FabSwingers.com forum: Doomed ..

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I've been single for a long while .. it's been fun, alot of ! But I've got to the point where fab is starting to feel empty .. Alas, it's also tainted me - in that I question intentions in the 'vanilla' world so much so, that I can't seem to commit ..

Is it the worry of missing out ? Or is it the worry of entering a relationship that's purely sexual and that it won't progress ?

I've tried the whole friends with benefits thing.. it's great , though benefits always seem to trump the friendship .. and there are other things this situation just can't give you..

I've seen it on other threads , single men who wouldn't date on fab but are looking to date elsewhere ? Why so?

I am., for the record - entirely aware that this site is proposed to be no strings .. but is successful dating possible?

I'm sure many other women and men even feel the same .. thoughts would be interesting to hear!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ackwoody11Man
over a year ago

swansea

You shouldn't be single you look amazing x

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I liked your honest and well written message. If you would care to chat privately then please message on my profile. I too am in a similar situation and perhaps we could swop notes as it were.

Thank you

James

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ovis and GreeneyesCouple
over a year ago

Swansea

Yes it is possible, we and many other couples on here are proof of it

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I find that I meet women who I love to have a sexual fling with and have no strings but when I do find a relationship the excitement of sex etc isn't there. I have never been able to find the best of both worlds in 1 woman as of yet and it's extremely frustrating.

I think that if I meet a woman I really like then I'm afraid to open up fully with my kinks and desires in case it puts them off. Then vice versa is I meet a woman I'm not that into where I can't see it being a long term thing I open up and lay all cards on the table and if things do happen Its normally amazing as they know which buttons to press.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Yes it is possible, we and many other couples on here are proof of it

Did it happen unexpectedly? Or did you both know you were looking for more ?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I find that I meet women who I love to have a sexual fling with and have no strings but when I do find a relationship the excitement of sex etc isn't there. I have never been able to find the best of both worlds in 1 woman as of yet and it's extremely frustrating.

Where would you start to look for the best of both ? It's a tricky one ..

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *bergavennymeMan
over a year ago

abergavenny

I am not designed for this site !

I am in a vanilla relationship that does not fulfil me enough so I have been looking for a full on relationship from here , someone who is intelligent beautiful loyal faithful but also imaginative filthy and stretches both our minds ! ....

I live alone and when I find this person happy to change everything for them , but with my work and life my challenge of finding this person like yourself seems impossible !!!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Where would you start to look for the best of both ? It's a tricky one ..

A wise person once told me the best relationships come from building a great friendship first or even being friends for a long time and being completely open with them about sexual desires and kinks etc... Then realising you feel more towards them.

I work with a girl who I feel that exact way about but unfortunately the feeling isn't mutual

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ovis and GreeneyesCouple
over a year ago

Swansea

"Yes it is possible, we and many other couples on here are proof of it

Did it happen unexpectedly? Or did you both know you were looking for more ? "

Completely unexpected

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I've been single for a long while .. it's been fun, alot of ! But I've got to the point where fab is starting to feel empty .. Alas, it's also tainted me - in that I question intentions in the 'vanilla' world so much so, that I can't seem to commit ..

Is it the worry of missing out ? Or is it the worry of entering a relationship that's purely sexual and that it won't progress ?

I've tried the whole friends with benefits thing.. it's great , though benefits always seem to trump the friendship .. and there are other things this situation just can't give you..

I've seen it on other threads , single men who wouldn't date on fab but are looking to date elsewhere ? Why so?

I am., for the record - entirely aware that this site is proposed to be no strings .. but is successful dating possible?

I'm sure many other women and men even feel the same .. thoughts would be interesting to hear! "
how you single

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Yes it is possible, we and many other couples on here are proof of it

Myself and malcolm

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Any relationship made on here is, in my opinion doomed to failure, the desire for exclusivity is not a common trait on a swinging site, I believe that’s vital at the beginning of a relationship.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Any relationship made on here is, in my opinion doomed to failure, the desire for exclusivity is not a common trait on a swinging site, I believe that’s vital at the beginning of a relationship."

Totally disagree

I personally could not have had a ltr with someone off here but I know many couples and have even been to a wedding of a couple who met on here. So it can and does work

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I guess that's where mutual interest comes in to play , I don't think I could have a swinging relationship.. though of two people are completely geared toward it and trust each other enough, I get it could work..

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It can happen. I've had a relationship from meeting someone on here. It wasn't a swinging one though. We left the site together. We've since broken up, but he is still a good friend of mine

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Is it the worry of missing out ? Or is it the worry of entering a relationship that's purely sexual and that it won't progress ?

I've tried the whole friends with benefits thing.. it's great , though benefits always seem to trump the friendship .. and there are other things this situation just can't give you..

I've seen it on other threads , single men who wouldn't date on fab but are looking to date elsewhere ? Why so?

I am., for the record - entirely aware that this site is proposed to be no strings .. but is successful dating possible?

I'm sure many other women and men even feel the same .. thoughts would be interesting to hear!

how you single "

Do you mean because of the way I look ? Well, that's why really .. I'm a little more complex

I question intentions when dating because ultimately fab values you on the surface (for the most part) and though it's flattering .. I have enough about me to know it's not enough for something long term ..

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"It can happen. I've had a relationship from meeting someone on here. It wasn't a swinging one though. We left the site together. We've since broken up, but he is still a good friend of mine

Did fab have any impact on the ending ?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Any relationship made on here is, in my opinion doomed to failure, the desire for exclusivity is not a common trait on a swinging site, I believe that’s vital at the beginning of a relationship.

Totally disagree

I personally could not have had a ltr with someone off here but I know many couples and have even been to a wedding of a couple who met on here. So it can and does work

And how long have these relationships lasted?

I’m talking about life commitment.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It can happen. I've had a relationship from meeting someone on here. It wasn't a swinging one though. We left the site together. We've since broken up, but he is still a good friend of mine

Did fab have any impact on the ending ? "

No lovely. Not at all

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Any relationship made on here is, in my opinion doomed to failure, the desire for exclusivity is not a common trait on a swinging site, I believe that’s vital at the beginning of a relationship.

Totally disagree

I personally could not have had a ltr with someone off here but I know many couples and have even been to a wedding of a couple who met on here. So it can and does work

And how long have these relationships lasted?

I’m talking about life commitment.

Well the couples I know are still together so I can't give you an answer to that until they a) split up or b) die

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Any relationship made on here is, in my opinion doomed to failure, the desire for exclusivity is not a common trait on a swinging site, I believe that’s vital at the beginning of a relationship.

Totally disagree

I personally could not have had a ltr with someone off here but I know many couples and have even been to a wedding of a couple who met on here. So it can and does work

And how long have these relationships lasted?

I’m talking about life commitment.

Well the couples I know are still together so I can't give you an answer to that until they a) split up or b) die"

Yep, always nice to see a valuable contribution to a topic eh

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Any relationship made on here is, in my opinion doomed to failure, the desire for exclusivity is not a common trait on a swinging site, I believe that’s vital at the beginning of a relationship.

Totally disagree

I personally could not have had a ltr with someone off here but I know many couples and have even been to a wedding of a couple who met on here. So it can and does work

And how long have these relationships lasted?

I’m talking about life commitment.

Well the couples I know are still together so I can't give you an answer to that until they a) split up or b) die

Yep, always nice to see a valuable contribution to a topic eh"

Very much so

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *antra MassageMan
over a year ago

South Side.

I think, for me this could be a good place to meet someone special. I can lay all my cards on the table when we first meet, and if we like each other take it from there. And nobody has ever been frightened off. I live in hope.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ar-Some CoupleCouple
over a year ago

from somewhere glittery & sparkly

"Any relationship made on here is, in my opinion doomed to failure, the desire for exclusivity is not a common trait on a swinging site, I believe that’s vital at the beginning of a relationship.

Totally disagree

I personally could not have had a ltr with someone off here but I know many couples and have even been to a wedding of a couple who met on here. So it can and does work

And how long have these relationships lasted?

I’m talking about life commitment.

Well the couples I know are still together so I can't give you an answer to that until they a) split up or b) die"

If she carries on it will be b

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Any relationship made on here is, in my opinion doomed to failure, the desire for exclusivity is not a common trait on a swinging site, I believe that’s vital at the beginning of a relationship.

Totally disagree

I personally could not have had a ltr with someone off here but I know many couples and have even been to a wedding of a couple who met on here. So it can and does work

And how long have these relationships lasted?

I’m talking about life commitment.

Well the couples I know are still together so I can't give you an answer to that until they a) split up or b) die

If she carries on it will be b

I'll get my funeral attire dusted off

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ar-Some CoupleCouple
over a year ago

from somewhere glittery & sparkly

"Any relationship made on here is, in my opinion doomed to failure, the desire for exclusivity is not a common trait on a swinging site, I believe that’s vital at the beginning of a relationship.

Totally disagree

I personally could not have had a ltr with someone off here but I know many couples and have even been to a wedding of a couple who met on here. So it can and does work

And how long have these relationships lasted?

I’m talking about life commitment.

Well the couples I know are still together so I can't give you an answer to that until they a) split up or b) die

If she carries on it will be b

I'll get my funeral attire dusted off

I will book the sweetcart then lol

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ittlevixenWoman
over a year ago

Mold North Wales

[Removed by poster at 10/11/18 18:03:02]

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Any relationship made on here is, in my opinion doomed to failure, the desire for exclusivity is not a common trait on a swinging site, I believe that’s vital at the beginning of a relationship.

Totally disagree

I personally could not have had a ltr with someone off here but I know many couples and have even been to a wedding of a couple who met on here. So it can and does work

And how long have these relationships lasted?

I’m talking about life commitment.

Well the couples I know are still together so I can't give you an answer to that until they a) split up or b) die

If she carries on it will be b

I'll get my funeral attire dusted off

I will book the sweetcart then lol

How rude lol

And op no it can happen when you least expect it too

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ovis and GreeneyesCouple
over a year ago

Swansea

"Any relationship made on here is, in my opinion doomed to failure, the desire for exclusivity is not a common trait on a swinging site, I believe that’s vital at the beginning of a relationship."

So wrong

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ar-Some CoupleCouple
over a year ago

from somewhere glittery & sparkly

"Any relationship made on here is, in my opinion doomed to failure, the desire for exclusivity is not a common trait on a swinging site, I believe that’s vital at the beginning of a relationship.

So wrong

Totally agree with you hovis

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Any relationship made on here is, in my opinion doomed to failure, the desire for exclusivity is not a common trait on a swinging site, I believe that’s vital at the beginning of a relationship.

So wrong

What’s wrong?

The above is an opinion, I’ve checked, yep it’s still my opinion.

I’d gamble a fair sum that Fab has facilitated far more relationship break ups that it is has forged new relationships.

Both men and women are fickle by nature, most in a relationship created on Fab have probably had previous relationships created on Fab.

Kind of a Fab version of the circle of life,

Hakuna matata all

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Any relationship made on here is, in my opinion doomed to failure, the desire for exclusivity is not a common trait on a swinging site, I believe that’s vital at the beginning of a relationship.

So wrong

What’s wrong?

The above is an opinion, I’ve checked, yep it’s still my opinion.

I’d gamble a fair sum that Fab has facilitated far more relationship break ups that it is has forged new relationships.

Both men and women are fickle by nature, most in a relationship created on Fab have probably had previous relationships created on Fab.

Kind of a Fab version of the circle of life,

Hakuna matata all

So full of shit !!!

Well obviously you’re entitled to your opinion, no matter how wrong it is, just because someone has been in a relationship before doesn’t mean your new one won’t work, maybe the first one wasn’t right for you or just maybe your not suited to a relationship

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ar-Some CoupleCouple
over a year ago

from somewhere glittery & sparkly

"Any relationship made on here is, in my opinion doomed to failure, the desire for exclusivity is not a common trait on a swinging site, I believe that’s vital at the beginning of a relationship.

So wrong

What’s wrong?

The above is an opinion, I’ve checked, yep it’s still my opinion.

I’d gamble a fair sum that Fab has facilitated far more relationship break ups that it is has forged new relationships.

Both men and women are fickle by nature, most in a relationship created on Fab have probably had previous relationships created on Fab.

Kind of a Fab version of the circle of life,

Hakuna matata all

Absolutely full of shit...

Just because one fab relationship doesn't work it doesn't mean another wont

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Any relationship made on here is, in my opinion doomed to failure, the desire for exclusivity is not a common trait on a swinging site, I believe that’s vital at the beginning of a relationship.

So wrong

What’s wrong?

The above is an opinion, I’ve checked, yep it’s still my opinion.

I’d gamble a fair sum that Fab has facilitated far more relationship break ups that it is has forged new relationships.

Both men and women are fickle by nature, most in a relationship created on Fab have probably had previous relationships created on Fab.

Kind of a Fab version of the circle of life,

Hakuna matata all

You'll find that's relationships in general, regardless if a couple meet on fab or not.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My former opinion is the exact same as yours OP.. fab meets had tainted my view on vanilla relationships completely.

However, fast forward and I have entered into a 'fab' relationship. Something I never though I could or would do.

It's been a bit of a whirlwind. However, being with someone who I can be completely open and honest with is huge for me.

I feel happier than I have done in a lonnnnngggg time, and am hopeful that this long continues x

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"My former opinion is the exact same as yours OP.. fab meets had tainted my view on vanilla relationships completely.

However, fast forward and I have entered into a 'fab' relationship. Something I never though I could or would do.

It's been a bit of a whirlwind. However, being with someone who I can be completely open and honest with is huge for me.

I feel happier than I have done in a lonnnnngggg time, and am hopeful that this long continues x

Congrats !

When you say fab relationship , do you mean a swinging relationship with all the feels? Or a relationship for fab purposes ?

I'm not sure if I would want to share if I met someone I really cared for .. I think my main concern is the impact fab has had on my perspective- and if I'll ever be able to settle with said perspective !

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"My former opinion is the exact same as yours OP.. fab meets had tainted my view on vanilla relationships completely.

However, fast forward and I have entered into a 'fab' relationship. Something I never though I could or would do.

It's been a bit of a whirlwind. However, being with someone who I can be completely open and honest with is huge for me.

I feel happier than I have done in a lonnnnngggg time, and am hopeful that this long continues x

Congrats !

When you say fab relationship , do you mean a swinging relationship with all the feels? Or a relationship for fab purposes ?

Thank you

I mean a relationship, with real feels, not just for fab purposes.

I was of the same view. That I wouldn't be able to share if I cared for someone. However, playing together at clubs is something I'm comfy with. Certain things are left for just us.. so far so good

Totally agree!! After a few weeks on fab, my perspective on relationships, men was entirely different to pre- fab. It's a bloody tricky one

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Fab and swinging in general is complicated and people want such different things.

I'm married but my wife and I are on here together as well as separate and it took a long time to reach a comfortable place to do that.

But even then we want slightly different things. She's more casual about it whereas I need to feel that real connection.

So I want the friends before the benefits and want someone I can really connect with but it's very hard to find that when you are already in a relationship.

People distrust your intentions and don't understand how you can be with someone but form a bond with someone else which is ironic really considering this is all about sharing.

But not everyone can share emotionally as well as physically.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Is it the worry of missing out ? Or is it the worry of entering a relationship that's purely sexual and that it won't progress ?

I've tried the whole friends with benefits thing.. it's great , though benefits always seem to trump the friendship .. and there are other things this situation just can't give you..

I've seen it on other threads , single men who wouldn't date on fab but are looking to date elsewhere ? Why so?

I am., for the record - entirely aware that this site is proposed to be no strings .. but is successful dating possible?

I'm sure many other women and men even feel the same .. thoughts would be interesting to hear! "

The site has felt empty to us for a long long time, I don't meet here anymore because nothing takes my fancy & Ch3wy won't meet here. We've both moved to the club scene, we're secure in our long term best friends for fun arrangement & find clubs suit our individual & couple needs. I enjoy parties & clubs on my own & have a couple of ongoing 1:1 things continuing, but then I'm not looking for & can't forsee me looking for anything more meaningful than the deep closeness of a best friend. The beauty of this site is it allows for that diversity, its just the closed minds of the few that spoil it at times. All the best in your swinging however that should look & feel to you.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

Post new Message to Thread