FabSwingers.com forum: Do you feel it's a waste of your time

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

If you don't have sex on a social/first meet?

I'm assuming most people here will say no but I have a feeling this is where I'm going wrong, ie insisting on drinks first.

(I have met guys in the past who are OK with socials only btw, this isn't a "woe is me, all men are shit" thread)

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By *parkle1974Woman
over a year ago

Leeds

I never have and never will have sex on the first meet, it says on my profile. If people don't like it then they are free to message the plenty of others that do x

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By *rwhowhatwherewhyMan
over a year ago

Aylesbury

"If you don't have sex on a social/first meet?

I'm assuming most people here will say no but I have a feeling this is where I'm going wrong, ie insisting on drinks first.

(I have met guys in the past who are OK with socials only btw, this isn't a "woe is me, all men are shit" thread) "

All men are shit though, just saying

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By *annaBeStrongMan
over a year ago

wokingham

Depends where from. If from here then yes. From the apps then no, as I’m looking for more from there

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By *uke olovingmanMan
over a year ago

Gravesend

I've had sex a few times on a first date...totally on the spur of the moment..apart from the meeting at eurekas

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By *ora the explorerWoman
over a year ago

Paradise, Herts

I only ever meet for a social. They always know it will just be that so I guess if they’re wasting their time they’re actually choosing to. Up to them.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sometimes it happens, sometimes it dont, depends how far each is willing to take the flirting. I dont expect or initiate i want sex on a first meet at all, but sometimes it just happens. I'm pretty good at reading body language and playing the game

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By *nliveneTV/TS
over a year ago

Selby

Not a waste of time at all in my opinion unless you had intentions and desire of having sex or you had another meeting that you have turned down that you sure would have lead to a sex meeting

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Strictly social first meet only for me

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

No I don't feel it's a waste of my time. The people we meet might.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Social first ... expecting sex on a first meet just shows a sense of entitlement - we have done social with a few people who seemed to automatically expect we were all going to have sex ...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Naaa sometimes its more fun not too i want to laugh more than thrust my willy altho if i dont laugh or thust my willy then i get a lot moody

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

All Rosie’s hotwife meets have been social only first time around. She needs to feel a physical attraction.

Our (very few) meets as a couple have usually been a social with no expectation that’s gone back to a room

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By *ealitybitesMan
over a year ago

Belfast

As my profile says, I insist on a social and it will always remain as a social only so there is never any disappointment or time wasted unless they feel that way.

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By *gent CoulsonMan
over a year ago

Secret hideaway in the pennines

It cuts both ways really, prefer a social only first.

It's one thing to chat on here, but if the spark isn't there when you are face to face, it ain't going to work

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have nothing against play on a first meet, my time can be quite limited sometimes so I’ve got to make the most of what opportunity I have but at same time, I’d never say a social is wasted time either. Only a no-show is wasted time

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By *ohn KanakaMan
over a year ago

Not all that North of North London

I've had socials knowing play would follow if we connected

I've had socials knowing play could happen if it went well.

I've had socials which were only ever going to be a social as a prelude to a second meet.

All work with me though i think ad always honest communication is necessary.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No no wouldn’t I get injoyment just spending time with people

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We don’t do socials. We have young children and finding a babysitter is quite rare so a social would 100% be a waste of our very limited time. That being said, we are a couple that don’t meet alone. If Mrs NE was ever to meet alone I think we’d want at least one social beforehand.

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By *etcplCouple
over a year ago

Gapping Fanny

I always do things I enjoy for socials anyway so I’m never wasting my time.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes kind of is a waste, especially when I don't get to meet often. I always do the social bit in the hotel room and don't meet someone until I'm 100% sure I wanna jump their bones. Worked for me so far.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I never have and never will have sex on the first meet, it says on my profile. If people don't like it then they are free to message the plenty of others that do x"

Same.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I never have and never will have sex on the first meet, it says on my profile. If people don't like it then they are free to message the plenty of others that do x"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Social first ... expecting sex on a first meet just shows a sense of entitlement - we have done social with a few people who seemed to automatically expect we were all going to have sex ... "

When I have arranged a social first meet but they start hinting at sex stuff I just cancel the social and won't ever meet them. We are not compatible and they can meet someone else.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No i dont. Im open to having sex on a first meet. Bitnit doesnt have to happen.

I dont think if its just a social it needs to be a massively long meet so maybe would only set aside an hr or so for a social

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Depends! Although I chat for weeks prior to meeting. If they’re local then social first, if they’re from further afield and we’ve chatted extensively beforehand then I’d do a sex meet and skip the social.

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By *issmorganWoman
over a year ago

Calderdale innit

Not at all ,

It's nice to meet new people & if it leads to more late then all good.if it doesn't that's cool too,there's no harm done having a brew with someone.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I always suggest a social with no expectation of sex, so there is no obligation on either of us to take it further. If nature takes it's course so be it...

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By *host63Man
over a year ago

Bedfont Feltham

While I wouldn't say no to sex on a first meet I woukd not expect it and I find meeting for a drink and getting to know someone is just as much fun.

Shame I am out of your age range I would have loved to have a drink with you.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"(I have met guys in the past who are OK with socials only btw, this isn't a "woe is me, all men are shit" thread) "

I like those threads

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By *hrista BellendWoman
over a year ago

surrounded by twinkly lights

I've done it and wouldn't say I'll never do it again, but I don't go looking for it.

If the chemistry and want is there then

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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago

Dubai & Nottingham

Just do what’s right for you. I generally do socials first without any plans for sex - but it’s not a hard rule, if I know someone well by talking on the phone first and spend a few hours on a social and really connect then occasionally we will , but it’s rare.

Sometimes you just both know and communicate it, sometimes you get home message her and say how much you like her and that you almost invited her back and she says I wish you would have !

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By *eroLondonMan
over a year ago

Mayfair

If I have to answer honestly then I've only ever played once on the first meet, going against the grain of my principles.

However, in this case the lead up, the mind-engaging dialogue, the sexual tension, the voice chats and other harmonising compatibilities made the 'first meet' encounter a foregone conclusion. And it exceeded expectations.

With that said, my default approach is always a platonic social first.

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By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago

South Wales

No, I only met local fellas and if they couldn’t spare me half hour for a coffee then why should I spare them 20 minutes for a shag?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Social are a waste of me time.

I am here for meeting up not for making friends.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What’s sex?

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By *partharmonyCouple
over a year ago

Ruislip

Socials are essential for us.

If you want a social before you consider having sex with somebody, stick to your guns. It's nothing unreasonable. If a guy doesn't want to sit and have a natter with you then I can quite see why you wouldn't want to shag him.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Absolutely not, need to pass the vibe check.

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