FabSwingers.com forum: Bullying

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Has anyone of you in your Adult life encountered Bullying or have been bullied by either individuals or Managers. Plus what was the outcome?

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By *ibsonsgCouple
over a year ago

New Milton

Yes, same company 3 tribunals all won

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

Yes, once. I left the job despite a senior manager offering to 'have a word'.

I have offered to support colleagues who I've noticed are experiencing bullying

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Yes, same company 3 tribunals all won"

What type of bullying was it?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Yes, once. I left the job despite a senior manager offering to 'have a word'.

I have offered to support colleagues who I've noticed are experiencing bullying "

Do you think they actually did have a word?

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By *eisty LadyWoman
over a year ago

Count Your Blessings Cottage, Gratitude Grove

Yes I left at 15 year job because of it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Has anyone of you in your Adult life encountered Bullying or have been bullied by either individuals or Managers. Plus what was the outcome?"

Have you ?

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By *lderflower_AppleWoman
over a year ago

Basingstoke

I was bullied by an older manager. I made a formal complaint to HR and was told 'it's just his way, don't worry he'll be retiring soon'. I lost all respect for the head of HR at that point, but persevered in my role despite the way the manager continually denigrated me - out of stubbornness to prove the c@nt wrong. He did retire about 12 months later and I thrived as soon as he left.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I had a director at work bullying a colleague, me & a few work mates used to have ‘banter’ between us in the office, yet the director always took it too far. A complaint was made about the director & then he tried to share the blame and drag everyone down with him. Anyway he then announced he was leaving and my colleague burst into tears of joy, not many people I dislike but I absolutely hate the prick.

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By *ambertMan
over a year ago

Cheltenham

I was bullied horrendously in my last job. Ended up having a breakdown

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By *ablo minibar123Woman
over a year ago

I don't know if it was bullying really, but either way it made my work day a misery so I found something else and am now much happier

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By *andyfloss2000Woman
over a year ago

ashford

My goodness yes! Have witnessed it big time! Reported it! Once a Bully usually allways one! X

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By *ohn KanakaMan
over a year ago

Not all that North of North London

Yes my last manager bullied me over a period of years, most of it was low level then I found out I was autistic and he made my life hell. I resigned after 3 months off sick and multiple suicide attempts.

Currently in contact with the the CEO of the Local Authority about the treatment I received. ACAS are involved at early conciliation stage. Personal injury lawyers are also on standby.

I couldn't care less about the compensation I may get. I just want to see him held accountable and bring a whole heap of grief to his world

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By *ools and the brainCouple
over a year ago

couple, us we him her.

I work in the building trade and bullying is part of the job unfortunately.

Hidden behind the banner of "banter"

Hate my choice of career.

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By *oppolocosTV/TS
over a year ago

inverurie

"I was bullied by an older manager. I made a formal complaint to HR and was told 'it's just his way, don't worry he'll be retiring soon'. I lost all respect for the head of HR at that point, but persevered in my role despite the way the manager continually denigrated me - out of stubbornness to prove the c@nt wrong. He did retire about 12 months later and I thrived as soon as he left. "

HR, aka Management's condom!

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"Yes, once. I left the job despite a senior manager offering to 'have a word'.

I have offered to support colleagues who I've noticed are experiencing bullying

Do you think they actually did have a word? "

Yes. I never went back to work there but had cause to go into the work place and came face to face with the 'lady' responsible. She looked extremely embarrassed and uncomfortable.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

HR only exist to protect the company.

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By *2000ManMan
over a year ago

Worthing

Verbal abuse/personal putdowns in front of people but I stood my ground and did not let it get to me. All came good in the end.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"I work in the building trade and bullying is part of the job unfortunately.

Hidden behind the banner of "banter"

Hate my choice of career."

God I hate the banter excuse. Grown people excusing vile behaviour and laughing about it. Abhorrent

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Has anyone of you in your Adult life encountered Bullying or have been bullied by either individuals or Managers. Plus what was the outcome?

Have you ?"

Yes many times however I've never left my job because it.I always involved management and sticking out and fight my point. however it was their management that were doing it and can be difficult when it's their mates they have to deal with.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Yes I left at 15 year job because of it "

Why, sort em out and don't let them win. Feel food about reporting it but I understand why you did leave.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I work in the building trade and bullying is part of the job unfortunately.

Hidden behind the banner of "banter"

Hate my choice of career.

God I hate the banter excuse. Grown people excusing vile behaviour and laughing about it. Abhorrent "

Yes banter can be borderline and not everyone wants it so people need to know their audience. Unfortunately the gob shites of the world don't have any empathy and try to rule the room

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Verbal abuse/personal putdowns in front of people but I stood my ground and did not let it get to me. All came good in the end."

Good for you

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By *wingin CatMan
over a year ago

London

I worked for BT for 24 years straight after leaving school. Bullying was commonplace against junior members of staff, or for any other reason (in my case, some of it was clearly racial discrimination). For the early part of my time there, I challenged points in annual appraisals which I disagreed with. It didn't change the points, but my comments were noted in the report.

In my last few years at the company, I filed a grievance against a useless manager who spent no time in my interest, shunted me across the department from pillar to post, and was completely defensive and aggressive when confronted. The grievance was a success. He was given a warning, but left the company a few months later. Last I heard was that he had shuffled off this mortal coil a few years ago.

No one should have to suffer bullying or harassment in their job. You wouldn't tolerate it in real life, so how can the work environment be any different?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

HR only exist to protect the company.

No matter who or department it is I just feel they are poor at dealing with people. They either don't want the extra work or confrontation or they aren't trained to deal with these problems.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"I work in the building trade and bullying is part of the job unfortunately.

Hidden behind the banner of "banter"

Hate my choice of career.

God I hate the banter excuse. Grown people excusing vile behaviour and laughing about it. Abhorrent

Yes banter can be borderline and not everyone wants it so people need to know their audience. Unfortunately the gob shites of the world don't have any empathy and try to rule the room"

They're bullies plain and simple. They have neither the emotional intelligence nor ordinary common sense to realise that though.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I work in the building trade and bullying is part of the job unfortunately.

Hidden behind the banner of "banter"

Hate my choice of career."

I understand where you are coming from. Its about how much you can take however fuck the bullies off and I enjoy seeing them out in their place. Never ever give in to these people.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I don't know if it was bullying really, but either way it made my work day a misery so I found something else and am now much happier"

Please explain to use your story

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By *wingin CatMan
over a year ago

London

I should also add that my union were eternally helpful and supportive when I needed them, especially in the grievance mentioned above, where I had to take it to Stage 2.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

HR only exist to protect the company.

No matter who or department it is I just feel they are poor at dealing with people. They either don't want the extra work or confrontation or they aren't trained to deal with these problems. "

They're trained to make sure all boxes are ticked so the company is protected from litigation. HR is for the company, a union is for the employees. Human Resources, the name tells you all you need to know, the people are of no more value to them than any other resource or asset.

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By *onkeynutWoman
over a year ago

somewhere

Yes, sort of. I worked in a male dominated environment with lots of banter. I was the only female and could hold my own, but this person continually took things too far, comments overstepped the mark and became personal on too many occasions.

Eventually I called him out on it and to be fair to him he apologised and it stopped.

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By *iamondCougarWoman
over a year ago

Norfuck! / Lincolnshire

Yes, by a manger who has now left

Hateful, hateful man … I offered to kick out a rung on his way down the ladder when he was booted out months later!

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By *wingin CatMan
over a year ago

London

"Banter" is the worst excuse in the world; even more so to cover up veiled insults and verbal aggression in the workplace.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes was taking up with HR, he was nice as pie to me after.

Ended up getting a supervisor job over are suite.

Tried to micro manage everything, we're told we could stay an extra hour during the week to finish half day on a Friday so I just went to the manager above him.

Ended up leaving as I couldn't get moved which was down to him.

Pay was great and hours decent but had to leave as it was triggering my depression and anxiety and no jobs worth that.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

""Banter" is the worst excuse in the world; even more so to cover up veiled insults and verbal aggression in the workplace."

I'm in construction and if you ain't taking the piss out of someone you ain't normal, but I've seen it get to the stage where you could see it was starting to get to one guy and I actually stood up and said enough is enough, he thanked me after because he didn't have the balls too tell them to fuck off himself.

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By *idlandiaMan
over a year ago

Birmingham

Middle manager who tried to use his little bit of power over everyone at my work place has just been given overall general management position.

It's been less than a week and his new behaviour has caused 7 people to quit so far.

Hr is a no go, 1 person dept, his friend, whom he gave the job too....

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By *wingin CatMan
over a year ago

London

""Banter" is the worst excuse in the world; even more so to cover up veiled insults and verbal aggression in the workplace.

What I could never fathom is (with due respect to the building and construction workers here) why do they need to behave in such a way? Is it to prove their insecure "alpha-male" status, or just general neanderthal tendencies?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Middle manager who tried to use his little bit of power over everyone at my work place has just been given overall general management position.

It's been less than a week and his new behaviour has caused 7 people to quit so far.

Hr is a no go, 1 person dept, his friend, whom he gave the job too...."

Similar at my work. His incompetence nearly got the company into major issues on numerous occasions.

8 people left because of him. Serious allegations of bullying and sexism against him. HR did nothing. He left with a golden handshake this year.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

""Banter" is the worst excuse in the world; even more so to cover up veiled insults and verbal aggression in the workplace.

Its just nature I guess, look at any males in the animal kingdom and there's a pecking order, same with humans, female lions will all go and hunt together but when another male strays into his territory its a ruck.

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By *ohn KanakaMan
over a year ago

Not all that North of North London

""Banter" is the worst excuse in the world; even more so to cover up veiled insults and verbal aggression in the workplace.

It's a combination of both I think and not exclusive to those in the construction industry. I find it all quite toxic

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

""Banter" is the worst excuse in the world; even more so to cover up veiled insults and verbal aggression in the workplace.

Yeah but humans have the ability to reason and observe the effect of our behaviour on other people. Well, most of us do. The banter crowd don't appear to have evolved that far

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

""Banter" is the worst excuse in the world; even more so to cover up veiled insults and verbal aggression in the workplace.

Yeah but humans have the ability to reason and observe the effect of our behaviour on other people. Well, most of us do. The banter crowd don't appear to have evolved that far"

Its a funny industry, it's one where any numpty like me with very little education and no grades or qualifications can just walk into and earn a decent living, but yeah, some dont know where to draw the line or have the ability to recognise when what they're saying can actually hurt and do damage mentally

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

""Banter" is the worst excuse in the world; even more so to cover up veiled insults and verbal aggression in the workplace.

Yeah but humans have the ability to reason and observe the effect of our behaviour on other people. Well, most of us do. The banter crowd don't appear to have evolved that far

I don't think it has anything to do with education or qualifications

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Yes, sort of. I worked in a male dominated environment with lots of banter. I was the only female and could hold my own, but this person continually took things too far, comments overstepped the mark and became personal on too many occasions.

Eventually I called him out on it and to be fair to him he apologised and it stopped."

Good for you! It's not always as easy to do that as it should be, but what you did probably helped others too.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

""Banter" is the worst excuse in the world; even more so to cover up veiled insults and verbal aggression in the workplace.

Yeah but humans have the ability to reason and observe the effect of our behaviour on other people. Well, most of us do. The banter crowd don't appear to have evolved that far

I don't think it has anything to do with education or qualifications

Its not all about being academically educated, you could have grades coming out your arse but still be a cunt to everyone lol

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

""Banter" is the worst excuse in the world; even more so to cover up veiled insults and verbal aggression in the workplace.

Yeah but humans have the ability to reason and observe the effect of our behaviour on other people. Well, most of us do. The banter crowd don't appear to have evolved that far

I don't think it has anything to do with education or qualifications

Its not all about being academically educated, you could have grades coming out your arse but still be a cunt to everyone lol"

Quite!

Just be a decent human

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By *iren4uWoman
over a year ago

jersey channel islands

I was forced financially to quit . Constructive unfair dismissal with 2 very young children 1 month before Xmas. I had trouble after baby so was unable to do anything about it. I have no words about the way I was treated. He definitely broke several employment laws.

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By *eneralKenobiMan
over a year ago

North Angus

Haven’t been bullied since school but it was bad enough back then that I don’t stand for even seeing it going on. In the workplace I Will get between a manager and employee without a second thought

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I hate bullying. Anyone bullies me or mine will suffer

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

Our son was bullied at school. It's extremely difficult to deal with.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Has anyone of you in your Adult life encountered Bullying or have been bullied by either individuals or Managers. Plus what was the outcome?"

Yep not within a work situation, but bullies are everywhere

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Our son was bullied at school. It's extremely difficult to deal with. "

It's a bad situation. I'm sorry he went through it.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"Our son was bullied at school. It's extremely difficult to deal with.

It's a bad situation. I'm sorry he went through it. "

Thanks. We dealt with it as well as we could but had to involve police at one point. There was only one teacher who ever dealt with it effectively.

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By *eisty LadyWoman
over a year ago

Count Your Blessings Cottage, Gratitude Grove

"Yes I left at 15 year job because of it

Why, sort em out and don't let them win. Feel food about reporting it but I understand why you did leave."

…

I applied for early retirement …. 18 months sIck leave whilst still receiving pay … they tried everything they could to stop me getting it including sacking me against company policy (can’t do that if someone is going through the retirement process so I was reinstated)

In the end I won, I got early retirement so never have to work again

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Our son was bullied at school. It's extremely difficult to deal with.

It's a bad situation. I'm sorry he went through it.

Thanks. We dealt with it as well as we could but had to involve police at one point. There was only one teacher who ever dealt with it effectively."

It's so hard. If the family of the bully are wankers then it's even harder. There are usually reasons, bad home etc. Unravelling all that to resolve the situation is nigh on impossible. Just the fact you have to do that despite the effect it has on your son as well, horrible

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"Our son was bullied at school. It's extremely difficult to deal with.

It's a bad situation. I'm sorry he went through it.

Thanks. We dealt with it as well as we could but had to involve police at one point. There was only one teacher who ever dealt with it effectively.

It only resolved properly when they left school.

Our son became a well rounded adult, the bully did not.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

""Banter" is the worst excuse in the world; even more so to cover up veiled insults and verbal aggression in the workplace.

Bully or be bullied is their motto

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By *ldbutrandyMan
over a year ago

West Midlands

"Our son was bullied at school. It's extremely difficult to deal with. "

In my day (centuries ago , it seems)

It was mainly the teachers doing the bullying.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"Our son was bullied at school. It's extremely difficult to deal with.

In my day (centuries ago , it seems)

It was mainly the teachers doing the bullying. "

I've found that bullying is an equal opportunities trait.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Happened at one job someone tried it on constantly giving me grief until i picked up a scaffold tube and reacted

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By *ornym66Man
over a year ago

Col /ips

Nice profile & video

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I was bullied at school and the PE teacher used to do it as well, as I was shit at football. He would validate all the grief I got from the bullies and allow it.

Left school and became a big tall long haired cunt with piercings n that. The look on the twats face when he walked into the shop I was working in while at college was wicked.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Happened at one job someone tried it on constantly giving me grief until i picked up a scaffold tube and reacted "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Kind of, when I was 18 and started my apprenticeship with another guy. He wes kind of more laddish in his behaviour and banter where it was more about taking the piss out of you and I genuinely thought he was bullying me and as a result, I got quite defensive which he saw as me being uptight.

We worked together for 5 years and over the course of that time, I learned to give it back a bit and take the piss out of him and he mellowed out a little. We both matured in that time and we've actually been close friends ever since

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Kind of, when I was 18 and started my apprenticeship with another guy. He wes kind of more laddish in his behaviour and banter where it was more about taking the piss out of you and I genuinely thought he was bullying me and as a result, I got quite defensive which he saw as me being uptight.

This is the nicest response to the thread

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I was bullied at school and the PE teacher used to do it as well, as I was shit at football. He would validate all the grief I got from the bullies and allow it.

Left school and became a big tall long haired cunt with piercings n that. The look on the twats face when he walked into the shop I was working in while at college was wicked. "
judo chop

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This is the nicest response to the thread"

Thank you, I think it's one of the only times I changed my mind about a person after a bad first impression

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By *abs..Woman
over a year ago

I was bullied my entire school life and I was bullied at work for a time in my first job. I can’t stand bullies and I can sniff one out at twenty paces.

Never again will I be bullied.

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By *ornym66Man
over a year ago

Col /ips

I was bullied in my first year at secondary school by this large lad in the 4th year I hated school I would lock my self in the bathroom to miss the bus my parents spoke to his cousin it stopped after that then years later at that school I saw a young boy been bullied by third year boys I was in my 5th year I looked out for him after that

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By *wingin CatMan
over a year ago

London

"I was bullied my entire school life and I was bullied at work for a time in my first job. I can’t stand bullies and I can sniff one out at twenty paces.

Never again will I be bullied. "

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By *nked and Ms InkedCouple
over a year ago

nr wrexham

Yes, a new sister took over a ward I was on, her and the clique (drinking buddies) they formed were awful! Although she did have to be nice to me when she called me into the office (imagine how I felt being called in, thought would be to give me shit again) and I’m sure she hated having to thank me for my documentation. She always complained I wasn’t fast enough, but being so thorough saved the hospital from two potential law suits! They were able to prove they weren’t negligent because of my admission notes, and documentation.

Went to work for two weeks on another ward, as they needed experienced staff, never went back when they offered me the chance to stay.

I was also the tissue viability link nurse (put forward because of my assessments of wounds and correct pressure relieving equipment), the haematology link nurse (including being trained up to teach and assess giving blood transfusions) ,and I was trained in ecg’s/bloods and inserting venflons.

I was also trained up in teaching others to use the new infusion pumps (even asked to consider applying to teach them as my main job). I did all that in my own time, so she then had to get other members of staff to do what I could do. Have to admit, that gave me some degree of satisfaction xx

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By *wingin CatMan
over a year ago

London

Found this meme in my FB feed recently, and I couldn't have put it better myself:

"There isn't a single person on this planet who is entitled to treat you like crap.

Remember that".

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Yes, a new sister took over a ward I was on, her and the clique (drinking buddies) they formed were awful! Although she did have to be nice to me when she called me into the office (imagine how I felt being called in, thought would be to give me shit again) and I’m sure she hated having to thank me for my documentation. She always complained I wasn’t fast enough, but being so thorough saved the hospital from two potential law suits! They were able to prove they weren’t negligent because of my admission notes, and documentation.

Went to work for two weeks on another ward, as they needed experienced staff, never went back when they offered me the chance to stay.

Brilliant!

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By *partharmonyCouple
over a year ago

Ruislip

Yes, I've had at least one bully per job from leaving university to my thirties. I just look for another job and get out of there.

Now that I'm older and more experienced, I'm more likely to tell somebody to f off and seek embarrass them for their behaviour. Luke

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By *ily WhiteWoman
over a year ago

I had an old manager try...I tried just telling him to back off first, but he didn't listen. So I played the long game, recorded everything he did or said, had several "off the record" chats with HR and another manager about it, explaining how upset it was making me. I did also used to wind him up on purpose, but always being careful to stay within the boundaries of my contract and acceptable conduct guidelines ...he was a chauvinistic little c*nt that used to openly say that women shouldn't be in that male dominated environment, so I knew he'd always react and give me more evidence to support my case. I pulled the ace out of my sleeve when I got signed off with "stress", had a 3 month holiday on full pay, and met with HR to inform them that I would continue to put in sick notes until they changed my line of reporting. They couldn't really do anything else because of the documentation I'd provided and previous times I'd raised it with them.

He was absolutely fuming when I returned to work, but had to force himself to be nice to me

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By *ornym66Man
over a year ago

Col /ips

"I had an old manager try...I tried just telling him to back off first, but he didn't listen. So I played the long game, recorded everything he did or said, had several "off the record" chats with HR and another manager about it, explaining how upset it was making me. I did also used to wind him up on purpose, but always being careful to stay within the boundaries of my contract and acceptable conduct guidelines ...he was a chauvinistic little c*nt that used to openly say that women shouldn't be in that male dominated environment, so I knew he'd always react and give me more evidence to support my case. I pulled the ace out of my sleeve when I got signed off with "stress", had a 3 month holiday on full pay, and met with HR to inform them that I would continue to put in sick notes until they changed my line of reporting. They couldn't really do anything else because of the documentation I'd provided and previous times I'd raised it with them.

He was absolutely fuming when I returned to work, but had to force himself to be nice to me

Good for you well done

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By *ablo minibar123Woman
over a year ago

"I don't know if it was bullying really, but either way it made my work day a misery so I found something else and am now much happier

Please explain to use your story"

A manager constantly on my back for stupid things and sending messages to me even on my day off threatening disciplinary action as I've left a coat hanging in the wrong position for example

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

30 years ago as a young man I had a manager verbally abusing me every day I was losing confidence and dreading getting up for work.

Well the day came when I seen him clutching his chest in agony do I help or go out the office?

I helped him two months later he came back to work after recovering from his heart attack he thanked me for helping him in his time of crisis.

That’s when I just lost it and told him I nearly walked out of the office as he was such a bastard to me over the time I started working in his office.

His face was a picture never spoke to me in a bullying manner again.

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By *iltsTSgirlTV/TS
over a year ago

chichester

I had a male boss , little skinny prick of a man with ego issues ,, try bully me as he bullied all his sale staff ...they were all younger people so nervous of him ..

one meeting he was ranting shouting , then singled me out and screamed in my face spit drooling out and called me a stupid cunt and poked me in the chest , I head butted him much to the delight of my younger sales peers ..

when I picked him up and sat him on the chair we had stern words .. I didn't last long that day though and had to resign .. guy was white as a ghost and genuinely thought I was going to snap his spine or something .. tempting indeed ..

unfortunately for him he had to take his licks as he had physically assaulted me infront of 9 other people by poking me ...so he never took it further , I just got paid out money to leave ..

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By *g and funnyCouple
over a year ago

Clacton

""Banter" is the worst excuse in the world; even more so to cover up veiled insults and verbal aggression in the workplace.

Bully or be bullied is their motto"

Thats a very black or white way of looking at things and not accurate especially not in situations like the construction industry.

I (Mr) have worked on building sites and also inside the banking industry, and have seen far more bullying take place inside the office setting, usually of a more vicious nature as well, than by what you class as a rough neck alpha male.

Mainly on building sites and such, all the piss taking, swearing at each other etc is just banter, a way of relieving stress between friends during work.

Some people do take things to far and that isn't acceptable, but from my pwn experience that isn't the norm and usually dealt with quickly and effectively.

Its hard to understand how much the language and names is all part and parcel of the work environment unless you've actually worked in construction or the building industry. From the outside it looks awful, but is different from the inside.

In an office you wouldn't go up to your manager and say "oi you old lazy bastard fancy a coffee" but on site its almost a term of endearment.

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By *hrough the looking gla55Couple
over a year ago

Epsom

I experienced bully and the day I handed in my notice was the best feeling ever. Especially when they tried to offer more money

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By *elaninMaverickWoman
over a year ago

near Putney Heath

"Has anyone of you in your Adult life encountered Bullying or have been bullied by either individuals or Managers. Plus what was the outcome?"

++++++++++++++TRIGGER WARNING+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

I don't do well being bullied. I let people know upfront. "Don't bully me or I will lose my shit and if I lose my shit, it will be very unpleasant for you." It's not a threat, it's a real warning of what happens when I'm treated badly by people.

I have BPD/EUPD with possible autistic traits. My meltdowns are not pretty and the more serious ones require ambulance and police to section me.

I once had a terrible meltdown and accidentally smashed something, sliced myself open by grabbing said smashed item and covered the entire communal area in red. Then proceeded to run out in public covered in red and considered legging it from the police but decided not to as I might have exsanguinated myself.

Mostly I keep to myself on bad days, express anything that is distressing me in support group and let people know upfront I'm unhappy and that their behaviour is a possible trigger. I don't intend to traumatise people with my meltdowns but it can happen so it's only fair to give a warning.

Management usually re-coil in fear when I tell them my mental illness is a disability and they need to not ride my balls so hard like they do with other people.

crazy trumps bully every time. lol!

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By *elaninMaverickWoman
over a year ago

near Putney Heath

"I was bullied in my first year at secondary school by this large lad in the 4th year I hated school I would lock my self in the bathroom to miss the bus my parents spoke to his cousin it stopped after that then years later at that school I saw a young boy been bullied by third year boys I was in my 5th year I looked out for him after that "

I was bullied in school until I started to lose my shit...that was the beginning of the end for the bullies.

Apparently, I'm absolutely terrifying when I lose my shit probably because I do things completely out of character.

One girl who I'm now adult friends with remembers a time that she knocked my pencil case off my desk and sent everything flying. I lost my shit and walked off to the art room and didn't go to any of my classes for the rest of the day. No one knew where I went and I was never one to not go to classes. This happened when we were 16 and the grown up lady apologise when we were 40 for being a bully. It stamped a memory on her that if you treat people badly.....they might do something drastic and out of character....that you don't see coming.

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By *elaninMaverickWoman
over a year ago

near Putney Heath

"30 years ago as a young man I had a manager verbally abusing me every day I was losing confidence and dreading getting up for work.

Well the day came when I seen him clutching his chest in agony do I help or go out the office?

I helped him two months later he came back to work after recovering from his heart attack he thanked me for helping him in his time of crisis.

That’s when I just lost it and told him I nearly walked out of the office as he was such a bastard to me over the time I started working in his office.

His face was a picture never spoke to me in a bullying manner again. "

Classic and duly deserved. I have to let new management know not to mess with me because I have a mental illness disability requiring the reasonable adjustment of them not to bully me. The last 2 quit. lol!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes. I unknowingly accepted a job where my ex's sister would be my boss. We had split on reasonable terms so I'm not sure what her issue was but she'd give me the shitty jobs to do and I'd hear her bitching about me if I walked past.

Luckily I got a new job after a month and didn't even phone her to say I'd not be back. I got a small sense of satisfaction knowing she'd have to stay on late and cover for me.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I was bullied in school until I started to lose my shit...that was the beginning of the end for the bullies.

Apparently, I'm absolutely terrifying when I lose my shit probably because I do things completely out of character.

Thankyou for sharing your stories. It appears I've unlocked a world of difficulties that people are experiencing daily in their lives. Dealing with bullying is difficult. Not everyone sees it your way for many reasons.The truth is that it can badly affect a person's performance and wellbeing. It can trigger anxiety and many other personal issues. I'm glad I opened this thread as it definitely spurs me on to help others.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

He was absolutely fuming when I returned to work, but had to force himself to be nice to me

Brilliant and very very happy for your out come

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I had a male boss , little skinny prick of a man with ego issues ,, try bully me as he bullied all his sale staff ...they were all younger people so nervous of him ..

unfortunately for him he had to take his licks as he had physically assaulted me infront of 9 other people by poking me ...so he never took it further , I just got paid out money to leave ..

Treat people as they treat you eh.

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By *offee27Man
over a year ago

Wiltshire

Yes, nearly every job I've held down I've had some form of bullying from either management or other co workers

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By *den-Valley-coupleCouple
over a year ago

Cumbria

"Yes, nearly every job I've held down I've had some form of bullying from either management or other co workers"

Well that sounds like a You problem sometimes may need to look at yourself,

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By *uddy laneMan
over a year ago

dudley

"Yes, nearly every job I've held down I've had some form of bullying from either management or other co workers

Well that sounds like a You problem sometimes may need to look at yourself, "

I agree.

Work life is like a black smiths, when you are the anvil you bear the blows and when you are the hammer you strike hard.

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By *inky_couple2020Couple
over a year ago

North West

I left a job in a lab because of fabricated complaints and total lies being fed to managers about me. It cemented two things. One, I wasn't going to continue in labs and two, I would seek to avoid all/predominantly-women workplaces because the atmosphere was toxic. I am a woman, btw.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I left a job in a lab because of fabricated complaints and total lies being fed to managers about me. It cemented two things. One, I wasn't going to continue in labs and two, I would seek to avoid all/predominantly-women workplaces because the atmosphere was toxic. I am a woman, btw. "

Something similar happened to me. However I went above them and gave management my account of the issue and they said your story is different to what they told me.pretty embarrassing for them.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Yes, nearly every job I've held down I've had some form of bullying from either management or other co workers"

Maybe you are a different personality that others see your vulnerabilitys as a weakness.sad people who do this

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By *offee27Man
over a year ago

Wiltshire

"Yes, nearly every job I've held down I've had some form of bullying from either management or other co workers

Maybe you are a different personality that others see your vulnerabilitys as a weakness.sad people who do this "

Unfortunately I am very different to other people, I have autism and very much an introvert. I don't like working in teams etc. Luckily now I have a job where I work very isolated about 95% of the time and my current boss is impressed with my work and has no issues

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Yes I left at 15 year job because of it "

What did you do about it?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Yes, nearly every job I've held down I've had some form of bullying from either management or other co workers

Maybe you are a different personality that others see your vulnerabilitys as a weakness.sad people who do this

Who has said your introverted? Why not try doing a personality test?

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By *tephTV67TV/TS
over a year ago

Cheshire

In the Army when a sergeant found out my Dad was from Northern Ireland. I was an Irish this and that, latrine duty, KP, guard duty at the weekend, plenty of beastings for minor issues.

I fucking hated him and I had access to weapons.

Eventually he ended up being transferred elsewhere I never found out why or where. But my service became a lot less hectic and horrendous afterwards.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"In the Army when a sergeant found out my Dad was from Northern Ireland. I was an Irish this and that, latrine duty, KP, guard duty at the weekend, plenty of beastings for minor issues.

I fucking hated him and I had access to weapons.

Eventually he ended up being transferred elsewhere I never found out why or where. But my service became a lot less hectic and horrendous afterwards.

Again management bullying. Responsibility isn't power but these kinda of people and their egos become inflated and think their bullet proof. No pun intended

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By *andyfloss2000Woman
over a year ago

ashford

Our managers Bully us to a degree everyday! Or my co workers call it bulling I'm not so sure it's quite that myself! More harassing I would say! That said one of the girls was crying today about it so fine line I think x

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By *atnip make me purrWoman
over a year ago

Reading

Yes I was changed to another team and she left.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Our managers Bully us to a degree everyday! Or my co workers call it bulling I'm not so sure it's quite that myself! More harassing I would say! That said one of the girls was crying today about it so fine line I think x"

Bullying how?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Yes I was changed to another team and she left. "

So it affects your working life coz of a bully and you get removed to another team. That's not managing an issue that's moving it along. Managers are poor at managing people's issues and thats part of the job

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By *andyfloss2000Woman
over a year ago

ashford

Bullying how?"

Was on our yammer I didn't witness it! A young lady returned from maternity leave 4 weeks ago! Apparently a manager shouted down the isle at her that she has not achieved since being back 4 weeks! And u have had a year of! In front of customers and other staff! Weather its exaggeration I don't know the shouting bit! I do know we are constantly told through our shift if we are not achieving! Had it Monday myself! Did OK today another colleague told me she was told 3 times today she not achieving in end she said I know I'm not! U keep telling me so is not helpfull! It is pretty dire there at mo x

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Bullying how?

Sounds like your being mistreated. Your not dogs. Do you have a union or someone to speak to who can intervene?

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By *nliveneTV/TS
over a year ago

Selby

People who have bullied me or treated me wrong at work , mostly this last two years i only wish them well as i have no sense of revenge on me .

It hurts because mostly comes from a friend i would never expect , listening recorded conversations about me , stabbing me on my back really shows how fake and dangerous people can be !

Like i said i don't and i never had sense of revenge in my life towards to anyone and i will never have no matter how deep can hurt me , i just let go and i never look back , is my aproach and that's okay

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By *andyfloss2000Woman
over a year ago

ashford

Bullying how?

Sounds like your being mistreated. Your not dogs. Do you have a union or someone to speak to who can intervene?"

Think it's getting to the point something needs saying we need enough of us to b on same page with it and all say something! And this is not a small company it's a large supermarket x

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Bullying how?

Sounds like your being mistreated. Your not dogs. Do you have a union or someone to speak to who can intervene?

Think it's getting to the point something needs saying we need enough of us to b on same page with it and all say something! And this is not a small company it's a large supermarket x"

What the manager is doing is putting you and the rest of your colleagues under pressure. The store has targets and if the manager doesn't meet his employers star's then he/she is out. All of you stick together and don't let the manager bully. If the manager gets one of you on their own then that individual needs to have the balls to get everyone in the office to listen to the manager.hence all stick together. I'm thinking there's a union then as its a large supermarket

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By *andyfloss2000Woman
over a year ago

ashford

Bullying how?

Sounds like your being mistreated. Your not dogs. Do you have a union or someone to speak to who can intervene?

Think it's getting to the point something needs saying we need enough of us to b on same page with it and all say something! And this is not a small company it's a large supermarket x

Yes I say to others the managers are getting it in neck from above its a circle and yes b Usdaw we have no union rep anymore there but can go straight through unions I been in and out of Usdaw over years I have 10 months till retirement so wouldn't rejoin at this stage but others should x

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By *oppolocosTV/TS
over a year ago

inverurie

""Banter" is the worst excuse in the world; even more so to cover up veiled insults and verbal aggression in the workplace."

Banter is fun, it greases the wheels of personal interaction. The dividing line between banter and bullying is when someone involved can't answer back, can't give others some banter.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Bullying how?

Sounds like your being mistreated. Your not dogs. Do you have a union or someone to speak to who can intervene?

Think it's getting to the point something needs saying we need enough of us to b on same page with it and all say something! And this is not a small company it's a large supermarket x

Somebody needs to take on the rep responsibility. That way it hives management something to fear if they are being watched.

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By *ohn KanakaMan
over a year ago

Not all that North of North London

"Yes, nearly every job I've held down I've had some form of bullying from either management or other co workers

Maybe you are a different personality that others see your vulnerabilitys as a weakness.sad people who do this

I relate a lot with this, I'm glad you've found a job that recognises your uniqueness and supports you, it makes a huge difference doesn't it?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Worked with some nightmare brickie foreman's in the past who were relentless bullies.

Also witnessed a few bullying foreman's flat out on the scaffold.

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By *iltsTSgirlTV/TS
over a year ago

chichester

"I had a male boss , little skinny prick of a man with ego issues ,, try bully me as he bullied all his sale staff ...they were all younger people so nervous of him ..

unfortunately for him he had to take his licks as he had physically assaulted me infront of 9 other people by poking me ...so he never took it further , I just got paid out money to leave ..

Treat people as they treat you eh. "

Absolutely it’s called reflection

physically assault me as he did . Then I will touch the person back just in a more focussed absolute manner .

Bully types are insects so need crushing anyway , I see it merely as illuminating someone to a flaw in their ways

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By *iltsTSgirlTV/TS
over a year ago

chichester

"Worked with some nightmare brickie foreman's in the past who were relentless bullies.

Also witnessed a few bullying foreman's flat out on the scaffold.

Yes my dad has many funny stories from his younger years about things like this. Laying out aggressive bullying site managers / bosses from engineering / construction industry …

We saw some construction chaps having a punch up on Thursday in Swindon on a roof There was rather a lot of swearing and crowd watching below

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Worked with some nightmare brickie foreman's in the past who were relentless bullies.

Also witnessed a few bullying foreman's flat out on the scaffold.

Yes my dad has many funny stories from his younger years about things like this. Laying out aggressive bullying site managers / bosses from engineering / construction industry …

We saw some construction chaps having a punch up on Thursday in Swindon on a roof There was rather a lot of swearing and crowd watching below

Must of been them Park North lot.

Bit rough round the edges them lot.

Actually i've worked with a lot of them on sites over the years...good bunch of lads.

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By *arrapsMan
over a year ago

port talbot

Yep , we had a new manager and at the first meeting he announced that if he could he’d sack everyone.

Needless to say we hated the twat. He tried picking on me a few times and the outcome was always the same, I stood right in his face and called him a bastard and a bully. funny enough when he left the company we were on good working terms

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By *omez42Man
over a year ago

gloucester

I was bullied out of a job and suffered a breakdown, but I did mange to take the bully down with me.

I've witnessed and called out several bullies in my time.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I was bullied out of a job and suffered a breakdown, but I did mange to take the bully down with me.

I've witnessed and called out several bullies in my time."

Tell us more please

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By *omez42Man
over a year ago

gloucester

The finance director openly bullied me in front of other staff. Imagine you are the accounts manager, a new software system that took 18 months to implement is to be rolled out on Monday.I found out on saturday that it had been postponed!

When I woke up to take a kitchen knife to my wrists, the time was up. During my time off work, she sent me an official warning because some records were missing. She had suggested taking the records off site for a temp to put onto the new system, then blamed me!

I knew that she was heading out of the country, and I also knew that the company owner would open a birthday card addressed to a member of his staff if it hit his postbox. I wrote my resignation letter to her, pointing out her failings, knowing full well that the MD would read it. She was gone within a month.

As for seeing bullying, I was the one of two that spoke up when a Polish girl was getting abused. I also set a trap to prove who was bullying someone else, then the manager couldn't ignore it as I had handwritten evidence from the bully.

I'm not a grass, if the bullies didn't do anything wrong, they wouldn't be in trouble.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Yes my last manager bullied me over a period of years, most of it was low level then I found out I was autistic and he made my life hell. I resigned after 3 months off sick and multiple suicide attempts.

Currently in contact with the the CEO of the Local Authority about the treatment I received. ACAS are involved at early conciliation stage. Personal injury lawyers are also on standby.

I couldn't care less about the compensation I may get. I just want to see him held accountable and bring a whole heap of grief to his world"

Jesus mate, I hope you're doing okay now.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"The finance director openly bullied me in front of other staff. Imagine you are the accounts manager, a new software system that took 18 months to implement is to be rolled out on Monday.I found out on saturday that it had been postponed!

I'm not a grass, if the bullies didn't do anything wrong, they wouldn't be in trouble."

Thanks for your story and absolutely correct. I hope everything is OK in your life now.

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By *ohn KanakaMan
over a year ago

Not all that North of North London

Currently in contact with the the CEO of the Local Authority about the treatment I received. ACAS are involved at early conciliation stage. Personal injury lawyers are also on standby.

I couldn't care less about the compensation I may get. I just want to see him held accountable and bring a whole heap of grief to his world

Jesus mate, I hope you're doing okay now."

Thank you

I'm doing okay, started a new job where they really like me. Sadly the trauma of the last 6 months isn't sonething I will easily recover from but I'm aware that I can use the experience to shape a better me.

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By *MisschiefxTV/TS
over a year ago

London

I was bullied everyday at school and it was beyond miserable so now in my adult life I have 0 patients or tolerance of it towards me or people around me. I'm also in a management position in my career so have a lot of influence over the tone of my work environment and now have the confidence and wit to shut down bullies as soon as they try and raise their head.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Currently in contact with the the CEO of the Local Authority about the treatment I received. ACAS are involved at early conciliation stage. Personal injury lawyers are also on standby.

I couldn't care less about the compensation I may get. I just want to see him held accountable and bring a whole heap of grief to his world

Jesus mate, I hope you're doing okay now.

Thank you

Glad to hear you're in a better place. It may be a long road but I hope you find your way

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I was bullied everyday at school and it was beyond miserable so now in my adult life I have 0 patients or tolerance of it towards me or people around me. I'm also in a management position in my career so have a lot of influence over the tone of my work environment and now have the confidence and wit to shut down bullies as soon as they try and raise their head.

Superb as stats show its managers that do most of the bullying

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When l was an apprentice if we made a mistake we got whacked on the hand with a metal ruler, shocking now l think back to those days

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Yes, once. I left the job despite a senior manager offering to 'have a word'.

I have offered to support colleagues who I've noticed are experiencing bullying "

Was fortunate enough to be given my first role as a senior manager 10yrs ago. After 6 months of noticing wee things here and there. I tried to call out bullying from management in other departments towards their staff.

Being of quite strong character I didn't feel bullied. But as nothing was changing. I felt I had no option but to leave. I have regretted that decision ever since. I feel I let the folk I left behind down. Since then I have made a point in "sticking up" for my men at every turn. Hopefully no-one will ever feel uncomfortable or that dread of coming to work under my supervision ever again.

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By *omez42Man
over a year ago

gloucester

Thankyou.

It was a long time ago, last millenium!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Yes, once. I left the job despite a senior manager offering to 'have a word'.

I have offered to support colleagues who I've noticed are experiencing bullying

How did you call them out?

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By *heonix_flamesWoman
over a year ago

Midlands

Yes, bullying and discrimination. HR didn’t care and the CEO didn’t care. I was told to leave if I didn’t like it- so I did.

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By *haggydogMan
over a year ago

Brooklands/London

Yes.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I was bullied by a manager... I wouldn't care if it was physical as I'd tell him where to go. But when they use their senior position over you. best thing you can do is leave. No one deserves to be bullied in any walk of life. To be bullied at work is a massive failing of an employer.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Yes, once. I left the job despite a senior manager offering to 'have a word'.

I have offered to support colleagues who I've noticed are experiencing bullying

How did you call them out?"

Brought it up in a management meeting that I thought staff were being intimidated to work late to cover miss organisation by managers in other departments. Was completely shut down and alienated from that moment. So I felt.

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By *rLothbrokMan
over a year ago

Lancs

My last job. One of my colleagues approached me on 2 separate occasions to tell me he felt like he was being bullied by a member of his team, in varying ways. I advised going to appropriate team and report immediately, to get it dealt with. Eventually it was reported but nothing appeared to be getting done. Same individual, the bully, attempted to get me fired raised false complaints about my work, and jobs raised from my investigation reports. Didn’t hold weight, but I specifically mentioned him and that incident in my exit interview to my manager and HR as a major reason for leaving. To my knowledge, the bully is still there despite management knowing he has previous form with bullying.

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By *g1231974Man
over a year ago

wetherby

Currently in contact with the the CEO of the Local Authority about the treatment I received. ACAS are involved at early conciliation stage. Personal injury lawyers are also on standby.

I couldn't care less about the compensation I may get. I just want to see him held accountable and bring a whole heap of grief to his world"

Slightly playing 'devil's advocate' and I'm sure I'll get plenty of comments disagreeing with this.

It feels a little like 'bullying back' saying that you want to 'bring a whole heap of grief to his world'.

Whilst I'm not in any way condoning what that individual may have put you through, I'm not convinced that trying to cause him pain, regardless of any situation that he may be in, is the ideal outcome.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When mortgage rates were 16.5% people were worried about losing jobs ,one employer l worked for used threats and intimidation, sexual bullying, all sorts ,l was there a week and it was rife ,everyone was scared to do or say anything ,the boss booted me up the backside one morning, send me flying , he was a huge guy so l could only jab him the chest, told him all the others were scared of standing up to him, took him to a tribunal and won ,they had a file on him 2 inch thick .l heard he threw a filing cabinet out the 1st floor window and hit the cleaning lady ,putting her in hospital ,wouldnt happen nowadays.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"When mortgage rates were 16.5% people were worried about losing jobs ,one employer l worked for used threats and intimidation, sexual bullying, all sorts ,l was there a week and it was rife ,everyone was scared to do or say anything ,the boss booted me up the backside one morning, send me flying , he was a huge guy so l could only jab him the chest, told him all the others were scared of standing up to him, took him to a tribunal and won ,they had a file on him 2 inch thick .l heard he threw a filing cabinet out the 1st floor window and hit the cleaning lady ,putting her in hospital ,wouldnt happen nowadays."

If he was a big guy, was ge a body builder type big guy? If so he could of been on steroids and that would answer a few questions about his aggressive behaviour

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By *ustamanMan
over a year ago

weymouth

"Has anyone of you in your Adult life encountered Bullying or have been bullied by either individuals or Managers. Plus what was the outcome?"

Yes, those responsible were ejected from the club -eventually after following protocol

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By *wingin CatMan
over a year ago

London

Currently in contact with the the CEO of the Local Authority about the treatment I received. ACAS are involved at early conciliation stage. Personal injury lawyers are also on standby.

I couldn't care less about the compensation I may get. I just want to see him held accountable and bring a whole heap of grief to his world

Slightly playing 'devil's advocate' and I'm sure I'll get plenty of comments disagreeing with this.

It feels a little like 'bullying back' saying that you want to 'bring a whole heap of grief to his world'.

Why not? They should be made to suffer in exactly the same way (if not worse), to show them exactly the damage caused by their actions.

Anyone who can refer to it as "bullying back" rings warning bells that they're more likely trying to defend the perpetrator.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Administrative bullying at work, punishment postings, that kind of thing, yes, in the past. Abuse of authority really, but no-one gives a fuck.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

morning, send me flying , he was a huge guy so l could only jab him the chest, told him all the others were scared of standing up to him, took him to a tribunal and won ,they had a file on him 2 inch thick .l heard he threw a filing cabinet out the 1st floor window and hit the cleaning lady ,putting her in hospital ,wouldnt happen nowadays.

If he was a big guy, was ge a body builder type big guy? If so he could of been on steroids and that would answer a few questions about his aggressive behaviour "

He was a boozer ,his reputation went back to the days of the M1 being built, not much work about, he was always having a go at everybody ,the working week started thur cos he knew no one would come back mon ,so he didnt pay em for 2 days .

We had to do compulsory overtime ,undeclared hours ,everything ,lm surprised l lasted a week

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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago

Dubai & Nottingham

Never experienced this. I find it hard to imagine how or why a person who bullies would survive in the type of companies I work at. They obviously have other issues if they are bullying and so wouldn’t last 5 minutes, or everyone else would just leave.

How does this happen in the uk ? I’m guessing it’s companies where lots of people people don’t want to be there , aren’t loyal etc so managers are the dregs and misfits that no other companies want ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

As l mentioned earlier ,it was early 80's ,interest rates very high ,people scared of losing jobs , the building trade is tough as mentioned in other threads, the regular workers were treated better, newcomers didnt stay around long ,just needed short time ,it was the worst experience l have been through.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Never experienced this. I find it hard to imagine how or why a person who bullies would survive in the type of companies I work at. They obviously have other issues if they are bullying and so wouldn’t last 5 minutes, or everyone else would just leave.

All the above is a definitely not.you would be surprised who what where and when Bullying occurs. It comes in many forms and from many different issues.Your age, sex, colour, promotions etc can all get you into an issue of getting bullied and those are just a few issues off the top of my head.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Administrative bullying at work, punishment postings, that kind of thing, yes, in the past. Abuse of authority really, but no-one gives a fuck."

Management at all levels thinks they have power over people. It's not power its responsibility but their egos take over and clouds their judgment coz nobody challenges these dick heads, so they carry on regardless

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By *urls and DressesWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere near here

I was training within the NHS, my field is very known for bullying across the country. Unfortunately I fell victim of it, i became very ill mentally and physically because of it. I didn’t have the strength to stand up to it, I was petrified of the repercussions, I walked away and now in a far far better place.

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By *ubal1Man
over a year ago

Newry Down

To obviate the possibility that anyone would ever think about bullying you, at the very first inkling of disrespectful behaviour kick back as hard as possible, verbally, and record all interactions.

Bullies are generally weak at their core; if the culture of the business is for bullying to be an acceptedode of interaction then plan to get out.

There is a massive amount of material on google video about mobbing, and on google about bullying.

Educate yourself, rehearse with family and friends and develop a reputation for not being a walkover; the bully will quickly realise that you are not worth the hassle; then follow thru to reinforce your no bullshit attitude.

This won't work every time, just in the majority of incidences!

Fight back!

Watch the original Casey Heynes video on YouTube.

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By *ubal1Man
over a year ago

Newry Down

An excellent resource for anyone suffering from bullying at work, or elsewhere are the videos by Claire Hunt Bullying on Google Video, which are supported by written material that can be downloaded.

A fantastic resource from Claire Hunt who is very forthright and also personally experienced!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"To obviate the possibility that anyone would ever think about bullying you, at the very first inkling of disrespectful behaviour kick back as hard as possible, verbally, and record all interactions.

Bullies are generally weak at their core; if the culture of the business is for bullying to be an acceptedode of interaction then plan to get out.

There is a massive amount of material on google video about mobbing, and on google about bullying.

This won't work every time, just in the majority of incidences!

Fight back!

Watch the original Casey Heynes video on YouTube."

Never ever give in to a bully. If they want a reaction, then they will get one they can't handle. Then watch after for the after shocks.They come in the form of passive aggressive so be ready for it. However if you have done your home work then bring it up and warn the bully before it happens. The bully will be exploding that they have no other options.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I was training within the NHS, my field is very known for bullying across the country. Unfortunately I fell victim of it, i became very ill mentally and physically because of it. I didn’t have the strength to stand up to it, I was petrified of the repercussions, I walked away and now in a far far better place. "

Can you name your field you were training for?

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By *elaninMaverickWoman
over a year ago

near Putney Heath

Oh you mean a sociopath....

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By *urls and DressesWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere near here

Can you name your field you were training for? "

Midwifery

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Can you name your field you were training for?

Midwifery "

That did cross my mind straight away for some reason. What kind of Bullying was it?

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By *ubal1Man
over a year ago

Newry Down

Bullying is epidemic in all organisations; it has been rife in everyone of the businesses in which I worked, and the problem is getting worse, everywhere.

Educate yourself and plan ahead for the first and subsequent encounters; bullies range from the unc#nscious incompetent to the skilled and highly experienced narcissistic psychopathic Machiavellian who has all the Dark Triad traits.

Mobbing is the phenomenon of being bullied by a group of bullies, led by a chief manipulator.

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By *wingin CatMan
over a year ago

London

[Removed by poster at 20/09/22 09:22:15]

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By *wingin CatMan
over a year ago

London

I think that a Business and Workplace Law module should be taught in secondary schools in the final year of the curriculum. Hopefully, it should prepare 15-16 year olds to face the outside world of work, how to deal with workplace bullies, disputes, how to avoid being exploited as a 16-year-old in their first job, and resolutions available to the employee in such cases.

It's something I could have done with before starting my first job at 16, and being expected to make tea and run errands.

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By *ilfCrumpet9Man
over a year ago

Wirral

Bullied verbally, physically and mentally as a child because of the colour of my skin made me different. Turning point came in secondary school because I couldn't stand it anymore.

Since then I stand my ground and make it very clear I will not tolerate any form of bullying regardless of who it's coming from. I have also stood up to others being bullied.

In a place of work we all have a duty of care including those in charge, bullying IS NOT ACCEPTABLE.

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By *wingin CatMan
over a year ago

London

"Bullied verbally, physically and mentally as a child because of the colour of my skin made me different. Turning point came in secondary school because I couldn't stand it anymore.

Since then I stand my ground and make it very clear I will not tolerate any form of bullying regardless of who it's coming from. I have also stood up to others being bullied.

In a place of work we all have a duty of care including those in charge, bullying IS NOT ACCEPTABLE.

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By *ndiiiMan
over a year ago

Paisley Scotland

Dignity at work and elsewhere ….

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Bullied verbally, physically and mentally as a child because of the colour of my skin made me different. Turning point came in secondary school because I couldn't stand it anymore.

Since then I stand my ground and make it very clear I will not tolerate any form of bullying regardless of who it's coming from. I have also stood up to others being bullied.

In a place of work we all have a duty of care including those in charge, bullying IS NOT ACCEPTABLE.

Very very correct and noble of you to stand another person's ground for them

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I think that a Business and Workplace Law module should be taught in secondary schools in the final year of the curriculum. Hopefully, it should prepare 15-16 year olds to face the outside world of work, how to deal with workplace bullies, disputes, how to avoid being exploited as a 16-year-old in their first job, and resolutions available to the employee in such cases.

It's something I could have done with before starting my first job at 16, and being expected to make tea and run errands."

A very good idea however the curriculum probably hasn't got room for it.I do agree though that they should give young adults a heads up on these matters.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Bullying is epidemic in all organisations; it has been rife in everyone of the businesses in which I worked, and the problem is getting worse, everywhere.

Mobbing is the phenomenon of being bullied by a group of bullies, led by a chief manipulator. "

Small groups or pairs can gang up on you if you let them. If things like that happen then remove yourself quickly if you can.

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By *asha86Couple
over a year ago

walsall

I was bullied personally by a former manager who took it upon herself to be demeaning and condescending in front of other members of staff and failed to carry out training or support when needed. She was swiftly reported to more senior managers and it was in process of been dealt with at hr and she quit beginning of covid lockdowns.

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By *ubal1Man
over a year ago

Newry Down

"I was bullied personally by a former manager who took it upon herself to be demeaning and condescending in front of other members of staff and failed to carry out training or support when needed. She was swiftly reported to more senior managers and it was in process of been dealt with at hr and she quit beginning of covid lockdowns. "

HR, Human Resources, or PM, Personnel Management or Department very often are ineffectual at dealing with issues such as being bullied, mobbed, harassed, etc., because the bully is often in a position of power in the organisation or has personal power, such as being charismatic or having useful contacts to call upon: kissing up and kicking down!

Very complex subject which I have been studying for many years: Google Lehmann's list of common bullying categories, but a bully with a target in her or his sights can be very creative in their ways of humiliating their target.

Forewarned is forearmed!

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By *ubal1Man
over a year ago

Newry Down

The WBI,Workplace Byllying Institute, devised by Ruth and Gary Namie has a lot of very informative info online about all aspects of bullying and mobbing.

Their podcasts are worth listening to, as are their videos.

Claire Hunt's videos and thesis is very useful.

Google Scholar has superb research material, especially from Sweden.

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By *uxom redCouple
over a year ago

Shrewsbury

Yes, I was bullied by one woman same job as me. I put a grevence in and nothing happened she still a bully. I've since left that job and and much happier.

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By *offee27Man
over a year ago

Wiltshire

"Yes, I was bullied by one woman same job as me. I put a grevence in and nothing happened she still a bully. I've since left that job and and much happier. "

Good for you. Had a similar experience at my last place. Person in question had been working there for 20+ years, works less hours and gets easier work, but he targeted me and claimed I was lazy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Bullys put so much effort in upsetting others ,getting their own way ,covering their own backs that it would be easier if they just got on with their job without upsetting fellow workers ,it amazes me ,they get picked by their superiours and so get backed up otherwise it shows bad judgment from the bosses in picking them in the first place.

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By *ubal1Man
over a year ago

Newry Down

For any young swingers on this site, I would suggest the following: learn as much as you can about what bullying is and how to preempt it, prevent it and make yourself bullyproof.

It is getting worse: more pervasive, more aggressive in some instances, and more subtle, sophisticated and difficult to detect in others.

Your first contact with your bully is the most crucial; they are sizing you up as a target; make them realise that you are no walkover and expect mutual respect, but if it is not forthcoming, then you can and shall kick ass

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Bullys put so much effort in upsetting others ,getting their own way ,covering their own backs that it would be easier if they just got on with their job without upsetting fellow workers ,it amazes me ,they get picked by their superiours and so get backed up otherwise it shows bad judgment from the bosses in picking them in the first place.

They get promoted by managers as the managers see them and use them to get the work done. Bullying into submission untill they are reported then managers reply they didn't know anything about it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I was given a worker to help me ,he was never there ,l had to cover the work ,it came out that the supervisor was taking him on private jobs for himself ,unbelievable ,got away with it until the firm went through, cheeky sod then asked me for work! It was bad in the 80's and 90's before mobiles and the net .

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By *ubal1Man
over a year ago

Newry Down

Bullies come in all shapes and sizes and are infinitely creative; if one crosses your path at work, get out as rapidly as possible.

Their personality disorder is incurable and treatment usually takes them worse.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Bullies come in all shapes and sizes and are infinitely creative; if one crosses your path at work, get out as rapidly as possible.

Their personality disorder is incurable and treatment usually takes them worse. "

Do you think bullies are a form of Narcissistic behaviour?

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By *ubal1Man
over a year ago

Newry Down

For a very effective way of dealing with a bully, watch the Casey Heynes video online of a young schoolkid who got fed up of being tormented by a bully, half his size; and the Casey Heynes appearance on the Justin Bieber concert in Oz!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"For a very effective way of dealing with a bully, watch the Casey Heynes video online of a young schoolkid who got fed up of being tormented by a bully, half his size; and the Casey Heynes appearance on the Justin Bieber concert in Oz!"

Seen it. Ouch

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