FabSwingers.com forum: Things not to do

By *erfectlyPerverted OP Couple
over a year ago

Bristol

Don't attempt to tumble dry a feather pillow that has a rip in it.

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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL

Don't, under any circumstances, put washing up liquid in a dishwasher.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Dont eat lots of cabbage

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Send a filthy message before checking who it's going to.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Don't eat yellow snow

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By *ambozaMan
over a year ago

kilburn park

Fry bacon in the buff

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By *arriLadMan
over a year ago

North West

Don't apply deep heat to a sore muscle then scratch your bollocks without thoroughly washing your hands

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Don't mistake hand sanitizer for lube!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Dont chop a chilly then rub your eyes

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By *erfectlyPerverted OP Couple
over a year ago

Bristol

I've mostly removed the feathers from the tumble dryer (emptied the big Dyson 3 times)

No idea how the tear got in the pillow - I'll be checking every pillow in future before they go in the washing machine or dryer.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Drink in a pub with a flat roof

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Don't put baby in the corner

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By *luebell888Woman
over a year ago

Glasgowish

Put the electric kettle on gas hob to boil.

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By *ampshirehotwifeWoman
over a year ago

Hampshire

Don't run with scissors...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Don't forget to attach a dick pic to every message.

And DON'T go in the virus forum!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Don't run with scissors..."

Damn it! Now I want to play Postal!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Dont go by yazoo....wrong thread

Ill get my coat

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Don't, under any circumstances, put washing up liquid in a dishwasher. "

Been there did it once. What a mess

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Wear underpants made of nettles.

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By *ixedDevilMan
over a year ago

Bootyville

Don't put a fork in the microwave

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By *ympho6969Woman
over a year ago

glasgow

Dont eat yellow snow

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By *erry bull1Man
over a year ago

doncaster

Don’t wipe your arse with a broken bottle

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Piss into a chocolate ashtray on a moving motorbike

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Put the oven on whilst frying pan and poaching pan are still in there. Oh dear!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Dont tie your shoe laces in a revolving door

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Don't come in d*unk and take your make up off with a Mr Muscle wipe

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Don't put a fork in the microwave "

Damn! I was just thinking about doing that too... What about a spoon?!

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By *inaTitzTV/TS
over a year ago

Titz Towers, North Notts

Don't forget your Magic Flying Carpet is tethered to a lamp post above a double yellow line. It's embarrassing watching two traffic wardens trying to jump up to attach a ticket to it.

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By *inkylipsWoman
over a year ago

Debauchery

Don’t screenshot a conversation to send to a friend while on the phone and then send it to the person you had the conversation With

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Don’t screenshot a conversation to send to a friend while on the phone and then send it to the person you had the conversation With

Haha

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Don't put a fork in the microwave

Damn! I was just thinking about doing that too... What about a spoon?!

You can put a spoon in a jug of custard and warm it in the microwave without it blowing up

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By *ud and BryanCouple
over a year ago

Boston, Lincolnshire

Don't attempt to iron a bomb

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By *ud and BryanCouple
over a year ago

Boston, Lincolnshire

Don't try to dig a wine cellar in a boat

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 04/01/21 19:02:35]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Don't use medicated face scrub to wash your baubles in the shower

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Don't, under any circumstances, put washing up liquid in a dishwasher. "

I so want to try that now....

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By *ndecidedMan
over a year ago

London

Self play after giving someone a Vicks rub

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By *implynaughty1Couple
over a year ago

stockport

Don't wear high boots when it's icey out side

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By *ip2Man
over a year ago

Near Maidenhead

"Dont eat lots of cabbage"

That's right, stick to baked beans instead.

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By *reeneggsandsamMan
over a year ago

Perpignan and cap

Cut cucumber in the buff.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Don't put a fork in the microwave

Damn! I was just thinking about doing that too... What about a spoon?!

You can put a spoon in a jug of custard and warm it in the microwave without it blowing up

Oohhh... Interesting!

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By *aughty.little.secretCouple
over a year ago

Bradford

Dont iron naked (men more so) i have experienced this pain years ago

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Don’t put the fucking milk in first.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Don't put a fork in the microwave

Damn! I was just thinking about doing that too... What about a spoon?!

You can put a spoon in a jug of custard and warm it in the microwave without it blowing up

Oohhh... Interesting!

But you can't put marshmallows in for marshmallow surprise as they explode on the roof. Who knew.

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By *moothdickMan
over a year ago

stoke

Don’t shave with a broken bottle

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By *moothdickMan
over a year ago

stoke

Don’t invite a jo bo in yr house for a chat

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By *partharmonyCouple
over a year ago

Ruislip

Don't play the trumpet if you have diarrhoea.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Don't miss your hair with the hair straighteners and get your ear instead

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Dont iron naked (men more so) i have experienced this pain years ago

Me too

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By *aughty.little.secretCouple
over a year ago

Bradford

"Dont iron naked (men more so) i have experienced this pain years ago

Me too

Offft what did you clip? Hit the end of mine...I nearly cried lmao

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Don't try to make cheats mashed potato in a food processor.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Dont iron naked (men more so) i have experienced this pain years ago

Me too

Offft what did you clip? Hit the end of mine...I nearly cried lmao"

Across my stomach

could have been worse

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Don’t screenshot a conversation to send to a friend while on the phone and then send it to the person you had the conversation With

I did that. Sister didn't speak to me for ages. Must do it again soon

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

Don't search the Internet for sexual practices you read about in the forum but don't know what they are. Ever!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Reply to a message because the content of the message pissed you off

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Do not meet anyone no matter how much you need to get your jollys stay home and stay safe

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By *alking HeadMan
over a year ago

Bolton

"I've mostly removed the feathers from the tumble dryer (emptied the big Dyson 3 times)

No idea how the tear got in the pillow - I'll be checking every pillow in future before they go in the washing machine or dryer."

Were there teethmarks near the tear perchance?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Dont put otex drops in eye thinking its eye brightner..it wont work!!

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By *ockosaurusMan
over a year ago

Warwick

Don't try to sneak up on an automatic door, then when you succeed, get your head squeezed as it tries shutting on it

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By *ympho6969Woman
over a year ago

glasgow

Dont drive the wrong way down a one way street, even if you are going "one way"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Don’t eat tide pods

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Do not put fingers into a live plug socket

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By *ympho6969Woman
over a year ago

glasgow

Dont put warning labels on things that dont need in.

Warning may contain nuts does not belong on a bag ok KP roasted peanuts.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Don't push when the door says pull.

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By *ambozaMan
over a year ago

kilburn park

Be in Denver when your dead

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Never piss on an electrified fence

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By *ecadent_DevonMan
over a year ago

Okehampton

Don’t put three bath bombs in the fountains in Coventry city centre in the morning before they start up

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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago

Dubai & Nottingham

"Send a filthy message before checking who it's going to. "

When you accidentally send your porn to your boss on WhatsApp, don't panic and accidentally delete the entire message thread instead of just the message.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Never forget to wash your hands after chopping chillies and then get amorous with a good lady ... peeling her off the ceiling and dosing her lady bits in iced water is not the best form of foreplay!

Mr HH

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By *aomilatteCouple
over a year ago

Midlands

Don’t ever start a thread in the Virus forum.

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By *atnip make me purrWoman
over a year ago

Reading

"Send a filthy message before checking who it's going to.

When you accidentally send your porn to your boss on WhatsApp, don't panic and accidentally delete the entire message thread instead of just the message."

I'm paranoid of doing this!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Don’t put three bath bombs in the fountains in Coventry city centre in the morning before they start up

I drove through centre Bristol one early morning and they have fountains there. Someone chucked loads of fairy liquid in it. Got a picture somewhere. One of those amazing sights in life. Bubbles were everywhere. Covered buildings etc. Made me smile anyways.

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By *aomilatteCouple
over a year ago

Midlands

Don’t put towels over the balcony on holiday and have sex on the balcony, aas the wind may blow the towels off

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By *rcadian110Couple
over a year ago

Barnsley

Don't breed with crazy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ask for profile help

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By *r kink8585Man
over a year ago

ireland,

Don’t get caught lol

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By *eyond PurityCouple
over a year ago

Lincolnshire

"Don't wear high boots when it's icey out side

Best option - stilletos grip in ice

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By *ampshirehotwifeWoman
over a year ago

Hampshire

"Don’t put the fucking milk in first."

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By *ools and the brainCouple
over a year ago

couple, us we him her.

"Don’t put the fucking milk in first.

Tastes better milk in first.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Send a filthy message before checking who it's going to.

When you accidentally send your porn to your boss on WhatsApp, don't panic and accidentally delete the entire message thread instead of just the message."

That's a big oopsie moment

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Send a text without checking autocorrect first. I do not want to send cock instead of clock to my Christian Mum.

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By *orthern StarsCouple
over a year ago

Durham

Slip when climbing a fence, ouch, it has the potential to ruin ones sex life.

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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago

Dubai & Nottingham

Think LOL means lots of love and write a text to your kids, grandma passed away last night, funerals next Thursday, LOL.

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By *inkylipsWoman
over a year ago

Debauchery

"Never forget to wash your hands after chopping chillies and then get amorous with a good lady ... peeling her off the ceiling and dosing her lady bits in iced water is not the best form of foreplay!

Mr HH

I’ve actually used chillis with an old partner

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Don't send your wife to a hotel meet, request the blokes send back pictures and videos on your phone only for them to dial the wrong number...

Yes dear reader... We had some explaining to do to the police

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Don't run with scissors..."

And don't scissor with the runs

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By *otPrinceHarryMan
over a year ago

Glasgow

Don't use floor cleaner in place of washing-up liquid.

Yes I had a flatmate once do that.

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By *ratty_DamselWoman
over a year ago

New Cross

"Don't send your wife to a hotel meet, request the blokes send back pictures and videos on your phone only for them to dial the wrong number...

Yes dear reader... We had some explaining to do to the police

Omfg. That's hilarious. How long did it take to sort out?

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By *apiomanMan
over a year ago

Shipley

"Don’t put towels over the balcony on holiday and have sex on the balcony, aas the wind may blow the towels off

That sounds like a *do* to my exhibitionist side!

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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL

"Don't, under any circumstances, put washing up liquid in a dishwasher.

Been there did it once. What a mess

I know, I thought a small squirt would be OK, couldn't have been more wrong lol.

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By *pice-meWoman
over a year ago

Home

Don't put your finger where you wouldn't put your dick.

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