FabSwingers.com forum: Is it us or has the club scene changed

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

We have been going to clubs for about 8 years and we have found that most playing goes on behind locked doors or the doors that are open have people in it that you wouldn't want to play with. I'm sure 8 years ago it was very different. Who else has noticed this?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Nope we think it goes in fits and starts but not sure what you mean about open rooms having people you wouldn't play with x

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Nope we think it goes in fits and starts but not sure what you mean about open rooms having people you wouldn't play with x"

I.e. people that looked like they are regulars on the Jeremy Kyle show

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

I started going to clubs about 15 years ago and don't think its changed much at all. Maybe more singles than before but that's good for me.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Perhaps the people YOU want to play with don't want to play with you.thus the locked doors.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Perhaps the people YOU want to play with don't want to play with

you.thus the locked doors."
that could be very true

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *olgateMan
over a year ago

on the road to nowhere in particular

Pretty nasty comments to make in my opinion, not everyone is body beautiful and not everyone has the same tastes and attractions. Comments about Jeremy Kyle reek of snobbery

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We're always full of a cross-section of people. Still are...maybe your tastes have changed?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Maybe the Killing Kittens parties are more your thing, rather than clubs. Probably more the swinging partners you're looking for.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

time to find that exclusive club then,

filled with perfect clones of yourself...

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"time to find that exclusive club then,

filled with perfect clones of yourself...

We are far from perfect and defo not looking for perfection just people that look alright like ourselves

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Pretty nasty comments to make in my opinion, not everyone is body beautiful and not everyone has the same tastes and attractions. Comments about Jeremy Kyle reek of snobbery "

Defo not snobs just think that the people in clubs these days are different from what they used to be

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Nope we think it goes in fits and starts but not sure what you mean about open rooms having people you wouldn't play with x

I.e. people that looked like they are regulars on the Jeremy Kyle show "

Nice

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Pretty nasty comments to make in my opinion, not everyone is body beautiful and not everyone has the same tastes and attractions. Comments about Jeremy Kyle reek of snobbery

Defo not snobs just think that the people in clubs these days are different from what they used to be"
I've noticed there are more young people now... When I first started I was always the youngest at clubs... Now there seems a broader variety of people..

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Go to clubs that don't let Jeremy Kyle types in. You'll pay more for the privilege but that is the same in all walks of life.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

"Pretty nasty comments to make in my opinion, not everyone is body beautiful and not everyone has the same tastes and attractions. Comments about Jeremy Kyle reek of snobbery "

To be fair, I suspect we've all thought mean things about some of the people who go to clubs. We just don't post it on here!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Pretty nasty comments to make in my opinion, not everyone is body beautiful and not everyone has the same tastes and attractions. Comments about Jeremy Kyle reek of snobbery

To be fair, I suspect we've all thought mean things about some of the people who go to clubs. We just don't post it on here!

"
. Im not trying to be rude I'm just trying to get over peoples opinions

over this

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have been going clubs for over ten years. I think it's the same now as it was when i first went.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Pretty nasty comments to make in my opinion, not everyone is body beautiful and not everyone has the same tastes and attractions. Comments about Jeremy Kyle reek of snobbery

To be fair, I suspect we've all thought mean things about some of the people who go to clubs. We just don't post it on here!

. Im not trying to be rude I'm just trying to get over peoples opinions

over this "

To some people being rude appears to come naturally

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Pretty nasty comments to make in my opinion, not everyone is body beautiful and not everyone has the same tastes and attractions. Comments about Jeremy Kyle reek of snobbery

To be fair, I suspect we've all thought mean things about some of the people who go to clubs. We just don't post it on here!

I think Teds choice of words were cruel ...everyone has their own 'taste' everyone is attractive to someone and not to others!. Bad boy Ted!. Maybe you should go to a swingers masquerade ball lol. Darcy

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Pretty nasty comments to make in my opinion, not everyone is body beautiful and not everyone has the same tastes and attractions. Comments about Jeremy Kyle reek of snobbery

To be fair, I suspect we've all thought mean things about some of the people who go to clubs. We just don't post it on here!

it commonly happens when u let the male half on the comp for too long lol

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Pretty nasty comments to make in my opinion, not everyone is body beautiful and not everyone has the same tastes and attractions. Comments about Jeremy Kyle reek of snobbery

To be fair, I suspect we've all thought mean things about some of the people who go to clubs. We just don't post it on here!

it commonly happens when u let the male half on the comp for too long lol

By the tone and content of some messages we get the male half of the couple shouldn't be on fab.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ownhouseTwosomeCouple
over a year ago

Birkenhead/Liverpool

I don't think it's changed at all. It does depend on the club though as some clubs attract different clientele to others, so maybe just try different clubs.

There's a club for everyone and every taste out there, you just need to find it.

I'm not saying you are like this one little bit, but from a club perspective, we do see people who are more aesthetically pleasing in the club a lot and the ones who don't seem to get a play are those who have an air of being untouchable...better in some way. So even other 'pretty people' won't approach them as they can give of an uber presence which is quite ugly. My advice to these people is step down a peg or two and open your eyes to the opportunities that are around you. Beauty is more than skin deep. We have played with people who on first meeting, wouldn't normally be our 'type' but on getting to know them, they have been amazing people who we clicked with.

So opening yourself up to opportunities other than pretty people and speaking to others may result in an amazing play that you would otherwise miss.

This is said with respect and in no way derogatory.

Good luck x

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ownhouseTwosomeCouple
over a year ago

Birkenhead/Liverpool

*off*

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *awandOrderCouple
over a year ago

SW London

I haven't been going to clubs that long, within the last year only, with Mr. Mr, however have been on the scene over twenty years on and off and says it has changed in his opinion. much more mainstream now, whereas it used to be hidden, and has been taken over by the beautiful people. We had to have a laugh about this as we have realised that we aren't what we once were ... just taken a bit of time to realise this. He used to be a make model so things change ...hat seems to have changed is its more accepted and less seedy. we love the seediness of it though, and after our favourite club in London changed venues and became decidedly less seedy and more mainstream, we are searching for the old days ... btw, we rent Jeremy Kyle material though, just sayin

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *awandOrderCouple
over a year ago

SW London

"I haven't been going to clubs that long, within the last year only, with Mr. Mr, however have been on the scene over twenty years on and off and says it has changed in his opinion. much more mainstream now, whereas it used to be hidden, and has been taken over by the beautiful people. We had to have a laugh about this as we have realised that we aren't what we once were ... just taken a bit of time to realise this. He used to be a make model so things change ...hat seems to have changed is its more accepted and less seedy. we love the seediness of it though, and after our favourite club in London changed venues and became decidedly less seedy and more mainstream, we are searching for the old days ... btw, we rent Jeremy Kyle material though, just sayin"

*male model

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Pretty nasty comments to make in my opinion, not everyone is body beautiful and not everyone has the same tastes and attractions. Comments about Jeremy Kyle reek of snobbery

To be fair, I suspect we've all thought mean things about some of the people who go to clubs. We just don't post it on here!

Haha Ted is actually one of the nicest blokes you could meet...bad with words but nice lol.

it commonly happens when u let the male half on the comp for too long lol

By the tone and content of some messages we get the male half of the couple shouldn't be on fab.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *orthwest_cplCouple
over a year ago

Stretford

We've been going to clubs pretty much weekly for over 16 years and think the club scene has changed considerably.

When we first started there was a lot of play at most clubs, especially in open rooms. Now clubs seem to be based mostly on socialising with "any play is a bonus". This change seems to us to have been driven by the rise of internet swinging.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *eavenNhellCouple
over a year ago

carrbrook stalybridge

"We have been going to clubs for about 8 years and we have found that most playing goes on behind locked doors or the doors that are open have people in it that you wouldn't want to play with. I'm sure 8 years ago it was very different. Who else has noticed this?"
aww whats wrong op "the beautiful people " no longer interested in you try killing kittens or have they rejected you aswell

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We've been going to clubs pretty much weekly for over 16 years and think the club scene has changed considerably.

So who used to have to guarantee play and to whom?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *orthwest_cplCouple
over a year ago

Stretford

"So who used to have to guarantee play and to whom?"

No one guaranteed play. It's just that pretty much every one did play - unlike many clubs today (in our experience).

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"We've been going to clubs pretty much weekly for over 16 years and think the club scene has changed considerably.

Exactly

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"We have been going to clubs for about 8 years and we have found that most playing goes on behind locked doors or the doors that are open have people in it that you wouldn't want to play with. I'm sure 8 years ago it was very different. Who else has noticed this?aww whats wrong op "the beautiful people " no longer interested in you try killing kittens or have they rejected you aswell "

Lol

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Pretty nasty comments to make in my opinion, not everyone is body beautiful and not everyone has the same tastes and attractions. Comments about Jeremy Kyle reek of snobbery

To be fair, I suspect we've all thought mean things about some of the people who go to clubs. We just don't post it on here!

it commonly happens when u let the male half on the comp for too long lol

By the tone and content of some messages we get the male half of the couple shouldn't be on fab.

my made up gf agrees!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ownhouseTwosomeCouple
over a year ago

Birkenhead/Liverpool

"So who used to have to guarantee play and to whom?

No one guaranteed play. It's just that pretty much every one did play - unlike many clubs today (in our experience)."

I have a theory on this.

With the rise in private parties and more clubs now than 10 years ago, clubs now have had to up their ante to attract more people in the door, enticing them away from private parties. Clubs have started offering more in the way of entertainment (DJ's , singers, dancers etc..) buffets, games and the likes. This has made a club night more of an experience and not just a night of sex. As new people have come on the scene, they don't know any different and expect this all the time, the experienced swingers get used to getting more for their money.

So what has resulted is a club night that can start very social and play can start later on.

But to answer the OP, I don't think it's changed much in the type of people who attend clubs...there have always been a broad range of ages and body types etc.. at clubs, although some clubs can attract a more younger or older crowd.

When we first started out 11 years ago, the average age of swingers was around 30-55 and I don't think that has changed too much. Yes there are younger people on the scene but if you look around any club, you will find that most people fall into the above age bracket.

Some clubs offer nights for young crowds, so for those who want a niche age group, they should seek these out maybe?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *eordiesCouple
over a year ago

newcastle

"We've been going to clubs pretty much weekly for over 16 years and think the club scene has changed considerably.

Totally agree with the above.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Pretty nasty comments to make in my opinion, not everyone is body beautiful and not everyone has the same tastes and attractions. Comments about Jeremy Kyle reek of snobbery

To be fair, I suspect we've all thought mean things about some of the people who go to clubs. We just don't post it on here!

it commonly happens when u let the male half on the comp for too long lol

By the tone and content of some messages we get the male half of the couple shouldn't be on fab.

my made up gf agrees!"

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When there were fewer clubs, the attendance at each would have been denser so you were more likely to see people at it.

Regarding private rooms, I think clubs have started providing more of these in response to what people want. I'm sure there's a lot more people willing to try a club knowing they don't have to shag in public. Being receptive to people's needs and adapting is a good business plan.

I also think that the rise of internet hook ups and swinging will have changed the scene. If you just want NSA sex, well you can get it anywhere. If you want a connection and a bit of a night out experience, with dancing and entertainment etc, then clubs have adapted to provide this because tinder certainly can't.

You can't fault businesses for changing with the changing clientele needs. Ask yourselves, OP, are you exactly the same as you were 8 years ago and looking for the exact same things? I'd guess that's a no. Change is good

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *aughty Wigan CoupleCouple
over a year ago

Wigan

I honestly cannot see what is wrong with this couple stating that the clubs they go to don't have the people in that they want to play with?

We go to clubs often, and often don't play with anyone apart from each other, and often that is because the people in there just don't do it for us or we don't do it for them. I don't think it is snobbery only being willing to play with people they find sexually attractive.

However, I do love Jezza

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I honestly cannot see what is wrong with this couple stating that the clubs they go to don't have the people in that they want to play with?

However, I do love Jezza

I think the issue was that they seemed to lay unequivocal blame on the clubs and everyone else, not just taking it as par for the course that you won't always find everyone attractive enough to play with. There's more tactful ways to phrase it than they used

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *aughty Wigan CoupleCouple
over a year ago

Wigan

Sorry also meant to add that clubs have changed over the years, not necessarily for the better or worse, just different, with new people, new venues and new ways of playing, and perhaps some people being more choosey over they want to play with.

They don't seem as busy as before, but that could be down to too much choice in some areas of the country.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *aughty Wigan CoupleCouple
over a year ago

Wigan

" There's more tactful ways to phrase it than they used"

Maybe they suffer from the same disease that I have, the dreaded "foot in mouth syndrome" where tact and diplomacy go out the window

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Nope we think it goes in fits and starts but not sure what you mean about open rooms having people you wouldn't play with x

I.e. people that looked like they are regulars on the Jeremy Kyle show "

Regulars on the Jeeza show!

HA HA I loved that comment

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I find more single girls are going x

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ustusboth2013Couple
over a year ago

Birmingham

I think the club scene is definitely changing or has changed but not really the aforementioned reasons.

I think it's more down to how the scene is more become a lifestyle choice for many types of people.

As it's evolved, the changing markets have dictated to business opportunities to cater for the dynamics.

My theory has been backed up by a lot of conversations on our club tours and in particular had a great conversation about this with two fantastic people (C & T) that run Secrets.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ustusboth2013Couple
over a year ago

Birmingham

"I find more single girls are going x"

Have definitely found more and more girls joining the scene.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Plus if you think about it pubs are closing plus night clubs closing the choices of nights out are sparse x

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

every time we been infusions its a mix of both some leave the doors unlocked some don't but we don't mind if they want us to join them they would ask

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

A few years ago there was defo more people playing and now it seems more of a social I think swinging has list it's way in general

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

" There's more tactful ways to phrase it than they used

Maybe they suffer from the same disease that I have, the dreaded "foot in mouth syndrome" where tact and diplomacy go out the window

Lol definitely. Although I'm not sure why so many people are getting so upset about it..it's not like we've named them lol

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Pretty nasty comments to make in my opinion, not everyone is body beautiful and not everyone has the same tastes and attractions. Comments about Jeremy Kyle reek of snobbery

Defo not snobs just think that the people in clubs these days are different from what they used to be"

You're right. These days the clubs have me in them.

V xxx

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I honestly cannot see what is wrong with this couple stating that the clubs they go to don't have the people in that they want to play with?

However, I do love Jezza

I think that's just how you read it..that wasn't what we were getting at.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"A few years ago there was defo more people playing and now it seems more of a social I think swinging has list it's way in general"

Lost its way how?

Just curious as to what you mean by this. Are you saying that you want things to go all the way back to grainy polaroids in contact magazines or just that the current set up doesn't suit you guys? The latter would imply to me that you're not right for swinging as it stands, not that swinging is done incorrectly

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I honestly cannot see what is wrong with this couple stating that the clubs they go to don't have the people in that they want to play with?

However, I do love Jezza

. Absolutely

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *epper123Woman
over a year ago

London

Probably my fault as I go to socialise, often dont get the urge to play ....

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"A few years ago there was defo more people playing and now it seems more of a social I think swinging has list it's way in general

Lost its way how?

Lol Ted has been on the scene for over 10 years so he has obviously seen a change within those times. I think it's a little more reserved to how it used to be..that's what he finds annoying......and Polaroid pictures were the best

. Darcy

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *umpkinMan
over a year ago

near the sounds of the wimborne quarter jack!

For the time I`ve been going to Chams Darlaston, I reckon the vast majority of play has always been behind locked doors. The exceptions are the Round Room and possibly the jaccuzzis. Yes, there has been play in public areas too and I think in those cases people have been left alone to get on with what they want to do. Otherwise, I think when people have done the work to strike up a situation with someone else then they don`t want someone else bursting in who may not be on their wavelength or perhaps a single guy pushing their luck and trying to get in on the act! Having said that, I do miss the orgy room at Chams which is where the dungeon room with the revolving thing is now!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *exygalguyCouple
over a year ago

High Wycombe

I thought the lady in this couple was relatively new to Swinging. Not 8 years in. I am sure things change but saying people look like they are from the Jeremy Kyle show is mean and frankly exactly what swinging isn't. If you are so gorgeous perhaps you should just play in front of a mirror and leave the parties out. One of the good things about swinging is that there is no judging. I think you just broke a big rule - being rude doesn't make you popular or attractive it makes you snobbish closed and frankly I hope lots if people that went last night read your comments.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I.e. people that looked like they are regulars on the Jeremy Kyle show "

Or the locked door players have seen you and your high and mighty attitude and thus locked the doors.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I thought the lady in this couple was relatively new to Swinging. Not 8 years in. I am sure things change but saying people look like they are from the Jeremy Kyle show is mean and frankly exactly what swinging isn't. If you are so gorgeous perhaps you should just play in front of a mirror and leave the parties out. One of the good things about swinging is that there is no judging. I think you just broke a big rule - being rude doesn't make you popular or attractive it makes you snobbish closed and frankly I hope lots if people that went last night read your comments. "
just because it's swinging does that mean we are expected to play with people we are not attracted to?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

This is the 'lady' of the couple!....who mentioned about anyone from last night? Ted was speaking in general, so maybe roll your neck in and read things as an opinion not as an insult to anyone in particular! If having an opinion makes us snobbish then so be it!.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *he Hobbit And MeCouple
over a year ago

southampton

"Pretty nasty comments to make in my opinion, not everyone is body beautiful and not everyone has the same tastes and attractions. Comments about Jeremy Kyle reek of snobbery "

Here Here, we are not super models and maybe our bodies our not as good as every one else`s but we love them..

Slight snobbery going on is true!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Pretty nasty comments to make in my opinion, not everyone is body beautiful and not everyone has the same tastes and attractions. Comments about Jeremy Kyle reek of snobbery

Here Here, we are not super models and maybe our bodies our not as good as every one else`s but we love them..

Slight snobbery going on is true! "

Who mentioned anything about anyone's bodies?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I.e. people that looked like they are regulars on the Jeremy Kyle show

Or the locked door players have seen you and your high and mighty attitude and thus locked the doors. "

Lol maybe

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *he Hobbit And MeCouple
over a year ago

southampton

"I.e. people that looked like they are regulars on the Jeremy Kyle show

Or the locked door players have seen you and your high and mighty attitude and thus locked the doors.

Lol maybe "

Look at our pics and you will see what i mean... Jeremy Kyle here we come

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We were at the reviewed party last night, not sure who this couple were even after a little dialogue via messages today. last night we chatted to people and we played, weirdly didn't see anyone that we thought, oh my god they are drop dead gorgeous so out of our league, so maybe this couple didnt stay long eh? cuz its coming across from both the thread and there profile that they are the cream of the crop, what we did see last night lots of sexy, friendly people, and lots of naughty fun, looks alone don't make for a great play anyway, some people have such a high regard for themselves that they are shit at play

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I.e. people that looked like they are regulars on the Jeremy Kyle show

Or the locked door players have seen you and your high and mighty attitude and thus locked the doors.

Lol maybe

Look at our pics and you will see what i mean... Jeremy Kyle here we come

"
I see nothing wrong with your pics

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"We were at the reviewed party last night, not sure who this couple were even after a little dialogue via messages today. last night we chatted to people and we played, weirdly didn't see anyone that we thought, oh my god they are drop dead gorgeous so out of our league, so maybe this couple didnt stay long eh? cuz its coming across from both the thread and there profile that they are the cream of the crop, what we did see last night lots of sexy, friendly people, and lots of naughty fun, looks alone don't make for a great play anyway, some people have such a high regard for themselves that they are shit at play"

In what part of teds review or on this post has he said he is talking about anyone from last night? He was speaking in general and it's his opinion. The review which is nothing to do with this post was also our opinion and not something that I feel would be fair to discuss on this post as that would be unfair to organisers and disrespectful to the people that were there!. I explained on the message you sent why it wasn't for us!. Yes we did leave early and no were not gorgeous at all..were some peoples cup of tea but not others, like everyone

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

From your review

"But possibly not the kind we would play with" maybe we misconstrued that comment!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We all need that spark to play but its not all about looks personality counts too x

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

From your review

"But possibly not the kind we would play with" maybe we misconstrued that comment!"

Quite likely so and yes maybe you have because Ted was meaning in general. We spoke to some really nice people last night and wouldn't be so disrespectful to them nor the club organisers! Like I said, this isn't the place nor would it be fair to discuss that on the forum

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If u don't like the look off people in open room then dont look and go into a private......and maybe your not everyone's type either hun x

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

PM you

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *manda63Woman
over a year ago

Southampton

"time to find that exclusive club then,

filled with perfect clones of yourself...

We are far from perfect and defo not looking for perfection just people that look alright like ourselves "

We aren't in a position to comment on the club scene, having never been but are assuming that you want people that are slim (judging by your comment "people that look alright etc"), means no fatties?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We love going to clubs and have been for a couple of years.

We always lock any room were in due to having a couple of times where it wasn't particularly comfortable with the behaviour of other people.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well I am a fatty and my favourite room at chams is the round room if I go to a club then I go to play x

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"If u don't like the look off people in open room then dont look and go into a private......and maybe your not everyone's type either hun x "

Totally.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We love going to clubs and have been for a couple of years.

We always lock any room were in due to having a couple of times where it wasn't particularly comfortable with the behaviour of other people."

Same

We don't always, it depends on the club and who else is there - but very often there are people who don't take a hint and the only way to lose them is to find a room with a lock.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"time to find that exclusive club then,

filled with perfect clones of yourself...

We are far from perfect and defo not looking for perfection just people that look alright like ourselves

We aren't in a position to comment on the club scene, having never been but are assuming that you want people that are slim (judging by your comment "people that look alright etc"), means no fatties? "

Fatties wouldn't be a word I would use but larger people don't do it for us...but then again what's big to some isn't to others so that's a hard one to answer.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"We love going to clubs and have been for a couple of years.

We always lock any room were in due to having a couple of times where it wasn't particularly comfortable with the behaviour of other people.

Same

We don't always, it depends on the club and who else is there - but very often there are people who don't take a hint and the only way to lose them is to find a room with a lock."

I totally agree with your comments. There should be locks on doors so that people have a choice. darcy

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Well I am a fatty and my favourite room at chams is the round room if I go to a club then I go to play x"

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

From your review

"But possibly not the kind we would play with" maybe we misconstrued that comment!

So you wouldn't discuss people from last night as that would be direspectful?

But speaking generally is fine? So talking about people from 2 weeks ago, a month ago, 6 months ago, that;s not disrespectful?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We always play in open areas as we love to be watched and watch others , if people find us attractive and want to join us then great but if they don't then we just carry on having fun on our own .

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"We always play in open areas as we love to be watched and watch others , if people find us attractive and want to join us then great but if they don't then we just carry on having fun on our own . "

I agree. Darcy

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

From your review

"But possibly not the kind we would play with" maybe we misconstrued that comment!

So you wouldn't discuss people from last night as that would be direspectful?

But speaking generally is fine? So talking about people from 2 weeks ago, a month ago, 6 months ago, that;s not disrespectful?"

Yes totally..but if everyone can put their hands on their hearts and say that they haven't thought the same at some point, be it with a message or in meeting then hats off to you and call Ted a bitch lol. Darcy

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We are probably what you would consider "Jeremy Kyle types" but we are educated, well spoken, decent people, we just don't spend all our time at the gym or counting calories. We only play in locked rooms when we feel there are pushy people around who may spoil our time with the people we are with, and we play in open rooms when we feel the crowd is a nice laid back decent crowd and when we are more open to others joining.

As others have said, if you want to go to a club with only the "beautiful people" then go pay your money and go to an exclusive party such as killing kittens, nothing wrong with having your preferences on looks but I don't like being compared to those on Jeremy Kyle just because I don't fit in with a typically beautiful label.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"We all need that spark to play but its not all about looks personality counts too x"

absolutely!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *manda63Woman
over a year ago

Southampton

"We are probably what you would consider "Jeremy Kyle types" but we are educated, well spoken, decent people, we just don't spend all our time at the gym or counting calories. We only play in locked rooms when we feel there are pushy people around who may spoil our time with the people we are with, and we play in open rooms when we feel the crowd is a nice laid back decent crowd and when we are more open to others joining.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *manda63Woman
over a year ago

Southampton

"time to find that exclusive club then,

filled with perfect clones of yourself...

We are far from perfect and defo not looking for perfection just people that look alright like ourselves

We aren't in a position to comment on the club scene, having never been but are assuming that you want people that are slim (judging by your comment "people that look alright etc"), means no fatties?

Fatties wouldn't be a word I would use but larger people don't do it for us...but then again what's big to some isn't to others so that's a hard one to answer. "

Im large, he is slim. I prefer the slimmer man and he prefers the larger woman. Odd couple I guess then

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Were not beautiful, infact some may think we are off Jeremy Kyle lol..everyone has their preferences and what's good looking to one is not to another lol. Ted was mean saying that.. after all swinging is for everyone to enjoy from all walks of life and what differentiates good looking or 'Jeremy Kyle', large or thin?..each to their own and live and let live is my motto...although Ted is entitled to his opinion of course!.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"
if your well spoken and educated then I'm not sure how that makes you a Jeremy Kyle type.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"time to find that exclusive club then,

filled with perfect clones of yourself...

We are far from perfect and defo not looking for perfection just people that look alright like ourselves

We aren't in a position to comment on the club scene, having never been but are assuming that you want people that are slim (judging by your comment "people that look alright etc"), means no fatties?

Fatties wouldn't be a word I would use but larger people don't do it for us...but then again what's big to some isn't to others so that's a hard one to answer.

Im large, he is slim. I prefer the slimmer man and he prefers the larger woman. Odd couple I guess then

Perfect partnership :D. I prefer flowers every week but Ted prefers not to buy me any lol.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Nope we think it goes in fits and starts but not sure what you mean about open rooms having people you wouldn't play with x

I.e. people that looked like they are regulars on the Jeremy Kyle show "

Doubt it's changed tbh. There's always been a perception that most swingers are mingers, for some reason.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'll add my 2penneth as that's all it's worth probably. I have been going to clubs for 10 years or so on and off and I think the scene has definitely got more 'single friendly' as when I started I would only go with a guy as it felt coupley. These days I am very happy to go as a single female.

My rant starts here:

Some single guys are, in my opinion, using clubs as some sort of cheap brothel. Perhaps it's a reflection on the tough economic austerity we are living in and they can't afford hookers anymore. But some of them have NO IDEA about mutual/reciprocal play and have the idea that clubs are about shooting their load and shooting off home.

Having said that, the couples and single ladies I meet at clubs and the very select single guys that I meet are simply fabulous.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *agmanMan
over a year ago

Cockermouth

"We are probably what you would consider "Jeremy Kyle types" but we are educated, well spoken, decent people, we just don't spend all our time at the gym or counting calories. ..................but I don't like being compared to those on Jeremy Kyle just because I don't fit in with a typically beautiful label.

...........................if your well spoken and educated then I'm not sure how that makes you a Jeremy Kyle type. "

(....lol...........I do like a good debate! But.....(as Darcy appears to be doing

........lets keep it a debate and not a slanging match!

I think I have to direct this query to Ted.......as it was his comment that started this interesting debate..........Grey and Maria suggest they are "Jeremy Kyle" types and Ted thinks he knows what a "Jeremey Kyle" type is.............and others have their opinions..........but can I ask Ted - if I may be so bold, to describe to us what he thinks a "Jeremy Kyle" type actually is..........it would help everyone understand his point of view better.

I have an open mind myself, and would not let first impressions get in the way of a play session...I would want to chat and get to know someone before engaging and then take it from there......whereas my wife has used that very expression - and, with her - what her eyes see.......would prevent her mind form engaging with full stop.......I'm sure we've missed out on many an opportunity for a good time due to this 'tunnel visioned' mindset....and yes........it is a snobbery - I know that first hand!

So.....come on Ted - help us out!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

if your well spoken and educated then I'm not sure how that makes you a Jeremy Kyle type. "

And I not sure how you can judge someone just by looking in an open room and calling them all Jeremy Kyle types.. It must be purely your opinion on their looks, because I'm pretty sure you haven't spoken with them all to find out about their personality, intelligence or class. Unless they are all in there arguing about who gets to sleep with their cousin first or whatever the latest thing on JK is.

Everyone is entitled to judge who they are and aren't attracted to based on looks and personality and whatever and I have no issue with that at all (as per your previous post) but you are making out like people's looks make them the kind of people who would regularly feature on Jeremy's show, which just isn't true, we could be ugly as sin to most and still have too much class and intelligence to be on the UK version of the Jerry Springer show.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We recently had a discussion along these lines. We came to the conclusion that there are a lot more people who are dabblers rather than players. Also there appears to us to be a fashion show mentality at a lot of clubs these days, as in look but don't touch. This is a general view rather than specific.. To be honest the internet has opened a lot of doors, some of which is good and some not so much..

And at the risk of being shouted down, there are a lot of single guys turning up at clubs who don't have a clue about the scene at all....

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *adysilkCouple
over a year ago

birmingham

"We've been going to clubs pretty much weekly for over 16 years and think the club scene has changed considerably.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

...........................if your well spoken and educated then I'm not sure how that makes you a Jeremy Kyle type.

(....lol...........I do like a good debate! But.....(as Darcy appears to be doing

........lets keep it a debate and not a slanging match!

So.....come on Ted - help us out!

Lol I can't see how it's Darcy making it into a slagging match?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I suppose if you had seen Ally and I. We would look l8ke prime tv canidates too. Tattoos, shaved head, goatee beard n down to earth yorkshire accents. You would sniff at us. Yet we live and own a 200 acre farm, own 14 horses and a good income. Yet we dont rub it in peoples faces, dont judge on size and looks, etc. In fact one of the best meets we have ever had was with a single girl who would be classed as JK fodder. Its not about who, where or what. Its about personality and though your hubby is entitled to his opinion. To voice it publicly is insulting and shows what type of people u are. Now I dont think you have done yourselves any favours and the reactions you have received are opinions enough to show how genuine people feel. Do we want to play with stunning people who are snobs or JK Material who u can have a laugh with..answersbitself.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I suppose if you had seen Ally and I. We would look l8ke prime tv canidates too. Tattoos, shaved head, goatee beard n down to earth yorkshire accents. You would sniff at us. Yet we live and own a 200 acre farm, own 14 horses and a good income. Yet we dont rub it in peoples faces, dont judge on size and looks, etc. In fact one of the best meets we have ever had was with a single girl who would be classed as JK fodder. Its not about who, where or what. Its about personality and though your hubby is entitled to his opinion. To voice it publicly is insulting and shows what type of people u are. Now I dont think you have done yourselves any favours and the reactions you have received are opinions enough to show how genuine people feel. Do we want to play with stunning people who are snobs or JK Material who u can have a laugh with..answersbitself."

To be fair it's nothing to do with money or what people have got..it's to do with attraction. And as for not doing ourselves any favours..were not so desperate to be bothered by it

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

if your well spoken and educated then I'm not sure how that makes you a Jeremy Kyle type.

Px"
totally agree. Darcy

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Iwere not so desperate to be bothered by it

. "

That alone shows your personality. Its not about been bothered, its about been so far up your own behinds there isnt room to wipe it.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Iwere not so desperate to be bothered by it

That alone shows your personality. Its not about been bothered, its about been so far up your own behinds there isnt room to wipe it."

...your entitled to your opinion.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

You lot make me laugh because I don't agree with your own opinion which you are free to have you try and shoot us down in flames we are not models with gym fit buddies just normal people givin our opinion we like what we like and you like what you like dies that make either if us wrong, no I don't think so. I wanted constructive criticism not a full on ted and Darcy slanging match to all you closed minded people out there. We are all able to have our own opinions.Ted

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm a big girl and after reading this post I will no longer ever play in an open room now.....so cheers lv you have knocked my confidence now....hope your happy with self

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I'm a big girl and after reading this post I will no longer ever play in an open room now.....so cheers lv you have knocked my confidence now....hope your happy with self

Did we make reference to body type .no we didn't I'm certainly no stick Insect.Ted

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm a big girl and after reading this post I will no longer ever play in an open room now.....so cheers lv you have knocked my confidence now....hope your happy with self

Why would you care about the opinion of these two? Doubt you'll ever bump into them x

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I'm a big girl and after reading this post I will no longer ever play in an open room now.....so cheers lv you have knocked my confidence now....hope your happy with self

If your so upset by one persons opinion then perhaps swinging isn't for you?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Seems to have been so over reaction to the OP comments on here and some backing down from the OP too

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Seems to have been so over reaction to the OP comments on here and some backing down from the OP too

My comments have nothing to do with body types or how much money you have in the bank or weather you go to the gym or not that's totally ridiculous

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *manda63Woman
over a year ago

Southampton

"time to find that exclusive club then,

filled with perfect clones of yourself...

We are far from perfect and defo not looking for perfection just people that look alright like ourselves

We aren't in a position to comment on the club scene, having never been but are assuming that you want people that are slim (judging by your comment "people that look alright etc"), means no fatties?

Fatties wouldn't be a word I would use but larger people don't do it for us...but then again what's big to some isn't to others so that's a hard one to answer.

Im large, he is slim. I prefer the slimmer man and he prefers the larger woman. Odd couple I guess then

Perfect partnership :D. I prefer flowers every week but Ted prefers not to buy me any lol. "

He is perfect and has bought me presents since we met. Rod Stewart cd was the latest gift, which meant a lot as he was obviously listening to me and there aren't many men who do that

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Seems to have been so over reaction to the OP comments on here and some backing down from the OP too

Like you were told when you private messaged us. There is no backing down at all. Ted and Darcy have different opinions and both opinions are being put on comments!.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Biggest over reaction to someone, saying (albeit rather crassly and insultingly) "we had a dull night in a club as we couldn't find anyone to

play with" ever.

But I guess that would have been a boring thread.

Is it wrong I find Jeremy Kyle hot

V x

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *bsinthe_boyMan
over a year ago

Luton

The parties my wife and I cut our swinging teeth at some 13 years ago had a "no closed doors" policy. That was partly for the safety of all concerned.

For sure I can remember playing on the bed, often in a small group of 4-5 people. There would be others around the bed who we might not want to play with, but they were respectful and always sought consent.

I think the change in the scene in more recent years is that there are simply more people on the scene. And that means there are more who don't understand the etiquette. Especially a small proportion of single guys who think they can just barge in. The proportion is possibly no greater than 13 years ago, but with more people in general that means more disrespectful people.

It was some years before I visited a club that even had lockable rooms, but I have always gathered that most do.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *manda63Woman
over a year ago

Southampton

"I'm a big girl and after reading this post I will no longer ever play in an open room now.....so cheers lv you have knocked my confidence now....hope your happy with self

I've just looked at your pics and you look smaller than me and you have met people too. I wouldn't let this post put you off enjoying yourself, just because some prefer slimmer people, there are plenty who prefer the curvier lady. Grey is one of them, he's not keen on slim ladies.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The only real difference is people go more to socialising rather than playing as a single I prefer going on a Friday as there is more variety. Saturdays do nothing for me as I find SOME couples are very cliquey x

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"time to find that exclusive club then,

filled with perfect clones of yourself...

We are far from perfect and defo not looking for perfection just people that look alright like ourselves

We aren't in a position to comment on the club scene, having never been but are assuming that you want people that are slim (judging by your comment "people that look alright etc"), means no fatties?

Fatties wouldn't be a word I would use but larger people don't do it for us...but then again what's big to some isn't to others so that's a hard one to answer.

Im large, he is slim. I prefer the slimmer man and he prefers the larger woman. Odd couple I guess then

Perfect partnership :D. I prefer flowers every week but Ted prefers not to buy me any lol.

He is perfect and has bought me presents since we met. Rod Stewart cd was the latest gift, which meant a lot as he was obviously listening to me and there aren't many men who do that

Good to hear

...are you taking note Ted

lol

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"time to find that exclusive club then,

filled with perfect clones of yourself...

We are far from perfect and defo not looking for perfection just people that look alright like ourselves

We aren't in a position to comment on the club scene, having never been but are assuming that you want people that are slim (judging by your comment "people that look alright etc"), means no fatties?

Fatties wouldn't be a word I would use but larger people don't do it for us...but then again what's big to some isn't to others so that's a hard one to answer.

Im large, he is slim. I prefer the slimmer man and he prefers the larger woman. Odd couple I guess then

Perfect partnership :D. I prefer flowers every week but Ted prefers not to buy me any lol.

He is perfect and has bought me presents since we met. Rod Stewart cd was the latest gift, which meant a lot as he was obviously listening to me and there aren't many men who do that

Good to hear

...are you taking note Ted

lol"
hahaha

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

thats the fun of clubs though isnt it - not knowing who is there - no biggy for us if nobody there we want to play with as we just make our own fun - we will chat to people and have a good time whatever and have spent good lengths of time having a blast with people we wont play with -

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

In our time in swinging life it has changed used to go to clubs getting chatting to others and pleasure times often ensued ,but seems these days go to a club and most there have pre-arranged meets

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *adysilkCouple
over a year ago

birmingham

"In our time in swinging life it has changed used to go to clubs getting chatting to others and pleasure times often ensued ,but seems these days go to a club and most there have pre-arranged meets "
yes we agree , looks like your party went off with a bang though better than a club

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I.e. people that looked like they are regulars on the Jeremy Kyle show "

Think you probably could have just said 'people we don't find attractive'

as someone else has said that statement reeks of snobbery!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ecretescapeCouple
over a year ago

Cheshire

"I don't think it's changed at all. It does depend on the club though as some clubs attract different clientele to others, so maybe just try different clubs.

There's a club for everyone and every taste out there, you just need to find it.

So opening yourself up to opportunities other than pretty people and speaking to others may result in an amazing play that you would otherwise miss.

This is said with respect and in no way derogatory.

Good luck x"

Lovely, lovely message.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Nope we think it goes in fits and starts but not sure what you mean about open rooms having people you wouldn't play with x

I.e. people that looked like they are regulars on the Jeremy Kyle show "

They might look like they are regulars on good old jezza (what ever that means) but least they don't look down there nose at others and they are the ones enjoying themselves while your walking round with your nose in the air. We go off looks initially when browsing or in a club but within 30 seconds of talking to them you can tell if they are the sort of people you want to spend time with. If that is how you look and see others there maybe they see you as a mrs bucket (keeping up apperances) type of person and get a vibe from you that you think your shit doesnt stink. If i talked to someone in a club and got that vibe id be going and playing in a locked room with someone else just like them.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Nope we think it goes in fits and starts but not sure what you mean about open rooms having people you wouldn't play with x

I.e. people that looked like they are regulars on the Jeremy Kyle show

we have played with people at clubs that just going off profile etc here we possibly wouldnt have bothered with -

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Nope we think it goes in fits and starts but not sure what you mean about open rooms having people you wouldn't play with x

I.e. people that looked like they are regulars on the Jeremy Kyle show "

Ah shit. My sexy ironman triathlete partner and myself must remember to apply to Jeremy Kyle...

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

" we have played with people at clubs that just going off profile etc here we possibly wouldnt have bothered with - "

So have we. In a club you have the opportunity to talk to people and find out if there's a chemistry that's not solely based on physical attraction.....that's only if you're open minded enough though!!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

" we have played with people at clubs that just going off profile etc here we possibly wouldnt have bothered with -

yes being open minded helps and mood - i get so extra horny at a club with all the atmosphere and noises about the place

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've never watched Jeremy Kyle but I understood what was meant and I've definitely experienced similar thoughts on a couple of visits to clubs.

If you feel offended by that I think you either need to give some thought to why... or get a grip.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Nope we think it goes in fits and starts but not sure what you mean about open rooms having people you wouldn't play with x

I.e. people that looked like they are regulars on the Jeremy Kyle show

Lol I agree, the way Ted worded his post does come across like that..but it's far from the truth..that's an ugly trait and one that id certainly be disappointed in myself if I came across like that to anyone in my presence..but yes it does come across from this post that we are.

Ted and I, although a couple, have different opinions, which is why my comments contradict some of teds! We are all attractive to some but not to others. I don't have a problem with locked doors, I think the option should be there. A swinging club doesn't guarantee a play..however you look, nor does it give 'anyone or everyone' the right to think they can just join in. Ithink ted just misses how clubs used to be..where as i haven't been going to clubs for as long so I know no different.

I'm not trying to justify teds posts or our comments, its his point of view and he's entitled to it..it's a debate and as adults we should remember that everyone has opinions! I have no idea why people are getting so het up about the Jeremy Kyle comment lol..if I read it I would laugh..not turn into fab police and get so defensive other it lol!.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I've never watched Jeremy Kyle but I understood what was meant and I've definitely experienced similar thoughts on a couple of visits to clubs.

If you feel offended by that I think you either need to give some thought to why... or get a grip."

Hallelujah

at last someone who sees the post for what it is. Darcy.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *et a roomCouple
over a year ago

Leeds

...........................if your well spoken and educated then I'm not sure how that makes you a Jeremy Kyle type.

(....lol...........I do like a good debate! But.....(as Darcy appears to be doing

........lets keep it a debate and not a slanging match!

So.....come on Ted - help us out!

Lol I can't see how it's Darcy making it into a slagging match? "

I read this as Darcy NOT making it into a slagging match and is keeping it a debate.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

...........................if your well spoken and educated then I'm not sure how that makes you a Jeremy Kyle type.

(....lol...........I do like a good debate! But.....(as Darcy appears to be doing

........lets keep it a debate and not a slanging match!

So.....come on Ted - help us out!

Lol I can't see how it's Darcy making it into a slagging match?

I read this as Darcy NOT making it into a slagging match and is keeping it a debate. "

Thank you

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Lol I agree, the way Ted worded his post does come across like that..but it's far from the truth..that's an ugly trait and one that id certainly be disappointed in myself if I came across like that to anyone in my presence..but yes it does come across from this post that we are.

Very eloquently written and I think I can agree with you on most of that Darcy. Paul and I have differing opinions on things too and even sometimes when we agree we have very different approaches to how we'd react/respond.

Maybe some of Teds comments were taken out of context, maybe he could have worded them better.

It's a shame that he is becoming a little disillusioned with the club's, perhaps it's time for a road trip so you guys can try out some new ones together? There's something for everyone out there!

Sasha x

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Maybe some of Teds comments were taken out of context, maybe he could have worded them better.

It's a shame that he is becoming a little disillusioned with the club's, perhaps it's time for a road trip so you guys can try out some new ones together? There's something for everyone out there!

Sasha x"

Absolutely Sasha

, Ted isn't the best at being tactful lol..but we all have our 'downfalls' lol. Life would be boring if we was all the same eh

. Yes I think you are right..road trip in the planning lol..and I think I'll write the message asking about details lol.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Maybe some of Teds comments were taken out of context, maybe he could have worded them better.

It's a shame that he is becoming a little disillusioned with the club's, perhaps it's time for a road trip so you guys can try out some new ones together? There's something for everyone out there!

Sasha x"
I've been toany clubs and I've found that all of them up to this point are mainly pre planned meets or couples just locking themselves in a room very little playing goes on with people that are met on that night. Years ago that was a very different story

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well I hope you both have fun and find what you're looking for from a club night!

Sasha x

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Well I hope you both have fun and find what you're looking for from a club night!

Sasha x"

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

we usually go to clubs when we cant accom or friends/hotlist arent available - only occasionally do we go as an arranged meet usually go on the offchance

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"we usually go to clubs when we cant accom or friends/hotlist arent available - only occasionally do we go as an arranged meet usually go on the offchance "
you guys are a rare breed in my experience

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"we usually go to clubs when we cant accom or friends/hotlist arent available - only occasionally do we go as an arranged meet usually go on the offchance you guys are a rare breed in my experience"

We also never prearranged club meets but we do know people who do, I guess they don't want to accommodate so it's an easy place to meet.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ptimusDMan
over a year ago

Birmingham

Not everyone likes being watched and for all you know, those behind closed doors may not be your type as well. And if you find someone you fancy in an open room, you may not be their type, so you still get nothing.

I've found you can sometimes make your club visits work for you with some forward planning. Identify one or two people that you fancy and will also be visiting at the same time and see if you can meet. If all else fails, you've given yourself a very high chance of playing at least once

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Not everyone likes being watched and for all you know, those behind closed doors may not be your type as well. And if you find someone you fancy in an open room, you may not be their type, so you still get nothing.

"
I totally agree with what your saying. Ted

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I totally agree with what your saying. Ted

Wouldn't that come under 'prearranging a meet at a club'?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"we usually go to clubs when we cant accom or friends/hotlist arent available - only occasionally do we go as an arranged meet usually go on the offchance you guys are a rare breed in my experience"

i hope thats a good thing

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *imited 3EditionCouple
over a year ago

Live in Scotland Play in England

"Nope we think it goes in fits and starts but not sure what you mean about open rooms having people you wouldn't play with x

I.e. people that looked like they are regulars on the Jeremy Kyle show "

Lmao

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I totally agree with what your saying. Ted

Wouldn't that come under 'prearranging a meet at a club'?"

Yes it would and I'm thinking this day and age is what you have to do on the whole to play. Not in all cases as you have made clear

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *agmanMan
over a year ago

Cockermouth

" (....lol...........I do like a good debate! But.....(as Darcy appears to be doing

So.....come on Ted - help us out!

Lol I can't see how it's Darcy making it into a slagging match?

I read this as Darcy NOT making it into a slagging match and is keeping it a debate. "

I was reading through the thread and saw that TedandDarcy had mis-interpreted my response - and was waiting 'til I had read all the comments before correcting TedandDarcy on their mistake.......but I see that 'Getaroom' got there first.........thank you 'Getaroom' - for reading it as I wrote it.

At the end of the day.....it all comes down to choices and preferences.

And many many things will influence us all 'on the night'.........I myself like the spontaneity of a club.............my wife less so - she prefers, and feels more comfortable with planned 'events'.

I'm happy to go with the flow whatever.

I do however agree with almost all comments raised about single guys at clubs. There seems to be a new breed developing.

I have been known to go to clubs on my own - with Baglady's complete awareness i might add - and I would hate to think that I behaved the way I see some men do lately.........or, worse still........be seen by others as being like those pushy / 'expect a play and leave' single guy types. (My wife calls them 'Arnies' after the Predator movies).

For me......those are the type of people that are changing the scene from what it used to be.

And I would hate to think I am being discriminated against (as a single guy at a club) 'cos people look and think negatively, as a result of previous bad experiences - and do not try to engage me as a result.

No offence meant TedandDarcy.......just keeping the debate going

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

" (....lol...........I do like a good debate! But.....(as Darcy appears to be doing

So.....come on Ted - help us out!

Lol I can't see how it's Darcy making it into a slagging match?

I read this as Darcy NOT making it into a slagging match and is keeping it a debate.

At the end of the day.....it all comes down to choices and preferences.

And many many things will influence us all 'on the night'.........I myself like the spontaneity of a club.............my wife less so - she prefers, and feels more comfortable with planned 'events'.

I'm happy to go with the flow whatever.

I do however agree with almost all comments raised about single guys at clubs. There seems to be a new breed developing.

For me......those are the type of people that are changing the scene from what it used to be.

No offence meant TedandDarcy.......just keeping the debate going

No offence taken lol

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I totally agree with what your saying. Ted

Wouldn't that come under 'prearranging a meet at a club'?

Yes it would and I'm thinking this day and age is what you have to do on the whole to play. Not in all cases as you have made clear"

It certainly increases your chances, and means that you already know there's atleast one cpl/single going the same night that you fancy the look of.

It's adapting with the times I guess!

Good luck x

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"we usually go to clubs when we cant accom or friends/hotlist arent available - only occasionally do we go as an arranged meet usually go on the offchance you guys are a rare breed in my experience

i hope thats a good thing

Yes a good thing lol. No Jeremy Kyle seat for you guys

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

Post new Message to Thread