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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Something we have noticed is that we are nearly always being messed around by single guys. Not every single guy but the majority of them. They always seem to message you when they want to hook up and seem to have no interest in a friendship. Is it just us or are other people finding the same thing?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 18/05/18 20:59:03]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We've also noticed this with a few single guys. But more recently finding the exact same problem with couples and single females who say they want to meet then go quiet especially when the word 'friendship' is mentioned

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"We've also noticed this with a few single guys. But more recently finding the exact same problem with couples and single females who say they want to meet then go quiet especially when the word 'friendship' is mentioned "

Glad it's not just us then... I don't understand it. How can you have sex with someone that you don't have a connection with?

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By *thwalescplCouple
over a year ago

brecon


"We've also noticed this with a few single guys. But more recently finding the exact same problem with couples and single females who say they want to meet then go quiet especially when the word 'friendship' is mentioned

Glad it's not just us then... I don't understand it. How can you have sex with someone that you don't have a connection with? "

Amen to that.

We didn't really know what to expect when we started swinging, thought it would all be about the sex.... but we rapidly found that we love making like-minded friends.

That's not to say we cant swing with randoms, but given a choice we would prefer to be able to chat and have a giggle with people too.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Something we have noticed is that we are nearly always being messed around by single guys. Not every single guy but the majority of them. They always seem to message you when they want to hook up and seem to have no interest in a friendship. Is it just us or are other people finding the same thing?"

Im finding exactly the same thing. I've been so messed around on here. I know not all are the same but the ones I seem to get are really bad. They don't want to talk and once they have played they move on. Some are just coffee meet time wasters Its put me off and I even thought of leaving here as it's not fun at the moment x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We've been on and off for almost 4 years but keep coming back in the hope of finding a few good friends who want more than just sex but each time realise it's hard to find others that want the same

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By *mooth Operator 07Man
over a year ago

in the deep mist of the valleys

I'm glad you mentioned not all single guys are that bad. Unfortunately there are some bad apples on this site and i know where your coming from. Friendship is essential and hey don't let it stop you seeking the genuine people on this site.

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By *lackceltMan
over a year ago

Cardiff


"I'm glad you mentioned not all single guys are that bad. Unfortunately there are some bad apples on this site and i know where your coming from. Friendship is essential and hey don't let it stop you seeking the genuine people on this site. "

Amen to that brother!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've sworn off single guys forever.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Something we have noticed is that we are nearly always being messed around by single guys. Not every single guy but the majority of them. They always seem to message you when they want to hook up and seem to have no interest in a friendship. Is it just us or are other people finding the same thing?"

Some single guys have a friendship interest but get messed around by women and couples so many times we don't get the chance to prove it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Something we have noticed is that we are nearly always being messed around by single guys. Not every single guy but the majority of them. They always seem to message you when they want to hook up and seem to have no interest in a friendship. Is it just us or are other people finding the same thing?"
its all about the freindship and connection or no point

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By *ion6-9Man
over a year ago

Cardiff

I much prefer to develop a relationship, whether before a first meet or after.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

most "single guys" are not ! they are married .

They cannot get away from their wife for a night.

we have found that its mostly ok around 4pm or times when they can get away as

there is no going to see" a man about a dog " anymore .

we found a lot who have not met much sometimes bottle it when the chance finally happens but 80% do not message just silence and hours later THE excuse! my goldfishes auntie died.

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By *mooth Operator 07Man
over a year ago

in the deep mist of the valleys

I don't understand people dishonesty on this site and it does ruin it for everyone.

I have had couples wanting to meet instantly late at night on weekend. Unfortunately I have had to decline, before you think it. I'm in the saragent peppers lonely hearts club (single). But I have been accused of being in a relationship. I do have child care commitments and obviously my child comes first.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Some are compulsive liars, as long as they get pussy they don't care who they hurt in their path. Sadly that's not made it easy now for others to message me as im very weary suspicious and think they are all lying to me. That will not get me far on here or be able to enjoy myself as I just can't let my guard down anymore.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

All of the above is true so I now only meet those I've met at socials/events & have developed friendships with, those friends recommended to me or those that I can see from their veris have a record of being reliable. But tbh almost all my lone fun nowadays is at clubs or parties X

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By *r BearMan
over a year ago

port talbot

I am a single guy, I am not married and am unable to accommodate, wether people believe me or not I don’t care.

My bugbear is people being put off by other wankers killing it for the real people like me and others genuine singles, yes my age doesn’t help.

My veris show I’m real, and most people say I’m a nice guy in them, lol but my veris must stand for fuck all, cos they have not helped me in any way what so ever to get meets, All are from social events in Swansea or Newport, don’t get me wrong, they are great meeting places and I would advise people to go to them.

Having shot my self in the foot, all my veris are great people, I see then at socials and chat online.

Because it’s so easy to hide behind a keyboard or mobile phones, there are so many wankers that spoil it for the real people, please don’t be put off, life is too short, enjoy your self, But take care.

Sorry rant over

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I am a single guy, I am not married and am unable to accommodate, wether people believe me or not I don’t care.

My bugbear is people being put off by other wankers killing it for the real people like me and others genuine singles, yes my age doesn’t help.

My veris show I’m real, and most people say I’m a nice guy in them, lol but my veris must stand for fuck all, cos they have not helped me in any way what so ever to get meets, All are from social events in Swansea or Newport, don’t get me wrong, they are great meeting places and I would advise people to go to them.

Having shot my self in the foot, all my veris are great people, I see then at socials and chat online.

Because it’s so easy to hide behind a keyboard or mobile phones, there are so many wankers that spoil it for the real people, please don’t be put off, life is too short, enjoy your self, But take care.

Sorry rant over"

I don't blame u ranting at all. My hubby is the same as you, lovely men but don't get a look in even with great veries. I know there's nice men out there but it's very difficult to connect with what im into and that sadly brings in some horrid people. But we just all must push on forwards with hope x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Personally, I prefer a friendship. It's nice to get to know like minded people and form a bond. Just having fun and you're done, just needs a little more and encourages to remain on touch. Not all single guys are like this. Get in touch lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

But after this you will get more males saying they want/love the whoke friendship thing when really they could be creeps too and saying it coz they've read this....make youre own mind up fond a guy meet 3 or 4 times beore playing if he's still around theres youre answerchat soon

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

maybe,,, on the other foot is when youre single like me, and im single by choice as i work hard and havent the time to devote to someone, people on here think theres something wrong with you if your single for a while, like you have rope, duck tape and a camper van?

would go to a sinlge event but not sure if i would be swapping mobile numbers or the number to the local shrink lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There's always the risk of getting stuck in the friend zone. Friendship is good, but I'm a fab expert on the friend zone and only listed as experienced on the meets activity.

I'd like to improve the balance, but friends are better than nothing

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By *luebell888Woman
over a year ago

Glasgowish

I think the more mature (40+) guys are safer for friendships. The younger ones sadly just require a quick shag.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"maybe,,, on the other foot is when youre single like me, and im single by choice as i work hard and havent the time to devote to someone, people on here think theres something wrong with you if your single for a while, like you have rope, duck tape and a camper van?

would go to a sinlge event but not sure if i would be swapping mobile numbers or the number to the local shrink lol"

You're tarring women with the same brush, is that ironic? Never sure what that means so could be the wrong word X

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I don't blame u ranting at all. My hubby is the same as you, lovely men but don't get a look in even with great veries. I know there's nice men out there but it's very difficult to connect with what im into and that sadly brings in some horrid people. But we just all must push on forwards with hope x "

There are plenty of nice men willing yo give you what you're after. Don't let a bad experience put you off. xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I been on here as part of a married couple and now as a divorced single.

It can be quite hard to strike up a rapport with new people.

I have been back approx 3 weeks now and already kinda got talking to a number of people local to me.

I have had a social meet with an old friend from the site which was lovely.

Think what I’m trying to say is that perseverance and keeping good manners will eventually shine through x

I’m single and can accommodate except Tuesday and Friday when I have my kids.

I find it better to have had some chat and banter as well as just sex coz there is no colder feeling than finishing off and just leaving.

Could be talking jibberish but manners cost nothing x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Think most people miss the whole point of swinging when they are singles.

The social and friendship side plays a big part of it and it's not a shag shop.

Other posts on here say more mature men are respected and have friends but I think that's a load of rubbish as I have met some cracking young guys on here who have or will be very successful on the site due to their well mannered attitude.

However they are susceptible to being tarred with the same bunch of idiots who think they can just have a fuck fest at the click of a button as and when they choose e.g

"Fuck now messages

But it's not just the single Males who struggle with this aspect of the social scene. I have met plenty of single women who just want a fuck with a muscle guy who looks the part but do not engage with other men.

I suppose it's down to numbers for single females, the males outnumber them 3-1...they have plenty of choice and they can be selective.

Males on the other hand have to stand out. If your not a model but have a great personality you won't get very far on the wink/message pipeline.

Yes yes yes I know some will have their opinions on what I have typed but as a rule of thumb, maybe try to put yourself in the perspective of a single male that is genuine and would be more than happy to just chat ? This is why social events are SO IMPORTANT!

And I thank the organisers for making the effort to make this site actually work for what it's was designed for.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Have been on and off here the last 10 years. Site has gone down hill the last 3 years, to the point where i have decided to leave on sunday after my party. Some single guy's think it's a fuck and go site, photo mods haven't a clue, drug and money talk on status's have ruined the site. Made some good friends and will miss the social scene. Enjoy all. Xxx

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By *issvvCouple
over a year ago

pontyclun

I got to say I been very lucky then. The two young men I have met are both more than happy when I mentioned the friends part of it. I think it’s harder to make a connection with couples tho they just message asking for sex straight up

Mrs x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"All of the above is true so I now only meet those I've met at socials/events & have developed friendships with, those friends recommended to me or those that I can see from their veris have a record of being reliable. But tbh almost all my lone fun nowadays is at clubs or parties X"

Think I'm gonna go down this route as well of meeting only at socials. I’ve had more hassle this last week than in the whole 7+ years I’ve been here!

I fully agree that not all single guys are the same, but it’s so hard filtering out the good ones. It’s so cliched to say that the good ones are being tarred with the same brush as the bad ones, but it’s a cliche for a reason, cos I’m my experience, the bad ones outweigh the good! I think I’d rather take the pressure off and meet just at socials, then even if I don’t get to play, I’ve at least had a good night with some lovely genuine people.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"All of the above is true so I now only meet those I've met at socials/events & have developed friendships with, those friends recommended to me or those that I can see from their veris have a record of being reliable. But tbh almost all my lone fun nowadays is at clubs or parties X

Think I'm gonna go down this route as well of meeting only at socials. I’ve had more hassle this last week than in the whole 7+ years I’ve been here!

I fully agree that not all single guys are the same, but it’s so hard filtering out the good ones. It’s so cliched to say that the good ones are being tarred with the same brush as the bad ones, but it’s a cliche for a reason, cos I’m my experience, the bad ones outweigh the good! I think I’d rather take the pressure off and meet just at socials, then even if I don’t get to play, I’ve at least had a good night with some lovely genuine people. "

I'm a much happier woman since I've started to do things this way, takes the pressure off greatly X

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By *amo2121Man
over a year ago

swansea

I think the problem is the same old story that the ratio to men to women is so far apart that it is impossible to separate good guys from bad guys. I'm not up for the generalization that most single men are married because that's impossible for anyone to say. I think if (from a women's perspective) if you have that many problems separating the two then just pick the men that go to socials.

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By *JWMan
over a year ago

caerphilly

Interesting thread and comments but the attitude of single blokes is not helped by the attitude of those they contact. A stack of unread of deleted mail without a hint of a thanks but no thanks makes the decent singles think we bother

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By *amo2121Man
over a year ago

swansea


"Something we have noticed is that we are nearly always being messed around by single guys. Not every single guy but the majority of them. They always seem to message you when they want to hook up and seem to have no interest in a friendship. Is it just us or are other people finding the same thing?"

Maybe if on your profile you state...looking for single guys rather than NOT looking for single guys, some of us tidy ones might filter through...just a thought

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By *issvvCouple
over a year ago

pontyclun

I don’t understand why people can’t just say no thanks or what ever. There has only been once I have ever just deleted a message and that was to someone I had replied to only a few weeks before. I told them I wasn’t playing even tho it’s on my profile that I’m not, and they message the same thing again. Every other message gets some reply even if it’s not straight away

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If someone mails me an they ain't for me I do reply no thankyou An block then it saves future mails clogging up ur inbox n makes room for decent men/couples

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By *aydee65Man
over a year ago

Near Merthyr


"If someone mails me an they ain't for me I do reply no thankyou An block then it saves future mails clogging up ur inbox n makes room for decent men/couples"

I understand that sending 'no thank you' replies to every message is a huge undertaking for a single female due to the volume of mail, and also it often results in even more mail asking, "What's wrong with me then??" or other such stupid questions. However I find that the 'Private Notes' button helps here as if I get a reply saying 'No Thanks' (or even if they've read the mail and deleted, or even looked at my profile but not replied), then I clearly know they're not interested. A simple note to this effect will then remind me not to message them again as I can't see the point in mailing people who aren't interested. It's hardly as if pestering them is going to get them to change their minds is it !!!! It's not rocket science.... really, it isn't !!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If someone mails me an they ain't for me I do reply no thankyou An block then it saves future mails clogging up ur inbox n makes room for decent men/couples

I understand that sending 'no thank you' replies to every message is a huge undertaking for a single female due to the volume of mail, and also it often results in even more mail asking, "What's wrong with me then??" or other such stupid questions. However I find that the 'Private Notes' button helps here as if I get a reply saying 'No Thanks' (or even if they've read the mail and deleted, or even looked at my profile but not replied), then I clearly know they're not interested. A simple note to this effect will then remind me not to message them again as I can't see the point in mailing people who aren't interested. It's hardly as if pestering them is going to get them to change their minds is it !!!! It's not rocket science.... really, it isn't !!"

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By *eepandhardMan
over a year ago

Swansea

Same ol', same ol'

A lot of time wasters weather single male, female or couples.

Most just want a shag and they are rubbish even in that lol.

Most do no care about building a friendship or really understand the meaning of this word.

As several times mentioned best way to meet people is socials and I met a lot on those who a really good friends in and out of the bedroom. Those that i can rely on to feed my fish

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If someone mails me an they ain't for me I do reply no thankyou An block then it saves future mails clogging up ur inbox n makes room for decent men/couples

I understand that sending 'no thank you' replies to every message is a huge undertaking for a single female due to the volume of mail, and also it often results in even more mail asking, "What's wrong with me then??" or other such stupid questions. However I find that the 'Private Notes' button helps here as if I get a reply saying 'No Thanks' (or even if they've read the mail and deleted, or even looked at my profile but not replied), then I clearly know they're not interested. A simple note to this effect will then remind me not to message them again as I can't see the point in mailing people who aren't interested. It's hardly as if pestering them is going to get them to change their minds is it !!!! It's not rocket science.... really, it isn't !!"

That’s a good tip!

I agree that it seems rude not to reply to messages, and I always try to reply if someone’s made an effort. I started yesterday with 201 messages in my inbox - and please don’t think I’m being bigheaded in saying this, I know many other women in the same situation, I’m nothing special. I managed to get it down to 150 by replying and deleting. This morning I have 212 . It really is that hard to get through them all so please guys bear that in mind.

What I do is to start at the oldest messages and scan. If it’s a one-liner like Hi how you doing, or even worse a crude one like My cock will ruin you, I will just delete.

Anyone that’s attached a face picture I will reply to cos I know that can be a big thing for some people. I will take time to read their messages/profile. If the profile has nothing on it then I don’t have much to go on. If I like their profile I’ll say so.

It’s not possible to keep everyone happy, and this week I’ve found out to my detriment with two abusive messages and a meet let down.

I’m off work this week so have a bit of spare time but usually that’s not the case. A bit of understanding from others goes a long way and I always try to return the favour. Xx

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By *londewelsh79Couple
over a year ago

newport


"We've also noticed this with a few single guys. But more recently finding the exact same problem with couples and single females who say they want to meet then go quiet especially when the word 'friendship' is mentioned

Glad it's not just us then... I don't understand it. How can you have sex with someone that you don't have a connection with?

Amen to that.

We didn't really know what to expect when we started swinging, thought it would all be about the sex.... but we rapidly found that we love making like-minded friends.

That's not to say we cant swing with randoms, but given a choice we would prefer to be able to chat and have a giggle with people too. "

We have the exact same view as yours x

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By *ar-Some CoupleCouple
over a year ago

from somewhere glittery & sparkly

Try arranging a singles social....

Our block list gets bigger & bigger every time we arrange one as most don't even turn up nor do they even have the decency to let you know

But saying that we have met quiet a few decent single males

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Or they get to know you over a period of months and then block you on their phone and delete their profile. Ruins it for everyone else who is genuine xx

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By *ay rickMan
over a year ago

cardiff

My own personal opinion is it's no different to real life--some you connect with some you don't--it's life!!--if friendship is wanted aswell as play there's no guarantee that once get to know eachother that it will continue!!--I find all I meet I get on with great on some level and still in contact for laughs and fun!!--it is hard for single guys granted but as I said before--keep to the real world this is just an add on

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By *ar-Some CoupleCouple
over a year ago

from somewhere glittery & sparkly


"Try arranging a singles social....

Our block list gets bigger & bigger every time we arrange one as most don't even turn up nor do they even have the decency to let you know

But saying that we have met quiet a few decent single males "

Oh and I found my hubby so they aren't all bad

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ive been using this site for 10+ years and the whole dynamic of it has changed drastically. Its more about getting picture likes, asling for money and social events. Its become a facebook site but with nudes. I enjoy the friendship side of things and getting to know people but i dont want to make friends, i have very little time for the current friends i have got let alone new friends off here but that doesnt mean i just want to fuck and go. I like to chat, flirt, banter and work up the lust before fucking but i dont necessarily think i need to attend an organised social for that.

Im a genuine guy, not bad looking and am polite but it doesnt matter here any more

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"My own personal opinion is it's no different to real life--some you connect with some you don't--it's life!!--if friendship is wanted aswell as play there's no guarantee that once get to know eachother that it will continue!!--I find all I meet I get on with great on some level and still in contact for laughs and fun!!--it is hard for single guys granted but as I said before--keep to the real world this is just an add on "

Perfectly captured X

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Ive been using this site for 10+ years and the whole dynamic of it has changed drastically. Its more about getting picture likes, asling for money and social events. Its become a facebook site but with nudes. I enjoy the friendship side of things and getting to know people but i dont want to make friends, i have very little time for the current friends i have got let alone new friends off here but that doesnt mean i just want to fuck and go. I like to chat, flirt, banter and work up the lust before fucking but i dont necessarily think i need to attend an organised social for that.

Im a genuine guy, not bad looking and am polite but it doesnt matter here any more"

I couldn’t agree more with this.

I have been a couple on here and now a single guy and will admit when a couple the whole going out for a meal together etc getting to know each other was nice and I still have a few friends from that time.

I am always polite and well mannered. Old style values but most choices are made by looks alone.

Unfortunately most of the tidy nice and polite blokes are not egotistical good looking jocks. Women chose aesthetically probably 90% of the time so are open to the kind of one line bullshit off these guys. Some women like being talked to that way but not most so they get what they want.

More choice allows women to cherry pick meets.

Always gonna be tough on single guys.

You just gotta stay true to yourself and persevere x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes. True. I’m a newbie and have not met anyone on here yet. I know im a single guy who works all the time and juggles single parent life too. It’s hard to go out to pubs and clubs and talk to women. I’m average, I’m not drop dead gorgeous either, but it seems that women on here are sceptical and don’t know the good from the bad. I message to chat, but no one chats back. Shame.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

True that mate.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Going for the wrong single guys me thinks

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You may find the ‘majority’ of genuine single guys are willing to openly post on these forums as they have no hidden agendas?

Perhaps these guys posting out in the open will stand them in good stead?

Who knows?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Yes. True. I’m a newbie and have not met anyone on here yet. I know im a single guy who works all the time and juggles single parent life too. It’s hard to go out to pubs and clubs and talk to women. I’m average, I’m not drop dead gorgeous either, but it seems that women on here are sceptical and don’t know the good from the bad. I message to chat, but no one chats back. Shame. "

Maybe if you really want a meet try a little harder and not have a defeatist attitude . Yep it’s hard going for blokes on here build friendships attraction is always deeper than skin deep

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By *amo2121Man
over a year ago

swansea


"Yes. True. I’m a newbie and have not met anyone on here yet. I know im a single guy who works all the time and juggles single parent life too. It’s hard to go out to pubs and clubs and talk to women. I’m average, I’m not drop dead gorgeous either, but it seems that women on here are sceptical and don’t know the good from the bad. I message to chat, but no one chats back. Shame.

Maybe if you really want a meet try a little harder and not have a defeatist attitude . Yep it’s hard going for blokes on here build friendships attraction is always deeper than skin deep "

I nearly cried seeing that...did I say cry....sorry predictive text I meant cringe lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Yes. True. I’m a newbie and have not met anyone on here yet. I know im a single guy who works all the time and juggles single parent life too. It’s hard to go out to pubs and clubs and talk to women. I’m average, I’m not drop dead gorgeous either, but it seems that women on here are sceptical and don’t know the good from the bad. I message to chat, but no one chats back. Shame.

Maybe if you really want a meet try a little harder and not have a defeatist attitude . Yep it’s hard going for blokes on here build friendships attraction is always deeper than skin deep

I nearly cried seeing that...did I say cry....sorry predictive text I meant cringe lol "

Which bit are you referring to princess

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By *amo2121Man
over a year ago

swansea


"Yes. True. I’m a newbie and have not met anyone on here yet. I know im a single guy who works all the time and juggles single parent life too. It’s hard to go out to pubs and clubs and talk to women. I’m average, I’m not drop dead gorgeous either, but it seems that women on here are sceptical and don’t know the good from the bad. I message to chat, but no one chats back. Shame.

Maybe if you really want a meet try a little harder and not have a defeatist attitude . Yep it’s hard going for blokes on here build friendships attraction is always deeper than skin deep

I nearly cried seeing that...did I say cry....sorry predictive text I meant cringe lol

Which bit are you referring to princess "

Well...all of it of course

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Single genuine guy reveal yourself lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Love it spot on.please don't put the one in a million that is different just like the lady are too. It's what excites a load of ppl but very few can work juggling live have a little thing make them smile for as many days that keep us going xx

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By *amo2121Man
over a year ago

swansea


"Single genuine guy reveal yourself lol"

Danaaa x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Its a shame some guys are spoiling it for genuine guys who want to meet. We are not all the same!! friendship is good too and I've tried the "coffee" approach (I'm old school) which hopefully will lead to other things but as yet haven't been successful with that, is that approach wrong?. Lets hope things improve so people won't get pissed off and leave.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Single genuine guy reveal yourself lol"

Boooo lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Ive been using this site for 10+ years and the whole dynamic of it has changed drastically. Its more about getting picture likes, asling for money and social events. Its become a facebook site but with nudes. I enjoy the friendship side of things and getting to know people but i dont want to make friends, i have very little time for the current friends i have got let alone new friends off here but that doesnt mean i just want to fuck and go. I like to chat, flirt, banter and work up the lust before fucking but i dont necessarily think i need to attend an organised social for that.

Im a genuine guy, not bad looking and am polite but it doesnt matter here any more"

Couldn’t agree more with this!

It’s nice building a rapport with people and we have a couple of single guys we have met with more than a few times and enjoy they’re company as well as other things of course lol

I wouldn’t call them friends though we didn’t get into swinging to make friends we already have those

If that makes us bad swingers then so be it we enjoy ourselves and enjoy the site

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's really tough being a married guy here with wife's knowledge and wanting friendship. Very few will even read your message let alone have a conversation.

When you do get to talk most don't believe that the wife knows and supports or they simply say it's too much drama.

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By *erebralStimulationCouple
over a year ago

Newcastle


"Some are compulsive liars, as long as they get pussy they don't care who they hurt in their path. Sadly that's not made it easy now for others to message me as im very weary suspicious and think they are all lying to me. That will not get me far on here or be able to enjoy myself as I just can't let my guard down anymore. "

I think what has happened is this is no longer a swingers site. The vast majority of newer members see it as a fuck and go site. True swinging in all its forms is based very much on the social aspects. Please keep the faith there are genuine people who need a connection and element of friendship on the site. Just takes a little time.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

think it's the modern, entitlement age. People, particularly the younger ones seem to want more and more instant gratification. It's not only with this side of things but things in general.

When it comes to the 'fuck and go' aspect there seems to be a want to see the person and the moment as separate entities to anything else in their lives.

You can understand, to a point why this is, be it partners who are unaware of their shenanigans or don't like to mix because they fear being outed, etc. But, there seems to be a lack of acknowledgement that everything is interconnected. This leads some to believe that their sexual partner(s) at that moment in time are simply a means to an end, with no emotional (on whatever level) attachment to those people.

Some might say it's almost narcissistic and, it could be said, destructive behaviour.

But, it's something that, in a sex club environment, is unavoidable and probably even expected. Plus it makes everything a lot more exciting in that setting, which is kind of why they exist.

Although, if it's an arranged meet, then it is a shallow endeavour that is not deserving of any more attention than that.

The whole idea of friendship to the 'fuck and go' individual (both male and female) to them means attachment. Which is what they try to avoid.

I'd like to make it clear, however that I am not judging (I couldn't care what people do/believe, so long it isn't preached to me) so I'm not saying that either agree nor disagree with this kind of attitude towards swinging. I'm just making an observation and I am certainly not a 'fuck and go' type

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Something we have noticed is that we are nearly always being messed around by single guys. Not every single guy but the majority of them. They always seem to message you when they want to hook up and seem to have no interest in a friendship. Is it just us or are other people finding the same thing?"

Considering I've just been messed around by a couple in the worst possible way this post is ironic

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