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If I give you a wink it is to test the water


Man in Near, Scotland, UK
Joined: over a year ago
Last on: 6 hours ago

TickPhoto VerifiedOn mobile site
4Public photos
3Friends only photos

Looking For

Couples (MF) Couples (FF) Women TV/TS aged 18 to 67. Will meet smokers.

Meeting

Cannot accommodate. Can travel.

ds

41 years old
Straight

6'0"  183cm
Average
Non smoker
Don't drink
Some tattoos
1 or 2 piercings

Interests

Anal, Blindfolds, Cuckolding, DP, Oral, Safe Sex, Spanking, Taking Photos, Threesomes, Toys, Voyeurism
Truth is, most people who ignore or are rude to you online will happily fuck you in a club atmosphere. They're just picky online because they act as if it is window shopping for humans.

I'm more about the fun!

I'll always turn up for meet clean and And on time...

A newbie couple is getting ready for their first house party. The wife asks, "What should we bring as a gift?" The husband thinks for a moment and says, "Let's bring a nice bottle of wine." An experienced couple heading to the same party overhears them and chuckles. The wife leans over and whispers, "Amateurs. We're bringing towels...

A woman walks into a pharmacy and tentatively approaches the pharmacist. The pharmacist, seeing her hesitancy, asks if there is anything that he can do for her. She asks him in a quiet voice, "Do you carry extra large condoms?" He points to where they are and asks if she wants to purchase a box. She says, "No, but do you mind if I wait here until someone does?"

Knocking Off:- Two guys Dave and Mick, worked on a building site and the foreman had a habit of knocking off at 2pm and telling the workforce to stay till 7pm. This particular day Mick said to Dave “Sod that. As soon as he goes I’m off. Lets knock it on the head”

As soon as the foreman had given them warning to stay til 7pm and disappeared the two friends knocked off. Dave, worried that his wife would hassle him for not putting the hours in decided to stay away from home and pop to the local swingers club. As he entered he noticed a large crowd were gathered round the voyeur window. Curious, he went and looked into the room to see his wife being spit roasted by the foreman and another guy.

The next day the foreman issued his warning about knocking off before 7pm and left. Mick turned to Dave and said, “Are we knocking off again mate?”

“F*ck off” said Dave “I nearly got caught yesterday!”

Horny Mouse:- A mouse walking through the jungle stumbled across an elephant that was lying on the ground crying. The mouse asked what the problem was an the elephant told him she has a thorn embedded in her foot and couldn’t grab it with her trunk and its was so painful. The mouse told the elephant that with his tiny sharp teeth he could probably get the thorn out and the elephant said she would do anything for the mouse if he did. The mouse then gnawed at the thorn and removed it then said to the elephant “You said I could have anything. I wanna shag ya”

The elephant laughed and agreed then leant against a tree with her arse in the air. The mouse positioned him self behind the elephant on a tree stump and began hammering away like a mad man. The mouse asked the elephant to push back and laughing as she did the elephant obliged and stepped on the thorn again and screamed in pain to which the mouse shouted, “Take it all bitch!”