FabSwingers.com: J (Male) (45) & L (Female) (36) , Couple in Manchester, North West, UK

YOU NEED TO READ THE NEXT FEW LINES!!!!!!

* Unfortunately due to too many people not reading our profile before messaging, please note that if it is obvious that you have not read it, we will delete your message and may block you. We approach every conversation with the presumption that you have read and understood our profile.*

If you can’t be bothered to read it, having seen the length of it, that is absolutely fine. Just please don’t message us because we won’t be interested in you.

If we reply to your message with ‘APP’ or ‘AS PER PROFILE,’ the answer to your question is below!

Friendly, very connected, open-minded, attractive, professional couple relatively new to the swinging lifestyle.

We are L & J, a hot, sexy couple who look forward to meeting, socialising and playing together with exceptionally attractive, respectable and respectful people. As a young, athletic couple, we are looking for all sorts of fun experiences, especially soft swap, full swap, group play, and being watched in hotels, clubs & parties. We are not looking to chat / sext / video call etc. We don’t have Snapchat, Telegram, FaceTube, YouBook or any other such nonsense - we only want face to face meets (initially social) in the way we describe below. We do not sell / gift or donate worn clothing. We have more money than we know what to do with so asking to pay us is farcical.

L - Fully bisexual, I am a very naughty and flirtatious, blonde, published model with a fantastic sense of humour, a great figure and legs that go on for miles. I am creative and artistic, sharp witted and politically intelligent. I enjoy socialising and fun with exceptional men and gorgeous ladies individually or in groups. Once you have met me, you will always want more. J is the sexiest man I know. So hot, so intelligent, so funny (even with his terrible jokes sometimes) and I adore spending time with him. I’m so so lucky to know him and to get to spend time with him. He works incredibly hard and deserves the world. He gives THE best massages bar none. As well as loving being with him. I enjoy watching him and joining in with him with women and couples.

J - Intelligent, athletic, confident and well endowed, I’m a fun, bearded guy who is hairless everywhere else. A 6’1” weight lifting, rugby playing, gym going, financially chilled entrepreneur. I’m hygienic, spotlessly clean, and smell very, very nice. My beard is soft and immaculate. It reaches places the best tongue in England can’t reach alone. I work as a doctor and own several medical businesses in the private sector. Relatively experienced in this lifestyle, I enjoy fun with women and couples. I love watching L enjoy herself with other men and women in the group setting. She simply is the most beautiful, sexy, clever and determined lady I know. She wears gorgeous lingerie and heels and is friendly with all. I love licking her amazing pussy until she squirts into my beard, making her wet and horny for play.

We are in good shape and keep ourselves that way. We are looking forward to interacting with amazingly good looking, sexy, kinky, fun people to see how we get on and if at the same level then let the fun begin. We are a no pressure couple looking for the same.

We own and run a multi-million pound national (UK and Ireland) occupational health company which takes us around the country and we work pretty much every weekend, taking some days off in the week to compensate. We are never looking to meet when we are working. We meet and interact unwaveringly as described below. If you see us up very early on a Saturday or Sunday morning, it generally means we have to travel some distance to start work.

ALL of our initial meets with anyone (M,F,MF,TS) we previously haven’t met, happen in clubs. We mostly attend in an afternoon. Cupids in Swinton is our favourite. If you don’t visit clubs, and / or you aren’t a friend already, we will NEVER meet you in a private setting. The social side of swinging is really important to us too, and clubs work so well for that. We will always put in the succeeding paragraph if we are looking to meet socially and/or sexually, attending a club or arranging a private gathering.

We will next be attending Cupids together on the afternoon of Tuesday 16th June (MOTD.)

Occasionally we will look to set up a daytime meeting in a Manchester hotel. When this is on our status, we are ONLY looking for friends we already know to share sexy antics with, couples and girls and any outstanding ‘top percent’ single males we have previously met in Cupids. Consequently, details of where we are meeting will only be posted within our friends’ photos.

We will next be planning a Manchester Hotel afternoon on Wednesday 10th June.

If you are male, younger than J but have smaller biceps, we 100% don’t need a message from you. Particularly, if you are staying in a motel, Travelodge, Premier Inn, Ibis or similar 3 star establishment, we will not be interested. Talk to us if you are in the Radisson Edwardian, The Midland, Dakota, or equivalent.

We enjoy safe, open flowing fun with no boundaries. Hygiene and cleanliness are essential for us and we are both clean and shaved and expect the same. We are more than happy to play with women, T/S, guys and couples in clubs, if we chat and get on and you fit the criteria we stipulate below we look forward to being in your company.

We are not ageist, racist, genderist, or indeed anythingist so no need to ask if we are ‘into’ you. If you think you meet the criteria we stipulate, we are happy to meet you in Cupids.

We both have access to this account and will only read and reply to messages only when we are together so please be patient if we take a while to get back to a message. J is the person who writes all of our status updates.

Strictly safe sex only and we will only ever play or meet others together. If you like what you read and think we may connect well together, please feel free to drop us a message with face pic and body pic if you don’t have any visible on your profile. We like to know who we are talking to. Please don’t ever send us pictures of your genitalia. It simply isn’t attractive or anything we need to see to entice us towards meeting you. (Nor does a person who constantly talks about size, girth, repetition, cum load or any such thing. You bore us and experience teaches us that you are a lifelong serial wanker.) We are not here to sext so if your message to us is of an explicit nature or asks us what happens in a club or invites us to talk about sexual exploits, we will respond with the word ‘pfiffle’ and will block you later in the day. We also do not need anyone in a servile role and questions pertaining to such will receive the same response.

At risk of automatically being blocked by us, please only ask us to be friends if we definitely know each other and have really become friends. If we are uncertain whether this is the case, we may ask you where we know each other from. Also, ‘winks’ from single males are completely pointless and we have now decided initially to return the wink to everyone for banter. Unless accompanied by a message, experience teaches us that they come from people who don’t have the intelligence or confidence to message us directly. We therefore subsequently block those who do just wink at us, because by definition they have not had the respect to read our profile.

We occasionally drink socially and have never partaken in any drugs. We have no wish to do so, nor meet anyone who does.

So we do know you have read our profile and for your message to receive our full attention, please use the word “Stiletto” at the beginning of your message to us. Otherwise it will be ignored and deleted and rarely considered for a reply.

We are sapiosexual and very, very picky. We only want to meet charismatic, confident, intelligent, built, ripped, in shape people. We are looking for outstanding individuals: the top 1%. Please don’t correspond with us with poor grammar. Our number one criterion is that you have had the respect to read and fully comprehend our profile without us having to prompt you to do so. If you are not prepared to do this, you automatically do not come close to what we are looking for. If you claim to have done so but asked us a question which reveals you haven’t, there is no point messaging again.

We don’t particularly need messages from anyone on here. Simply, if you feel you meet our criteria, say ‘Hi,’ if you see us in a club. To reiterate, we always post within our profile when we are planning on attending a club. We usually attend on weekdays around 2 or 3 times a month.

We do not discern whether or not you are in our top one percent from your profile. Indeed, we rarely click onto peoples’ profiles. If you feel you meet the criteria, we are happy to chat with you and upon meeting determine whether we would wish to proceed to have a more intimate time with you.

To avoid disappointment, we clearly describe what we are looking for and if you don’t fit into that category, we will not play with you. We will certainly not meet you if we feel we have had to direct you to read our profile. We do subsequently read through our message threads and if we have put ‘APP’ at any point, block that person or people.

And if anyone calls us love, sweetheart or babe, we automatically presume you are talking to John.

Thank you for reading this. We know it is long and we appreciate your respectfulness. Lots of love to all of our friends, Laura & John. Xx

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