FabSwingers.com forum: Would you split the bill on a first meet/date??

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

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By *allySlinkyWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

Of course. Why would anyone not unless the other can claim it on expenses.

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By *ittlemiss1985Woman
over a year ago

Lansing

I always expect to pay for myself or share of the meal unless we already agreed ahead of time one is going to pay for it.

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By *rettyflamingoWoman
over a year ago

Where the flamboyance of flamingos live

I always ask if we can go Dutch and split the bill. Sometimes though the guy will insist on paying.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Of course however it can sometimes be a little bit awkward when the other person insists on paying.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Of course however it can sometimes be a little bit awkward when the other person insists on paying. "

Sorry pressed send to soon (thumb slip)

In the past I've had the person say I've paid the bill but you can pay next time and I find that uncomfortable as it feels like somehow now they think I'm obligated to see them again.

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By *iamondCougarWoman
over a year ago

Norfuck! / Lincolnshire

I would yes

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By *lectrumMan
over a year ago

south shields

Going dutch yes

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By *elight 99Woman
over a year ago

richmond

Of course

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By *eard and TattsCouple
over a year ago

Cwmbran

No she can pay for it all

She was lucky enough to get a date with me in the first place so it's only fitting she coughs up the entirety of the bill

And my taxi home

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Dodgy question tbh as if the bill is paid by the guy in full the guy or the lady might..might think that because they paid in full that they might expect more ,but lm easy anyway if the lady insists ongoing halves ,no problem and if a lady has given me her time to meet l would of course offer to pick up the whole bill also without any hidden agenda , so either or..

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By *oobaaMan
over a year ago

South Shields

I normally suggest a cuppa somewhere for a 1st meet.

I would always pay the bill.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No. Gentleman should always offer to pay.

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By *ex HolesMan
over a year ago

Up North

Damn right I would. I mean I mightn’t like her

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"No. Gentleman should always offer to pay. "

Should they

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’d offer to pay as a gentleman, but wouldn’t want to cause a scene if she wanted to split, the bill. I’ll just pay for more drinks later

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No! I'd expect her to pay, I'm a very modern man and I believe in equal opportunities.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Depends

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By *ustBoWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere in Co. Down

I split the bill when I first meet someone off here. The same as if we meet again and go to a hotel I pay my half.The only time it doesn't happen is when I meet someone regularly and we tend to take turns paying. But I never expect nor want a guy to have to pay the bill when we first meet. I think the idea is pretty outdated. Plus it's not a date anyhow it's a chat to see if we get on in person and want to have sex on a first meet for me.

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By *eliWoman
over a year ago

Of course. If it means something to someone and they want to pay (by the time I meet them we've spoken a fair bit), I wouldn't insist on it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm always sneaky and paid before they notice.

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By *iss.ddWoman
over a year ago

Leeds + Newcastle

I always try to pay for what I've had.

I don't drink so I'm not paying for anyone else's booze at a meal

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I always try to pay for what I've had.

I don't drink so I'm not paying for anyone else's booze at a meal

Oh god I hate that! I go out with the girls from work and I never really drink, especially if driving and I hate it when they say "we will just split it". How about no, you and your mate sank 2 bottles of wine at £24 each, meanwhile I spent £5 on my drinks!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes.... I wouldn't want to be beholden anyway

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By *ora the explorerWoman
over a year ago

Paradise, Herts

I always offer. Sometimes they insist. If they do I’ll be paying next time. Don’t think I’ve ever bought a first drink. I’ll always buy the next one though.

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By *2000ManMan
over a year ago

Worthing

No need as first date would just be a coffee which would be my round.

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By *astandtheCurious2Couple
over a year ago

letchworth

Yes would always want to split the bill. I do quite like it if they offer to pay though, I’d still split it it’s just nice that they are willing to pay

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If its my idea then I pay, if its his then he pays. I cannot be doing with fumbling at a table splitting up a bill it's embarrassing. If you invite someone out then it's your treat and vice versa, I am the same with friends. If there's no second date/meet well that's just how the cookie crumbles. Would always have the conversation prior to going out.

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By *mily36CWoman
over a year ago

Bedford (or anywhere beginning with B..!?)

"Of course. Why would anyone not unless the other can claim it on expenses."

Haha, depends what's going on the expenses

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

Yes. Always.

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By *ebjonnsonMan
over a year ago

Maldon

Company Dutch. That was my line when dating just a few years ago:

“The meal and drinks are on my company credit card, the rest of the night is on you”. It got a few laughs.

You quickly learn with internet dating ( is there any other type these days?) for the first meeting to be a coffee date as you don’t want to waste an evening.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I always offer to pay on the first date, maybe its outdated now but that's just me.

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By *m3232Man
over a year ago

maidenhead

I would always pay.

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By *orphia2003Woman
over a year ago

Tonypandy.

Split it, as long as one person isn't necking really expensive drinks.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would offer to but pretty much always have had it turned down and ended up splitting it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I usually pay. Same goes for hotels. And if I'm invited to someone's house I usually bring a bottle.

However, I have not had they same treatment when I've hosted. Maybe it's just an age thing.

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By *etcplCouple
over a year ago

Gapping Fanny

Depends if I’m getting anything for it or not

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By *ssexSwitchMan
over a year ago

hornchurch

"I usually pay. Same goes for hotels. And if I'm invited to someone's house I usually bring a bottle.

However, I have not had they same treatment when I've hosted. Maybe it's just an age thing.

I would always bring a bottle as a guest. I just find it good manners

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By *hiskeyColaMan
over a year ago

Oswestry

It's funny, my attitude to this has changed. I used to take the old-fashioned view that the 'gentleman should pay', and I would take it as a sign that she didn't like me if she insisted on paying half (reasoning that she did NOT wish to be "obligated" to me). Now, however, I've got with the times and whilst I will always politely offer to pay, I no longer read anything in to whether or not she lets me. Tbh I like when she pays her way - I'm not actually a wealthy man!

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By *eard and TattsCouple
over a year ago

Cwmbran

I think most women would pay half so they didn't feel obliged to do anything after

It's also only fair

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By *ellhungvweMan
over a year ago

Cheltenham

"It's funny, my attitude to this has changed. I used to take the old-fashioned view that the 'gentleman should pay', and I would take it as a sign that she didn't like me if she insisted on paying half (reasoning that she did NOT wish to be "obligated" to me). Now, however, I've got with the times and whilst I will always politely offer to pay, I no longer read anything in to whether or not she lets me. Tbh I like when she pays her way - I'm not actually a wealthy man!

My attitude has also changed. I am more than happy to pay but I won’t read anything negative into her wanting to pay either.

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By *ssexSwitchMan
over a year ago

hornchurch

"I usually pay. Same goes for hotels. And if I'm invited to someone's house I usually bring a bottle.

However, I have not had they same treatment when I've hosted. Maybe it's just an age thing.

Shame I’m above your age range. I’d be happy to go Dutch x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes of course unless it was on the 21th October my birthday

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Yes of course unless it was on the 21th October my birthday

Happy birthday!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Yes of course unless it was on the 21th October my birthday

Happy birthday!!"

Thank you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If I suggest it, I am happy to pay but will always offer to pay or pay towards.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Nope. Maybe rules are different on a sex site but in general when dating. The person that suggested the date should pay and as a woman, I don’t feel obliged to be sexual or see you again just because you paid.

Equally if I asked you out on the date, I would arrange and pay for everything.

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By *luebell888Woman
over a year ago

Glasgowish

I always pay half.

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By *ighlander81Man
over a year ago

Hamilton

In a first date situation I tend not to go for food, always a coffee or a few drinks which I insist on paying for

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By *orthern StarsCouple
over a year ago

Durham

Absolutely. Who would really expect someone else to pay the full bill, that's just bad mannered.

Mr did end up paying the bill on our 2nd date but not without a lot of resisting from me. I repaid him well when I took him back to my house

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By *D of funCouple
over a year ago

Northampton

Definitely half

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Personally I’d insist on paying however I wouldn’t want to cause offence, if we’ve enjoyed each other’s company it’s a great way to get in the conversation about having another meal together and maybe they pay next time ?

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By *odgerMooreMan
over a year ago

Carlisle

No - I would demand the woman pay as she got the benefit of my dazzling company and I would hate for her to feel like a freeloader getting sparkling wit, charm and wank bank material from meeting me - as well as a free meal!!

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By *arkus1812Man
over a year ago

Lifes departure lounge NN9 Northamptonshire East not West MidlandsMidlands

"Yes of course unless it was on the 21th October my birthday

Happy Birthday

on Trafalgar Day

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

I would expect to split the bill. Some people become insistent that they will pay, some men see it as an affront to them and in those cases it's sometimes easier to just let them.

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By *arkus1812Man
over a year ago

Lifes departure lounge NN9 Northamptonshire East not West MidlandsMidlands

"If its my idea then I pay, if its his then he pays. I cannot be doing with fumbling at a table splitting up a bill it's embarrassing. If you invite someone out then it's your treat and vice versa, I am the same with friends. If there's no second date/meet well that's just how the cookie crumbles. Would always have the conversation prior to going out. "

Exactly this

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By *UGGYBEAR2015Man
over a year ago

BRIDPORT

How much is a packet of digestives these days?

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"How much is a packet of digestives these days?"

Fortnums or Aldi?

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By *UGGYBEAR2015Man
over a year ago

BRIDPORT

"How much is a packet of digestives these days?

Fortnums or Aldi?"

Quicksave, own brand.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

[Removed by poster at 21/10/22 09:05:49]

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"How much is a packet of digestives these days?

Fortnums or Aldi?

Quicksave, own brand.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Always offered but usually ended up taking turns which allowed for a split, not always even though. Let's say you get the lunch, I'll get coffee and cakes after or tickets to an attraction we want to visit.

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"I always ask if we can go Dutch and split the bill. Sometimes though the guy will insist on paying. "

I don't back down. If I say I'm paying my portion that's what happens.

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"How much is a packet of digestives these days?

Fortnums or Aldi?

Quicksave, own brand.

Kwik Save.......??? not seen one for years

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The first time i meet someone its free for both but i dont date

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By *ackbydemandMan
over a year ago

Leicester

Always offer to pay, if they say no and prefer to split or even pay themselves then accept. People know what they want and chivalry won't change that.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I always insist on paying. I know it's an old world thing and I should be more comfortable with splitting it but for some reason, I'd just feel bad for it.

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"Always offer to pay, if they say no and prefer to split or even pay themselves then accept. People know what they want and chivalry won't change that."

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

Yes

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"I always insist on paying. I know it's an old world thing and I should be more comfortable with splitting it but for some reason, I'd just feel bad for it."

Some people will think that is lovely and i'm sure you do too.

You wouldn't pay for me if i'd decided i would pay for myself. Insisting is futile

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By *atnip make me purrWoman
over a year ago

Reading

I always offer. I'm always told no.

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"I always offer. I'm always told no. "

And you do what you are told ? Not what you want.

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By *odgerMooreMan
over a year ago

Carlisle

"I always insist on paying. I know it's an old world thing and I should be more comfortable with splitting it but for some reason, I'd just feel bad for it.

Some people will think that is lovely and i'm sure you do too.

You wouldn't pay for me if i'd decided i would pay for myself. Insisting is futile

Just so you know when we meet i’ll be having a coffee and a raspberry & white chocolate muffin - probably a big biscuit thing too.. so get saving!!

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By *ohn KanakaMan
over a year ago

Not all that North of North London

I'd never go to eat with someone I was meeting for the first time. I'd expect to take turns buying a round of drinks. If they expected me to pay its unlikely I'd see them a second time

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"I always insist on paying. I know it's an old world thing and I should be more comfortable with splitting it but for some reason, I'd just feel bad for it.

Some people will think that is lovely and i'm sure you do too.

You wouldn't pay for me if i'd decided i would pay for myself. Insisting is futile

Just so you know when we meet i’ll be having a coffee and a raspberry & white chocolate muffin - probably a big biscuit thing too.. so get saving!!

Todger you can have precisely what your heart desires.... and more.

I'll be going out the lavvy window.

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By *LiamMan
over a year ago

Midlands

Just do a runner.

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"I'd never go to eat with someone I was meeting for the first time. I'd expect to take turns buying a round of drinks. If they expected me to pay its unlikely I'd see them a second time"

Wise.

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By *inky_CarpenterMan
over a year ago

Portsmouth

No I'd expect her cuck hubby to settle the bill, while I take her up to the room

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By *ohn KanakaMan
over a year ago

Not all that North of North London

"I'd never go to eat with someone I was meeting for the first time. I'd expect to take turns buying a round of drinks. If they expected me to pay its unlikely I'd see them a second time

Wise. "

Widser than you could ever know!

You know how I type and it's all over the place? I'm a but like thst with cutlery, no one needs to be subjected to that

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Of course however it can sometimes be a little bit awkward when the other person insists on paying.

Sorry pressed send to soon (thumb slip)

In the past I've had the person say I've paid the bill but you can pay next time and I find that uncomfortable as it feels like somehow now they think I'm obligated to see them again. "

Exactly, it's awkward af and can lead to very very sour grapes. I'd turn down a repeat based on this alone as it smacks of manipulation.

In picking a place to meet I'd want somewhere you order and pay at the counter so I can avoid a 'bill' situation.

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"I'd never go to eat with someone I was meeting for the first time. I'd expect to take turns buying a round of drinks. If they expected me to pay its unlikely I'd see them a second time

Wise.

Widser than you could ever know!

You know how I type and it's all over the place? I'm a but like thst with cutlery, no one needs to be subjected to that

Don't get the spaghetti ....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No I’d expect them to buy the restaurant to avoid embarrassing moments about the bill

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By *oastalloversCouple
over a year ago

Cornwall

Dutch way for meal out.

If it's our idea for a social meet, first drinks are on us only if you definitely look like your profile.

Otherwise you're paying for yourself, lol!

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

We recently stayed in an hotel. The booking was in my name, the credit card was in my name, the receptionist gave the receipt to Mr N. While away we met some friends for dinner, we were the older couple by some years. The younger woman asked for the bill which was put in front of Mr N.

Even the hospitality industry expects the man to pay in most situations

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By *ackformore100Man
over a year ago

Tin town

Funny some of the mental gymnastics people do in what is a really simple and extremely pleasant situation. Am I obliged? Is he expecting more? I'm independent... Way too complicated.

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By *issmorganWoman
over a year ago

Calderdale innit

Yes no problem .

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By *agneto.Man
over a year ago

Bham

Yes Dutch on first dinner date.

Daytime coffee and I invite I'll pay.

Drinks I'll get the first round and then it's rounds.

Gone are the days when a guy pays for everything.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Old fashioned always pay

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Absolutely no chance of me letting anyone pay.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

I'm not going to argue over a cup of coffee, I'm not even goiy to argue if you insist on paying for a whole meal. I will just wonder why.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"Absolutely no chance of me letting anyone pay.

Why?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

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By *izandpaulCouple
over a year ago

merseyside

"No she can pay for it all

She was lucky enough to get a date with me in the first place so it's only fitting she coughs up the entirety of the bill

And my taxi home"

That's fair and I'll probably have to follow you back home in a different taxi, obviously paid by me, to hand out a shag.

I'd be worried to refuse as this would only give more proof that us ladies become hysterical for no apparent reason.

Are we talking about FAB meets or just general out and about as in reality I've never seen it as an issue, one of us will pick up the bill, no firm and fixed rules.

Often wondered why Paul always nips to loo at end of meal, I'll be checking in future.

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By *imi_RougeWoman
over a year ago

Portsmouth

No, I always let the man pay.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes, I would split happily and that's always my intention. I don't ever expect anyone to pay the bill for me. But if he was insistent on paying I would let him.

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By *ittlekinks38Woman
over a year ago

outside belfast x

I insist on splitting the bill and equalling splitting it not counting down to the last penny you spend like I've know some people to do! So yeah 50/50 definitely

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By *BootyfulDayWoman
over a year ago

…

Yes I would

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By *gkhanMan
over a year ago

Leicester

"Yes of course unless it was on the 21th October my birthday

HAPPY BIRTHDAY

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By *UGGYBEAR2015Man
over a year ago

BRIDPORT

"How much is a packet of digestives these days?

Fortnums or Aldi?

Quicksave, own brand.

Kwik Save.......??? not seen one for years"

Are they no longer about, you’ll have to excuse me Granny, I’m a bit out of touch, the domestic staff do the grocery shopping these days.

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By *orny PTMan
over a year ago

Peterborough

"No. Gentleman should always offer to pay. "

Does this imply women are not earners, what about when two men meet up?

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By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago

East London

Yes, or pay for it.

If he's asked to take me to somewhere in particular he might want to pay though.

In which case I'd take him somewhere next time.

Some men like an argument over me paying and I hate public confrontations so I let him pay then tell him I'm paying next time. I'd slip him the cash if he felt embarrassed with me taking the bill at the table.

In some places you can use the app and pay. That way no one knows he's my bitch

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By *ackbydemandMan
over a year ago

Leicester

"Yes, or pay for it.

If he's asked to take me to somewhere in particular he might want to pay though.

In which case I'd take him somewhere next time.

In some places you can use the app and pay. That way no one knows he's my bitch

There's no shame in letting someone pay if they offer and that goes both ways, I would gladly be your "bitch" as long as everyone was happy.

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By *sBlueWoman
over a year ago

Up North

Yes always

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By *ris GrayMan
over a year ago

Dorchester

Maybe I'm old fashioned but a gent always pays

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By *ackformore100Man
over a year ago

Tin town

"No. Gentleman should always offer to pay.

Does this imply women are not earners, what about when two men meet up?"

The gent should always pay?

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"I insist on splitting the bill and equalling splitting it not counting down to the last penny you spend like I've know some people to do! So yeah 50/50 definitely "

I've gone off bill splitting since we have a friend who eats of the expensive menu and always has pud and another that has a glass of wine or two .....

I am paying my own bill next time to have just what I ordered and ate on my own bill.

I know it seems tight and if it were only once it would be. However it's every month now .....

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By *tephanie_fellatrixTV/TS
over a year ago

Derby

If I invite someone on a date or anything else at my invitation then I would expect to pay.

If the outing is jointly arranged then splitting the bill is acceptable.

But to go back to the OP question a first date is likely to be by my invitation so I would expect to pay.

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"Yes, or pay for it.

If he's asked to take me to somewhere in particular he might want to pay though.

In which case I'd take him somewhere next time.

In some places you can use the app and pay. That way no one knows he's my bitch

There's no shame in letting someone pay if they offer and that goes both ways, I would gladly be your "bitch" as long as everyone was happy."

oops .....

so the gent pays and the one who doesn't pay is the bitch of the other ....... oh dear the truth does out in mysterious ways

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would offer/attempt to pay, but immediately go halves without skipping a beat if there was any objection or discomfort suggested by the other person.. I don't think there's wrong with a little bit of chivalry, nor do I think equality means being quite so literal about things.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

THIS!

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By *aturefun63Man
over a year ago

Belper

First meeting I would pay,but happy for her to pay if have second meeting

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By *eamworkboyMan
over a year ago

Irvine

No, it's quite simple, I'd pay.

Call me old fashioned

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By *riel13Woman
over a year ago

Northampton

Yes

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I prefer the man to pay.

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By *hrista BellendWoman
over a year ago

surrounded by twinkly lights

Yep. I have had a few tussles to actually get to pay though, so I normally stealth it

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By *andyfloss2000Woman
over a year ago

ashford

Of course! But have been on meets where he has insisted on paying x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Always 50/50 no matter what. Weekends or holiday anything. X

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’d normally excuse myself for the toilet and pay the bill en route so there can be no arguments over the bill.

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By *entBarryUKMan
over a year ago

Ashford

I would if the other person insisted, but I would always offer to pay it all first.

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By *affeine DuskMan
over a year ago

Caerphilly

Yes, I spit on the balls on a first date/meet.

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

It's very interesting to me that people will say 'call me old fashioned' or 'he insists so I let him.' .....

What is the basis of both those statements ..... what does being 'old fashioned' mean ?

Do women who say oh okay when a man insists ...... only cave in when he's paying for something or do you cave at all his insistences...

I'm genuinely interested ....

( p.s. I love a freebie as much as the next person and there's no moral judgement being made )

I'm just interested in the reasons behind the thoughts n actions ?

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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

I would really always insist on paying my share - after all we live in an era of equality.

If I really liked the person and they were insisting on paying, I would possibly agree but only if I could pay on the second date.

It is how I was brought up and it still kind of sits right with me.

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

I'm just wondering what the principles behind the behaviours are ?

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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

"I’d normally excuse myself for the toilet and pay the bill en route so there can be no arguments over the bill. "

a very elegant way... and despite my more feminist thinking, I think this is cute.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I'd say I'm old fashioned nice to wines and dines

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Depends if Bill wanted splitting or not.

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By *oo..Woman
over a year ago

Boo's World

Yes , and on any other meal fab or non fab I'd always offer too.

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By *orthwhile27Man
over a year ago

dark side of the moon

I'd always pay and to make the lady feel ok about it I'd say it was on expenses.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Yes , and on any other meal fab or non fab I'd always offer too. "

Do you fancy a spit roast, sorry split roast this weekend ?

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By *oo..Woman
over a year ago

Boo's World

"Yes , and on any other meal fab or non fab I'd always offer too.

Do you fancy a spit roast, sorry split roast this weekend ?

My eyes still haven't recovered from watching your Dad dancing last weekend Blooms

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Yes , and on any other meal fab or non fab I'd always offer too.

Do you fancy a spit roast, sorry split roast this weekend ?

My eyes still haven't recovered from watching your Dad dancing last weekend Blooms

Harsh but fair

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Of course

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By *trawberry shortcake 9999Woman
over a year ago

I don't expect anyone to pay for me, if I can't afford to pay I won't go out

The last time I met someone I picked them up and drove, they paid for food, we have met since, they accommodate and I bring the food and we take it in turns to choose the film

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By *herryblossom_BJWoman
over a year ago

Oxfordshire/Hampshire

I dumped a guy for expecting me to pay for dinner and no thanks afterwards

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By *herryblossom_BJWoman
over a year ago

Oxfordshire/Hampshire

To me it shows kind and generous heart if a man offers or insist in paying. In my culture, it's very normal for the man to impress you by paying

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By *skaway!Man
over a year ago

South East.

I’m old fashioned, so I’d pay with no expectations.

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By *elaninMaverickWoman
over a year ago

near Putney Heath

"??"

yes.

What I won't do is fight a man for a bill because I realise that some men's egos demand that they pay as the man.

My ego is like whatever is easiest that doesn't harm me.

I've had men on Fab just want me to come around for sex and when I mention a social meet at a restaurant, they automatically assume that I want them to pay for everything.

Mate if you had a conversation with me, you would know we could go to Nandos for all I care and I will order and pay for my things at the till.

I only had one guy suggest we go cycling instead as we both have bicycles and live near a popular cycling park.

The rest are like come to my home and let me do whatever I want. F off for real.

Men, Please definitely consider women's safety and comfort.

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By *elaninMaverickWoman
over a year ago

near Putney Heath

"Company Dutch. That was my line when dating just a few years ago:

“The meal and drinks are on my company credit card, the rest of the night is on you”. It got a few laughs.

You quickly learn with internet dating ( is there any other type these days?) for the first meeting to be a coffee date as you don’t want to waste an evening. "

I find coffee dates so incredibly boring! like literally 30 minutes, one coffee and now I want to go home. Lol! I can't even think of a coffee date that I've had that went well!

I've had a better date at the Victoria and Albert Museum than coffee dates!

Don't say only men who do coffee dates are boring. Lol!

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By *lephantisMan
over a year ago

Oxford

I would usually expect to pay: one of the few ways in which I am old-fashioned. For me, it's part of the pleasure of a date, though I'd never insist.

BUT this thread has reminded me that a woman might think that I'd assume paying would confer some kind of entitlement, or assumptions. It doesn't matter that that wouldn't be true. She wouldn't drfinitely know that, and it might make her uncomfortable.

The fact that I know I never would is irrelevant. The possibility would be there, and that might shadow the whole meeting.

Oh, it's complicated. I try to do the right thing. I always cross the road if I'm walking behind a single woman, especially at night. Now I'm rethinking whether what I thought was generosity might come across as a tie, or a commitment, or...

Damn it.

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By *ackandtheunicornCouple
over a year ago

liverpool

Always split the bill for me Mr

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By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago

East London

"It's very interesting to me that people will say 'call me old fashioned' or 'he insists so I let him.' .....

What is the basis of both those statements ..... what does being 'old fashioned' mean ?

Do women who say oh okay when a man insists ...... only cave in when he's paying for something or do you cave at all his insistences...

I'm genuinely interested ....

( p.s. I love a freebie as much as the next person and there's no moral judgement being made )

I'm just interested in the reasons behind the thoughts n actions ?"

If a man won't accept that I am willing to split a bill or pay I'll give in easy. It's not the end of the world, and I'm not having an argument with someone over the price of fish and chips and a JD and cola.

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By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago

East London

"I would usually expect to pay: one of the few ways in which I am old-fashioned. For me, it's part of the pleasure of a date, though I'd never insist.

The fact that I know I never would is irrelevant. The possibility would be there, and that might shadow the whole meeting.

Damn it."

I have had that. He insisted on paying then told me he had booked a room in a hotel miles away; assuming dinner meant dinner and sex.

Lucky for him I wanted sex, but it was supposed to be just a social.

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By *lephantisMan
over a year ago

Oxford

I have had that. He insisted on paying then told me he had booked a room in a hotel miles away; assuming dinner meant dinner and sex.

Lucky for him I wanted sex, but it was supposed to be just a social.

That's awful. I'm so far the other way. I joked with someone on here that unless a woman lies back, naked, legs open, on her bed, holding a neon sign saying "Fuck me now!", I won't spot the signals.

I wasn't really joking.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No never I always pay for the first date

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