FabSwingers.com: Jeff (58) & Cat (52) , Couple in South Wales M4, Wales, UK

Taken longer than we thought to get this done but here’s our swinging CV. We’ve taken a long break due to several major op’s, so slowly, both metaphorically and literally, getting back into the swing of things, now we’ve moved back to Wales. We’re looking to meet other couples, private meets, Party invites, social groups, Burlesque, fetish and swinging clubs. Perhaps even travel Europerve, Amsterdam or Berlin. Our dream is to buy a Chateaux in France and open a Rocco Hedonistic Venue….(yes, yes, stop dreaming, get on with it…)

ABOUT: Attractive, creative, couple into retro and fetish clothing. Same room fun and laughter. We enjoy photography and 50’s-60’s glamour. Betty Page, Marilyn Monroe, Liz Taylor, Jayne Mansfield, Barbarella. We’ll happily do requests but the Double K’s tend to rule out Twiggy and clothing designed for stick insects. Retro Corsets, waist shapers, girdles, suspenders (Hard Core), retro stockings, seamed Stockings, Wigs, and make-up. Anything that requires hooks, lacing, tightening, Soft restraint, soft ropes, or cuffs. Enjoy playing with toys, cerebral thinking, roll play and gentle spanking, We have even dabbled with electrics but we don't do pain, water sports or extremes. C prefers sub and J dominant, (who knows perhaps we’ll learn to switch in the future). We’ve done the usual Doctors and Nurses and Smutty Office secretary, but if your into adult babies or running around the garden playing horses we tend to get the giggles, so you’re warned we don't take anything very seriously. We love oral, neither of us particularly into anal, and we only do same room fun.

If we are playing at clubs we request respect and manners. C likes to be treated like a lady in public and in her boudoir and like a slut in the bedroom or dungeon. C likes ladies with long sensitive kisses, flirting, caressing and who like to play and tease. We like to play in clubs/parties. Voyeur, watch and be watched. Our safe word is ‘Rare Bit’ we like to know terms of engagement are safe. We are looking for consenting adults to explore and have fun with, not people pushed into this by other people or partners. We’re comfortable watching porn if that's your thing, but we don't like porn featuring young girls, teens, animals or violence. We prefer to play and interact with people, a bottle of Prosecco, a game of truth or dares, or perhaps forfeits (as far as you dare) to break the ice. Tell us your fantasies and we’ll share ours. As you might guess we like our retro music, Dusty Springfield, Judy Garland. 80’s, 90’s, John Peel bands, Goldfrapp, Scissor Sisters, Fat boy Slim. But having Sex to the ‘Ride of the Valkyries’ doesn't do it for us. We’re open to all races, creeds, languages and people of polite society. C also speaks Welsh and we enjoy other people’s differences and culture. especially when we travel.

CHEM SEX: We dabbled back in the 90’s with smiley faces, whistles and rhubarb and custard, so if you want to drop us a ‘line’ with an ‘ecstatic’ private message, I guess we’d still give it a go, why not you only live once. However we don't smoke, don't ‘Vape’ (Or whatever the kids call it now) don't inject, take downers, spice or anything even vaguely dangerous. So we are complete ‘chem’ vanilla’s.

SHOE FETISH: C loves high heels to a level that might put Imelda Marcos to shame. However she now has more metal in her than the bionic woman, so wearing stilettos out and about and to clubs is simply impossible. Obviously in the photography studio we can make it happen and with care and practicing walking across the boudoir, but we have to be practical our high trapeze performances or swinging from rafter days, may be behind us? We don't do sexual stereotypes. C also has a wild rock chick side, Plays a mean frame of pool and likes fast cars. J enjoys cooking and factual history. We both hate housework. Love old movies (always cry during ‘Hotel Paradiso’) Love Grande designs. Good architecture, pulling down walls, painting, boiler suits, mixing cement, and playing with industrial power tools (the bigger and more throbbing the vibration the better).

MEETS: Please send us a face photo we know what your bits look like. We like female to talk by phone directly to C and arrange a half way meet at a pub with craft ale and a decent Pinot. If the Chemistry works we’ll arrange another meet. If it doesn't we prefer honesty and hopefully remain friends, it's a four way decision after all, so more complex than other relationships. We can accommodate but we’re between two properties at present, so you’ll have to put up with some chaos. We do hotel meets but we like a decent swimming pool, as that’s our preferred exercise (We don't do Travel Lodge).

NO: We don't do Single men. Were happy to talk at clubs, socials, enjoy the company of TV, TS and member’s of LGTBQ community in general. No God Squad, Happy-Clappy’s, Jehovah’s witnesses, any sexual hang-ups. Train spotters, Vampires (Unless you look like Angelina Jolie or Johnny Depp) Werewolves, Harry Potter Fans, Russians (Not till you get rid of the day-glow swim wear and learn some manners) Boris Johnson, Teresa Maybot's, Bono (How many times do we have to tell you) No sociopaths, narcissistic, coprophilia, pedophiles, people up their ‘own look’ ass’s, serial killers, and certainly no members of UKIP.

We’re Realists so we don't believe in Brexit, Father Xmas, the land of Unicorns or love at first sight. We do however enjoy sex and a good laugh, so if you’re Naughty boys and girls you may apply. Please head your application as ‘Rare Bit’ so we know you’ve read our profile and are on the same wavelength. If our tastes are not for you, thank you for reading our profile and good luck swinging and finding whatever sakes your booty.

Jeff and Cat x

COPYRIGHT: Our pictures have been placed here for the sole purpose that our friends might ‘masturbate’, any attempt to reproduce, use or alter these images for any other purpose will be met with ‘Fire and Fury’. We’ve spent our lives in the media industry and know more about copyright infringement, mechanical rights and photographic copyright than most people have eaten Jamie Oliver dinners. We have a publisher thank you, as well as access to decent legal advice and if necessary lawyers. So to paraphrase Joan Crawford “Don't Fuck with us fellas, this aint our first time in the rodeo”

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