FabSwingers.com forum: Profile tips

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Hey guys,

Been on fab a few months now and not getting the best of look.

Looking for some tips on my profile and perhaps an idea around first messages to send

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By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek

First messages need to come from you.

You could send the perfect message to someone but don't forget what's happening in their life at that point could determine how they perceive it.

I've had messages that on one day I'd have welcomed with open arms, the next day I could have taken offence to it depending on how my work day had been.

You don't need the disclaimer, it's bullshit.

All I suggest is be you. Advice from others is all well and good but runs the risk of you behaving how you think others will best receive you, instead of being yourself and preventing those who receive the real you well from doing so.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You've been here 3 months.

What were your expectations on joining the site?

That all you had to do was knock up a quick profile and you'd be fighting women off with a stick within half an hour, as most men who join the site seem to think?

The pointless 'legal' disclaimer is longer than your actual profile text.

Fab is a swingers site, not instashag.

Most single guys wait up to a year before getting their first meet. Some fair better, some worse.

Consider that most of those you message will check out your profile before even thinking about opening your message, but as most women and many couples view in

mode, you won't know anything about it.

There are, roughly, around 100 blokes to every woman on fab, and most women are inundated with messages. If they're not interested, they'll usually just delete your message and many have found that if they send a polite 'no, thank you' they then get a variety of responses from the 'why not' type of message to abuse - most of this is covered in site FAQ's

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Thank you I appreciate the feed back I’ll edit the profile and get rid of the disclaimer

I’ll take on the advice

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By *ull English with teaMan
over a year ago

London

Ditto thoughts on the disclaimer - especially when it’s longer than what you’ve actually written about yourself….

I’d also say you headline of “Looking for rough fun” may put off a lot of people.

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By *RANDMRSJAECouple
over a year ago

chester

I agree with the others regarding your bio but I think your photos are good!

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By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek

"Ditto thoughts on the disclaimer - especially when it’s longer than what you’ve actually written about yourself….

I’d also say you headline of “Looking for rough fun” may put off a lot of people. "

But if that's what he's looking for then best to leave it and give people a heads up.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Biggest tip you do you nobody really reads em anyway

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Thank you for the feedback

My expectations are not high, I did believe it would be easier to have simple conversations with women and couples.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think your photos are good!

Your profile header would put me off.

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By *inger_SnapWoman
over a year ago

Hampshire/Dorset

More in your bio, take the disclaimer off, it's pointless.

Good pics though.

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By *allySlinkyWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

I’d also say you headline of “Looking for rough fun” may put off a lot of people. "

It actually says "looking for rough run".

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 24/11/22 13:50:48]

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By *RANDMRSJAECouple
over a year ago

chester

"I think your photos are good!

Your profile header would put me off. "

Well spotted

Rough run

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By *allySlinkyWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

Good pics though."

All but one are holding his phone. I prefer more variety

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 24/11/22 13:51:37]

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Thank you

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Thank you any bio tips

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By *ull English with teaMan
over a year ago

London

"Ditto thoughts on the disclaimer - especially when it’s longer than what you’ve actually written about yourself….

I’d also say you headline of “Looking for rough fun” may put off a lot of people.

But if that's what he's looking for then best to leave it and give people a heads up."

Fair point, well made!

PS you seem like a nice guy OP so good luck, it’s not easy for single men on here.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Thank you,

So photos are good just need to reconstruct the bio

Is there anything particularly good to include in a bio?"

Take a look at other male profiles and see what they are putting. Don’t copy them but take ideas from it and put your own spin on it.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"First messages need to come from you.

You could send the perfect message to someone but don't forget what's happening in their life at that point could determine how they perceive it.

I've had messages that on one day I'd have welcomed with open arms, the next day I could have taken offence to it depending on how my work day had been.

You don't need the disclaimer, it's bullshit.

Thank you I appreciate the feed back I’ll edit the profile and get rid of the disclaimer

I’ll take on the advice

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"You've been here 3 months.

What were your expectations on joining the site?

That all you had to do was knock up a quick profile and you'd be fighting women off with a stick within half an hour, as most men who join the site seem to think?

The pointless 'legal' disclaimer is longer than your actual profile text.

Fab is a swingers site, not instashag.

Most single guys wait up to a year before getting their first meet. Some fair better, some worse.

Consider that most of those you message will check out your profile before even thinking about opening your message, but as most women and many couples view in

mode, you won't know anything about it.

Thank you for the feedback

My expectations are not high, I did believe it would be easier to have simple conversations with women and couples.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Ditto thoughts on the disclaimer - especially when it’s longer than what you’ve actually written about yourself….

I’d also say you headline of “Looking for rough fun” may put off a lot of people. "

Edited the suggestion thank you for the feedback

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I agree with the others regarding your bio but I think your photos are good! "

Thank you,

So photos are good just need to reconstruct the bio

Is there anything particularly good to include in a bio?

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By *rtyIanMan
over a year ago

Gateway to the Beacons

Variety in pics

Get some different pics done

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I think your photos are good!

Your profile header would put me off. "

Thank you for the feedback

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"More in your bio, take the disclaimer off, it's pointless.

Good pics though."

Thanks for the feedback

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Ditto thoughts on the disclaimer - especially when it’s longer than what you’ve actually written about yourself….

I’d also say you headline of “Looking for rough fun” may put off a lot of people.

But if that's what he's looking for then best to leave it and give people a heads up.

Fair point, well made!

PS you seem like a nice guy OP so good luck, it’s not easy for single men on here.

Cheers mate

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Thank you,

So photos are good just need to reconstruct the bio

Is there anything particularly good to include in a bio?

Take a look at other male profiles and see what they are putting. Don’t copy them but take ideas from it and put your own spin on it. "

Thank you will do

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By *RANDMRSJAECouple
over a year ago

chester

"I agree with the others regarding your bio but I think your photos are good!

Thank you,

So photos are good just need to reconstruct the bio

Is there anything particularly good to include in a bio?"

Perhaps add a little more about what you’re looking for. It’s not easy and the longer you’re on Fab you’ll be able to add more I guess.

Just lose the disclaimer really

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By *partharmonyCouple
over a year ago

Ruislip

I can't speak for everybody, but it does seem that most women here want to feel a connection with somebody in order to want to have sex with them. I would take that to mean you need to show you can have a respectful conversation with somebody you contact that is not just about you getting your dick wet.

Short messages like "Hi" or "How are you" don't show that. Most people put them straight in the bin. Show you can have a conversation. Show that you are interested in the person and what they have to say. Never send a message without reading their profile. That's a good start for finding things to talk about.

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By *ustusboth2013Couple
over a year ago

Birmingham

[Removed by poster at 24/11/22 14:30:03]

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By *ustusboth2013Couple
over a year ago

Birmingham

[Removed by poster at 24/11/22 14:32:26]

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By *ustusboth2013Couple
over a year ago

Birmingham

"Hey guys,

Been on fab a few months now and not getting the best of look.

Looking for some tips on my profile and perhaps an idea around first messages to send "

As a male who initially had a successful single male profile on here, before my relationship and couples profile, I can honestly say, you’ll get out what you put in. And at this moment, what you’re putting in, is not that much.

You don’t have to write war and peace, but break your profile down into short paragraphs.

Something about you so people can see what you’re about (I see you hiking with a backpack. Good pic

) so talk a bit about you.

Then what you like from a swinging/kink point of view. I believe you wrote something about rough play, which will put a number of people off. But equally it will appeal to others. Some rather than headline it. Talk about it in your profile.

If other profiles can see that you’re, for example, professional, educated, respectful. Then also read you can mix it up and can be dominating and rough, throw you around the bedroom.

Then people looking for this, will find comfort in the person you are, yet what you can do when in filth mode.

Of course, it’s all words and down to the actual person, so be honest about yourself. And also accept that not everyone will be interested in this.

Then finally, maybe explain what you’re looking for. And if you’re looking for couples and scenarios, then ensure you know your terminology. Cuckold and Hot Wife are different.

My single profile was quite long. But I did get a few ladies write to say they enjoyed reading. Again, granted not everyone is going to invest that time, but a bit of shape to your profile will make it more appealing. Remember you are part of a large sector in the swinging market so it needs to be a bit different (and even then there’s no guarantees), as people that are looking for single males is only a small proportion compared to other searches.

With your headline/title, try and make it sound punchy and catchy. Maybe something humorous that catches the eye and leads them to read your profile.

Pictures. To be honest, they’re a bit meh! All one dimension. A picture speaks a thousand words. The pic hiking is good. The gym one. And smart dress. All tell a story, but no need to put it on repeat. Look for some others that capture something about you. Perhaps out partying (blur out others of course) that show you are sociable and like to party for example.

Whilst I never did. You may want to consider going to some clubs. Getting a few verifications from here will add credibility.

When you get some momentum, then I’m sure your profile will be successful. Couples looking for men, females looking for men will look at your verifications and if from credible profiles, then it’ll make them that little bit stronger.

Finally, first messages. Make sure you read profiles carefully, and check verifications to see if they are looking for single males. No point messaging for the sake of it. That’s practically fishing and playing the numbers game. Too much effort and little reward.

You can boost this by looking at the meets section. If a couple/female have posted a meet, specifically looking for a single male, then write to them. Read what they want and then align your response to them.

And if you are declined or they haven’t responded, don’t send abuse. There’s always a reason they don’t respond. And if they’re looking again in the future, your next response to them may get a reply. Being abusive, would definitely ensure you don’t get anywhere.

Hope this helps and remember:

Graft smart, not hard!

Good luck!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Anyone got any tips for a younger man on here to create an interesting profile? Been on here a while and never know what to put about myself

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