FabSwingers.com forum: HIV

By *lder A Wiser Passion OP Woman
over a year ago

morecambe

Would you swing with a swinger who said they were just before you was going to have sex with them they were HIV POSS. I know I wouldnt I report them to Admin

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

What's it got to do with admin?

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By *lder A Wiser Passion OP Woman
over a year ago

morecambe

"What's it got to do with admin? "
Cos if the person was on here they need to know to banned them to make sure their swingers on here were safe

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"What's it got to do with admin? "

I was wondering this.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No I wouldn't but I wouldn't report them either. That sort of thing is private x

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By *oldswarriorMan
over a year ago

Falkirk

It has nothing to do with fab.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"What's it got to do with admin? Cos if the person was on here they need to know to banned them to make sure their swingers on here were safe"

What a ludicrous answer!

NBVN x

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By *ittyandtheboyCouple
over a year ago

Back of the bins.

"Would you swing with a swinger who said they were just before you was going to have sex with them they were HIV POSS. I know I wouldnt I report them to Admin"

What if they’re on treatment and undetectable therefore in transmittable?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Is it Saturday night already?

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By *ohn KanakaMan
over a year ago

Not all that North of North London

"What's it got to do with admin? Cos if the person was on here they need to know to banned them to make sure their swingers on here were safe"

But he told you and let you make am informed decision? So I'm not sure how people need keeping safe.

I do think it's a bit crap he told you late on but he still told you

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By *vgloryholebs16TV/TS
over a year ago

Bristol.

"Would you swing with a swinger who said they were just before you was going to have sex with them they were HIV POSS. I know I wouldnt I report them to Admin"

You may have had ( safer) sex with a few people who are hiv+ without even realising it..

I think it would be extremely unusual for anyone to announce that just before having sex...

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By *oo..Woman
over a year ago

Boo's World

"What's it got to do with admin? Cos if the person was on here they need to know to banned them to make sure their swingers on here were safe"

No, what you should be doing is having an adult discussion with the person involved and if you wanted to take things further (which you don't) it would of been around the course of action required to have the appropriate protection required for sexual encounters.

Telling Admin they shouldn't be on here is ridiculous.

I personally wouldn't sleep with someone with HIV, that's my right to do so. But I'd politely decline to the person involved and that literally would be the end of the scenario for me.

Like an adult should do

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Would you swing with a swinger who said they were just before you was going to have sex with them they were HIV POSS. I know I wouldnt I report them to Admin

What if they’re on treatment and undetectable therefore in transmittable? "

Btw I know it's off topic but just wanted to say Happy Anniversary x

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By *iscean_dreamMan
over a year ago

Llanelli

No I wouldn't sleep with them but I wouldn't report them either because if they're being honest then it's peoples choice to sleep with them or not at their own risk

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By *avexxMan
over a year ago

cheshire

hes told you before sex, would be then your choice..

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

"What's it got to do with admin? Cos if the person was on here they need to know to banned them to make sure their swingers on here were safe"

Why should they ban them?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Is this a hypothetical or did it happen?

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By *icolerobbieCouple
over a year ago

walsall

"hes told you before sex, would be then your choice.."

Maybe nicer to be told a fair bit before then perhaps?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

OP your post comes across as lacking a lot of knowledge and is missing a hell of a lot of context.

Are you saying this has happened to you?

For example -

Between the three studies, no transmission of HIV from a sexual partner with an undetectable viral load was seen in nearly 130,000 acts of condomless penetrative sex. This means the risk of transmission by a partner with an undetectable viral load is statistically equivalent to zero.

So context is everything.

Those with HIV in the western hemisphere take a tablet a day and live a normal life with the same life expectancy as HIV negative people. Also as highlighted above when their virus load is Undetectable (due to the prep treatment) then essentially it's impossible for them to pass the virus to anybody else.

Some people still thing of HIV in the context of the late 80/90s which can continue the stigma and is very damaging sadly. The truth is new infection rates in the UK are very low and dropping year on year especially since effective treatment has been in place.

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

"What's it got to do with admin? Cos if the person was on here they need to know to banned them to make sure their swingers on here were safe"

Stigma is one reason why people don't test, spread unknowingly, and leads to worse health outcomes for themselves and those they infect.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Absolutely nothing to do with admin, and if they hadn't disclosed it you wouldn't have even known? It's on ourselves to do our own personal risk assessment each and every time we choose to have sex with someone else. Personally I always ask if someone has had recent sti tests, and offer up proof of my own, and I'm still generally a safe sex individual

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By *angerous123Man
over a year ago

Leeds

Back to the 80s....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

And this is why stigma is still an issue around HIV.

If they are positive on treatment they are no risk to you even if you had a condom split. I would be more concerned about the people who are unaware of their HIV status if I was you.

Report them to admin for what? Being open and honest?

It must have been so difficult to tell you in the first place snd you repay that respect with this kind of attitude- shame on you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

https://sh24.org.uk/

Since it's the topic....

Great service via the NHS for home testing

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By *ittleMissCaliWoman
over a year ago

all loved up

"Would you swing with a swinger who said they were just before you was going to have sex with them they were HIV POSS. I know I wouldnt I report them to Admin"
I wouldn't continue but why would I report them... they have done nothing wrong x

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By *ucka39Man
over a year ago

Newcastle

"Would you swing with a swinger who said they were just before you was going to have sex with them they were HIV POSS. I know I wouldnt I report them to Admin

You may have had ( safer) sex with a few people who are hiv+ without even realising it..

I think it would be extremely unusual for anyone to announce that just before having sex..."

Totally agree with this

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"And this is why stigma is still an issue around HIV.

If they are positive on treatment they are no risk to you even if you had a condom split. I would be more concerned about the people who are unaware of their HIV status if I was you.

Report them to admin for what? Being open and honest?

It must have been so difficult to tell you in the first place snd you repay that respect with this kind of attitude- shame on you "

Wholeheartedly agree with this

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"And this is why stigma is still an issue around HIV.

If they are positive on treatment they are no risk to you even if you had a condom split. I would be more concerned about the people who are unaware of their HIV status if I was you.

Report them to admin for what? Being open and honest?

It must have been so difficult to tell you in the first place snd you repay that respect with this kind of attitude- shame on you "

Exactly its 100% safe to have bareback sex with someone who is HIV poative but undectable and are open / honest about thier status as opposed to going bareback with a random swinger who has no idea of thier HIV status.

When I read these threads I dispair sometimes. As _naswingdress it's the stigma driven by a lack of upto date knowledge that leads to people not testing and knowing thier status and subsequently infecting others.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"And this is why stigma is still an issue around HIV.

If they are positive on treatment they are no risk to you even if you had a condom split. I would be more concerned about the people who are unaware of their HIV status if I was you.

Report them to admin for what? Being open and honest?

It must have been so difficult to tell you in the first place snd you repay that respect with this kind of attitude- shame on you

KJ "

100% safe only in the context of HIV transmission in that example obviously there are many other stis.

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By *inaTitzTV/TS
over a year ago

Titz Towers, North Notts

Starts setting up a popcorn concession

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By *1876Man
over a year ago

Dudley

"hes told you before sex, would be then your choice..

Maybe nicer to be told a fair bit before then perhaps?"

Definitely

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"And this is why stigma is still an issue around HIV.

If they are positive on treatment they are no risk to you even if you had a condom split. I would be more concerned about the people who are unaware of their HIV status if I was you.

Report them to admin for what? Being open and honest?

It must have been so difficult to tell you in the first place snd you repay that respect with this kind of attitude- shame on you

KJ "

I dispair too, hopefully we can educate people and make a difference x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Starts setting up a popcorn concession

Haha me too - I rarely comment but feel so strongly about this topic x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Na id not fuck them without 2 coats of ronseal damp seal so double the chance to wash away the bugs

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you’re worried, simply don’t play (no need 4 drama).

Also, make sure they use a condom the right way every time you have sex with lubricant to help prevent condom from breaking or slipping during sex.

I get myself tested regularly and always open & honest with every1 when asked about my health. Risk of catching STI’s/STD’s is always present if unlucky but it can be considerably reduced with protection.

In last 6 years of playing with plenty BB sex, I’ve been unfortunate to have caught Chlamydia (only the once) which I advertised on Fabs. for all to see. Treated with meds. & got myself retested to make sure all clear of symptoms b4 I resumed play again.

HIV is not the end of the World, modern medicine has moved on...!

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By *iss KinkWoman
over a year ago

North West

"What's it got to do with admin? Cos if the person was on here they need to know to banned them to make sure their swingers on here were safe"

I’m struggling to see why you would want them banned

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"What's it got to do with admin? Cos if the person was on here they need to know to banned them to make sure their swingers on here were safe"

The only way to be 100% 'safe' from sti's is to be celibate. Other than that all anyone can do is reduce their personal risk as much as they can

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By *iltsTSgirlTV/TS
over a year ago

chichester

lol what an idiotic thing to say about banning them ... jeez some people are so dumb its shocking in this day and age

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By *illingToHelpMan
over a year ago

Oldham or South Shore

Sooooo happy to see that some people are up-to-date with their HIV knowledge. It’s just so well known and general knowledge in the gay world that it’s actually quite shocking to read some people’s outdated and incredibly wrong opinions on here.

Just for clarity, if someone is HIV+ and on treatment, you CANNOT catch HIV from them. They are, LITERALLY, the safest person to have sex with. Not just for the fact that they cannot…. Repeat… cannot pass HIV on to you, but also, that person will also be receiving very regular STI checks and having general medical health checks, too.

If anyone needs to know more, pleeeeeeeease message me. Knowledge is power.

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By *issmorganWoman
over a year ago

Calderdale innit

I wouldn't sleep with them & yes I

would think they should have brought this up much sooner than when things were going further.

I wouldn't report them though,but would advise them to tell other potential meets early on.

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By *1876Man
over a year ago

Dudley

"I wouldn't sleep with them & yes I

would think they should have brought this up much sooner than when things were going further.

I wouldn't report them though,but would advise them to tell other potential meets early on."

Spot on...fair and sensible in every way

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By *ittleMissCaliWoman
over a year ago

all loved up

"Sooooo happy to see that some people are up-to-date with their HIV knowledge. It’s just so well known and general knowledge in the gay world that it’s actually quite shocking to read some people’s outdated and incredibly wrong opinions on here.

If anyone needs to know more, pleeeeeeeease message me. Knowledge is power."

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By *elsh_naturist_coupleCouple
over a year ago

Newport

"Would you swing with a swinger who said they were just before you was going to have sex with them they were HIV POSS. I know I wouldnt I report them to Admin

What if they’re on treatment and undetectable therefore in transmittable? "

Spot on!

It's not the 1980's it's not the death sentence it use to be!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Would you swing with a swinger who said they were just before you was going to have sex with them they were HIV POSS. I know I wouldnt I report them to Admin"

If this is a real situation.

The person probably wanted to get to know you before they discussed something so personal with you.

You making this post has proven how much lack of knowledge you have about it and why he didn't tell you straight away.

Reporting to Admin why?

We're all consulting adults most of us do regular health screening.

You should really educate yourself on the matter.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If anyone needs to know more, pleeeeeeeease message me. Knowledge is power.

At last somebody who takes actual upto date facts into consideration.

Sadly the amount of posting I wouldn't sleep with them is bonkers yet read there profiles and veris and the fact is they are clearly taking far greater risks

HIV Undetectable = Untransmittable (U=U). Look it up in terms of not wanting HIV they are as the poster above posted the safest option.

Sadly the stigma of the 80/90s is still around even now in the 20s. All that ignorance and stigma does is make wrongly feel shame, hide from testing and in turn put people at risk.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"lol what an idiotic thing to say about banning them ... jeez some people are so dumb its shocking in this day and age

That’s harsh. OP needs some kudos for asking questions and wanting to learn. I think it’s a real shame you’ve shot them down like this.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Would you swing with a swinger who said they were just before you was going to have sex with them they were HIV POSS. I know I wouldnt I report them to Admin"

Was you going to have unprotected sex with him ???

Bit ludicrous to have him banned

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"lol what an idiotic thing to say about banning them ... jeez some people are so dumb its shocking in this day and age

That’s harsh. OP needs some kudos for asking questions and wanting to learn. I think it’s a real shame you’ve shot them down like this."

If they had just asked the question they would have gotten a different response. I think it was the “I would report them and get them banned” that has elicited this response

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If they had just asked the question they would have gotten a different response. I think it was the “I would report them and get them banned” that has elicited this response "

Of course, but you think it, you don’t type it out - ‘idiotic’. That doesn’t help anyone. OP must have a pretty good idea from the 20 or so other previous posters that reporting wasn’t the best course of action, and it won’t affect the other party, they won’t be banned for being HIV+ and being honest about it. So isn’t this more about educating and informing a fellow formumite, rather than making them feel like a prize twat?

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By *MabzeroMan
over a year ago

Mid-Ulster

It was interesting to realise that my attitude to HIV was from the Eighties.

And also to see all the positive information.

One other thing relating directly to the OP's comment is that there's nothing really preventing people signing up again under a different profile, so a ban might be pointless anyway.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Someone told me after the fact 2 years ago they were positive.

I didn't really know anything about it and undetectable viral loads etc at that time and lost my mind for a week or two, didn't help I flew back to Greece the next day.

Anyway I was back after two days and got tested and educated myself and put on prep and is all fine. But I understand ops comment to report. Nothing wrong really on guysbpart but timing.

Speak go to you local clinic who can give you advice.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It was interesting to realise that my attitude to HIV was from the Eighties.

And also to see all the positive information.

One other thing relating directly to the OP's comment is that there's nothing really preventing people signing up again under a different profile, so a ban might be pointless anyway.

Is not illegal for hiv positive people to have sex. If they were knowingly infecting people it's different.

But I don't think fab would ban if taking precautios . A well known app for the gays displays people status if they put it in.

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By *inx.x3Woman
over a year ago

Bath

No I wouldn’t have sex with them and I’d be pretty annoyed they left it to so late to inform me.

I wouldn’t report to admin though.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If they had just asked the question they would have gotten a different response. I think it was the “I would report them and get them banned” that has elicited this response

Too late, Red....the vultures are already circling.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If they had just asked the question they would have gotten a different response. I think it was the “I would report them and get them banned” that has elicited this response

Too late, Red....the vultures are already circling."

I tried to be helpful for once.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If they had just asked the question they would have gotten a different response. I think it was the “I would report them and get them banned” that has elicited this response

Too late, Red....the vultures are already circling.

I tried to be helpful for once. "

I thought your comment was spot on.

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By *andyfloss2000Woman
over a year ago

ashford

Personally no! But nothing to do with admin x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If they had just asked the question they would have gotten a different response. I think it was the “I would report them and get them banned” that has elicited this response

Too late, Red....the vultures are already circling."

16 weeks ago yes

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By *ananaman41Man
over a year ago

Dublin

"Would you swing with a swinger who said they were just before you was going to have sex with them they were HIV POSS. I know I wouldnt I report them to Admin"

Sorry your grammatical layout is a bit off.

Are you basically asking us if we would have sex with someone who just told us that he/she was hiv positive?

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By *ris GrayMan
over a year ago

Dorchester

"What's it got to do with admin? "
he doesn't want them to get infected either

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By *linyMan
over a year ago

Manchester/London

"Would you swing with a swinger who said they were just before you was going to have sex with them they were HIV POSS. I know I wouldnt I report them to Admin"

May I suggest you go to the Terrence Higgins website and educate yourself!

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By *reyToTheFairiesWoman
over a year ago

Carlisle usually

If someone left it that late to tell me, I'd probably say no and not see them again.

However, if someone is open and honest from early days with it, takes the required precautions, and generally behaves like a decent human being, it's not a deal breaker in itself.

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By *rBeejayMan
over a year ago

Edinburgh

"And this is why stigma is still an issue around HIV.

If they are positive on treatment they are no risk to you even if you had a condom split. I would be more concerned about the people who are unaware of their HIV status if I was you.

Report them to admin for what? Being open and honest?

It must have been so difficult to tell you in the first place snd you repay that respect with this kind of attitude- shame on you "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The 80s called … they want their uneducated stigmatised views back !

We practice safe sex - with everyone .. HIV status isn’t always known so you run the risk anytime you have unprotected sex . Those being treated nowadays usually have such a low viral load its undetectable so unable to be transmitted .

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By *lex46TV/TS
over a year ago

Near Wells

It's saver to have sex with a person that has HIV, is on medication and an undetectable viral load than it is with a person who doesn't know their HIV status.

I wonder if the Op knows his HIV status?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think Admin from a swingers site is the least of their worries?

Actually

Doctors should have a duty of care to report everyone who tests HIV positive to Fab admin?!…

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It's saver to have sex with a person that has HIV, is on medication and an undetectable viral load than it is with a person who doesn't know their HIV status.

I wonder if the Op knows his HIV status?"

Her

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By *otsossieMan
over a year ago

local, but not too local

Caveat Emptor.

Although it was my understanding that no money was to change hands.

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