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Chill, looking for same


Man in Eastleigh, South East, UK
Joined: 4 months ago
Last on: 7 hours ago

Photo Verified
3Friends only photos

Looking For

Couples (MF) Men Women aged 18 to 99. Will meet smokers.

Meeting

Cannot accommodate. Cannot travel.

E

29 years old
Bi-curious

5'11"  180cm
Athletic
Non smoker
Social drinker
Some tattoos
1 or 2 piercings

Interests

Toys, Voyeurism, Threesomes, Taking Photos, Spanking, Soft Swing, SM, Separate Room Swapping, Same Room Swapping, Safe Sex, Role Play, Rimming, Phone Sex, Oral, Making Videos, Group Sex, Gangbangs, DP, Dogging, Cybersex, Cuckolding, Anal, Adult Parties
READ THE PROFILE!!!! VERY IMPORTANT!!! Fun, flirty, sexy guy, basically god's gift to humanity "looking for fun" with couples, guys, and very special select single women. Single women, I'll find you when I need you. Let's face it, you're basically a dime a dozen on here and people are inundated with messages from you so make your message stand out. No hi, how are you, meet now messages or messages containing any form of a greeting whatsoever. Be original. Be unique. Say something to me that no woman on planet Earth has ever written before. But do so without using the letters "I","A", "T", "R", "S", "L", or "E". If you send me an unsolicited face pic, I will block you instantly, if you have pictures of your face on your profile I will block you, if you have pictures of your boobs or pussy or bum on your profile or you send them to me I will block you. Everyone knows what they look like and it doesn't look as good as you think it does, trust me.

Stimulate my mind instead. Send me a syllogism with epistemological footnotes containing proofs for the meaning of life in the form of a Seinfeld skit. It's not hard to do. In fact, it's the bare minimum.

Single women, I will need to meet you for a social where you will have to justify your entire existence to me before anything else happens. If you have a freckle on your lower back that I don't like, please have an explanation for that ready if I choose to meet with you.

I will not be meeting any single women for any form of sex or foreplay. It will simply be to move a sofa for me which I need to get rid of.

In order to have a chance of getting a reply, remember these incredibly helpful and objective rules.

Don't be boring. Don't be unfunny. Be a good person. If I'm going to think you are ugly, DO NOT MESSAGE ME. That way, I can sort out who is worth my time and who isn't. Put the word "solipsism" somewhere in your message so I know you've read my profile. Thanks. Also, if I never message you then don't take it personally,it just means you're ugly. To me. It's not the end of the world, to someone else you might be ugly too. If I messaged every ugly person, it would be a full time job and I'm here to have fun. With about 6 people who are way out of my league, every two or 3 months.

If you haven't read my profile or choose to ignore the incredibly unoriginal cookie-cutter list of demands I've made because you've already seen the same crap 6 million times from people who all think this is new information for some reason or because you find it offensive that anyone would be so incredibly self-absorbed and also simultaneously not self-aware enough to know that they sound like a narcissistic psychopath for publicly posting this, then move along because I'm not the guy for you.

Men and couples, you don't have to do anything.Just message.