split the room with this topic title!

I was with a group of guys this week and this was quoted, and we all unanimously agreed this is ‘somewhat’ true.

What does the fab forum think? "

To reprise my comment I am perfectly happy to be decent and polite to women but I also expect the same in return. Far to women think they deserve to be put on a pedestal despite how badly they behave. Personally so called nice guys come last because they cater to women like this. That's called simping.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Yep it's a cop out really isn't? Plenty of successful, desired and well respected nice guys out there. A big part of my success in life is because of my compassion, love and the way I treat others around me. I am a nice guy and proud of it and it has served me well in life. But I am not a fool, not nieve and a man of substance. It's used so often on here to scapegoat people's lack of success. I mean people can tell themselves whatever spin makes them feel better but doing so ain't going to help them going forward.

However with all that said above there are some women in my experience out there who are genuinely not ready for a nice guy for various reasons, baggage and trauma. Which is sad and says a lot about the world in the shoes of a woman.

And of course some women are not nice women. In my experience when someone who isn't nice or doesn't love themselve gets with someone who is nice they eventually come to hate the other person's good qualities. I think because this amplifiers their own character flaws and thus is a source for greater levels of internal hatred. So I guess my point is some women actively want someone who is equality not so nice.

Which is why I've discovered it's not just good enough to be at a stage of personal emotional maturity and self love. You need to find someone who is likewise on the same.

So yes there can be reasons why some women don't seek nice guys. But in general scapegoating this is a cop out because on the whole it is a desirable feature when combined with other features that contribute to success.

Mr"

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By *avexxMan
over a year ago

cheshire

shit thats why i always come last then.. no more mr nice guy,

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By *erces LetiferMan
over a year ago

Somewhere off the edge of the map... 'ere there be monsters


"You’ve got google Merces. Knock yourself out…"

You're alright, ta. I tend not to do other people's research for them. I've come across plenty of JBP content of my own volition and never seen the things claimed above. Again, I'm all ears to being educated further on the matter.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Person a offers the pay for the first date and then tries to buy the first round on subsequent dates however makes it clear to his date that he's not well off

and and therefore they need to budget accordingly.

Person b pays for the first date and all subsequent dates even they he can't afford it.

Person b probably feels that he's a nicer guy then person a and also person see who pays for everything but can't afford it. Overtime I'm he probably starts to resent not being recognised for his niceness especially given all the sacrifices he feels he is making.

He is dumped for being too nice.

Note in neither case is the woman expecting for the guy to pay for everything. While there will be some women who have bad behaviours if someone accept that then it's not being nice it's being a doormat.

Finally if you are going to stop being nice because it means you're not getting laid then the only reason you are being nice is to get something yourself. That's not nice. That's manipulative.

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By *inky_couple2020Couple
over a year ago

North West


" Finally if you are going to stop being nice because it means you're not getting laid then the only reason you are being nice is to get something yourself. That's not nice. That's manipulative."

So much this!!! Scary how many men are saying "I won't be nice anymore". They weren't genuinely nice to begin with

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We would like to find a chilled nice guy that we are happy with for more regular meets.really not interested in dick heads and there are a few of them about.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"You’ve got google Merces. Knock yourself out…

You're alright, ta. I tend not to do other people's research for them. I've come across plenty of JBP content of my own volition and never seen the things claimed above. Again, I'm all ears to being educated further on the matter. "

Yes, I’ve spotted this type of thing in a few threads now from yourself and others.

‘Give me proof’.

Everyone sends examples.

‘Rubbish’ is the response.

Largely a pointless exercise, there is no wish to be ‘educated’, it’s a wind up.

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By *aitonelMan
over a year ago

Travelling


"You’ve got google Merces. Knock yourself out…

You're alright, ta. I tend not to do other people's research for them. I've come across plenty of JBP content of my own volition and never seen the things claimed above. Again, I'm all ears to being educated further on the matter.

Yes, I’ve spotted this type of thing in a few threads now from yourself and others.

‘Give me proof’.

Everyone sends examples.

‘Rubbish’ is the response.

Largely a pointless exercise, there is no wish to be ‘educated’, it’s a wind up."

Indeed. It is becoming more and more obvious a lot of people just don't want to learn or attempt to have their opinion changed/admit they were wrong despite facts presented.

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By *erces LetiferMan
over a year ago

Somewhere off the edge of the map... 'ere there be monsters


"Yes, I’ve spotted this type of thing in a few threads now from yourself and others.

‘Give me proof’.

Everyone sends examples.

‘Rubbish’ is the response.

Largely a pointless exercise, there is no wish to be ‘educated’, it’s a wind up."

*shrug* Suit yourself. Personally I'm always open to have a discussion, and to assess new information on subjects on which I'm still ignorant. In fact, it's one of JBP's so-called "rules for life," which is; 'assume the other person knows something you do not.' I'm fine doing that. What I'm not fine doing, however, it just accepting claims made on the internet completely on face value, which is usually on some sort of notion like "everybody knows that X is Y"... or "lots of people have said Y is a Z" with no actual proof given. I used to just go with the majority flow in the rise of social media. I think I've re-learned to be a little bit more sceptical the past couple of years, I guess. That's no bad thing, in my opinion, and believe we should all be a bit more discerning about the "facts" we just accept on face value.


"Indeed. It is becoming more and more obvious a lot of people just don't want to learn or attempt to have their opinion changed/admit they were wrong despite facts presented."

Yep. It really is a shame how social media seems to have made everyone retreat into their bubble/echo chamber... never willing to hear alternative information. People don't WANT their opinions changed. So they just dig their heels in. I guess what it boils down to in this particular case is, I no longer accept things like "well everybody just knows" or "just Google it" as 'facts presented.'

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By *ottodot123Couple
over a year ago

Gillingham

In my experience. If someone has to go out of their way to explain they are a 'nice guy' then they probably are not.

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By *ottodot123Couple
over a year ago

Gillingham

Also. If a woman says you're 'too nice' she probably means you're boring and not sexy and just trying to be kind about it.

I am NOT however advocating that behaviour or lying as it just feeds the nice guys finish last phenomenon.

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By *ottodot123Couple
over a year ago

Gillingham


"To me it smacks of entitlement.

Thinking that being ‘nice’ will get you an all access pass to a woman’s body. Being nice is the minimum entry level for being a human being and goes along with a hundred other aspects of attraction.

If the only thing about you is that you treat another human with a basic level of decency, then that’s the reason why you’re finishing last.

Also; this kind of self pitying BS removes any level of responsibility with the guy and places all of it on the other person. It’s toxic"

Perfect answer

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By *TG3Man
over a year ago

Dorchester

Oh no they dont

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


" Finally if you are going to stop being nice because it means you're not getting laid then the only reason you are being nice is to get something yourself. That's not nice. That's manipulative.

So much this!!! Scary how many men are saying "I won't be nice anymore". They weren't genuinely nice to begin with "

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