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"Most of the time the people these are aimed at have so little self awareness that they assume it is aimed at others and so pay no notice." This In my layman's opinion, the best way to combat these things is to call out people you know when they behave like this. It's going to have much more impact coming from people you know than it will from a faceless advert. Although I suppose the point then is to make the already sensible ones more like to call out their mates... LvM | |||
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"Most of the time the people these are aimed at have so little self awareness that they assume it is aimed at others and so pay no notice. This In my layman's opinion, the best way to combat these things is to call out people you know when they behave like this. It's going to have much more impact coming from people you know than it will from a faceless advert. Although I suppose the point then is to make the already sensible ones more like to call out their mates... LvM" We've spoken about this about a specific friend. They don't like being called out regarding the odd "lads down the pub" sort of comment, but hopefully, they begin to realise it's not on, agreed though, this is the most obvious way of stopping it | |||
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"Think I’ve seen this on tv. To me the point seems less directed to the perpetrators than those around them, to raise awareness to say it when you see it. This doesn’t need to rely on police, just ordinary people speaking up saying it’s unacceptable. Young men in particular are very sensitive to the opinions of their mates and if they are calling out this crap then they’re more likely to see their own behaviour for what it is. " I agree - it is how I saw the ad and I also thought it should be not just focused on women but on anybody who is at risk of being bullied/ threatened etc. Perhaps I missed something in the ad but I think it was only about behaviour towards women, wasn't it? | |||
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"Think I’ve seen this on tv. To me the point seems less directed to the perpetrators than those around them, to raise awareness to say it when you see it. This doesn’t need to rely on police, just ordinary people speaking up saying it’s unacceptable. Young men in particular are very sensitive to the opinions of their mates and if they are calling out this crap then they’re more likely to see their own behaviour for what it is. I agree - it is how I saw the ad and I also thought it should be not just focused on women but on anybody who is at risk of being bullied/ threatened etc. Perhaps I missed something in the ad but I think it was only about behaviour towards women, wasn't it? " Yes it only depicted women but I think that’s a smart approach by directing it to a group the target audience can readily identify with. The rising tide floats all boats. I’d also argue that challenging this treatment of women does actually help other groups, as (in my experience at least) it is women who are quickest to call out targeting other groups. | |||
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"Most of the time the people these are aimed at have so little self awareness that they assume it is aimed at others and so pay no notice. This In my layman's opinion, the best way to combat these things is to call out people you know when they behave like this. It's going to have much more impact coming from people you know than it will from a faceless advert. Although I suppose the point then is to make the already sensible ones more like to call out their mates... LvM" That's what the TV advert shows... | |||
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"Think I’ve seen this on tv. To me the point seems less directed to the perpetrators than those around them, to raise awareness to say it when you see it. This doesn’t need to rely on police, just ordinary people speaking up saying it’s unacceptable. Young men in particular are very sensitive to the opinions of their mates and if they are calling out this crap then they’re more likely to see their own behaviour for what it is. " However the really sexist racist people would likely just punch someone who told them their behaviour is unacceptable. | |||
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"Think I’ve seen this on tv. To me the point seems less directed to the perpetrators than those around them, to raise awareness to say it when you see it. This doesn’t need to rely on police, just ordinary people speaking up saying it’s unacceptable. Young men in particular are very sensitive to the opinions of their mates and if they are calling out this crap then they’re more likely to see their own behaviour for what it is. However the really sexist racist people would likely just punch someone who told them their behaviour is unacceptable. " Agree entirely. But the campaign is targeting a lower more insidious level of aggressions. The ones which create the environment for that punch. | |||
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"Most of the time the people these are aimed at have so little self awareness that they assume it is aimed at others and so pay no notice. This In my layman's opinion, the best way to combat these things is to call out people you know when they behave like this. It's going to have much more impact coming from people you know than it will from a faceless advert. Although I suppose the point then is to make the already sensible ones more like to call out their mates... LvM" But, using these very forums as an example, and specifically the countless threads objectifying female politicians, calling this behaviour out is futile. You're a killjoy, you've got no sense of humour or you are virtue signalling the minute you say this crap is not okay. People genuinely believe its acceptable. And genuinely seem to think the ones with the problem are those saying it is not okay. Amd I'm pretty sure that's across society not just these forums | |||
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"Most of the time the people these are aimed at have so little self awareness that they assume it is aimed at others and so pay no notice. This In my layman's opinion, the best way to combat these things is to call out people you know when they behave like this. It's going to have much more impact coming from people you know than it will from a faceless advert. Although I suppose the point then is to make the already sensible ones more like to call out their mates... LvM But, using these very forums as an example, and specifically the countless threads objectifying female politicians, calling this behaviour out is futile. You're a killjoy, you've got no sense of humour or you are virtue signalling the minute you say this crap is not okay. People genuinely believe its acceptable. And genuinely seem to think the ones with the problem are those saying it is not okay. Amd I'm pretty sure that's across society not just these forums" It’s difficult sometimes though as a lot of the time it’s sarcasm/regular forumites taking the piss who some know they are but others may not. So jumping on someone often makes the person calling them out look silly. With regards to the Liz Truss etc posts though I totally agree with you. They were awful. | |||
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"Most of the time the people these are aimed at have so little self awareness that they assume it is aimed at others and so pay no notice. This In my layman's opinion, the best way to combat these things is to call out people you know when they behave like this. It's going to have much more impact coming from people you know than it will from a faceless advert. Although I suppose the point then is to make the already sensible ones more like to call out their mates... LvM But, using these very forums as an example, and specifically the countless threads objectifying female politicians, calling this behaviour out is futile. You're a killjoy, you've got no sense of humour or you are virtue signalling the minute you say this crap is not okay. People genuinely believe its acceptable. And genuinely seem to think the ones with the problem are those saying it is not okay. Amd I'm pretty sure that's across society not just these forums It’s difficult sometimes though as a lot of the time it’s sarcasm/regular forumites taking the piss who some know they are but others may not. So jumping on someone often makes the person calling them out look silly. With regards to the Liz Truss etc posts though I totally agree with you. They were awful. " Whats the difference between saying you'd love to shag liz truss or that she has great tits, and saying youd love to shag someone else on fab? Because the latter appears to be acceptable but not the former? | |||
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"It's the first time I've seen or heard any efforts to improve those behaviours. So thought it's a step in the right direction. " The mayor of London did this. Saw it at a tube station and thought it was good. https://youtu.be/qbk3iJqmjNU | |||
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"Most of the time the people these are aimed at have so little self awareness that they assume it is aimed at others and so pay no notice. This In my layman's opinion, the best way to combat these things is to call out people you know when they behave like this. It's going to have much more impact coming from people you know than it will from a faceless advert. Although I suppose the point then is to make the already sensible ones more like to call out their mates... LvM But, using these very forums as an example, and specifically the countless threads objectifying female politicians, calling this behaviour out is futile. You're a killjoy, you've got no sense of humour or you are virtue signalling the minute you say this crap is not okay. People genuinely believe its acceptable. And genuinely seem to think the ones with the problem are those saying it is not okay. Amd I'm pretty sure that's across society not just these forums It’s difficult sometimes though as a lot of the time it’s sarcasm/regular forumites taking the piss who some know they are but others may not. So jumping on someone often makes the person calling them out look silly. With regards to the Liz Truss etc posts though I totally agree with you. They were awful. Whats the difference between saying you'd love to shag liz truss or that she has great tits, and saying youd love to shag someone else on fab? Because the latter appears to be acceptable but not the former? " Consent? The fact that starting a random thread discussing someones great tits and discussing how filthy they are and how uoud like to fuck them would be as creepy as fuck but that on a flirtatious thread it is limited to those who have opted in and to an extent at least the comments are fair game. Or the fact that the comments directed at forumites are way less graphic? Or that it's really not okay to messages a random profile with unsolicited vulgar comments just because they are on a swingers site Oh and if that's not enouhh, maybe the fact thst the threads about Liz Truss are often littered with men discussing using sex as violence. | |||
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"Most of the time the people these are aimed at have so little self awareness that they assume it is aimed at others and so pay no notice. This In my layman's opinion, the best way to combat these things is to call out people you know when they behave like this. It's going to have much more impact coming from people you know than it will from a faceless advert. Although I suppose the point then is to make the already sensible ones more like to call out their mates... LvM But, using these very forums as an example, and specifically the countless threads objectifying female politicians, calling this behaviour out is futile. You're a killjoy, you've got no sense of humour or you are virtue signalling the minute you say this crap is not okay. People genuinely believe its acceptable. And genuinely seem to think the ones with the problem are those saying it is not okay. Amd I'm pretty sure that's across society not just these forums It’s difficult sometimes though as a lot of the time it’s sarcasm/regular forumites taking the piss who some know they are but others may not. So jumping on someone often makes the person calling them out look silly. With regards to the Liz Truss etc posts though I totally agree with you. They were awful. Whats the difference between saying you'd love to shag liz truss or that she has great tits, and saying youd love to shag someone else on fab? Because the latter appears to be acceptable but not the former? Consent? The fact that starting a random thread discussing someones great tits and discussing how filthy they are and how uoud like to fuck them would be as creepy as fuck but that on a flirtatious thread it is limited to those who have opted in and to an extent at least the comments are fair game. Or the fact that the comments directed at forumites are way less graphic? Or that it's really not okay to messages a random profile with unsolicited vulgar comments just because they are on a swingers site Oh and if that's not enouhh, maybe the fact thst the threads about Liz Truss are often littered with men discussing using sex as violence." Never seen the violent sex bit i have to say. Fair enough if that is the case. What has messaging random profile on here got to do with liz truss? We'll have to disagree on the bit that comments about people in here are less graphic than liz truss (any violent ones excluded) , ive seen lots of graphic comments from men about women in here, and lots vice versa also | |||
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"Most of the time the people these are aimed at have so little self awareness that they assume it is aimed at others and so pay no notice. This In my layman's opinion, the best way to combat these things is to call out people you know when they behave like this. It's going to have much more impact coming from people you know than it will from a faceless advert. Although I suppose the point then is to make the already sensible ones more like to call out their mates... LvM But, using these very forums as an example, and specifically the countless threads objectifying female politicians, calling this behaviour out is futile. You're a killjoy, you've got no sense of humour or you are virtue signalling the minute you say this crap is not okay. People genuinely believe its acceptable. And genuinely seem to think the ones with the problem are those saying it is not okay. Amd I'm pretty sure that's across society not just these forums It’s difficult sometimes though as a lot of the time it’s sarcasm/regular forumites taking the piss who some know they are but others may not. So jumping on someone often makes the person calling them out look silly. With regards to the Liz Truss etc posts though I totally agree with you. They were awful. Whats the difference between saying you'd love to shag liz truss or that she has great tits, and saying youd love to shag someone else on fab? Because the latter appears to be acceptable but not the former? " For me personally the thread was started about her and it was derogatory. If a thread was started about me or any other person on fab I’d feel the same. | |||
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"Most of the time the people these are aimed at have so little self awareness that they assume it is aimed at others and so pay no notice. This In my layman's opinion, the best way to combat these things is to call out people you know when they behave like this. It's going to have much more impact coming from people you know than it will from a faceless advert. Although I suppose the point then is to make the already sensible ones more like to call out their mates... LvM But, using these very forums as an example, and specifically the countless threads objectifying female politicians, calling this behaviour out is futile. You're a killjoy, you've got no sense of humour or you are virtue signalling the minute you say this crap is not okay. People genuinely believe its acceptable. And genuinely seem to think the ones with the problem are those saying it is not okay. Amd I'm pretty sure that's across society not just these forums It’s difficult sometimes though as a lot of the time it’s sarcasm/regular forumites taking the piss who some know they are but others may not. So jumping on someone often makes the person calling them out look silly. With regards to the Liz Truss etc posts though I totally agree with you. They were awful. Whats the difference between saying you'd love to shag liz truss or that she has great tits, and saying youd love to shag someone else on fab? Because the latter appears to be acceptable but not the former? Consent? The fact that starting a random thread discussing someones great tits and discussing how filthy they are and how uoud like to fuck them would be as creepy as fuck but that on a flirtatious thread it is limited to those who have opted in and to an extent at least the comments are fair game. Or the fact that the comments directed at forumites are way less graphic? Or that it's really not okay to messages a random profile with unsolicited vulgar comments just because they are on a swingers site Oh and if that's not enouhh, maybe the fact thst the threads about Liz Truss are often littered with men discussing using sex as violence. Never seen the violent sex bit i have to say. Fair enough if that is the case. What has messaging random profile on here got to do with liz truss? We'll have to disagree on the bit that comments about people in here are less graphic than liz truss (any violent ones excluded) , ive seen lots of graphic comments from men about women in here, and lots vice versa also" “I’d Fuck her up the arse like she’s fucking us all up the arse” Ok then. | |||
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"Most of the time the people these are aimed at have so little self awareness that they assume it is aimed at others and so pay no notice. This In my layman's opinion, the best way to combat these things is to call out people you know when they behave like this. It's going to have much more impact coming from people you know than it will from a faceless advert. Although I suppose the point then is to make the already sensible ones more like to call out their mates... LvM But, using these very forums as an example, and specifically the countless threads objectifying female politicians, calling this behaviour out is futile. You're a killjoy, you've got no sense of humour or you are virtue signalling the minute you say this crap is not okay. People genuinely believe its acceptable. And genuinely seem to think the ones with the problem are those saying it is not okay. Amd I'm pretty sure that's across society not just these forums It’s difficult sometimes though as a lot of the time it’s sarcasm/regular forumites taking the piss who some know they are but others may not. So jumping on someone often makes the person calling them out look silly. With regards to the Liz Truss etc posts though I totally agree with you. They were awful. Whats the difference between saying you'd love to shag liz truss or that she has great tits, and saying youd love to shag someone else on fab? Because the latter appears to be acceptable but not the former? Consent? The fact that starting a random thread discussing someones great tits and discussing how filthy they are and how uoud like to fuck them would be as creepy as fuck but that on a flirtatious thread it is limited to those who have opted in and to an extent at least the comments are fair game. Or the fact that the comments directed at forumites are way less graphic? Or that it's really not okay to messages a random profile with unsolicited vulgar comments just because they are on a swingers site Oh and if that's not enouhh, maybe the fact thst the threads about Liz Truss are often littered with men discussing using sex as violence. Never seen the violent sex bit i have to say. Fair enough if that is the case. What has messaging random profile on here got to do with liz truss? We'll have to disagree on the bit that comments about people in here are less graphic than liz truss (any violent ones excluded) , ive seen lots of graphic comments from men about women in here, and lots vice versa also" "I'd fuck her up the arse" you're goubg to tell me that's not sexual violence when used in the context of assuming she wouldn't enjoy it aren't you? Because that's a common one. There is a recurring theme of degradation and punishment in the suggestions of how people want to fuck her. There is a post on a thread at the moment suggesting she sold be subjected to a 1000 person bukkake. It's abhorrent and its really scary and it all starts with the simple abd completeky unnecessary question 'would you fuck Liz Truss' And the mem that picture this crap, will defend it as jokes and banter but it demonstrates how they view women, how they view sex. It's like Jay Inbetweener on steroids 'she'd get it' only mit an adolescent virgin but grown men. And this is the culture we are in and thos campaign will hopefully challenge thongs even if it achieves lute in the short term | |||
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"Every time one of these threads starts someone is accused of whataboutery without considering how valid it often is. I've seen a member of staff called out by a male colleague for inappropriate comments to a female workmate. As his line manager I disciplined him and got headbutted for my trouble before he played the MH card and went on the sick to avoid further punishment. Around the same time a woman in the office used to make crude suggestions to the young lads in the warehouse and wolf whistle from the office window. Two of the young men complained and she was politely told to stop by the office manager. The staff wanted to know why she wasn't put through the same disciplinary procedure and the response was that the external HR advisors had suggested she might feel she was being victimised and it was just friendly banter. The whataboutery part of this story is that as a result the 40+ warehouse staff including 4 women said they would not be calling anyone out for inappropriate behaviour ever again because there wasn't a balanced approach to discipline and punishment across the board. That's one example of the domino effect of whataboutery. There are many more. " So it's a woman's fault that other women aren't protected from men... | |||
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"Every time one of these threads starts someone is accused of whataboutery without considering how valid it often is. I've seen a member of staff called out by a male colleague for inappropriate comments to a female workmate. As his line manager I disciplined him and got headbutted for my trouble before he played the MH card and went on the sick to avoid further punishment. Around the same time a woman in the office used to make crude suggestions to the young lads in the warehouse and wolf whistle from the office window. Two of the young men complained and she was politely told to stop by the office manager. The staff wanted to know why she wasn't put through the same disciplinary procedure and the response was that the external HR advisors had suggested she might feel she was being victimised and it was just friendly banter. The whataboutery part of this story is that as a result the 40+ warehouse staff including 4 women said they would not be calling anyone out for inappropriate behaviour ever again because there wasn't a balanced approach to discipline and punishment across the board. That's one example of the domino effect of whataboutery. There are many more. So it's a woman's fault that other women aren't protected from men... " Where did you take that from? As I said that was one example and in that case the failure to give equal validity to each complaint had a knock on effect within that particular environment. | |||
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"Think I’ve seen this on tv. To me the point seems less directed to the perpetrators than those around them, to raise awareness to say it when you see it. This doesn’t need to rely on police, just ordinary people speaking up saying it’s unacceptable. Young men in particular are very sensitive to the opinions of their mates and if they are calling out this crap then they’re more likely to see their own behaviour for what it is. However the really sexist racist people would likely just punch someone who told them their behaviour is unacceptable. Agree entirely. But the campaign is targeting a lower more insidious level of aggressions. The ones which create the environment for that punch. " Fair point. I do like the adverts. They should do one with the diet man. | |||
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