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"Fresh off the married thread, how trusting are you of people you meet on here? Do you share real names, home addresses, social media profiles, phone numbers, email addresses, where you work, what you do etc.? If so how soon after talking? Are you ever afraid that someone could use that information against you? If so how do you protect yourself? Meet at clubs/hotels only, use a burner phone/email address, use fake names, never divulge more than you need to? . I admit to being a bit daft when we started and having people over to the house without meeting for a social first, sharing phone numbers to chat (not using telegram like we do now) There are a few people who know what I do for a living, as well as where I work, but not many. I’m fairly open about my life to some of my friends, and my family (those that are alive) likely wouldn’t care. My job… it may get interesting… but no more so than anyone else's. I don’t work in a reportable profession. We have no kids to worry about gossip at the school gates. . So how trusting are you, or how do you protect yourself?" I'm not trusting of anyone I'd meet on here but that's the same for people off Fab too. Some people can be utter untrustworthy knobs. My best mate of 20 years turned out to be one. ![]() | |||
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"My job is mot important enough or do I care what others think. However when it comes to potential chats and meets I will withhold my address till I meet them at a club or social that goes for single females couples or groups. I don't keep valuable items on me ie my phone ands bank cares or invite anyone to my home until I am 100% sure they are genuine. " If guess there are a range of different risks to consider; theft, verbal abuse, coercement, stalking, physical abuse, revenge porn / reputation damage. I think women & gay men are likely most at risk and should be very careful meeting strangers. Only meet verified people who don’t avoid questions or normal methods of comms - unscheduled phone calls are great etc Meet in public places. If at a hotel use the safe for everything but your phone. If worried don’t do it - or have an escape plan. Trust your gut Be safe ![]() | |||
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"Fresh off the married thread, how trusting are you of people you meet on here? Do you share real names, home addresses, social media profiles, phone numbers, email addresses, where you work, what you do etc.? If so how soon after talking? Are you ever afraid that someone could use that information against you? If so how do you protect yourself? Meet at clubs/hotels only, use a burner phone/email address, use fake names, never divulge more than you need to? . I admit to being a bit daft when we started and having people over to the house without meeting for a social first, sharing phone numbers to chat (not using telegram like we do now) There are a few people who know what I do for a living, as well as where I work, but not many. I’m fairly open about my life to some of my friends, and my family (those that are alive) likely wouldn’t care. My job… it may get interesting… but no more so than anyone else's. I don’t work in a reportable profession. We have no kids to worry about gossip at the school gates. . So how trusting are you, or how do you protect yourself?" With my double trauma, I trust no-one completely. My BPD side doesn't really care. The rest of my neurodivergent brain thinks...if I'm not harming, myself or others, physically or psychologically what exactly is the problem. People do establish friendships from Fab and I have a separate phone. Having been (being) crazy myself, I now know the signs that someone is probably a bit unstable. However, I judge by how they handle that instability. I know the work it takes to keep stable so when I see others trying, I let them have that. I let people know about my crazy and it's up to them to decide if they are comfortable with my level of crazy. That said I have a separate phone. My company has a very tight internet policy so I can't say the company name publically online but the company can't police who sees me and who talks to me in person. And any workplace harassment, I will be going straight to the police. I'm entitled to my personal life off duty. | |||
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"My job is mot important enough or do I care what others think. However when it comes to potential chats and meets I will withhold my address till I meet them at a club or social that goes for single females couples or groups. I don't keep valuable items on me ie my phone ands bank cares or invite anyone to my home until I am 100% sure they are genuine. If guess there are a range of different risks to consider; theft, verbal abuse, coercement, stalking, physical abuse, revenge porn / reputation damage. I think women & gay men are likely most at risk and should be very careful meeting strangers. Only meet verified people who don’t avoid questions or normal methods of comms - unscheduled phone calls are great etc Meet in public places. If at a hotel use the safe for everything but your phone. If worried don’t do it - or have an escape plan. Trust your gut Be safe ![]() My neurodivergent brain hates phone calls. I'm always in meetings throughout the day so most 9-5 unscheduled calls go unanswered by me. Outside those hours I'm often in the Tube, grocery shopping or some other place that has no signal or space for me to talk. It's always interesting opening Fab near some teenagers in public to a giant dick pic. Remember the MP caught looking at porn on his phone.....lol! | |||
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"Fresh off the married thread, how trusting are you of people you meet on here? Do you share real names, home addresses, social media profiles, phone numbers, email addresses, where you work, what you do etc.? If so how soon after talking? Are you ever afraid that someone could use that information against you? If so how do you protect yourself? Meet at clubs/hotels only, use a burner phone/email address, use fake names, never divulge more than you need to? . I admit to being a bit daft when we started and having people over to the house without meeting for a social first, sharing phone numbers to chat (not using telegram like we do now) There are a few people who know what I do for a living, as well as where I work, but not many. I’m fairly open about my life to some of my friends, and my family (those that are alive) likely wouldn’t care. My job… it may get interesting… but no more so than anyone else's. I don’t work in a reportable profession. We have no kids to worry about gossip at the school gates. . So how trusting are you, or how do you protect yourself? I'm not trusting of anyone I'd meet on here but that's the same for people off Fab too. Some people can be utter untrustworthy knobs. My best mate of 20 years turned out to be one. ![]() If it took you 20 years to figure that then I think you are probably right to trust no one. People can change yes but they don’t normally change from being loyal & trustworthy to not, unless through addiction, the opposite is more likely people generally become better with time | |||
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"My job is mot important enough or do I care what others think. However when it comes to potential chats and meets I will withhold my address till I meet them at a club or social that goes for single females couples or groups. I don't keep valuable items on me ie my phone ands bank cares or invite anyone to my home until I am 100% sure they are genuine. If guess there are a range of different risks to consider; theft, verbal abuse, coercement, stalking, physical abuse, revenge porn / reputation damage. I think women & gay men are likely most at risk and should be very careful meeting strangers. Only meet verified people who don’t avoid questions or normal methods of comms - unscheduled phone calls are great etc Meet in public places. If at a hotel use the safe for everything but your phone. If worried don’t do it - or have an escape plan. Trust your gut Be safe ![]() You’re clearly very special. An explanation like that is all it needs. But for most guys a quick call in an evening to say hi what are you doing isn’t an unreasonable ask of someone you’re thinking of having sex with Love the structured profile, very easy to follow ![]() | |||
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"Fresh off the married thread, how trusting are you of people you meet on here? Do you share real names, home addresses, social media profiles, phone numbers, email addresses, where you work, what you do etc.? If so how soon after talking? Are you ever afraid that someone could use that information against you? If so how do you protect yourself? Meet at clubs/hotels only, use a burner phone/email address, use fake names, never divulge more than you need to? . I admit to being a bit daft when we started and having people over to the house without meeting for a social first, sharing phone numbers to chat (not using telegram like we do now) There are a few people who know what I do for a living, as well as where I work, but not many. I’m fairly open about my life to some of my friends, and my family (those that are alive) likely wouldn’t care. My job… it may get interesting… but no more so than anyone else's. I don’t work in a reportable profession. We have no kids to worry about gossip at the school gates. . So how trusting are you, or how do you protect yourself? I'm not trusting of anyone I'd meet on here but that's the same for people off Fab too. Some people can be utter untrustworthy knobs. My best mate of 20 years turned out to be one. ![]() I have no idea if she was a cunt the whole 20 years. I really don't fucking care. | |||
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"I only trust people who have good verifications and even then I'm very wary about what I tell them and to be honest we are all here for the same thing so why would you tell them your personal stuff ? " Why do people think we are all on here for the same thing? ![]() | |||
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"The only thing we share is our real names. We don’t give out our phone number or any of our social media. We don’t mind telling people what do we for work but wouldn’t share for which company etc. years ago when we first signed up we did invite a few people over but after a bad experience we’d rather meet at hotels or clubs now. " The things we wish we knew when we started. We have been lucky in that the first few meets we had over before we understood about the benefits of socials never went bad, but I consider that luck more than anything. | |||
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"My job is mot important enough or do I care what others think. However when it comes to potential chats and meets I will withhold my address till I meet them at a club or social that goes for single females couples or groups. I don't keep valuable items on me ie my phone ands bank cares or invite anyone to my home until I am 100% sure they are genuine. " Not taking valuables with you to a first meet is a sensible approach. I do try and advise people to not make themselves targets of crime. Not wearing jewellery, watches, flashing cash or phones etc. | |||
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"I’m very trusting but can normally tell if people are dangerous before meeting or inviting them to mine so it’s trust until proven wrong or my instinct says otherwise. Never had any major issues with single females. A couple got verbally abusive when dumped but nothing that worried me. Couple of weird couples over the years, pushy controlling guys but met them at hotels first as wasn’t 100% sure. Overall nothing that would cause me concern or change my behaviour. " Trust until they give you a reason not to trust them is what we all tend to do, as we all want to see the good in people. Being wary of others is healthy though. Its usually good to trust your gut, even if it means you miss out on someone that actually is a decent fit. I’m lucky I guess in that I haven’t met many pushy people, but then being pushy myself I am likely “that guy”! ![]() | |||
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"I do with people that I’ve met or I build that trust with through private chats. If people ask questions I’m generally happy to answer. I know someone locally on here who is quite open about her situation and people take liberties (messaging her husband, stopping her when our with her kids etc)" Messaging her husband about what she is up to? I assume he knows? Taking liberties with people, just because they may overshare is not okay. It smacks of entitled behaviour. | |||
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"I'm not trusting of anyone I'd meet on here but that's the same for people off Fab too. Some people can be utter untrustworthy knobs. My best mate of 20 years turned out to be one. ![]() I’m the least trustworthy, trustworthy person I know. I’m a massive dick, but also not a dick. I am the nicest, not very nice person you can take home to meet your folks. I was told that I don’t like myself, and I think I would agree with that ![]() | |||
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"If guess there are a range of different risks to consider; theft, verbal abuse, coercement, stalking, physical abuse, revenge porn / reputation damage. I think women & gay men are likely most at risk and should be very careful meeting strangers. Only meet verified people who don’t avoid questions or normal methods of comms - unscheduled phone calls are great etc Meet in public places. If at a hotel use the safe for everything but your phone. If worried don’t do it - or have an escape plan. Trust your gut Be safe ![]() Another suggestion is the safety call. For a fuck site, there are so many risks that people tend to ignore or just assume won’t happen to them. I’ve known too many people on fab and other sites be outed to family, friends and their employers. And for what? Because they got rejected? Because they said no? Jealousy? A desire to drive them away or break up relationships? One person I know had photos posted through her parents letter box. | |||
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"With my double trauma, I trust no-one completely. My BPD side doesn't really care. The rest of my neurodivergent brain thinks...if I'm not harming, myself or others, physically or psychologically what exactly is the problem. People do establish friendships from Fab and I have a separate phone. Having been (being) crazy myself, I now know the signs that someone is probably a bit unstable. However, I judge by how they handle that instability. I know the work it takes to keep stable so when I see others trying, I let them have that. I let people know about my crazy and it's up to them to decide if they are comfortable with my level of crazy. That said I have a separate phone. My company has a very tight internet policy so I can't say the company name publically online but the company can't police who sees me and who talks to me in person. And any workplace harassment, I will be going straight to the police. I'm entitled to my personal life off duty." I think we all have the capability, if not the capacity, to be a little crazy at times. As you say its how we deal with it that is important. Using a separate phone is certainly a good way of maintaining a healthy separation between your life. At the very least it avoids those issues where people have facebook or other social media set up to find contacts in their phone. | |||
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"I think it's quite sad not to be able to trust anybody but I do believe we should all exercise caution and understand not everybody tells the truth. I also don't think we should assume everybody is lying there are ways of finding out what you need to know and we all have our own ways of deciding what is true and not. " I agree its a sorry state of affairs that we live inna society where being truthful is almost seen as a vulnerability. Everyone distorts the truth, from the size of chocolate bars through to politicians and those that are meant to display exemplary behaviour. We use the excuse that we lie to protect others feelings, or to protect ourselves. We call trusting people naive and scoff at their innocence instead of mourning the fact that we no longer tell the truth. I try to see the good in people, and always say I wait to be surprised by their behaviour but rarely am! | |||
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"So... I've got my face out. But I'm a bit contradictory in that in a decade of being on here, a handful know my full name. Three people know my address. One being my fiancé. A few know about work. Social media profiles? Erm... well a couple know about the Twitter/sex blog side of stuff because that's how I've connected with them at first. I've got a separate email account for anything related to this stuff. Mainly because I've got several email addresses and like keeping things nice and organised and simple to find. I think I'm trusting of people up to a certain point and then it takes me a lot to open up further with someone. Which is fine really. I don't really care if people try to use it against me to be honest. Nothing to be ashamed about. Nothing I can get in "trouble" for. I'm just quite a cautious person. And contradictory. ![]() Cautious and contradictory isn’t a bad thing. Is that more self preservation or more you lrefer to talk about others than yourself? Some people just won’t open up not because they are private, they just assume others won’t be interested in them. | |||
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"Overall I'm quite secretive. There's only a handful of people who know my real name and have my phone number. I'd never have anyone to my home address no matter how long I've known them for. I give a little trust but not naive to give my whole world away to someone who could be fooling me about theirs." Are you secretive because you are afraid of what they could do to expose or hurt you, or just see no need go over share with people you may only see once or twice? You mention that they could be fooling you, so do you tale what they say to you with a massive pinch of salt? | |||
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"Only thing I'll share is my phone number and real names, my phone number isn't linked to anything and the block button is easy. We do tend to use telegram more these days. I don't discuss where we live, occupation or anything with people, generally because it's boring and no one's business. Mrs " Are you using telegram more because others are, or to help protect your privacy? | |||
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"We share pretty much fuck all with people we meet at clubs, even less with those we chat with on here. Nobody needs to know. We're not looking for life long friends, just casual fun on rare occasions. There are a few people we've got to know well over the years that we're proper friends with now, who know what we do for a living and what we get up to via vanilla social media. But I can probably count those on two hands. People will naturally ask questions both online or face to face. But it's easy to be vague and also simple (and in no way rude) to decline an answer. A" But do you do that intentionally to protect your privacy, or more a case of no need to over share with people we may not see or speak to again? Some people are quite free with offering up personal details without ever really realising. . I had to point out to one person we were talking to that the photo they sent us contained a letter in the background that had their full name and postal address, while another had their name and date of birth. | |||
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"As in real life , don't trust anyone until you've actually spoken to them in person" I still wouldn't trust them. | |||
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"With my double trauma, I trust no-one completely. My BPD side doesn't really care. The rest of my neurodivergent brain thinks...if I'm not harming, myself or others, physically or psychologically what exactly is the problem. People do establish friendships from Fab and I have a separate phone. Having been (being) crazy myself, I now know the signs that someone is probably a bit unstable. However, I judge by how they handle that instability. I know the work it takes to keep stable so when I see others trying, I let them have that. I let people know about my crazy and it's up to them to decide if they are comfortable with my level of crazy. That said I have a separate phone. My company has a very tight internet policy so I can't say the company name publically online but the company can't police who sees me and who talks to me in person. And any workplace harassment, I will be going straight to the police. I'm entitled to my personal life off duty. I think we all have the capability, if not the capacity, to be a little crazy at times. As you say its how we deal with it that is important. Using a separate phone is certainly a good way of maintaining a healthy separation between your life. At the very least it avoids those issues where people have facebook or other social media set up to find contacts in their phone." To be fair I think most people don't realise that apps such as Facebook actively trawl through contacts etc to try and link people. ![]() | |||
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"Fresh off the married thread, how trusting are you of people you meet on here? Do you share real names, home addresses, social media profiles, phone numbers, email addresses, where you work, what you do etc.? If so how soon after talking? Are you ever afraid that someone could use that information against you? If so how do you protect yourself? Meet at clubs/hotels only, use a burner phone/email address, use fake names, never divulge more than you need to? . I admit to being a bit daft when we started and having people over to the house without meeting for a social first, sharing phone numbers to chat (not using telegram like we do now) There are a few people who know what I do for a living, as well as where I work, but not many. I’m fairly open about my life to some of my friends, and my family (those that are alive) likely wouldn’t care. My job… it may get interesting… but no more so than anyone else's. I don’t work in a reportable profession. We have no kids to worry about gossip at the school gates. . So how trusting are you, or how do you protect yourself?" I’m ridiculously trusting | |||
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"I share very little - but I'm also a very private person in my non-fab life! " This ![]() | |||
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"I share very little - but I'm also a very private person in my non-fab life! " I share too much after a few ![]() ![]() ![]() | |||
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"I share very little - but I'm also a very private person in my non-fab life! I share too much after a few ![]() ![]() ![]() You make me laugh ![]() | |||
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"I do with people that I’ve met or I build that trust with through private chats. If people ask questions I’m generally happy to answer. I know someone locally on here who is quite open about her situation and people take liberties (messaging her husband, stopping her when our with her kids etc) Messaging her husband about what she is up to? I assume he knows? Taking liberties with people, just because they may overshare is not okay. It smacks of entitled behaviour." Yeah she has a solo profile and they have a couples profile on here. He’s fully aware and that’s the weird part. Shows what you get from people when they don’t get their own way ![]() | |||
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"The people that do have my real name still called me Lorna anyway so it's kind of pointless. ![]() Like me! I can't help it. I call all my mates by their fab names ![]() | |||
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"The people that do have my real name still called me Lorna anyway so it's kind of pointless. ![]() ![]() You were one of the people I was thinking of but there are many more. ![]() | |||
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"I share very little - but I'm also a very private person in my non-fab life! I share too much after a few ![]() ![]() ![]() Guilty of this too! ![]() | |||
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"Do you know what I find a bit weird though? Whenever there's a thread about needing a connection, I always feel like the odd one out as everyone says yeah there has to be a really strong 'connection', whereas I'm good with not hating their company and fancying them. Yet on this thread I'm saying yeah I'm fine with sharing and getting to know each other and most are like 'fuck dat, I'm not telling them my name!' Fab's a fickle beast ![]() I like to have a connection but that doesn't mean they have to know my real name. To me a connection is a feeling, my name is just a simple fact. Feelings are what matters more to me, as in the feeling of chemistry, lust and horniness. | |||
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"My pics etc are public and I've never had an issue until today. Been a member off and on (mainly on) since 2008. 3 exes know I'm on here, 2 speak with me on here, both still comment on my decent rack. The other wouldn't bother. Apart from that, in all that time I've had 2 guys from the next village see me on here, get blocked on here THEN tracked me down on the face thing Today I wake up to a messenger text from a guy I know ish (did some work for mum in the summer). Wanting to meet as he'd broken up with his partner - then got real nasty when I said no. I'll be honest, it's rattled me a little " That's bad news. Once people know any of your real details its scarily easy to join the dots and find out more. ![]() | |||
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"Fresh off the married thread, how trusting are you of people you meet on here? Do you share real names, home addresses, social media profiles, phone numbers, email addresses, where you work, what you do etc.? If so how soon after talking? Are you ever afraid that someone could use that information against you? If so how do you protect yourself? Meet at clubs/hotels only, use a burner phone/email address, use fake names, never divulge more than you need to? . I admit to being a bit daft when we started and having people over to the house without meeting for a social first, sharing phone numbers to chat (not using telegram like we do now) There are a few people who know what I do for a living, as well as where I work, but not many. I’m fairly open about my life to some of my friends, and my family (those that are alive) likely wouldn’t care. My job… it may get interesting… but no more so than anyone else's. I don’t work in a reportable profession. We have no kids to worry about gossip at the school gates. . So how trusting are you, or how do you protect yourself?" That’s a really good question and one that Has many different answer. One half of me wants to say from a philosophical point the people you should trust least are the people you trust the most, they tend to do you more harm and lasting hurt where on here people are strangers so know very little on how they could cause you issues or have the interest too. However the reality is there are scammers, stalkers etc and so my approach with sharing info is on a quid pro quo basis. I have been asked for a picture of me in my first message if they’ve not got one on their profile. I won’t give out any personal contact details on request unless provided first. You have to build trust, which people forget on here. Mutual interest and willingness to invite each other into each other’s lives to what ever degree your both happy with. However most demand all these things without first doing that and so in those instances, go with your gut and end contact with them ![]() | |||
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